1 00:00:01,346 --> 00:00:03,348 [film reel rolls] 2 00:00:16,947 --> 00:00:19,364 [birds chirping] 3 00:00:20,572 --> 00:00:23,954 Sing Goddess, Achilles' rage 4 00:00:23,989 --> 00:00:29,029 black, murderous, that cost the Greeks incalculable pain 5 00:00:29,063 --> 00:00:33,516 pitched countless souls of heroes into Hades' dark. 6 00:00:34,586 --> 00:00:36,415 Left their bodies to rot 7 00:00:36,450 --> 00:00:40,488 as corpses for dogs and birds. 8 00:00:41,731 --> 00:00:43,767 Did you learn that last night? 9 00:00:43,802 --> 00:00:44,941 [sighs] 10 00:00:44,975 --> 00:00:46,046 There's not a lot here 11 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:47,333 is there, really, when you think about it? 12 00:00:47,357 --> 00:00:48,876 No, it's not like the film. 13 00:00:48,910 --> 00:00:51,051 It was all sandy beaches, wasn't it? 14 00:00:51,085 --> 00:00:55,503 Greeks were camped here for ten years. 15 00:00:55,538 --> 00:00:57,712 - Too long, isn't it? - Too long to camp. 16 00:00:58,679 --> 00:01:00,577 I can do a week, tops. 17 00:01:00,612 --> 00:01:03,235 - In the Lake District. - Yeah, with a pillow. 18 00:01:03,270 --> 00:01:04,823 I won't camp without a pillow. 19 00:01:07,136 --> 00:01:09,103 Had a bad dream last night. 20 00:01:09,138 --> 00:01:10,967 How was it, a portent? 21 00:01:11,001 --> 00:01:14,039 I don't know, it was, it was bad. 22 00:01:15,454 --> 00:01:18,423 I had a portent once on the old groundsheet. 23 00:01:19,355 --> 00:01:21,495 Stick your head out more. 24 00:01:21,529 --> 00:01:24,498 Find your light. That's it. 25 00:01:24,532 --> 00:01:25,982 Do an "ah-hah." 26 00:01:27,466 --> 00:01:29,296 - Ah-hah! - Got it. 27 00:01:29,330 --> 00:01:32,471 [instrumental music] 28 00:01:48,177 --> 00:01:49,316 - Cheers. - Cheers. 29 00:01:49,350 --> 00:01:51,214 Here's to an enjoyable excursion. 30 00:01:51,249 --> 00:01:52,733 Yeah, hmm. 31 00:01:52,767 --> 00:01:53,768 Hmm. 32 00:01:53,803 --> 00:01:55,805 - Bellissimo. - Hmm, hmm, hmm. 33 00:01:56,875 --> 00:01:59,119 It's very odd, isn't it, to start 34 00:01:59,153 --> 00:02:00,913 a trip to Greece in Turkey? 35 00:02:00,948 --> 00:02:05,263 It was the Observers' idea, um, to retrace the steps of, um 36 00:02:05,297 --> 00:02:08,473 Odysseus and the Odyssey, so that... that's we're doing. 37 00:02:08,507 --> 00:02:10,785 A ten-year odyssey in six days, I mean 38 00:02:10,820 --> 00:02:12,339 it's a... it's ambitious, Steve. 39 00:02:12,373 --> 00:02:14,824 It... it might sound ambitious, but if you think of 40 00:02:14,858 --> 00:02:16,929 uh, "Ulysses," by James Joyce. 41 00:02:16,964 --> 00:02:19,208 Thanks for telling me the author, I'd never have known. 42 00:02:19,242 --> 00:02:20,461 I'm just putting the information 43 00:02:20,485 --> 00:02:21,496 out there in case you don't.. 44 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:22,556 I don't want, you know.. 45 00:02:22,590 --> 00:02:23,833 Well, that's like me saying 46 00:02:23,867 --> 00:02:26,249 "Harry Potter" by J. K. Rowling. 47 00:02:26,284 --> 00:02:28,493 I wouldn't put "Harry Potter" and "Ulysses" 48 00:02:28,527 --> 00:02:30,564 in the same, in the same camp. 49 00:02:30,598 --> 00:02:32,669 Apart from they're both books. But, um... 50 00:02:32,704 --> 00:02:34,568 "Harry Potter" has sold truckloads of books. 51 00:02:34,602 --> 00:02:36,408 Yeah, but the thing is, I don't measure success by 52 00:02:36,432 --> 00:02:38,054 units sold. 53 00:02:38,088 --> 00:02:40,066 I'm just telling you the figures for the, uh, TV shows. 54 00:02:40,090 --> 00:02:41,413 And, yes, but it's not it's just... 55 00:02:41,437 --> 00:02:42,448 And the consolidated ones at that. 56 00:02:42,472 --> 00:02:43,991 It's yes. 57 00:02:44,025 --> 00:02:45,658 'Cause the actual time of viewing aren't impressive 58 00:02:45,682 --> 00:02:48,375 but you do tell me the consolidated figures. 59 00:02:48,409 --> 00:02:51,343 It's nice to be liked, but you shouldn't go out there 60 00:02:51,378 --> 00:02:52,793 trying to be liked. 61 00:02:52,827 --> 00:02:55,554 [utensils clattering] 62 00:02:58,902 --> 00:03:02,182 If you think that we have been doing these 63 00:03:02,216 --> 00:03:04,667 trips for nearly ten years 64 00:03:04,701 --> 00:03:07,877 then I suppose the, in a macro sense 65 00:03:07,911 --> 00:03:10,259 we've been on this odyssey for ten years. 66 00:03:10,293 --> 00:03:11,605 - Yeah? - Is it ten years? 67 00:03:11,639 --> 00:03:13,986 Yeah. It is. 68 00:03:14,021 --> 00:03:15,195 Since the Lakes. 69 00:03:15,919 --> 00:03:16,886 Hmm. 70 00:03:16,920 --> 00:03:19,164 A bit of Richard Gere there. Hmm. 71 00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:20,476 Just looking off. 72 00:03:20,510 --> 00:03:22,098 - Huh. - Yeah, lovely. 73 00:03:22,132 --> 00:03:24,618 Yeah. And you're looking more like him as well. 74 00:03:24,652 --> 00:03:27,310 - That's good? - No, I wasn't being serious. 75 00:03:27,345 --> 00:03:28,587 - I was joking. - Oh. 76 00:03:28,622 --> 00:03:30,934 - You look nothing like him. - Ah. 77 00:03:30,969 --> 00:03:33,247 My God, you lapped the compliment up, didn't you? 78 00:03:33,282 --> 00:03:35,249 - Look at that. - Well, it's not unreasonable. 79 00:03:35,284 --> 00:03:37,089 I'm... I'm not.. I, I mean, I'm wearing my years 80 00:03:37,113 --> 00:03:38,321 reasonably well. 81 00:03:38,356 --> 00:03:40,230 Yeah, but in no way do you resemble Richard Gere. 82 00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:41,462 Okay, I don't think... 83 00:03:41,497 --> 00:03:42,646 You look like a great Steve Coogan. 84 00:03:42,670 --> 00:03:44,051 'Cause you're looking terrific. 85 00:03:44,085 --> 00:03:45,511 And I'm happy with that, more than that. 86 00:03:45,535 --> 00:03:47,019 Yeah, you clutched at Richard Gere. 87 00:03:47,054 --> 00:03:48,963 I look better as I get older. Lots of women say that. 88 00:03:48,987 --> 00:03:50,299 Yes, you do, yes, you do. 89 00:03:50,333 --> 00:03:51,793 Well, I'm gonna, I'm just gonna say it as well 90 00:03:51,817 --> 00:03:53,036 I'm saying it, you look better older. 91 00:03:53,060 --> 00:03:54,026 Well, thank you. 92 00:03:54,061 --> 00:03:55,787 You were unpalatable as a young man. 93 00:03:55,821 --> 00:03:57,961 [machine whirring] 94 00:03:59,549 --> 00:04:00,895 What's this? 95 00:04:00,930 --> 00:04:02,897 If I'm not mistaken, it's a Penguin classic. 96 00:04:02,932 --> 00:04:04,658 And it's by Aristotle. 97 00:04:04,692 --> 00:04:07,385 - I know Ari, yeah. - I know all the Stotles. 98 00:04:07,419 --> 00:04:09,352 Poetics. Listen to this. 99 00:04:09,387 --> 00:04:13,114 "Epic poetry and the composition of tragedy, as well as comedy 100 00:04:13,149 --> 00:04:16,221 "and the arts of poetry and music are 101 00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:18,879 "all imitations. 102 00:04:18,913 --> 00:04:22,779 "Imitation comes naturally to human beings. 103 00:04:22,814 --> 00:04:27,681 And so does the universal pleasure in imitation." 104 00:04:28,544 --> 00:04:29,683 - Um.. - Not my words. 105 00:04:29,717 --> 00:04:31,305 The words of Aristotle. 106 00:04:31,340 --> 00:04:33,963 [sizzling] 107 00:04:36,103 --> 00:04:38,899 So much of... of art and acting is imitation. 108 00:04:38,933 --> 00:04:40,349 Nothing wrong with it. 109 00:04:40,383 --> 00:04:43,006 You did a fantastic imitation 110 00:04:43,041 --> 00:04:47,597 uh, of Stan Laurel in Stan and Ollie, it was superb. 111 00:04:47,632 --> 00:04:50,911 Hmm. I'm not sure it's an imitation, that's the thing. 112 00:04:50,945 --> 00:04:52,602 I watched it on a BAFTA screener. 113 00:04:52,637 --> 00:04:54,535 I only paused it three times 114 00:04:54,570 --> 00:04:55,640 to go to the kitchen. 115 00:04:55,674 --> 00:04:57,158 And that in our house.. 116 00:04:57,193 --> 00:04:58,815 - That's good. - Yeah. Okay, well, yeah. 117 00:04:58,850 --> 00:05:01,370 You had... you had this, yeah? 118 00:05:01,404 --> 00:05:03,889 Had the... the pause, you know the pause? 119 00:05:03,924 --> 00:05:05,512 - Hmm. - You did that beautifully. 120 00:05:05,546 --> 00:05:07,617 - I certainly did. - Hmm! 121 00:05:07,652 --> 00:05:12,484 Now, why don't you just stop sitting there and help me? 122 00:05:12,519 --> 00:05:13,830 Hmm? 123 00:05:13,865 --> 00:05:16,108 Well, I'd... I'd try, but, uh, I... I.. 124 00:05:16,143 --> 00:05:17,903 I don't know what you want me to do. 125 00:05:17,938 --> 00:05:21,113 Stan Laurel and Tom Hardy, ready? 126 00:05:21,148 --> 00:05:24,669 Why don't you just come and hit me instead of sitting there? 127 00:05:24,703 --> 00:05:26,360 I can't hear what you're saying, Tom 128 00:05:26,395 --> 00:05:28,120 you always mumble your lines. 129 00:05:28,155 --> 00:05:29,501 Hmm! 130 00:05:29,536 --> 00:05:31,710 [utensils clattering] 131 00:05:36,128 --> 00:05:38,614 Thank you very much. Lovely, really nice. 132 00:05:38,648 --> 00:05:41,064 I'm being bitten. 133 00:05:41,099 --> 00:05:42,997 It doesn't help that we're under a tree. 134 00:05:43,032 --> 00:05:46,415 Insects love to be under trees. Do you know why? 135 00:05:46,449 --> 00:05:48,727 Yeah, I... I went out on my land recently. 136 00:05:48,762 --> 00:05:50,246 - Yeah. - Uh, to sit under a tree. 137 00:05:50,280 --> 00:05:52,213 - Thirty-six acres, isn't it? - Thirty-eight. 138 00:05:52,248 --> 00:05:54,112 And I went to sit under a tree just to... 139 00:05:54,146 --> 00:05:55,838 To think. Just to think? 140 00:05:55,872 --> 00:05:58,979 No, no, to read a book, actually, I put a blanket down 141 00:05:59,013 --> 00:06:01,706 just 'cause, you know, there's a tree, and I sat under it and, um 142 00:06:01,740 --> 00:06:03,373 started to read, and loads of flies started 143 00:06:03,397 --> 00:06:04,778 hovering over my head, so.. 144 00:06:04,812 --> 00:06:06,883 So, I just got up and just went back in the house. 145 00:06:06,918 --> 00:06:08,264 I had this idea that it would... 146 00:06:08,298 --> 00:06:09,714 Steve Coogan, ladies and gentlemen 147 00:06:09,748 --> 00:06:12,164 wonderful stories from Steve, um 148 00:06:12,199 --> 00:06:14,615 and there'll be more from him at the same time next week. 149 00:06:14,650 --> 00:06:17,377 You know, you must do that one about the flies under the, uh 150 00:06:17,411 --> 00:06:19,931 under the tree, I mean, it... it's wonderful stuff. 151 00:06:19,965 --> 00:06:22,485 Fred said he saw you at, uh, Lords Taverner's 152 00:06:22,520 --> 00:06:23,762 doing that, and, uh 153 00:06:23,797 --> 00:06:25,488 had the room in the palm of his hand 154 00:06:25,523 --> 00:06:27,214 that's, that's what he said. 155 00:06:27,248 --> 00:06:28,767 Wonderful story. 156 00:06:28,802 --> 00:06:30,251 The new Ustinov. 157 00:06:30,735 --> 00:06:32,599 [laughs] 158 00:06:32,633 --> 00:06:34,186 Steve Coogan. 159 00:06:34,221 --> 00:06:35,440 If you heard that story Steve's telling? 160 00:06:35,464 --> 00:06:36,913 No, what is it? 161 00:06:36,948 --> 00:06:38,788 Oh, he's at the house, you know the house in Sussex? 162 00:06:38,812 --> 00:06:41,021 Yeah. Well, he... he took a book out. 163 00:06:41,055 --> 00:06:43,161 No, go on. Um, he wanted to read. 164 00:06:43,195 --> 00:06:45,128 And he went out, and he's got 38 acres. 165 00:06:45,163 --> 00:06:48,477 Yes. He finds a tree, puts a blanket down. 166 00:06:48,511 --> 00:06:49,995 Oh, it's idyllic. 167 00:06:50,030 --> 00:06:52,515 And, uh, flies gathered above his head. 168 00:06:52,550 --> 00:06:54,172 He went back in the house. 169 00:06:54,206 --> 00:06:56,761 [laughs] 170 00:06:56,795 --> 00:06:59,867 I mean, he's.. Oh, God. 171 00:06:59,902 --> 00:07:02,560 God. And some people say he's just Alan Partridge. 172 00:07:02,594 --> 00:07:03,871 He's not. 173 00:07:03,906 --> 00:07:05,908 There's whole other sides to him. 174 00:07:06,840 --> 00:07:08,151 So, sir, your main courses. 175 00:07:08,186 --> 00:07:10,671 - Oh, lovely, very nice. - Thank you. 176 00:07:10,706 --> 00:07:13,847 - Lamb chops. - Chop, chop. 177 00:07:13,881 --> 00:07:15,814 - With mint sauce. - Looks lovely. 178 00:07:19,093 --> 00:07:20,381 - Enjoy, monsieur. - That's lovely. 179 00:07:20,405 --> 00:07:21,958 Thank you very much. 180 00:07:21,993 --> 00:07:23,522 - You like lamb, don't you? - I do, I love lamb. 181 00:07:23,546 --> 00:07:26,480 Lamb's very good because, um, it doesn't lend itself 182 00:07:26,515 --> 00:07:29,345 to intensive farming, so if you can't make an organic choice 183 00:07:29,379 --> 00:07:30,760 lamb's a safe bet. 184 00:07:31,727 --> 00:07:34,074 [speaking in foreign language] 185 00:07:39,079 --> 00:07:40,977 My publisher wants me to use 186 00:07:41,012 --> 00:07:43,911 the "Odyssey" as a peg on which to hang my Odyssey 187 00:07:43,946 --> 00:07:46,949 through life of the media. 188 00:07:46,983 --> 00:07:49,054 Isn't that what you wrote when we were in Spain? 189 00:07:49,089 --> 00:07:51,540 A version of that, yeah, but, um, it was successful 190 00:07:51,574 --> 00:07:54,577 so they want sort of a variation on the theme. 191 00:07:54,612 --> 00:07:58,754 I do think as you get older it's inevitable, you repeat yourself. 192 00:07:58,788 --> 00:08:00,904 But this is the fourth time we've been on one of these 193 00:08:00,928 --> 00:08:02,171 little jaunts. 194 00:08:02,205 --> 00:08:03,655 Well, originality is overrated. 195 00:08:03,690 --> 00:08:06,071 'Cause everything's a derivative of something. 196 00:08:06,106 --> 00:08:08,349 The greatest poem in the Roman Empire was a rip-off 197 00:08:08,384 --> 00:08:09,489 of the "Odyssey." 198 00:08:09,523 --> 00:08:10,559 Which one? 199 00:08:10,593 --> 00:08:11,939 - "The Aeneid." - Oh. 200 00:08:11,974 --> 00:08:14,045 Whereas the "Odyssey's" about Odysseus fleeing 201 00:08:14,079 --> 00:08:16,565 Troy to... to go home, um 202 00:08:16,599 --> 00:08:19,775 the "Aeneid" is about a Trojan fleeing the city 203 00:08:19,809 --> 00:08:22,122 uh, with his father and his son. 204 00:08:22,156 --> 00:08:24,262 What about his wife? 205 00:08:24,296 --> 00:08:25,722 He's lost her along the way, you know. 206 00:08:25,746 --> 00:08:27,161 Shit, shit happens. 207 00:08:27,196 --> 00:08:29,509 Um, on the plus side, he went on to found Rome 208 00:08:29,543 --> 00:08:32,097 so lose a wife, found an empire. 209 00:08:32,132 --> 00:08:34,375 [utensils clattering] 210 00:08:36,999 --> 00:08:39,070 This was like a kind of interrogation. 211 00:08:39,104 --> 00:08:40,520 Sitting like this. 212 00:08:43,764 --> 00:08:45,214 - Your desserts, sir. - Thank you. 213 00:08:47,596 --> 00:08:48,711 [speaks in foreign language] 214 00:08:48,735 --> 00:08:50,253 It's black mulberry sauce. 215 00:08:50,288 --> 00:08:51,507 Thank you very much, could we have the bill please? 216 00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:53,118 - Okay, sir. - Thank you very much. 217 00:08:53,153 --> 00:08:55,224 If it was an interrogation, this would be very 218 00:08:55,258 --> 00:08:56,857 this would be the nice part before the nasty one. 219 00:08:56,881 --> 00:08:58,054 Let's have some dessert. 220 00:08:58,089 --> 00:08:59,746 We'd, we'd, uh.. I wanna make this 221 00:08:59,780 --> 00:09:01,541 as pleasant as possible, so, uh.. 222 00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:03,922 Oh, great, yeah, what do you want to know? 223 00:09:03,957 --> 00:09:06,269 - Hmm. - Lovely, isn't it? 224 00:09:06,304 --> 00:09:08,375 Lovely combination of textures. This is not.. 225 00:09:08,409 --> 00:09:10,722 [phone rings] 226 00:09:10,757 --> 00:09:12,310 This is not too light. 227 00:09:13,345 --> 00:09:15,589 - But it's light. - Hello? 228 00:09:15,624 --> 00:09:16,970 Hey, Steve, you alright? 229 00:09:17,004 --> 00:09:18,661 Just calling to check everything's okay? 230 00:09:18,696 --> 00:09:21,353 Everything is wonderful, I'm here with, uh, Rob Brydon. 231 00:09:21,388 --> 00:09:22,952 But apart from that everything's wonderful. 232 00:09:22,976 --> 00:09:24,218 Hi, hi, Rob, how are you doing? 233 00:09:24,253 --> 00:09:25,610 All is well. He's not gone missing. 234 00:09:25,634 --> 00:09:27,049 I'm keeping an eye on him. 235 00:09:27,083 --> 00:09:28,647 What do you mean? What are you talking about? 236 00:09:28,671 --> 00:09:31,743 In Morocco, she was very worried when you went off the grid. 237 00:09:31,778 --> 00:09:32,917 Yeah? 238 00:09:32,951 --> 00:09:34,470 She was gonna call the authorities 239 00:09:34,504 --> 00:09:37,956 all the newspapers, "British comic goes missing." 240 00:09:37,991 --> 00:09:40,510 Yeah, British actor, British actor, writer 241 00:09:40,545 --> 00:09:41,650 producer goes missing. 242 00:09:41,684 --> 00:09:43,513 British Actor goes missing, friends say 243 00:09:43,548 --> 00:09:47,276 "We had no idea the mental turmoil he was under." 244 00:09:47,310 --> 00:09:49,450 We spoke to his close friend Rob Brydon. 245 00:09:49,485 --> 00:09:51,314 Well, I must say.. 246 00:09:51,349 --> 00:09:53,213 Spoke to his asso, his associate. 247 00:09:53,247 --> 00:09:55,215 We spoke to his dear confidante, Rob Brydon. 248 00:09:55,249 --> 00:09:56,768 Just his sometime collaborator. 249 00:09:56,803 --> 00:09:59,599 We spoke to popular entertainer, Rob Brydon who said... 250 00:09:59,633 --> 00:10:01,601 He's a, a light, light entertainer, Rob Brydon. 251 00:10:01,635 --> 00:10:04,914 We spoke to popular light entertainer and confidante 252 00:10:04,949 --> 00:10:06,502 of troubled star, Rob Brydon. 253 00:10:06,536 --> 00:10:07,814 Troubled TV funny man. 254 00:10:07,848 --> 00:10:11,058 Who said, I had no idea Steve was suffering 255 00:10:11,093 --> 00:10:12,577 in the way he was. 256 00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:14,313 We didn't know he was suffering, but then we realized 257 00:10:14,337 --> 00:10:16,167 he'd spent, uh, six days with Roby Brydon 258 00:10:16,201 --> 00:10:18,479 and things started to fall into place then. 259 00:10:18,514 --> 00:10:21,517 We think this might be a cry for help. 260 00:10:21,551 --> 00:10:22,691 Sorry, I've got to go. 261 00:10:22,725 --> 00:10:24,451 I just wanted to let you know that your boat 262 00:10:24,485 --> 00:10:27,178 is gonna be leaving Asos at 2:30. 263 00:10:27,212 --> 00:10:29,939 So, go to Asos, to the boat, by 2:30, okay 264 00:10:29,974 --> 00:10:31,848 then your Range Rover's gonna be waiting for when you arrive. 265 00:10:31,872 --> 00:10:33,771 Get our asses in the boat when? 266 00:10:33,805 --> 00:10:36,049 Wonderful, looking forward to it, sweetheart, ta-ta. 267 00:10:36,083 --> 00:10:37,740 Bye, alright, see you. 268 00:10:37,775 --> 00:10:38,983 Do you understand any of that? 269 00:10:39,017 --> 00:10:40,294 Yeah. 270 00:10:40,329 --> 00:10:42,469 Range Rover waiting for us at Lesbos. 