1 00:00:05,213 --> 00:00:07,841 [epic holiday music] 2 00:00:08,299 --> 00:00:11,344 * 3 00:00:11,511 --> 00:00:14,305 - Man, I really love 4 00:00:11,511 --> 00:00:14,305 the Grinch. 5 00:00:14,472 --> 00:00:16,160 I mean, that dog 6 00:00:14,472 --> 00:00:16,160 is definitely in bondage, 7 00:00:16,181 --> 00:00:17,767 but it was a different time 8 00:00:17,934 --> 00:00:19,728 - Hey, y'all can be cool 9 00:00:17,934 --> 00:00:19,728 with that dude if you want to, 10 00:00:19,894 --> 00:00:21,730 but if he try to steal 11 00:00:19,894 --> 00:00:21,730 my Who hash, 12 00:00:21,896 --> 00:00:23,940 I go straight 13 00:00:21,896 --> 00:00:23,940 to the lockbox on him. 14 00:00:24,107 --> 00:00:27,569 Get thing one 15 00:00:24,107 --> 00:00:27,569 and thing two in that ass. 16 00:00:27,736 --> 00:00:29,487 - Daddy, what is uncle Gary 17 00:00:27,736 --> 00:00:29,487 talking about? 18 00:00:29,612 --> 00:00:31,656 - Nothing. 19 00:00:29,612 --> 00:00:31,656 He's just being silly. 20 00:00:31,823 --> 00:00:34,617 He definitely does not have 21 00:00:31,823 --> 00:00:34,617 a firearm in my house. 22 00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:37,120 - No. 23 00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:37,120 - Well... [sighs] 24 00:00:37,245 --> 00:00:38,747 I think it's bedtime. 25 00:00:38,913 --> 00:00:40,623 - Aw. Already? 26 00:00:40,790 --> 00:00:43,335 - Actually, I was talking 27 00:00:40,790 --> 00:00:43,335 about Papa Rick. 28 00:00:43,501 --> 00:00:45,587 I had three real hard eggnogs 29 00:00:45,754 --> 00:00:47,297 - But I do think it's time 30 00:00:45,754 --> 00:00:47,297 for the two of you 31 00:00:47,422 --> 00:00:49,549 to take yourselves 32 00:00:47,422 --> 00:00:49,549 to bed as well. 33 00:00:49,716 --> 00:00:51,301 Tomorrow is family 34 00:00:49,716 --> 00:00:51,301 Christmas Day 35 00:00:51,468 --> 00:00:52,927 - Doesn't Santa get upset 36 00:00:53,530 --> 00:00:55,960 that we open our presents 37 00:00:53,530 --> 00:00:55,960 a day early every year? 38 00:00:55,263 --> 00:00:57,182 - Santa knows that come 39 00:00:55,263 --> 00:00:57,182 Christmas morning, 40 00:00:57,349 --> 00:00:59,601 I have to be in the studio 41 00:00:57,349 --> 00:00:59,601 to do our holiday spectacular, 42 00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:00,935 and he'll bring you presents 43 00:01:01,102 --> 00:01:02,854 for you to find 44 00:01:01,102 --> 00:01:02,854 when you get home. 45 00:01:03,210 --> 00:01:05,522 - Come on, ladies, let's see 46 00:01:03,210 --> 00:01:05,522 how many Christmas stories 47 00:01:05,648 --> 00:01:07,317 I can get through 48 00:01:05,648 --> 00:01:07,317 before I blackout 49 00:01:07,484 --> 00:01:08,943 - Good night. 50 00:01:07,484 --> 00:01:08,943 - Good night. 51 00:01:09,110 --> 00:01:10,820 - Good night. 52 00:01:10,987 --> 00:01:12,947 - I hate Grandma stories. 53 00:01:13,730 --> 00:01:14,157 - You ready? 54 00:01:14,282 --> 00:01:15,825 - You already know, dog. 55 00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:19,704 - * Hey, the kids sleep? 56 00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:19,704 - * Yeah 57 00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:21,331 - * Put their presents 58 00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:21,331 under the tree * 59 00:01:21,456 --> 00:01:23,333 * My baby's name is on it, 60 00:01:21,456 --> 00:01:23,333 with how it is wrapped * 61 00:01:23,458 --> 00:01:25,293 * She'll know it's me 62 00:01:23,458 --> 00:01:25,293 because it is crappy * 63 00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:27,462 * But once you get past that, 64 00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:27,462 you'll be so happy * 65 00:01:27,629 --> 00:01:30,548 * 'Cause I got everything on 66 00:01:27,629 --> 00:01:30,548 your list, ain't miss a lick * 67 00:01:30,715 --> 00:01:32,175 - * It's Christmastime 68 00:01:30,715 --> 00:01:32,175 in the A * 69 00:01:32,342 --> 00:01:34,940 * Yeah, it's late 70 00:01:32,342 --> 00:01:34,940 but we ain't tired * 71 00:01:34,259 --> 00:01:36,846 * Still got to wrap the bikes 72 00:01:34,259 --> 00:01:36,846 with some assembly required * 73 00:01:37,130 --> 00:01:38,223 - * Eating cookies 74 00:01:37,130 --> 00:01:38,223 off the plate * 75 00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:40,140 * Then replace 'em 76 00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:40,140 just for Santa * 77 00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:42,936 * Got 12 reindeer with all 78 00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:42,936 their names on my pajamas * 79 00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:44,437 - * Christmas morning 80 00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:44,437 in the streets on bikes * 81 00:01:44,562 --> 00:01:46,398 * Full of glee 82 00:01:46,523 --> 00:01:49,984 * Standing up while we ride 83 00:01:46,523 --> 00:01:49,984 with our butts off the seat * 84 00:01:50,151 --> 00:01:53,113 - Oh! [bleep]! 