[WIND CHIMES CHIMING]
- [ROTATING SPRINKLERS WATERING] - [BIRDS CHIRPING]
[PLANE DRONING OVERHEAD]
[♪♪♪]
[CHIMES]
[TWEETING]
[CHIMING]
JULIE: So after breakfast, Teddy, I'm gonna tidy up,
and then I'm gonna do a little bit of work.
And then your cousin Ellie is gonna come over.
- [BABY COOS] - Can you say "Ellie"?
Ellie.
Okay.
What do you think the next book should be about, Champy?
You like that color.
Pinky Tinkerbink unlocks her courage.
You like that idea?
Huh?
Mama's not good with circles. No, she's not.
You're gonna love peaches, Teddy.
Your dad loves peaches, but he's allergic to the skin.
Hopefully, you won't be allergic.
And if you are, I'll just peel the skins off for you.
- Okay. It'll be easy. - [BLENDER WHIRS]
ETHAN: Hey, guys.
- Morning. - Hi, babe.
- ETHAN: Got something to show me? - JULIE: Yes,
I have something to show you.
Great. Hey, buddy.
- [BABBLES] - Okay.
Okay, so from my reading
they asked me to design a poster, right,
and then I designed the whole window.
- Of course you did. - Pinky's in the middle
of this big rainbow, and it's super bright,
and she's throwing up all these 3D hearts up in the air.
And then, look. Every kid gets to leave with one of these.
A magic pinkie ring.
You're not even listening to me.
Yes, I am. I'm always listening.
No, you're giving me that look that you give me.
I'm looking in your eyes. She has nice eyes.
Your mom has very nice eyes. Just like yours.
I just don't know what you're trying to find.
[SCOFFS]
You.
I'm right here.
Crap.
Okay. I gotta go.
Gotta go. Bye, buddy. Love you.
Bye, Mommy. Mwah!
Okay, okay.
I'll meet you on the corner outside, 34th and 7th, 7 p.m.
Please don't be too late. I really wanna see this game.
[GASPS] Who's that?
[GASPS] Hola, Teddy.
Buenos días, Hector.
- Hector, can I ride down with you? - Sure.
- Bye. - We love you.
[SOFTLY] Bye, Dada.
Those feets in?
Got those feets in?
Okay.
Does it feel good?
Does that feel good, Teddy?
Good boy.
That feels nice, doesn't it?
- Yeah, that's very warm. - [TEDDY FUSSING]
That's very warm.
[TOY SQUEAKS]
Oops!
Baby.
You know you're gonna walk soon?
And when you start walking,
you're gonna trip and skin your knee.
You're gonna bop your head on the coffee table,
but you're gonna keep going.
Because that's what champions do.
Right, Champy?
They keep going.
Who's a good boy?
See all those flowers?
[SOFTLY] Pretty flowers.
[♪♪♪]
Yeah.
[TEDDY COOS]
[SLIDE CLICKS]
MUPPETS' ERNIE [ON TV]: Look at that moon.
That's pretty.
You ever think you might like to visit the moon?
Well, I did.
[GENTLE THEME PLAYING]
♪ Well, I'd like To visit the moon ♪
♪ On a rocket ship ♪
- [PHONE RINGING] - ♪ High in the air ♪
♪ Yes, I'd like to visit The moon ♪
♪ But I don't think I'd like to live there ♪
♪ Though I'd like to look down At the Earth from above ♪
- [ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS] - WOMAN: Julie, pick up.
We know you're there.
We just parked. Need anything?
Starbucks?
Ellie, stop pulling my hair.
You're gonna pull all my hair out.
We'll be there in ten minutes, okay? Bye.
♪ I could meet All the fish everywhere ♪
♪ Yes, I'd travel Under the sea ♪
♪ But I don't think I'd like to live there ♪
Ellie will be here soon.
♪ But there's not much to do ♪
♪ When your friends Are all fish ♪
♪ And an oyster and clam Aren't real family ♪
♪ So I don't want to live In the sea ♪
♪ I'd like to visit the jungle Hear the lion roar ♪
♪ Go back in time And meet a dinosaur ♪
♪ There's so many strange Places I'd like to be ♪
♪ But none of them Permanently ♪
♪ So if I should visit The moon ♪
♪ Well, I'll dance On a moonbeam and then ♪
♪ I will make a wish On a star ♪
♪ And I'll wish I was home Once again ♪
♪ Though I'd like to look down At the Earth from above ♪
♪ I would miss all the places And the people I love ♪
♪ So although I may go I'll be coming home soon ♪
♪ 'Cause I don't want to live On the moon ♪
♪ No, I don't want to live ♪
♪ On the moon ♪
[TRAFFIC HONKING IN DISTANCE]
[PEOPLE CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]
[♪♪♪]
What are you looking at? Do you see your balloon?
Do you see that balloon? That's for you.
Almost home, Champy. We're almost there.
[CHILDREN LAUGHING]
Okay.
So, okay.
Hi, guys.
- Hey. - How's my favorite grandson?
Here we go.
- Are you ready for a bottle? - Hi. Hi.
Come here, baby, come here. I got you. I got you.
Oh! Who's a beautiful boy?
- [PHONE RINGING] - Hey. Hey there. Hey.
I got it.
- Hello? - ETHAN: Hey.
Hi.
- How are things? - Great.
We just got back from the shoe store.
And our little guy
with those chubby little feet is a size four.
- Walker. Wide. - Wow.
Listen, um...
I won't be late tonight.
I'll meet those guys after work
and come home at halftime. Okay?
I wanna go tonight with you, actually. Um...
I mean, my mom did the laundry and puffed the pillows
and she's giving Teddy his bottle as we speak,
so I feel like, since you have her standing guard,
we should take advantage of it.
Jule, it's just temporary, you know?
Just until you're strong enough
to take care of Teddy on your own.
- Oh, shit, so like forever? - [SIGHS]
Are you sure you're ready to see Lucy?
