1
00:00:02,043 --> 00:00:04,443
Where do you want these?
Well, let's have a think...

2
00:00:04,443 --> 00:00:06,843
The table's here, we've got to sit
around it to have lunch,

3
00:00:06,843 --> 00:00:09,083
so maybe you should throw
them in the flowerbed.

4
00:00:09,083 --> 00:00:11,283
Very good, Ray, you should write
that down.

5
00:00:12,523 --> 00:00:15,123
By the way, your front nearside
tyre's bald.

6
00:00:15,123 --> 00:00:17,403
You need to get it replaced. OK.

7
00:00:17,403 --> 00:00:19,803
Have you, uh, sorted your pension
out?

8
00:00:19,803 --> 00:00:21,923
Are we really talking
about this on my birthday?

9
00:00:21,923 --> 00:00:24,083
Ray!

10
00:00:24,083 --> 00:00:26,203
Haven't you finished yet?

11
00:00:26,203 --> 00:00:28,923
Simon's dad and Melissa
will be here soon.

12
00:00:28,923 --> 00:00:31,443
Well, with his help,
we'll be done by Christmas.

13
00:00:31,443 --> 00:00:34,083
Those chairs are looking
a bit tatty.

14
00:00:34,083 --> 00:00:35,443
Well, it's all we've got,

15
00:00:35,443 --> 00:00:37,923
unless you want me to magic
a new set out of my arse.

16
00:00:37,923 --> 00:00:40,603
I need you today, Ray.
I really do.

17
00:00:44,043 --> 00:00:47,363
I've been thinking - when I get
married, I'd like a gazebo

18
00:00:47,363 --> 00:00:48,883
at my wedding reception.

19
00:00:48,883 --> 00:00:51,283
Why don't you concentrate
on getting a girlfriend,

20
00:00:51,283 --> 00:00:53,403
and worry about the awnings later?

21
00:00:53,403 --> 00:00:56,763
Yep. No... Point well made.
Stop shouting, David.

22
00:00:56,763 --> 00:00:59,483
Yes. Keep volume nice and low.

23
00:00:59,483 --> 00:01:01,803
Just getting prepared, mate,
aren't you? Just in case.

24
00:01:01,803 --> 00:01:03,323
Absolutely.

25
00:01:03,323 --> 00:01:05,283
Love can hit you
when you least expect it.

26
00:01:05,283 --> 00:01:08,723
I mean, you don't know,
but I might fall in love tomorrow.

27
00:01:08,723 --> 00:01:09,923
I bloody hope not.

28
00:01:09,923 --> 00:01:12,763
You're coming with me to pick a
load of plasterboard up tomorrow.

29
00:01:12,763 --> 00:01:14,243
And I'm not marrying you. Ah.

30
00:01:14,243 --> 00:01:16,043
HE CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY
Oh...

31
00:01:17,123 --> 00:01:20,723
Everything looks great.
Oh, I hope so, Donna.

32
00:01:20,723 --> 00:01:22,803
I've been up since five.

33
00:01:22,803 --> 00:01:25,243
Should be a nice day, shouldn't it?
Yes.

34
00:01:26,523 --> 00:01:27,923
To be honest, though...

35
00:01:29,003 --> 00:01:31,123
..I've been on and off the loo all
morning.

36
00:01:31,123 --> 00:01:33,483
Oh... Are you OK? Hmm...

37
00:01:33,483 --> 00:01:35,723
I thought I'd had
a funny grapefruit.

38
00:01:35,723 --> 00:01:37,683
I'm very sensitive to citrus.

39
00:01:37,683 --> 00:01:39,683
I'm the same with warm orange juice.

40
00:01:39,683 --> 00:01:41,603
It just goes through me like a tap.

41
00:01:43,003 --> 00:01:45,723
Oh... But actually,
I think it's nerves.

42
00:01:46,803 --> 00:01:50,363
Larry and I have hardly been
in the same room since he left.

43
00:01:50,363 --> 00:01:52,483
Oh, right, yeah, course. Yeah.

44
00:01:52,483 --> 00:01:54,603
Oh, listen to me going on!

45
00:01:54,603 --> 00:01:56,363
I've got to finish this.

46
00:01:56,363 --> 00:01:59,763
What is it? This is
my famous egg mayonnaise

47
00:01:59,763 --> 00:02:02,043
with secret ingredient.

48
00:02:02,043 --> 00:02:05,203
I've never, ever told
anybody what it is.

49
00:02:07,003 --> 00:02:09,283
Would you like to know what it
is, Donna?

50
00:02:10,883 --> 00:02:12,163
Uh, yeah?

51
00:02:13,203 --> 00:02:15,083
Oh. Right, well, I use egg,

52
00:02:15,083 --> 00:02:18,123
mayonnaise, salt, pepper and...

53
00:02:22,323 --> 00:02:25,683
..I use a teaspoon
of mustard powder.

54
00:02:30,843 --> 00:02:32,443
Oh, right.

55
00:02:32,443 --> 00:02:34,443
Thank you for that.

56
00:02:34,443 --> 00:02:36,003
Mum's the word. Yeah...

57
00:02:36,003 --> 00:02:38,323
I won't tell a soul.

58
00:02:38,323 --> 00:02:40,323
Do you want me to make the salad?

59
00:02:40,323 --> 00:02:43,323
You're a guest.
You can't be making the salad.

60
00:02:43,323 --> 00:02:44,803
No, I want to. Let me.

61
00:02:44,803 --> 00:02:47,963
Y-You... You just relax, Donna.

62
00:02:47,963 --> 00:02:49,843
I'll get you a drink.

63
00:02:49,843 --> 00:02:51,683
I'm all right for a drink, Sue,

64
00:02:51,683 --> 00:02:53,363
I really want to make the salad.

65
00:02:53,363 --> 00:02:56,043
Are you sure I can't get you a
drink? What about an orange squash?

66
00:02:56,043 --> 00:02:57,643
Or there's fresh orange in the shed?

67
00:02:57,643 --> 00:03:00,523
Sue, I really want
to make the salad.

68
00:03:00,523 --> 00:03:03,163
No... I'm not having it.