85 00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:55,573 Hey, bro. You good? 86 00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:55,573 - No. 87 00:01:55,699 --> 00:01:57,241 - * Been lighting up the A 88 00:01:57,366 --> 00:01:59,202 - * Since we was adolescents 89 00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:00,662 * I'm drinking 90 00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:00,662 and spilling milk * 91 00:02:00,829 --> 00:02:02,380 * On the whole gang 92 00:02:00,829 --> 00:02:02,380 of presents * 93 00:02:02,205 --> 00:02:03,748 - * Cherish 94 00:02:02,205 --> 00:02:03,748 the ones you love * 95 00:02:03,915 --> 00:02:04,874 * Let them know 96 00:02:03,915 --> 00:02:04,874 that they're your favorite * 97 00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:08,169 * Sipping eggnog while I'm 98 00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:08,169 watching "Trading Places"... * 99 00:02:08,336 --> 00:02:10,922 - * Elf on the shelf, 100 00:02:08,336 --> 00:02:10,922 lift you up if you need help * 101 00:02:11,890 --> 00:02:12,674 * Pass the myrrh 102 00:02:11,890 --> 00:02:12,674 - * Deck the halls 103 00:02:12,841 --> 00:02:15,593 - * Merry Christmas 104 00:02:12,841 --> 00:02:15,593 to you all * 105 00:02:15,719 --> 00:02:19,140 * Merry Christmas to you all 106 00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:20,765 * Merry Christmas 107 00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:20,765 from the South * 108 00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:25,186 * 109 00:02:25,311 --> 00:02:30,660 - * Merry Christmas 110 00:02:30,233 --> 00:02:37,281 * 111 00:02:37,449 --> 00:02:42,162 * Merry Christmas 112 00:02:42,287 --> 00:02:45,790 * 113 00:02:45,957 --> 00:02:47,375 [cheers and applause] 114 00:02:45,957 --> 00:02:47,375 - Thank you, family. Thank you. 115 00:02:47,542 --> 00:02:49,293 I appreciate you 116 00:02:47,542 --> 00:02:49,293 all very much 117 00:02:49,461 --> 00:02:52,964 * 118 00:02:53,131 --> 00:02:54,900 - * Merry Christmas 119 00:02:53,131 --> 00:02:54,900 to you all * 120 00:02:54,257 --> 00:02:57,677 - Whoo! Williams brothers 121 00:02:54,257 --> 00:02:57,677 take down another Christmas. 122 00:02:57,802 --> 00:03:00,550 - And Rick. 123 00:02:57,802 --> 00:03:00,550 - Man, all you did was drink. 124 00:03:00,221 --> 00:03:03,308 - Hey, you got your 125 00:03:00,221 --> 00:03:03,308 family traditions, I got mine. 126 00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:04,726 [cell phone vibrates] 127 00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:04,726 - Well, speaking of traditions, 128 00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:07,228 tomorrow I'm going to need you 129 00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:07,228 to stay sober 130 00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:09,105 so you can watch your 131 00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:09,105 granddaughters at the studio, 132 00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:11,608 while Gary and I make 133 00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:11,608 the little children of Atlanta 134 00:03:11,775 --> 00:03:14,611 happy playing Santa 135 00:03:11,775 --> 00:03:14,611 and his trusty elf. 136 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:17,197 - Oh, hold up, man. I can't do 137 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:17,197 the elf thing anymore. 138 00:03:17,364 --> 00:03:19,157 - What? What you talking 139 00:03:17,364 --> 00:03:19,157 about man? 140 00:03:19,324 --> 00:03:20,784 You can't miss out 141 00:03:20,950 --> 00:03:22,827 on the Annual Wake Up 142 00:03:20,950 --> 00:03:22,827 with Kenan Holiday Spectacular. 143 00:03:22,994 --> 00:03:25,121 The community is counting 144 00:03:22,994 --> 00:03:25,121 on the Williams brothers. 145 00:03:25,288 --> 00:03:28,583 - I know, man, but I think 146 00:03:25,288 --> 00:03:28,583 I might sign a new client. 147 00:03:28,708 --> 00:03:30,430 - Whoa. That's huge. 148 00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:31,544 - Right? 149 00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:33,922 - Wait, wait, wait, 150 00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:33,922 wait, what new client? 151 00:03:34,890 --> 00:03:35,757 - Oh, this hilarious comedian 152 00:03:34,890 --> 00:03:35,757 I met in LA 153 00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:37,634 when you dragged 154 00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:37,634 your whole family out there 155 00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:39,469 to shoot the reboot 156 00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:39,469 for your old sitcom. 157 00:03:39,594 --> 00:03:43,305 - The train wreck of a reboot. 158 00:03:39,594 --> 00:03:43,305 What a waste of three months. 159 00:03:43,473 --> 00:03:47,310 And whose idea was it to cast 160 00:03:43,473 --> 00:03:47,310 you as Katt Williams' father? 161 00:03:47,435 --> 00:03:49,103 - We took a big swing. 162 00:03:47,435 --> 00:03:49,103 - I'll say. 163 00:03:49,270 --> 00:03:51,690 - Look, Shaunda is only in town 164 00:03:49,270 --> 00:03:51,690 for Christmas Day, 165 00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:53,316 and she chose to spend it 166 00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:53,316 with me 167 00:03:53,441 --> 00:03:54,901 mostly because 168 00:03:53,441 --> 00:03:54,901 she hates her mama. 169 00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:56,778 But still, 170 00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:56,778 Merry Christmas, Gary. 171 00:03:56,903 --> 00:03:58,655 - So what? You just going 172 00:03:56,903 --> 00:03:58,655 to abandon your family? 