Yeah. Yeah. I want to.
I need to go.
Okay.
I'll meet you outside.
Okay, I'll, um... I'll see you soon.
Love you.
I love you. Bye.
[SHOWER RUNNING]
I'm having my face done.
No, you're not. That's ridiculous, Mom.
There was an opening on Teddy's birthday.
Luckiest day of the year.
But then I thought you might need me for his party.
Party? What party?
He doesn't have any friends. Who would we invite?
But you do. Come on, it will be a good reset.
Have people over, let everyone know you're okay.
And it would make it easy for your dad to come back.
Uh-huh.
You know he loves you very much.
Mom, I love you, but you have to stop
standing outside of the shower.
[INHALES, EXHALES DEEPLY]
[INTERCOM BEEPS]
Hello, Ms. Davis.
I'm Dr. Sylvester.
I'm a psychiatrist here in the hospital.
Is my son okay?
Yes, he's absolutely fine.
Cute little guy.
He's waiting with your husband at your home.
My sister-in-law, she's gonna kill me.
No, no, no.
They very much wanna see you,
but I thought it might be a good idea
if we had a chance to talk first.
- Is that okay? - Yeah.
Okay.
Can you tell me what happened?
Is this the first time you've tried to take your life?
Yeah.
Have you come close before? Thought about it before?
I think about it all the time.
How far back does that go?
On and off since I was in the first grade.
That's when things started changing.
In what way?
Things were fuzzy.
Memory's fuzzy.
I-I don't know how else to explain it.
- Does mental illness run in your family? - No.
That's not true.
My mom would say that my dad's mentally ill.
My husband would say that
my dad's mental illness
- looks a lot like being an asshole. - [CHUCKLES]
What about more recently?
How did you do when you were pregnant?
I managed.
How about after you had the baby?
There was just more or less,
the same thing I'd been experiencing most of my life.
Felt spoiled and too weak.
Like every other woman
would do a better job taking care of Teddy.
Both of them.
[SCOFFS]
[SOFTLY] Um...
Yeah.
You may or may not remember this, but in the 1970s,
there were rumors that there were spider eggs in this stuff.
And people just stopped chewing it.
For a while, I actually thought that was true.
Even after they took out an ad in the New York Times
and I knew it wasn't true, I still couldn't chew it.
It's funny how that happens. A rumor starts, you believe it,
and you find out it's not true, and still
you can't put the damn gum in your mouth.
And then just the other day,
I'm in the drug store with my daughter,
and I tell her to pick some candy.
Wouldn't you know, she just grabs this.
You know, it's pink, it's eye level. Sure.
But then, suddenly, my thought process goes like this:
"Wait a minute, she's still too young for gum.
She's gonna choke."
And then I think, "You're a medical man.
You know she won't choke. That's crazy."
And it hit me.
It was my irrational fear of spider eggs.
After all these years.
[SCOFFS]
I guess we all need to learn
where the spider eggs actually are.
And perhaps more importantly, where they are not.
[TEDDY COOING]
Who's a hungry boy?
Oh, such a good eater.
There you go.
Mom, can you wrap me?
- What a good boy you are. - Please.
Sure.
Can't get this one.
I need to cut your hair, buddy.
We can take him to a barber shop.
You afraid of me with scissors?
No, I'm scared he's gonna look ugly.
- Not gonna look ugly. - There.
That's good. Covers up everything.
All it took were just a couple strands of beads.
Hey, bubs. Hi.
- Oh, look at this. - Sweet boy.
Look at this.
Oh, God.
It's what my face is gonna look like.
And they're gonna shave the cartilage.
I mean, everyone's nose gets more bulbous as they age.
And their teeth shift.
One day, if I'm not here,
I want you to watch your nose and your teeth.
Dead giveaways. You know?
You wanna feed him?
[TEDDY FUSSING]
It's okay, different time. A different time.
- You don't wanna be late. - Yeah.
You go have fun with your husband.
Don't you worry. I'm here.
Yeah, you can have another bite.
- Yeah. - Sorry. You're beautiful, Mom.
No face-lifts, okay?
You'll look like an alien. I love you so much.
I'll look ten years younger.
I love you, I love you, I love you.
[KISSES] Have fun. Have fun.
Okay, I'm going.
Hey, Jule.
Yeah?
You think he's okay, right?
I mean, you don't think anything has happened to him, do you?
Dad? No, I'm not worried about him.
Because I've always been able to reach him. I can't reach him.
Maybe he doesn't wanna be found.
- Would you like another bite? - I love you.
♪ If you kiss a ukulele lady ♪
♪ And you promise Ever to be true ♪
I'm locking the door.
♪ If she sees Another ukulele lady ♪
♪ Mess around on you ♪
♪ Maybe she'll cry An awful lot ♪
♪ Maybe she'll sigh And maybe not ♪
♪ Maybe she'll find Somebody else ♪
[♪♪♪]
[SIREN WAILING]
Jesus. Just hold on. Hold on.
You made it.
You all right?
Mm-hm. Yeah, I got this.
- You got this? - Yeah.
[FOOTBALL GAME PLAYING ON TV]
- Hey. - Hey, look at you.
- Oh! Good to see you. - Yeah.
Hey, buddy, good to see you.
So, what do you think? Our guy's gonna pull through, huh?
Mortal lock.
Listen to your fucking husband, huh?
The eternal fucking optimist.
[SCOFFS] You don't have to tell me.
Come on, let's sit. Lucy's here.
- Hey, sis. - Hey.
KEVIN: All right, so drinks. Want drinks?
- ETHAN: Yes. - Beers, huh?
- SERVER: What are we having? - Hi. Can I get
four Coronas with lime?
You want...? Extra lime. Thanks.
- You got it. - Yeah.
ETHAN: Sure. Sounds good.
Yeah.
I got apps, all right?
I already got some, uh...