69
00:03:03,163 --> 00:03:04,363
SHE CHUCKLES

70
00:03:04,363 --> 00:03:06,683
I'm going to open you a bottle
of Shloer. Oh...

71
00:03:07,763 --> 00:03:11,883
It's Simon's 40th. I'd really like
to contribute to the day, please.

72
00:03:11,883 --> 00:03:14,363
I'm not having you going back
to the mainland and saying that

73
00:03:14,363 --> 00:03:17,803
I let you make lunch. Now, go on!
Go on, off you go.

74
00:03:17,803 --> 00:03:19,403
Go on, hop it. Heh!

75
00:03:19,403 --> 00:03:21,283
Hop it!

76
00:03:21,283 --> 00:03:23,003
SHE CHUCKLES

77
00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:24,483
Hop it.

78
00:03:25,563 --> 00:03:27,123
Andre...

79
00:03:28,283 --> 00:03:30,883
It's Sam's birthday today,
and we're having a little party

80
00:03:30,883 --> 00:03:33,643
in the garden.
So this is a bit inconvenient.

81
00:03:33,643 --> 00:03:35,003
COUGHING

82
00:03:36,203 --> 00:03:37,523
Oh, hello.

83
00:03:37,523 --> 00:03:41,083
This is Sheena. We met in the pub
last night. Oh, right...

84
00:03:41,083 --> 00:03:42,483
SHEENA COUGHS
Hello, Sheena.

85
00:03:42,483 --> 00:03:43,803
SHE SNIFFS

86
00:03:43,803 --> 00:03:45,563
Hi.
SHE COUGHS

87
00:03:45,563 --> 00:03:47,283
She's got the flu.

88
00:03:47,283 --> 00:03:48,603
Oh, dear!

89
00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:51,243
Is it all right if she waits in the
car till I finish the work, Ray?

90
00:03:51,243 --> 00:03:52,683
Andre...

91
00:03:54,443 --> 00:03:57,483
The point is... I won £100
in the fruit machine last night.

92
00:03:57,483 --> 00:04:00,003
Did ya? Right...

93
00:04:00,003 --> 00:04:03,163
I promised to take her to the
Premier Inn in Newport later... Oh.

94
00:04:03,163 --> 00:04:04,963
..so we can have sex.

95
00:04:04,963 --> 00:04:07,123
Oh, right. Well, look, sorry,
but...

96
00:04:07,123 --> 00:04:10,123
..we're in the garden, but you can
clear out the back shed.

97
00:04:10,123 --> 00:04:12,803
Right? And just try to stay
out of sight.

98
00:04:12,803 --> 00:04:14,603
OK? Thanks, boss. You're welcome.

99
00:04:14,603 --> 00:04:16,363
See you in a bit, Sheena.

100
00:04:16,363 --> 00:04:17,683
SHE REPLIES WEAKLY

101
00:04:17,683 --> 00:04:19,083
SHE GROANS

102
00:04:21,883 --> 00:04:24,843
Sue, please, is there anything
I can do to help?

103
00:04:24,843 --> 00:04:27,443
SHE TURNS OFF HOOVER

104
00:04:27,443 --> 00:04:29,283
Oh, sorry. I thought you were Sue.

105
00:04:29,283 --> 00:04:33,443
Oh, no, no. I'm Lyn,
Sue's friend from up the road. Oh...

106
00:04:33,443 --> 00:04:36,363
Nice to meet you.
You must be Donna. Yeah.

107
00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:38,643
Would you like a little
glass of white wine?

108
00:04:38,643 --> 00:04:40,963
Uh, no, no, I'm fine, thanks.

109
00:04:40,963 --> 00:04:43,043
Well, I'm going to have another one.

110
00:04:43,043 --> 00:04:45,523
It is a party after all, isn't it?
Oh-ho!

111
00:04:46,523 --> 00:04:48,163
POURING CONTINUES

112
00:04:48,163 --> 00:04:50,563
Sue tells me this is your first
time on the Isle of Wight.

113
00:04:50,563 --> 00:04:53,283
Uh, yeah...
Yeah, it's lovely, isn't it?

114
00:04:53,283 --> 00:04:56,323
I've been here nearly 20 years.
Moved here with my husband, Jack,

115
00:04:56,323 --> 00:04:58,803
for his work.
He was a prison officer.

116
00:04:58,803 --> 00:05:00,643
Oh, OK. Then he died.

117
00:05:00,643 --> 00:05:02,883
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

118
00:05:02,883 --> 00:05:06,203
But then my luck turned,
and I found my Ken.

119
00:05:06,203 --> 00:05:09,323
Second love of my life.
Oh! Well, that's nice.

120
00:05:09,323 --> 00:05:11,083
Then he died. Oh...

121
00:05:12,083 --> 00:05:14,203
Are you sure you don't want
a glass of white wine?

122
00:05:14,203 --> 00:05:16,723
No, no, honestly, I'm fine.
Oh! Donna...

123
00:05:16,723 --> 00:05:19,683
You're not too hot, are you?
Because I can open some windows.

124
00:05:19,683 --> 00:05:23,323
No, I'm OK. Thanks. Well, you let me
know if you want me to... OK.

125
00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:25,603
Oh, Sue. Sue! You'll like this.

126
00:05:25,603 --> 00:05:27,363
I was hoovering...

127
00:05:27,363 --> 00:05:29,403
..and Donna thought I was you!

128
00:05:29,403 --> 00:05:31,363
THEY LAUGH IN HIGH PITCH

129
00:05:31,363 --> 00:05:33,563
Did you, Donna? Yeah.

130
00:05:33,563 --> 00:05:36,283
Oh, Simon! Lyn was hoovering,

131
00:05:36,283 --> 00:05:38,123
and Donna mistook her for me.

132
00:05:38,123 --> 00:05:39,723
Did you? Yeah.

133
00:05:39,723 --> 00:05:42,003
She thought we look similar.
THEY LAUGH IN HIGH PITCH

134
00:05:42,003 --> 00:05:44,763
Oh, right... I've never really
thought about it.

135
00:05:44,763 --> 00:05:47,403
Oh! Ray!

136
00:05:47,403 --> 00:05:50,243
I was in the hall,
and Donna thought I was Sue!

