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00:00:06,522 --> 00:00:08,359
[audio logo]

2
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I don't know about you, but I'm
the kind of person that can get

3
00:00:14,204 --> 00:00:17,545
99 positive comments and
then 40,000 negative ones

4
00:00:17,579 --> 00:00:19,114
and only focus on those.

5
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Why are we like that?

6
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[music]

7
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This is The Premise.

8
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I hope you enjoy it and if not,
I'm sure you'll know what to do.

9
00:00:33,844 --> 00:00:36,282
This is, "The Commenter."

10
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[music]

11
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[birds chirping]

12
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You're exactly where
you're supposed to be.

13
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Keep your eyes closed...

14
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and focus on your breath.

15
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No other thoughts
enter your mind.

16
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[dog barking]

17
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The only sound you hear is
the sound of your breath.

18
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Breathe‐‐

19
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in for four,

20
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[wind chimes]

21
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out for four,

22
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and that's all you have to do.

23
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That's all you ever have to do.

24
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Now take your time.

25
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And when you're ready,
open your eyes.

26
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Congratulate yourself on
a meaningful practice today.

27
00:01:54,271 --> 00:01:55,407
Namaste.

28
00:01:57,444 --> 00:02:00,417
If you enjoyed your practice
please follow me on Instagram

29
00:02:00,450 --> 00:02:04,224
at craft your morning
with a sip of yoga.

30
00:02:04,258 --> 00:02:04,826
[camera sound]

31
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Bang bang.

32
00:02:06,596 --> 00:02:07,865
[laughs]

33
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Hey, what are you doing?

34
00:02:09,636 --> 00:02:11,505
I'm teaching Bear to play dead.

35
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Bang, bang.

36
00:02:16,282 --> 00:02:18,620
Yay. Good Bear!

37
00:02:18,654 --> 00:02:19,956
With bang bang, Bear.

38
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[laughs]

39
00:02:22,294 --> 00:02:23,363
Seriously?

40
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Why are steel‐cut oats
healthier than other oats?

41
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I mean, how do
the oats even know

42
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what they're being cut with?

43
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I don't know,
but I think you're funny.

44
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[chuckles]

45
00:02:34,552 --> 00:02:36,522
But for real,
what is the difference?

46
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Mm‐hmm.

47
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What's this?

48
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[chuckles]

49
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Steel‐cut toast.

50
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Because you are‐‐

51
00:02:48,513 --> 00:02:51,787
Miss Generational Inspiration
and you deserve to be

52
00:02:52,020 --> 00:02:53,824
celebrating yourself
and who you are.

53
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‐ No, no, no.
‐ Absolutely...

54
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‐ Every single day.
‐ I'm so gross and sweaty now.

55
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Oh, it's not even a real award.

56
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They just gave it
to me for fundraising.

57
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Shhh...

58
00:03:01,907 --> 00:03:03,710
Can't I just love you?

59
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Just listen to your toast,
you are the fucking best.

60
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[laughs]

61
00:03:11,927 --> 00:03:13,964
I will see you tonight
with the girls, okay?

62
00:03:13,997 --> 00:03:14,799
Okay.

63
00:03:14,833 --> 00:03:17,805
You go change some lives.

64
00:03:18,306 --> 00:03:19,408
Have a good day.

65
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Bye. I love you.

66
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Je t'aime...

67
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All right, listen up ladies.

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I want you to close
your eyes because

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I'm about to blow your minds.

70
00:03:33,604 --> 00:03:36,242
Now keep your eyes closed...

71
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[laughs]

72
00:03:38,179 --> 00:03:41,418
and I want you to try
and scare yourself.

73
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Come on try.

74
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[chuckles]

75
00:03:46,596 --> 00:03:49,501
See, being scared of
yourself makes no sense.

76
00:03:49,535 --> 00:03:52,608
You just have to listen
to your inner voice.

77
00:03:53,042 --> 00:03:55,447
Now, when you write
this week's exercise,

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I want you to remember that

79
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there is no such thing
as perfect.

80
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There is only perfectly you.

81
00:04:02,527 --> 00:04:04,566
Let's show our appreciation.

82
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Huh?!

83
00:04:05,668 --> 00:04:08,774
We show! (clap) our! (clap)
great appreciation!

84
00:04:08,807 --> 00:04:12,380
for the heroes! (clap) who help!
our strength in education!

85
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[camera sound]

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[applause]

87
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[music]

88
00:04:19,061 --> 00:04:21,666
[notification sounds]

89
00:04:38,901 --> 00:04:39,702
To Cleo.

90
00:04:39,903 --> 00:04:41,539
[applause]

91
00:04:42,140 --> 00:04:44,344
Also, to Naomi for
getting into her

92
00:04:44,378 --> 00:04:46,482
first choice medical school.

93
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‐ Come on.
‐ Killing it!

94
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[applause]

95
00:04:49,923 --> 00:04:52,828
To Beth who spent all last
weekend giving checkups

96
00:04:52,862 --> 00:04:54,832
to rescue dogs, pro bono.

97
00:04:55,433 --> 00:04:57,037
[laughter]

98
00:04:57,504 --> 00:05:01,512
But, most importantly to my
beautiful girlfriend Allegra or

99
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shall I say,
"Miss Generational Inspiration."

100
00:05:04,853 --> 00:05:06,623
[applause]

101
00:05:07,592 --> 00:05:10,029
Also, I got us a table at the
Arts Alliance gala,

102
00:05:10,063 --> 00:05:13,369
so we could go watch
Allegra accept her award.

