1 00:00:13,305 --> 00:00:15,265 [man on device] We don't have any scheduled deliveries. 2 00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:16,266 Please turn around. 3 00:00:16,391 --> 00:00:19,895 Hey, pal, I got a hot date with my old lady in 30 minutes. 4 00:00:19,895 --> 00:00:21,271 Meatball sub night. 5 00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:23,815 And all's I’s knows is I got a package 6 00:00:23,815 --> 00:00:26,026 from Deborah Simon at the studio. 7 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:28,612 Now, I can either leave it here or I can take it home. 8 00:00:28,612 --> 00:00:30,572 You got that? What do you want me to do? 9 00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:34,910 [on device] Go ahead. 10 00:00:34,910 --> 00:00:36,578 That's what I thought. I'll see you a bit. 11 00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:38,372 Hop, hop. 12 00:00:39,915 --> 00:00:43,752 Okay. Hey. Ronald Mandovia, 13 00:00:43,752 --> 00:00:46,672 Mandovia Plumbing, licensed and bonded. 14 00:00:46,672 --> 00:00:48,507 You know, some guys, they're licensed, not bonded. 15 00:00:48,507 --> 00:00:50,008 Other guys, they're bonded, not licensed. 16 00:00:50,008 --> 00:00:52,469 Me, I'm both licensed and bonded. [laughs] 17 00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:53,512 Deborah Simon sent a plumber? 18 00:00:53,512 --> 00:00:56,014 Not a plumber, my man. The plumber. 19 00:00:56,014 --> 00:00:57,975 I can plumb anything with pipes. Fuck it. 20 00:00:57,975 --> 00:00:59,226 Sometimes I don't even need pipes. 21 00:00:59,226 --> 00:01:01,019 One time, I plumbed a manila envelope. 22 00:01:01,019 --> 00:01:03,438 Water was spouting fucking everywhere. It was insane. 23 00:01:03,438 --> 00:01:04,439 So, what's in the van? 24 00:01:04,439 --> 00:01:05,482 Oh, my God. 25 00:01:05,482 --> 00:01:07,526 Hold on to your fucking beautiful, 26 00:01:07,526 --> 00:01:11,613 beautiful balls because this, my man, it's a commode. 27 00:01:12,239 --> 00:01:13,991 Imported Italian marble. 28 00:01:13,991 --> 00:01:17,202 Beautiful one-piece construction, 12-speed bidet. 29 00:01:17,202 --> 00:01:18,787 We got a little air fryer on the right. 30 00:01:18,787 --> 00:01:20,289 You wanna cook, eat, circle of life. 31 00:01:20,289 --> 00:01:21,540 Shitting, eating at the same time. 32 00:01:21,540 --> 00:01:23,375 There's only a couple of these in the entire world. 33 00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:25,127 This, my friend, probably one of the best presents 34 00:01:25,127 --> 00:01:26,295 in the universe. 35 00:01:26,295 --> 00:01:30,257 So can you, uh, you know, uh--huh? 36 00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:35,387 You wanna-- 37 00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:39,391 You're gonna help me fucking bring it in or no? 38 00:01:39,391 --> 00:01:40,767 All right. Fuck it. Whatever, man. 39 00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:43,729 Yeah. Okay. I'll supervise. Bring it up. 40 00:01:43,729 --> 00:01:46,773 Use your back. Whoa, big boy. Big boy coming through. 41 00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:48,942 Big boy coming through. Big boy. 42 00:01:48,942 --> 00:01:51,195 Okay. Andre has the guard's attention. 43 00:01:51,195 --> 00:01:53,363 - Okay. - You sure you're ready for this? 44 00:01:53,363 --> 00:01:56,116 Well, in our family if an A-list actor is in trouble, 45 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,619 we don't stand quietly by. 46 00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:01,121 We fight, and if we must, we die. 47 00:02:03,749 --> 00:02:06,376 Wow. Well, the world could use more people like-- 48 00:02:07,377 --> 00:02:08,712 Wait. What is your last name? 49 00:02:08,712 --> 00:02:10,047 Oh, Mandovia. 50 00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:16,178 Where the hell does this thing go? 51 00:02:16,178 --> 00:02:18,889 Oh, that is the million-dollar question, huh? 52 00:02:18,889 --> 00:02:20,057 [slaps wood] 53 00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:21,308 Let me think about this. 54 00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:24,561 Well, you could powder room it, show it off like a prized pony, 55 00:02:24,561 --> 00:02:27,272 or you put it in the main bath. 56 00:02:27,272 --> 00:02:29,608 Keep all that for yourself. Hmm. 57 00:02:29,608 --> 00:02:31,276 Now, there's a third option, all right? 