137
00:05:50,243 --> 00:05:51,683
Oh-ho-ho-ho!

138
00:05:51,683 --> 00:05:53,483
She thinks we look similar!

139
00:05:53,483 --> 00:05:55,923
The eagles, as they say,
have landed.

140
00:05:55,923 --> 00:05:58,683
Oh! Ray. Ray! They're here.

141
00:05:58,683 --> 00:06:01,003
Come on, darling. Take your time.

142
00:06:01,003 --> 00:06:02,403
All right, Dad?

143
00:06:03,403 --> 00:06:05,723
Oh, bear with us, guys,

144
00:06:05,723 --> 00:06:08,043
Melissia had one too many
drinks last night.

145
00:06:08,043 --> 00:06:09,883
She's feeling a teensy bit fragile.

146
00:06:09,883 --> 00:06:11,923
I'm not... Oh, my God. In you go.

147
00:06:11,923 --> 00:06:13,803
HE CHUCKLES

148
00:06:15,803 --> 00:06:17,723
Nice of her to turn up pissed.

149
00:06:17,723 --> 00:06:19,843
HE SIGHS
Don't start, Ray...

150
00:06:23,403 --> 00:06:26,203
Hi, everyone. Hi, Sue. Hi, Larry.

151
00:06:26,203 --> 00:06:27,403
Hi...

152
00:06:28,683 --> 00:06:31,243
Oh... Can I get you anything,
Melissa?

153
00:06:31,243 --> 00:06:34,643
Oh, Sue, I feel so awful.
Oh, no!

154
00:06:34,643 --> 00:06:37,043
I shouldn't really be like this on
your birthday, Simon,

155
00:06:37,043 --> 00:06:39,763
I'm really sorry. That's...all
right. Don't worry about it.

156
00:06:39,763 --> 00:06:42,643
Is there anywhere she can have a bit
of shut eye for five minutes?

157
00:06:42,643 --> 00:06:45,483
Yeah. I just think if I
had a little power snoozy,

158
00:06:45,483 --> 00:06:47,563
I would feel so much better.

159
00:06:47,563 --> 00:06:50,723
Oh, well, you can have a little
lie-down on the sofa.

160
00:06:54,963 --> 00:06:56,643
No, I don't think so.

161
00:06:56,643 --> 00:06:57,803
Um...

162
00:06:57,803 --> 00:07:01,603
Is there anywhere else that
I could go where I could be alone

163
00:07:01,603 --> 00:07:03,403
and in complete darkness?

164
00:07:03,403 --> 00:07:05,763
We could stick you in the
chest freezer if you want.

165
00:07:05,763 --> 00:07:08,083
THEY CHUCKLE

166
00:07:08,083 --> 00:07:11,123
Well, she could lie on our bed,
couldn't she, Ray...?

167
00:07:11,123 --> 00:07:14,243
Oh, God, Christ, no. God!
I don't want to make a scene...

168
00:07:14,243 --> 00:07:17,043
I just... I just feel
really nauseous...

169
00:07:17,043 --> 00:07:18,523
Honestly, it's fine.

170
00:07:18,523 --> 00:07:21,243
Do you know what? No.
I've got this. I'm going to be fine.

171
00:07:21,243 --> 00:07:23,923
I'm going to be fine. I'll be fine
in a bit. Really, I will.

172
00:07:23,923 --> 00:07:26,283
If you want to have a lie down,
you have a lie down, darling.

173
00:07:26,283 --> 00:07:29,563
It's OK if she has a lie down,
isn't it, Sue? Yes, it's fine.

174
00:07:29,563 --> 00:07:32,643
MELISSA SOBS DRAMATICALLY

175
00:07:32,643 --> 00:07:35,723
David, will you show Melissa
up to our bedroom, please?

176
00:07:35,723 --> 00:07:37,243
At your service, milady.

177
00:07:37,243 --> 00:07:39,123
I just want to say, um...

178
00:07:39,123 --> 00:07:41,683
I'm so sorry. I hate making a fuss.

179
00:07:41,683 --> 00:07:43,483
I really do. I hate it. Hate it.

180
00:07:44,483 --> 00:07:46,563
I love you,
I love you... Sorry, Simon.

181
00:07:46,563 --> 00:07:48,243
S'all right. Come this way...

182
00:07:48,243 --> 00:07:51,803
I don't drink myself, so I've never
actually had a hangover.

183
00:07:51,803 --> 00:07:56,123
But what I famously overindulge in,
is Netflix and granola.

184
00:07:56,123 --> 00:07:58,963
SHE SIGHS IN EXASPERATION
Thanks...

185
00:07:58,963 --> 00:08:00,603
PAPER RIPS
Oh...!

186
00:08:02,083 --> 00:08:05,443
And it's from the exhibition
we went to!

187
00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:08,403
I'd forgotten about this! Yeah!

188
00:08:08,403 --> 00:08:12,163
Well, we remembered you liked it,
so Ray went back to get it for you.

189
00:08:12,163 --> 00:08:14,163
I love it, thank you!

190
00:08:14,163 --> 00:08:16,643
Now for my present.

191
00:08:16,643 --> 00:08:19,883
I was toying with the idea of giving
you a condolence card,

192
00:08:19,883 --> 00:08:22,803
which would've been superb,
seeing it's your 40th!

193
00:08:22,803 --> 00:08:26,443
HE LAUGHS

194
00:08:26,443 --> 00:08:28,683
Anyway, here's your present.

195
00:08:42,523 --> 00:08:44,403
Oh, brilliant. Thanks.

196
00:08:46,763 --> 00:08:48,963
Well, let's see what
it looks like on.

197
00:08:48,963 --> 00:08:50,763
I could have a guess.

198
00:08:50,763 --> 00:08:52,483
Yeah, let's have a look.

199
00:08:59,043 --> 00:09:02,323
Ooh! That's nice.

200
00:09:02,323 --> 00:09:03,923
That's really nice.

201
00:09:03,923 --> 00:09:06,923
Go on, then, Fonzie.
I'll have a milkshake. Ah.

202
00:09:06,923 --> 00:09:08,883
Very funny. Go on, turn round.

203
00:09:08,883 --> 00:09:10,803
No... Come on!
I'm not going to turn around.