103
00:05:14,471 --> 00:05:16,508
Who would I be
without you guys?

104
00:05:16,542 --> 00:05:17,645
[laughter]

105
00:05:17,678 --> 00:05:18,547
Right.

106
00:05:18,580 --> 00:05:19,582
Okay, hang on.

107
00:05:19,616 --> 00:05:20,918
Smile like you mean it.

108
00:05:22,889 --> 00:05:23,824
[camera sound]

109
00:05:23,857 --> 00:05:25,059
[laughter]

110
00:05:25,093 --> 00:05:26,730
Oh, I look terrible.

111
00:05:26,930 --> 00:05:27,965
You look great.

112
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[chuckles]

113
00:05:29,101 --> 00:05:30,604
I really want to go to the‐‐

114
00:05:30,638 --> 00:05:33,042
So, it's at the
New Orleans Jazz Museum.

115
00:05:33,075 --> 00:05:35,848
It's like creative
black tie or whatever,

116
00:05:35,881 --> 00:05:39,689
so no need to dress,
you know, any fancier.

117
00:05:39,722 --> 00:05:40,724
Okay, cool.

118
00:05:41,492 --> 00:05:44,464
[music]

119
00:05:50,009 --> 00:05:51,746
Hello.

120
00:05:53,049 --> 00:05:54,051
Ah, I'm so sorry.

121
00:05:54,084 --> 00:05:54,852
What?

122
00:05:54,886 --> 00:05:55,988
Oh, what.

123
00:05:56,623 --> 00:05:58,459
[crosstalk]

124
00:05:58,727 --> 00:06:00,731
We need to go...

125
00:06:00,764 --> 00:06:01,600
Avec toi?

126
00:06:01,633 --> 00:06:02,768
Where?

127
00:06:03,469 --> 00:06:05,874
[speaking French]

128
00:06:05,908 --> 00:06:07,177
[television]
Take it easy man, okay?

129
00:06:07,210 --> 00:06:11,653
What are you doing, that is not
his blood, that's so obvious.

130
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You're going to have to go
back to detective school

131
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young man.

132
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It's so dumb.

133
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Come on.

134
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What's happening?

135
00:06:19,802 --> 00:06:22,173
She's going to get it but her
partner is slowing her down,

136
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that's really annoying.

137
00:06:24,679 --> 00:06:26,716
What are you doing?

138
00:06:27,050 --> 00:06:28,854
Oh, no, come on.

139
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So, you saw it?

140
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Yes.

141
00:06:31,225 --> 00:06:33,062
Who do you think it is?

142
00:06:33,095 --> 00:06:34,197
Who cares, just block them.

143
00:06:34,231 --> 00:06:35,668
No, you're not supposed
to block them,

144
00:06:35,701 --> 00:06:37,738
that just stirs them up.

145
00:06:37,772 --> 00:06:39,642
Just ignore it then.

146
00:06:41,111 --> 00:06:43,550
You have the best smile.

147
00:06:44,752 --> 00:06:46,723
Sometimes I worry it's
like a grownup version

148
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of a school photo.

149
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[chuckles]

150
00:06:50,129 --> 00:06:51,700
It's perfect.

151
00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:54,071
I love that it's
a little crooked.

152
00:06:54,104 --> 00:06:55,540
It's my favorite.

153
00:06:55,574 --> 00:06:58,680
I hate that there are
these faceless weirdos on

154
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the internet that try to
ruin people's happiness.

155
00:07:03,022 --> 00:07:06,930
It's crazy, you have like 99
beautiful, positive comments

156
00:07:06,963 --> 00:07:10,871
and you choose to focus
on the one negative one.

157
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The one that's like,
stupid baloney.

158
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Don't do it.

159
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Thank you.

160
00:07:17,150 --> 00:07:18,687
I will protect you.

161
00:07:22,060 --> 00:07:23,229
Check my email.

162
00:07:23,262 --> 00:07:26,970
You have 22 unread
messages from Dermstore.

163
00:07:27,003 --> 00:07:29,007
Who gave you permission
to be this beautiful?

164
00:07:29,041 --> 00:07:29,942
Delete.

165
00:07:29,976 --> 00:07:33,717
From Ayanna M.,
I love all these ideas.

166
00:07:34,552 --> 00:07:35,888
Mark as unread.

167
00:07:37,858 --> 00:07:39,528
Open those new
messages for me.

168
00:07:39,762 --> 00:07:41,131
New text from Sarah,

169
00:07:41,165 --> 00:07:43,970
meeting Tinder girl after
dinner, eyes emoji.

170
00:07:44,171 --> 00:07:46,743
Sarah has changed
the name of the group to,

171
00:07:46,776 --> 00:07:49,147
excuse me, ma'am,
this is a Whataburger.

172
00:07:49,181 --> 00:07:50,183
[chuckles]

173
00:07:53,289 --> 00:07:54,926
Check those new comments.

174
00:07:55,259 --> 00:07:59,802
New comment from C101011,
posing with little black kids

175
00:07:59,836 --> 00:08:01,171
so everyone knows I'm a good‐‐

176
00:08:01,573 --> 00:08:02,708
Am I doing this right?

177
00:08:04,979 --> 00:08:08,152
These hashtags, is she
teaching them to write,

178
00:08:08,185 --> 00:08:09,589
or are they teaching her?