173 00:03:58,822 --> 00:04:01,408 - Look, come on, man, 174 00:03:58,822 --> 00:04:01,408 this could be the first client 175 00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:03,576 I have that 176 00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:03,576 I haven't taken a bath with. 177 00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:05,360 - There's an image 178 00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:05,360 I didn't need. 179 00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:07,372 - You know what? 180 00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:07,372 Hey, I'm excited for you. 181 00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:08,498 - Thank you. 182 00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:08,498 - But I don't know. 183 00:04:10,208 --> 00:04:11,876 I feel like you might be taking 184 00:04:10,208 --> 00:04:11,876 on a little too much, you know? 185 00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:13,837 Like, you already 186 00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:13,837 bailing on me, 187 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:16,423 and you haven't even signed 188 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:16,423 your second client yet. 189 00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:20,802 - You know what? 190 00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:20,802 Okay. All right. You right. 191 00:04:20,969 --> 00:04:22,637 It's not fair to abandon 192 00:04:20,969 --> 00:04:22,637 you like that, man. 193 00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:24,305 I take care of it, all right? 194 00:04:24,431 --> 00:04:26,516 - Uh, just out of curiosity, 195 00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:28,643 how old were y'all 196 00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:28,643 when he took them baths? 197 00:04:28,810 --> 00:04:30,979 - 12 and 10, 198 00:04:28,810 --> 00:04:30,979 but he had a wild imagination. 199 00:04:31,146 --> 00:04:32,731 He used to think that sharks 200 00:04:31,146 --> 00:04:32,731 are gonna come up 201 00:04:32,897 --> 00:04:34,524 through the pipes 202 00:04:32,897 --> 00:04:34,524 and bite them on the pee-pee. 203 00:04:34,649 --> 00:04:36,651 - Another image I didn't need. 204 00:04:39,700 --> 00:04:41,281 - And this year's holiday 205 00:04:39,700 --> 00:04:41,281 spectacular is gonna be 206 00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:42,907 even bigger than last year's. 207 00:04:43,740 --> 00:04:44,826 We're gonna broadcast 208 00:04:43,740 --> 00:04:44,826 for seven hours straight. 209 00:04:44,993 --> 00:04:46,703 We're gonna have activities 210 00:04:44,993 --> 00:04:46,703 and performances 211 00:04:46,828 --> 00:04:48,163 for the community to enjoy 212 00:04:48,329 --> 00:04:51,666 and a huge holiday toy drive 213 00:04:48,329 --> 00:04:51,666 for the kids. 214 00:04:51,832 --> 00:04:53,626 - Oh, I brought something 215 00:04:51,832 --> 00:04:53,626 for the kids. 216 00:04:53,793 --> 00:04:56,546 - Oh. 217 00:04:53,793 --> 00:04:56,546 - Say hello to Pam Chop. 218 00:04:56,713 --> 00:04:58,423 [laughter] 219 00:04:58,548 --> 00:05:00,925 Her mouth 220 00:04:58,548 --> 00:05:00,925 is as dirty as she is. 221 00:05:01,920 --> 00:05:03,762 Hey, kid. You ever wonder 222 00:05:01,920 --> 00:05:03,762 why your [bleep] 223 00:05:03,928 --> 00:05:05,513 is so close to your [bleep]? 224 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:08,183 [laughter] 225 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:08,183 - Okay. 226 00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:10,435 Pam, you said that if I took 227 00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:10,435 you off the sports desk, 228 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:12,620 I could trust you 229 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:12,620 to host this thing. 230 00:05:12,228 --> 00:05:14,640 - It's not my fault people 231 00:05:12,228 --> 00:05:14,640 want their Pam edgy. 232 00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:17,150 - Come on, Mika, 233 00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:17,150 you just got to believe 234 00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:21,363 that we're gonna kick butt and 235 00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:21,363 have a very Merry Christmas. 236 00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:23,740 Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho. 237 00:05:23,907 --> 00:05:25,784 - Uh-uh, Santa don't roll 238 00:05:23,907 --> 00:05:25,784 with that many hos. 239 00:05:25,950 --> 00:05:28,536 - Oh, yeah. No, the five hos 240 00:05:25,950 --> 00:05:28,536 is how I make it my own. 241 00:05:28,661 --> 00:05:30,997 Yeah, I believe in the industry 242 00:05:28,661 --> 00:05:30,997 we call it a "penta-ho" 243 00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:32,916 - Don't try me, Santa. 244 00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:32,916 Now, where's Gary? 245 00:05:33,830 --> 00:05:34,376 We finally got the blood 246 00:05:33,830 --> 00:05:34,376 out of his elf costume. 247 00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:36,252 - He'll be here. 248 00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:38,400 But remember, it's your 249 00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:38,400 responsibility to keep him safe 250 00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:39,547 from those 251 00:05:38,171 --> 00:05:39,547 little biters this year. 252 00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:42,884 - Yes, I am aware of my duties 253 00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:42,884 as executive producer, 254 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:45,110 which is basically 255 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:45,110 doing everything by myself 256 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:49,150 while you fools add extra hos 257 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:49,150 and making nasty socks talk. 258 00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:52,769 - [softly] Mika, I can't speak 259 00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:52,769 for them or myself really. 