204
00:09:10,803 --> 00:09:13,283
No, turn round, see if it
fits you nice and snug...

205
00:09:13,283 --> 00:09:15,683
No, you can say it as much as you
like, I'm not turning round.

206
00:09:15,683 --> 00:09:18,603
Wouldn't make much of a catwalk
model, would he, Sue? No!

207
00:09:18,603 --> 00:09:21,243
He looks like a prat.
No, joking apart, that's...

208
00:09:21,243 --> 00:09:23,563
It's really lovely.

209
00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:24,963
OK. Thanks.

210
00:09:27,643 --> 00:09:29,803
Would you like some more
quiche, Donna?

211
00:09:29,803 --> 00:09:31,763
Oh, no, no, I'm OK, thanks.

212
00:09:31,763 --> 00:09:33,643
You can have some of mine.

213
00:09:33,643 --> 00:09:37,083
Mum, she said she's OK and...there's
some left anyway. Oh!

214
00:09:37,083 --> 00:09:38,563
SHE CHUCKLES

215
00:09:40,643 --> 00:09:44,363
Ooh, this is a lovely drop of vino.
Is it, Lyn? Yes.

216
00:09:45,643 --> 00:09:49,083
It's... It's as if 100,000
little gooseberries...

217
00:09:49,083 --> 00:09:51,723
..had taken on a whole new
lease of life.

218
00:09:51,723 --> 00:09:53,003
SHE CHUCKLES

219
00:09:53,003 --> 00:09:55,763
Does it makes sense?
Absolutely. 100%.

220
00:09:55,763 --> 00:09:57,363
Well, it's very nice.

221
00:09:58,923 --> 00:10:01,243
Ooh! Simon...

222
00:10:01,243 --> 00:10:04,643
Tell your dad about your new job.
Ooh, spill the beans.

223
00:10:04,643 --> 00:10:08,523
Oh, well, I'm in London now.
Been there about six months.

224
00:10:08,523 --> 00:10:11,163
I'm sort of hoping to get some
bigger projects, but it's going...

225
00:10:11,163 --> 00:10:13,643
It's going all right. Yeah, it's
going well. Oh, it's nice to hear.

226
00:10:13,643 --> 00:10:16,483
Really good. Yeah, and we're going
to try and save a bit of money

227
00:10:16,483 --> 00:10:19,523
and get a deposit... Oh, here she
comes. Oh, God, she's back.

228
00:10:19,523 --> 00:10:21,603
Are you feeling better, my love?
Sorry, Simon.

229
00:10:21,603 --> 00:10:23,443
MELISSIA REPLIES, HE KISSES HER

230
00:10:23,443 --> 00:10:26,843
Come and sit down. Come on.
Hi, everyone. Over there. See?

231
00:10:26,843 --> 00:10:29,843
Come and sit here, there you go...
I'm OK here? Take it easy.

232
00:10:31,043 --> 00:10:33,443
Sorry. No, it's OK.
Just take it nice and easy.

233
00:10:33,443 --> 00:10:35,643
There you go.
SHE EXHALES, CHUCKLES

234
00:10:37,363 --> 00:10:39,363
Would you like something
to eat, Melissa?

235
00:10:39,363 --> 00:10:41,443
Oh, God, no. Uh, thank you.

236
00:10:41,443 --> 00:10:43,723
No, no, I just...

237
00:10:43,723 --> 00:10:46,843
I just don't think I can eat
anything right now.

238
00:10:46,843 --> 00:10:48,883
I can. Pass us the sausages.

239
00:10:48,883 --> 00:10:50,403
Oh, there you are.

240
00:10:52,243 --> 00:10:54,243
Sue, this is lovely.

241
00:10:54,243 --> 00:10:57,243
Oh, thank you, Donna.
That's very kind.

242
00:10:58,483 --> 00:11:00,283
Are you OK, darling?

243
00:11:00,283 --> 00:11:02,603
What's troubling you? Hm?

244
00:11:04,243 --> 00:11:05,643
Um, sorry...

245
00:11:06,643 --> 00:11:10,283
Is it OK if we move
the egg away from me? Please?

246
00:11:12,043 --> 00:11:14,963
Oh. Is that all right?
It's just that I can't stand the

247
00:11:14,963 --> 00:11:17,843
smell of eggs, and I just got
a massive whiff of it.

248
00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:20,883
And eggs are, like, literally my
worst nightmare. I'm really sorry.

249
00:11:20,883 --> 00:11:23,323
It's OK. We can move the egg.
MELISSA GROANS DRAMATICALLY

250
00:11:23,323 --> 00:11:25,243
It's OK to move the eggs,
Sue, isn't it?

251
00:11:26,363 --> 00:11:29,563
David, will you move the eggs,
please? Oh, uh, yes, yes, of course.

252
00:11:29,563 --> 00:11:32,523
Oh, Christ.
I just got another massive...

253
00:11:32,523 --> 00:11:34,403
..whiff of it. It's not your fault.

254
00:11:34,403 --> 00:11:37,323
Oh... Is that better for you now?

255
00:11:37,323 --> 00:11:40,763
Could you put a plate on it, Ray? Is
that OK? Then Melissa can't see it.

256
00:11:40,763 --> 00:11:42,723
Sorry, is that all right?

257
00:11:42,723 --> 00:11:45,803
Look, why don't I just pop it
in the kitchen

258
00:11:45,803 --> 00:11:47,803
and then I can top everyone up.

259
00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:50,803
Pass it to me.

260
00:11:50,803 --> 00:11:54,043
Thank you, thank you.
Oh. I fancied a bit more egg!

261
00:11:54,043 --> 00:11:56,483
But, oh... Don't worry about me.

262
00:12:01,483 --> 00:12:03,323
You OK, darling? Yeah.

263
00:12:05,803 --> 00:12:07,323
Melissa...

264
00:12:08,323 --> 00:12:10,963
Donna knows Anne Hegerty,
don't you, Donna?

265
00:12:10,963 --> 00:12:13,323
Uh, not really. I don't know her...

266
00:12:13,323 --> 00:12:15,203
What? Aw, who's Anne Hegerty?

267
00:12:15,203 --> 00:12:17,323
She's in the TV programme The Chase?

