1 00:00:00,410 --> 00:00:01,730 Come on, Emily. Time to go. 2 00:00:01,730 --> 00:00:04,180 Oh, my God. It's 7:05! 3 00:00:04,180 --> 00:00:06,420 How is it so early and we're already so late? 4 00:00:06,420 --> 00:00:08,510 Phone. Where's my phone? 5 00:00:08,510 --> 00:00:10,010 Where's my phone? Babe, I'm sorry. 6 00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:11,720 I can't pretend to care where your phone is right now. 7 00:00:13,470 --> 00:00:14,430 Hon, call it, please. 8 00:00:14,430 --> 00:00:16,510 Okay. 9 00:00:16,510 --> 00:00:17,560 Hey, where's my phone? 10 00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:19,020 Jo? Jo, where's my phone? 11 00:00:19,020 --> 00:00:20,520 Really, babe? I need it! 12 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:21,940 I need ‐‐ Mom, Mom. [ Whistles ] 13 00:00:21,940 --> 00:00:23,480 Could you call my phone, please? 14 00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:24,810 Yeah. It's ringing. [ Cellphone vibrating ] 15 00:00:24,810 --> 00:00:26,900 Shut up! Everyone shut up! 16 00:00:28,360 --> 00:00:31,150 Oop. Got it. 17 00:00:31,150 --> 00:00:32,490 Call mine. Yeah. 18 00:00:32,490 --> 00:00:33,660 [ Cellphone vibrating ] 19 00:00:33,660 --> 00:00:35,950 Wa‐ah! Ooh! 20 00:00:37,620 --> 00:00:38,700 Good morning. 21 00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:43,790 Mom, could you at least help us get Emily's shoes on, please? 22 00:00:43,790 --> 00:00:45,130 Yeah, I‐I‐I would love to, but ‐‐ 23 00:00:45,130 --> 00:00:47,340 [ Retches, spits ] 24 00:00:47,340 --> 00:00:49,460 ...I'm very busy. 25 00:00:49,460 --> 00:00:50,880 Busy being disgusting or...? 26 00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:52,430 No! [ Laughs ] 27 00:00:52,430 --> 00:00:54,890 No, I'm harvesting my saliva. 28 00:00:57,010 --> 00:00:59,810 I'm doing it for an Ancestry DNA kit. 29 00:00:59,810 --> 00:01:02,890 They take three test tubes of spit 30 00:01:02,890 --> 00:01:06,730 and weave together the tapestry of your heritage. 31 00:01:06,730 --> 00:01:08,070 Weave the what? 32 00:01:08,070 --> 00:01:09,650 Bill, get the lunches, please. 33 00:01:09,650 --> 00:01:10,900 Emily, put your shoes on. 34 00:01:10,900 --> 00:01:12,650 Why? Because we have to go to school. 35 00:01:12,650 --> 00:01:13,990 I don't want to go to school! 36 00:01:13,990 --> 00:01:17,370 I don't want to do anything I'm doing, so... 37 00:01:17,370 --> 00:01:19,830 Fine, if you don't want to put on your shoes, 38 00:01:19,830 --> 00:01:21,290 Mommy will just put them on for you. 39 00:01:21,290 --> 00:01:22,750 [ Screams ] 40 00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:26,830 I'm not even touching you. 41 00:01:26,830 --> 00:01:28,380 [ Singsong voice ] Carpool's here! 42 00:01:28,380 --> 00:01:30,340 It is way too early for that. 43 00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:32,590 Early? It's 7:09. 44 00:01:32,590 --> 00:01:34,800 I've already taken 30,000 steps and read the Bible. 45 00:01:37,010 --> 00:01:39,510 And I fixed your mailbox on the way in. 46 00:01:39,510 --> 00:01:41,350 I was gonna get to that this weekend. 47 00:01:41,350 --> 00:01:43,850 Yeah, well, it was on my "to‐do for you list." 48 00:01:43,850 --> 00:01:45,810 And I know you don't respect breakfast, 49 00:01:45,810 --> 00:01:48,110 so I brought over some organic granola. 50 00:01:48,110 --> 00:01:49,230 Thank you. 51 00:01:49,230 --> 00:01:50,980 Sometimes you're a nice brother. 52 00:01:50,980 --> 00:01:51,900 It's for Sandy. 53 00:01:53,570 --> 00:01:55,450 Thank you, Chuy. 54 00:01:55,450 --> 00:01:56,740 I'm sure I'll enjoy it 55 00:01:56,740 --> 00:01:58,660 as soon as I replenish my saliva. 56 00:02:00,330 --> 00:02:01,620 Mm. 57 00:02:01,620 --> 00:02:03,410 Chuy, you are an inspiration. 58 00:02:03,410 --> 00:02:05,040 Honestly, I don't know why these two 59 00:02:05,040 --> 00:02:06,960 can't get out the door in the morning. 