Got those little teeny-tiny hot dogs and nachos.
- All right. Yum. - Thank you.
Yummy, yummy.
Thanks.
You guys know who Shel Silverstein is?
He's the guy that wrote The Giving Tree.
- Sure. - Yeah. He's, like, one of my heroes.
I mean, there's like Schulz, Seuss,
Sendak, Hans Christian Anderson.
But that's besides the point. Anyway, before he was famous,
he sold hot dogs for the White Sox and Chicago Cubs.
You know what that's like? That's like working
for the Mets and the Yankees.
Yeah. And then when he was famous,
an interviewer asked him what he learned, and they...
He said, um, that everybody likes ketchup.
Everybody likes mustard.
Yeah. That was it. That was what he learned.
KEVIN: Mustard.
Are you done with that story?
Mind if I change the subject really quickly?
- I'm just wondering... - ETHAN: Stop.
Go ahead. Let her say what she wants to say.
Did you ever think about what it would be like for us?
Ellie thought she was coming over for a play date.
- Okay, stop. - KEVIN: Okay.
Oh, how was the house?
Did you like the house? It's nice, right?
- No. - What?
- Um...
I went and saw a house for sale, down the street from them.
It's really nice. There's a big yard.
Very affordable.
There's a basketball hoop.
You can watch Teddy play from the kitchen window.
Houses scare me.
And I love our apartment. I'm happy there.
- I'm really happy there. - LUCY: Now I'm lost. I'm sorry.
- Okay. - You say that you're happy there?
- Okay, guys. - I'm so confused. I'm very confused.
I'm sorry, it's just, it's always...
It's always about you, Julie.
It's never about him.
Have you ever even asked him what it was like for him?
Ask him what he did every night while you were in the hospital.
Tell her what you did.
I think a move might be good for us, that's all.
He would come home after work,
after visiting you in the hospital,
after putting your son to bed, and you know what he would do?
He would scrub the carpet.
That's the thing about blood Julie.
Your blood, it won't come out of the carpet.
- Where you going? - I'm gonna pee. I have to pee.
- Are you happy? - Really? Really, Luce?
Let me.
[SCOFFS]
[APPLAUSE ON TV]
[FANS CHEERING]
[♪♪♪]
[CREAKING]
[WATER RUNNING]
ETHAN: Jule?
[WIND CHIMES CHIMING]
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
[CHILDREN LAUGHING]
FATHER: Yeah! You ready?
You ready?
One, two...
[LINE HUMS]
[DIALING]
[LINE TRILLING]
Hey, this is Ron.
Leave a message and I'll get back to you as...
[GRUNTS SOFTLY]
Why are you scared of houses?
Houses are great. Everyone loves houses.
Let's say that you're on one end of the house
and I'm on the other end,
and I call your name and you don't hear me. Then what?
We get walkie-talkies?
What if there's a thunderstorm and you're in the city,
and Teddy and I are alone out there?
I drive home.
And what if you crash?
Then I limp to a train and walk the rest of the way.
What if we move up there and you stop loving me?
Well...
I mean, you can't really blame the house for that.
Jule.
I'm never gonna stop loving you.
How about this? I promise to go to the roof of our house
and sneak cigarettes with you.
[COUGHS]
[GROANS]
I mean, you would get to see the stars again.
They're getting better.
[♪♪♪]
Wow.
Look at that.
I have a birthday boy who's very excited to see his mommy.
- Happy birthday, my love. - Yeah.
Hi, Champy.
Happy birthday.
Do you like your sign?
It says, "Happy birthday, Teddy Bear."
Mama made that sign.
She just finished it. You wanna see what I got you?
- Want some presents? - Do you want to see?
- Okay. - All right. So, what do we got here?
What is this?
Hmm.
Homemade surprise?
Wow.
[JULIE GASPS]
- Too much? - No.
[COOS]
- He likes it. Wow. - He likes it.
Yeah?
Very cute.
- It's not my birthday. - Open it.
The next Pinky book is about hope.
Thank you.
[♪♪♪]
We made it to 1.
[TEDDY COOS]
What do you think?
[CHUCKLES]
We made it to 1.
[BABBLING]
Sorry I'm so hairy.
I see 50 of these a day.
It would have to snap like a turtle for me to notice.
Okay.
All done.
Why don't you sit up.
It's Teddy's birthday. Today.
- Yeah. - Doing anything to celebrate?
He's gonna have his first chocolate cake tonight.
- I'm gonna bake it for him. - Amazing.
I have to tell you, I've started asking new mothers
how they're feeling when they come in. Not just physically,
but really how they're doing.
That's because of you.
That's really good.
How are the antidepressants working for you?
Good, you know?
I was walking through a world that was black-and-white,
and now I'm just starting to see color again, so...
- Good. - Yeah.
And how are your periods? They still obliterating you?
You know the silver lining here? Heh.
I hate to say that I haven't got my period,
and it's been like two months.
All the blood loss maybe?
Makes sense.
Okay. Good. I'm gonna have Barbara take some blood,
have you pee in a cup. You know the drill.
Okay.
And I'll be back in a minute.
Okay.
[♪♪♪]
When?
October.
October is soon.
Some bread crumbs.
Good, good. Okay.
Yeah.
Didn't know there were so many bread crumbs.
Isn't that the same thing? Same thing.
- [TEDDY FUSSING] - Okay.
I'll just get these. No, I'll get these. Okay.
And vanilla extract,
and then we have soda water, and then we're done.
I gotta get some water for Daddy.
He loves fizzy water.
You can help me out.
[SIGHS] There's a lot of options here.
[SOFTLY] It's not that hard. Okay.
CLERK [OVER P.A.]: The store will be closing shortly.
Oh, this isn't that hard. It's not that hard.
MAN [DISTANTLY]: Ma'am?
Ma'am.
[NORMALLY] Ma'am.
Ma'am, you haven't paid yet.