260 00:05:52,936 --> 00:05:55,105 I am resting my voice 261 00:05:52,936 --> 00:05:55,105 for the musical finale, 262 00:05:55,271 --> 00:05:57,232 but I won't let you down. 263 00:05:57,399 --> 00:06:00,680 - Thank you, Tami. 264 00:05:57,399 --> 00:06:00,680 Song is gonna be great. 265 00:06:00,235 --> 00:06:02,904 Phil, you ready 266 00:06:00,235 --> 00:06:02,904 to stroke those keys? 267 00:06:03,710 --> 00:06:04,239 - Thanks to my Zoom 268 00:06:03,710 --> 00:06:04,239 cooking class, 269 00:06:04,406 --> 00:06:06,408 I won't be stroking anything 270 00:06:04,406 --> 00:06:06,408 for a long time. 271 00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:08,827 - Well, if you need some help-- 272 00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:08,827 - Not a word, Pam Chop. 273 00:06:08,993 --> 00:06:11,913 Great. How am I going to find 274 00:06:08,993 --> 00:06:11,913 a keyboard player on Christmas? 275 00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:13,415 - My father-in-law could do it. 276 00:06:13,581 --> 00:06:15,830 I mean, he's already here 277 00:06:13,581 --> 00:06:15,830 watching the girls. 278 00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:17,430 - I thought he played the sax. 279 00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:17,430 - He plays it all-- 280 00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:20,505 bongos, congos, anything that 281 00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:20,505 leads to the horizontal mambo. 282 00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:22,841 - I thought I played 283 00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:22,841 a sax once. 284 00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:25,176 Turns out it was a [bleep] 285 00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:25,176 - Pam Chop! 286 00:06:25,343 --> 00:06:28,130 [holiday music] 287 00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:34,352 * 288 00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:36,813 - Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho. 289 00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:39,357 No. Six is too many. 290 00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:39,357 I heard it when I said. 291 00:06:39,524 --> 00:06:43,690 - I liked it. 292 00:06:39,524 --> 00:06:43,690 - Thank you, man. Uh, who this? 293 00:06:43,194 --> 00:06:45,280 - This is Jordan, 294 00:06:43,194 --> 00:06:45,280 your early Christmas present. 295 00:06:45,447 --> 00:06:47,532 - Cool. I mean, does he sing 296 00:06:45,447 --> 00:06:47,532 or make waffles? 297 00:06:47,657 --> 00:06:48,825 'Cause 298 00:06:47,657 --> 00:06:48,825 that would be really cool. 299 00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:50,659 - He's your new assistant. 300 00:06:50,784 --> 00:06:52,162 But, no, I can sing, and I'll 301 00:06:50,784 --> 00:06:52,162 be happy to get you a waffle. 302 00:06:52,328 --> 00:06:54,205 Do you prefer syrup 303 00:06:52,328 --> 00:06:54,205 or whipped cream? 304 00:06:54,372 --> 00:06:56,409 As a matter of fact, I'll just 305 00:06:54,372 --> 00:06:56,409 bring you both--one second. 306 00:06:56,207 --> 00:06:57,792 - So, uh, what's up with dude? 307 00:06:57,959 --> 00:06:59,336 - Look, man, 308 00:06:57,959 --> 00:06:59,336 I heard what you said 309 00:06:59,502 --> 00:07:01,870 about dropping the ball, 310 00:06:59,502 --> 00:07:01,870 and you were so right. 311 00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,297 So I fixed the problem. 312 00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,297 [chuckles] 313 00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:03,757 - Yeah, but I thought 314 00:07:03,923 --> 00:07:05,508 you was gonna blow off 315 00:07:03,923 --> 00:07:05,508 that other client. 316 00:07:05,675 --> 00:07:08,970 I mean, has Jordan even had 317 00:07:05,675 --> 00:07:08,970 any previous elfing experience? 318 00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:10,889 - You don't need experience 319 00:07:09,137 --> 00:07:10,889 to get bit 320 00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:12,974 by a bunch of damn kids. 321 00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:15,352 Look, whatever you need, 322 00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:15,352 he got you. 323 00:07:15,518 --> 00:07:16,811 - I don't know. 324 00:07:16,978 --> 00:07:19,314 - * I've got waffles 325 00:07:16,978 --> 00:07:19,314 for Kenan * 326 00:07:19,481 --> 00:07:20,440 * Ooh, yeah 327 00:07:20,607 --> 00:07:22,609 * Syrup and whipped cream 328 00:07:22,734 --> 00:07:24,778 * Ooh, yeah, hey 329 00:07:24,903 --> 00:07:26,112 - Brother got waffles 330 00:07:24,903 --> 00:07:26,112 and a perfect pitch. 331 00:07:26,279 --> 00:07:28,323 Y'all have fun. 332 00:07:26,279 --> 00:07:28,323 Ooh, off to my meeting. 333 00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:31,493 - Damn. I guess I don't want 334 00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:31,493 to let this go to waste. 335 00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:32,952 - * Ooh, yeah, tastes good 336 00:07:38,166 --> 00:07:38,291 . 337 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:42,796 - Okay, no pressure, everyone, 338 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:42,796 but this performance 339 00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:45,548 could be my ticket 340 00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:45,548 out of this Podunk town. 341 00:07:45,715 --> 00:07:47,258 - What's a Podunk town? 342 00:07:47,425 --> 00:07:48,885 - It's a town where most people 343 00:07:47,425 --> 00:07:48,885 aren't vaccinated. 