60 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,750 Well, behind every man is a great woman just doing it all. 61 00:02:09,750 --> 00:02:11,670 You know, my wife, Brie. 62 00:02:11,670 --> 00:02:12,840 Hey, Bill? 63 00:02:12,840 --> 00:02:14,340 It's too bad Jo can't do it all. 64 00:02:14,340 --> 00:02:15,470 Right, Bill? 65 00:02:17,430 --> 00:02:19,850 I'm gonna go get my bag. 66 00:02:19,850 --> 00:02:22,060 Oh, Bill, Bill, can you get the check for the day care? 67 00:02:22,060 --> 00:02:23,640 Wait, what did you just say? 68 00:02:23,640 --> 00:02:25,140 The check for the ‐‐ 69 00:02:25,140 --> 00:02:26,350 Day care? 70 00:02:26,350 --> 00:02:28,690 My beautiful goddaughter's in day care? 71 00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:31,610 [ Spits ] Exactly! 72 00:02:31,610 --> 00:02:34,190 This child is a genius. 73 00:02:34,190 --> 00:02:36,320 She needs to be in preschool. 74 00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:38,610 Well, good reason she's not. 75 00:02:38,610 --> 00:02:39,950 We forgot to apply. 76 00:02:39,950 --> 00:02:41,200 [ Scoffs ] 77 00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:42,830 You forgot? 78 00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:44,620 Well, you know how it is with your second kid ‐‐ 79 00:02:44,620 --> 00:02:45,660 sort of forget you have them? 80 00:02:47,420 --> 00:02:50,630 Alright, so, Lulu's just gonna rot for a year 81 00:02:50,630 --> 00:02:52,170 with a bunch of dum‐dum babies? 82 00:02:52,170 --> 00:02:53,800 Hey, hey! 83 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:55,630 Some of them are toddlers. 84 00:02:55,630 --> 00:02:57,680 Okay, I will fix this. 85 00:02:57,680 --> 00:02:59,340 I'll put in a word with Rainbow Beginnings. 86 00:02:59,340 --> 00:03:02,350 It's where my kids went, and they're perfect. 87 00:03:02,350 --> 00:03:04,600 These kids aren't. 88 00:03:04,600 --> 00:03:07,350 Yeah, thanks, Chuy, but we can take care of our own kids. 89 00:03:07,350 --> 00:03:08,940 Let's go. Bill, get the stroller. 90 00:03:08,940 --> 00:03:09,850 Okay. 91 00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:17,860 [ Chuy laughs ] 92 00:03:25,660 --> 00:03:26,660 ♪♪ 93 00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:36,170 ♪♪ 94 00:03:43,350 --> 00:03:44,970 [ Keys clatter ] 95 00:03:46,850 --> 00:03:48,060 Oh, my God. 96 00:03:48,060 --> 00:03:49,850 It's 7:05. 97 00:03:49,850 --> 00:03:53,190 How is it so early and feels so late? 98 00:03:53,190 --> 00:03:56,320 So, is there just always traffic now? 99 00:03:56,320 --> 00:03:57,690 Is that it? 100 00:03:57,690 --> 00:03:59,030 Let's homeschool the kids. 101 00:03:59,030 --> 00:04:00,280 [ Chuckles ] 102 00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:01,820 Because of traffic? 103 00:04:03,530 --> 00:04:04,580 Maybe. 104 00:04:06,330 --> 00:04:07,330 What's for dinner? 105 00:04:07,330 --> 00:04:08,660 [ Sighs ] 106 00:04:08,660 --> 00:04:10,830 Why does there have to be dinner every night? 107 00:04:12,630 --> 00:04:14,790 Do you think there's any chance in the world 108 00:04:14,790 --> 00:04:16,670 your mom made dinner for us? 109 00:04:16,670 --> 00:04:18,710 I just had the most wonderful dinner. 110 00:04:21,090 --> 00:04:23,300 I'm so glad I took that cooking‐for‐one class. 111 00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:25,010 Oh, yum! 112 00:04:27,970 --> 00:04:30,270 We can't keep going across town every day 113 00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:32,140 for the next three years. 114 00:04:32,140 --> 00:04:34,610 Maybe you should take Chuy up on his advice. 115 00:04:34,610 --> 00:04:37,270 I mean, I looked at the website for Rainbow Beginnings, 116 00:04:37,270 --> 00:04:39,320 and it looks like a terrific preschool. 117 00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:41,450 And it's a block away from Emily's school. 118 00:04:45,570 --> 00:04:47,240 It is? 119 00:04:47,240 --> 00:04:49,700 Anyway, I'm dying to get my test results back 120 00:04:49,700 --> 00:04:51,290 from the DNA thing. 121 00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:54,040 I know we're Irish, but this is an Italian nose. 122 00:04:56,290 --> 00:04:58,710 Somebody had an affair. 123 00:04:58,710 --> 00:05:01,420 As...urgent as that is, 124 00:05:01,420 --> 00:05:03,970 babe, how did we not know that Rainbow Beginnings is so close? 125 00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,760 We got to do this. 126 00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:08,310 I mean, it's one drop‐off. 127 00:05:09,470 --> 00:05:10,560 That's the dream. 128 00:05:12,350 --> 00:05:15,810 Do we... dare to dream? 