271 00:10:45,265 --> 00:10:48,337 [instrumental music] 272 00:10:52,513 --> 00:10:57,139 This is what UNESCO says about Asos. 273 00:10:57,173 --> 00:11:00,556 In antiquity, its hilltop location made 274 00:11:00,590 --> 00:11:03,697 Asos an easily defensible port city. 275 00:11:03,732 --> 00:11:06,493 The oldest Doric temple in Asia Minor 276 00:11:06,527 --> 00:11:10,117 the Temple of Athena at Asos, is located 277 00:11:10,152 --> 00:11:12,016 on the top of the Acropolis. 278 00:11:15,709 --> 00:11:20,196 That's Lesbos, that's the, uh, border between Asia and Europe. 279 00:11:22,302 --> 00:11:23,717 It's close, isn't it? 280 00:11:23,752 --> 00:11:25,754 Yeah, I could swim that. 281 00:11:25,788 --> 00:11:27,514 You could not. 282 00:11:27,548 --> 00:11:30,551 Somebody like Byron swimming the Alice Pont 283 00:11:30,586 --> 00:11:33,762 from, you know, Asia to Europe and Istanbul. 284 00:11:33,796 --> 00:11:36,050 That's why all the refugees come this way 'cause it's so easy. 285 00:11:36,074 --> 00:11:38,111 They don't swim it, they do it in boats. 286 00:11:38,145 --> 00:11:39,733 Yeah, very little boats. 287 00:11:39,768 --> 00:11:42,494 Byron said of all the things he'd achieved 288 00:11:42,529 --> 00:11:45,221 swimming the Alice Pont was the thing that made him most proud. 289 00:11:46,533 --> 00:11:48,708 Oh, fair enough. 290 00:11:48,742 --> 00:11:51,780 What would you say was the thing you were most proud of? 291 00:11:51,814 --> 00:11:54,575 Uh, my seven BAFTAs. 292 00:11:54,610 --> 00:11:57,026 Hmm, and for me, it would be my children. 293 00:11:57,061 --> 00:11:59,788 Yeah, well, 'cause, yeah, 'cause you haven't got any BAFTAs. 294 00:11:59,822 --> 00:12:02,756 Though you have got children, which is interesting. 295 00:12:08,935 --> 00:12:10,775 Now, William, uh, some of the men are not happy 296 00:12:10,799 --> 00:12:12,041 there are rumblings. 297 00:12:12,076 --> 00:12:13,698 Oh, there are rumblings, are there? 298 00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:15,400 Well, you tell the men that we will sail around 299 00:12:15,424 --> 00:12:18,185 the Cape of Good Hope and we'll sail around the horn. 300 00:12:18,220 --> 00:12:20,222 I think if the weather was this nice 301 00:12:20,256 --> 00:12:21,810 we would have been a lot more relaxed. 302 00:12:21,844 --> 00:12:24,398 They're loving it, Bill. They really are. 303 00:12:24,433 --> 00:12:25,928 Well, thank you very much, uh, Fletcher. 304 00:12:25,952 --> 00:12:27,308 You don't mind if I call you Fletcher do you? 305 00:12:27,332 --> 00:12:28,782 Call me Fletcher if you like, mate. 306 00:12:28,817 --> 00:12:30,035 Thank you very much, I'll call you Fletch. 307 00:12:30,059 --> 00:12:31,785 Can I call you Bill? 308 00:12:31,820 --> 00:12:33,936 Yeah, of course, you can, I'd rather call you Mr. Christian. 309 00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:35,202 Not Fletch? 310 00:12:35,237 --> 00:12:38,102 [instrumental music] 311 00:12:43,866 --> 00:12:46,420 [ship horn blares] 312 00:12:54,912 --> 00:12:56,568 Ahoy! 313 00:12:58,156 --> 00:12:59,882 Said, "Ah-hah." 314 00:12:59,917 --> 00:13:01,159 Is that? 315 00:13:02,229 --> 00:13:04,093 Ahoy! 316 00:13:06,751 --> 00:13:08,132 Ah-hah! 317 00:13:12,412 --> 00:13:14,345 You've got a huge drive then? 318 00:13:14,379 --> 00:13:15,829 Yeah, it was a monster really. 319 00:13:15,864 --> 00:13:17,244 So are you flying back now? 320 00:13:17,279 --> 00:13:20,316 Yeah. Uh, here the keys. 321 00:13:20,351 --> 00:13:22,180 - Thank you. - Yeah, enjoy. 322 00:13:22,215 --> 00:13:24,907 - Full tank? - Tank's full and it's a hybrid. 323 00:13:24,942 --> 00:13:27,668 Steve? 324 00:13:27,703 --> 00:13:29,705 - Alright. Good. - Safe flight. 325 00:13:29,739 --> 00:13:31,362 Cheers. Bye-bye. 326 00:13:31,396 --> 00:13:34,399 Steve, how are you? This is Kareem. 327 00:13:34,434 --> 00:13:36,816 Do you remember me? We worked together in Mykonos. 328 00:13:38,300 --> 00:13:40,681 I played, uh, refugees in the beach. 329 00:13:40,716 --> 00:13:42,787 Okay. 330 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:44,893 - Do you remember me? - Refugee? 331 00:13:44,927 --> 00:13:45,928 - Yes. - How are you? 332 00:13:45,963 --> 00:13:46,998 I am Kareem, how are you? 333 00:13:47,033 --> 00:13:48,517 - Hi, very good. - I'm good. 334 00:13:48,551 --> 00:13:50,450 Good to see you, yeah, really good. 335 00:13:50,484 --> 00:13:52,038 - Hiya. Rob. - That's Rob, yeah, yeah. 336 00:13:52,072 --> 00:13:53,384 - Kareem. - Hello. 337 00:13:53,418 --> 00:13:55,017 How are you doing? What are you doing here? 338 00:13:55,041 --> 00:13:57,698 Uh, well, it's not a holiday, we're... we're actually working 339 00:13:57,733 --> 00:13:59,908 with... with we're retracing the... the steps 340 00:13:59,942 --> 00:14:01,323 of, um, Odysseus, you know 341 00:14:01,357 --> 00:14:02,669 going from Troy to Ithaca. 342 00:14:02,703 --> 00:14:05,016 What about you? Are you still with the refugees? 343 00:14:05,051 --> 00:14:06,811 I'm working with the refugees still. 344 00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:08,340 - Right. - Are there refugees still here? 345 00:14:08,364 --> 00:14:10,056 - Yes, yes, yes. - Thousands of refugees. 346 00:14:10,090 --> 00:14:11,160 - Thousands? - Yes. 347 00:14:11,195 --> 00:14:13,542 You know, maybe I need a lift 348 00:14:13,576 --> 00:14:16,821 maybe it could be so good for you, come and see? 349 00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:18,409 It is very good for you all to see. 350 00:14:18,443 --> 00:14:19,444 - See? - Come see it now? 351 00:14:19,479 --> 00:14:20,894 - Yes. - We'd love to. 352 00:14:20,929 --> 00:14:22,285 But we've gotta.. Where have we gotta go next? 353 00:14:22,309 --> 00:14:23,897 - We've got a... - Do you know what? 354 00:14:23,932 --> 00:14:26,796 We're... we're not so busy that we can't spare enough time 355 00:14:26,831 --> 00:14:28,350 to drop him off. 356 00:14:28,384 --> 00:14:30,835 That's what odysseys are all about, we'll hop in the car. 357 00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:34,149 It'd be good for, uh, Rob to see a refugee camp, it's true. 358 00:14:34,183 --> 00:14:36,806 Yeah, it'd be, be good for me to see a refugee camp. 359 00:14:36,841 --> 00:14:38,094 Thank you, thank you, guys, for the lift. 360 00:14:38,118 --> 00:14:39,499 - Yes. - No worries. 361 00:14:41,294 --> 00:14:43,192 It's a really nice car, Steve. 362 00:14:43,227 --> 00:14:45,919 Thanks, not mine, it's, um.. 363 00:14:45,954 --> 00:14:48,301 It was loaned to me for this.. 364 00:14:48,335 --> 00:14:50,406 - Us. - Thing we're doing. To us. 365 00:14:50,441 --> 00:14:52,477 I mean, it's a hybrid, so it's half-electric. 366 00:14:52,512 --> 00:14:54,963 So it kind of cushions the impact that 367 00:14:54,997 --> 00:14:56,826 a monster gas guzzler like this normally... 368 00:14:56,861 --> 00:14:58,528 It's important to you, isn't it? That's important. 369 00:14:58,552 --> 00:15:00,830 - Well, it is, yeah. - All the environmental thing. 370 00:15:00,865 --> 00:15:02,832 - But, uh... - Steve's got nine cars, Kareem. 371 00:15:02,867 --> 00:15:05,456 - Nine car? So good, man. - Yeah, nine cars. 372 00:15:05,490 --> 00:15:07,389 That's, that's, that's irrelevant. 373 00:15:07,423 --> 00:15:09,218 How many of them are electric? 374 00:15:09,253 --> 00:15:10,599 - I have an electric car. - Yeah. 375 00:15:10,633 --> 00:15:12,014 We're writing an article, uh.. 376 00:15:12,049 --> 00:15:13,498 I'm writing an article for... 377 00:15:13,533 --> 00:15:15,776 - I'm writing an article. - Well, Rob is. And.. 378 00:15:15,811 --> 00:15:18,469 Steve doesn't have time to actually write it. 379 00:15:18,503 --> 00:15:20,954 - I do. - Got lot of weighty thoughts. 380 00:15:20,989 --> 00:15:22,967 Gotta service his cars, I mean, that takes a lot of his time. 381 00:15:22,991 --> 00:15:25,959 I do. Anyhow, so, so what's, what's been going on? 382 00:15:25,994 --> 00:15:29,273 What, uh, wh... what are you up to... up to at the moment? 383 00:15:29,307 --> 00:15:32,310 I'm here now set up, uh, a cultural event 384 00:15:32,345 --> 00:15:33,967 it's a musical and dance. 385 00:15:34,002 --> 00:15:35,348 Really? 386 00:15:35,382 --> 00:15:37,833 We do some music courses, music therapy. 387 00:15:37,867 --> 00:15:39,352 I dance some, they do some teaching. 388 00:15:39,386 --> 00:15:40,732 - Great. - Fantastic. 389 00:15:40,767 --> 00:15:43,183 Some community building, inclusion. 390 00:15:43,218 --> 00:15:44,426 Great. 391 00:15:44,460 --> 00:15:46,911 Here we are. This is a small city. 392 00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:49,845 Wow. Gosh. 393 00:15:49,879 --> 00:15:52,020 So, what's this barbed wire for? That's.. 394 00:15:52,054 --> 00:15:53,745 It looks like a prison camp. 395 00:15:53,780 --> 00:15:56,472 Is that to stop people getting in or stop them getting out? 396 00:15:56,507 --> 00:15:59,820 Obviously, of this camp is really prison. 397 00:15:59,855 --> 00:16:03,548 It's more established than I would have expected. 398 00:16:07,518 --> 00:16:08,968 Really nice to meet you. 399 00:16:09,002 --> 00:16:11,384 Good luck with everything, hope it all works out. 400 00:16:13,144 --> 00:16:15,008 Goodbye. 401 00:16:15,043 --> 00:16:17,079 Oh, Steve, thank you very much. 402 00:16:17,114 --> 00:16:18,736 Okay, thank you. 403 00:16:18,770 --> 00:16:20,852 I'm coming to Britain, right? I hope, we'll see you there. 404 00:16:20,876 --> 00:16:22,498 - Well, you've got my email so.. - Yes. 405 00:16:22,533 --> 00:16:24,328 I will contact you, thank you. 406 00:16:24,362 --> 00:16:26,744 Do the turning here, I will go inside. 407 00:16:33,199 --> 00:16:34,890 [exhales] 408 00:16:43,519 --> 00:16:44,969 Well, that was sobering. 409 00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:48,628 Imagine living in that for years and years and years. 410 00:16:48,662 --> 00:16:50,423 Hmm. Well, it's just like the Greeks. 411 00:16:50,457 --> 00:16:52,218 Uh, camped outside Troy 412 00:16:52,252 --> 00:16:53,874 for the best part of ten years. 413 00:16:53,909 --> 00:16:56,360 Too long, I've said it before, I'll say it again 414 00:16:56,394 --> 00:16:58,465 that's too long for camping. 415 00:16:59,777 --> 00:17:01,192 Nice guy. 416 00:17:01,227 --> 00:17:04,678 Uh, yes, he's, yeah, well, um, yeah, he's a very nice bloke. 417 00:17:04,713 --> 00:17:08,648 I mean, I, I know him, we worked together last year on a film. 418 00:17:08,682 --> 00:17:09,614 He said. 419 00:17:09,649 --> 00:17:10,995 He play.. He played a sort 420 00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:12,652 of version of himself. 421 00:17:12,686 --> 00:17:14,619 You didn't remember him, did you? 422 00:17:14,654 --> 00:17:17,588 What? Of course, I remembered him. 423 00:17:17,622 --> 00:17:20,832 I bloody worked with him for a month at least. 424 00:17:20,867 --> 00:17:22,731 So I.. Of course I remembered him. 425 00:17:22,765 --> 00:17:25,389 Like maybe not at first, but eventually, yeah, like, yeah. 426 00:17:25,423 --> 00:17:27,425 "Hey, how you doing?" You know, and, uh.. 427 00:17:28,875 --> 00:17:30,566 What's his name? 428 00:17:32,499 --> 00:17:33,949 What's his name? 429 00:17:33,983 --> 00:17:35,685 Well, I'm not gonna be tested by you just asking me 430 00:17:35,709 --> 00:17:37,090 what his name, what's his name? 431 00:17:37,125 --> 00:17:39,092 I'm not testing you, I'm just interested to see 432 00:17:39,127 --> 00:17:40,404 what's his name? 433 00:17:44,891 --> 00:17:45,892 Khaled. 434 00:17:45,926 --> 00:17:47,790 [scoffs] 435 00:17:47,825 --> 00:17:49,309 It's Kareem. 436 00:17:49,344 --> 00:17:51,104 Okay, so I got the first syllable right. 437 00:17:51,139 --> 00:17:52,692 Oh, well done. 438 00:17:55,833 --> 00:17:58,180 You know where the word lesbian comes from? 439 00:17:58,215 --> 00:17:59,526 Yes, Mr. Bond. 440 00:17:59,561 --> 00:18:01,425 It's from the island, it's from Lesbos. 441 00:18:01,459 --> 00:18:04,324 Sappho was the priestess who wrote erotic poetry 442 00:18:04,359 --> 00:18:08,639 to all these women she loved and, uh, and was obsessed with. 443 00:18:08,673 --> 00:18:14,058 And she was the most celebrated poet, not lesbian 444 00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:16,819 but the most celebrated poets in Ancient Greece. 445 00:18:16,854 --> 00:18:20,064 And she was a woman and she was a lesbian. 446 00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:21,997 It's a shame we're getting the ferry. 447 00:18:22,031 --> 00:18:25,311 I would like to stay in the Hotel Lesbian 448 00:18:25,345 --> 00:18:26,657 as I'm sure you would. 449 00:18:26,691 --> 00:18:29,073 I think.. Come, come, Mr. Bond 450 00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:32,387 you like staying in the Hotel Lesbian just as much as I do. 451 00:18:32,421 --> 00:18:37,495 If I can get my head down in the Lesbian, I'm more than happy. 452 00:18:38,531 --> 00:18:39,946 Welcome to the Hotel Lesbian. 453 00:18:39,980 --> 00:18:42,224 You can check out any time you like. 454 00:18:42,259 --> 00:18:45,020 - But you can never leave. - But you can never leave. 455 00:18:50,508 --> 00:18:53,442 [foghorn blaring] 456 00:19:01,519 --> 00:19:08,112 ♪ Sailing I am sailing 457 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:11,633 ♪ Home again 458 00:19:11,667 --> 00:19:15,533 ♪ Across the sea 459 00:19:15,568 --> 00:19:19,192 ♪ I am sailing 460 00:19:19,227 --> 00:19:22,851 ♪ Stormy waters 461 00:19:22,885 --> 00:19:26,751 ♪ To be near you 462 00:19:26,786 --> 00:19:30,134 ♪ To be free 463 00:19:31,446 --> 00:19:32,930 When I was in Australia, there was 464 00:19:32,964 --> 00:19:35,484 a 25-year-old girl on the crew 465 00:19:35,519 --> 00:19:37,831 who had never heard of Rod Stewart. 466 00:19:37,866 --> 00:19:41,110 Never heard those two words in that order. 467 00:19:41,145 --> 00:19:43,019 So, when I used to go out with a girl, they used to say, uh 468 00:19:43,043 --> 00:19:45,149 "Remember this and remember that," and I'd just go 469 00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:47,807 "When I was young, we used to do this." 470 00:19:55,055 --> 00:19:58,645 Stagira is the birth place of Aristotle. 471 00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:00,129 Stagira was besieged 472 00:20:00,164 --> 00:20:03,098 and destroyed in 348 B.C. by Philip of Macedon. 473 00:20:03,132 --> 00:20:07,102 The inhabitants were enslaved, later Philip rebuilt the city 474 00:20:07,136 --> 00:20:10,795 as a reward for Aristotle being tutored to his son, Alexander. 475 00:20:13,522 --> 00:20:15,144 How much further is it? 476 00:20:15,179 --> 00:20:18,562 Uh, it's just around, it's just to the the top of this road. 477 00:20:20,426 --> 00:20:22,704 I've got a stone in my sandal again. 478 00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:25,534 [heavy breathing] 479 00:20:25,569 --> 00:20:27,433 Come on. 480 00:20:27,467 --> 00:20:28,779 What do you mean, come on? 481 00:20:30,298 --> 00:20:34,785 Well, this is it, this is the shine to Aristotle. 482 00:20:34,819 --> 00:20:38,306 Well, they imported his ashes, uh, back here 483 00:20:38,340 --> 00:20:39,962 specially to, to leave them here 484 00:20:39,997 --> 00:20:43,449 as, it's his hometown, you know. 485 00:20:43,483 --> 00:20:45,589 It's not a lot to look at, is it? 486 00:20:45,623 --> 00:20:47,418 You can see why they don't charge. 487 00:20:47,453 --> 00:20:48,592 There'd be uproar. 488 00:20:48,626 --> 00:20:50,110 That Legoland costs a fortune 489 00:20:50,145 --> 00:20:51,595 but you get a lot for your money. 490 00:20:51,629 --> 00:20:53,907 [sighs] 491 00:20:53,942 --> 00:20:55,909 Do you think there'll be a memorial to you? 492 00:20:55,944 --> 00:20:57,601 I don't believe in monuments. 493 00:20:57,635 --> 00:20:59,672 Just something modest in Manchester? 494 00:20:59,706 --> 00:21:01,225 Uh, yeah, a plaque. 495 00:21:02,364 --> 00:21:04,780 [speaking in foreign language] 496 00:21:09,820 --> 00:21:11,856 I didn't picture Macedonia like this. 497 00:21:11,891 --> 00:21:13,893 It's, I... I imagined it to be quite rugged 498 00:21:13,927 --> 00:21:19,416 I didn't think it would be verdant and soft. 499 00:21:19,450 --> 00:21:20,865 Well.. 500 00:21:22,142 --> 00:21:23,558 - Excuse me. - Your starters, sir. 501 00:21:23,592 --> 00:21:25,594 Thank you. 502 00:21:25,629 --> 00:21:26,975 As a starter, we have the mussels 503 00:21:27,009 --> 00:21:29,184 on smoked pine needles with Parmesan cheese 504 00:21:29,218 --> 00:21:32,049 spring asparagus, a little bit of citrus and espresso powder. 505 00:21:32,083 --> 00:21:33,602 - Enjoy. - Thank you, Mr. Tim. 506 00:21:33,637 --> 00:21:35,121 - Thank you. - My pleasure. 507 00:21:35,155 --> 00:21:38,055 Espresso powder dust, that's, uh, an ingredient 508 00:21:38,089 --> 00:21:40,609 I wasn't expecting, but, uh, it's also, uh 509 00:21:40,644 --> 00:21:42,370 piqued my curiosity. 510 00:21:42,404 --> 00:21:44,061 So have a little.. 511 00:21:45,131 --> 00:21:46,926 Hmm! 512 00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:49,860 - Well, that's, uh.. - Hmm, that's complex. 513 00:21:49,894 --> 00:21:52,069 That is absolutely divine. 514 00:21:54,002 --> 00:21:55,831 [utensils clattering] 515 00:21:58,351 --> 00:21:59,949 People who talk about Alexander the Great 516 00:21:59,973 --> 00:22:03,839 will overlook all the psychotic tendencies he had. 517 00:22:03,874 --> 00:22:06,014 With his mother, he conspired to kill 518 00:22:06,048 --> 00:22:08,396 his father, and then after that 519 00:22:08,430 --> 00:22:11,882 went on a killing spree rounding up all his half-siblings 520 00:22:11,916 --> 00:22:14,298 and, uh, cousins who might have a legitimate claim 521 00:22:14,333 --> 00:22:16,611 to the throne, and just ruthlessly 522 00:22:16,645 --> 00:22:18,026 and horribly murdered them. 523 00:22:18,060 --> 00:22:20,373 He was a gangster, an old-fashioned gangster. 524 00:22:20,408 --> 00:22:22,375 Why do we call him Alexander the Great? 525 00:22:22,410 --> 00:22:25,930 They call me great, but I'm actually just a gangster. 526 00:22:25,965 --> 00:22:28,243 I'm gonna commit atrocious crimes. 527 00:22:28,277 --> 00:22:29,831 I'm doing Marlon Brando. 528 00:22:29,865 --> 00:22:31,280 Then why'd you fuck that up? 529 00:22:31,315 --> 00:22:33,006 Commit atrocious crimes. 530 00:22:33,041 --> 00:22:35,043 I'm gonna behave despicably. 531 00:22:35,077 --> 00:22:37,632 You know you need to make it more, give it more weight 532 00:22:37,666 --> 00:22:38,988 when you speak like that, you know. 533 00:22:39,012 --> 00:22:40,404 Well, why are you doing it differently? 534 00:22:40,428 --> 00:22:42,153 You're going to look like that but for.. 535 00:22:42,188 --> 00:22:43,362 [mumbles] 536 00:22:43,396 --> 00:22:44,916 What are you doing here? Lemme hear it. 537 00:22:45,916 --> 00:22:47,469 It's, uh, he speaks like 538 00:22:47,504 --> 00:22:50,023 he has his cheeks are full of cotton wool. 539 00:22:50,058 --> 00:22:51,680 Well, they were full of cotton wool. 540 00:22:51,715 --> 00:22:54,752 I know, but they weren't full with those things that dentists 541 00:22:54,787 --> 00:22:56,005 use to shove in the side of your mouth. 