Ma'am, you have to pay.
Okay. Teddy, let go of the lemon, baby.
Come on. Good boy.
Teddy, we didn't pay for that.
[SIREN CHIRPING]
[CARS HONKING LOUDLY]
[♪♪♪]
ETHAN: Hey.
ETHAN: Here to see Dr. Sylvester.
It's Julie Davis. I'm Ethan Davis.
JULIE: I understand what you're saying,
but I just can't do it.
I didn't have a glass of wine or a Diet Coke
when I was pregnant with Teddy.
Didn't have coffee or cigarettes.
If you were diabetic, would you stop taking medicine?
That's not the same thing.
This feels like a conversation, guys, but it isn't.
Okay? You have to stay on the antidepressant.
You can go off the drug,
and your pregnancy hormones might protect you.
But after, when you go back on, it might not work.
Or it might take too long to work.
That's not a risk to take. Is it?
Now, I know you're a very strong woman.
I know you want that to be enough.
But you can be as strong as, uh, Hercules himself,
and if you fall into a pool and you don't know how to swim,
you'll drown.
But I know how to swim.
[ETHAN SCOFFS]
You know, when I was in college, I fancied myself a poet
because I was dating a poet in my junior year.
And we used to read poems to each other
every night before bed.
And one night, my lady friend read me
this poem.
It made quite an impression on me.
Your small brother is making his balloon squeak like a cat.
Seeming to see a funny pink world he might like to eat
on the other side of it,
he bites, then sits back,
fat jug
contemplating a world clear as water.
A red shred in his little fist.
Uh, I knew I could spend the rest of my life trying,
I'd never write a line as good as that.
That's one of the last poems that Sylvia Plath wrote
before taking her life.
I can remember thinking,
"How does someone who sees that much life and hope in a balloon
"simply bake her kids cookies
and then stick her head in the oven?"
How is that possible?
Because she knew the beauty that she was leaving behind,
and yet the pain was so bad
that death became her only option.
Let's wait.
Wait?
Let's wait.
Let's get Teddy out of diapers.
No one will ever judge you for it.
No one will ever even know.
I'll know.
Jule, listen to him.
We got lucky the last time.
[DOOR OPENS]
[DOOR SLAMS]
You can be mad at me, that's fine.
Oh, I hate when you do that, Ethan.
You give me permission to be mad at you.
I'll be mad at you if I wanna be mad at you.
- And you can be mad at me too. - No, I can't.
I'm not allowed to get mad at you.
You left no room for me to get mad at you.
You made sure of that.
[SCOFFS]
Wow, that's not fair.
Fair? Really?
Do you wanna talk about fair?
I didn't think so.
[ELEVATOR CHIMES]
Come on.
[SIGHS]
Okay.
Okay?
Okay.
[WATER RUNNING]
- [DOORBELL RINGS] - [WATER STOPS]
Hey. A man from the market, he brought this.
Thanks.
[SIGHS]
Okay.
It's nice to have you back again.
Hey, Hector.
It's okay.
[SOBS]
It's gonna be okay.
We'll have another baby, and just like with Teddy,
we won't be able to remember
what the world was like without him.
Or her.
It's a good thing.
Yeah.
It's good.
[SNIFFLES]
[GAME DRONING INDISTINCTLY ON TV]
ANNOUNCER [ON TV]: And two more.
[COMPUTER KEYBOARD CLACKING]
[PHONE VIBRATING]
[EXHALES DEEPLY]
Hey, buddy.
Oh, boy. Really?
[SUCKS TEETH]
Okay. How's she doing?
Great. I'm gonna head down right now.
I have everything she asked for.
Yup, that too.
Okay. See you soon. Call me if there's any updates.
Okay. Love you. Bye.
Okay.
You like this?
Trees? Yeah.
It'll be quiet.
You'll get used to it.
You think the people who lived here were happy?
Mm... Probably.
Do you think we'll be happy here?
I do, actually.
I think we'll be very happy here.
Me too.
I do too.
The lungs are developing nicely.
Cardiac activity is excellent. Ten fingers, ten toes, and...
last but not the least... Come on, you little rascal.
There we go. Yup.
Wanna know the sex?
- Yes. - No.
How about I write it down on a piece of paper,
and then you can check it when you're ready?
Or not.
Ah.
This is for your scrapbook.
And I will see you in a month.
You're doing great.
She's doing great.
- Thank you, Doctor. - Thank you.
[♪♪♪]
- Ten fingers, ten toes. - Ten fingers, ten toes.
- WOMAN: Hi there. - Hi.
Hi.
- Two strawberry. - Yeah.
Two strawberry.
Two strawberry shortcakes coming up.
Thank you.
Two. It's for you. Thank you.
Yes.
- Don't drop her. - Why would I drop her?
[JULIE GIGGLING]
That's right. That's it. That's my big and strong what?
Powerful legs.
Watch me flex my...
What word are we looking for? Thank you. Flex my...
Thank you. Flex my... What?
Ready? Hey, come on. Right here.
Hey, look.
What is she doing?
"The world was dark and gray, and Pinky was scared.
"But she was also very brave.
"Pinky climbed inch by inch to the top of the tower.
"Stuck her finger into the keyhole,
"and then she turned it.
"And the bell began to ring and vibrate.
"The carousel animals began to spin,
"and, suddenly, a giant rainbow came pouring out.
"The sky became blue, the grass turned green.
"Flowers popped up pink, purple, yellow, and red.
"The world was bright with color.
And Pinky wasn't scared anymore."
Raise your hand if you're scared of the dark.
- Me. - You're scared of the dark?
- CHILD: Yep. - JULIE: Why?
- CHILD: Monsters. - JULIE: Monsters.
What do you do?
My mommy says everyone has monsters in their head.
So when my monster comes out at night,
all I need to do is close my eyes and tell him to go away.
And does it work?
- CHILD: Sometimes. - JULIE: Sometimes.