268
00:12:18,443 --> 00:12:20,003
The Chase.

269
00:12:20,003 --> 00:12:22,603
Donna used to live next door to her.

270
00:12:22,603 --> 00:12:24,123
It was the next village,

271
00:12:24,123 --> 00:12:25,763
but if you don't know her,

272
00:12:25,763 --> 00:12:27,363
then it doesn't mean anything.

273
00:12:29,563 --> 00:12:31,403
What's up, pal?

274
00:12:31,403 --> 00:12:33,003
Uh, hi, everyone.

275
00:12:33,003 --> 00:12:36,203
I won a bit of money on the
fruit machine last night. Oh!

276
00:12:36,203 --> 00:12:39,043
- So I bought you all a chocolate bar.
- Aw!

277
00:12:39,043 --> 00:12:40,483
How lovely!

278
00:12:40,483 --> 00:12:43,203
Oh, you shouldn't go spending
your money on us, Andre.

279
00:12:44,243 --> 00:12:45,883
Oh, thank you.

280
00:12:46,883 --> 00:12:48,243
Oh, thank you!

281
00:12:49,283 --> 00:12:51,243
Aw! Thank you...

282
00:12:51,243 --> 00:12:52,763
Ooh!

283
00:12:55,683 --> 00:12:58,283
Oh, me too...!

284
00:12:59,443 --> 00:13:02,203
I didn't get you one,
cos I don't know you.

285
00:13:02,203 --> 00:13:05,243
Hey, dude, that's not a problem.

286
00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:07,803
What a shame. Nice one, Andre.

287
00:13:07,803 --> 00:13:10,523
And, Sue, thanks for the wardrobe.

288
00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:14,563
Oh, you're welcome. I'm glad it
could be put to good use, Andre.

289
00:13:14,563 --> 00:13:17,563
Yeah, I burnt it to heat my caravan.

290
00:13:21,683 --> 00:13:23,563
I got that from John Lewis!

291
00:13:32,643 --> 00:13:35,683
So, how did you two meet, Melissa?

292
00:13:35,683 --> 00:13:37,523
Er...

293
00:13:37,523 --> 00:13:40,963
..um, are we OK
to talk about this?

294
00:13:40,963 --> 00:13:42,243
Er, Sue?

295
00:13:42,243 --> 00:13:43,643
That's fine.

296
00:13:43,643 --> 00:13:45,683
Well, let's do it.

297
00:13:46,843 --> 00:13:50,123
OK, all right, erm,
so I'm bisexual...

298
00:13:51,483 --> 00:13:56,523
Yeah, so before Larry and I met,
I was mostly into women.

299
00:13:56,523 --> 00:14:00,003
I guess I just really like
the female form.

300
00:14:00,003 --> 00:14:04,603
But I realised that sexuality

301
00:14:04,603 --> 00:14:07,123
isn't an exact science.

302
00:14:07,123 --> 00:14:09,283
It isn't.

303
00:14:09,283 --> 00:14:11,683
And after years of relationships

304
00:14:11,683 --> 00:14:14,403
with women, I met Larry.

305
00:14:15,763 --> 00:14:19,483
And I was just really surprised
and shocked...

306
00:14:20,643 --> 00:14:22,763
..to find him attractive.

307
00:14:24,603 --> 00:14:25,883
Thank you.

308
00:14:34,043 --> 00:14:35,763
Can I get you anything, Donna?

309
00:14:35,763 --> 00:14:37,443
I'm all right, thanks.

310
00:14:40,443 --> 00:14:43,723
So, do you still like women,
Melissa?

311
00:14:43,723 --> 00:14:45,803
David, pack it in!

312
00:14:47,763 --> 00:14:50,083
If you want to leave me,
I wouldn't blame you.

313
00:14:50,083 --> 00:14:52,083
I'd get out of this family
if I could.

314
00:14:52,083 --> 00:14:54,963
Oh, no, that's never
going to happen.

315
00:14:54,963 --> 00:14:59,723
Oh, yeah? But it might if your
mother doesn't stop fussing over me!

316
00:14:59,723 --> 00:15:01,363
Ooh, you just carry on.

317
00:15:01,363 --> 00:15:03,123
Don't mind me.

318
00:15:03,123 --> 00:15:04,723
All right, Mum.

319
00:15:04,723 --> 00:15:06,403
All right, Simon, out you go.

320
00:15:06,403 --> 00:15:08,483
What? Go on, tell him, tell him,
Donna.

321
00:15:08,483 --> 00:15:11,723
Do as your mum says.
Oh, right, yeah.

322
00:15:13,803 --> 00:15:15,843
Doo-doo-doo!

323
00:15:15,843 --> 00:15:18,523
Do you want to take the cake out,
Donna?

324
00:15:18,523 --> 00:15:22,283
It's all right, you can take it.
Oh, no, no, you take it out.

325
00:15:22,283 --> 00:15:24,163
No, you made it,
you should take it.

326
00:15:24,163 --> 00:15:26,163
Simon doesn't want me taking it out.

327
00:15:26,163 --> 00:15:28,563
Of course he does.
No, you take it out.

328
00:15:28,563 --> 00:15:30,163
OK, I'll take it.

329
00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:32,723
Would you light the candles?
Yeah.

330
00:15:32,723 --> 00:15:35,563
Now, just give me a sec,
cos I'm going to film it.

331
00:15:39,923 --> 00:15:43,363
# Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,

332
00:15:43,363 --> 00:15:45,443
# Happy birthday, dear Simon,

333
00:15:45,443 --> 00:15:47,563
# Happy birthday to you!#

334
00:15:47,563 --> 00:15:49,323
Hey, blow, blow!

335
00:15:49,323 --> 00:15:53,523
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

336
00:15:53,523 --> 00:15:55,163
Thank you.

337
00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:56,563
Oh!

338
00:15:56,563 --> 00:15:59,483
What?
Oh, it hasn't recorded.

339
00:15:59,483 --> 00:16:01,403
Now, why hasn't that recorded?

340
00:16:01,403 --> 00:16:03,443
Bloody hell, Sue!
What?

341
00:16:03,443 --> 00:16:05,083
You've got it on camera!