179
00:08:09,956 --> 00:08:11,793
[music]

180
00:08:19,642 --> 00:08:20,644
Hi.

181
00:08:21,813 --> 00:08:23,617
Excuse me, we have an
open‐door policy in this house.

182
00:08:23,650 --> 00:08:25,119
I just need one second, sorry.

183
00:08:25,153 --> 00:08:26,689
[music]

184
00:08:29,127 --> 00:08:30,163
[chuckles]

185
00:08:40,216 --> 00:08:41,753
That's a beautiful smile.

186
00:08:41,786 --> 00:08:44,324
You have a beautiful smile,
plus the light, oops...

187
00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:46,763
I like that one
from your account.

188
00:08:46,796 --> 00:08:48,867
‐ How do I unlike it?
‐ Oh, just tap it again.

189
00:08:50,403 --> 00:08:53,109
Isn't this supposed to be how
I feel about the comments,

190
00:08:53,142 --> 00:08:54,779
not whether you think
the comments

191
00:08:54,812 --> 00:08:55,848
are objectively right?

192
00:08:56,181 --> 00:08:58,052
How do you feel
about the comments?

193
00:08:58,252 --> 00:08:59,889
That they are objectively right.

194
00:08:59,922 --> 00:09:00,591
[chuckles]

195
00:09:00,624 --> 00:09:02,227
That's a thought, not a feeling.

196
00:09:02,260 --> 00:09:04,097
I feel...

197
00:09:04,131 --> 00:09:04,899
Um...

198
00:09:07,370 --> 00:09:08,139
seen‐‐

199
00:09:09,241 --> 00:09:10,343
and respected.

200
00:09:11,478 --> 00:09:14,652
You feel respected by these
comments, these comments?

201
00:09:14,886 --> 00:09:16,890
I feel like I'm being
taken seriously, yes.

202
00:09:18,292 --> 00:09:20,096
You have a loving partner.

203
00:09:20,129 --> 00:09:23,102
You have an incredible
supportive group of friends.

204
00:09:23,135 --> 00:09:26,241
You have all these students
that love and adore you,

205
00:09:26,709 --> 00:09:29,281
yet you feel that a random
stranger on the internet

206
00:09:29,314 --> 00:09:32,788
is the one person telling you
the truth about yourself?

207
00:09:33,690 --> 00:09:34,324
Yeah.

208
00:09:35,426 --> 00:09:38,199
Do you think you might
be too close to all of this?

209
00:09:38,232 --> 00:09:39,602
Sure, of course.

210
00:09:41,806 --> 00:09:42,875
But they're not.

211
00:09:44,444 --> 00:09:45,814
They're far from it, right?

212
00:09:45,848 --> 00:09:46,215
If they don't know me?

213
00:09:46,683 --> 00:09:47,751
Exactly.

214
00:09:47,785 --> 00:09:53,162
So, I'm too close to it and
they're too far from it.

215
00:09:53,195 --> 00:09:54,097
Correct.

216
00:09:54,966 --> 00:09:57,203
So, who am I supposed
to listen to?

217
00:09:57,237 --> 00:09:59,407
You listen to your heart.

218
00:09:59,876 --> 00:10:01,980
I am listening to my heart
but when I tell you

219
00:10:02,013 --> 00:10:03,182
what my heart is saying,

220
00:10:03,215 --> 00:10:04,785
you're telling me
that I'm wrong.

221
00:10:04,819 --> 00:10:05,821
[laughs]

222
00:10:05,854 --> 00:10:08,359
You don't know the intentions
of this source.

223
00:10:08,392 --> 00:10:09,862
Well, what if they're good?

224
00:10:09,896 --> 00:10:12,033
What if they're bad and
they're still right?

225
00:10:12,066 --> 00:10:14,104
People listen to
all kinds of things.

226
00:10:14,137 --> 00:10:16,776
Religion, horoscopes,
tarot cards.

227
00:10:16,809 --> 00:10:18,078
Nobody judges them.

228
00:10:18,112 --> 00:10:19,214
This speaks to me.

229
00:10:19,247 --> 00:10:20,817
Why can't I listen to it?

230
00:10:21,853 --> 00:10:24,224
I know you feel
you're struggling

231
00:10:25,293 --> 00:10:27,197
but you're doing
wonderful work here.

232
00:10:27,430 --> 00:10:29,769
and you're exactly
where you should be.

233
00:10:33,108 --> 00:10:34,812
Can I have my
phone back, please?

234
00:10:34,846 --> 00:10:37,217
[music]

235
00:11:18,432 --> 00:11:19,200
Hey!

236
00:11:19,869 --> 00:11:21,505
Ooh, wow, hello.

237
00:11:21,538 --> 00:11:24,077
Look at this runway model.

238
00:11:24,277 --> 00:11:25,413
It's not too much?

239
00:11:25,446 --> 00:11:26,983
No, we love.

240
00:11:27,016 --> 00:11:28,085
No, no, never.

241
00:11:28,118 --> 00:11:28,954
You look good.

242
00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,460
What would I do
without you guys?

243
00:11:32,493 --> 00:11:33,295
Hi.

244
00:11:33,329 --> 00:11:34,331
Ah, girl.

245
00:11:35,366 --> 00:11:36,836
Do you really like it?

246
00:11:38,038 --> 00:11:41,245
Listen, you were perfect and
now, you're just perfecter.

247
00:11:41,846 --> 00:11:42,313
Look at her.