542 00:22:56,029 --> 00:22:58,100 Dental swab, a dental swab. 543 00:22:58,135 --> 00:23:00,275 A swab. They don't use them anymore for some reason. 544 00:23:00,309 --> 00:23:03,485 I don't know why. Because dentistry has advanced. 545 00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:05,107 Dentistry has advanced. 546 00:23:05,142 --> 00:23:07,178 They've made a lot of great strides in dentistry. 547 00:23:07,213 --> 00:23:09,077 I know it has, you know, dentistry's advanced 548 00:23:09,111 --> 00:23:10,710 quite a lot, actually, that's, you know what. 549 00:23:10,734 --> 00:23:14,323 That I'd like to hire you, Aristotle, to, uh, to educate 550 00:23:14,358 --> 00:23:17,085 my son, I'd like you to teach him a lot about philosophy. 551 00:23:17,119 --> 00:23:19,950 Well, I... I.. I'm, I'm very flattered by the offer 552 00:23:19,984 --> 00:23:22,504 but I must say I'm finding it very hard to forget 553 00:23:22,539 --> 00:23:24,782 what you did to Stagira, which was a smashing spot. 554 00:23:24,817 --> 00:23:26,588 Oh, you know what, I tell you what, tell what I'm gonna do. 555 00:23:26,612 --> 00:23:29,131 If you don't teach my son, I'll rip your head off and shit down 556 00:23:29,166 --> 00:23:31,075 your goddamn fucking neck, you too big, dick sucking 557 00:23:31,099 --> 00:23:33,412 mother fucking asshole, okay? 558 00:23:33,446 --> 00:23:35,621 But it's essentially being a gangster. 559 00:23:35,655 --> 00:23:38,313 Maybe in the East End of London could be right, Winston? 560 00:23:38,347 --> 00:23:41,523 If you're gonna be teaching my boy, Aristotle 561 00:23:41,558 --> 00:23:43,905 right? I don't want some airy 562 00:23:43,939 --> 00:23:46,355 fairy nuns coming here.. What.. Thank you. 563 00:23:46,390 --> 00:23:48,116 - Lovely fillet. - That's wonderful. 564 00:23:48,150 --> 00:23:49,807 Ab.. Compliments to the chef. 565 00:23:49,842 --> 00:23:51,602 - Yeah, very nice. - I will, certain. 566 00:23:51,637 --> 00:23:54,294 Ahem. Mr. Tim. 567 00:23:54,329 --> 00:23:56,020 - Thank you. - Is that your Christian name? 568 00:23:56,055 --> 00:23:57,470 Yes, it is. - Yes, good, good. 569 00:23:57,505 --> 00:23:58,885 Mr. Steve, Mr. Rob. 570 00:23:58,920 --> 00:24:00,335 - Nice to meet you. - Hello. 571 00:24:00,369 --> 00:24:01,957 He... he won't know who Basil Brush is. 572 00:24:01,992 --> 00:24:03,476 - Thank you. - Thank you. 573 00:24:03,511 --> 00:24:06,617 Now you listen to me, I wanna make sure it's not 574 00:24:06,652 --> 00:24:08,585 just airy fairy thinking. 575 00:24:08,619 --> 00:24:10,034 It's not a great Ray Winston. 576 00:24:10,069 --> 00:24:12,243 - I lost a part to him you know. - What's the.. 577 00:24:12,278 --> 00:24:13,762 - Seriously, we were... - Why was he.. 578 00:24:13,797 --> 00:24:15,661 We got.. I went.. That's what I thought. 579 00:24:15,695 --> 00:24:17,870 [speaking in foreign language] 580 00:24:20,355 --> 00:24:23,565 I saw you do Henry VIII once, which I thought was, I mean 581 00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:25,336 he's a great actor, but I thought that was odd. 582 00:24:25,360 --> 00:24:27,189 I gave him the cockney accent, didn't he? 583 00:24:27,224 --> 00:24:29,064 Yeah, he was Henry VIII with, with a cockney accent. 584 00:24:29,088 --> 00:24:31,677 I was like, I really fancied Anne Boleyn. 585 00:24:31,711 --> 00:24:33,472 I got this old trout on me back. 586 00:24:33,506 --> 00:24:35,519 Catherine of Aragon. Don't know what to do about it. 587 00:24:35,543 --> 00:24:36,761 - Sire... - I'm thinking of getting her. 588 00:24:36,785 --> 00:24:38,235 I wanna bag her, I wanna bed her. 589 00:24:38,269 --> 00:24:40,168 - Sire, might I interrupt? - I wanna do her. 590 00:24:40,202 --> 00:24:42,170 Uh, your, your new palace, Hampton Court 591 00:24:42,204 --> 00:24:44,275 is... is ready, sir, we've had the Jacuzzi put in 592 00:24:44,310 --> 00:24:46,036 would you like to inspect it? 593 00:24:46,070 --> 00:24:48,176 Fucking Pope's saying I can't get a fucking divorce. 594 00:24:48,210 --> 00:24:50,188 I'm saying what about if I say, well, I'm in charge? 595 00:24:50,212 --> 00:24:51,776 I'm the head of the church, how about that? 596 00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:53,157 What do you think about that then? 597 00:24:53,181 --> 00:24:54,572 How about I went round all your monasteries 598 00:24:54,596 --> 00:24:56,771 and fucking knocked the shit out of them? 599 00:24:56,805 --> 00:24:58,427 I mean, every single fucking one 600 00:24:58,462 --> 00:25:01,707 so I fucking level them, how about that, Mr. Fucking Pope? 601 00:25:01,741 --> 00:25:04,503 Your... Your Royal Highness, um, I, Ann... Anne Boleyn 602 00:25:04,537 --> 00:25:06,539 is... is waiting for you in the ante chamber 603 00:25:06,574 --> 00:25:08,241 Your Royal Highness, shall I bring her through? 604 00:25:08,265 --> 00:25:10,992 Yeah, that, yeah, I got a... a real boner, yeah. 605 00:25:11,026 --> 00:25:12,659 Yeah, I'm pleased to hear it, Your Royal Highness 606 00:25:12,683 --> 00:25:15,065 and might I say your one's royal boner is looking 607 00:25:15,099 --> 00:25:16,283 particularly majestic this morning. 608 00:25:16,307 --> 00:25:17,964 Yeah, cheers. I really like her. 609 00:25:17,999 --> 00:25:20,311 Take her to me, uh, chamber, or whatever you call it. 610 00:25:20,346 --> 00:25:22,141 Is sire speaking euphemistically? 611 00:25:22,175 --> 00:25:24,661 What? Why are you talking like a nonce? 612 00:25:24,695 --> 00:25:27,077 Because I'm terrified of you, sir. I'm not a nonce. 613 00:25:27,111 --> 00:25:29,700 I'm not a nonce, sir. I'm not a nonce. 614 00:25:29,735 --> 00:25:30,953 This is a rumor that has been put around 615 00:25:30,977 --> 00:25:32,323 the court by Cromwell. 616 00:25:32,358 --> 00:25:34,049 Alright, alright, alright, whatever. 617 00:25:34,084 --> 00:25:35,568 I really like Anne Boleyn. 618 00:25:35,603 --> 00:25:37,328 She's nice, she likes you, sir. 619 00:25:37,363 --> 00:25:40,159 If she messes me around, I'll chop her fucking head off. 620 00:25:40,193 --> 00:25:42,541 Literally chop her fucking head off. 621 00:25:42,575 --> 00:25:44,888 If she dicks me about, I'll get a swordsman 622 00:25:44,922 --> 00:25:46,406 over from France and... 623 00:25:46,441 --> 00:25:48,236 She can kneel and I can do it across her. 624 00:25:48,270 --> 00:25:52,136 That speaks so clearly of, of sire's class, sir 625 00:25:52,171 --> 00:25:55,174 to chop off milady's head with a swordsman. 626 00:25:56,727 --> 00:25:58,902 [speaking in foreign language] 627 00:26:01,490 --> 00:26:03,389 Hello. 628 00:26:03,423 --> 00:26:05,840 I don't like seeing my chin in this dome. 629 00:26:06,910 --> 00:26:08,567 - Thank you. - Your dessert. 630 00:26:08,601 --> 00:26:10,154 - Gentlemen. - Oh. 631 00:26:10,189 --> 00:26:12,432 We have the almond crumble with use of cream 632 00:26:12,467 --> 00:26:15,332 fresh citrus and blood orange on top of that, enjoy. 633 00:26:15,366 --> 00:26:16,620 - Thank you, thank you. - Thank you very much. 634 00:26:16,644 --> 00:26:17,644 My pleasure. 635 00:26:20,337 --> 00:26:22,650 Who would you be if you could be a Greek God? 636 00:26:22,684 --> 00:26:24,134 Which God would you be? 637 00:26:24,168 --> 00:26:25,387 I have been cast as a Greek God. 638 00:26:25,411 --> 00:26:26,654 When? 639 00:26:26,688 --> 00:26:28,632 I played Hades in Percy Jackson, "The Lightning Thief." 640 00:26:28,656 --> 00:26:30,047 Yes, in Percy Jackson, "The Lightning Thief." 641 00:26:30,071 --> 00:26:33,005 Yes. They made more of those films. 642 00:26:33,039 --> 00:26:35,352 - Hmm, hmm. - What happened to Hades? 643 00:26:35,386 --> 00:26:36,640 They just didn't invite me back. 644 00:26:36,664 --> 00:26:38,458 [phone rings] 645 00:26:40,460 --> 00:26:41,634 Hello, Joe? 646 00:26:41,669 --> 00:26:43,325 Joe? 647 00:26:43,360 --> 00:26:45,431 - Hey, dad, how are you? - Good, good. 648 00:26:45,465 --> 00:26:47,675 - What's going on? - Yeah, um.. 649 00:26:47,709 --> 00:26:48,848 Grandad's in hospital again. 650 00:26:48,883 --> 00:26:50,609 What? 651 00:26:50,643 --> 00:26:53,266 Yeah, um, so, yeah, I've been to see him, and he's okay. 652 00:26:53,301 --> 00:26:56,235 But what, what, okay, so what is it, the same thing as before? 653 00:26:56,269 --> 00:26:59,031 Yeah, yeah, yeah, same thing as before, it's, uh 654 00:26:59,065 --> 00:27:01,723 it's all routine, they're doing some tests. 655 00:27:01,758 --> 00:27:03,459 - Your check, sir. - Oh, thank you very much. 656 00:27:03,483 --> 00:27:05,013 - Did you like the dessert? - Yeah, it was lovely. 657 00:27:05,037 --> 00:27:06,866 I... I can't eat citrus, so I had to leave it. 658 00:27:06,901 --> 00:27:08,937 - Thank you. - Oh, that's okay. 659 00:27:08,972 --> 00:27:10,663 I'm glad you're there, yeah. 660 00:27:10,698 --> 00:27:12,665 - I'm at mum's actually, um.. - Okay. 661 00:27:12,700 --> 00:27:16,773 Philip's moved out, he's, he's left her, so, um.. 662 00:27:16,807 --> 00:27:18,567 Philip? 663 00:27:18,602 --> 00:27:20,639 Yeah, Philip, her... her partner. 664 00:27:20,673 --> 00:27:22,226 - Well, her boyfriend. - Oh, yeah. 665 00:27:22,261 --> 00:27:23,618 He's been living with her for two years. 666 00:27:23,642 --> 00:27:25,505 Yeah, yeah, I... I think I met him, yeah. 667 00:27:25,540 --> 00:27:28,301 A very good evening to you and welcome to this very special 668 00:27:28,336 --> 00:27:31,546 Greek edition of Guess the Bill coming to you from the beautiful 669 00:27:31,580 --> 00:27:34,583 Greek island of Beach here in the northernmost part 670 00:27:34,618 --> 00:27:37,586 of Southern Greece, and, uh, joining us to play tonight 671 00:27:37,621 --> 00:27:40,313 is our returning champion from Peventry in the North of England 672 00:27:40,348 --> 00:27:42,143 it's Stephen Coogan, Steve. 673 00:27:42,177 --> 00:27:44,041 Good evening. Ur, hello. 674 00:27:44,076 --> 00:27:47,044 Um, uh, uh, if you need me to come back, uh, just let me know 675 00:27:47,079 --> 00:27:49,253 I'll jump on a plane, alright? 676 00:27:49,288 --> 00:27:50,496 Okay, I love you. 677 00:27:50,530 --> 00:27:52,671 Love you too, dad, bye-bye. 678 00:27:52,705 --> 00:27:54,465 And the wonderful thing about it, Steve 679 00:27:54,500 --> 00:27:57,227 is you never pick another person up on what they're doing. 680 00:27:57,261 --> 00:27:59,712 No, it would literally never occur. 681 00:27:59,747 --> 00:28:02,991 Oh, here he is, the man himself, Stephen. 682 00:28:03,026 --> 00:28:04,717 On this beautiful beachside setting 683 00:28:04,752 --> 00:28:07,409 would you like to play "Guess the Bill?" 684 00:28:07,444 --> 00:28:08,825 [sighs] 685 00:28:08,859 --> 00:28:10,309 Not really, no. 686 00:28:10,343 --> 00:28:12,967 Alright, it's 307 euro. 687 00:28:14,244 --> 00:28:16,625 [instrumental music] 688 00:28:29,293 --> 00:28:30,743 Hey, Chloe, it's daddy. 689 00:28:30,778 --> 00:28:32,745 - Hi. - Hi. 690 00:28:32,780 --> 00:28:34,643 How are you? 691 00:28:34,678 --> 00:28:36,438 - Good. - Good, what you up to? 692 00:28:36,473 --> 00:28:39,234 Just watching some stuff on my iPad. 693 00:28:39,269 --> 00:28:41,512 And where's Charlie? 694 00:28:41,547 --> 00:28:44,964 Charlie isn't here, he's sleeping right now. 695 00:28:44,999 --> 00:28:46,839 Alright, then let me speak straight to mummy then, darling 696 00:28:46,863 --> 00:28:48,968 and I'll, and I'll talk to you again tomorrow. 697 00:28:49,003 --> 00:28:52,213 - She's not here. - She's not there as well? 698 00:28:52,247 --> 00:28:53,662 Where... where is she? 699 00:28:53,697 --> 00:28:55,595 At, um, the theatre. 700 00:28:55,630 --> 00:28:58,771 Mummy's at the theatre, what's she gone to see at the theatre? 701 00:28:58,806 --> 00:29:00,635 I don't know. 702 00:29:00,669 --> 00:29:02,775 And who did she go with? 703 00:29:02,810 --> 00:29:05,088 Don't know that either. 704 00:29:05,122 --> 00:29:07,228 But you know she's gone to the theatre? 705 00:29:08,436 --> 00:29:10,196 - Yes. - Ah. 706 00:29:10,231 --> 00:29:11,508 Oh. Alright. 707 00:29:15,823 --> 00:29:17,410 Get a move on! 708 00:29:22,277 --> 00:29:23,762 Keep moving! 709 00:29:25,833 --> 00:29:27,248 Are you okay? 710 00:29:32,736 --> 00:29:34,082 You alright? 711 00:29:39,847 --> 00:29:41,158 Come through. 712 00:29:41,193 --> 00:29:43,195 Oh, husband that I love. 713 00:29:43,229 --> 00:29:46,646 Why do you choose to give in to such wild grief? 714 00:29:46,681 --> 00:29:48,165 Catherine! 715 00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:50,305 Farewell. 716 00:29:50,340 --> 00:29:55,517 And do not fail in your love for our son. 717 00:29:55,552 --> 00:29:58,072 [gasping] 718 00:30:04,872 --> 00:30:06,149 Oh. 719 00:30:08,668 --> 00:30:10,705 [groans] 720 00:30:16,538 --> 00:30:17,608 [sighs] 721 00:30:25,893 --> 00:30:27,273 [sighs] 722 00:30:29,103 --> 00:30:32,796 ♪ I solve my problems and I seen the light ♪ 723 00:30:32,831 --> 00:30:38,388 ♪ We got a loving thing we've gotta treat it right ♪ 724 00:30:38,422 --> 00:30:41,598 ♪ There ain't no danger we can go too far ♪ 725 00:30:41,632 --> 00:30:43,151 ♪ We start believing it now 726 00:30:43,186 --> 00:30:46,879 Are you singing "Grease" because we're in Greece? 727 00:30:46,914 --> 00:30:49,709 ♪ Greece is the word 728 00:30:49,744 --> 00:30:52,471 ♪ They think our love is just a growing thing ♪ 729 00:30:52,505 --> 00:30:53,862 You know that, you know that "Grease" 730 00:30:53,886 --> 00:30:55,577 is not about the country Greece? 731 00:30:55,612 --> 00:30:57,752 When I'm in Greece, I hear the word Greece 732 00:30:57,786 --> 00:30:59,133 I think "Grease." 733 00:30:59,167 --> 00:31:01,421 Yes, but it's not the same thing as it.. It's a homophone. 734 00:31:01,445 --> 00:31:02,526 - No, no, no. - It's a homophone. 735 00:31:02,550 --> 00:31:04,379 It's a.. How dare you? 736 00:31:04,414 --> 00:31:06,726 How dare you? 737 00:31:06,761 --> 00:31:07,831 I'm not a homophone. 738 00:31:07,866 --> 00:31:09,695 - I'm a heterosexual. - I'm a hetero.. 739 00:31:09,729 --> 00:31:13,872 I'm not, I'm a human being, um, good evening. 740 00:31:13,906 --> 00:31:16,253 Um, no, look, Steve, look, for... for me, Steve 741 00:31:16,288 --> 00:31:18,083 Greece is the word, yes 742 00:31:18,117 --> 00:31:19,394 it's the word that you heard 743 00:31:19,429 --> 00:31:20,924 it's got a groove, it's got a meaning. 744 00:31:20,948 --> 00:31:22,649 Greece is the time, it's the place, it's the motion. 745 00:31:22,673 --> 00:31:24,883 Well, Greece is the way we're feeling. 746 00:31:24,917 --> 00:31:25,953 Talk more about that. 747 00:31:25,987 --> 00:31:28,334 Expand on that. Um.. 748 00:31:28,369 --> 00:31:30,750 Do you know who wrote "Grease?" 749 00:31:30,785 --> 00:31:32,649 Steve Coogan, did you know who wrote "Grease?" 750 00:31:32,683 --> 00:31:34,109 - No, I don't know who... - It was Barry Gibbs. 751 00:31:34,133 --> 00:31:36,180 I know who, a lot of the writers from Ancient Greece are 752 00:31:36,204 --> 00:31:37,492 but I know that's not as important to you 753 00:31:37,516 --> 00:31:39,000 as who wrote the song "Grease." 754 00:31:39,035 --> 00:31:41,589 It was written by Barry Gibb, because Robert Stigwood 755 00:31:41,623 --> 00:31:43,832 the Bee Gees' manager, was producing the music. 756 00:31:43,867 --> 00:31:46,249 Now, the original stage musical, of course, it didn't have 757 00:31:46,283 --> 00:31:48,009 the song, "Grease," and Robbie said to Barry 758 00:31:48,044 --> 00:31:51,150 We're enjoying such great such with Saturday Night Fever 759 00:31:51,185 --> 00:31:54,119 the old records, the "Tragedy," uh.. 760 00:31:54,153 --> 00:31:56,811 Do you know who wrote that, uh do you know who wrote that 761 00:31:56,845 --> 00:31:58,168 a friend to everyone is a friend to no one? 762 00:31:58,192 --> 00:31:59,779 Yes, Aristotle. 763 00:31:59,814 --> 00:32:01,861 - Now, let me tell you this... - Only because I told you. 764 00:32:01,885 --> 00:32:03,231 No, I knew it already. 765 00:32:03,266 --> 00:32:05,716 No, you didn't, if you... you, you don't, you don't know 766 00:32:05,751 --> 00:32:08,823 you, you, you, you learn more about.. 767 00:32:08,857 --> 00:32:12,723 You know more about, uh, these irrelevant things like who wrote 768 00:32:12,758 --> 00:32:15,588 the song "Grease," these, these trivialities 769 00:32:15,623 --> 00:32:17,211 than anything to do with Ancient Greece 770 00:32:17,245 --> 00:32:21,491 other than what I've spoon-fed you over the last few days. 771 00:32:21,525 --> 00:32:24,183 ♪ Grease is the time it's the place ♪ 772 00:32:24,218 --> 00:32:25,702 ♪ It's the motion 773 00:32:25,736 --> 00:32:29,637 ♪ And Grease is the way we are feeling ♪ 774 00:32:30,431 --> 00:32:32,295 [rain pattering] 775 00:32:34,124 --> 00:32:36,885 You know the Greeks thought Delphi was the center 776 00:32:36,920 --> 00:32:39,785 of the world, literally the center of the Greek world. 777 00:32:39,819 --> 00:32:42,132 - The navel, as it were? - Yes. 778 00:32:42,167 --> 00:32:43,927 I think so. 779 00:32:43,962 --> 00:32:47,517 And they had a, a cave 780 00:32:47,551 --> 00:32:50,451 the woman in the cave sitting on a tripod 781 00:32:50,485 --> 00:32:53,972 with um, smoke coming up underneath her. 782 00:32:54,006 --> 00:32:55,708 They'd have a, they'd have a prophet there to interpret 783 00:32:55,732 --> 00:32:57,158 she would then, the smoke would come up 784 00:32:57,182 --> 00:32:59,391 and she'd start going.. 785 00:32:59,425 --> 00:33:01,876 And, uh, they'd have a prophet to interpret 786 00:33:01,910 --> 00:33:04,534 what she was saying, and the people believed 787 00:33:04,568 --> 00:33:08,400 that it was Apollo sending his words up in smoke 788 00:33:08,434 --> 00:33:11,472 through her vagina, and out of her mouth. 789 00:33:12,714 --> 00:33:15,510 And she was the Priestess Pythia. 790 00:33:16,787 --> 00:33:18,351 Well, aren't you going to make a joke about it? 791 00:33:18,375 --> 00:33:19,894 No. 792 00:33:19,928 --> 00:33:22,897 If I did, it wouldn't be one of my pithier comments. 793 00:33:22,931 --> 00:33:25,451 Ha. I knew there was something lurking in there somewhere. 794 00:33:25,486 --> 00:33:28,937 Probably where the phrase, "Blowing smoke up 795 00:33:28,972 --> 00:33:30,249 your arse" comes from. 796 00:33:30,284 --> 00:33:33,045 It's a, it's a vagina, it was a vagina, not her arse. 797 00:33:33,080 --> 00:33:35,013 I hope you know the difference by now, Rob. 798 00:33:36,186 --> 00:33:37,739 God help your wife. 799 00:33:37,774 --> 00:33:39,303 I bet she doesn't know which way to turn. 800 00:33:39,327 --> 00:33:41,812 Now, this here is the stone that 801 00:33:41,847 --> 00:33:44,608 Zeus dropped to signify the center of the world. 