We do not care about the mental health,
the psychological conditions amongst your men,
just so long as you keep... winning.
Three hundred and twenty miles.
For Paddy Mayne to function,
he needs someone to rebel against.
I'm perfect for the job, don't you think?
Mission completed.
We leave Italy to the ordinary soldiers now.
We--we're going home.
The Italian government has fallen.
The Italian guards have left the camp.
We have 20 minutes to get free.
We've got ten minutes!
Back the other way!
Bloody hell!
Follow me!
Just leave it!
Come on! Come on!
We've got to hide!
Push!
Give me some of that!
- Gimme some of that! - The Germans are coming!
No, get off! That's mine!
Stirling!
Stirling, come on! The Germans are on the hill.
We don't have much time.
We need to take our chances before the Germans arrive.
- What news of my men? - What are you talking about?
I've had no news for 15 days. My men, the SA-fucking-S.
- Are they alive? - Well, the reports I heard,
they're most of the reason the Italian government fell.
Now I hear they're on their way home.
Go on, get that down you.
That's the first I've heard about it.
Can you believe that?
Hey, listen up.
So...
That was Italy.
Some craic, wasn't it?
Some craic.
Our grand old tour of Europe...
began here.
But who knows where our itinerary will take us next?
But first...
John!
- Yes! - John!
All right, mate?
Hey.
Tonkin, you'd better tell these what you got up to,
'cause they'll not believe me.
Well, er... I was captured.
They were gonna shoot me, I escaped and then, er...
An angel came and scooped you up.
Ooh, Tinky-Tonkin.
Er, something like that.
No, you won't believe me if I told you, erm, but...
Er, what I will say is...
me standing here now, you all standing here now.
It is living proof that someone up there... likes us.
- Yeah. - Yes.
So, we are... unstoppable.
I'll drink to that, Tonk!
He's back!
Thank you, sir. Thank you.
Get the whisky!
Hande hoch!
Aah!
Hande hoch!
Schnell! Schnell! Schnell!
Los! Los! Los!
This place is a maze.
It has been a fort, church, monastery.
There's holes everywhere.
What do we do with holes, David?
We hide in them.
You said the Allied troops are advancing.
Soon they will be here.
The Germans are not coming to secure this prison.
They are coming to take the prisoners away
and ship us all back to Germany,
but... they'll have to find us first.
Find a hole, sit tight,
wait for 'em to leave.
The only person who was better than me at playing hide-and-seek
was my mad sister, yes, and she was once missing for three days.
Listen, hide-and-seek is best played by individuals,
otherwise one tends to start giggling.
Mwah! Good luck, old boy.
- David? - Yes?
Are you sure you're quite all right?
Oh, God, no. Not sure at all.
Come on, Jack!
They're here! We need to hide. Quickly!
Los!
Nichts.
Was ist da oben?
Weiss nichts.
Komm.
Los.
Oh, my God.
Wake up, boys!
You're home.
Give us a fucking lie in, will ya?
Old time boys.
Cor blimey. Haven't seen 'em for a while.
Feels like it's all over.
Paddy said it's just begun.
How long we got at home, Paddy?
Till the whistle blows and the second half begins.
You can spend half-time brushing up on your French.
♪ There'll be bluebirds over ♪
♪ The white cliffs of Dover ♪
♪ Tomorrow ♪
♪ Just you wait and see ♪
♪ There'll be bluebirds over ♪
♪ The white cliffs of Dover ♪
♪ Tomorrow ♪
♪ Just you wait and see ♪
♪ I'll never forget ♪
♪ The people I met ♪
♪ Braving those angry skies...♪
Michael.
Daddy!
Hey!
♪ The light of hope ♪
♪ In their eyes ♪
♪ And though I'm far away ♪
♪ I still can hear them say ♪
♪ Bombs up ♪
♪ But when the dawn comes up ♪
♪ There'll be bluebirds over ♪
♪ The white cliffs of Dover ♪
♪ Tomorrow ♪
♪ Just you wait and see ♪
♪ There'll be Love and laughter ♪
♪ And peace ever after ♪
♪ Tomorrow ♪
♪ When the world is free ♪
♪ There'll be bluebirds over ♪
♪ The white cliffs of Dover ♪
♪ Tomorrow ♪
♪ Just you wait and see ♪
♪ But give me enough Of the fine old stuff ♪
♪ That's made near Galway Bay ♪
♪ Come gougers All from Donegal ♪
♪ Sligo and Leitrim, too ♪
♪ We'll give them the slip And we'll take a sip ♪
♪ Of the rare old Mountain Dew ♪
The mist will bring the brown trout up.