344 00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:52,347 - Hey, ladies, focus. 345 00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:52,347 Rick, hit it. 346 00:07:52,514 --> 00:07:54,265 - Uh, not yet. 347 00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:57,477 I have this little issue that 348 00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:57,477 I need to bring to the band. 349 00:07:57,644 --> 00:07:59,200 - Okay. 350 00:07:57,644 --> 00:07:59,200 - [clears throat] 351 00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:00,855 I should sing lead. 352 00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:00,855 - Ha! 353 00:08:01,220 --> 00:08:03,483 Excuse me? 354 00:08:01,220 --> 00:08:03,483 I'm an incredible singer. 355 00:08:03,650 --> 00:08:05,443 - Yeah, but I'm a professional. 356 00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:07,237 I'm used to being front 357 00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:07,237 and center, 358 00:08:07,404 --> 00:08:09,656 and you're used to playing 359 00:08:07,404 --> 00:08:09,656 second fiddle 360 00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:11,408 on Kenan's morning show. 361 00:08:11,574 --> 00:08:12,784 No offense. 362 00:08:12,951 --> 00:08:14,786 - Ooh. 363 00:08:12,951 --> 00:08:14,786 - [gasps] 364 00:08:14,953 --> 00:08:16,746 Rick, I sing lead. 365 00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:18,248 That's why we're called 366 00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:21,420 Tami and the "Wake Up" 367 00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:21,420 Christmas Band. 368 00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:24,629 Now, stop being such a diva 369 00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:24,629 and do as I say. 370 00:08:24,796 --> 00:08:27,799 - [chuckles] 371 00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:30,100 There's only one diva 372 00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:30,100 in this room, 373 00:08:30,135 --> 00:08:33,929 and it ain't me 374 00:08:30,135 --> 00:08:33,929 or her, her, them or him. 375 00:08:36,725 --> 00:08:39,394 - I think he's saying it's you. 376 00:08:36,725 --> 00:08:39,394 - I get it, Bruce! 377 00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:43,356 - Welcome to the 378 00:08:43,481 --> 00:08:47,318 "Wake Up with Kenan" 379 00:08:43,481 --> 00:08:47,318 Holiday Spectacular. 380 00:08:47,485 --> 00:08:50,321 We have got hours 381 00:08:47,485 --> 00:08:50,321 of fun in store. 382 00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:54,409 We'll even show you how 383 00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:54,409 to stuff your Christmas goose. 384 00:08:54,576 --> 00:08:56,411 Uh... 385 00:08:56,578 --> 00:08:58,621 So... 386 00:09:00,582 --> 00:09:04,169 A goose is when somebody 387 00:09:00,582 --> 00:09:04,169 pokes you in the tushy. 388 00:09:04,336 --> 00:09:06,504 - Prompter is out. 389 00:09:04,336 --> 00:09:06,504 Oh. 390 00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:08,506 We're all living 391 00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:08,506 in Pam Chop's world now 392 00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:11,510 - You want to hear a limerick? 393 00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:11,510 I love limericks. 394 00:09:11,176 --> 00:09:13,345 There once was an elf 395 00:09:11,176 --> 00:09:13,345 from Nantucket. 396 00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:14,637 Yeah, and then what? 397 00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:16,806 Well, I can't remember 398 00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:16,806 what rhymes with Nantucket. 399 00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:19,267 Hmm. 400 00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:19,267 Oh, I remember. 401 00:09:19,434 --> 00:09:21,269 [stammers] 402 00:09:21,436 --> 00:09:25,148 From the North Pole, 403 00:09:21,436 --> 00:09:25,148 please welcome Santa. 404 00:09:26,691 --> 00:09:32,155 - Ho-ho-ho, ho-ho-ho-ho. 405 00:09:26,691 --> 00:09:32,155 Merry Christmas, Atlanta. 406 00:09:32,322 --> 00:09:34,282 Kenan Claus wants you 407 00:09:32,322 --> 00:09:34,282 to bring an unwrapped toy 408 00:09:34,449 --> 00:09:37,118 down here to Santa's village. 409 00:09:37,285 --> 00:09:39,245 That's right. We've got games. 410 00:09:39,371 --> 00:09:42,457 We've got food, and we've got 411 00:09:39,371 --> 00:09:42,457 a reindeer petting zoo, 412 00:09:42,582 --> 00:09:45,585 which is really just 413 00:09:42,582 --> 00:09:45,585 a bunch of dogs with horns. 414 00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:46,544 We'll see you soon. 415 00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:48,171 All right, thanks. 416 00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:51,633 - That was great work, boss. 417 00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:51,633 - Hey! 418 00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:54,177 Dang, bro, back up, man. 419 00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:54,177 I was about to piece you up. 420 00:09:54,344 --> 00:09:55,720 - Sorry. I just wanted 421 00:09:54,344 --> 00:09:55,720 to let you know 422 00:09:55,887 --> 00:09:58,181 I got you some heating gels 423 00:09:55,887 --> 00:09:58,181 to warm up your hands 424 00:09:58,348 --> 00:10:00,725 and a peppermint mocha 425 00:09:58,348 --> 00:10:00,725 to warm up your belly. 