802 00:33:44,643 --> 00:33:47,094 The navel of the world just there. 803 00:33:47,128 --> 00:33:49,820 Looks more like a clitoris though, doesn't it? 804 00:33:49,855 --> 00:33:51,729 It does though, it looks more like a giant clit. 805 00:33:51,753 --> 00:33:54,687 Well, that's just, that's almost certainly deliberate. 806 00:33:54,722 --> 00:33:57,587 This was a shrine to the female, to... to Gaya 807 00:33:57,621 --> 00:34:00,417 Mother Earth, the creative. 808 00:34:00,452 --> 00:34:03,213 And, uh, until, of course, Apollo came along 809 00:34:03,248 --> 00:34:07,355 claimed all the credit for himself, surprise, surprise. 810 00:34:07,390 --> 00:34:09,668 It was ever thus, the patriarchy, uh 811 00:34:09,702 --> 00:34:12,533 claim, claiming credit. 812 00:34:12,567 --> 00:34:14,673 Very spiritual, isn't it? 813 00:34:14,707 --> 00:34:15,570 Yeah. 814 00:34:15,605 --> 00:34:17,572 [thunder rumbles] 815 00:34:20,955 --> 00:34:22,612 [bell tolling] 816 00:34:24,407 --> 00:34:27,548 Michelin starred Varoulko seaside 817 00:34:27,582 --> 00:34:30,999 in Piraeus, Athens, is widely regarded 818 00:34:31,034 --> 00:34:35,797 heh, as Greece's top seafood restaurant. 819 00:34:39,422 --> 00:34:41,976 [indistinct chatter] 820 00:34:45,911 --> 00:34:47,430 Well, it's very nice, isn't it? 821 00:34:47,464 --> 00:34:49,639 This is, uh, not what I expected of Athens 822 00:34:49,673 --> 00:34:51,779 I was thinking hot and dusty and not wet... 823 00:34:51,813 --> 00:34:54,782 Not, well, uh, this is exactly what I expected of 824 00:34:54,816 --> 00:34:56,577 of Athens, because lots of boats 825 00:34:56,611 --> 00:34:58,337 because it's a, it was a naval power. 826 00:34:58,372 --> 00:35:00,408 Uh, the... the Athenian Navy defeated 827 00:35:00,443 --> 00:35:03,687 the Persians in the Battle of Salamis. 828 00:35:03,722 --> 00:35:06,483 - The Battle of Salamis? - Yeah. 829 00:35:06,518 --> 00:35:08,668 So are you gonna do something about two guys with salamis 830 00:35:08,692 --> 00:35:10,142 hitting each other on the head? 831 00:35:10,177 --> 00:35:12,075 Or the fact that salami's a bit like cocks? 832 00:35:12,110 --> 00:35:13,708 Yeah, no, no, I wasn't gonna go there, but.. 833 00:35:13,732 --> 00:35:15,192 Really? Well, the Battle of Salami's.. 834 00:35:15,216 --> 00:35:16,976 The Battle of Salami's. 835 00:35:17,011 --> 00:35:20,532 Yeah, but they had Battle of, um, Marathon not far from here 836 00:35:20,566 --> 00:35:22,085 that wasn't a naval battle, was it? 837 00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:23,580 I didn't say all the battles were naval. 838 00:35:23,604 --> 00:35:25,847 And that's where we get the marathon from. 839 00:35:25,882 --> 00:35:28,367 It was a guy, a soldier, came, he ran 840 00:35:28,402 --> 00:35:31,577 from the Battle at Marathon, all the way back to Athens. 841 00:35:31,612 --> 00:35:34,028 And then, you won't know this, he dropped dead. 842 00:35:34,062 --> 00:35:35,719 And what did he shout just before he died? 843 00:35:35,754 --> 00:35:37,721 He said, "I've got shooting pains down my arm 844 00:35:37,756 --> 00:35:39,275 and sort of followed by a crushing 845 00:35:39,309 --> 00:35:40,517 feeling across my chest." 846 00:35:40,552 --> 00:35:42,450 - No, no, Nike! - Please. 847 00:35:42,485 --> 00:35:44,107 What? Thank you very much. 848 00:35:44,142 --> 00:35:47,455 [indistinct] 849 00:35:47,490 --> 00:35:48,801 Thank you very much. 850 00:35:48,836 --> 00:35:50,365 And a premium salad from white grouper. 851 00:35:50,389 --> 00:35:52,184 Boiled eggs and brioche, crispy. 852 00:35:52,219 --> 00:35:54,048 - Thank you, thank you. - Bon appetite. 853 00:35:54,082 --> 00:35:55,153 Thank you. 854 00:35:55,187 --> 00:35:57,465 Uh, he shout, he shouted, "Nike!" 855 00:35:57,500 --> 00:35:59,191 He had a sponsorship deal, he wanted to 856 00:35:59,226 --> 00:36:00,813 thank the guys at Nike. 857 00:36:00,848 --> 00:36:03,609 No, he shouted Nike 'cause Nike is the Goddess of Victory. 858 00:36:03,644 --> 00:36:06,267 [utensils clattering] 859 00:36:06,302 --> 00:36:07,993 [indistinct chatter] 860 00:36:09,477 --> 00:36:11,099 Have you ever run a marathon? 861 00:36:11,134 --> 00:36:13,205 No, of course not, no. 862 00:36:13,240 --> 00:36:15,207 - I have. - Really? 863 00:36:15,242 --> 00:36:17,002 If you died at the end of a marathon 864 00:36:17,036 --> 00:36:20,523 I would gladly try and resuscitate you, you know, to.. 865 00:36:20,557 --> 00:36:22,086 What are you doing, waving goodbye to me? 866 00:36:22,110 --> 00:36:25,044 No, I'm pressing your chest, and staying alive. 867 00:36:25,079 --> 00:36:27,333 That, you don't do that, you don't, you... you don't pat us 868 00:36:27,357 --> 00:36:29,428 pat someone on the back. 869 00:36:29,463 --> 00:36:32,638 Arms together. Elbows locked. 870 00:36:32,673 --> 00:36:35,779 Push down, 30 chest compressions, 30. 871 00:36:35,814 --> 00:36:37,091 And you count them. 872 00:36:37,125 --> 00:36:38,334 One, two, three 873 00:36:38,368 --> 00:36:39,921 four, five, six.. 874 00:36:39,956 --> 00:36:41,544 ♪ Staying alive staying alive 875 00:36:41,578 --> 00:36:43,235 ...ten, you do thirty of those. 876 00:36:43,270 --> 00:36:45,375 ♪ Steve's gonna die Steve's gonna die ♪ 877 00:36:45,410 --> 00:36:47,205 - Then two breaths. - Yeah. 878 00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:50,587 Pinch the nose, head back, two breaths, not your nose. 879 00:36:50,622 --> 00:36:52,186 The nose of the person you're breathing into their mouth. 880 00:36:52,210 --> 00:36:53,808 - Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. - Head back. 881 00:36:53,832 --> 00:36:55,085 - We've lost him. - So something around his neck. 882 00:36:55,109 --> 00:36:56,317 What happened? We've lost him. 883 00:36:56,352 --> 00:36:58,423 But I'm pinching my nose. 884 00:36:58,457 --> 00:36:59,907 Not your nose, you idiot. 885 00:36:59,941 --> 00:37:02,081 Well, it's 'cause you make people laugh 886 00:37:02,116 --> 00:37:04,705 and while losing valuable seconds, that will be good. 887 00:37:04,739 --> 00:37:06,016 What if you found it funny 888 00:37:06,051 --> 00:37:07,742 and you sprung back to life laughing? 889 00:37:07,777 --> 00:37:10,124 Well, I... I'd have to be conscious for that to 890 00:37:10,158 --> 00:37:12,747 uh, to happen, so, so if I'm conscious, then there's no need 891 00:37:12,782 --> 00:37:14,242 to resuscitate me, it doesn't make sense, so.. 892 00:37:14,266 --> 00:37:15,726 Alright, I'm banging your chest, can I break a rib? 893 00:37:15,750 --> 00:37:16,969 Would you mind if I broke a rib? 894 00:37:16,993 --> 00:37:18,270 Two breaths, then thirty more. 895 00:37:18,305 --> 00:37:20,376 One, two, three, four. 896 00:37:20,410 --> 00:37:24,276 ♪ Ah ah ah ah Steve's gonna die Steve's gonna die ♪ 897 00:37:24,311 --> 00:37:27,900 Yeah, and why, why do they say do it to the, to the beat 898 00:37:27,935 --> 00:37:29,523 of, uh, the Bee Gees, why? 899 00:37:29,557 --> 00:37:32,018 Because it's the number of beats per minute is, is the exact... 900 00:37:32,042 --> 00:37:33,123 And how many beats per minute is it? 901 00:37:33,147 --> 00:37:34,735 - A hundred and twenty. - Yes. 902 00:37:34,769 --> 00:37:36,357 'Cause that's the classic disco beat. 903 00:37:36,392 --> 00:37:38,083 Yes, I know. 904 00:37:38,117 --> 00:37:40,061 Then we've got a very dangerous area because then it might 905 00:37:40,085 --> 00:37:42,294 be time to try mouth to mouth. 906 00:37:42,329 --> 00:37:45,297 And I would not be comfortable with that. 907 00:37:45,332 --> 00:37:47,817 I'm glad. I'm glad you wouldn't be comfortable with that. 908 00:37:47,851 --> 00:37:49,312 I would, I would, I would find it hard 909 00:37:49,336 --> 00:37:50,647 to press my lips to yours. 910 00:37:50,682 --> 00:37:52,176 I'm glad you wouldn't be comfortable with it 911 00:37:52,200 --> 00:37:55,618 'cause I enjoy it more when you don't enjoy it. 912 00:37:55,652 --> 00:37:57,861 [laughing] 913 00:38:04,592 --> 00:38:06,939 Marathon man, Hoffman, Dustin Hoffman 914 00:38:06,974 --> 00:38:08,572 Laurence Olivier, they're very different actors. 915 00:38:08,596 --> 00:38:11,185 Olivier acts from the outside in, he's not a method actor 916 00:38:11,219 --> 00:38:14,947 never was, he likes to look in the mirror 917 00:38:14,982 --> 00:38:17,329 and look like someone different. 918 00:38:17,364 --> 00:38:20,056 And then make that the basis of his character. 919 00:38:20,090 --> 00:38:22,541 - Whereas Dustin is.. - Dustin would like that. 920 00:38:22,576 --> 00:38:23,784 I think I'm quite like Dustin. 921 00:38:23,818 --> 00:38:25,786 I'm not short. I don't like Dustin. 922 00:38:25,820 --> 00:38:27,177 Yeah, well, that, that's Dustin Hoffman. 923 00:38:27,201 --> 00:38:28,961 - Oh. - Oh, yeah, Dustin. 924 00:38:28,996 --> 00:38:30,169 Oh. 925 00:38:30,204 --> 00:38:31,837 Mrs. Robinson, are you trying to seduce me? 926 00:38:31,861 --> 00:38:34,864 Are you trying to seduce me, Mrs. Robinson? 927 00:38:34,898 --> 00:38:37,004 Mrs. Robinson, are you trying to seduce me? 928 00:38:37,038 --> 00:38:39,489 Then what would you choose next? 929 00:38:39,524 --> 00:38:40,804 I'll tell you, "Midnight Cowboy." 930 00:38:40,835 --> 00:38:42,561 Why did he choose that? John Schlesinger. 931 00:38:42,596 --> 00:38:43,676 'Cause it was so different. 932 00:38:43,700 --> 00:38:45,012 Who did he play? Ratso? Ritso? 933 00:38:45,046 --> 00:38:46,541 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Who was opposite him? 934 00:38:46,565 --> 00:38:48,118 - John Voight. - John Voight, yeah. 935 00:38:48,153 --> 00:38:49,786 John Voight's a Trump supporter, mad Trump supporter. 936 00:38:49,810 --> 00:38:51,121 But we didn't know that then. 937 00:38:51,156 --> 00:38:52,571 John Voight says 938 00:38:52,606 --> 00:38:55,954 "Well, hell, I'm a hustler, you didn't know that?" 939 00:38:55,988 --> 00:38:57,759 And Dustin says, "Well, how am I supposed to know that? 940 00:38:57,783 --> 00:38:59,382 You've gotta tell the person these things. 941 00:38:59,406 --> 00:39:01,511 I mean, I understand, the broad starts crying 942 00:39:01,546 --> 00:39:02,823 I cut my heart out for her. 943 00:39:02,857 --> 00:39:04,514 You will meet my friend O'Daniel." 944 00:39:04,549 --> 00:39:06,930 - Can you do an interpret? - I haven't finished doing it. 945 00:39:06,965 --> 00:39:09,899 "You will meet my friend O'Daniel, he runs a business.." 946 00:39:09,933 --> 00:39:11,521 I still haven't finished. 947 00:39:11,556 --> 00:39:14,386 "You will meet my O'Daniel, he runs the biggest.." 948 00:39:14,421 --> 00:39:17,734 Now I'm getting it wrong 'cause you get in my fricking way. 949 00:39:17,769 --> 00:39:20,116 I'm walking here, I'm walking here. 950 00:39:20,150 --> 00:39:22,808 Well, I'm talking here, let me finish this thing right now. 951 00:39:22,843 --> 00:39:24,292 "You'll meet my friend O'Daniel 952 00:39:24,327 --> 00:39:26,398 he runs the biggest stable in the whole goddamn 953 00:39:26,433 --> 00:39:27,572 metropolitan area." 954 00:39:27,606 --> 00:39:30,678 It's crazy, a stud like you paying. 955 00:39:30,713 --> 00:39:33,129 And then there was "Tootsie," of course. 956 00:39:33,163 --> 00:39:34,026 I knew that. 957 00:39:34,061 --> 00:39:35,407 Michael, nobody will employ you 958 00:39:35,442 --> 00:39:37,109 you played a tomato, they went two days over 959 00:39:37,133 --> 00:39:38,721 'cause you wouldn't sit down. 960 00:39:38,755 --> 00:39:41,137 I'm a woman, I... I don't like the way you speak to women. 961 00:39:41,171 --> 00:39:43,011 If you say that again to me, I'm gonna knock your balls 962 00:39:43,035 --> 00:39:45,106 right through the roof of your mouth. 963 00:39:45,141 --> 00:39:46,418 I'm not Dorothy Michaels. 964 00:39:46,453 --> 00:39:47,730 I... I'm not Dorothy Michaels. 965 00:39:47,764 --> 00:39:49,628 - I'm Michael Dorsey. - Michael Dorsey. 966 00:39:49,663 --> 00:39:51,492 [laughs] 967 00:39:51,527 --> 00:39:53,391 [speaking in a foreign language] 968 00:39:55,427 --> 00:39:56,980 I'm an excellent driver. 969 00:39:57,015 --> 00:39:58,889 - I'm gonna, yeah, okay. - I'm an excellent driver. 970 00:39:58,913 --> 00:40:00,398 - Can you do.. - Oh. 971 00:40:00,432 --> 00:40:02,710 Can you do, uh, a Godzilla 972 00:40:02,745 --> 00:40:05,161 animation in a film? 973 00:40:05,195 --> 00:40:06,749 Kind of like the stock film animation. 974 00:40:06,783 --> 00:40:08,371 - No. - Okay, watch me. 975 00:40:09,165 --> 00:40:10,891 [roaring] 976 00:40:21,764 --> 00:40:22,937 It's very good, isn't it? 977 00:40:22,972 --> 00:40:24,836 I still prefer your Neil Kinnock. 978 00:40:24,870 --> 00:40:26,182 - Um.. - If I had to choose. 979 00:40:26,216 --> 00:40:27,539 If I had to choose with a gun to my head. 980 00:40:27,563 --> 00:40:29,737 And can you.. I can do dubbing films where 981 00:40:29,772 --> 00:40:31,118 the voice doesn't matter. 982 00:40:31,152 --> 00:40:32,809 - Yeah, you've done this before. - I know. 983 00:40:32,844 --> 00:40:34,501 It was good though, watch. 984 00:40:34,535 --> 00:40:35,778 - Are you gonna do it? - Yeah. 985 00:40:35,812 --> 00:40:38,919 Um.. Don't be ridiculous. 986 00:40:38,953 --> 00:40:41,473 And I told you time and time again 987 00:40:41,508 --> 00:40:44,545 every time you come here, your voice doesn't suit you at all 988 00:40:44,580 --> 00:40:46,340 and when you lose your temper 989 00:40:46,374 --> 00:40:47,755 it should be like this. 990 00:40:47,790 --> 00:40:49,274 Hey, you! 991 00:40:49,308 --> 00:40:50,586 You're a fool. 992 00:40:50,620 --> 00:40:51,828 [laughs] 993 00:40:51,863 --> 00:40:53,692 Fair enough. 994 00:40:53,727 --> 00:40:55,211 In "The Marathon Man", of course 995 00:40:55,245 --> 00:40:57,144 in... in that scene where you said, is it safe? 996 00:40:57,178 --> 00:41:01,217 Is it safe? Is it safe? 997 00:41:01,251 --> 00:41:02,494 Yes, it's safe. 998 00:41:02,529 --> 00:41:04,127 Oh, yes, it's safe, oh, yes, it's very, very safe. 999 00:41:04,151 --> 00:41:06,291 Are you in both parts. 1000 00:41:06,325 --> 00:41:07,188 Is it safe? 1001 00:41:07,223 --> 00:41:09,397 It's safe, it's safe, yeah. 1002 00:41:09,432 --> 00:41:11,676 Does this hurt? 1003 00:41:11,710 --> 00:41:14,264 You have a cavity at the back. 1004 00:41:14,299 --> 00:41:15,966 Ha, but see, this is where you got it wrong. 1005 00:41:15,990 --> 00:41:17,475 'Cause he doesn't do that. 1006 00:41:17,509 --> 00:41:19,822 The whole point is, he doesn't go, ugh, does he? 1007 00:41:19,856 --> 00:41:21,513 He's very, that's what makes it scary. 1008 00:41:21,548 --> 00:41:24,447 'Cause he does it ever so gently, like he's like a dentist. 1009 00:41:24,482 --> 00:41:27,208 And that's why he's ahead, because he's so.. 1010 00:41:27,243 --> 00:41:30,004 Now, try it again, Steve. I want you for this part. 1011 00:41:30,039 --> 00:41:32,904 - But at the moment... - You have a slight cavity. 1012 00:41:34,077 --> 00:41:36,045 - Just.. - Oh! 1013 00:41:36,079 --> 00:41:38,565 Oh, oh, oh, and then you get the oil of cloves. 1014 00:41:38,599 --> 00:41:40,946 - Yes. Simple oil of cloves. - But you do it very caringly. 1015 00:41:40,981 --> 00:41:43,846 - Very caringly. - Simple oil of cloves. 1016 00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:45,123 Oh, oh. 1017 00:41:45,157 --> 00:41:47,263 It makes it so much better. 1018 00:41:47,297 --> 00:41:48,885 [panting] 1019 00:41:48,920 --> 00:41:50,818 It's, it's not safe, it's not safe. 1020 00:41:50,853 --> 00:41:52,164 Very dangerous. 1021 00:41:52,199 --> 00:41:54,512 [imitating drill whirring] 1022 00:41:54,546 --> 00:41:55,799 What are you doing there? Are you drilling? 1023 00:41:55,823 --> 00:41:57,204 Yeah. 1024 00:41:57,238 --> 00:41:59,517 [imitating drill whirring] 1025 00:42:03,037 --> 00:42:06,247 Phew. I'm now lightheaded. Seriously. 1026 00:42:06,282 --> 00:42:08,087 Yeah, that was, that was, that was actually quite good. 1027 00:42:08,111 --> 00:42:09,596 It was good, I'll do it again. 1028 00:42:09,630 --> 00:42:12,184 [imitating drill whirring] 1029 00:42:18,328 --> 00:42:19,985 [laughing] 1030 00:42:21,469 --> 00:42:23,299 And now from deep inside Dustin's mouth 1031 00:42:23,333 --> 00:42:26,474 comes this, comes this, comes this.. 1032 00:42:26,509 --> 00:42:28,280 Help me, get me out of here, I'm a tiny tooth. 1033 00:42:28,304 --> 00:42:30,340 I can't get out of Dustin Hoffman's mouth. 1034 00:42:30,375 --> 00:42:33,654 Oh, my God. I'm a molar and I can't get out of Dustin's mouth. 1035 00:42:33,689 --> 00:42:37,175 He thinks he's some sort of wise guy, but he's not. 1036 00:42:39,936 --> 00:42:41,662 I just don't know why you dubbed. 1037 00:42:41,697 --> 00:42:43,537 Well, I don't know, why are you a small man in a box? 1038 00:42:43,561 --> 00:42:46,218 Well, it's a funny notion, but I'm not, I'm small, I'm small... 1039 00:42:46,253 --> 00:42:48,669 It's a funny notion that.. It's a funny notion that someone 1040 00:42:48,704 --> 00:42:51,085 might walk round in real life being dubbed. 1041 00:42:51,120 --> 00:42:52,994 - Yeah, but, but then... - It doesn't make sense. 1042 00:42:53,018 --> 00:42:54,917 In this instance, we're in a.. 1043 00:42:54,951 --> 00:42:56,574 Because we're in a dental setting. 1044 00:42:56,608 --> 00:42:59,024 And a man's trapped in a box, why in a dentist? 1045 00:42:59,059 --> 00:43:01,509 A tooth is trapped in a mouth. 1046 00:43:01,544 --> 00:43:02,925 And the tooth talks? 1047 00:43:02,959 --> 00:43:04,754 I'm trapped inside Dustin Hoffman's mouth. 1048 00:43:04,789 --> 00:43:06,791 Well, this is where your claim for logic 1049 00:43:06,825 --> 00:43:08,516 falls to the ground, Mr. Rob Brydon. 1050 00:43:08,551 --> 00:43:11,002 There's no possible way of, uh, offering 1051 00:43:11,036 --> 00:43:12,348 an explanation for that. 1052 00:43:12,382 --> 00:43:13,487 Case dismissed. 1053 00:43:16,386 --> 00:43:19,700 So, it's your first visit in, uh, our hotel, sir? 1054 00:43:19,735 --> 00:43:22,358 Uh, first visit to this hotel, yes, but I've been to Athens 1055 00:43:22,392 --> 00:43:23,680 though, a couple of times before. 1056 00:43:23,704 --> 00:43:26,051 - Hello. - Hello. 1057 00:43:26,086 --> 00:43:29,020 - How are you? - Nice to hear your voice. 1058 00:43:29,054 --> 00:43:30,711 Hey, Greg, how you doing? 1059 00:43:30,746 --> 00:43:32,033 I'm very good, very good, how are you? 1060 00:43:32,057 --> 00:43:33,645 Uh, good, good, yeah, great. 1061 00:43:33,680 --> 00:43:35,312 How's Rob? Is he keeping you on your toes? 1062 00:43:35,336 --> 00:43:37,131 He's a very, he's a very funny man 1063 00:43:37,166 --> 00:43:38,995 he really, really does make me laugh. 1064 00:43:39,030 --> 00:43:40,963 Yes, he's very funny, yes. 1065 00:43:40,997 --> 00:43:42,447 What, uh, what can I do for you? 1066 00:43:42,481 --> 00:43:45,243 Is there any news on the Damien Chazelle film? 1067 00:43:45,277 --> 00:43:48,073 Yes, uh, yes, but it's a no, I'm afraid 1068 00:43:48,108 --> 00:43:50,558 from them, they do, they loved you 1069 00:43:50,593 --> 00:43:53,285 they... they thought what you did was absolutely fantastic. 