342
00:16:05,083 --> 00:16:06,843
GROANS

343
00:16:06,843 --> 00:16:08,403
Donna, can we do it again?

344
00:16:08,403 --> 00:16:10,243
I haven't videoed it.

345
00:16:10,243 --> 00:16:12,923
Are you serious, Mum?
Yeah, is that OK, Donna?

346
00:16:12,923 --> 00:16:15,603
Yeah, OK. We can't do it again,
it's mental.

347
00:16:15,603 --> 00:16:17,003
Oh, we can.

348
00:16:18,283 --> 00:16:20,283
Sorry about this, Melissa.

349
00:16:22,163 --> 00:16:24,363
Right, are you ready, Sue?

350
00:16:24,363 --> 00:16:27,083
Oh, no, hang on, hang on.
Yes, ready, Donna.

351
00:16:27,083 --> 00:16:30,643
# Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,

352
00:16:30,643 --> 00:16:35,443
# Happy birthday,
dear Simon, Happy birthday to you.#

353
00:16:35,443 --> 00:16:38,563
CHEERING

354
00:16:40,603 --> 00:16:42,243
Oh, I don't believe it.

355
00:16:42,243 --> 00:16:43,643
What now?

356
00:16:43,643 --> 00:16:45,443
It hasn't recorded again.

357
00:16:45,443 --> 00:16:46,723
Oh, Mum!

358
00:16:46,723 --> 00:16:48,563
Only joking!

359
00:16:48,563 --> 00:16:51,523
LAUGHTER

360
00:16:51,523 --> 00:16:54,003
Ooh!

361
00:17:03,683 --> 00:17:07,843
So, Melissa, how are you liking
living on the island?

362
00:17:07,843 --> 00:17:10,963
Erm, well, to be honest,

363
00:17:10,963 --> 00:17:13,283
I'm really struggling.

364
00:17:13,283 --> 00:17:15,123
Oh, no.

365
00:17:15,123 --> 00:17:17,003
Yeah, it's, erm...

366
00:17:17,003 --> 00:17:19,723
..it's hard, it's been hard.

367
00:17:19,723 --> 00:17:21,643
Yeah, I think what Melissa
is trying to say

368
00:17:21,643 --> 00:17:23,923
- and I don't want to put
words into your mouth, darling -

369
00:17:23,923 --> 00:17:28,003
but she worked in the fashion
business for so many years now...

370
00:17:28,003 --> 00:17:30,603
Oh! She's travelled
the world a hell of a lot,

371
00:17:30,603 --> 00:17:34,003
so living on the island,
she finds a bit...

372
00:17:34,003 --> 00:17:36,803
..claustrophobic.
Would I be right in saying that?

373
00:17:36,803 --> 00:17:38,443
Yeah, maybe.

374
00:17:38,443 --> 00:17:40,683
And she's just used to a certain
kind of person

375
00:17:40,683 --> 00:17:42,603
with a certain kind of zhuzh!

376
00:17:43,843 --> 00:17:46,083
Yeah, I guess so, yeah.

377
00:17:48,923 --> 00:17:50,803
Anybody want any wine?

378
00:17:50,803 --> 00:17:52,603
No, we've all got one, Lyn.

379
00:17:52,603 --> 00:17:54,563
Well, I'm getting one.

380
00:17:54,563 --> 00:17:57,123
Sorry, Larry, what was that
wonderful little word you just used?

381
00:17:57,123 --> 00:17:58,883
Mm? Oh, zhuzh.

382
00:17:58,883 --> 00:18:01,643
That's it. Wonderful. Zhuzh!

383
00:18:01,643 --> 00:18:03,923
Sorry about that, Melissa.

384
00:18:03,923 --> 00:18:06,323
I suppose the island isn't
for everybody.

385
00:18:06,323 --> 00:18:11,603
Well, Sue, I suppose sometimes
it can seem a little...

386
00:18:11,603 --> 00:18:13,123
..backwards.

387
00:18:13,123 --> 00:18:15,083
No, I've never said that.
No, I never said you have.

388
00:18:15,083 --> 00:18:17,763
Yeah, but it sounds like I've said
that and now you're making me

389
00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:19,203
come across like a bit of an arse!

390
00:18:19,203 --> 00:18:22,083
No, I'm so sorry, darling,
I didn't intend that at all.

391
00:18:22,083 --> 00:18:24,083
Everyone, please,
she didn't say that,

392
00:18:24,083 --> 00:18:25,843
she would never say that.

393
00:18:25,843 --> 00:18:27,763
Chardonnay!

394
00:18:27,763 --> 00:18:29,603
We've all got one, Lyn.

395
00:18:32,003 --> 00:18:35,243
So, Ray...

396
00:18:35,243 --> 00:18:38,043
..how long have you lived here?

397
00:18:38,043 --> 00:18:39,243
35 years.

398
00:18:39,243 --> 00:18:40,723
Wow!

399
00:18:40,723 --> 00:18:42,043
That's extraordinary.

400
00:18:42,043 --> 00:18:44,243
Down the hatch!

401
00:18:45,243 --> 00:18:47,923
Dad used to work on the ferries,
Melissa.

402
00:18:47,923 --> 00:18:49,803
He was one of their top engineers.

403
00:18:49,803 --> 00:18:51,723
I wouldn't say a top, David.

404
00:18:51,723 --> 00:18:54,843
Well, obviously, you've travelled
more than I have, Ray.

405
00:18:54,843 --> 00:18:58,403
Back and forth to Portsmouth
ten times a day.

406
00:18:58,403 --> 00:19:00,843
SHE LAUGHS

407
00:19:00,843 --> 00:19:02,283
Cheeky one!

408
00:19:02,283 --> 00:19:04,643
Lovely, lovely stuff.

409
00:19:04,643 --> 00:19:08,283
And you've never, ever wanted
to live anywhere else?

410
00:19:08,283 --> 00:19:11,043
No, no - we love it,
don't we, Suzie?

411
00:19:11,043 --> 00:19:15,403
Oh, yes, the Isle of Wight is our
own version of Paradise.