248
00:11:42,347 --> 00:11:43,850
Allegra 2.0.

249
00:11:43,883 --> 00:11:45,253
That's my girl.

250
00:11:45,486 --> 00:11:46,421
Look at her.

251
00:11:47,056 --> 00:11:48,058
That's mine.

252
00:11:50,931 --> 00:11:51,866
Oh, Okay.

253
00:12:05,994 --> 00:12:06,963
What?

254
00:12:07,463 --> 00:12:08,399
This...

255
00:12:08,933 --> 00:12:10,169
This sleaze tilt.

256
00:12:10,536 --> 00:12:12,875
If you want private
phone time, no problem.

257
00:12:12,908 --> 00:12:14,277
You just go like this.

258
00:12:14,311 --> 00:12:15,479
This is legit.

259
00:12:15,513 --> 00:12:16,983
This is sleazy.

260
00:12:18,152 --> 00:12:19,487
Oh, great.

261
00:12:19,521 --> 00:12:21,325
Legit. Valid.

262
00:12:23,529 --> 00:12:24,531
[chuckles].

263
00:12:27,470 --> 00:12:31,311
Hey, I really want to do this
thing together that I read.

264
00:12:31,345 --> 00:12:32,480
On Goop?

265
00:12:32,513 --> 00:12:33,850
Not on Goop.

266
00:12:34,284 --> 00:12:35,519
Something like Goop.

267
00:12:36,388 --> 00:12:39,461
It's called a burn ceremony
where you write down

268
00:12:39,494 --> 00:12:42,233
all your fears and everything
you want to let go of and

269
00:12:42,266 --> 00:12:44,537
then you burn it in
a fire together and

270
00:12:44,572 --> 00:12:46,041
let go of everything.

271
00:12:46,909 --> 00:12:48,512
What if I don't want to
burn my fears?

272
00:12:49,214 --> 00:12:49,982
Why?

273
00:12:51,919 --> 00:12:52,855
Did I only choose my job

274
00:12:52,888 --> 00:12:55,059
because I want to seem
like a good person?

275
00:12:56,461 --> 00:12:58,867
Where is this coming from?

276
00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:00,236
I don't know.

277
00:13:01,338 --> 00:13:03,075
Is this that troll talking?

278
00:13:03,108 --> 00:13:04,912
Are you still reading that shit?

279
00:13:05,647 --> 00:13:10,356
Allegra, you're literally
about to get an award.

280
00:13:10,590 --> 00:13:12,126
Miss Generational Inspiration.

281
00:13:12,160 --> 00:13:12,995
Yeah‐‐

282
00:13:14,230 --> 00:13:15,901
What is that even?

283
00:13:15,934 --> 00:13:17,336
Were there other nominees?

284
00:13:17,370 --> 00:13:18,873
Did I lose it last year?

285
00:13:18,907 --> 00:13:21,311
Why do you let this
voice get into your head?

286
00:13:22,380 --> 00:13:24,952
Your life is amazing.

287
00:13:24,985 --> 00:13:26,556
Everything is going so great.

288
00:13:26,589 --> 00:13:28,359
They're obviously just jealous.

289
00:13:30,429 --> 00:13:31,298
I know.

290
00:13:32,568 --> 00:13:33,502
I know.

291
00:13:33,535 --> 00:13:35,874
[music]

292
00:13:48,298 --> 00:13:51,271
Hey, I don't know who you are
and why you're writing to me but

293
00:13:51,304 --> 00:13:54,344
I wanted to reach out and say,
you're clearly in pain and

294
00:13:54,377 --> 00:13:55,413
contrary to your beliefs,

295
00:13:55,446 --> 00:13:58,385
I am a very happy person
with a very fulfilling and

296
00:13:58,419 --> 00:14:03,095
satisfying life and I hope
whatever you're looking for,

297
00:14:03,128 --> 00:14:04,397
you find it.

298
00:14:07,704 --> 00:14:09,975
[background music]

299
00:14:53,162 --> 00:14:54,965
I truly feel sorry for you.

300
00:14:56,134 --> 00:14:59,174
You feel sorry for yourself,
as you should.

301
00:15:02,648 --> 00:15:04,451
Why are you obsessed
with me?

302
00:15:07,256 --> 00:15:09,093
Why are you obsessed
with me?

303
00:15:12,099 --> 00:15:14,939
You want me to seriously
engage with that question?

304
00:15:17,210 --> 00:15:19,113
I doubt you're capable of it.

305
00:15:20,416 --> 00:15:23,723
Obviously, it's because
I'm seeking validation.

306
00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:27,564
You get validation everywhere.

307
00:15:27,598 --> 00:15:29,367
You're not seeking
that from me.

308
00:15:29,668 --> 00:15:34,310
Think harder, if you can do it,
which I don't know if you can.

309
00:15:40,657 --> 00:15:44,430
Okay, I'm seeking an escape
from mindless validation.

310
00:15:45,634 --> 00:15:47,270
Oh, all right.

311
00:15:47,303 --> 00:15:49,975
That's the intelligent Allegra
I wanted to talk to.

312
00:15:51,712 --> 00:15:53,315
Your life still sucks though.

313
00:15:55,519 --> 00:15:57,423
You're all doing perfect.

314
00:15:58,358 --> 00:16:00,095
You can do better than that.

315
00:16:00,630 --> 00:16:05,039
Breathe and release anything
that does not serve you.