1070 00:43:53,320 --> 00:43:56,185 I cry, I cried and, uh, I did the whole.. 1071 00:43:56,219 --> 00:43:58,187 I mean, I did the whole bit. 1072 00:43:58,221 --> 00:44:00,948 Yeah, I know, though, though the crying was, was great 1073 00:44:00,983 --> 00:44:02,640 they... they mentioned they loved it. 1074 00:44:02,674 --> 00:44:08,059 Listen, I've had an idea, why don't you, at the end of this 1075 00:44:08,093 --> 00:44:10,199 which is Ithaca, why don't you come out 1076 00:44:10,233 --> 00:44:13,996 and you and I could have a few days together? 1077 00:44:18,932 --> 00:44:21,175 [indistinct chatter] 1078 00:44:23,177 --> 00:44:25,007 - Hello. - Ah, there they are. Hello. 1079 00:44:25,041 --> 00:44:27,319 - Hey. - Alright? 1080 00:44:27,354 --> 00:44:28,952 - Nice to see you. - Nice to see you again. 1081 00:44:28,976 --> 00:44:30,184 Nice to see you too. 1082 00:44:30,219 --> 00:44:32,462 - You alright? Thanks. - Very good. 1083 00:44:32,497 --> 00:44:35,949 - Good. Nice to see you. - You look fantastic. 1084 00:44:35,983 --> 00:44:38,192 - Right, photograph. - Yes. 1085 00:44:38,227 --> 00:44:40,988 - At the Epidaurus, the theatre. - Mm-hmm. 1086 00:44:41,023 --> 00:44:43,163 Since Greece is the birthplace of drama. 1087 00:44:43,197 --> 00:44:45,027 - Good. - A bit on the nose. 1088 00:44:45,061 --> 00:44:46,511 Steve, it was your idea. 1089 00:44:47,305 --> 00:44:49,031 - Was it? - Yeah. 1090 00:44:49,065 --> 00:44:50,618 Uh, right, let's do it. 1091 00:44:50,653 --> 00:44:51,827 Okay. 1092 00:44:51,861 --> 00:44:54,415 [dramatic music] 1093 00:44:57,556 --> 00:45:01,215 This is, um, hot, if I was looking for one word. 1094 00:45:01,250 --> 00:45:03,631 To describe this weather, you'd be hard.. 1095 00:45:03,666 --> 00:45:05,461 [indistinct chatter] 1096 00:45:05,495 --> 00:45:09,327 Mad dogs, Englishmen and, uh, Welshmen. 1097 00:45:09,361 --> 00:45:11,985 - Oh, it's very hot. - I know it's hot. 1098 00:45:12,019 --> 00:45:14,712 - Masks? - Comedy? Tragedy? 1099 00:45:14,746 --> 00:45:17,093 This is, they look like BAFTAs, is that the idea? 1100 00:45:17,128 --> 00:45:19,520 - It does look like a BAFTA. - Here we are, you're on familiar ground. 1101 00:45:19,544 --> 00:45:21,477 I've got tragedy, are you happy with that? 1102 00:45:21,511 --> 00:45:23,410 Um, I don't know, what do you reckon? 1103 00:45:23,444 --> 00:45:24,687 - I'd go with that. - Comedy. 1104 00:45:24,722 --> 00:45:26,240 You're know as a titan of comedy. 1105 00:45:26,275 --> 00:45:27,621 I should have the smile 1106 00:45:27,655 --> 00:45:29,450 because of the number of BAFTAs I've won. 1107 00:45:29,485 --> 00:45:31,221 And I should have the frown 'cause I've spent 1108 00:45:31,245 --> 00:45:32,602 a week with you. Come on, let's do it. 1109 00:45:32,626 --> 00:45:35,836 On the other hand, Rob is known for 1110 00:45:35,871 --> 00:45:38,218 accessible light entertainment. 1111 00:45:38,252 --> 00:45:39,667 Smiley face. 1112 00:45:39,702 --> 00:45:44,534 And I'm now known for, uh, dramatic roles. 1113 00:45:44,569 --> 00:45:48,297 Ah, because I got a BAFTA nomination for 1114 00:45:48,331 --> 00:45:49,885 playing Stan Laurel. 1115 00:45:49,919 --> 00:45:52,853 For impersonating a comedian. So we give it back to you. 1116 00:45:52,888 --> 00:45:54,658 Yeah, I wasn't really impersonating a comedian, though 1117 00:45:54,682 --> 00:45:57,099 because BAFTA, the nomination was for best acting.. 1118 00:45:57,133 --> 00:45:58,134 It certainly was. 1119 00:45:58,169 --> 00:45:59,549 ...in a drama. 1120 00:45:59,584 --> 00:46:01,068 Guys, can you take off the hats? 1121 00:46:01,103 --> 00:46:02,518 - What? - Hats. Lose the hats. 1122 00:46:02,552 --> 00:46:04,382 Right, I'm gonna burn without a hat. 1123 00:46:04,416 --> 00:46:05,935 Okay, we will do it quick. 1124 00:46:05,970 --> 00:46:07,775 - I'm not sure about... - Why is he on a higher level? 1125 00:46:07,799 --> 00:46:10,112 This is just exacerbating the height thing. 1126 00:46:10,146 --> 00:46:11,596 You can go on the same level. 1127 00:46:11,630 --> 00:46:13,701 I don't think Rob can be on the same level. 1128 00:46:13,736 --> 00:46:15,289 Oh, he's talking physically, I see. 1129 00:46:15,324 --> 00:46:17,326 I've got it, okay, yep, yep, yep, yep. 1130 00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:18,983 Try and do like that proper Greek actors 1131 00:46:19,017 --> 00:46:20,985 like a proper drama. 1132 00:46:21,019 --> 00:46:23,687 As if we're all Greek actors. Right, I'll stab you. That will come easy. 1133 00:46:23,711 --> 00:46:26,335 - Ready? Go on. - Yeah, some kind of drama there. 1134 00:46:26,369 --> 00:46:28,820 - Yeah. - Sing Goddess Achilles. 1135 00:46:28,855 --> 00:46:30,546 Rage black and murderous 1136 00:46:30,580 --> 00:46:33,066 that cost the Greeks incalculable pain. 1137 00:46:33,100 --> 00:46:34,964 And cast countless souls of heroes 1138 00:46:34,999 --> 00:46:38,588 into Hades' black, dark, pit. 1139 00:46:38,623 --> 00:46:42,351 I am from BAFTA and I'm afraid 1140 00:46:42,385 --> 00:46:45,250 your performance, whilst impressive 1141 00:46:45,285 --> 00:46:47,528 didn't quite meet the criteria. 1142 00:46:48,875 --> 00:46:50,531 ♪ It's a tragedy 1143 00:46:50,566 --> 00:46:54,639 ♪ When a feeling's gone and you can't go on it's tragedy ♪ 1144 00:46:54,673 --> 00:46:56,952 ♪ When the morning cries and you don't know why ♪ 1145 00:46:56,986 --> 00:46:58,746 ♪ It's hard to bear 1146 00:46:58,781 --> 00:47:02,405 ♪ With no one beside you you're going nowhere ♪ 1147 00:47:02,440 --> 00:47:03,751 Can you sort of.. 1148 00:47:03,786 --> 00:47:05,374 Yeah, but it's not a tragedy, is it? 1149 00:47:05,408 --> 00:47:06,651 That's just depression. 1150 00:47:06,685 --> 00:47:08,042 Well, that's what a doctor would say 1151 00:47:08,066 --> 00:47:09,067 but Barry's not a doctor 1152 00:47:09,102 --> 00:47:10,793 Barry's a, a wordsmith. 1153 00:47:10,828 --> 00:47:13,347 So he's... he's employing his poetic license. 1154 00:47:14,728 --> 00:47:15,867 ♪ Tragedy 1155 00:47:15,902 --> 00:47:17,869 Oh, look at this, we're on a look at that. 1156 00:47:17,904 --> 00:47:20,527 - Look at that. Come on, come on, Greece. - Oh, the bloody Greeks. 1157 00:47:20,561 --> 00:47:23,530 Come on, Greece, two and a half thousand years. 1158 00:47:24,945 --> 00:47:27,879 Hi, it's Emma. Hello, hi, yeah. 1159 00:47:27,914 --> 00:47:30,951 Um, I'm just checking that you're there, we're about to pull in. 1160 00:47:30,986 --> 00:47:33,574 Great. Oh, brilliant. Alright then. Fab. 1161 00:47:34,921 --> 00:47:36,854 [indistinct chatter] 1162 00:47:46,691 --> 00:47:48,141 - Oh, hi, Yugov. - Hi, Emma, welcome. 1163 00:47:48,175 --> 00:47:50,108 Nice to meet you, how you doing? 1164 00:47:50,143 --> 00:47:52,362 So you're gonna meet them tomorrow with the car and then back here. 1165 00:47:52,386 --> 00:47:53,905 - Yes, yes. - Yeah. Okay, brilliant. 1166 00:47:53,940 --> 00:47:55,331 - We're going on one of the big yacht? - Thank you. 1167 00:47:55,355 --> 00:47:57,081 Um, where does the ferry go from? 1168 00:47:57,115 --> 00:47:58,990 - The ferry's down there on the right. - Okay, brilliant. 1169 00:47:59,014 --> 00:48:01,292 - Have a good time. - Bye, Yugov. Thank you so much. 1170 00:48:01,326 --> 00:48:02,569 Okay, let's go. 1171 00:48:03,673 --> 00:48:05,468 There's no cars allowed on Piedra. 1172 00:48:05,503 --> 00:48:06,721 - Really? - Gotta get a ferry, yeah. 1173 00:48:06,745 --> 00:48:07,746 That's good. 1174 00:48:07,781 --> 00:48:08,920 Yeah, it is good. 1175 00:48:08,955 --> 00:48:11,440 [instrumental music] 1176 00:48:26,696 --> 00:48:28,871 [bell tolling] 1177 00:48:37,535 --> 00:48:39,123 [laughs] 1178 00:48:39,157 --> 00:48:40,365 - Hi. - Hi. 1179 00:48:40,400 --> 00:48:42,747 - I can take your bags? - Oh, amazing. 1180 00:48:42,781 --> 00:48:44,611 - Ah, we're gonna stay at the Hedria. - Yes. 1181 00:48:44,645 --> 00:48:46,037 - Where is the Hedria? - It's over there. 1182 00:48:46,061 --> 00:48:47,101 - Okay, right. - Very near. 1183 00:48:47,131 --> 00:48:48,787 And you'll take us to reception? 1184 00:48:48,822 --> 00:48:50,099 Okay, brilliant. 1185 00:48:50,134 --> 00:48:52,653 [instrumental music] 1186 00:48:57,210 --> 00:48:59,902 [speaking in foreign language] 1187 00:48:59,937 --> 00:49:03,423 Right here we have the sea mustard gazpacho. 1188 00:49:03,457 --> 00:49:05,114 - Oh. - Wow. Amazing. 1189 00:49:05,149 --> 00:49:06,633 - Wow. - Wow, it's amazing. 1190 00:49:08,048 --> 00:49:09,429 Delicious, thank you. 1191 00:49:09,463 --> 00:49:10,982 [indistinct chatter] 1192 00:49:12,570 --> 00:49:15,124 - How are your kids, Rob? Good. - Good, thank you. 1193 00:49:15,159 --> 00:49:18,714 Um, Chloe is ten, Charlie is four. 1194 00:49:18,748 --> 00:49:20,992 - Wow. - They're a handful. 1195 00:49:21,027 --> 00:49:22,097 [chuckles] 1196 00:49:22,131 --> 00:49:23,546 - Well.. - How's yours? 1197 00:49:23,581 --> 00:49:25,272 Very well, thanks, she's four. 1198 00:49:25,307 --> 00:49:27,861 Would you have another one do you think at your age now? 1199 00:49:27,895 --> 00:49:29,759 I just think at a certain age you probably 1200 00:49:29,794 --> 00:49:32,014 it's probably, uh, not fair on the kids, is it? You know. 1201 00:49:32,038 --> 00:49:33,843 That'll keep you young, though, look at Jagger. 1202 00:49:33,867 --> 00:49:36,121 Have you seen that clip of him after he had his operation? 1203 00:49:36,145 --> 00:49:38,020 - I've seen that, where he's dancing. - Where he's dancing, yeah. 1204 00:49:38,044 --> 00:49:39,538 - It's amazing. - How long, we... well.. 1205 00:49:39,562 --> 00:49:40,815 How long was it after his operation? 1206 00:49:40,839 --> 00:49:42,427 I don't know, not long. Here, look. 1207 00:49:42,462 --> 00:49:43,680 Like pretty soon after. It was incredible. 1208 00:49:43,704 --> 00:49:45,258 Golly, go on, let me have a look. 1209 00:49:45,292 --> 00:49:47,950 But he has many young children, right? So he needs to keep fit. 1210 00:49:47,985 --> 00:49:50,297 He's, pretty soon, he'll be the only man in Britain 1211 00:49:50,332 --> 00:49:52,334 with an earlier bed time than his child. 1212 00:49:52,368 --> 00:49:54,336 [laughing] 1213 00:49:54,370 --> 00:49:56,202 Don't wanna go to bed. I wanna stay up, 1214 00:49:56,227 --> 00:49:57,684 I wanna watch the "One Show." 1215 00:49:57,718 --> 00:49:59,824 You can share their nappies. 1216 00:49:59,858 --> 00:50:01,757 Oh, hang on, he's found it, I hope he has. 1217 00:50:01,791 --> 00:50:04,277 Or either that or he's having some sort of a fit. 1218 00:50:04,311 --> 00:50:05,495 I've... I've, I knocked the screen off. 1219 00:50:05,519 --> 00:50:07,694 Oh, whoops, don't worry. 1220 00:50:07,728 --> 00:50:09,672 - It's impressive though, right? - No, it's, uh, very impressive. 1221 00:50:09,696 --> 00:50:11,732 He's got a three-year-old. He's obviously a.. 1222 00:50:11,767 --> 00:50:14,425 - Yeah. - Imagine him in the hospital. 1223 00:50:14,459 --> 00:50:16,875 "Oh, can I just say, this ward is like 1224 00:50:16,910 --> 00:50:20,845 really noisy and 'cause we can't, keep it down." 1225 00:50:20,879 --> 00:50:23,848 - "What time is visiting hours?" - "When's the magazines coming around? 1226 00:50:23,882 --> 00:50:25,377 - I've finished this one." - Here we are. Here we are. 1227 00:50:25,401 --> 00:50:27,679 "See the bloke in the next bed? 1228 00:50:27,714 --> 00:50:29,992 He's done nothing but complain since he got here." 1229 00:50:30,027 --> 00:50:32,995 "The nurses are... are, they're like, they're like 1230 00:50:33,030 --> 00:50:35,101 "they're like, angel nurses in their.. 1231 00:50:35,135 --> 00:50:38,000 "And he doesn't know who would complain. I'm like, one elbow. 1232 00:50:38,035 --> 00:50:40,209 "You know, you, we should know if you're alive. 1233 00:50:40,244 --> 00:50:43,247 "You know what I mean.. And... and him over there. 1234 00:50:43,281 --> 00:50:46,284 "He has no visitors, really sad. 1235 00:50:46,319 --> 00:50:47,872 "No one comes to see him. 1236 00:50:47,906 --> 00:50:51,013 You alright? Hello!" "Yeah." 1237 00:50:51,048 --> 00:50:53,602 "You... you doing alright?" "Yeah." 1238 00:50:53,636 --> 00:50:55,914 Do you think he was on the ward at Papworth? 1239 00:50:55,949 --> 00:50:57,858 Yeah, no, he probably had a private room, didn't he? 1240 00:50:57,882 --> 00:50:59,366 - Yeah. - Yeah, most likely. 1241 00:50:59,401 --> 00:51:00,930 "Never mind, I can't get no satisfaction 1242 00:51:00,954 --> 00:51:03,163 "I can't get no sleep. The bloody noise. 1243 00:51:03,198 --> 00:51:06,166 "That one over there is moaning and groaning all night. 1244 00:51:06,201 --> 00:51:07,581 You know, oh, oh, oh.." 1245 00:51:07,616 --> 00:51:09,066 "Oh, it's talking to him. So.." 1246 00:51:09,100 --> 00:51:10,722 "No wonder he don't get any visitors. 1247 00:51:10,757 --> 00:51:13,311 - I mean, it's a nightmare." - "Yeah." 1248 00:51:13,346 --> 00:51:15,210 "But, you know, Keith's come to visit 1249 00:51:15,244 --> 00:51:16,659 "and Ronny's come to visit 1250 00:51:16,694 --> 00:51:18,661 you know and Charlie's come to visit." 1251 00:51:18,696 --> 00:51:20,639 - What, what? - Didn't him and Keith have a bit of a falling out? 1252 00:51:20,663 --> 00:51:23,010 - No, no. - It's... it's like me and him. 1253 00:51:23,045 --> 00:51:25,092 - We get on, we love each other. - Yeah, we have a little, uh.. 1254 00:51:25,116 --> 00:51:27,360 "Me and Keith, we sometimes have a bit of a, you know." 1255 00:51:27,394 --> 00:51:28,509 He said he had a tiny toddler, though. 1256 00:51:28,533 --> 00:51:29,752 Isn't there some article about.. 1257 00:51:29,776 --> 00:51:31,950 I, no, no, no. I've seen him.. No. 1258 00:51:31,985 --> 00:51:33,997 - Would you forgive Rob if he said that? - Sometimes. 1259 00:51:34,021 --> 00:51:35,954 Well, people would know if it wasn't true. 1260 00:51:35,989 --> 00:51:39,026 This cat's, this cat's gonna be his.. 1261 00:51:39,061 --> 00:51:42,168 When he goes swimming, right, like when he's facing down 1262 00:51:42,202 --> 00:51:44,756 it's like he's dredging, you know, it's like he's... 1263 00:51:44,791 --> 00:51:46,793 Oh, God. 1264 00:51:46,827 --> 00:51:49,106 That's what Keith Richards, and when he, when he laughs.. 1265 00:51:49,140 --> 00:51:50,624 [wheezes] 1266 00:51:50,659 --> 00:51:53,455 ...it's like the last death throes of Mutley. 1267 00:51:53,489 --> 00:51:54,835 Yeah. 1268 00:51:54,870 --> 00:51:56,630 [gasping] 1269 00:51:56,665 --> 00:51:58,460 [speaking in foreign language] 1270 00:52:01,808 --> 00:52:03,465 He's loving it, isn't he? Look at that. 1271 00:52:03,499 --> 00:52:05,950 - I could do that. - It is actually quite risky. 1272 00:52:05,984 --> 00:52:09,022 Did I tell you about the time I free climbed Helmet Crag? 1273 00:52:09,056 --> 00:52:10,368 Yes, you did. 1274 00:52:10,403 --> 00:52:12,267 - What is he doing? - Ooh. 1275 00:52:12,301 --> 00:52:13,958 - Whoa. Look at that. - Oh, my God. 1276 00:52:13,992 --> 00:52:16,995 You could be nastily thrown against the rocks. 1277 00:52:17,030 --> 00:52:19,205 - I couldn't do that. - So, and here we have... 1278 00:52:19,239 --> 00:52:21,690 - Ah, oh, wow. - Shell fishes. 1279 00:52:21,724 --> 00:52:23,519 - Thank you. - Rice. 1280 00:52:25,521 --> 00:52:27,627 - That looks so good. - Thank you. 1281 00:52:27,661 --> 00:52:29,111 - It looks lovely. - Oh, amazing. 1282 00:52:29,146 --> 00:52:30,946 Now this reminds me of when the tide goes out. 1283 00:52:30,975 --> 00:52:32,573 Are we meant to just slurp this like you would an oyster? 1284 00:52:32,597 --> 00:52:34,230 - I think you do, yeah. - What did you do? 1285 00:52:34,254 --> 00:52:35,852 Well, you sort of do that, you sort of do it like... 1286 00:52:35,876 --> 00:52:37,464 - Yeah, well, I think we do.. - Oh, God. 1287 00:52:37,499 --> 00:52:38,614 Isn't it like just fresh oyster 1288 00:52:38,638 --> 00:52:40,122 that... that's like with that 1289 00:52:40,157 --> 00:52:41,192 smothered in garlic? 1290 00:52:41,227 --> 00:52:42,469 That is amazing. 1291 00:52:42,504 --> 00:52:44,954 - That is gorgeous. - Oh, my God. 1292 00:52:44,989 --> 00:52:46,749 I might go for a dive later, if you... 1293 00:52:46,784 --> 00:52:48,268 - Really? Okay. - Yeah. 1294 00:52:48,303 --> 00:52:49,487 I can't do a backflip like that 1295 00:52:49,511 --> 00:52:51,064 but I can swallow dive. 1296 00:52:51,098 --> 00:52:52,238 What's swallow dive? 1297 00:52:52,272 --> 00:52:54,757 Well, you have to put your arms out like this 1298 00:52:54,792 --> 00:52:56,690 because if you, if you do this 1299 00:52:56,725 --> 00:52:58,623 if you do it from a great height, if you do this 1300 00:52:58,658 --> 00:53:00,325 you just go over onto your back, so you have to 1301 00:53:00,349 --> 00:53:03,214 your center of gravity, your chest, right, doing this 1302 00:53:03,249 --> 00:53:05,320 and then bring your arms in at the last minute. 1303 00:53:05,354 --> 00:53:07,080 - Okay. - Yeah. 1304 00:53:07,114 --> 00:53:10,290 Hey, Chloe. How you doing? You alright? 1305 00:53:10,325 --> 00:53:14,121 - I'm good. - Good, how was school today? 1306 00:53:14,156 --> 00:53:16,227 Hey, Joe, it's dad. 1307 00:53:16,262 --> 00:53:19,126 Oh, hi, dad. I've just been to see grandad. 1308 00:53:19,161 --> 00:53:20,576 Alright, go on. 1309 00:53:20,611 --> 00:53:22,820 He's a bit woozy, um 1310 00:53:22,854 --> 00:53:24,580 they've had to run a few more tests. 1311 00:53:24,615 --> 00:53:26,617 Are you gonna miss mummy when she comes out? 1312 00:53:27,445 --> 00:53:28,964 Yeah. 1313 00:53:28,998 --> 00:53:30,655 I'm gonna go back in to see him tonight. 1314 00:53:30,690 --> 00:53:32,761 Brilliant. That's good. 1315 00:53:32,795 --> 00:53:34,625 Yeah. Mum's gonna drive me. 1316 00:53:34,659 --> 00:53:37,386 Oh, great, that's fantastic. How is she? 1317 00:53:37,421 --> 00:53:40,217 No, she's good, yeah, yeah. She said to say hello. 1318 00:53:40,251 --> 00:53:43,185 Okay, well, uh.. Yeah, say hello back to her so.. 1319 00:53:43,220 --> 00:53:47,672 And I thank you for, obviously, uh, stepping into the fray. 1320 00:53:47,707 --> 00:53:49,881 It'll be fun with granny though, won't it? 1321 00:53:49,916 --> 00:53:54,334 Yeah, good forehead, darling, well done. Hello. 1322 00:53:54,369 --> 00:53:56,854 [instrumental music] 1323 00:54:01,445 --> 00:54:02,756 [water splashes] 1324 00:54:06,208 --> 00:54:08,141 Good luck. 1325 00:54:08,175 --> 00:54:10,143 Oh, Ms. Jones. 1326 00:54:10,177 --> 00:54:13,284 Ms. Jones, you look wonderful tonight, Ms. Jones. 1327 00:54:13,319 --> 00:54:15,252 Thank you, as do you. 1328 00:54:15,286 --> 00:54:19,117 The Himalayas are unmistakable, Ms. Jones. 