129 00:05:18,110 --> 00:05:19,940 I had penne for dinner. 130 00:05:19,940 --> 00:05:21,490 Oh, fun fact! 131 00:05:21,490 --> 00:05:23,450 "Penne" means "penis"! 132 00:05:23,450 --> 00:05:25,490 Who knew?! 133 00:05:25,490 --> 00:05:28,740 Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. 134 00:05:28,740 --> 00:05:30,200 Sweetheart, with one drop‐off, 135 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:31,870 I could actually get to work on time. 136 00:05:31,870 --> 00:05:33,790 You know, they never promote me 'cause I always show up sweaty, 137 00:05:33,790 --> 00:05:35,580 and, you know...they never promote the sweaty guy. 138 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:40,920 Yes, but Lulu loves it where she is. 139 00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:42,470 I mean, she's made friends. 140 00:05:42,470 --> 00:05:44,380 True, true. Pulling her out right now would be traumatic. 141 00:05:44,380 --> 00:05:46,340 You're right. 142 00:05:46,340 --> 00:05:48,390 Eh. We never get to see our friends. Why should she? 143 00:05:48,390 --> 00:05:49,680 Let's do it. 144 00:05:51,520 --> 00:05:53,060 I think you're making a wonderful decision. 145 00:05:53,060 --> 00:05:54,480 Awww! 146 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:56,270 Well, the fact that you're on board makes me hate it, 147 00:05:56,270 --> 00:05:58,310 but we're still gonna do it. We're gonna do it. 148 00:05:58,310 --> 00:06:02,610 ♪♪ 149 00:06:02,610 --> 00:06:05,950 Wow. Ms. Molina, this place is gorgeous. 150 00:06:05,950 --> 00:06:07,910 The little desks and the little chairs. 151 00:06:07,910 --> 00:06:10,120 It's like a little school. 152 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:13,830 It is. It is a preschool. 153 00:06:14,910 --> 00:06:16,960 That is, without a doubt, 154 00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:18,960 the finest sandbox I have ever seen. 155 00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:20,170 Thank you. 156 00:06:20,170 --> 00:06:23,210 And, of course, we take safety very seriously. 157 00:06:23,210 --> 00:06:25,090 Obviously, this is a nut‐free zone. 158 00:06:25,090 --> 00:06:26,880 Oh, well, that might be a problem 159 00:06:26,880 --> 00:06:28,970 because Lulu is a bit of a nut. 160 00:06:28,970 --> 00:06:30,140 [ Laughs ] 161 00:06:31,390 --> 00:06:34,100 Nuts can kill some of our students. 162 00:06:34,100 --> 00:06:36,850 Yeah, Jo, come on. 163 00:06:36,850 --> 00:06:37,940 Excuse me. 164 00:06:37,940 --> 00:06:42,110 So, I hope... you know isn't intimidated. 165 00:06:42,110 --> 00:06:43,900 This is a big step. I know. I know. 166 00:06:43,900 --> 00:06:45,610 It's all kind of hitting me, you know? 167 00:06:45,610 --> 00:06:47,530 She's not a baby anymore, and, uh, 168 00:06:47,530 --> 00:06:49,700 we're not ‐‐ not having any more babies. 169 00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:50,910 Dear God, no. 170 00:06:50,910 --> 00:06:52,280 No. That's it. 171 00:06:52,280 --> 00:06:54,830 It's like... no more babies. 172 00:06:54,830 --> 00:06:56,620 [ Voice breaking ] I love babies. 173 00:06:56,620 --> 00:06:58,920 Ooh. Sorry. 174 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:04,090 Well, you're in the system now, Lulu. 175 00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:05,090 It's over. 176 00:07:05,090 --> 00:07:06,800 Good luck. 177 00:07:10,010 --> 00:07:14,180 Lulu...I know this place is big and scary, 178 00:07:14,180 --> 00:07:15,520 but you know what? 179 00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:17,730 In a few days, you're gonna make some friends and ‐‐ 180 00:07:17,730 --> 00:07:18,980 Bye! 181 00:07:18,980 --> 00:07:20,980 [ Screams ] 182 00:07:22,770 --> 00:07:24,650 That bitch. 183 00:07:26,860 --> 00:07:29,200 Doesn't she know how emotionally fragile we are right now? 184 00:07:30,490 --> 00:07:31,490 [ Sighs ] 185 00:07:31,490 --> 00:07:33,200 So, now what? 186 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:37,160 Well, now we walk Emily next door to her school, 187 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:38,710 and we have 45 minutes until work starts, 188 00:07:38,710 --> 00:07:40,500 so maybe we have a... 189 00:07:40,500 --> 00:07:41,830 [ Gasps ] 190 00:07:41,830 --> 00:07:44,380 [ Techno music plays ] Car party! 