It'll be a good day.
Aye, and the mist will hide us from the bailiffs.
It'll be a grand day all round, I'd say.
Mist and fog are always our friends.
So, the sand of the desert
couldn't keep your soul buried, Eoin?
Ah, no.
I missed the fog...
and the water, the fish.
You.
I missed you.
I'm not sure I can forgive myself...
for any of it.
You see, I keep waking up and finding myself alive,
no matter how hard I try.
It's like a horse race,
but actually you're riding on a carousel.
So, there's no chance your horse
will overtake the one in front,
and the one behind you will never catch you up.
The horse in front is contentment.
The horse behind you is death.
There I am.
Lieutenant-Colonel Robert Blair Mayne,
sitting on a plaster fucking horse
unable to get off the fucking carousel.
You sure got off the carousel though, didn't you?
I was spun off.
That was not my choosing.
No, you got off to stick around in the desert.
It was the desert where we were most easily ourselves.
Ah, yeah, the desert.
When it was the desert and you and me.
You and me.
Paddy.
You don't think you'll make it to Berlin, do you?
It's not reaching Berlin that concerns me.
It's this.
The aftermath, sitting in a boat,
sitting on a tractor, sitting at a desk.
And nothing comes at you,
nothing comes whizzing or exploding
or punching or stabbing.
It's just air.
Just the dead fucking air.
Fuck.
Please help us!
- We're British! - Please!
- They're leaving us to drown! - Please, stop the boat!
Stop the boat!
Here...
least when the air is empty, when there's no fucker there,
least I'll always have company.
Aye.
At least from now on, I'll never truly be alone.
Oh, God.
Get me up. Get me free. Get me through the war.
And get me a drink.
As you can see, I've, erm,
taken a bit of a tumble from the wagon.
Do you mind?
- Ah! - To victory.
Yeah, sorry, I, erm...
I don't, uh...
I don't really drink toasts to anything anymore.
It's a rather odd ceremony to...
offer up a sip of a thing that's destroying your sanity
for the sake of some good cause or other.
Your mind is surviving. I see that.
And you have changed.
I can see that.
I was obliged to kill people.
I was good at it.
But I have learned that I'm not so good at what comes next.
- What, you mean you feel regret? - No.
I feel horror at my lack of regret.
How was your journey home?
I took a flight with
Lieutenant-Colonel Bill Stirling.
I got a message that you wanted to see me
as soon as I got back to England.
What was so urgent?
Er...
I really can't remember.
But I... I could make an educated guess,
what with you being French
and what likely comes next in the conduct of the war.
In the next few months,
I imagine you'll become rather important.
Important how?
Ah, well...
like almost everything else
in this crucial moment in the war,
that is a secret.
By the left, quick march!
HQ. Oh, hello, sir.
Come.
At ease.
Take a seat.
First, Colonel Stirling,
congratulations from Winston Churchill himself
on your part in redrawing that map.
Mr Churchill has a fondness for the SAS
stretching back to Africa.
And we, too, on behalf of the Allied Force Headquarters,
now have a very high regard for your men
and what they are able to achieve.
Why is it that all this praise and niceness
is making me nervous?
As you know, preparations are well under way
for the invasion of Northern Europe.
We've explored a range of possible invasion points
along the French and Dutch coasts.
And done it in such a way that German intelligence
will believe that all of them are possible.
Current thinking in Berlin is that
we will attack the Hook of Holland,
thanks to tireless deception work carried out
by Dudley Wrangel Clarke and British intelligence.
May I say before you continue that wherever it is decided
the main invasion force should land,
I hope that all the earlier flattery
was not an attempt to solicit the SAS
to once again act as shock troops.
No. That is not what this meeting is about.
- Quite the opposite, in fact. - AFHQ believe
the best use of the SAS would be in advance of the main invasion.
1SAS and 2SAS would be dropped behind coastal defences.