58 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:33,904 Listen up closely 'cause this one's fucking insane. 59 00:02:33,904 --> 00:02:36,156 You can put the commode right here 60 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,617 smack dab in the middle of the living room 61 00:02:38,617 --> 00:02:41,453 and you dig a big greasy shit right here. 62 00:02:41,453 --> 00:02:42,913 Look everybody right in the eyes, 63 00:02:42,913 --> 00:02:45,249 make them wonder what your deal is. 64 00:02:45,249 --> 00:02:46,500 And I know what you're thinking. 65 00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:48,919 "Holy shit, that's aggressive," right? 66 00:02:48,919 --> 00:02:50,170 But they'll respect the shit out of you. 67 00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:51,880 Wait a minute. Don't I know you? 68 00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:55,175 Don't you know-- don't you know-- oh! 69 00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,760 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 70 00:02:56,760 --> 00:02:57,886 Oh, you know what it is? 71 00:02:57,886 --> 00:02:59,847 Isn't this the place you took a shit so big up there 72 00:02:59,847 --> 00:03:02,057 that people thought there was a dog loose in the pipes? 73 00:03:02,057 --> 00:03:03,684 How the hell, I'mma take a shit-- wait. 74 00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:05,185 What are you talking about? No. 75 00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:06,436 - Wasn't that you? - No. 76 00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:08,063 - No? - A dog in the pipes? 77 00:03:08,063 --> 00:03:10,065 Name is Dachshund. Look like a dachshund. 78 00:03:10,065 --> 00:03:12,734 You been-- Oh, no. Is that the dog? 79 00:03:12,734 --> 00:03:14,361 Wait right here. I'll deal with you in a minute. 80 00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:15,946 Yeah, I'm gonna wait right here. 81 00:03:15,946 --> 00:03:18,282 You ain't all shitty? You know what I mean? 82 00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:21,785 Kevin? Kevin? Are you okay, baby? 83 00:03:21,785 --> 00:03:23,370 Everything went incredible up here. You all right? 84 00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:24,538 [Kevin] Yeah. I'm all right. 85 00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:26,582 Sweating my goddamn ass off though. 86 00:03:26,582 --> 00:03:28,917 Jesus Christ. How come you didn't cut no holes in here? 87 00:03:28,917 --> 00:03:30,586 Well, let's get you out of here and kick some fucking ass. 88 00:03:30,586 --> 00:03:31,587 What do you say, huh? 89 00:03:31,587 --> 00:03:32,838 All right. Come on. Let's go. 90 00:03:32,838 --> 00:03:33,839 Yes. 91 00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:38,343 [upbeat music] 92 00:03:48,020 --> 00:03:49,146 What are you doing? 93 00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:51,607 [Andre] Funny story. You're gonna lose your goddamn mind. 94 00:03:51,607 --> 00:03:54,902 I drilled this puppy a little bit too hard. 95 00:03:54,902 --> 00:03:57,654 I can't get it out without the aid of some tools. 96 00:03:57,654 --> 00:03:59,281 Give me a second. I'm gonna grab some tools. 97 00:03:59,281 --> 00:04:01,116 I'll be right back. Okay. Talk to you soon. 98 00:04:01,116 --> 00:04:02,910 Hey, Andre, you better stop playing. 99 00:04:02,910 --> 00:04:07,414 Seriously, man. Andre. [knocks] Andre. 100 00:04:07,831 --> 00:04:09,833 [fireworks crackling] 101 00:04:15,464 --> 00:04:18,675 Hey. Were those fireworks? 102 00:04:18,675 --> 00:04:21,637 I live next door at the Mandovia Estate. 103 00:04:21,637 --> 00:04:24,348 Did you set those off? You know that that is illegal. 104 00:04:24,348 --> 00:04:26,850 They're not ours. I don't know who set these on. 105 00:04:26,850 --> 00:04:29,478 Well, it's scared the bejesus out of me. 106 00:04:29,478 --> 00:04:31,271 And I have a pacemaker. 107 00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:33,232 What do you have to say for yourself? 