1329 00:54:19,152 --> 00:54:20,854 Would you... would you... Would you join me, Ms. Jones 1330 00:54:20,878 --> 00:54:22,269 on the terrace for a drink? Would you? 1331 00:54:22,293 --> 00:54:23,960 I'm just wondering here Leonard Cohen's house 1332 00:54:23,984 --> 00:54:25,848 might have been. He had a house on here. 1333 00:54:25,883 --> 00:54:27,367 Do you think he's got a blue plaque 1334 00:54:27,402 --> 00:54:28,644 Leonard Cohen lived here? 1335 00:54:28,679 --> 00:54:29,956 Oh, yes, I would think so. 1336 00:54:29,990 --> 00:54:33,166 I mean, Lennon and McCartney had them. 1337 00:54:33,200 --> 00:54:35,686 [instrumental music] 1338 00:54:37,998 --> 00:54:39,068 Bravo! 1339 00:54:43,038 --> 00:54:46,041 It's not really high enough to do a proper swallow dive. 1340 00:54:46,075 --> 00:54:48,043 No, I think that was perfect. 1341 00:54:48,077 --> 00:54:51,115 Well, actually it's, this is a very difficult dive. 1342 00:54:51,149 --> 00:54:53,807 You... you... you've gotta arch your back, you see 1343 00:54:53,842 --> 00:54:55,637 and, uh, i... if... if you don't get 1344 00:54:55,671 --> 00:54:57,294 the right entry, it's lethal. 1345 00:54:57,328 --> 00:54:59,192 I know. 1346 00:54:59,226 --> 00:55:02,160 You know they're gonna have fireworks later. 1347 00:55:02,195 --> 00:55:05,232 - Ah, how do you know? - Because I've been here before. 1348 00:55:05,267 --> 00:55:07,200 Oh, I thought you were being metaphorical. 1349 00:55:07,234 --> 00:55:09,754 [instrumental music] 1350 00:55:10,790 --> 00:55:12,343 [crackers bursting] 1351 00:55:12,378 --> 00:55:14,311 [crowd cheering] 1352 00:55:37,264 --> 00:55:39,715 [music continues] 1353 00:56:07,329 --> 00:56:09,780 [music continues] 1354 00:56:12,369 --> 00:56:13,991 I have to get the ferry. 1355 00:56:14,025 --> 00:56:15,026 Okay. 1356 00:56:16,062 --> 00:56:17,132 Bye. 1357 00:56:18,271 --> 00:56:19,721 [sighs] 1358 00:56:22,758 --> 00:56:24,415 ♪ Forever and ever 1359 00:56:24,450 --> 00:56:30,421 ♪ Forever and ever you'll be the one ♪ 1360 00:56:30,456 --> 00:56:31,422 Wait, it's a, it's.. 1361 00:56:31,457 --> 00:56:32,734 ♪ Who shines on.. 1362 00:56:32,768 --> 00:56:34,287 It's falsetto, isn't it? 1363 00:56:34,321 --> 00:56:36,427 It gets to falsetto, it doesn't start falsetto. 1364 00:56:36,462 --> 00:56:40,397 It's okay, and it's not, no, it's not forever, it's, it's.. 1365 00:56:40,431 --> 00:56:41,708 ♪ Ever and ever 1366 00:56:41,743 --> 00:56:43,020 Don't start there, Steve. 1367 00:56:43,054 --> 00:56:44,953 As... as... as your proctologist 1368 00:56:44,987 --> 00:56:46,989 I would advise you do not start there. 1369 00:56:47,024 --> 00:56:48,474 Let's see what happens. 1370 00:56:48,508 --> 00:56:50,130 ♪ Ever and ever 1371 00:56:50,165 --> 00:56:54,031 ♪ Forever and ever you'll be the one ♪ 1372 00:56:54,065 --> 00:56:56,620 See, what's happened, half the audience has left. 1373 00:56:56,654 --> 00:56:58,138 ♪ Ever and ever 1374 00:56:58,173 --> 00:57:02,453 ♪ Forever and ever you'll be the one ♪ 1375 00:57:02,488 --> 00:57:03,937 - Hello viewers. - Alright, alright. 1376 00:57:03,972 --> 00:57:05,352 ♪ Ever and ever ♪ 1377 00:57:05,387 --> 00:57:10,012 ♪ Forever and ever you'll be the one ♪ 1378 00:57:10,047 --> 00:57:16,260 ♪ Who shines on me for all eternity ♪ 1379 00:57:16,294 --> 00:57:17,996 To be fair, when Denis did it, he had a very... 1380 00:57:18,020 --> 00:57:19,401 ♪ Ever and ever 1381 00:57:19,436 --> 00:57:23,336 ♪ Forever and ever you'll be the one ♪ 1382 00:57:23,370 --> 00:57:25,649 - Use falsetto. - Are you deliberately doing it badly? 1383 00:57:25,683 --> 00:57:26,822 ♪ Shines on me 1384 00:57:26,857 --> 00:57:27,996 Right, okay, ready? 1385 00:57:28,030 --> 00:57:30,481 ♪ For all etern.. 1386 00:57:30,516 --> 00:57:32,483 - That.. Yeah, go on. - Can I have a go? 1387 00:57:34,036 --> 00:57:35,935 ♪ Ever and ever 1388 00:57:35,969 --> 00:57:40,733 ♪ Forever and ever you'll be the one ♪ 1389 00:57:40,767 --> 00:57:41,917 But you didn't do that, you did falsetto. 1390 00:57:41,941 --> 00:57:43,080 ♪ That sh... 1391 00:57:43,114 --> 00:57:45,013 - You used falsetto. - Did I? 1392 00:57:45,047 --> 00:57:49,086 Talk over you doing it and tell you how to do it? No. 1393 00:57:49,120 --> 00:57:50,546 No, because you don't know how to do, 'cause you 1394 00:57:50,570 --> 00:57:52,203 'cause, well, you obviously don't know how to do it. 1395 00:57:52,227 --> 00:57:54,056 'Cause it's falsetto. You went into falsetto. 1396 00:57:54,091 --> 00:57:55,092 ♪ Ever and ever 1397 00:57:55,126 --> 00:57:56,403 Yes, he went into it 1398 00:57:56,438 --> 00:57:58,198 but I haven't reached that stage yet. 1399 00:57:58,233 --> 00:57:59,900 He didn't start in falsetto, did he, Steve? 1400 00:57:59,924 --> 00:58:02,168 - No, no. - Did I start in falsetto? 1401 00:58:02,202 --> 00:58:03,525 - No. - No, so I was doing the same as Denis. 1402 00:58:03,549 --> 00:58:04,757 When you got to the high notes 1403 00:58:04,791 --> 00:58:06,206 you also remained out of falsetto 1404 00:58:06,241 --> 00:58:08,519 - Car. - Out of falsetto you remained. 1405 00:58:08,554 --> 00:58:10,107 - Here we go. - Even the high notes. 1406 00:58:10,132 --> 00:58:10,935 Right. Here we go, here we go. 1407 00:58:10,970 --> 00:58:13,282 How about you do a sponsored silence now for charity? 1408 00:58:13,317 --> 00:58:15,733 - Okay, go on. - Here we go. 1409 00:58:15,768 --> 00:58:17,563 ♪ Ever and ever 1410 00:58:17,597 --> 00:58:23,810 ♪ Forever and ever you'll be the one ♪ 1411 00:58:23,845 --> 00:58:27,676 ♪ That shines on me 1412 00:58:27,711 --> 00:58:31,508 ♪ Like the morning sun 1413 00:58:31,542 --> 00:58:35,822 ♪ Ever and ever and ever and ever ♪ 1414 00:58:35,857 --> 00:58:39,619 ♪ You'll be be the one 1415 00:58:39,654 --> 00:58:44,590 ♪ Who shines on me like the morning sun ♪ 1416 00:58:44,624 --> 00:58:47,558 - It's not Castrato. - Wait, wait, wait. 1417 00:58:47,593 --> 00:58:51,976 ♪ All my life and now I have been yearning ♪ 1418 00:58:52,011 --> 00:58:53,633 Shall I call, shall I call an ambulance? 1419 00:58:53,668 --> 00:58:54,979 Shall I call an ambulance? 1420 00:58:55,014 --> 00:58:57,637 ♪ Every day with you 1421 00:58:57,672 --> 00:59:02,677 ♪ My heart is churning 1422 00:59:02,711 --> 00:59:04,333 ♪ Forever and ever 1423 00:59:04,368 --> 00:59:06,528 What the hell are you doing? You're all over the place. 1424 00:59:07,647 --> 00:59:10,270 You were shocked by the power of my falsetto. 1425 00:59:14,378 --> 00:59:16,898 [line ringing] 1426 00:59:19,832 --> 00:59:21,592 - Hello. - Hey, hello. 1427 00:59:21,627 --> 00:59:23,432 - Are you alright? - Yeah, very good, thank you. 1428 00:59:23,456 --> 00:59:25,354 - Is everything sorted? - It is. 1429 00:59:25,389 --> 00:59:27,840 Emma's organized it all. She says it'll be fine. 1430 00:59:29,082 --> 00:59:31,360 - Hello? - Hey, Katherine. 1431 00:59:31,395 --> 00:59:35,295 Ah, it's, uh, um, uh, it's Steve. Um, how are you? 1432 00:59:35,330 --> 00:59:37,470 Yeah, I'm fine, thank you. What can I do for you? 1433 00:59:37,504 --> 00:59:39,824 Yeah, I'm trying to get Joe, he's not answering his mobile. 1434 00:59:39,852 --> 00:59:42,613 - Is... is he there? - Ah, yep, yep. 1435 00:59:42,648 --> 00:59:43,866 - I'll just get him for you. - Oh, good. 1436 00:59:43,890 --> 00:59:45,616 Oh. 1437 00:59:45,651 --> 00:59:48,446 I'm sorry about your dad by the way. 1438 00:59:48,481 --> 00:59:50,241 Oh, thank you. Yeah, yeah. 1439 00:59:50,276 --> 00:59:52,105 Joe's here. Have a chat with him. 1440 00:59:52,140 --> 00:59:53,313 Take care, okay, bye. 1441 00:59:53,348 --> 00:59:55,212 - Thanks, love. - Thanks. 1442 00:59:55,246 --> 00:59:58,249 - Hey, dad. - Hey, how you doing? 1443 00:59:58,284 --> 01:00:00,389 Yeah, I'm alright, thanks. How are you? 1444 01:00:00,424 --> 01:00:03,047 Great, great. Listen, how's grandad? 1445 01:00:03,082 --> 01:00:04,566 Oh, he's okay. 1446 01:00:04,601 --> 01:00:06,223 You know, I mean, same as yesterday. 1447 01:00:06,257 --> 01:00:08,052 He seems, he seems stable. 1448 01:00:08,087 --> 01:00:10,572 [speaking in foreign language] 1449 01:00:16,889 --> 01:00:18,349 What's amazing about the Mani is that 1450 01:00:18,373 --> 01:00:19,695 thousands of years ago when it was ruled by 1451 01:00:19,719 --> 01:00:22,619 when Sparta was the most powerful nation state 1452 01:00:22,653 --> 01:00:24,206 in Ancient Greece 1453 01:00:24,241 --> 01:00:27,831 to be part of the ruling council you had to be over 60 years old. 1454 01:00:27,865 --> 01:00:29,899 - Yes. Yes, yes. - So, I would be too young... 1455 01:00:29,924 --> 01:00:31,120 ...to be part of the government. 1456 01:00:31,144 --> 01:00:33,940 I'd be like some, I'd be like some young, rapscallion 1457 01:00:33,975 --> 01:00:35,677 the... the ruling council will be there in their robes 1458 01:00:35,701 --> 01:00:38,117 the elders, very wise, and I'd be hanging around 1459 01:00:38,151 --> 01:00:39,981 and they'd be going, "Get outta here, Steve 1460 01:00:40,015 --> 01:00:41,672 you silly young thing." 1461 01:00:41,707 --> 01:00:44,606 - Would you ever run for public office? - No, no. 1462 01:00:44,641 --> 01:00:46,435 Because you'd be a great orator, wouldn't you 1463 01:00:46,470 --> 01:00:48,886 with your, with your, with your skills of speaking. 1464 01:00:48,921 --> 01:00:50,060 I don't.. 1465 01:00:50,094 --> 01:00:52,303 [mumbles] 1466 01:00:52,338 --> 01:00:54,488 Are you worried they'd... they'd be digging through your past? 1467 01:00:54,512 --> 01:00:56,490 No, I don't, I'm not bothered, I'm not worried about that. 1468 01:00:56,514 --> 01:00:58,413 Because that's a pro, that's a pro nowadays. 1469 01:00:58,447 --> 01:01:01,381 I mean, look at, look at some of these people. 1470 01:01:01,416 --> 01:01:02,911 Look at your Trumps and your Johnsons. 1471 01:01:02,935 --> 01:01:04,522 - Yeah. - They've all done stuff. 1472 01:01:04,557 --> 01:01:06,224 - Yeah, well, you know, I mean.. - Not at your level but... 1473 01:01:06,248 --> 01:01:07,284 The one's, if you think 1474 01:01:07,318 --> 01:01:09,735 if you think about Heracles 1475 01:01:09,769 --> 01:01:10,977 he was someone who... 1476 01:01:11,012 --> 01:01:12,807 Heracles? Don't you mean Hercules? 1477 01:01:12,841 --> 01:01:14,394 Ah, if you're, if you're using 1478 01:01:14,429 --> 01:01:15,855 the Roman name, then yes, it would be Hercules. 1479 01:01:15,879 --> 01:01:17,439 - I only know him from the film. - Okay. 1480 01:01:17,466 --> 01:01:21,194 Well, Heracles is the Greek name for him 1481 01:01:21,229 --> 01:01:23,127 he murdered his wife and children... 1482 01:01:23,162 --> 01:01:25,612 Arnold Schwarzenegger played him, in the movie. 1483 01:01:25,647 --> 01:01:28,098 Okay, the labors of Hercules, if you like. 1484 01:01:28,132 --> 01:01:30,721 - "Hercules In New York." - Was, if you... 1485 01:01:30,756 --> 01:01:32,861 - One of my first movies. - Thank you. 1486 01:01:32,896 --> 01:01:35,036 From a Christian perspective 1487 01:01:35,070 --> 01:01:37,072 is basically, him serving his penance. 1488 01:01:37,107 --> 01:01:39,696 Can't even imagine Christianity forgiving a man 1489 01:01:39,730 --> 01:01:41,259 for murdering his wife and children, you've got... 1490 01:01:41,283 --> 01:01:42,940 Quite right, too. 1491 01:01:42,975 --> 01:01:44,493 Mr. Coogan, are you suggesting that 1492 01:01:44,528 --> 01:01:46,979 that the man standing before us today 1493 01:01:47,013 --> 01:01:48,335 who murdered his wife and children 1494 01:01:48,359 --> 01:01:49,844 should be, should be forgiven? 1495 01:01:49,878 --> 01:01:53,986 Hercules, Arnold played him in, "Hercules In New York." 1496 01:01:54,020 --> 01:01:56,920 - "Hercules In New York." - It was one of my first films. 1497 01:01:56,954 --> 01:02:00,647 "One of my first." You sound a bit like, uh, Werner Herzog there. 1498 01:02:00,682 --> 01:02:02,556 That's right. That's who I was doing. I was doing Werner. 1499 01:02:02,580 --> 01:02:07,378 It was one of my first films. It very hard to do. 1500 01:02:07,413 --> 01:02:09,622 I had to get Arnold Schwarzenegger 1501 01:02:09,656 --> 01:02:10,830 to do it for me. 1502 01:02:10,865 --> 01:02:15,697 My name is Georgia, everybody calls me George. 1503 01:02:15,732 --> 01:02:17,181 [scatting] 1504 01:02:18,631 --> 01:02:20,978 - Anyway, um... - Remember that? 1505 01:02:21,013 --> 01:02:22,221 - Sir. - Oh. 1506 01:02:22,255 --> 01:02:24,775 We are going to start with one salad. 1507 01:02:24,810 --> 01:02:26,190 - Good idea. - Thank you. 1508 01:02:26,225 --> 01:02:27,260 - Thank you. - Oh, this.. 1509 01:02:27,295 --> 01:02:28,641 Yeah, perfect. 1510 01:02:28,675 --> 01:02:30,919 Make some space and put it into the middle. 1511 01:02:30,954 --> 01:02:33,128 - Mm-hmm. - Thank you. 1512 01:02:33,163 --> 01:02:34,509 One melitzana dip. 1513 01:02:34,543 --> 01:02:36,038 And just one moment for the bread please. 1514 01:02:36,062 --> 01:02:37,236 - Okay. - Thank you. 1515 01:02:37,270 --> 01:02:39,100 - Already enjoy. - Thank you. 1516 01:02:39,134 --> 01:02:40,422 - She's charming. - Did you hear that? 1517 01:02:40,446 --> 01:02:41,906 - Charming little thing. - Already enjoy. 1518 01:02:41,930 --> 01:02:44,105 - What a lovely slogan. - It is a lovely, yes, it is. 1519 01:02:44,139 --> 01:02:46,935 I'd like to have that on a T-shirt. 1520 01:02:46,970 --> 01:02:48,454 - Already enjoy. - Yeah. 1521 01:02:48,488 --> 01:02:50,767 Well, you're a bit old for T-shirts with slogans on 1522 01:02:50,801 --> 01:02:52,078 if you don't mind me saying. 1523 01:02:52,113 --> 01:02:53,942 - Sir. Some bread. - Thank you very much. 1524 01:02:53,977 --> 01:02:55,989 My friend was just saying, what a lovely thing to say 1525 01:02:56,013 --> 01:02:57,463 "Already enjoy." 1526 01:02:57,497 --> 01:02:59,741 Now you can enjoy completely. 1527 01:02:59,776 --> 01:03:01,053 Imagine it on a T-shirt. 1528 01:03:01,087 --> 01:03:02,779 - Yes. It would be nice. - Yes? 1529 01:03:02,813 --> 01:03:05,540 He's too old to have T-shirts with logos on. 1530 01:03:05,574 --> 01:03:07,473 You're never too old for this. 1531 01:03:07,507 --> 01:03:09,716 No, I think, yeah. That's a nice thing to say. 1532 01:03:09,751 --> 01:03:12,650 Just to be clear, "No, you're never too old." 1533 01:03:12,685 --> 01:03:14,307 - I know. - Thank you very much. 1534 01:03:14,342 --> 01:03:16,585 Thank you very much. Already enjoying, thank you. 1535 01:03:16,620 --> 01:03:17,362 Yeah. 1536 01:03:17,387 --> 01:03:19,588 She was very, she was unequivocal there, not too old. 1537 01:03:19,623 --> 01:03:21,843 She, well, what's she gonna say? Yeah you're right, he's past it. 1538 01:03:21,867 --> 01:03:23,730 Well, she could have agreed with you, if you're 1539 01:03:23,765 --> 01:03:25,260 if you're as persuasive as you think you are. 1540 01:03:25,284 --> 01:03:27,320 She was being politically adept 1541 01:03:27,355 --> 01:03:28,815 and that's the best thing to say about it. 1542 01:03:28,839 --> 01:03:30,368 Just to be clear, are you saying that you could 1543 01:03:30,392 --> 01:03:32,463 wear a T-shirt with a slogan on it? 1544 01:03:32,498 --> 01:03:34,614 - Um, I think, I thi.. - You think your four months... 1545 01:03:34,638 --> 01:03:36,882 It's nothing to do, it's nothing to do with age 1546 01:03:36,916 --> 01:03:40,540 it's to do with how you look, and that's the brutal truth is 1547 01:03:40,575 --> 01:03:43,371 yes, I think I am more likely to get away 1548 01:03:43,405 --> 01:03:45,511 with a T-shirt with a logo on it than you are. 1549 01:03:45,545 --> 01:03:47,858 Not by much but just more likely. 1550 01:03:47,893 --> 01:03:49,204 Yeah. 1551 01:03:50,171 --> 01:03:52,380 Anyway, already enjoy. 1552 01:03:53,864 --> 01:03:54,865 - Yeah? - Mm-hmm. 1553 01:03:54,900 --> 01:03:57,454 [speaking in foreign language] 1554 01:04:00,560 --> 01:04:02,321 You know, the, the Ancient Greeks recognized 1555 01:04:02,355 --> 01:04:04,564 that people were a combination of good and bad. 1556 01:04:04,599 --> 01:04:07,291 There's not this, this social media idea 1557 01:04:07,326 --> 01:04:08,914 of demonizing people completely. 1558 01:04:08,948 --> 01:04:13,504 They're either persona non grata or they're heroic is nonsense. 1559 01:04:13,539 --> 01:04:16,507 Their Gods, you know, were complex people 1560 01:04:16,542 --> 01:04:19,096 and, um, it's interesting because this 1561 01:04:19,131 --> 01:04:23,894 this is a good example of it, this review of Stan and Ollie.. 1562 01:04:23,929 --> 01:04:27,208 Wait. Review of Stan and Ollie? Is a good example of what? 1563 01:04:27,242 --> 01:04:30,142 - Ah, of.. - You're tying this into Greek mythology? 1564 01:04:30,176 --> 01:04:31,522 Yes. 1565 01:04:31,557 --> 01:04:33,041 Um, the review of Stan and Ollie 1566 01:04:33,076 --> 01:04:34,284 in the Spectator says 1567 01:04:34,318 --> 01:04:35,802 "It's a good job Steve Coogan 1568 01:04:35,837 --> 01:04:37,459 "is a brilliant actor. 1569 01:04:37,494 --> 01:04:39,634 "He conveys Stan's likeability so well 1570 01:04:39,668 --> 01:04:41,532 "that for 97 minutes you forget 1571 01:04:41,567 --> 01:04:44,604 what a self-regarding arse Coogan himself is in real life." 1572 01:04:44,639 --> 01:04:50,783 Now, my takeaway from that is he thinks I'm a brilliant actor. 1573 01:04:50,817 --> 01:04:52,140 - That's what you take away from it? - Yeah. 1574 01:04:52,164 --> 01:04:54,062 - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah. 1575 01:04:54,097 --> 01:04:56,582 [speaking in foreign language] 1576 01:05:03,969 --> 01:05:05,936 That was a lovely, it was just, eh.. 1577 01:05:05,971 --> 01:05:07,938 - It wasn't too much. - Did you like it? 1578 01:05:07,973 --> 01:05:09,733 - We loved it. - Wonderful, yeah, lovely. 1579 01:05:09,767 --> 01:05:11,355 - Really, just fresh. - Thank you. 1580 01:05:11,390 --> 01:05:13,288 - Thank you very much. - Thank you very much. 1581 01:05:13,323 --> 01:05:15,981 - Do you want to continue? - I think so. 1582 01:05:16,015 --> 01:05:17,327 - Yeah? - I think so, yeah. 1583 01:05:17,361 --> 01:05:19,950 Is there, is there an option not to? 1584 01:05:19,985 --> 01:05:21,203 - No, we'll continue, yeah. - It's your choice. 1585 01:05:21,227 --> 01:05:23,195 No, we'll continue, yeah, yeah. 1586 01:05:23,229 --> 01:05:25,197 Never been asked that before. 1587 01:05:25,231 --> 01:05:26,450 Yeah, well, it's a good question. 1588 01:05:26,474 --> 01:05:28,372 - Yeah. - At our age. 1589 01:05:28,407 --> 01:05:30,650 Thank you. 1590 01:05:30,685 --> 01:05:32,687 That's a German accent, isn't it? She's got. 1591 01:05:32,721 --> 01:05:34,137 Think she's German? She's not Greek. 1592 01:05:34,171 --> 01:05:35,621 "Do you want to continue?" 1593 01:05:35,655 --> 01:05:38,520 She could have been asking us about our lives. 1594 01:05:38,555 --> 01:05:40,039 "Do you want to continue?" 