412
00:19:22,483 --> 00:19:24,323
I hope you don't mind me
saying this,

413
00:19:24,323 --> 00:19:26,883
and I mean, I know it was a long,
long, long, long time ago,

414
00:19:26,883 --> 00:19:30,763
but you and Larry,

415
00:19:30,763 --> 00:19:33,403
you just strike
me as such an odd couple.

416
00:19:39,163 --> 00:19:40,403
Oh...

417
00:19:40,403 --> 00:19:42,083
Huh?

418
00:19:42,083 --> 00:19:45,563
Yeah, I mean, I just can't imagine
you being together.

419
00:19:47,803 --> 00:19:50,403
Humph.

420
00:19:52,683 --> 00:19:55,323
Mm, yes, yes.

421
00:19:55,323 --> 00:19:59,963
A definite hint of aggressive
lemon peel.

422
00:20:03,483 --> 00:20:05,963
I'll just clear away the plates.

423
00:20:05,963 --> 00:20:07,683
I'll help you. Thank you.

424
00:20:11,723 --> 00:20:14,923
Sorry we have to go, but
we're meeting up with some

425
00:20:14,923 --> 00:20:17,203
of Melissa's friends
later for a drink.

426
00:20:17,203 --> 00:20:19,803
Oh, well, nice to see you both.
Yeah.

427
00:20:19,803 --> 00:20:21,883
Well, good to see you, Donna.

428
00:20:21,883 --> 00:20:24,883
Bye. Look after this one -
he needs it!

429
00:20:26,603 --> 00:20:28,283
Yeah.

430
00:20:28,283 --> 00:20:31,163
Mustn't leave it so
long next time, eh?

431
00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:33,083
No, you should pop over to
ours at some point.

432
00:20:33,083 --> 00:20:35,723
Yeah, what I mean is we're going to
San Fran at the end of the summer,

433
00:20:35,723 --> 00:20:37,843
and I'm sure we can sort
something out.

434
00:20:37,843 --> 00:20:40,603
Yeah, that'd be great, yeah.
Larry? Yeah.

435
00:20:42,283 --> 00:20:44,563
Bye. Bye, Dad.

436
00:20:48,763 --> 00:20:51,123
Andre, step back from the car.

437
00:20:51,123 --> 00:20:52,803
Yeah. That's a good lad.

438
00:20:52,803 --> 00:20:55,403
What's that?
That's the dead rats!

439
00:20:55,403 --> 00:20:57,963
Oh, Jesus Christ!
Found them in Ray's shed.

440
00:21:01,923 --> 00:21:03,643
SIGHS

441
00:21:07,603 --> 00:21:09,963
Mum? What?

442
00:21:09,963 --> 00:21:11,683
Well, what did that mean?

443
00:21:11,683 --> 00:21:13,523
I don't know why your dad
bothers turning up.

444
00:21:13,523 --> 00:21:16,203
Well, at least he did.
Well, as usual, it's all about him.

445
00:21:16,203 --> 00:21:18,643
Well, and her!
Not now, Mum, please.

446
00:21:18,643 --> 00:21:20,843
What's going on? Nothing.
Can you stay out of it?

447
00:21:20,843 --> 00:21:23,403
Suzie? We're just talking about
Larry.

448
00:21:23,403 --> 00:21:25,603
Oh, right, well, you know
what I think about him.

449
00:21:25,603 --> 00:21:27,683
Well, here we go, this should be
good. Oh, I'm sorry.

450
00:21:27,683 --> 00:21:29,243
can't I have an opinion
in me own house?

451
00:21:29,243 --> 00:21:31,803
Everything all right?
Yes, everything's fine, Donna, love.

452
00:21:31,803 --> 00:21:34,003
Can I get you a glass of Shloer?
No, I'm OK, thank you.

453
00:21:34,003 --> 00:21:36,683
Oh, no, go on, let me get you a
glass. Mum, she said she's OK.

454
00:21:36,683 --> 00:21:38,243
Can you stop fussing, please?

455
00:21:38,243 --> 00:21:40,083
Have a bit of respect
for your mother.

456
00:21:40,083 --> 00:21:41,923
Well, why don't you have a bit
of respect for me dad?

457
00:21:41,923 --> 00:21:43,803
You've been digging
at him all afternoon.

458
00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:45,923
I have, and I wouldn't piss on him
if he was alight!

459
00:21:45,923 --> 00:21:48,243
Oh, Ray, stop it.
Well, when's he going to wake up?

460
00:21:48,243 --> 00:21:50,003
We all know he's not going
to visit him.

461
00:21:50,003 --> 00:21:51,963
You love making me feel
uncomfortable, don't you?

462
00:21:51,963 --> 00:21:53,883
For goodness' sake, both of you.

463
00:21:53,883 --> 00:21:55,883
You don't even try and get
on with my dad, do you?

464
00:21:55,883 --> 00:21:57,363
At least he makes an effort.

465
00:21:57,363 --> 00:22:00,323
He makes an effort?!
He didn't want to even come today.

466
00:22:00,323 --> 00:22:01,883
Ray! What are you on about?

467
00:22:01,883 --> 00:22:04,923
He told me he got tickets for the
Goodwood races and he got all

468
00:22:04,923 --> 00:22:08,163
Bolshie when I told him he should be
here to celebrate your 40th.

469
00:22:08,163 --> 00:22:09,643
You're enjoying this, aren't you?

470
00:22:09,643 --> 00:22:11,803
I'm just telling you,
that's your dad for you, Simon.

471
00:22:11,803 --> 00:22:13,403
I'm going home. Good - about time!

472
00:22:13,403 --> 00:22:15,443
And I know you're making Mum
sell the house and I know

473
00:22:15,443 --> 00:22:17,643
she doesn't want to, but it's all
about you, Ray, isn't it?

474
00:22:17,643 --> 00:22:19,283
Shut up, Simon!

475
00:22:32,083 --> 00:22:33,803
Are you going to tell him, Dad?

476
00:22:33,803 --> 00:22:35,203
What?

477
00:22:37,203 --> 00:22:38,603
He should know.

478
00:22:38,603 --> 00:22:40,003
What should I know?

479
00:22:42,483 --> 00:22:44,723
Doesn't matter?
No, you said it now.

480
00:22:44,723 --> 00:22:47,883
What do I need to know, David?
What do I need to know?