191 00:07:46,460 --> 00:07:47,460 [ Music stops ] 192 00:07:47,460 --> 00:07:49,300 I have been staring at my phone 193 00:07:49,300 --> 00:07:51,430 for eight solid minutes without anyone interrupting. 194 00:07:51,430 --> 00:07:52,970 [ Chuckles ] 195 00:07:52,970 --> 00:07:54,810 Hey, did you know that we had a new President? 196 00:07:56,180 --> 00:07:58,730 Reaction... is real mixed. 197 00:08:00,810 --> 00:08:03,980 I cannot wait to waste this time every day! 198 00:08:03,980 --> 00:08:06,110 I'm not gonna do anything responsible. 199 00:08:07,740 --> 00:08:09,700 Uhp! Score. Half‐eaten baggie of Goldfish. 200 00:08:09,700 --> 00:08:11,110 Ooh, gimme! 201 00:08:11,110 --> 00:08:12,820 Mmm! 202 00:08:12,820 --> 00:08:14,030 Ohh! 203 00:08:14,030 --> 00:08:15,160 Mm. Here, catch. Oh. 204 00:08:15,160 --> 00:08:17,330 There we go. 205 00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:20,000 This is our best date ever. 206 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,790 Oh, God. That's sad. 207 00:08:21,790 --> 00:08:23,000 No, this is amazing. 208 00:08:25,500 --> 00:08:26,920 [ Cellphone vibrates ] 209 00:08:26,920 --> 00:08:29,470 Oh. It's the preschool. 210 00:08:29,470 --> 00:08:30,720 Hello? 211 00:08:32,550 --> 00:08:34,010 Okay. 212 00:08:35,100 --> 00:08:36,390 Okay. 213 00:08:36,390 --> 00:08:38,140 What's happening? Shh! 214 00:08:38,140 --> 00:08:39,600 Okay, thank you. We will be right in. 215 00:08:39,600 --> 00:08:41,310 Thank you. What happened? 216 00:08:41,310 --> 00:08:44,060 Lulu bit Casper. 217 00:08:48,190 --> 00:08:50,150 So... 218 00:08:50,150 --> 00:08:52,700 Casper is a child? 219 00:08:54,110 --> 00:08:57,330 Someone chose to name their child...Casper? 220 00:08:58,910 --> 00:09:01,370 Guessing you've heard all the "friendly ghost" jokes ‐‐ I've heard them. 221 00:09:01,370 --> 00:09:03,870 I mean, they're kids. 222 00:09:03,870 --> 00:09:05,790 Biting's a thing that happens, right? 223 00:09:05,790 --> 00:09:07,840 It's not that big a deal. 224 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:10,050 Mommy! 225 00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:11,130 Oh, my God! 226 00:09:12,680 --> 00:09:15,050 We're also learning about cherries. 227 00:09:15,050 --> 00:09:16,300 [ Gasps ] Oh. [ Sighing ] Okay. 228 00:09:19,390 --> 00:09:22,980 ♪♪ 229 00:09:22,980 --> 00:09:24,940 [ Keys clatter ] 230 00:09:24,940 --> 00:09:26,940 Oh, good. You're home. 231 00:09:26,940 --> 00:09:29,820 Doesn't this look exactly like me? 232 00:09:33,030 --> 00:09:34,240 Bill: Ohh. 233 00:09:36,030 --> 00:09:39,160 Hitting the wine a little early tonight, huh? 234 00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:41,700 I'm telling you, we're Italian. 235 00:09:41,700 --> 00:09:44,000 That explains why I love pasta. 236 00:09:45,580 --> 00:09:48,340 Definitely explains why I love penne. 237 00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:54,170 Because I told you last night that "penne" means ‐‐ 238 00:09:54,170 --> 00:09:57,260 ‐Yeah, yeah, we got it! ‐Would you stop talking, please? 239 00:09:57,260 --> 00:09:58,970 ...penis. [ Thud ] 240 00:10:00,510 --> 00:10:02,770 How was Lulu's first day? 241 00:10:02,770 --> 00:10:05,440 Oh, it was amazing. It was really, really great. So good! [ Laughs ] 242 00:10:07,060 --> 00:10:08,520 We're not gonna tell her about the biting, right? 243 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:10,570 Oh, never. Her or Chuy. 244 00:10:10,570 --> 00:10:12,190 Sandy: Oh, my God! 245 00:10:12,190 --> 00:10:15,240 Hopefully, that just means we're related to Pacino or something. 246 00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:18,280 I just found this in Lulu's bag. 247 00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:22,080 It says she's a‐a... a biter? 248 00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:24,080 "Incident report"? 249 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:25,580 Well, the school already told us. 250 00:10:25,580 --> 00:10:27,170 They also have to write her up? 251 00:10:27,170 --> 00:10:29,590 This thing is eight pages long! 252 00:10:29,590 --> 00:10:31,880 There's recommended reading? 253 00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:33,960 How did we end up with homework? 