1595 01:05:40,074 --> 01:05:41,799 What, she's seen our age and gone 1596 01:05:41,834 --> 01:05:44,009 "Do you want to continue or would you prefer 1597 01:05:44,043 --> 01:05:46,356 I administer the drug now?" 1598 01:05:46,390 --> 01:05:48,220 Well, don't, she.. Not all Germans are Nazis. 1599 01:05:48,254 --> 01:05:49,566 I'm not saying she's a Nazi. 1600 01:05:49,600 --> 01:05:51,292 I'm saying she's in some lovely clinic 1601 01:05:51,326 --> 01:05:52,845 where we go in Switzerland. 1602 01:05:52,879 --> 01:05:55,917 Yeah, I know what you were driving at, are you? Okay. 1603 01:05:55,952 --> 01:05:58,437 I'm not saying she's the occupying force 1604 01:05:58,471 --> 01:06:00,715 I'm saying she's in a clinic and she's saying 1605 01:06:00,749 --> 01:06:02,993 "Do you want to continue? Or would you like..." 1606 01:06:03,028 --> 01:06:04,408 Don't mention the war. 1607 01:06:04,443 --> 01:06:05,927 [laughing] 1608 01:06:05,962 --> 01:06:07,998 - I'm not, but seriously. - Yeah, she's lov.. 1609 01:06:08,033 --> 01:06:10,276 I like, I like a foreign accent on a, on a woman. 1610 01:06:10,311 --> 01:06:12,692 - You like women. - Mr. Bond. 1611 01:06:12,727 --> 01:06:15,178 You know, it's like you, "Oh, where's she from?" 1612 01:06:15,212 --> 01:06:16,420 Oh, one of Th.. 1613 01:06:16,455 --> 01:06:18,664 So, we continue with risotto. 1614 01:06:18,698 --> 01:06:19,872 - Thank you. - One for you. 1615 01:06:19,906 --> 01:06:22,185 - Oh, look at that. - Oh, wow, wow. 1616 01:06:22,219 --> 01:06:23,669 Nice and soft for Steve. Thank you. 1617 01:06:23,703 --> 01:06:25,291 - And one for you. - There we are. 1618 01:06:25,326 --> 01:06:26,499 Enjoy it. 1619 01:06:27,466 --> 01:06:28,985 [speaking in foreign language] 1620 01:06:34,507 --> 01:06:37,441 Oh, boy. Look at that, Rob. 1621 01:06:39,616 --> 01:06:41,307 Three sirens? 1622 01:06:41,342 --> 01:06:42,688 Yeah? On the rocks. 1623 01:06:42,722 --> 01:06:45,484 Yeah, yeah. Ugh. Luring me. 1624 01:06:45,518 --> 01:06:47,210 Well, Odysseus strapped himself to the mast 1625 01:06:47,244 --> 01:06:49,867 so he wouldn't be tempted by that sort of a hussy. 1626 01:06:49,902 --> 01:06:51,638 - Mm, yeah. - That's what you need, isn't it? 1627 01:06:51,662 --> 01:06:53,285 You've needed that in your life, I think. 1628 01:06:53,319 --> 01:06:55,218 Someone to strap you to the mast 1629 01:06:55,252 --> 01:06:57,151 to stop you doing mischief. 1630 01:06:57,185 --> 01:06:59,015 The other sailors put bungs in their ears 1631 01:06:59,049 --> 01:07:01,465 so they wouldn't hear the sirens' song. 1632 01:07:01,500 --> 01:07:03,743 He wants to hear it, but he didn't want to be lured. 1633 01:07:03,778 --> 01:07:06,298 So, he wants to check, check out the sirens... 1634 01:07:06,332 --> 01:07:08,172 Couldn't be more like you. Couldn't be more like you. 1635 01:07:08,196 --> 01:07:11,199 You want, you want to experience it up to a point. 1636 01:07:11,234 --> 01:07:13,926 But halfway through, he begs them to untie him 1637 01:07:13,960 --> 01:07:17,343 so that he could go and consummate or, uh, you know.. 1638 01:07:17,378 --> 01:07:19,000 If I had strapped you to the mast 1639 01:07:19,035 --> 01:07:21,451 I would stick with the agreement. I wouldn't untie you. 1640 01:07:21,485 --> 01:07:23,073 And I'd take some pleasure in it. 1641 01:07:23,108 --> 01:07:25,938 I'd have a little, I'd have cotton things in my ears, right? 1642 01:07:25,972 --> 01:07:27,560 You'd be on the mast and you'd go 1643 01:07:27,595 --> 01:07:30,149 "Oh, Rob, Rob, Rob, I... I regret my decision 1644 01:07:30,184 --> 01:07:31,702 please untie me, the Sirens..." 1645 01:07:31,737 --> 01:07:33,704 I wouldn't, why would it be in a Mancunian accent? 1646 01:07:33,739 --> 01:07:35,223 - Hm? - Why would I be.. 1647 01:07:35,258 --> 01:07:36,994 - If I was playing Odysseus.. - You're not playing. 1648 01:07:37,018 --> 01:07:38,513 No, I'm not saying you're playing Odysseus 1649 01:07:38,537 --> 01:07:40,263 I'm saying you are you, and I am me. 1650 01:07:40,297 --> 01:07:43,335 - I'd be going, "Let me go!" - And I'd say, "I'm sorry." 1651 01:07:43,369 --> 01:07:46,821 Let me swim to the Sirens. I demand it! 1652 01:07:46,855 --> 01:07:48,661 You'd have your hands would be by your side, wouldn't you? 1653 01:07:48,685 --> 01:07:51,791 You'd be stuck there, wouldn't you? Yeah. Okay. 1654 01:07:51,826 --> 01:07:53,724 Let me swim to the Sirens. 1655 01:07:53,759 --> 01:07:55,864 I'm sorry, Steve, um, I've got... 1656 01:07:55,899 --> 01:07:57,452 I demand it! 1657 01:07:57,487 --> 01:07:59,213 Steve, do you recognize this? 1658 01:07:59,247 --> 01:08:02,112 My name is Odysseus. Not Steve. 1659 01:08:02,147 --> 01:08:03,941 Who is this Steve you speak of? 1660 01:08:03,976 --> 01:08:06,082 He's a conceited arse that I know from Manchester. 1661 01:08:06,116 --> 01:08:09,499 Well, I know not of him, but I have heard of his talent. 1662 01:08:09,533 --> 01:08:12,053 I believe he's won seven BAFTAs. 1663 01:08:12,088 --> 01:08:13,606 - Seven BAFTAs? - Yes. 1664 01:08:13,641 --> 01:08:16,126 What is a BAFTA that you speak of? 1665 01:08:16,161 --> 01:08:17,783 [speaking in foreign language] 1666 01:08:21,200 --> 01:08:22,650 Service. 1667 01:08:24,341 --> 01:08:27,068 Spartan women had a reputation 1668 01:08:27,103 --> 01:08:29,346 for being the most beautiful women in the world. 1669 01:08:29,381 --> 01:08:31,590 Yet, the men were gay. Go figure. 1670 01:08:31,624 --> 01:08:33,247 - Hello. - Hi. 1671 01:08:33,281 --> 01:08:35,387 So I have some fish for you. 1672 01:08:36,560 --> 01:08:37,630 Thank you. 1673 01:08:37,665 --> 01:08:39,391 And one for you. It's Grouper. 1674 01:08:39,425 --> 01:08:41,462 Thank you. 1675 01:08:41,496 --> 01:08:43,153 - Enjoy it. - Thank you very much. 1676 01:08:43,188 --> 01:08:44,672 Thank you. 1677 01:08:46,501 --> 01:08:47,502 [sighs] 1678 01:08:47,537 --> 01:08:49,642 That's lovely, that's lovely. 1679 01:08:49,677 --> 01:08:51,275 Make sure you mop up a lot of that sauce. 1680 01:08:51,299 --> 01:08:54,992 - Oh, yes. - After lunch, we'll go and see the caves. 1681 01:08:55,027 --> 01:08:57,271 - Why? - It's the Observer's idea. 1682 01:08:57,305 --> 01:09:00,170 The Greeks, as I'm sure you know 1683 01:09:00,205 --> 01:09:01,827 believed that in this area 1684 01:09:01,861 --> 01:09:04,519 caves were entrances to the underworld 1685 01:09:04,554 --> 01:09:06,107 and I thought we could tie that in 1686 01:09:06,142 --> 01:09:10,663 and also I could mention you as Hades.. 1687 01:09:10,698 --> 01:09:13,459 ...flog a few, um, Percy Jackson DVDs. 1688 01:09:14,771 --> 01:09:16,704 - Is everything fine? - Mm, wonderful. 1689 01:09:16,738 --> 01:09:17,946 - Lovely, yeah. - Yeah. 1690 01:09:17,981 --> 01:09:19,914 Gorgeous. 1691 01:09:19,948 --> 01:09:21,916 - Beautiful bay. - It's very nice. 1692 01:09:21,950 --> 01:09:24,505 We have tomorrow a swim race. 1693 01:09:24,539 --> 01:09:26,092 It's called Ocean Man. 1694 01:09:26,127 --> 01:09:29,337 They start from the pier, right there. 1695 01:09:29,372 --> 01:09:30,856 - Can you see it? - Yeah. 1696 01:09:30,890 --> 01:09:33,859 They will start there and swim into this direction 1697 01:09:33,893 --> 01:09:37,069 to new Itilo, to the beach Sepa. 1698 01:09:37,103 --> 01:09:38,898 - Alright. - It's international. 1699 01:09:38,933 --> 01:09:41,211 - People all around the world are coming here. - Wow. 1700 01:09:41,246 --> 01:09:42,695 Maybe you will see it. 1701 01:09:42,730 --> 01:09:44,225 I would love to, I would love to stay for that. 1702 01:09:44,249 --> 01:09:45,560 That sounds amazing. But, uh... 1703 01:09:45,595 --> 01:09:46,915 We cannot stay, we have to leave. 1704 01:09:46,941 --> 01:09:48,667 But, uh, it sounds lovely. 1705 01:09:48,701 --> 01:09:50,324 I'd like to join the race, I'd like to 1706 01:09:50,358 --> 01:09:52,153 I'd like to join in, I think. 1707 01:09:52,188 --> 01:09:53,189 Maybe you can do. 1708 01:09:53,223 --> 01:09:54,845 Yeah, I think so. 1709 01:09:54,880 --> 01:09:56,778 - No? - I don't so. 1710 01:09:56,813 --> 01:09:58,884 - Maybe. - He's joking with you. 1711 01:09:58,918 --> 01:10:00,310 - He's joking with you. - I'm not, I'm not joke.. 1712 01:10:00,334 --> 01:10:02,991 I... I'm, I'm in pretty good shape for my age. 1713 01:10:03,026 --> 01:10:06,478 - We will see. - We will see. We will see. 1714 01:10:06,512 --> 01:10:07,858 Thank you. 1715 01:10:08,963 --> 01:10:10,827 Pity. I'd like to do that. 1716 01:10:10,861 --> 01:10:13,416 I'd like to join in the race, join in the.. 1717 01:10:13,450 --> 01:10:15,003 Not competitively, just, but, uh.. 1718 01:10:15,038 --> 01:10:16,695 That's a long way, look at it. 1719 01:10:16,729 --> 01:10:18,110 I have got very good stamina. 1720 01:10:18,144 --> 01:10:20,837 Neither you, nor I could do that. 1721 01:10:20,871 --> 01:10:23,253 I could certainly, I could beat you in a race, I reckon. 1722 01:10:25,704 --> 01:10:27,464 Well, I don't think you could 1723 01:10:27,499 --> 01:10:30,433 and we don't have time, so [indistinct]. 1724 01:10:30,467 --> 01:10:31,951 Oh, that's convenient. 1725 01:10:33,229 --> 01:10:35,300 Okay, go to the caves and then we have a race. 1726 01:10:35,334 --> 01:10:36,577 Great. Brilliant. 1727 01:10:36,611 --> 01:10:38,199 - You sure? - Yeah. 1728 01:10:38,234 --> 01:10:40,097 [scatting] 1729 01:10:54,664 --> 01:10:57,805 The Swingle Singers live at Chedder Gorge. 1730 01:10:57,839 --> 01:11:01,947 This is more really suited to sort of Gregorian chant 1731 01:11:01,981 --> 01:11:04,329 it being like a sort of Cathedral of sound. 1732 01:11:04,363 --> 01:11:06,020 - I love Greg. - Ahh.. 1733 01:11:06,054 --> 01:11:07,435 - Wait, what? - I love Greg. 1734 01:11:07,470 --> 01:11:08,712 - Greg who? - Gregorian. 1735 01:11:08,747 --> 01:11:11,094 Oh, Gregorian chant, yeah. Very good. 1736 01:11:11,128 --> 01:11:13,269 Well, I don't mind whether Greg or Ian chant. 1737 01:11:13,303 --> 01:11:15,478 I mean they're both good. 1738 01:11:15,512 --> 01:11:18,239 Would you rather, Ian? Ian, you sit this one out. 1739 01:11:18,274 --> 01:11:19,758 Greg's gonna do it. 1740 01:11:20,621 --> 01:11:22,588 [vocalizing] 1741 01:11:35,946 --> 01:11:38,328 [instrumental music] 1742 01:11:38,363 --> 01:11:40,330 You girls, w... why don't you shout 1743 01:11:40,365 --> 01:11:41,504 why don't you say, "Go?" 1744 01:11:41,538 --> 01:11:43,299 Yeah, say, "Three, two, one, go." 1745 01:11:44,265 --> 01:11:45,301 Yeah, sure. 1746 01:11:45,335 --> 01:11:47,303 Alright, don't... don't push me. 1747 01:11:47,337 --> 01:11:49,891 Ready? Steady? Go! 1748 01:11:56,588 --> 01:11:58,728 [indistinct chatter] 1749 01:12:06,287 --> 01:12:08,738 [instrumental music] 1750 01:12:36,352 --> 01:12:38,802 [music continues] 1751 01:12:47,604 --> 01:12:49,641 Alright, okay, you win. 1752 01:12:49,675 --> 01:12:50,849 I've.. It's my shoulder. 1753 01:12:50,883 --> 01:12:52,368 Come on, yes! 1754 01:12:53,334 --> 01:12:54,749 Yes! 1755 01:13:13,250 --> 01:13:15,356 Yes, wh.. Yes. 1756 01:13:17,669 --> 01:13:19,153 Journey. 1757 01:13:24,779 --> 01:13:27,299 [dramatic music] 1758 01:13:27,333 --> 01:13:29,128 [crows cawing] 1759 01:13:40,761 --> 01:13:42,245 Dad? 1760 01:13:45,490 --> 01:13:46,767 Dad! 1761 01:13:52,807 --> 01:13:54,084 Journey. 1762 01:13:54,947 --> 01:13:57,363 [music continues] 1763 01:13:58,468 --> 01:14:00,401 I knew your devotion would prevail 1764 01:14:00,436 --> 01:14:02,230 over all the rigor of the journey 1765 01:14:02,265 --> 01:14:04,025 and bring you to your father. 1766 01:14:05,579 --> 01:14:08,961 Am I to be allowed to look upon your face, my son? 1767 01:14:10,066 --> 01:14:11,964 To hear the voice I know so well 1768 01:14:11,999 --> 01:14:13,932 and answer it with my own. 1769 01:14:15,174 --> 01:14:18,039 I know how many lands you've travelled 1770 01:14:18,074 --> 01:14:21,249 and how many seas you've sailed to get to me here. 1771 01:14:22,492 --> 01:14:24,321 Give me your hand. 1772 01:14:37,162 --> 01:14:38,404 [sighs] 1773 01:14:38,439 --> 01:14:40,061 [birds chirping] 1774 01:14:46,689 --> 01:14:48,035 Steve. 1775 01:14:49,726 --> 01:14:51,521 What are you doing? 1776 01:14:51,556 --> 01:14:52,729 Having a swim. 1777 01:14:52,764 --> 01:14:54,317 We're supposed to go. 1778 01:14:54,351 --> 01:14:55,560 What? 1779 01:14:55,594 --> 01:14:57,182 We're supposed to go. 1780 01:14:59,287 --> 01:15:02,498 Gonna be going near Olympia. Why don't we stop there? 1781 01:15:02,532 --> 01:15:03,947 It's gonna be full of tourists, 1782 01:15:03,982 --> 01:15:07,054 American tourists piling out of coaches. 1783 01:15:07,088 --> 01:15:10,920 The Olympic Games were held every four years 1784 01:15:10,954 --> 01:15:12,680 throughout Classical Antiquity. 1785 01:15:12,715 --> 01:15:16,512 The site is a major tourist attraction 1786 01:15:16,546 --> 01:15:17,892 and has two museums 1787 01:15:17,927 --> 01:15:21,724 one devoted to the ancient and modern games. 1788 01:15:21,758 --> 01:15:22,759 We're not going there. 1789 01:15:22,794 --> 01:15:25,417 We're going to Hellos 1790 01:15:25,451 --> 01:15:27,005 uh, home of King Nester. 1791 01:15:29,455 --> 01:15:31,285 [scatting] 1792 01:15:47,715 --> 01:15:49,303 Vangelis, Greek. 1793 01:15:49,337 --> 01:15:51,305 [scatting] 1794 01:15:51,339 --> 01:15:52,962 You're doing it like a horn though. 1795 01:15:52,996 --> 01:15:55,136 It was a piano. 1796 01:15:55,171 --> 01:15:57,553 [imitating a piano] 1797 01:15:57,587 --> 01:15:59,175 Oh, sorry, glang is the word for piano? 1798 01:15:59,209 --> 01:16:01,177 [imitating a piano] 1799 01:16:06,147 --> 01:16:07,942 I'll be the percussion. 1800 01:16:08,564 --> 01:16:09,599 [scatting] 1801 01:16:23,302 --> 01:16:24,269 Yeah. 1802 01:16:24,303 --> 01:16:26,374 Yeah, hate that. Hate that film. 1803 01:16:26,409 --> 01:16:30,724 Some posh students from Oxford learned to run really quickly. 1804 01:16:30,758 --> 01:16:32,139 The end. 1805 01:16:33,347 --> 01:16:35,049 I think there's a psychological disadvantage 1806 01:16:35,073 --> 01:16:38,041 to sitting in the passenger seat in a car. 1807 01:16:38,076 --> 01:16:42,252 The driver automatically assumes higher status. 1808 01:16:42,287 --> 01:16:44,841 I remember, as a child there was a chap 1809 01:16:44,876 --> 01:16:47,430 whose wife drove and he didn't 1810 01:16:47,464 --> 01:16:49,915 and I remember thinking "Oh, that poor guy." 1811 01:16:49,950 --> 01:16:52,780 And that's to me, I thought it was completely emasculating 1812 01:16:52,815 --> 01:16:56,508 and, um, that woman divorced that man that couldn't drive 1813 01:16:56,542 --> 01:16:59,338 and in my head, even though I was a child, I always thought 1814 01:16:59,373 --> 01:17:01,755 "If he'd learned to drive, he might still be married." 1815 01:17:01,789 --> 01:17:05,172 Yeah, the... the relationship I was in before Sally 1816 01:17:05,206 --> 01:17:09,521 was a long one, and... and when it ended, I was very bereft 1817 01:17:09,555 --> 01:17:11,488 and I went and stayed with my parents 1818 01:17:11,523 --> 01:17:13,466 and they said, "Well, let's go for a ride in the car." 1819 01:17:13,490 --> 01:17:16,942 - Oh, yeah, yeah. - And they drove down to West Wales. 1820 01:17:16,977 --> 01:17:19,117 - But I was sitting in the back. - Oh, dear. 1821 01:17:19,151 --> 01:17:21,637 And not only was I now without my relationship 1822 01:17:21,671 --> 01:17:23,407 I was also a little boy in the back of the car. 1823 01:17:23,431 --> 01:17:25,330 And at one point, near Carmarthen 1824 01:17:25,364 --> 01:17:27,297 I had to say, "Stop, pull over." 1825 01:17:27,332 --> 01:17:28,920 And I made my mum get in the back. 1826 01:17:30,128 --> 01:17:33,131 Look at that breathtaking view. 1827 01:17:33,165 --> 01:17:35,961 Coastal Pilos presides over the Southern end 1828 01:17:35,996 --> 01:17:37,998 of an immense bay. 1829 01:17:41,208 --> 01:17:44,280 Was this the palace of King Nestor, huh? 1830 01:17:44,314 --> 01:17:48,318 No, no, this is an old Ottoman fortress 1831 01:17:48,353 --> 01:17:51,632 and from dates, this dates from the Ottoman Empire. 1832 01:17:51,667 --> 01:17:53,185 At Ottoman Empire 1833 01:17:53,220 --> 01:17:56,879 there are great savings on Ottomans of all sizes. 1834 01:17:56,913 --> 01:17:58,950 Open bank holiday Monday. 1835 01:17:58,984 --> 01:18:01,711 Put your feet up at Ottoman Empire. 1836 01:18:03,057 --> 01:18:07,268 Otterman. Half-otter, half-man. 1837 01:18:07,303 --> 01:18:10,030 New to the Marvel comic universe. 1838 01:18:10,064 --> 01:18:11,721 - Half-man, half.. - You could play him. 1839 01:18:11,756 --> 01:18:15,207 ...half useable foot stool storage facility. 1840 01:18:15,242 --> 01:18:16,426 "Have you heard what Steve's doing? 1841 01:18:16,450 --> 01:18:18,555 Now he's playing Otterman?" "What?" 1842 01:18:18,590 --> 01:18:20,454 "Yeah, you know, he thinks it can be good. 1843 01:18:20,488 --> 01:18:22,559 I read the script. It's awful." 1844 01:18:22,594 --> 01:18:24,527 "And he's gonna do it? Is he alright?" 1845 01:18:24,561 --> 01:18:28,324 "I don't know. I'm worried about Steve. 1846 01:18:28,358 --> 01:18:30,360 "He was doing so well 1847 01:18:30,395 --> 01:18:33,087 and then he... he signed up for Otterman." 1848 01:18:33,122 --> 01:18:35,469 Tell me a bit more about, tell me more about 1849 01:18:35,503 --> 01:18:37,885 uh, Steve Coogan's decision to play Otterman? 1850 01:18:37,920 --> 01:18:40,612 Well, this was towards the end of his life and I think... 1851 01:18:40,646 --> 01:18:42,407 Is that, well, you... you, you said that. 1852 01:18:42,441 --> 01:18:45,513 I... I want you to talk more about, his... his talent. 1853 01:18:45,548 --> 01:18:49,310 Well, I mean, talent is a very subjective thing, isn't it? I spent a lot of time with him. 1854 01:18:49,345 --> 01:18:51,081 Yeah, but we all know that he was a great talent 1855 01:18:51,105 --> 01:18:52,565 and what we want to know was why was he so great 1856 01:18:52,589 --> 01:18:54,799 so please, please, you know, just expand on that. 1857 01:18:54,833 --> 01:18:56,915 Well that's still a mystery to me. I mean, I spent a lot of... 1858 01:18:56,939 --> 01:19:00,252 Yes, but we... we... we know, we know it's a mystery to you. 1859 01:19:00,287 --> 01:19:02,427 What I want to know is why.. 1860 01:19:02,461 --> 01:19:04,532 Can you encapsulate in an sentence 1861 01:19:04,567 --> 01:19:06,362 the... the genius of Steve Coogan? 1862 01:19:06,396 --> 01:19:08,409 Well, not really, I mean, I will say I met a lot of people 1863 01:19:08,433 --> 01:19:10,090 over the years who didn't like him. 1864 01:19:11,401 --> 01:19:13,714 - We've not got much time left. - No. 1865 01:19:13,749 --> 01:19:15,164 Are you gonna miss me? 1866 01:19:15,198 --> 01:19:18,615 Oh, yes, and, and, no. 1867 01:19:18,650 --> 01:19:20,997 Yes and no. Bloody hell. 1868 01:19:21,032 --> 01:19:25,761 Find you very entertaining, but, uh, you can be exhausting. 