- How far behind? - Thirty miles.
And how far in advance of the main invasion?
- Thirty-six hours. - Thirty-six hours?!
Their task would be to establish positions
and then to disrupt every attempt by the enemy
to reinforce the coastal defences
at the actual point of invasion.
This would be nothing more than a suicide mission!
No other regiment was even considered for this vital role.
Because deep, deep, deep down,
somewhere in the corridors of military power,
there is a resentment against the SAS,
against my brother, and against the success we have achieved.
Actually, old man, everyone pretty much knows
the success is almost entirely down to Paddy Mayne.
Ah.
Who you would have killed in action
or shot dead, executed,
to protect the conventional troops
who will take all the glory.
The SAS have proven their worth, and they are best used
arriving where they are least expected.
Well, this plan would be unexpected because it is insane.
- I am leaving this meeting. - Sit down.
- We have other matters-- - The answer is no,
and I will fall on my sword over it!
You may not need to fall on your sword, Colonel Stirling.
If you continue to question orders,
there are those inside GHQ
who will happily stab you in the back.
Dismissed.
Aah!
I surrender! Please!
Don't shoot! Please!
Prepare, prepare,
the iron helm of war.
Bring forth the lots, cast in the spacious orb.
Th' Angel of Fate turns them with mighty hands.
- You! - And casts them out
upon the darken'd earth.
- Stop! - Prepare.
Oh. Oh!
Can I help you with something, officer?
You were seen running through the village.
A mother and her children heard you talking.
They thought you might be talking
into one of those radios. - And they thought perhaps
I was a one-man German invasion
come to Northamptonshire all alone?
I'll need to see identity papers. Come on.
I am a soldier, but I'm not German.
- I'm Irish. - And why were you running?
Because for a man in my condition,
running is the same as walking.
- Plus I am in a hurry. - To get where?
London.
- You're going to London on foot? - Aye.
What that lady and her children heard was me reciting poetry,
which in my madness, I am very fucking prone to do.
Lieutenant-Colonel Robert Blair Mayne.
Special Air Service. You deliver mail?
If there's gonna be an invasion,
I am always first with the news.
That's why I'm going to London.
There's gonna be a wee invasion,
and I think they want me to be a part of it.
Actually, officer, I'm running late for my first meeting.
So in the name of His Majesty the King,
I need to borrow your bike.
Borrow my... borrow my bike.
Fuck...
♪ Sing as we go And let the world go by ♪
♪ Singing a song, We march along the highway ♪
♪ Say goodbye to sorrow ♪
♪ There's always tomorrow ♪
♪ To think of today ♪
♪ Sing as we go, although The skies are grey ♪
♪ Beggar or king, You've got to sing a gay tune ♪
Oh, fuck.
- Where is he? - He's waiting for you, General.
♪ ...make it right worthwhile ♪
♪ So sing ♪
♪ As we go along ♪
Colonel Stirling isn't alone.
His companion cycled all the way down the corridor
with his hands off the handlebars.
This fucking regiment.
♪ As we go ♪
♪ Along ♪
Whoever you are, a general just walked in the room.
The arm I use to salute is a wee bit stiff, sir.
I fell off my bike in Hendon in my haste to get here.
Colonel Stirling, what is the meaning of all this?
And what the fuck is he doing here?
What I am doing here, sir,
is giving my professional opinion on your plan.
You shared a classified plan of operation without permission?
As I recall from our last meeting,
General Montgomery insisted the entire success
of the SAS in Italy was down to Paddy Mayne.
So why wouldn't I share
what you're still daring to call "the plan" with him?
Thirty miles behind the lines.
Thirty-six hours before the invasion.
- Oh, glory to the fallen. - That information is top secret.
If it's 30 miles behind, 36 hours before,
it'll make no difference where in France your forces land.
My regiment will all be dead
by the time you set foot on the beach.
Right, so, to be clear,
you are sharing classified information,
and from what I am hearing, you are suggesting
that you would disobey a direct order!
No, no. No, no, sir.
I would go alone myself. That I would do.
But I would not ask my men to come with me,
since most of my men are quite keen to live,
whereas I am, at best, equivocal.
Oh, and--and the other problem with your plan, sir,
is that it would not work.