108 00:04:33,232 --> 00:04:35,025 Look, lady, I told you they're not my fireworks 109 00:04:35,025 --> 00:04:36,610 and I didn't shit in any pipes. 110 00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:37,569 What? 111 00:04:38,403 --> 00:04:40,113 [shudders] 112 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,282 [thuds] 113 00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:45,035 [sighs] That's for Andre. 114 00:04:50,749 --> 00:04:52,376 [knocks on box] Andre? 115 00:04:54,711 --> 00:04:55,963 Come on, man. I'm serious. 116 00:04:56,672 --> 00:04:58,048 [footsteps approaching] 117 00:04:58,173 --> 00:05:00,217 Hey, yo, what took you so long? Where do you go? 118 00:05:01,260 --> 00:05:03,136 Leave me in this box, went all goddamn quiet. 119 00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:04,096 Don't do that. 120 00:05:04,096 --> 00:05:07,307 - [chainsaw revving] - What the fuck is that? 121 00:05:08,559 --> 00:05:11,562 Hey. Andre, that's a chainsaw? 122 00:05:11,562 --> 00:05:13,355 Okay. Hold up. Wait, wait, wait. 123 00:05:13,355 --> 00:05:14,982 What are you-- what are you-- what do you want? 124 00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:16,108 You [indistinct] me? 125 00:05:16,108 --> 00:05:17,860 Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. 126 00:05:18,527 --> 00:05:20,821 Slow it down! Slow it down! Slow it down! 127 00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:22,573 You're gonna cut my fucking ass. 128 00:05:22,573 --> 00:05:24,199 Watch out. Hey! 129 00:05:24,199 --> 00:05:25,576 No more chainsaw. 130 00:05:25,576 --> 00:05:27,828 No more chain-- no more chainsaw! 131 00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:28,912 No more chainsaw! 132 00:05:28,912 --> 00:05:32,666 Okay. Jesus Christ! Shit! 133 00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:33,959 What the fuck, Andre? 134 00:05:33,959 --> 00:05:37,337 Oh, shit! Oh. Oh. Oh, shit. 135 00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:40,632 On behalf of stunt actors everywhere, 136 00:05:40,632 --> 00:05:45,512 I'm excited to say this is your day of reckoning. 137 00:05:45,512 --> 00:05:47,848 [laughing] 138 00:05:47,848 --> 00:05:48,807 Hold up. 139 00:05:49,725 --> 00:05:51,268 You're trying to tell me a big old stunt legend 140 00:05:51,268 --> 00:05:52,853 like yourself need a chainsaw? 141 00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:55,230 Huh? 142 00:05:57,608 --> 00:05:59,359 That's what the fuck I'm talking about. 143 00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:02,196 Two men-- how about two dogs in a bowl? 144 00:06:02,196 --> 00:06:04,865 I wanna eat. [imitates dog] 145 00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:08,452 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you got a knife? 146 00:06:08,452 --> 00:06:11,830 Big old man like yourself, stunt legend, 147 00:06:11,830 --> 00:06:14,124 you need a knife for little old me? 148 00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:15,083 That's what you need? 149 00:06:15,334 --> 00:06:17,544 Fuck it. I'm killing you with my hands. 150 00:06:17,544 --> 00:06:19,671 - What? Oh. Oh. - Get out. 151 00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:23,091 [grunting] 152 00:06:24,676 --> 00:06:25,844 Yeah. 153 00:06:25,844 --> 00:06:26,929 You know, it didn't go too good for you 154 00:06:26,929 --> 00:06:28,388 in that little shitty hallway. 155 00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,224 Me and Jordan whooped your ass. 156 00:06:31,350 --> 00:06:32,226 [scoffs] The mask I was wearing 157 00:06:32,226 --> 00:06:34,645 was a hundred percent polyester, unbreathable. 158 00:06:34,645 --> 00:06:37,397 Sweating into my contacts, hell, a child could've kicked my ass. 159 00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:39,483 Oh, that's a real elaborate excuse, don't you think? 160 00:06:39,483 --> 00:06:40,651 Superman punch. 161 00:06:42,528 --> 00:06:44,112 [grunting] 162 00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:48,033 Oh, shit! Shit! 163 00:06:52,704 --> 00:06:54,248 [grunting] 164 00:06:54,248 --> 00:06:57,876 Shit! Andre! Andre, do the psychic stuff! 165 00:06:57,876 --> 00:07:00,879 I made all that shit up about your psychic. 