316
00:16:05,640 --> 00:16:08,278
I'm trying to see if I actually
exist underneath

317
00:16:08,312 --> 00:16:09,447
all this validation.

318
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:11,652
You're out of mind,
by yourself.

319
00:16:11,686 --> 00:16:12,788
Oh, see?

320
00:16:12,821 --> 00:16:15,794
You're so much smarter
when you're actually challenged.

321
00:16:15,827 --> 00:16:18,432
Self‐love isn't selfish,
it's important.

322
00:16:18,465 --> 00:16:19,500
You know what?

323
00:16:19,534 --> 00:16:21,404
Validation isn't a bad thing.

324
00:16:21,438 --> 00:16:24,143
No one would ever be able
to do anything worthwhile

325
00:16:24,177 --> 00:16:26,281
without encouragement
and support.

326
00:16:27,350 --> 00:16:29,420
People would kill for
friends like these,

327
00:16:29,454 --> 00:16:33,195
for a partner like this,
for a support system like this.

328
00:16:34,565 --> 00:16:36,501
Sit, sit, sit.

329
00:16:36,534 --> 00:16:38,272
Why do you care about me?

330
00:16:38,305 --> 00:16:39,775
Are you someone I know?

331
00:16:39,808 --> 00:16:41,077
I don't care.

332
00:16:41,111 --> 00:16:42,548
It's easy to be honest when

333
00:16:42,581 --> 00:16:44,183
you don't care about somebody.

334
00:16:44,217 --> 00:16:47,223
And you know, unless you abandon
your need for validation,

335
00:16:47,256 --> 00:16:49,728
you will never become who
you're supposed to become.

336
00:16:49,762 --> 00:16:52,333
Allegra, we have
a little trick for you.

337
00:16:52,366 --> 00:16:55,072
You will never be free to
be who you want to be,

338
00:16:55,105 --> 00:16:56,207
who you could be.

339
00:16:57,143 --> 00:16:58,646
You could be saying
this to anyone.

340
00:16:59,347 --> 00:17:02,420
I was bored and went
back on all your posts,

341
00:17:02,621 --> 00:17:04,725
way back when you
wanted to be a writer.

342
00:17:05,225 --> 00:17:06,796
What happened to that, Allegra?

343
00:17:07,296 --> 00:17:09,367
Before you just wrote, "#Goals"

344
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:12,173
you actually had goals and
wrote in full sentences.

345
00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:13,275
Okay.

346
00:17:13,308 --> 00:17:15,112
Every word you write,
ask yourself,

347
00:17:15,145 --> 00:17:16,014
"Am I full of shit?

348
00:17:16,047 --> 00:17:18,285
Do I even have an
inner voice or am I just

349
00:17:18,318 --> 00:17:20,624
an echo chamber for
other empty people?"

350
00:17:20,657 --> 00:17:23,830
all of us looking for as
many people as possible to say

351
00:17:23,863 --> 00:17:25,834
something nice about
us before we die.

352
00:17:30,677 --> 00:17:33,549
Who are you posting for
anyway, before I came along?

353
00:17:34,585 --> 00:17:36,288
I wasn't posting for anyone.

354
00:17:37,290 --> 00:17:39,093
Everybody posts for somebody,

355
00:17:39,394 --> 00:17:41,131
consciously or unconsciously.

356
00:17:41,331 --> 00:17:42,801
There's someone
you hope sees it.

357
00:17:44,537 --> 00:17:46,541
You can't post without
picturing someone.

358
00:17:47,243 --> 00:17:48,579
It's like coming.

359
00:17:48,613 --> 00:17:51,484
[background music]

360
00:17:58,265 --> 00:18:00,369
You know,
what's fucked up is that

361
00:18:00,402 --> 00:18:02,139
I read all these
self‐help books.

362
00:18:02,173 --> 00:18:02,941
That is fucked up.

363
00:18:02,975 --> 00:18:04,477
That's wonderful,
you're searching.

364
00:18:04,510 --> 00:18:06,649
No, what's fucked up
is even they'll tell you

365
00:18:06,682 --> 00:18:07,684
that you're already great.

366
00:18:07,718 --> 00:18:11,157
Believing in yourself
is an essential part‐‐

367
00:18:11,391 --> 00:18:14,163
Shouldn't there be two sections
in the bookstore, like,

368
00:18:14,598 --> 00:18:16,702
"How To Be A Badass Bitch"
and the sequel is‐‐

369
00:18:16,736 --> 00:18:18,305
"You Are A Badass Bitch".

370
00:18:18,338 --> 00:18:19,575
You're funny.

371
00:18:19,608 --> 00:18:21,344
Anyone ever tell
you you're funny?

372
00:18:21,378 --> 00:18:22,748
[chuckles]

373
00:18:22,781 --> 00:18:24,517
Everyone tells me everything.

374
00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:28,793
Sometimes you caption your
photos like you're deathly

375
00:18:28,826 --> 00:18:31,164
afraid someone's going
to tell you're pathetic.

376
00:18:31,197 --> 00:18:33,502
Did you realize you're not
fooling anyone when you

377
00:18:33,535 --> 00:18:35,305
pose in yoga gear,
full makeup, and‐‐

378
00:18:35,339 --> 00:18:37,176
The fact that you
captioned a selfie,

379
00:18:37,209 --> 00:18:39,480
"I stand with my AAPI
brothers and sisters,"

380
00:18:39,514 --> 00:18:40,884
kind of makes me
think you don't have

381
00:18:40,917 --> 00:18:41,986
any AAPI brothers and sisters.