426 00:10:00,892 --> 00:10:04,229 - Look, man, you're trying 427 00:10:00,892 --> 00:10:04,229 too hard, all right? 428 00:10:04,354 --> 00:10:07,650 Let me explain 429 00:10:04,354 --> 00:10:07,650 to you what I'm used to, okay? 430 00:10:07,232 --> 00:10:09,670 You say you're gonna go pick up 431 00:10:07,232 --> 00:10:09,670 my dry cleaning, 432 00:10:09,234 --> 00:10:11,361 and then you show up two days 433 00:10:09,234 --> 00:10:11,361 later wearing the clothes. 434 00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:13,530 - Oh, okay, I'm sorry. 435 00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:13,530 I'll work on that. 436 00:10:13,697 --> 00:10:15,198 Do you have any other 437 00:10:13,697 --> 00:10:15,198 constructive criticism for me? 438 00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:16,700 - Oh, no, all the construction 439 00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:16,700 is done, man. 440 00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:18,493 Appreciate that-- 441 00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,328 Stop being so smart. 442 00:10:20,495 --> 00:10:22,622 - Okay, dumb it down, 443 00:10:20,495 --> 00:10:22,622 dumb it down--I can do that. 444 00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:24,541 [upbeat holiday music] 445 00:10:24,708 --> 00:10:26,420 - * Christmas 446 00:10:26,167 --> 00:10:28,378 - * The snow is coming down 447 00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:29,796 - * Christmas 448 00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:32,480 - * I am watching it fall 449 00:10:32,215 --> 00:10:33,967 - * Christmas 450 00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:36,594 both: * Lots of people around 451 00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:37,846 - Whoa, extra voice! 452 00:10:38,130 --> 00:10:39,597 - Well, you were just so sharp 453 00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:42,580 that I thought a little bass 454 00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:42,580 would even things out. 455 00:10:42,225 --> 00:10:44,600 - Did someone say bass? 456 00:10:42,225 --> 00:10:44,600 [plays notes] 457 00:10:44,227 --> 00:10:46,229 - When I want bass, 458 00:10:44,227 --> 00:10:46,229 I'll ask for bass, Bruce. 459 00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:49,107 - [plays note] 460 00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:49,107 - And I wasn't sharp. 461 00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:51,670 - Let's ask Trish. 462 00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:52,569 Trish, was Tami sharp? 463 00:10:52,736 --> 00:10:54,446 - Whatever you say, baby. 464 00:10:54,571 --> 00:10:56,573 - Who is Trish? 465 00:10:54,571 --> 00:10:56,573 - She's my muse. 466 00:10:56,740 --> 00:10:58,658 I met her outside 467 00:10:56,740 --> 00:10:58,658 at the candy applecart. 468 00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:00,350 - Welcome, Trish. 469 00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:00,350 - Thanks. 470 00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:01,828 - Don't welcome Trish. 471 00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,580 And Trish doesn't get a vote. 472 00:11:03,747 --> 00:11:06,499 - Trish is just as much 473 00:11:03,747 --> 00:11:06,499 a part of this band as anybody. 474 00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:08,376 - Okay, I've had it. 475 00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:08,376 I've had it! 476 00:11:08,543 --> 00:11:10,300 Ha ha! 477 00:11:11,796 --> 00:11:13,423 - Okay, people, 478 00:11:11,796 --> 00:11:13,423 I need a cleanup crew. 479 00:11:13,590 --> 00:11:15,508 Someone done barfed 480 00:11:13,590 --> 00:11:15,508 all over the gingerbread house. 481 00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:17,427 Ooh, careful. 482 00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:17,427 [bell dinging] 483 00:11:17,552 --> 00:11:19,763 That will be a boo-boo for you 484 00:11:17,552 --> 00:11:19,763 and a lot of paperwork for me. 485 00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:22,265 Okay, everybody-- 486 00:11:22,432 --> 00:11:24,726 - Thank you. 487 00:11:24,893 --> 00:11:27,620 - Oh. 488 00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:28,521 Do you know you are 489 00:11:27,228 --> 00:11:28,521 the first person 490 00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:30,565 who has thanked me 491 00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:30,565 at work in ten years? 492 00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:33,109 Everyone else thinks I'm here 493 00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:33,109 to solve their problems. 494 00:11:33,276 --> 00:11:34,861 - Mika, I have a problem. 495 00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:36,446 - Me too. 496 00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:36,446 - Here. 497 00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:38,448 Go buy yourself 498 00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:38,448 a bucket of kettle corn. 499 00:11:40,283 --> 00:11:41,576 What y'all got? 500 00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:43,787 - He's impossible. 501 00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:43,787 - [chuckles derisively] 502 00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:47,582 She's a nightmare. 