You know, when I was your age,
I was also very scared of monsters.
Before bed, I would go out to my window
and I would look out at the stars,
and I would pick a star and I would wish on it.
And what I wished for was a best friend.
I wanted a best friend to support me and stay by my side.
And I wanted someone to tell secrets to.
Somebody who would help me slay the monsters.
And it took me a really long time to find a best friend
because she didn't exist.
I had to dream her up.
And now she's...
She's always by my side.
I have an idea.
How about we all draw
- our own monster slayer? - [CHILDREN CLAMORING]
What do you think?
[CLOCK CHIMING]
ETHAN: When I was little, I used to think
that an elf lived inside every clock
and it was up to him to keep time moving.
Really?
I used to get worried. "What if he fell asleep?"
So I'd try to stay up as late as I could
to make sure that the elf stayed awake and time kept moving.
Well, that's a lot of responsibility for a little elf.
Yeah.
I was a funny kid.
What are we having?
- Are you sure? - Yeah.
Yeah.
You told me not to tell you.
Then, uh, tell me if it's a boy,
and then don't tell me if it's a girl.
Okay.
- A girl? - [GIGGLES] Yeah.
[GIGGLING]
- A little girl? - Yeah.
- Hello, little girl. - A little girl.
We're having a girl.
I can't...
I can't have a daughter.
What if she doesn't like me?
She'll love you.
Well, maybe she won't like my hair.
What if she doesn't like my hair?
- She's gonna love your hair. - My voice.
What if she doesn't like my voice?
What if she cringes at the sound of my voice?
- Oh, God. - Julie.
- Julie, Julie. Deep breaths. Hey. - Uh-huh.
- I... - Hey, hey, hey.
Look at me. This is beautiful.
This is amazing.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Julie, Julie, hey. It's okay.
It's okay. Hey. Look at me. It's gonna be fine.
It's okay. Deep breaths.
Okay? Shh. It's okay. It's gonna be okay.
It's gonna be fine.
[SHUSHING]
[CLOCK CHIMING CONTINUOUS]
Tell him. Tell him what happened in the park today.
- I... I don't... - Tell him, Julie.
I think he's making a bigger deal out of it than it is.
It's all easy for me, right?
All I do all the time is worry, is she okay?
And I have no idea,
because she's so good at pretending.
But for a second, I saw today...
[SCOFFS]
She couldn't pretend,
and I know she's not okay.
- She's not okay. - I'm...
I'm emotional because I'm pregnant,
- and I feel that's pretty normal. - Don't lie.
Don't say that. That's... Don't lie.
I'm sorry?
I'm... I'm not the liar.
What does that mean? How am I lying?
Why do you love me?
- [SCOFFS] - Look at me.
All you ever wanna do is look at me in my eyes,
and now you look away?
Because it's scary, right?
And I've been telling you.
I've been telling you you were gonna look away.
I warned him that if he saw me,
if he really saw how ugly I am...
that you would have no choice but to look away.
And I was right.
So that makes you the liar.
Why don't you try telling him what happened that day, Julie?
"Bye-bye, trains." Ready?
Ready? On the count of three, say, "Bye-bye, trains."
JULIE: Every time I'm alone,
I'm afraid something bad's gonna happen to Teddy.
Now say, "Bye-bye, kitchen." Bye-bye, kitchen.
Every time I feed him,
I'm afraid he's going to choke to death.
Thank you. Yes.
If I see someone with a pot of tea or hot water,
I'm afraid it's going to fall on him,
and he's gonna get hurt because I didn't protect him.
All packed up, ready to go?
I need a minute.
Okay.
We'll be downstairs.
Whenever I give him a bath, I just think,
"What if he drowns?
What happens if I look away for one second and he drowns?"
When I think of him looking up at me
with those brave, trusting eyes...
I keep hearing...
"You're gonna fail.
You can't help but fail."
And the thought of that, like, failing him...
And then I think, "Well, we all fail.
"One way or another.
We're all going to die."
So that morning,
I knew that your sister was coming over
and I thought, "Just do it.
"Lucy's coming over. She'll take care of him.
"Just do it now before you change your mind.
Because he's safer in the world without you."
- [POLICE SIREN WAILING DISTANTLY] - [TOYS RATTLE]
[COOING]
[♪♪♪]
[LEAVES RUSTLING]
Only you would get sunburned from a happy lamp.
Do you have a minute?
Really? Again?
- Please. - I... I...
- I have nothing more to add. - Just one second. Come on.
[SIGHS]
- Oh, my gosh. - Okay.
I'm just not sure.
Gloria Steinem wouldn't paint her daughter's room pink.
Yeah, but Gloria Steinem didn't have kids.
Right, but what if pink is asking too much of her?
Maybe she'll be a tomboy,
and pink makes her feel bad about herself.
Like... Like she's not pink enough.
I think you'll have ruined her life.
I'm serious. This is serious. It's very important. Like...
I don't think I believe in the color pink.
Is that a thing? Believing in the color pink?
- Ethan! - I'm taking this very seriously.
Every time we talk about it, I take it very seriously.
- It's not that many times. - It's very many times.
Okay, well, you know what?
I appreciate your patience. I do.
How about this? I have an idea.
Close your eyes, reach out and point to a color.
Go.
Point!
- Point to one! - Ooh, okay!
- What is it? Petal pink. - Petal pink.
- Great.
I'm gonna get two gallons of petal pink, okay?
And if you don't like it, I'll repaint for you.
- All right? - Yes.
We should get Teddy dressed and go over there.
[WHISPERING] Do I look normal?
I wouldn't go that far.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]
ETHAN: Show-off.
JULIE: Guys, this is so cute.
Thank you.
LUCY: You're welcome.
Please don't worry. Ellie is so good with him.
I know. I know.
KEVIN: All right, already.
Thank you. Look at the ball.
Oh.