1869 01:19:25,795 --> 01:19:27,935 Exhausting? Me? 1870 01:19:27,970 --> 01:19:30,731 Good God, you should meet you! 1871 01:19:30,766 --> 01:19:34,631 I have met me and, uh, we got on like a house on fire. 1872 01:19:37,220 --> 01:19:39,809 Is what they're saying it looked like? 1873 01:19:39,844 --> 01:19:41,822 - That looks like a, sort of.. - Yeah. That's incredible. 1874 01:19:41,846 --> 01:19:45,988 Looks like a halls of residence in a 1960s British university. 1875 01:19:46,022 --> 01:19:47,759 - Well, yeah, and what's wrong with that? - Isn't it? 1876 01:19:47,783 --> 01:19:49,612 That's modernism. That's Utopian Modernism. 1877 01:19:49,646 --> 01:19:54,824 That is incredible, that's, that's, that's 1200 B.C. that. 1878 01:19:54,859 --> 01:19:57,137 So that's 800 years before the Parthenon. 1879 01:19:57,171 --> 01:20:00,140 On "Grand Designs" imagine Kevin McCloud going back to.. 1880 01:20:00,174 --> 01:20:01,727 Yeah, and that's why it's amazing. 1881 01:20:01,762 --> 01:20:03,567 ...see if they're happy with their underfloor heating. 1882 01:20:03,591 --> 01:20:05,121 We are beginning to feel the pinch, Kevin 1883 01:20:05,145 --> 01:20:08,562 but we do, we do want to see it through because you know.. 1884 01:20:08,596 --> 01:20:10,426 Well... well.. It's our dream house. 1885 01:20:10,460 --> 01:20:12,369 It's the same amount of time between that and the Parthenon 1886 01:20:12,393 --> 01:20:13,947 is, is between us and the building 1887 01:20:13,981 --> 01:20:16,812 of Canterbury Cathedral. 1888 01:20:16,846 --> 01:20:18,365 And as the sun sprang up.. 1889 01:20:18,399 --> 01:20:19,849 Oh, you look very good there. 1890 01:20:19,884 --> 01:20:22,058 ...leaving the brilliant water in its wake. 1891 01:20:22,093 --> 01:20:23,415 You look like you've come to inspect 1892 01:20:23,439 --> 01:20:25,613 the building regulations. 1893 01:20:25,648 --> 01:20:27,719 Climbed the bronze dawn to show light 1894 01:20:27,753 --> 01:20:30,998 onto immortal Gods and mortal men. 1895 01:20:31,033 --> 01:20:35,278 The ship sailed into Pilos where people lined the beaches 1896 01:20:35,313 --> 01:20:38,385 sacrificing sleek black bulls to Poseidon. 1897 01:20:38,419 --> 01:20:41,112 [instrumental music] 1898 01:20:46,738 --> 01:20:50,880 Driving quite fast for a narrow road 1899 01:20:50,915 --> 01:20:52,744 if you don't mind me saying. 1900 01:20:52,778 --> 01:20:56,058 Thank you. There's a shortcut. 1901 01:20:56,092 --> 01:20:57,991 That's not the road though, is it? 1902 01:20:58,025 --> 01:20:59,905 - No, but it's what... - This is the road, here. 1903 01:21:02,892 --> 01:21:04,411 Are we allowed to do this? 1904 01:21:04,445 --> 01:21:05,999 - Am I allowed? - Yeah. 1905 01:21:06,033 --> 01:21:07,414 I was born allowed, me. 1906 01:21:08,484 --> 01:21:10,003 [instrumental music] 1907 01:21:10,037 --> 01:21:11,625 [engine revving] 1908 01:21:15,249 --> 01:21:17,389 Gotta "Top Gear" this, eh? 1909 01:21:17,424 --> 01:21:20,151 Oh, that is a bit of a ridge here, wow. Good Lord. 1910 01:21:20,185 --> 01:21:24,776 Without the, uh, prehistoric Neanderthal world views. 1911 01:21:38,963 --> 01:21:41,448 [instrumental music] 1912 01:21:41,482 --> 01:21:43,105 Well, this is it. 1913 01:21:43,139 --> 01:21:48,593 This is where King Nestor had a huge feast for Telemachus 1914 01:21:48,627 --> 01:21:50,319 two and a half thousand years ago. 1915 01:21:50,353 --> 01:21:51,872 Is that why they call it ox belly bay 1916 01:21:51,907 --> 01:21:53,943 because of all the bulls they sacrificed? 1917 01:21:53,978 --> 01:21:55,887 No, 'cause it's... it's the shape of an ox's belly. 1918 01:21:55,911 --> 01:21:58,741 Yeah, I know. Right, we've seen it, let's go. 1919 01:21:58,775 --> 01:22:02,193 See the mouth of the bay there, I reckon I could swim that. 1920 01:22:02,227 --> 01:22:05,058 I could swim that, it's hardly the Hellespont, is it? 1921 01:22:05,092 --> 01:22:07,060 It's not even Asos to Lesbos. 1922 01:22:07,094 --> 01:22:09,510 I'll race you. And my shoulder's better now. 1923 01:22:09,545 --> 01:22:10,971 I'm not Ra.. Come on, seriously, let's go. 1924 01:22:10,995 --> 01:22:12,548 Let's go. Come on. 1925 01:22:12,582 --> 01:22:13,756 Alright. 1926 01:22:13,790 --> 01:22:15,482 [phone ringing] 1927 01:22:18,174 --> 01:22:19,727 Hello? 1928 01:22:19,762 --> 01:22:20,970 Hello, Joe. 1929 01:22:21,005 --> 01:22:22,661 Hey, dad, um.. 1930 01:22:23,869 --> 01:22:24,869 Hey. 1931 01:22:25,975 --> 01:22:26,975 It's, uh.. 1932 01:22:28,012 --> 01:22:29,323 It's grandad. 1933 01:22:30,290 --> 01:22:31,739 Yeah, what about him? 1934 01:22:33,741 --> 01:22:35,674 I'm really sorry, he... he.. 1935 01:22:37,780 --> 01:22:40,334 - What? - I'm really sorry. 1936 01:22:44,269 --> 01:22:45,926 He's died. 1937 01:22:49,136 --> 01:22:50,931 I'm... I'm sorry, dad. 1938 01:22:56,799 --> 01:22:58,283 Are you okay? 1939 01:22:59,526 --> 01:23:03,806 Yeah. Yeah, I'm, I'm fine. 1940 01:23:03,840 --> 01:23:05,325 Are you okay? 1941 01:23:06,291 --> 01:23:08,673 Yeah. I'm.. 1942 01:23:11,987 --> 01:23:13,712 I'll come straight home. 1943 01:23:14,851 --> 01:23:15,991 Yeah. 1944 01:23:17,337 --> 01:23:18,683 Okay. 1945 01:23:20,340 --> 01:23:23,067 Alright, I'll, I'll see, I'll see you soon. 1946 01:23:23,101 --> 01:23:25,586 - Yeah. See you soon. - Love you. 1947 01:23:25,621 --> 01:23:27,899 Love you too. Bye. 1948 01:23:46,331 --> 01:23:49,265 [phone ringing] 1949 01:23:49,300 --> 01:23:51,129 Hey, Steve. 1950 01:23:51,164 --> 01:23:52,544 Hey, Emma. 1951 01:23:52,579 --> 01:23:54,788 I'm so sorry about your dad. 1952 01:23:54,822 --> 01:23:57,273 - Who... who told you? - Joe called me. 1953 01:23:57,308 --> 01:24:00,483 Listen, I've checked out all the flights and the best way home 1954 01:24:00,518 --> 01:24:02,796 is to get on the Ferry with Rob to Ithaca. 1955 01:24:02,830 --> 01:24:05,488 It stops at Sami in Kefalonia 1956 01:24:05,523 --> 01:24:06,845 and then you can get a direct flight 1957 01:24:06,869 --> 01:24:09,078 back to Manchester, okay? 1958 01:24:09,113 --> 01:24:10,424 Okay, great. 1959 01:24:10,459 --> 01:24:12,126 Um, Joe said that you're staying at Katherine's 1960 01:24:12,150 --> 01:24:14,566 and for you to stay there, is that okay? 1961 01:24:14,601 --> 01:24:16,672 Or would you rather I book you a hotel? 1962 01:24:16,706 --> 01:24:19,088 Ah, yeah, if that's what Joe wants, I'll go straight there. 1963 01:24:19,123 --> 01:24:23,403 Alright, okay. Um, listen, sending lots of love, okay? 1964 01:24:23,437 --> 01:24:25,232 Okay, bye-bye. 1965 01:24:25,267 --> 01:24:28,063 - Eighty-two. - Yeah, we got one only.. 1966 01:24:30,444 --> 01:24:33,068 [shuddering] 1967 01:24:36,036 --> 01:24:37,451 What's going on? 1968 01:24:39,522 --> 01:24:41,076 My dad's died. 1969 01:24:43,768 --> 01:24:45,459 What? 1970 01:24:45,494 --> 01:24:48,980 Yeah, so, um, I've gotta fly home. 1971 01:24:53,260 --> 01:24:56,505 Um, God. I'm sorry. 1972 01:24:56,539 --> 01:24:57,885 I... I'll drive. 1973 01:24:57,920 --> 01:25:01,544 No, I... I wanna drive, I wanna, to keep busy. 1974 01:25:05,548 --> 01:25:07,550 Look at all these butterflies. 1975 01:25:13,177 --> 01:25:15,144 [engine revving] 1976 01:25:24,257 --> 01:25:26,742 [intense music] 1977 01:25:40,376 --> 01:25:42,861 [instrumental music] 1978 01:25:53,044 --> 01:25:54,977 [foghorn blares] 1979 01:25:57,531 --> 01:26:00,534 [seagulls squawking] 1980 01:26:10,441 --> 01:26:12,926 [music continues] 1981 01:26:40,609 --> 01:26:43,094 [music continues] 1982 01:26:48,099 --> 01:26:50,584 [indistinct chatter] 1983 01:26:55,175 --> 01:26:57,626 [instrumental music] 1984 01:27:07,325 --> 01:27:10,155 [singing in foreign language] 1985 01:27:24,169 --> 01:27:25,516 Sami. 1986 01:27:26,620 --> 01:27:28,519 It's beautiful, isn't it? 1987 01:27:33,109 --> 01:27:34,697 And that's Ithaca. 1988 01:27:37,735 --> 01:27:39,702 Have to come back another day. 1989 01:27:39,737 --> 01:27:41,808 Yeah, we will. 1990 01:27:43,361 --> 01:27:45,708 [singing in foreign language] 1991 01:27:45,743 --> 01:27:48,539 Ah, I better go and get the bags. 1992 01:27:54,510 --> 01:27:57,168 Okay, I'll, uh, give you a call. 1993 01:27:57,202 --> 01:27:59,998 - Be strong. Yeah? - Yeah, yeah. Thanks. 1994 01:28:03,864 --> 01:28:06,315 [singing in foreign language] 1995 01:28:14,358 --> 01:28:16,808 [music continues] 1996 01:28:21,399 --> 01:28:24,057 [singing in foreign language] 1997 01:28:29,062 --> 01:28:31,720 [door creaking] 1998 01:28:50,394 --> 01:28:53,535 Gimme a wave! Gimme a wave! 1999 01:28:53,569 --> 01:28:55,191 [singing in foreign language] 2000 01:28:56,641 --> 01:28:58,298 [car horn honking] 2001 01:28:58,333 --> 01:28:59,610 Back again. 2002 01:29:02,164 --> 01:29:03,338 That's me. 2003 01:29:04,339 --> 01:29:05,961 I'm coming aboard. 2004 01:29:08,653 --> 01:29:10,828 I don't love your mother! 2005 01:29:12,174 --> 01:29:14,107 [horn blaring] 2006 01:29:22,771 --> 01:29:24,945 I'm going to the airport, yeah. 2007 01:29:24,980 --> 01:29:26,740 - Yes, sir. - How long does it take? 2008 01:29:26,775 --> 01:29:28,777 Forty-five minutes approximately. 2009 01:29:31,883 --> 01:29:34,369 [mellow music] 2010 01:29:35,439 --> 01:29:36,957 It's a bit windy. 2011 01:29:37,889 --> 01:29:39,753 You'll get blown away! 2012 01:29:42,100 --> 01:29:43,412 Oh, wow. 2013 01:29:43,447 --> 01:29:45,380 Mm. Mm! 2014 01:29:45,414 --> 01:29:47,382 Oh, my God! Ugh. 2015 01:29:47,416 --> 01:29:49,073 How windy is it? 2016 01:29:49,107 --> 01:29:50,350 Hi. 2017 01:29:52,041 --> 01:29:54,354 - God, I've missed you. - I've missed you too. 2018 01:29:54,389 --> 01:29:57,426 Oh, my Goddess. How nice to see you. 2019 01:30:03,777 --> 01:30:05,434 So, how's it been? 2020 01:30:05,469 --> 01:30:06,711 Agh. 2021 01:30:06,746 --> 01:30:08,264 It's, uh, been a bloody long journey 2022 01:30:08,299 --> 01:30:10,715 - I'll tell you that. - In Odyssey. 2023 01:30:10,750 --> 01:30:13,580 I didn't know Greece was so big. 2024 01:30:13,615 --> 01:30:16,134 But it's over now, you're home. 2025 01:30:27,387 --> 01:30:28,595 Wow. 2026 01:30:28,630 --> 01:30:31,184 [foghorn blaring] 2027 01:30:32,703 --> 01:30:35,257 [music continues] 2028 01:30:42,506 --> 01:30:43,921 Nice to be driving the car. 2029 01:30:43,955 --> 01:30:47,372 - Don't you normally? - No. I do not. 2030 01:30:47,407 --> 01:30:48,753 He doesn't let you? 2031 01:30:48,788 --> 01:30:50,790 It's not a question of letting me drive 2032 01:30:50,824 --> 01:30:53,275 he likes to drive, so I let him. 2033 01:30:53,309 --> 01:30:56,589 I let him drive. 2034 01:30:56,623 --> 01:30:58,418 Fair enough. 2035 01:30:58,453 --> 01:31:01,076 I like to drive. Ergh, I like to drive. 2036 01:31:01,110 --> 01:31:03,043 I like to be in control. 2037 01:31:03,078 --> 01:31:06,391 You got, you got your hands at ten-to-two, that's good. 2038 01:31:06,426 --> 01:31:09,187 But, eh, no, you can follow the line 2039 01:31:09,222 --> 01:31:11,258 the racing line. 2040 01:31:11,293 --> 01:31:14,917 You break into the bend. Accelerate out. 2041 01:31:14,952 --> 01:31:16,954 Are you glad I'm here? 'Cause you get to drive? 2042 01:31:16,988 --> 01:31:19,508 Yeah, 'cause I'm the boss. 2043 01:31:19,543 --> 01:31:23,823 I am glad you are here for a multitude of reasons. 2044 01:31:23,857 --> 01:31:26,964 It's so strange to be without the kids. 2045 01:31:26,998 --> 01:31:28,897 Welcome to my world. It's not, you know.. 2046 01:31:28,931 --> 01:31:30,519 Have you had a hard time? 2047 01:31:30,554 --> 01:31:35,662 It is hard, you miss the kids, yes, I don't apologize for that. 2048 01:31:35,697 --> 01:31:36,974 Not all fun and games. 2049 01:31:37,008 --> 01:31:40,529 No. It's mostly fun and games. 2050 01:31:44,740 --> 01:31:46,639 Poor Steve. 2051 01:31:46,673 --> 01:31:48,468 It's awful to lose your dad. 2052 01:31:58,996 --> 01:32:01,032 It's an amazing natural bay. 2053 01:32:01,067 --> 01:32:03,241 I can see why Odysseus wanted to get home, can't you? 2054 01:32:03,276 --> 01:32:05,036 - Look at it! - Yeah. 2055 01:32:05,071 --> 01:32:08,764 We should come back here when I'm in my 70s. 2056 01:32:08,799 --> 01:32:11,491 And I'm in my 60s. 2057 01:32:11,526 --> 01:32:14,321 I think, in all likelihood, and please don't take this 2058 01:32:14,356 --> 01:32:17,497 the wrong way, I do think by then I'll have married again. 2059 01:32:17,532 --> 01:32:19,741 - I'll have done a Rod. - Yeah. Fair enough. 2060 01:32:19,775 --> 01:32:21,846 And I'll be with a Pilates 2061 01:32:21,881 --> 01:32:23,814 instructor in her mid... 2062 01:32:23,848 --> 01:32:24,953 Very light... 2063 01:32:24,987 --> 01:32:26,575 Oh, yes, very flexible. 2064 01:32:26,610 --> 01:32:28,473 - Very bendy. Yeah. - Very broad-minded. 2065 01:32:28,508 --> 01:32:30,303 And, eh, now you'll have my money. 2066 01:32:30,337 --> 01:32:31,891 - Good, yeah. - So it's not all... 2067 01:32:31,925 --> 01:32:34,859 - It's not all doom and gloom. - No, no, no, no, no, no. 2068 01:32:34,894 --> 01:32:36,999 You'll have a nice place down in Torquay. 2069 01:32:37,034 --> 01:32:39,105 - Or here? - Well, no, not if I'm coming. 2070 01:32:39,139 --> 01:32:41,210 I wouldn't come here if you were here, would I? 2071 01:32:42,591 --> 01:32:45,180 I'd want to come just me and Consuela. 2072 01:32:53,395 --> 01:32:55,224 Hi, darling. 2073 01:32:55,259 --> 01:32:58,227 - Hi. - Hello. How are you? 2074 01:32:59,781 --> 01:33:01,058 Good, how are you? 2075 01:33:01,092 --> 01:33:02,542 Yeah, we, we're, we're, we're good. 2076 01:33:02,577 --> 01:33:04,302 - Hi, Chloe. - Yeah, yeah, we're both here. 2077 01:33:04,337 --> 01:33:06,442 Mummy's here, she's arrived. 2078 01:33:09,998 --> 01:33:12,552 [mellow music] 2079 01:33:25,738 --> 01:33:28,913 Ah, yes, ah, Penelope 2080 01:33:28,948 --> 01:33:32,158 how wonderful to see you again in our, gosh 2081 01:33:32,192 --> 01:33:35,955 crickey marital bed after all these years. 2082 01:33:35,989 --> 01:33:38,647 Penelope's not a very sexy name, is it? 2083 01:33:38,682 --> 01:33:42,202 Then I shall call you Penny, Moneypenny. 2084 01:33:44,549 --> 01:33:45,965 Is Sally a sexy name? 2085 01:33:45,999 --> 01:33:48,692 Oh, I'd say so. I think Sally's very sexy. 2086 01:33:48,726 --> 01:33:53,317 I am sure she's sexy actually, very, very sexy. Sexy Sally. 2087 01:33:58,494 --> 01:34:00,117 Thank you. 2088 01:34:00,151 --> 01:34:02,153 Very difficult to say you're from Mitcham. 2089 01:34:02,188 --> 01:34:04,500 You're from Mitcham. No, I'm from Edinburgh. 2090 01:34:04,535 --> 01:34:06,054 Well, you said you were from Mitcham. 2091 01:34:06,088 --> 01:34:07,583 No, I'm from Edinbur.. Alright, I can see... 2092 01:34:07,607 --> 01:34:08,884 Do you stop talking? 2093 01:34:08,919 --> 01:34:11,922 It's, eh, it's time to begin, right. Oh, goodness me. 2094 01:34:11,956 --> 01:34:14,476 I wondered where I left my phone. 2095 01:34:14,510 --> 01:34:17,617 When I make love, I make love for Queen and country 2096 01:34:17,652 --> 01:34:21,794 although I admit, making love to you would be a pleasure. 2097 01:34:21,828 --> 01:34:24,969 [music continues] 2098 01:34:33,771 --> 01:34:35,117 [doorbell dings] 2099 01:34:41,123 --> 01:34:42,677 [door latch clacks] 2100 01:34:46,715 --> 01:34:47,715 Hey. 2101 01:34:51,616 --> 01:34:52,687 Are you alright? 2102 01:34:52,721 --> 01:34:54,550 Yeah. Are you? 2103 01:34:55,690 --> 01:34:57,001 Yeah. 2104 01:35:00,349 --> 01:35:03,732 Let me take that. You got here quick. 2105 01:35:03,767 --> 01:35:05,009 Yeah. 2106 01:35:05,044 --> 01:35:07,046 Do you want a cup of tea or anything? 2107 01:35:07,080 --> 01:35:09,117 Yes, please. 2108 01:35:09,151 --> 01:35:12,051 Mum says you can have the spare room. 2109 01:35:12,085 --> 01:35:13,949 Great. Good. 2110 01:35:13,984 --> 01:35:15,744 Um, I'm sorry I wasn't here. 2111 01:35:17,159 --> 01:35:18,678 No, it's okay. 2112 01:35:21,094 --> 01:35:22,647 Were you with him? 2113 01:35:25,616 --> 01:35:28,343 Yeah. Yeah, I was. 2114 01:35:36,006 --> 01:35:38,629 [boat engine whirring] 2115 01:35:38,663 --> 01:35:41,597 [mellow music] 2116 01:35:58,787 --> 01:36:00,133 [snores] 2117 01:36:13,837 --> 01:36:16,771 [music continues] 2118 01:36:38,068 --> 01:36:39,414 [utensil clatters] 2119 01:36:46,939 --> 01:36:50,080 [music continues] 2120 01:37:09,547 --> 01:37:10,686 [sighs] 2121 01:37:16,209 --> 01:37:17,797 Hello, Steve. 2122 01:37:17,832 --> 01:37:19,834 Oh, hello. 2123 01:37:22,215 --> 01:37:24,735 Sorry to hear about your dad. 2124 01:37:24,769 --> 01:37:25,769 Thank you. 2125 01:37:27,048 --> 01:37:28,221 You okay? 2126 01:37:28,256 --> 01:37:30,983 Yeah, I'm fine. 2127 01:37:31,017 --> 01:37:34,055 Yeah. It's strange being back here after all these years. 2128 01:37:34,089 --> 01:37:35,539 Yeah, that it is. 2129 01:37:36,954 --> 01:37:38,749 How are you? 2130 01:37:38,783 --> 01:37:41,441 I'm good. Yeah. 2131 01:37:41,476 --> 01:37:43,236 Yeah, I'm good. Thank you. 2132 01:37:43,271 --> 01:37:46,274 Hey. It's.. It's time to go see grandad. 2133 01:37:46,308 --> 01:37:47,896 They'll take us. 2134 01:37:49,311 --> 01:37:51,555 Do you want me to come with you? 2135 01:37:51,589 --> 01:37:54,834 Um, no, I'll be fine. 2136 01:37:54,869 --> 01:37:57,181 You'll stay here till the funeral, won't you? 2137 01:37:58,527 --> 01:38:00,150 Oh, thank, yes, thank you. 2138 01:38:00,184 --> 01:38:03,325 [mellow music] 2139 01:38:18,271 --> 01:38:19,755 Quite shallow here. 2140 01:38:20,860 --> 01:38:22,310 Ah.. 2141 01:38:22,344 --> 01:38:24,381 Oh, it's very, argh. 2142 01:38:24,415 --> 01:38:28,005 Very pebbly. Oh, God. 2143 01:38:28,040 --> 01:38:30,283 Quite, argh. 2144 01:38:30,318 --> 01:38:32,423 Quite jagged on your feet. 2145 01:38:36,634 --> 01:38:37,497 Ah. 2146 01:38:37,532 --> 01:38:40,362 [engine rumbling] 2147 01:38:48,750 --> 01:38:52,754 He wept as he held the wife he loved 2148 01:38:52,788 --> 01:38:57,932 sole of discretion, in his arms at last. 2149 01:38:57,966 --> 01:39:01,797 Joy, warm is the joy felt by 2150 01:39:01,832 --> 01:39:05,905 shipwrecked sailors as they sight land.. 2151 01:39:07,424 --> 01:39:09,495 ...joyous too for her 2152 01:39:09,529 --> 01:39:14,017 the sight of her husband, vivid in her gaze 2153 01:39:14,051 --> 01:39:18,366 as her white arms embracing his neck 2154 01:39:18,400 --> 01:39:20,885 would never let him go. 2155 01:39:23,681 --> 01:39:25,787 I'm doing Anthony Hopkins. 2156 01:39:26,891 --> 01:39:28,755 I know. 2157 01:39:28,790 --> 01:39:30,619 [laughs] 2158 01:39:34,244 --> 01:39:35,762 I do love you. 2159 01:39:36,901 --> 01:39:38,248 You know that? 2160 01:39:44,357 --> 01:39:47,498 [instrumental music] 2161 01:40:17,114 --> 01:40:20,048 [music continues] 2162 01:40:59,674 --> 01:41:02,815 [singing in foreign language] 2163 01:41:35,572 --> 01:41:38,092 [singing in foreign language] 2164 01:42:06,568 --> 01:42:09,123 [music continues] 2165 01:42:13,541 --> 01:42:16,095 [singing in foreign language] 2166 01:42:49,473 --> 01:42:52,027 [singing in foreign language]