503 00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:47,582 You got to choose--me or Tami. 504 00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:50,627 - Tami. 505 00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:50,627 - Wait a minute, wait. 506 00:11:50,794 --> 00:11:52,545 Don't you want to take a moment 507 00:11:50,794 --> 00:11:52,545 and think about that? 508 00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:56,591 - Nah, Tami works here, and you 509 00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:56,591 live in Kenan's basement. 510 00:11:56,758 --> 00:11:59,177 - It's a converted garage. 511 00:11:56,758 --> 00:11:59,177 - Mm... 512 00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:01,540 - Okay, fine. 513 00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:01,540 You're probably right. 514 00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:03,264 It's just been a long time 515 00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:03,264 since I've got to lead a band, 516 00:12:03,431 --> 00:12:04,766 and I-- 517 00:12:04,933 --> 00:12:08,395 [sighs] That was just 518 00:12:04,933 --> 00:12:08,395 the best part of my life. 519 00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:10,630 Maybe I just went 520 00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:10,630 a little overboard 521 00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:13,358 trying to get 522 00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:13,358 that feeling back. 523 00:12:13,525 --> 00:12:16,528 [explosion] 524 00:12:13,525 --> 00:12:16,528 - Mika, the gift van exploded! 525 00:12:16,695 --> 00:12:17,320 - Okay. Excuse me. 526 00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:19,823 I have to go put out 527 00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:19,823 a literal fire. 528 00:12:19,989 --> 00:12:22,409 Here, go buy yourself 529 00:12:19,989 --> 00:12:22,409 a bucket of kettle corn. 530 00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,244 I told y'all not 531 00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,244 to put fireworks-- 532 00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:27,831 - All right, well, 533 00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:27,831 I guess this band is yours. 534 00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:29,833 Merry Christmas 535 00:12:31,501 --> 00:12:33,128 - I mean, 536 00:12:31,501 --> 00:12:33,128 people have been doing 537 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,754 "your mama" jokes for years. 538 00:12:34,879 --> 00:12:36,673 Then you come out 539 00:12:34,879 --> 00:12:36,673 with "your papa" jokes? 540 00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:38,633 [scoffs] 541 00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:38,633 Game changed. 542 00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:40,343 - It's an untapped gold mine. 543 00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:40,343 - Mm-hmm. 544 00:12:40,510 --> 00:12:41,636 - Plus, I hate my mama. 545 00:12:41,803 --> 00:12:43,130 - Yeah. 546 00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:44,889 You said that several times. 547 00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:44,889 - Mm-hmm. 548 00:12:45,560 --> 00:12:47,475 - Well, look, 549 00:12:45,560 --> 00:12:47,475 I'm here to manage your career. 550 00:12:47,642 --> 00:12:49,602 And unlike your mama, 551 00:12:47,642 --> 00:12:49,602 I'ma always give you 552 00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:52,188 my undivided attention. 553 00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:52,188 - Okay. 554 00:12:52,313 --> 00:12:55,734 [cell phone vibrating] 555 00:12:55,900 --> 00:12:58,528 - Uh, and I'm still giving you 556 00:12:55,900 --> 00:12:58,528 my undivided attention, 557 00:12:58,695 --> 00:13:00,321 but I do got to take this-- 558 00:12:58,695 --> 00:13:00,321 one second. 559 00:13:00,488 --> 00:13:01,740 Kenan, what's up, man? 560 00:13:00,488 --> 00:13:01,740 You good? 561 00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:03,366 - Man. Hell, no! 562 00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:05,660 Your fancy-ass assistant 563 00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:05,660 up and quit on me. 564 00:13:05,827 --> 00:13:07,537 - What? What do you mean 565 00:13:05,827 --> 00:13:07,537 Jordan quit? 566 00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:10,810 He's like the most responsible 567 00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:10,810 person I ever met in my life. 568 00:13:10,206 --> 00:13:11,458 - Yeah, well, he packed up 569 00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,126 his delicious little waffles 570 00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,126 and bounced. 571 00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:14,753 What's up with that, man? 572 00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:16,171 It is bad enough that Black 573 00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:16,171 Santa has got to work 574 00:13:16,338 --> 00:13:17,380 twice as hard 575 00:13:16,338 --> 00:13:17,380 to get half as far. 576 00:13:17,547 --> 00:13:19,215 I need you here now, bro. 577 00:13:19,382 --> 00:13:22,930 - [sighs] All right. 578 00:13:19,382 --> 00:13:22,930 Okay, I'm on my way, man. 579 00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:23,762 - Thank you. 580 00:13:23,928 --> 00:13:25,305 - Hey, so, uh, 581 00:13:25,430 --> 00:13:27,515 got to go to go take care 582 00:13:25,430 --> 00:13:27,515 of something real quick. 