LINDSAY: Okay, iced tea?
LUCY: Oh, yes, please.
- No, thank you. - Why?
Nothing bad'll happen.
A little caffeine might be good for you.
- PAM: I'm jealous. - Yeah.
Nick and I aren't having any more,
and look...
there's some great things about that.
No diapers...
But I miss having a baby.
I miss that feeling of breastfeeding.
Oh, God, I love that.
LINDSAY: Do you think you'll breastfeed with this one?
- Uh... - LINDSAY: Is that safe?
Is that okay? Can you breastfeed and everything?
Are you sure?
LUCY: I have no judgment.
No judgment.
PAM: Are you insane, girl? I'm just saying...
- LUCY: Yes. Absolutely. - I know that.
[COOING]
Teddy! Hey, sorry.
I'm sorry, can you be careful?
- [TEDDY CRYING] - Come here. Come here.
Oh, it's okay.
Hey. You okay?
Yeah. We should go. We should go.
- Okay. - Come on. Okay.
Sorry, baby.
Excuse me, excuse me. Come on, boy.
JULIE: I know I'm not okay
and that I need the medicine.
But I feel like I'm failing her.
Jule, a lot of people took formula
and they still love their mothers.
You know?
You're gonna be a great mom, no matter what.
Whether you breastfeed her or not, okay?
I don't know how I'm supposed to make her feel close to me.
I don't know how I'm supposed to make her feel safe.
How many prices is she gonna have to pay, Ethan,
for me being her mom?
Sometimes I close my eyes and I picture her,
you know, running through a field of flowers
in a little white dress with her arms open
and I think, "That's what I wanna give her."
You know?
I wanna give her the ability to laugh without fear.
And then I think...
"How am I gonna teach her that...
when I don't know how?"
I can't remember what it was like...
to laugh like that.
Hello, friend. It's been a while. My goodness.
[SIGHS]
YOUNG JULIE: Can you sing me a bed night song, Daddy?
RON: "Night Flower," right?
Come here, you. Oh...
YOUNG JULIE: So I can make a wish?
RON: Well, of course you can.
What'd you wish for?
YOUNG JULIE: For you to always love me.
RON: Sweetheart.
That's nothing you'll ever have to waste a wish on.
I'll love you forever.
YOUNG JULIE: Hi, Rosie.
Let's get you ready for bed.
Rosie. Mwah.
Hi, Rosie.
So I can make a wish?
Is there a reason that you did that?
- Is there a reason you did that? - [YOUNG JULIE SCREAMS]
Look at me! You think that hurt?
[INHALES AND SIGHS]
Hey.
You need to eat something.
- Come on. - He's in bed?
- Yeah. - Okay.
He's in bed. I made you dinner.
Did all of the stuff.
Can you just tell me a little of the story?
Just whatever you've got.
I mean, I made you a moon picnic here.
- [LAUGHS] - Come on, I need a little story.
It's my favorite thing.
You made really good pancakes.
Thanks. I'm pretty proud of it.
Okay, the story is called
Pinky Tinkerbink Saves the Stars.
Love that.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Once upon a time, there was a star monster.
And it began plucking the stars from the sky, one by one.
Every time he grabs one, he puts it against his chest.
It goes into his body,
and then they glow out of his stomach,
bright, really bright.
And our heroine, this little girl called Pinky Tinkerbink...
Tinkerbink.
...is really sad.
Why is she sad?
Because the star monster
is taking all the stars out of the sky.
How is she gonna wish on anything?
So she's trying to figure out how to put all the stars
back into the sky.
And she thinks about...
"Okay, well,
light bulbs glow like the stars, right?"
So she unscrews all the light bulbs in her house,
and she throws them up one by one into the sky,
and they all fall down.
And so she thinks and she thinks,
and she realizes that diamonds, they sparkle like the stars.
So she pops all of her diamonds out of her tiara,
and she takes her slingshot,
and she just, like, slings them up into the sky one by one.
And they went... They go farther and farther
than the light bulbs.
But they can't go far enough.
And they all come raining down on her.
So Pinky thinks and she thinks and she thinks.
And then she thinks,
"Lemons. Lemons are yellow like the stars."
- [CHUCKLES] - But lemons are very heavy.
So...
She finds this leaf blower
under a pile of old leaves,
and she starts putting the lemons in her leaf blower,
and she's firing lemons out of her leaf blower,
because it's so powerful, right?
And the lemons go flying up in the sky,
and they go farther than the diamonds.
Farther than the light bulbs. But they don't go far enough.
And they come tumbling down on Pinky.
She didn't know what to do,
because there was nothing to wish on, not just for her,
but for all the little kids in the world.
All the big kids too.
Without stars, the world would be a dark and hopeless place.
So, what did she wish for?
SALZMAN: Okay, Julie, when you're ready,
I'm gonna ask for one more big push.
- JULIE: Okay, okay. - Close your eyes.
Keep pushing.
With all you got.
Harder. Keep pushing. Keep pushing.
- Keep pushing. - ETHAN: Push.
[JULIE GROANS]
[BABY CRYING]
What?
SALZMAN: You made a good one.
Is she okay? Is she okay?
- She's okay. It's okay. - Okay.
SALZMAN: That wasn't so bad, was it?
She's perfect.
She's beautiful.
She's perfect, Julie.
She's... She's so perfect.
[LAUGHING] It's over.
Mama's gonna do this for you, okay?
Yeah.
Oh, you can have that, bubs.
[EXHALES]
You know, there's nothing wrong with a bottle.
Babies.
They come into this world trusting little creatures, huh?
I remember when you were born, you...
You looked at me...
believing like I had all the answers.
And I remember thinking how brave you were...
to believe that.
Jule.
I'm sorry I didn't have all the answers.
I know, Ma.
But you do.
You always have.
That was my mistake.
Looking to you for the answers.
But you can do this, Jule.
You can.
She's gonna be okay.