If you drop us into France 36 hours before,
it'd only take one gust of wind
to blow one parachute into the arms of the enemy.
They would put two and two together
and begin to work out where the invasion point is.
And you would be giving them 36 hours to prepare.
Since it's you...
and especially you...
...I will share your concerns with General Montgomery.
And, Colonel Stirling, your conduct in this matter
will be noted at the very highest level.
Fuck!
Goodness. Were you and I just on the same side?
Goodness, I... I think we were.
And from what I could tell,
by your man's wee outburst just there,
you might have just sacrificed your military career
to save the SAS.
I told you in Cairo.
My brother was this regiment's midwife.
I am not prepared to be its coroner.
Also in Cairo, I told you,
you had done nothing to earn my respect.
Chopped down no trees,
cut up no logs, fed no fires.
Please don't say anything nice to me. It'd be too confusing.
Will they listen to us, do you think?
A rather grand old spy has invited me for drinks tonight.
I understand you're invited, too.
Aye, I got a note.
- Cocktails at The Ritz. - Hmm.
Did the grand old spy say what the meeting is about?
No. But I'm guessing it will either be a celebration,
fond farewell...
...or an execution.
Your single malt whisky, sir.
Thank you.
Ah.
Now behave.
Mm!
Paddy.
So...
you are the "grand old spy."
That's how my commanding officer described you.
Oh.
Well, Paddy I've, er,
I've called you here to give you some good news.
Should we, erm, order some champagne?
No, no.
I'm sound, thank you.
What good news?
Well, I've heard from AFHQ
that Montgomery has agreed to think again
about the SAS's involvement in the coming invasion.
And he's changed his mind, Paddy, because of you.
He holds you in high regard.
Well, I thought you'd be pleased.
For myself the manner of my passing is a detail,
so being excused a suicide mission
is of no consequence.
But my friend, Bill Stirling,
is afraid that, come what may,
the knives are now officially out for him.
And he's your friend and your commanding officer?
Aye. That is some achievement.
Is my friend right to be concerned about knives?
"And in his silence, he spoke a thousand words."
Let's drink a toast
to common sense and second thoughts
and see what the night brings.
You know, I can recall
a drunken conversation around a fire
in which somebody said the SAS was invented by a spy
who wore Chanel dresses.
Was that you?
Er...
Well...
These days I prefer a less elaborate couture,
but, yes, it was I who started
this whole extraordinary process.
Which makes you, Paddy Mayne, my offspring.
And every young German that you strangle
is on my account with God.
So, you could say the SAS is kind of a lethal poem
from the imagination of a deranged poet.
Give me that fucking flask.
Bravo!
Thank you.
We'd now like to invite you to the floor...
- Ah! - ...for our next number,
"Fools Rush In."
Two spies at the same table.
And a secret to be revealed.
Who said that war couldn't be fun?
French '75.
Er... Er, two, please.
What?
It's going to be a difficult evening.
What exactly is this meeting about?
My creator, over here, said something about the truth.
There now, all four of us are gathered.
So, now we can begin.
Where exactly did Paddy suggest we meet?
He said he was invited somewhere fancy.
And where he goes, we should be allowed to go.
- Night-night, ladies! - Enjoy yourselves!
Fuck off!
Mm-mm.
Mm-mm-mm.
Mm.
Mmm. Ah!
Tomorrow morning, intensive preparations
will begin for the invasion of France.
Paddy Mayne and 1SAS will be deployed
to the Highlands of Scotland at 7:00 a.m.
Which is why my boys are now all safely tucked up in bed.
2SAS will be deployed to Scotland in three days' time.
And to complete the triangle, Eve Mansour will be deployed
to the same camp a day later.
Yes, Colonel Stirling,
Eve was briefed this morning by General de Gaulle himself,
which is why I've called this meeting.
General de Gaulle has ordered Eve
to act as liaison between the British and French SAS,
who will fight together as part of the invasion force.
So, Eve will be deployed to the Ayrshire camp,
as will you, Colonel Stirling.
So, the two of you... will be working closely together.
Officers and liaisons will be cooped up in close quarters,
living cheek by jowl for several months.
Are you trying to make a point of some kind?
Of a particular kind.
Allied Force HQ have heard a rumour.