254 00:10:33,960 --> 00:10:37,010 They never did this kind of thing at Emily's preschool. 255 00:10:37,010 --> 00:10:38,640 Yeah, the only time they ever called us 256 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:40,140 was when our check bounced. 257 00:10:40,140 --> 00:10:43,520 The pictures from the security cameras are very disturbing. 258 00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:45,850 Lulu looks up at the camera and laughs. 259 00:10:47,310 --> 00:10:50,610 I think she bit Casper for a thrill. 260 00:10:50,610 --> 00:10:52,570 Mom, kids bite, okay? It's fine. 261 00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:54,860 Well, you did have 262 00:10:54,860 --> 00:10:56,610 that "rubbing yourself against blocks" incident 263 00:10:56,610 --> 00:10:58,110 in the first grade. 264 00:10:58,110 --> 00:10:58,740 Mom! 265 00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:02,370 What? 266 00:11:03,330 --> 00:11:05,700 No, I‐I...I was... 267 00:11:05,700 --> 00:11:08,870 cleaning them on my pants. 268 00:11:11,960 --> 00:11:13,960 You know, your dad was a biter. 269 00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:16,260 Not that I didn't enjoy it from time to time ‐‐ 270 00:11:16,260 --> 00:11:17,670 Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! 271 00:11:17,670 --> 00:11:19,970 A biter? A biter?! 272 00:11:19,970 --> 00:11:21,180 How do you know? 273 00:11:21,180 --> 00:11:23,140 I'm on the board. I get every incident report. 274 00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:24,890 Why? 275 00:11:24,890 --> 00:11:27,560 [ Sighs ] This needs to be handled. 276 00:11:27,560 --> 00:11:29,060 Okay. 277 00:11:29,060 --> 00:11:31,060 Okay, uh...Lulu doesn't have our last name. 278 00:11:31,060 --> 00:11:32,860 She has Bill's last name, so that's good. 279 00:11:32,860 --> 00:11:35,280 Um, I can call in some favors. 280 00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:37,440 We can steal the footage. 281 00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:40,280 And we need to go on the attack. 282 00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:42,830 We are gonna destroy Casper. 283 00:11:42,830 --> 00:11:45,740 I was thinking exactly the same thing. 284 00:11:45,740 --> 00:11:47,580 Oh, you are as wise as you are beautiful. 285 00:11:47,580 --> 00:11:49,500 Oh, Chuy. 286 00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:51,920 Can we have a snack? 287 00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,290 Okay. 288 00:11:53,290 --> 00:11:55,670 Could you two give us a sec so we could talk to Lulu? 289 00:11:57,970 --> 00:12:00,010 Or...just stay right there. Whatever. 290 00:12:01,510 --> 00:12:03,140 Hey, Lulu? 291 00:12:03,140 --> 00:12:06,430 Today you did something that was...not okay. 292 00:12:09,640 --> 00:12:11,940 I don't think that really sunk in. 293 00:12:11,940 --> 00:12:13,900 Mom, please? 294 00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:17,940 Lulu, you bit Casper, and that's a no‐no. 295 00:12:17,940 --> 00:12:18,860 Okay? 296 00:12:18,860 --> 00:12:20,700 We don't bite, okay? 297 00:12:21,990 --> 00:12:23,200 Look. 298 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:24,240 Rrrrnh! 299 00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:25,330 No. 300 00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:27,240 Rrrrnh! 301 00:12:27,240 --> 00:12:29,710 That's a no. 302 00:12:29,710 --> 00:12:30,960 Blapo do. 303 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:33,790 "Blapo do" means "okay." 304 00:12:33,790 --> 00:12:36,300 Blah‐bleep dookey do. 305 00:12:36,300 --> 00:12:37,960 Blah‐bleep dookey do. 306 00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:39,050 She's got it. 307 00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:42,550 Bah‐bleep do‐do‐do. 308 00:12:42,550 --> 00:12:43,840 [ Laughs ] 309 00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:45,890 What ‐‐ What does that mean? 310 00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:47,720 It's a sick burn. 311 00:12:55,190 --> 00:12:56,770 So, that's handled. 312 00:12:56,770 --> 00:13:01,240 ♪♪ 313 00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:02,950 Hey, Ms. Molina. 314 00:13:02,950 --> 00:13:04,820 Thank you so much for the incident report. 315 00:13:04,820 --> 00:13:07,830 We did all the recommended reading. 