You're gonna be okay.
Hell, even I'm gonna be okay.
[CHUCKLES]
Just think of all those widowers out there
just dying to remarry, huh?
I love you, Mom.
You're my baby.
- [KNOCK ON DOOR] - ETHAN: I have a big brother
who is very excited to meet his little sister.
JULIE: Hi!
This is your little sister.
It's your job to protect her, big brother.
Think you can do that?
[LAUGHS]
- Of course you can. - What do you think?
You wanna touch her?
- Wanna touch the baby? - Come here.
Say hi. Say hi.
- Ooh, come here. - There she is.
Yeah. Brought a balloon just for you.
- JULIE: Gotta get this on video. - ETHAN: Okay...
Today is October 9th, 1995.
[CHUCKLES]
And we have just welcomed a new member into our family.
This is Rachel.
- She's very happy to be here. - Hey, baby.
She was 7 pounds, 9 ounces.
- Seven pounds, 8 ounces. - Seven pounds, 8 ounces.
- She'll get there. - Born at...
9:48 p.m.
9:48.
- Can you say, "Hi, Rachel"? - [KNOCK ON DOOR]
Sorry to disturb you.
- It's bath time. - [GASPS]
It's bath time.
BOBBI: Teddy, let's go watch the bath.
- Let's go watch the bath. - Oh, yeah, go with Grandma.
- Okay. I'll put her in. - [BOBBI LAUGHS]
She's sleeping.
- She'll be okay. - She's sleeping.
Look at that baby.
[WHISPERING] Do you see that baby?
- Do you see her? - Have a nice bath, my bubba.
That's your little sister.
Isn't she something?
- Thank you. - Thank you.
- We'll be right back. - Okay.
[MOANS]
Did you take your medicine?
No. It's in my overnight bag.
- [PILLS RATTLE] - But I'm not gonna take them.
Just six weeks, that's all I need.
I mean, I did it for nine months,
so, like, what's six more weeks, right?
I promise I'm gonna take them.
- Jule... - I'm gonna. I...
I know, put the cabin pressure mask on yourself. I get it.
No, I get that, and if I'm taking a nosedive,
if I feel like I'm losing it, they will be right there.
They'll be right there, and I'll take them.
I promise. I know it's not okay, but okay?
No. No, it's not okay.
I'm not going down this road with you again.
And your promise doesn't mean anything.
I mean, you left our kid alone in a fucking ExerSaucer.
You're gonna bring this up now?
Don't make me the asshole here, okay?
For the last year, I've been walking on eggshells around you,
because I know how to keep my end of a deal.
It's not fair that you're bringing this up now.
Don't talk about fair, okay? This isn't about you!
It's not actually about you. It's about them.
Yeah.
[SNIFFLES]
[SLURPS]
Are you happy now?
I'm gonna go catch up with them.
Ethan.
I... I... I can't take it.
I can't.
You see me spiraling, that's it.
I promise.
You can check under my tongue, okay? I just can't.
[♪♪♪]
JULIE: You got that other crayon right there?
- [TEDDY WHINES] - Can I have that one?
That's really good.
That's very good coloring.
What about this color? Did you want this one?
I can give this one to you. I don't mind.
Okay.
- ETHAN: Where's the big guy? - [GASPS] Hi.
[WHISPERS] Hi. Hi, bud.
- Oh, she's sleeping. - Yeah.
[IN NORMAL VOICE] Wow. Looks amazing in here.
Is this the new stuff?
- JULIE: Some of it, yeah. - Wow.
[CHUCKLES]
Another canopy bed?
- Yeah. - Huh.
Is that the star monster?
Can you tell?
- Scary. - [WHISPERS] Bad guy.
- No stars. - [IN NORMAL VOICE] No stars.
But don't worry, I'm working on the happy stuff now.
- Yeah, show me that one. - No, not yet.
It's a surprise.
For later.
Okay.
- I got to go. - I know.
Bye.
Bye, buddy. Mwah.
- Have a good day at work. - Bye.
Everything's okay.
Okay?
- Okay. - Don't worry.
Okay, bye.
- Stop worrying. - Okay.
- Have a good day at work. - Bye.
Bye, Daddy.
[WIND CHIMES JINGLING]
[SQUEAKING]
[VEHICLE APPROACHING]
I think I see Nana coming up the road.
[GASPS] Is that Nana?
Oh, Nana's here.
Come on.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
I'm coming, Mom.
Nice and slow.
[KNOCKING AT DOOR]
Mom, I'm coming.
- Good. Good. - [DOORBELL RINGS]
Hi.
[GASPS] Hi, Teddy.
Hello, my baby boy.
Won't you say hello to Grandma?
He wanted to come back home.
You didn't say yes, did you?
Did you say yes?
Well, I didn't say no.
Be nice, Jule.
- He's the only father you got. - Yeah.
Hey, look. Come here, baby.
Here's your grandpa!
RON: Hey.
Mom says you're looking for a painter.
[COOING]
God, this is just like the view out of your old room.
[CHUCKLES]
You remember these?
Yeah, of course I do.
You know, you used to have innies just like those.
[CHUCKLES]
Probably shouldn't have her around the fumes.
RON: Come on, it's latex. There's nothing to worry about.
JULIE: Hey, Ma?
BOBBI: We're in Teddy's room. But wait!
- We're not ready yet. - Oh, okay.
Okay. It's a bird! It's a plane!
- It's Superman! - [GASPS]
- Aah! - Ah, look at you!
- Mwah. I love you. - [LAUGHING]
- You look so good. - You look great.
You look so good.
- Come here. - Mommy always loved Halloween.
We're gonna get a little change.
- What's the matter, baby? - She needs a little change.
Do you wanna help me? Do you wanna help me?
- I'm gonna help Dad paint. - Okay. Okay.
Hello, baby. Hello, my baby girl.
Yes, I love you. Are you gonna help me?