They need to know the status of your relationship
with the new French liaison officer.
What do Allied Force HQ need to know exactly?
There is nothing that needs to be known about our relationship.
This is fucking absurd.
Colonel Stirling, I ask you again,
is there anything that needs to be known?
If the rumour is that we are sleeping together,
then the rumour is wrong. We are not and will never.
Oh, no, no, no, no. Not my business.
Well, it will be your business if it affects
your preparations for invasion.
It'll be left to you to deal with the mess.
- "The mess"? - Yes, there is a mess.
AFHQ have decided to open an inquiry
into your close relationship in Italy...
with a French spy.
Okay.
Okay...
Dudley Wrangel Clarke.
AFHQ's bitter little emissary of bitter little messages.
I made the mistake
of questioning an order and then being proven right,
thus proving someone else wrong.
And this is how revenge is taken.
Very well.
To avoid an entirely unnecessary yet embarrassing inquiry,
I will tender my resignation in the morning,
as I suspect you knew I would.
And you can tell those that sent you,
the feud between the British Crown
and the ancient clan Stirling
which began in 1715 is entirely mutual.
And then, please...
Tell 'em to fuck off.
Sometimes my job is terribly difficult.
Particularly in matters of the heart.
You fucking bastard.
That was highly entertaining.
A spiteful officer class vendetta
amounting to the removal of an effective officer
right ahead of the most important operation of the war.
- I'm just acting on instruction. - Who will replace him?
Oh, you know, someone far less effective.
But then the "officer class" knows
that in truth the SAS is run by you, so what do they care?
You just carry out their orders.
Yes.
♪ Open up your heart and then ♪
War's a dirty business.
Isn't it?
I don't know.
I just cut throats.
I don't break hearts.
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
Thank you, thank you.
We'd like to invite you onto the floor
for a slightly livelier number, "Roll 'Em."
The SAS have arrived!
Ladies, the men are here!
Oh, ho-ho-ho, look out!
Standards must have dropped in here, I'd say.
All right, Pad.
Gentlemen, the Maître D' has asked you to please leave.
These men are under my command.
Why would they be taking instructions from you?
Groups of military in uniform greater than five
are not allowed into the restaurant and bar area.
I must have counted 25 American soldiers all in uniform.
That is a special celebration. We do make exceptions.
Oh, when the bribe's right, is it?
Chewing gum, cigarettes? Yankee dollars?
All we've got is scars.
Sir, if you need help escorting these gentlemen out,
we are United States Marines.
I really don't think you Brits can afford these prices.
Pardon me?
This is The Ritz.
I really don't think you Brits can--
Come on!
♪ Be a man, can, a mystery man ♪
♪ Be a doll, be a baby doll ♪
♪ It can't be fun, not anyway ♪
♪ It can't be found, No way at all ♪
♪ A distant man Can't sympathise ♪
♪ He can't uphold His distant laws ♪
I owe you a stout, Reg.
You all right, sweet pea?
Children, children, children, children.
"My" children.
Soldiers of the Special Air Service,
you have a very early day tomorrow.
And you have a war to win.
Okey-dokey.
Let's make tracks.
See you in Paris, sweet pea.
Gentlemen, please!
♪ Be a man, can, a mystery man ♪
♪ Be a doll, be a baby doll ♪
♪ It can't be fun, not anyway ♪
♪ It can't be found, No way at all ♪
There is literally, literally nothing here.
Aye, there is. Look, there's a bush there, look.
And, er, there's a tree, cowering in the wind.
And then there's-- there's rocks.
And above that's the sky.
And above that's God.
God never got round to this place.
I actually think it's quite beautiful.
And if the rest of you fuckers would fuck off
and if Hitler would fuck off, then I could easily see myself
living out the rest of my days here.
What we gonna drink, Paddy?
Melted snow and rabbit's blood.
And we're gonna kill red deer stags with our teeth.
Oh, it's gonna be a grand adventure out here, boys.
♪ Neat, neat, neat ♪
♪ She ain't got no name to call, neat, neat, neat ♪
Loaded. Clear behind.
I do hope nobody was in there.
♪ Be a man, can, a mystery man ♪
Ready...
Go!
Remember what we talked about.
Hit the bicep, hit the nerve. Go again.