481
00:22:48,963 --> 00:22:53,163
He's been having some tests
on his heart.

482
00:22:53,163 --> 00:22:54,923
What?

483
00:22:54,923 --> 00:22:57,403
They think he's got the
beginning of heart disease.

484
00:22:59,603 --> 00:23:01,363
How long have you known, Ray?

485
00:23:01,363 --> 00:23:05,163
I've gone a bit downhill
since Christmas, if I'm honest.

486
00:23:05,163 --> 00:23:09,003
But, I mean, I'm 72,
and that's what happens.

487
00:23:09,003 --> 00:23:10,723
None of us are getting any younger.

488
00:23:10,723 --> 00:23:12,963
No, but you've got an appointment,
haven't you, love?

489
00:23:12,963 --> 00:23:15,963
Next month on the mainland
with the top specialist.

490
00:23:15,963 --> 00:23:19,043
He's one of the best. He'll open me
up, have a rummage round

491
00:23:19,043 --> 00:23:20,523
and then put me back to normal.

492
00:23:20,523 --> 00:23:22,363
Well...

493
00:23:22,363 --> 00:23:24,243
..why didn't you tell me?

494
00:23:24,243 --> 00:23:27,163
We didn't want to spoil
your weekend, son.

495
00:23:28,443 --> 00:23:31,923
That's why we're moving, love,
Ray needs to be closer to the shops,

496
00:23:31,923 --> 00:23:33,643
it'll be easier for him.

497
00:23:33,643 --> 00:23:37,683
Sue! I've found a bottle of fizzy
in the kitchen!

498
00:23:37,683 --> 00:23:39,163
Anyone want a drop?

499
00:23:45,563 --> 00:23:47,523
The old pisshead's drank half of it!

500
00:23:50,523 --> 00:23:53,803
I'm sorry, Ray,
I didn't mean what I said.

501
00:23:53,803 --> 00:23:55,243
Ah...

502
00:23:55,243 --> 00:23:57,603
..it's just water under the bridge.

503
00:23:59,603 --> 00:24:01,683
I want us to get on.

504
00:24:01,683 --> 00:24:04,243
Well, miracles do happen.

505
00:24:08,123 --> 00:24:10,203
Oh, yeah,

506
00:24:10,203 --> 00:24:12,683
I'm thinking of asking Donna
to marry me.

507
00:24:12,683 --> 00:24:14,523
That's great.

508
00:24:14,523 --> 00:24:15,803
That's good.

509
00:24:17,163 --> 00:24:18,803
You've got a good 'un there.

510
00:24:18,803 --> 00:24:20,563
Yeah.

511
00:24:20,563 --> 00:24:22,003
So has she.

512
00:24:27,203 --> 00:24:29,523
MUSIC STARTS

513
00:24:29,523 --> 00:24:31,003
Do you fancy a dance?

514
00:24:31,003 --> 00:24:32,403
Piss off!

515
00:24:35,043 --> 00:24:39,243
Don't Stop by Fleetwood Mac

516
00:24:45,723 --> 00:24:49,643
# If you wake up
and don't want to smile

517
00:24:49,643 --> 00:24:52,483
# If it takes just a little while...

518
00:24:52,483 --> 00:24:54,963
Oi! Simon!

519
00:24:54,963 --> 00:24:57,003
No, no, no, no!
Oh, yeah!

520
00:24:57,003 --> 00:24:58,963
Come on! No, no!

521
00:24:58,963 --> 00:25:01,763
Have a dance with your old mother!

522
00:25:01,763 --> 00:25:04,003
Go on, have a dance
with your mum!

523
00:25:08,323 --> 00:25:10,843
Woo!

524
00:25:10,843 --> 00:25:12,923
Hasn't it been a lovely day?

525
00:25:12,923 --> 00:25:14,963
It's been a wonderful day.

526
00:25:14,963 --> 00:25:18,843
# Yesterday's gone...#

527
00:25:24,923 --> 00:25:28,123
There's something I need to say
to you.

528
00:25:28,123 --> 00:25:29,963
What's that? Fire away!

529
00:25:29,963 --> 00:25:31,923
Er...

530
00:25:31,923 --> 00:25:33,963
..if er...

531
00:25:33,963 --> 00:25:37,123
..if you're ever feeling lonely...

532
00:25:38,323 --> 00:25:40,363
..I'm just down the road.

533
00:25:41,603 --> 00:25:44,083
Ooh! Oh!

534
00:25:44,083 --> 00:25:45,803
OK.

535
00:25:45,803 --> 00:25:47,883
That's very good of you.

536
00:25:47,883 --> 00:25:49,843
I'm serious.

537
00:25:49,843 --> 00:25:51,323
Thank you.

538
00:25:53,523 --> 00:25:55,323
Do you want a drink?

539
00:25:57,803 --> 00:25:59,443
Do you want me to take
a photo of you all?

540
00:25:59,443 --> 00:26:01,683
Yeah!

541
00:26:01,683 --> 00:26:04,483
Donna, you've got to be in it,
because you're part of the family.

542
00:26:04,483 --> 00:26:07,843
Oh, I'll put it on timer then.

543
00:26:09,803 --> 00:26:12,203
Oh, yes, quick, everybody.

544
00:26:14,003 --> 00:26:16,923
Er, Simon, before you go, do you
think we can get together for a few

545
00:26:16,923 --> 00:26:19,683
hours and go through your pension
plan I've got for you?

546
00:26:19,683 --> 00:26:21,403
Have a day off, Dad!

547
00:26:22,883 --> 00:26:26,883
# All I want is to see you smile

548
00:26:26,883 --> 00:26:30,763
# If it takes just
a little while

549
00:26:30,763 --> 00:26:34,803
# I know you don't believe
that it's true

550
00:26:34,803 --> 00:26:37,403
# I never meant any harm to you

551
00:26:38,563 --> 00:26:42,643
# Don't stop thinking about tomorrow

552
00:26:42,643 --> 00:26:46,003
# Don't stop, it'll soon be here

553
00:26:47,003 --> 00:26:49,843
# It'll be better than before

554
00:26:49,843 --> 00:26:53,563
# Yesterday's gone,
yesterday's gone...#