166 00:07:00,879 --> 00:07:02,631 You think I'd help you? 167 00:07:02,631 --> 00:07:06,176 You think I'd put it a, a greedy, unappreciative, 168 00:07:06,176 --> 00:07:09,555 overrated actor over a stuntman? [laughs] 169 00:07:09,555 --> 00:07:12,766 I just thought it'd be fun to give you some false hope 170 00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:14,393 before you die. 171 00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:17,563 [groans] Yo, you're gonna break my arm. 172 00:07:17,563 --> 00:07:20,649 Yeah, and then every other one of the 206 bones in your body, 173 00:07:20,649 --> 00:07:22,317 and then I'm gonna eat your ass. 174 00:07:22,317 --> 00:07:25,654 I knew it. I knew you were a ass-eater. [groans] 175 00:07:27,322 --> 00:07:28,407 [grunting] 176 00:07:31,201 --> 00:07:33,120 - Oh, hey. Cute knife. - I'll stab you. 177 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:34,788 What are you gonna do with it? Are you gonna hurt me with it? 178 00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:36,248 Huh? Huh? 179 00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:39,334 No, but she is. 180 00:07:42,379 --> 00:07:43,672 Oh, shit. 181 00:07:44,882 --> 00:07:47,134 - Oh. - Oh, you got him. It's-- okay. 182 00:07:47,134 --> 00:07:50,137 Um, holy shit. Okay. 183 00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:51,972 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey, hey. 184 00:07:51,972 --> 00:07:53,307 Okay. Hey, hey, hey, hey. 185 00:07:53,307 --> 00:07:56,351 Look at me. Look at me. Eyes. You good. 186 00:07:57,019 --> 00:07:58,061 Thirsty. 187 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:01,481 - You what? - Thirst-- thirsty. 188 00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:03,483 We'll get you something to drink. 189 00:08:05,527 --> 00:08:07,571 You fucking threw a knife in his head? 190 00:08:07,571 --> 00:08:09,323 [whispers] I didn't know what else to do. 191 00:08:09,323 --> 00:08:10,449 I meant for his shoulder. 192 00:08:10,449 --> 00:08:11,533 How did you not hit the shoulder? 193 00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:13,619 Like he's the fucking size of the fireplace. 194 00:08:13,619 --> 00:08:14,912 This is him. 195 00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:17,539 [dishes clattering] 196 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:19,291 He's awake. That's a good sign. 197 00:08:19,750 --> 00:08:21,668 It's a good thing. He's-- look, he's fine. He's fine. 198 00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:23,003 [Kevin] What are you talking, he's fine? 199 00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:24,880 [woman] Yeah, look. I mean, he's... 200 00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:27,633 He's a fucking zombie. What do you mean he's fine? 201 00:08:27,633 --> 00:08:29,384 [woman 2] Oh, God. He's gonna burn himself. 202 00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:31,970 He's gonna get a burn on his hand or something. 203 00:08:32,095 --> 00:08:33,138 It's not really the worst thing 204 00:08:33,138 --> 00:08:34,306 that can happen to him at this point. 205 00:08:34,306 --> 00:08:35,807 - [woman 2] That's true. - Huh. 206 00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:37,768 Hey. There he is. 207 00:08:37,768 --> 00:08:41,855 How you doing, man? Jesus Christ. 208 00:08:42,773 --> 00:08:44,066 - He's just... - He's okay. 209 00:08:44,066 --> 00:08:46,610 - Yeah, he's just taking a nap. - He's not-- he's fine. 210 00:08:46,610 --> 00:08:47,778 - He's okay? - Yeah. 211 00:08:47,778 --> 00:08:52,157 Wait. Where's Andre? Where's my sweet boy? 212 00:08:52,491 --> 00:08:55,619 [man] Yeah, don't you worry 'cause I found him. 213 00:08:55,619 --> 00:08:58,497 Sorry. I'm sorry. I made an oopsy-daisy. 214 00:08:58,497 --> 00:08:59,873 I got captured. 215 00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:01,083 I thought I heard your voice, 216 00:09:01,083 --> 00:09:02,626 but it wasn't your voice. It was his voice. 217 00:09:02,626 --> 00:09:03,585 I'm the worst sidekick in the world. 218 00:09:03,585 --> 00:09:04,628 Hey. Hey. Shut up. 219 00:09:04,628 --> 00:09:05,796 - I'm gonna shut up. - Shut up. 220 00:09:05,796 --> 00:09:06,839 I'm gonna shut up.