382
00:18:42,019 --> 00:18:43,790
Everyone's doing that
above angle that's supposed

383
00:18:43,823 --> 00:18:44,958
to be flattering‐‐

384
00:18:44,992 --> 00:18:48,198
And, every time you talk about
destroying capitalism you

385
00:18:48,231 --> 00:18:49,935
usually buy something
online later that day.

386
00:18:49,968 --> 00:18:52,273
Why were you a better
writer on LiveJournal at 16

387
00:18:52,306 --> 00:18:53,241
than you are now?

388
00:18:54,978 --> 00:18:56,615
See you Monday, Ms. Allegra.

389
00:19:01,625 --> 00:19:03,830
You made me ask
questions I'd never asked,

390
00:19:03,863 --> 00:19:05,900
pointed out things
no one had told me.

391
00:19:05,934 --> 00:19:08,673
How come no one told me
any of these things before,

392
00:19:08,706 --> 00:19:10,376
because they couldn't
see them or

393
00:19:10,409 --> 00:19:11,746
because they couldn't say them?

394
00:19:11,779 --> 00:19:12,748
Which is worse?

395
00:19:12,781 --> 00:19:15,386
Hey, Meredith just texted and
said you quit.

396
00:19:15,419 --> 00:19:17,991
It's so weird that it's you
who's doing this to me.

397
00:19:18,024 --> 00:19:21,364
Everyone would think I'm crazy
listening to some hater online.

398
00:19:21,632 --> 00:19:24,404
I don't think you'd be listening
to me unless you had to.

399
00:19:24,437 --> 00:19:25,406
What do you mean?

400
00:19:25,439 --> 00:19:27,677
You see someone rooting
around in the trash,

401
00:19:27,711 --> 00:19:29,648
you don't ask, "What are
you looking for?"

402
00:19:29,681 --> 00:19:31,418
You ask, "What did you lose?"

403
00:19:33,589 --> 00:19:34,591
Mmm‐‐ toss.

404
00:19:37,329 --> 00:19:38,198
Toss.

405
00:19:43,542 --> 00:19:44,578
Donate?

406
00:19:45,647 --> 00:19:47,483
So someone else
can throw it out?

407
00:19:52,359 --> 00:19:54,998
Oh, I actually like
that transparent bag.

408
00:19:55,032 --> 00:19:56,267
Yeah, that's legit.

409
00:19:56,501 --> 00:19:57,704
I have the same one.

410
00:20:07,356 --> 00:20:09,494
[music]

411
00:20:20,850 --> 00:20:23,756
My love,
the first time I met you,

412
00:20:23,790 --> 00:20:24,591
the first‐‐

413
00:20:28,465 --> 00:20:30,435
the first time
I heard you speak,

414
00:20:31,004 --> 00:20:33,542
I felt like I was hearing
music for the first time.

415
00:20:33,576 --> 00:20:36,281
Like the way it feels
when you're 12 and

416
00:20:36,782 --> 00:20:40,322
you hear a song that instantly
makes you into an adult.

417
00:20:40,557 --> 00:20:43,028
Have we been watching
Garden State?

418
00:20:43,061 --> 00:20:45,767
That cuts straight through
everything else

419
00:20:46,334 --> 00:20:47,503
right to your heart.

420
00:20:47,871 --> 00:20:50,577
That one song that shows
you who you are and

421
00:20:50,610 --> 00:20:51,679
what you want.

422
00:20:55,419 --> 00:20:56,622
You know what's funny?

423
00:20:58,626 --> 00:20:59,895
You know what's funny?

424
00:21:01,030 --> 00:21:03,034
Hey, you know what's funny?

425
00:21:05,907 --> 00:21:07,476
You know what's funny?

426
00:21:09,715 --> 00:21:11,017
You know what's funny?

427
00:21:16,762 --> 00:21:18,966
[music]

428
00:21:33,395 --> 00:21:34,598
It's a loser.

429
00:21:34,898 --> 00:21:35,733
Who?

430
00:21:37,002 --> 00:21:38,338
You know who?

431
00:21:39,373 --> 00:21:41,946
It's some 300‐pound loser,
sorry to fat shame,

432
00:21:41,979 --> 00:21:43,381
in their mother's basement.

433
00:21:43,415 --> 00:21:44,751
Sorry to income shame.

434
00:21:44,785 --> 00:21:46,555
Gross, ugly, random, like‐‐

435
00:21:47,489 --> 00:21:48,626
No, she isn't.

436
00:21:49,895 --> 00:21:51,364
Male loser.

437
00:21:51,397 --> 00:21:52,567
What the fuck?

438
00:21:53,001 --> 00:21:55,607
Who do you think is sick
in the head enough

439
00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:57,142
to do something like this?

440
00:21:57,176 --> 00:21:58,746
Don't insult her.

441
00:22:00,717 --> 00:22:01,685
What?

442
00:22:03,823 --> 00:22:04,892
So what?

443
00:22:04,925 --> 00:22:08,733
You think it's some super hot,
cool, sexy, awesome,

444
00:22:08,766 --> 00:22:10,570
smart lesbian, and then what?

445
00:22:10,603 --> 00:22:12,874
You're going to move in
together and have babies?

446
00:22:14,611 --> 00:22:15,445
Seriously?

447
00:22:17,918 --> 00:22:18,953
What if she's straight?

448
00:22:18,986 --> 00:22:20,055
It's not about that.