316 00:13:07,830 --> 00:13:10,120 Supes interesting. [ Chuckles ] 317 00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:11,910 I actually tapped out around 2:00 a. m., 318 00:13:11,910 --> 00:13:15,500 but I get the gist ‐‐ biting bad. 319 00:13:15,500 --> 00:13:16,540 Great. 320 00:13:16,540 --> 00:13:18,960 And obviously, Lulu is new. 321 00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:20,880 It's normal to have bumps in the road. 322 00:13:20,880 --> 00:13:23,300 Thank you so much for understanding. 323 00:13:23,300 --> 00:13:25,390 Just let us know if there's anything else you need from us. 324 00:13:25,390 --> 00:13:27,470 Alright. Wait. 325 00:13:27,470 --> 00:13:29,470 Where are you going? 326 00:13:29,470 --> 00:13:30,850 To work. To work. 327 00:13:30,850 --> 00:13:32,680 To stop biting behavior, 328 00:13:32,680 --> 00:13:34,730 you need to catch it in action and redirect it. 329 00:13:34,730 --> 00:13:35,940 [ Inhales sharply ] 330 00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,150 Well, good luck catching it. 331 00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:38,690 And redirecting it. 332 00:13:38,690 --> 00:13:42,690 And the parents need to do the observing and redirecting 333 00:13:42,690 --> 00:13:44,780 for it to be most effective. 334 00:13:44,780 --> 00:13:46,450 This was all in the recommended reading. 335 00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:47,530 It was? 336 00:13:47,530 --> 00:13:50,040 Yeah, Bill. [ Scoffs ] 337 00:13:50,040 --> 00:13:52,040 Let me get this straight ‐‐ instead of going to work, 338 00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:55,040 you want us to... stay here and watch our kid? 339 00:13:55,040 --> 00:13:59,090 At the place we thought we were paying to watch our kid? 340 00:13:59,090 --> 00:14:00,800 Thank you! 341 00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:04,720 ♪♪ 342 00:14:07,300 --> 00:14:09,640 [ Kids screaming ] 343 00:14:11,260 --> 00:14:13,270 Hey. How'd the first shift go? 344 00:14:13,270 --> 00:14:15,520 It was the world's most boring stakeout. 345 00:14:15,520 --> 00:14:17,940 Four hours of absolutely nothing. 346 00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,900 Although, a good portion of that was a nap. 347 00:14:19,900 --> 00:14:21,230 Oh, so, the kids napped already? 348 00:14:22,440 --> 00:14:24,900 Sure. Yeah. Let's say it was them. 349 00:14:24,900 --> 00:14:26,820 Babe, I can't believe this is happening. 350 00:14:26,820 --> 00:14:28,530 You know, Emily was supposed to be the weird one 351 00:14:28,530 --> 00:14:29,620 and Lulu was easy. 352 00:14:29,620 --> 00:14:31,080 I know. 353 00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:33,540 Now the easy one is the... psycho one 354 00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:35,080 and the weird one is... 355 00:14:35,080 --> 00:14:36,790 well, still the weird one. 356 00:14:38,170 --> 00:14:39,710 Ms. Molina: Lulu! 357 00:14:39,710 --> 00:14:41,380 Maybe there's two Lulus? 358 00:14:43,130 --> 00:14:45,670 There has been a second, more disturbing incident. 359 00:14:48,890 --> 00:14:52,430 So, she killed someone or...? 360 00:14:52,430 --> 00:14:54,100 ♪♪ 361 00:14:57,180 --> 00:14:58,520 Lulu kissed Casper. 362 00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:04,780 My son was kissed! 363 00:15:04,780 --> 00:15:06,110 Kissed. 364 00:15:07,570 --> 00:15:10,620 These are Casper's parents, Kendra and Casper Senior. 365 00:15:10,620 --> 00:15:11,530 [ Snorts ] [ Laughs ] 366 00:15:11,530 --> 00:15:13,200 [ Coughs ] 367 00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:14,490 [ Grunts ] 368 00:15:17,370 --> 00:15:20,830 They have asked to have a dialogue. 369 00:15:20,830 --> 00:15:23,290 Last night, Casper was so upset, 370 00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:25,340 he couldn't even eat his vegetables. 371 00:15:25,340 --> 00:15:28,970 Yeah, that sounds unrelated. 372 00:15:28,970 --> 00:15:30,430 He's vegan. 373 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:31,890 He's literally starving. 374 00:15:31,890 --> 00:15:33,430 Was probably starving before. 375 00:15:33,430 --> 00:15:34,220 Hello. 