Oh, my goodness.
That's a pretty color.
I hope so.
Hey, let me set you up.
So, uh, take this...
and hold it sort of like that.
Okay, got it.
There you go. Like that.
The guy at the paint store
said these were lint-free roller covers,
but they are never lint-free roller covers,
and we don't want any lint bunnies.
Here, you take that. I'll take that.
Now, just like I taught you...
Just...
shape...
smear...
and then spread.
All right.
Perfect every time.
That's it.
There you go.
Oh, God, I'm so sorry, flower.
[SOBBING]
I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
[SNIFFLES]
[BIRDS TWEETING]
[WIND CHIMES JINGLING]
That's yours. That's for you.
[GASPS] Pop!
Wow, they're so big.
JULIE: There's none left anymore.
Mama has to go get more.
- Mama will have to go get more. - [BABY FUSSES]
Oh, it's okay. All right, come on.
Do you want some milky? You want some milky?
- Okay. - [CRIES]
Okay, all right.
You're holding on to my hair.
Okay. Okay.
Okay, baby.
[BABY CRYING CONTINUOUS]
Oh, come on, what do you need?
What do you need?
Yeah, I know. Come on, I'm trying. I'm trying.
[CRYING CONTINUOUS]
- It's okay. Shh. - [IGNITER CLICKING]
We're gonna get you your bottle.
[SHUSHING]
[CRYING CONTINUOUS]
Teddy, I'm right here, okay?
Hey, it's coming. It's coming.
[SHUSHING]
It's coming. It's okay.
What am I doing wrong, huh?
- [SHUSHING] - [BOTTLE SHAKING]
[♪♪♪]
[CRYING]
Teddy, I'm right here, okay?
Come on. Come on.
Baby girl, please, please, please, please stop crying.
[SHUSHING]
[CRYING STOPS]
You put all the rocks down already.
You put them all down already.
You can go get 'em.
Go ahead.
- ETHAN: Hey, guys. - You put all the rocks...
Hi! Look, it's Daddy! There he is.
- [IMITATES AIR WHOOSHING] - You're home so early.
- Hi. - There he is.
- How's it going? - Good.
- Yeah.
- Her room looks really good. - Great.
We picked a good color. It's so pretty.
- She's gonna like it. - Good.
All right, well, me and this guy
have very important business to take care of.
You wanna come with? We can get some pizza.
Nah, you guys have some boy time.
We'll have some girl time.
- Okay. - Yeah. Have fun.
All right.
- Uh, we'll be back in an hour. - Okay.
Bye. Bye.
Bye, guys.
[WIND CHIMES JINGLING]
We love you.
[LIPS SMACK]
JULIE: Pinky Tinkerbink and her mommy were best friends.
They went to the park together.
Baked together.
Played dress-up together.
Then one day, Pinky's mommy got sick...
[FUSSING]
...and they couldn't play together anymore.
Every night before bed,
Pinky would wish on a star for her mommy to be okay.
But little by little,
the stars were starting to disappear from the sky.
And her mommy was not getting better.
One night, Pinky looked out the window,
and all the stars were gone.
There was nothing left for her to wish upon.
This one?
Or this one?
JULIE: Pinky's magic finger began to tingle.
She thought and thought and thought and thought.
"I need to get the stars back into the sky,"
Pinky told her mommy.
"But I don't know how."
ETHAN: I think this is the winner.
What do you think?
I think we're gonna start here.
Sure, I'll be right back.
[IMITATING ROCKET EXPLODING]
[♪♪♪]
ETHAN: ...two and 15/16ths,
and go.
[LAUGHS]
Oh, backwards?
- [BABY WHIMPERING] - Okay.
Mommy loves you, baby.
There's nothing more fun than making something dirty, huh?
Oh, thank you, yes, I needed some dirt.
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[♪♪♪]
[CRIES]
[BIRDS TWEETING]
ETHAN: So Pinky defeats the star monster
and returns all the stars to the sky.
And then kids all over the world
get to wish again.
Is that right?
It's a pretty good ending.
- Really? - Yeah.
What does Pinky wish for?
Pinky?
Yeah.
This.
All she ever wanted was this.
Hi. I'm here to see Rachel Davis Nathan.
- Dad. - She just gave birth.
- Hi. - Hey.
Wait till you see her.
Hey, look who I found.
[KNOCKS]
Hi.
Congratulations, Grandpa.
Oh, congrats to you.
Here, give this to your sister.
Hold on, you.
[BABY WHIMPERS]
How are you feeling?
It's okay.
Hello.
She's very excited to meet you.
Oh.
Likewise.
Hi.
[LAUGHS]
Hi.
[WHIMPERING]
I know. I know.
Here we go.
Hi.
Thanks.
JULIE: You know, baby,
sometimes the stars are blocked by the clouds...
and sometimes they'll be outshined by the sun.
Sometimes they hide behind the moon.
Even if you don't see them, they are always there.
It's just like me.
Even if you don't see me...
my love is always with you.
[WHIMPERS]
[ENGINE TURNS OFF]
[BIRDS TWEETING DISTANTLY]
[CHURCH BELL TOLLS]
[WIND GUSTS]
[♪♪♪]
♪ Come with me ♪
♪ And you'll be ♪
♪ In a world Of pure imagination ♪
♪ Take a look and you'll see ♪
♪ Into your imagination ♪
♪ We'll begin with a spin ♪
♪ Traveling in the world Of my creation ♪
♪ What we'll see ♪
♪ Will defy explanation ♪
♪ If you want To view paradise ♪
♪ Simply look around And view it ♪
♪ Anything you want ♪
♪ Do it ♪
♪ Want to change the world? ♪
♪ There's nothing to it ♪
♪ There is no life I know ♪
♪ To compare ♪
♪ With pure imagination ♪
♪ Living here You'll be free ♪
♪ If you truly wish ♪
♪ To be ♪
[♪♪♪]