449
00:22:20,088 --> 00:22:21,792
It's about being
taken seriously.

450
00:22:21,825 --> 00:22:23,161
It's about being challenged.

451
00:22:23,194 --> 00:22:24,665
It's about being understood.

452
00:22:24,698 --> 00:22:27,036
It's about being told
the truth, finally.

453
00:22:28,806 --> 00:22:29,875
By a stranger?

454
00:22:29,908 --> 00:22:30,743
Yes.

455
00:22:32,914 --> 00:22:34,016
That's fucked up.

456
00:22:34,050 --> 00:22:36,889
What's fucked up is that
it had to be a stranger, Beth.

457
00:22:37,891 --> 00:22:39,561
All you do is gas me up.

458
00:22:39,595 --> 00:22:41,431
You just tell me
how perfect I am.

459
00:22:41,464 --> 00:22:43,535
Is that all you're capable of,

460
00:22:43,569 --> 00:22:45,573
or is that how honest
you can be, which?

461
00:22:47,009 --> 00:22:48,779
There's a lot
I could say right now.

462
00:22:48,813 --> 00:22:49,982
Oh, baby.

463
00:22:50,015 --> 00:22:51,517
Lay it on me.

464
00:22:51,719 --> 00:22:53,756
Tell me something
mean and true.

465
00:22:53,789 --> 00:22:54,758
Try.

466
00:22:55,960 --> 00:22:58,733
You're not as smart
as you think you are.

467
00:22:58,766 --> 00:23:01,639
You have like
this intellectual style.

468
00:23:02,607 --> 00:23:03,541
Yeah, you're clever.

469
00:23:03,576 --> 00:23:05,479
You're just‐‐ What?

470
00:23:05,813 --> 00:23:06,915
So sorry.

471
00:23:06,949 --> 00:23:09,888
It's just like watching
a little girl play dress‐up.

472
00:23:12,794 --> 00:23:13,963
I love you so much.

473
00:23:15,098 --> 00:23:17,169
I love you so fucking much.

474
00:23:18,606 --> 00:23:21,210
I wish I could tell you what
was it like to make you happy,

475
00:23:21,244 --> 00:23:22,479
but it's not.

476
00:23:23,014 --> 00:23:24,116
I can't help it.

477
00:23:25,586 --> 00:23:27,156
I think you're the best.

478
00:23:27,189 --> 00:23:31,431
I think you're the smartest,
the most beautiful,

479
00:23:32,166 --> 00:23:34,671
the most exquisite person.

480
00:23:36,174 --> 00:23:38,011
You're one in a million.

481
00:23:38,044 --> 00:23:39,948
You're one in like 10 billion.

482
00:23:42,687 --> 00:23:44,858
You want to know how
many times I've played out

483
00:23:44,891 --> 00:23:46,862
you leaving me for
someone better than me?

484
00:23:47,196 --> 00:23:48,064
All the time.

485
00:23:48,531 --> 00:23:50,469
But for someone who hates you?

486
00:23:51,104 --> 00:23:52,239
That's fucked up.

487
00:23:52,974 --> 00:23:55,913
You can feel however
you want about me.

488
00:23:56,882 --> 00:24:00,723
Don't treat my love like
this because that's unfair.

489
00:24:01,558 --> 00:24:04,965
Please just stop punishing
me for loving you.

490
00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:07,704
I can't help it.

491
00:24:08,572 --> 00:24:09,641
What am I doing?

492
00:24:12,647 --> 00:24:14,618
Hey, hey, hey, come here.

493
00:24:17,691 --> 00:24:18,726
I'm sorry.

494
00:24:19,928 --> 00:24:20,997
I'm so sorry.

495
00:24:35,727 --> 00:24:37,897
Hey, you are the best.

496
00:24:45,145 --> 00:24:46,214
It's fine.

497
00:24:46,815 --> 00:24:48,051
No, it's a little burnt.

498
00:24:48,084 --> 00:24:51,825
I like it when it's more golden
and then it goes like this.

499
00:24:54,363 --> 00:24:58,773
Okay, I am letting go of
my guilt over the animals of

500
00:24:58,806 --> 00:25:01,912
Hurricane Laura that
I couldn't save.

501
00:25:03,181 --> 00:25:07,557
I am letting go of my need
for external‐‐

502
00:25:08,158 --> 00:25:09,226
validation.

503
00:25:15,305 --> 00:25:19,080
I am letting go of my little
OCD around the house,

504
00:25:19,113 --> 00:25:20,082
[laughter]

505
00:25:20,115 --> 00:25:22,854
no offense to anyone
who has OCD, of course.

506
00:25:23,923 --> 00:25:28,164
I am letting go of the fear...

507
00:25:28,966 --> 00:25:30,268
that there is...

508
00:25:31,104 --> 00:25:35,212
someone I should be or
something I should be doing

509
00:25:35,245 --> 00:25:39,588
that isn't in the here and now.

510
00:25:45,232 --> 00:25:46,167
Yes!

511
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:47,336
[laughter]

512
00:25:48,939 --> 00:25:50,008
Um...

513
00:25:53,248 --> 00:25:55,920
[background music]

514
00:25:55,953 --> 00:25:57,624
I want to give you something.

515
00:26:05,706 --> 00:26:06,975
What is this?

516
00:26:12,821 --> 00:26:14,791
It's the commentor...

517
00:26:14,825 --> 00:26:15,358
Um...