376 00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:38,230 They're just children. I mean, come on. 377 00:15:38,230 --> 00:15:40,100 Haven't you guys been through this with your other kids? 378 00:15:40,100 --> 00:15:42,860 Um, we care about the environment, 379 00:15:42,860 --> 00:15:44,980 so Casper is our only child, and ‐‐ 380 00:15:44,980 --> 00:15:47,650 Ohhh! Ohhh! 381 00:15:47,650 --> 00:15:48,990 So ‐‐ Okay ‐‐ 382 00:15:48,990 --> 00:15:51,530 So, you guys don't know anything? Okay. 383 00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:54,330 I'm sorry? 384 00:15:54,330 --> 00:15:58,040 Eh, it's alright. No need to apologize. 385 00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:00,870 Look, why don't we just keep Casper and Lulu 386 00:16:00,870 --> 00:16:02,630 away from each other, okay? 387 00:16:02,630 --> 00:16:07,380 Well, not okay, because Lulu is Casper's only friend. 388 00:16:07,380 --> 00:16:09,050 What is happening? 389 00:16:10,380 --> 00:16:13,010 It's the process. 390 00:16:13,010 --> 00:16:15,930 We'd like to engage in regular mediation sessions, 391 00:16:15,930 --> 00:16:17,220 and in a few months, when we finish ‐‐ 392 00:16:17,220 --> 00:16:19,480 Months? Whoa, whoa. 393 00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:22,100 We can't do that. We work. 394 00:16:22,100 --> 00:16:24,020 Have you heard of that? Work? 395 00:16:24,020 --> 00:16:26,110 Yes. We've heard of that. 396 00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:27,860 [ Chuckles ] 397 00:16:27,860 --> 00:16:29,900 Then why don't you have to do it? 398 00:16:29,900 --> 00:16:32,240 My great‐grandfather invented straws. 399 00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:36,410 And I married him. 400 00:16:38,370 --> 00:16:41,160 Okay, that does seem like a lot of work, actually. 401 00:16:42,370 --> 00:16:44,460 Let's keep the focus on the children. 402 00:16:44,460 --> 00:16:47,960 Here's what happened ‐‐ Lulu had Magna‐Tiles. 403 00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:49,880 Casper wanted them, he tried to take them, 404 00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:51,550 so she bit him. 405 00:16:51,550 --> 00:16:53,050 She was just protecting herself. 406 00:16:53,050 --> 00:16:55,090 Au contraire! 407 00:16:57,260 --> 00:17:02,100 Lulu aggressively invaded Casper's space by kissing him. 408 00:17:02,100 --> 00:17:05,230 If she was a CEO, she would be fired. 409 00:17:05,230 --> 00:17:07,230 Maybe not. 410 00:17:07,230 --> 00:17:09,780 No, no, no, no. That's up to the shareholders. 411 00:17:14,030 --> 00:17:16,870 Will you listen to us? We all sound stupid! 412 00:17:16,870 --> 00:17:21,330 Often, the process does not... 413 00:17:21,330 --> 00:17:22,830 sound smart. 414 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,920 Look, all kids are psycho, okay? 415 00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:30,090 I took the day off to learn that... 416 00:17:30,090 --> 00:17:32,840 Roberto eats sand, Julia picks her nose, 417 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:35,550 Felix cleans the blocks on his pants. 418 00:17:39,430 --> 00:17:40,720 You know what? I'm sorry. 419 00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:42,890 I‐I should be at work. Okay? 420 00:17:42,890 --> 00:17:44,770 I don't believe we've finished. 421 00:17:44,770 --> 00:17:47,980 Uh, I'm sorry, but all we want from preschool 422 00:17:47,980 --> 00:17:50,110 is to drop our kid off and pick her up. 423 00:17:50,110 --> 00:17:51,860 Right, and we ask, "How was school?" and she says, "Good," 424 00:17:51,860 --> 00:17:52,940 and that's it. 425 00:17:52,940 --> 00:17:54,570 Yeah, and then ‐‐ and then we're ‐‐ 426 00:17:54,570 --> 00:17:56,530 we're like, "Oh, come on, something must have happened." 427 00:17:56,530 --> 00:17:58,530 And she's like, "Why do you guys need to know everything? 428 00:17:58,530 --> 00:18:00,330 Get off my back!" You know what I mean? 429 00:18:00,330 --> 00:18:02,080 Yeah, and then ‐‐ and then she, like, storms up to her room, 430 00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:03,580 and we're like, "What the hell's her problem?" 431 00:18:03,580 --> 00:18:05,580 And then we don't know what to do, so we say something like, 432 00:18:05,580 --> 00:18:07,000 "Hey! No vaping!" 