What time do you have, Pad?
Three minutes. Absolute shite, boys.
Oi! That was you, you fat bastard!
Load 'em up!
You missed a spot.
Oh, shit.
Oh!
- Halt! - Oh, shit.
Los! Los! Los!
Jesus.
- Halt! - Fuck!
We have a special place designed for men like you.
Dear David...
I have resigned.
So, no Stirlings will participate
in the assault on Europe.
Our men are gathering in great numbers near our family home.
They're to be trained in a new level of total war.
The regiment has been saved from a certain suicide mission
and been given one which is merely insanely reckless.
The men of the SAS are now in the rough hands
of your friend and mine.
I'm sure their next adventure will make us both proud.
Your loving brother...
Bill.
Last night, I shot and shattered a bottle of brandy
belonging to the French battalion.
This is by way of recompense.
I learned in Africa
that my communication with the French
is best conducted through medium of dead deer.
Can I come in?
Of course.
♪ If you believed in... ♪
Please, sit anywhere.
I have news.
I already know what happened to David.
I received a letter yesterday.
He said they have sent him to a castle in the clouds.
I believe the castle is called Colditz Castle.
- Is that bad? - It's far from good.
But he will escape.
He will try, that is fucking certain.
Actually, my news is not about David.
In my capacity as commanding officer,
I have been sent here to relay to the French liaison
the exact date of the invasion of France.
Hang on one second.
Tell me.
The first advance party
of British SAS invasion units will land in France...
tonight.
I myself only found out last night,
so I've come to tell you.
Your French boys will be deployed tomorrow.
- Then I will see you in France. - You're coming, too?
How could I not?
So, who's gonna eat the fucking deer?
We will win, Paddy.
That is the intention.
Will you try to stay alive?
That is the intention.
You see, I'd quite like to see Berlin.
And after that, who knows?
After that you will be David's best man at his wedding.
I will make sure of it.
That gramophone there-- is that a wind-up one?
Yes, it's all I could find here.
Then you won't be needing it?
No, I won't be needing it.
Well, if you don't mind.
Paddy, what are you going to do with a record player
in the middle of an invasion?
The boys are tired of my singing, so...
if on some battlefield between Normandy and Paris
you hear "Whiskey in the Jar" played at full volume...
you'll know I'm close.
We shall not fail or falter,
we shall not weaken or tire.
Neither the sudden shock of battle
nor the long-drawn trials of vigilance and exertion
will wear us down.
Give us the tools, and we will finish the job.
Paddy!
What the fuck is that?
It's a gramophone, Reggie.
A record player.
I thought it'd be nice to have some music to listen to.
- Music? - Aye.
I'm gonna take it into France with us,
and then we can all listen to some music together.
Paddy, are you fucking mad?
Of course he's bloody mad. We're all bloody mad.
And how do you plan on getting that down to the ground?
Oh, I've all that worked out, Reggie boy.
I'm gonna strap it to my left leg
and then be sure to land on my right.
Watch the records, Pad!
Whoo-hoo!
♪ As I was going over ♪
♪ The far-famed Kerry mountains ♪
Sing up, boys, sing up! - ♪ I saw Captain Farrell ♪
♪ And his money He was counting ♪
♪ I first produced my pistol ♪
♪ And then produced my rapier ♪
♪ Saying stand and deliver ♪
♪ For I am your bold deceiver ♪
♪ Musha-ring dumma-do-damma-da ♪
♪ Whack for the daddy-o ♪
♪ There's whiskey in the jar ♪
♪ I went unto my chamber ♪
♪ For to take a slumber ♪
♪ I dreamt of gold and jewels ♪
♪ And for sure It was no wonder ♪
♪ But Jenny took my charges ♪
♪ She filled them up With water ♪
♪ And sent for Captain Farrell to be ready ♪
♪ For the slaughter ♪
♪ Musha-ring dumma-do-damma-da ♪
♪ Whack for the daddy-o ♪
♪ There's whiskey in the jar ♪
Stand!
You ask, what is our aim?
I can answer in one word-- victory.
Victory at all costs.
Victory in spite of all terror.
Stand!
And fucking deliver!
♪ Ain't no woman in the world I know ♪
♪ Walk all over ♪
Yeah! Ow!