518
00:26:15,392 --> 00:26:16,394
After I blocked them,

519
00:26:16,427 --> 00:26:19,801
I hired this shady hacker
to track them down and

520
00:26:19,835 --> 00:26:21,738
find where they were
logging in from.

521
00:26:21,772 --> 00:26:23,709
So, that's their location.

522
00:26:24,778 --> 00:26:28,017
Just a random person in
a random office building

523
00:26:28,051 --> 00:26:29,253
in Dallas.

524
00:26:31,123 --> 00:26:32,259
[chuckles]

525
00:26:34,330 --> 00:26:35,933
You got them blocked?

526
00:26:37,402 --> 00:26:38,338
Yeah.

527
00:26:41,477 --> 00:26:42,947
You did that for me?

528
00:26:42,981 --> 00:26:43,849
Of course.

529
00:26:44,718 --> 00:26:46,187
I'll do anything for you.

530
00:26:50,863 --> 00:26:52,399
[music]

531
00:26:56,909 --> 00:26:59,814
[notification sounds]

532
00:27:05,292 --> 00:27:07,095
Smart people make
you feel smart,

533
00:27:07,362 --> 00:27:09,701
crazy people
make you feel crazy.

534
00:27:10,435 --> 00:27:12,874
I need to know who you
are to know who I am.

535
00:27:13,943 --> 00:27:16,080
[background music]

536
00:27:51,818 --> 00:27:54,390
Her smile is as
fake as her life.

537
00:27:54,791 --> 00:27:57,195
Her smile is as
fake as her life.

538
00:28:01,337 --> 00:28:03,909
Her smile is as
fake as her life.

539
00:28:15,231 --> 00:28:17,971
[music ends]

540
00:28:22,279 --> 00:28:24,149
Hey, is there a bathroom?

541
00:28:35,372 --> 00:28:36,240
[screams]

542
00:28:36,507 --> 00:28:38,244
I knew it, I knew it.

543
00:28:38,278 --> 00:28:40,081
I knew it would be worth it.

544
00:28:40,115 --> 00:28:41,551
I knew I would find
you here and

545
00:28:41,585 --> 00:28:44,323
I knew you weren't just
a loser in a basement.

546
00:28:46,527 --> 00:28:48,498
Did you ever think
this would happen?

547
00:28:51,003 --> 00:28:51,838
No.

548
00:28:58,886 --> 00:29:00,856
Can I ask you just one question?

549
00:29:01,424 --> 00:29:02,392
Okay.

550
00:29:04,931 --> 00:29:06,534
What should I do with my life?

551
00:29:09,206 --> 00:29:12,245
You want me, a stranger you
just met in the bathroom

552
00:29:12,279 --> 00:29:14,149
to tell you what
to do with your life?

553
00:29:15,151 --> 00:29:15,987
Yeah.

554
00:29:18,191 --> 00:29:19,961
Are you listening to yourself?

555
00:29:24,904 --> 00:29:27,577
That's a great question.

556
00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:30,515
I just feel‐‐

557
00:29:30,549 --> 00:29:33,521
I don't care what you meant,
I care what I heard.

558
00:29:34,023 --> 00:29:35,458
Let me just look at you.

559
00:29:35,492 --> 00:29:36,293
What?

560
00:29:41,237 --> 00:29:42,239
What?

561
00:29:44,978 --> 00:29:46,380
You look like a troll,

562
00:29:46,948 --> 00:29:48,284
like a pretty little troll.

563
00:29:48,317 --> 00:29:50,556
But whatever else you
think you are you're not.

564
00:29:50,589 --> 00:29:53,428
Your whole life is just a sad
reflection of the people you

565
00:29:53,461 --> 00:29:55,966
choose to obsess over.

566
00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:57,269
Thank you.

567
00:29:57,670 --> 00:29:59,339
I needed to hear that.

568
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:07,289
I'm going to go now.

569
00:30:07,322 --> 00:30:07,990
Okay.

570
00:30:08,024 --> 00:30:09,861
I'll never forget you and um‐‐

571
00:30:11,330 --> 00:30:12,332
thank you.

572
00:30:13,936 --> 00:30:15,004
Fuck you.

573
00:30:16,407 --> 00:30:17,476
I love you.

574
00:30:20,482 --> 00:30:21,551
I love you.

575
00:30:24,089 --> 00:30:26,093
[music]

576
00:30:31,972 --> 00:30:33,307
I'm ready for a new job.

577
00:30:33,541 --> 00:30:35,178
I don't really like kids.

578
00:30:35,546 --> 00:30:38,051
I want to be a writer but
I'm not that good at it.

579
00:30:38,251 --> 00:30:40,221
I think I'll start
a vintage store.

580
00:30:40,255 --> 00:30:41,958
It's lame, but I don't care.

581
00:30:41,992 --> 00:30:45,498
Beth is beautiful and sexy,
but I'm sick of her.

582
00:30:45,699 --> 00:30:46,534
I'm hungry.

583
00:30:46,568 --> 00:30:48,672
Maybe there's a Sonic
on the way back.

584
00:30:48,705 --> 00:30:51,077
I love fast food on the highway,
It always tastes better.

585
00:30:51,110 --> 00:30:52,980
I wonder why? Huh.

586
00:30:53,649 --> 00:30:55,518
That's what my inner
voice sounds like.

587
00:30:55,553 --> 00:30:57,489
It's a little boring.

588
00:30:58,524 --> 00:31:00,462
[music]