433 00:18:09,090 --> 00:18:10,670 That's it! Okay? 434 00:18:10,670 --> 00:18:13,170 We just want 12 years of that! 435 00:18:13,170 --> 00:18:14,720 Normal stuff! 436 00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:15,720 Right, normal. Okay? 437 00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:16,930 Normal! You know, just normal. 438 00:18:16,930 --> 00:18:18,050 Normal! You know, like a normal life, 439 00:18:18,050 --> 00:18:19,220 like normal people would ‐‐ Normal!! 440 00:18:19,220 --> 00:18:21,600 ‐You know, normal ‐‐ ‐Hey, hey, hey, hey. 441 00:18:24,060 --> 00:18:25,810 Can I see you in the time‐out tent? 442 00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:29,440 [ Whispering ] You're in trouble. 443 00:18:32,690 --> 00:18:36,150 ♪♪ 444 00:18:36,150 --> 00:18:38,360 Thank. You. For. That. 445 00:18:39,870 --> 00:18:40,910 What? 446 00:18:42,370 --> 00:18:44,160 So, we're not in trouble? 447 00:18:44,160 --> 00:18:46,330 Because that little rat with the mustache 448 00:18:46,330 --> 00:18:47,920 said we were in trouble. 449 00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:49,830 The parents get worse every year. 450 00:18:49,830 --> 00:18:52,000 Biting is totally age‐appropriate. 451 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:55,010 But these parents get way too involved in their kids' lives. 452 00:18:55,010 --> 00:18:58,010 Ah, well, you never have to worry about that with us. 453 00:18:58,010 --> 00:19:00,050 Get out of here and go to work. 454 00:19:00,050 --> 00:19:02,010 We don't need to talk for the rest of the year. 455 00:19:02,010 --> 00:19:04,020 [ Gasps ] Really? 456 00:19:04,020 --> 00:19:06,810 Yeah. I like kids. 457 00:19:06,810 --> 00:19:08,810 But I hate parents. 458 00:19:08,810 --> 00:19:10,440 No offense. 459 00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:11,650 Are you kidding? 460 00:19:11,650 --> 00:19:14,320 We hate parents, too! 461 00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,320 I was so worried because you're Chuy's sister. 462 00:19:16,320 --> 00:19:17,740 He is... 463 00:19:17,740 --> 00:19:19,660 Oh, yeah, he is. 464 00:19:19,660 --> 00:19:21,530 And I've got nine brothers. 465 00:19:21,530 --> 00:19:23,080 He's the best one. 466 00:19:24,490 --> 00:19:28,000 He always makes us feel bad 'cause his kids are perfect. 467 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,540 Perfect? Ha. 468 00:19:29,540 --> 00:19:31,170 One of them used to poop in the cubby. 469 00:19:33,290 --> 00:19:36,210 We are gonna be best friends. 470 00:19:36,210 --> 00:19:38,050 Anyway, will you do me a favor 471 00:19:38,050 --> 00:19:40,470 and look really upset when we leave the tent? 472 00:19:40,470 --> 00:19:41,640 Oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 473 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:43,050 I'm a good fake crier. 474 00:19:43,050 --> 00:19:44,600 Fake? 475 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:45,720 [ Chuckling ] Okay. 476 00:19:57,110 --> 00:19:59,200 We got reamed. 477 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:01,410 Yeah, we learned a big lesson today. 478 00:20:03,950 --> 00:20:05,790 [ Whispering ] We didn't learn a lesson at all. 479 00:20:05,790 --> 00:20:07,370 ♪♪ 480 00:20:11,580 --> 00:20:12,790 Well, the biter's down. 481 00:20:14,580 --> 00:20:16,670 What about the weirdo? 482 00:20:16,670 --> 00:20:17,840 She wouldn't brush her teeth, 483 00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:19,630 and then she drew a spider on her face. 484 00:20:21,420 --> 00:20:22,470 Eh, we'll wash it off in the morning. 485 00:20:22,470 --> 00:20:23,640 With a Sharpie. 486 00:20:26,260 --> 00:20:28,310 Does it look cool? 487 00:20:28,310 --> 00:20:29,470 Nope. 488 00:20:33,810 --> 00:20:35,940 I have terrible news. 489 00:20:37,190 --> 00:20:38,440 Uh‐oh. What happened? 490 00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:39,820 We're not Italian. 491 00:20:41,490 --> 00:20:42,950 We're Dutch! 492 00:20:44,910 --> 00:20:46,910 I'm‐a so sad! 493 00:20:46,910 --> 00:20:48,370 Ohhh! 494 00:20:48,370 --> 00:20:49,660 Ohh! 495 00:20:49,660 --> 00:20:51,500 [ Sobbing ] 496 00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:52,540 Mom, you're crushing my penne. 497 00:20:52,540 --> 00:20:54,370 Oh! I'm so ‐‐ 498 00:20:54,370 --> 00:20:58,000 ♪♪ 499 00:20:58,000 --> 00:20:59,500 Yeah!