583 00:13:27,682 --> 00:13:28,975 I'm so sorry. 584 00:13:27,682 --> 00:13:28,975 You got this? 585 00:13:36,191 --> 00:13:36,316 . 586 00:13:37,859 --> 00:13:40,236 [indistinct chatter] 587 00:13:40,945 --> 00:13:41,946 - Hi, Santa. 588 00:13:40,945 --> 00:13:41,946 - Hi. 589 00:13:42,113 --> 00:13:44,157 - Hi, Santa. 590 00:13:42,113 --> 00:13:44,157 - Hi. 591 00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,326 - Hey, I'm sorry I'm late, 592 00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,326 but I'm here. 593 00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:49,790 - Man, you coming in late 594 00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:49,790 is right on time. 595 00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:50,622 So, um, how did it go 596 00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:50,622 with Shaunda. 597 00:13:50,789 --> 00:13:54,709 - Oh, man, that's dead, 598 00:13:50,789 --> 00:13:54,709 but, you know, I'm cool. 599 00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:56,461 Hey, they got the blood 600 00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:56,461 out the suit. 601 00:13:56,628 --> 00:13:58,588 - Nothing too good 602 00:13:56,628 --> 00:13:58,588 for my little Gary Gumdrop. 603 00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:00,131 That's my elf name 604 00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:00,131 for you this year. 605 00:14:00,298 --> 00:14:01,424 Come on, let's do this, man. 606 00:14:01,591 --> 00:14:03,385 - All right, man, one second. 607 00:14:01,591 --> 00:14:03,385 [cell phone vibrating] 608 00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:04,928 What the hell are you 609 00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:04,928 calling me for, Jordan? 610 00:14:05,950 --> 00:14:07,972 You make Gary Gumdrop 611 00:14:05,950 --> 00:14:07,972 look as dumb as hell. 612 00:14:08,139 --> 00:14:09,516 Wait, Kenan did what? 613 00:14:09,683 --> 00:14:12,352 - Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho. 614 00:14:09,683 --> 00:14:12,352 [kids cheering] 615 00:14:18,650 --> 00:14:20,193 - Oh, don't worry, 616 00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:21,486 I'm just packing up my gear. 617 00:14:21,611 --> 00:14:24,155 I'll be out of your way 618 00:14:21,611 --> 00:14:24,155 in a second. 619 00:14:24,322 --> 00:14:27,409 - [hoarsely] Actually, all that 620 00:14:24,322 --> 00:14:27,409 arguing blew out my voice, 621 00:14:27,575 --> 00:14:30,453 so the band could use 622 00:14:27,575 --> 00:14:30,453 a singer after all. 623 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:32,247 - Really? 624 00:14:32,414 --> 00:14:35,125 You sure you're not 625 00:14:32,414 --> 00:14:35,125 just throwing me a bone 626 00:14:35,290 --> 00:14:37,430 because of the Christmas spirit 627 00:14:35,290 --> 00:14:37,430 and all? 628 00:14:37,168 --> 00:14:38,795 - Have you met me? 629 00:14:38,962 --> 00:14:41,881 Are you sure you didn't bow out 630 00:14:38,962 --> 00:14:41,881 as a way to sort of say 631 00:14:42,480 --> 00:14:44,384 "sorry things got out of hand"? 632 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:47,950 - Have you met me? 633 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:47,950 - Good. 634 00:14:47,262 --> 00:14:48,763 Then neither of us 635 00:14:47,262 --> 00:14:48,763 are apologizing 636 00:14:48,930 --> 00:14:50,974 just 'cause 637 00:14:48,930 --> 00:14:50,974 it's Jesus's birthday 638 00:14:51,141 --> 00:14:52,308 - Deal. 639 00:14:57,939 --> 00:14:59,816 - And it almost hit me. 640 00:14:59,983 --> 00:15:02,110 - Well, I'm so sorry 641 00:14:59,983 --> 00:15:02,110 about the train incident there, 642 00:15:02,277 --> 00:15:03,445 little Timmy, but not to worry. 643 00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:05,405 My elf has got a gift for you. 644 00:15:05,572 --> 00:15:07,949 Ain't that right--Hey! 645 00:15:05,572 --> 00:15:07,949 [crowd gasps] 646 00:15:08,116 --> 00:15:10,326 - Uh... 647 00:15:10,493 --> 00:15:12,662 looks like Garry Gumdrop 648 00:15:10,493 --> 00:15:12,662 has been training 649 00:15:12,829 --> 00:15:13,830 for the Elf-lympics 650 00:15:13,955 --> 00:15:15,915 to probably represent 651 00:15:13,955 --> 00:15:15,915 the powerful country 652 00:15:16,820 --> 00:15:17,876 of Elf-Salvador 653 00:15:16,820 --> 00:15:17,876 or something like that. 654 00:15:18,430 --> 00:15:19,502 - No, I ain't, kid. 655 00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:21,629 Santa's lying because 656 00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:21,629 he is as selfish as hell. 657 00:15:21,796 --> 00:15:24,257 [crowd gasps] 658 00:15:21,796 --> 00:15:24,257 - Hey, what's going on, man? 659 00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:25,592 You lose your scripts 660 00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:25,592 or something? 661 00:15:25,759 --> 00:15:26,885 - Jordan didn't quit. 662 00:15:25,759 --> 00:15:26,885 You fired him. 663 00:15:27,520 --> 00:15:28,762 [crowd oohs] 664 00:15:28,928 --> 00:15:30,138 Ooh is right children. 665 00:15:30,305 --> 00:15:31,848 You made me leave 666 00:15:30,305 --> 00:15:31,848 the most important meeting 667 00:15:32,150 --> 00:15:33,183 in my career for nothing. 668 00:15:33,350 --> 00:15:35,180 - Okay, yes. All right. 669 00:15:33,350 --> 00:15:35,180 I fired him. 670 00:15:35,143 --> 00:15:36,853 But it's only because 671 00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:38,646 none of this would be right 672 00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:38,646 without you. 673 00:15:38,813 --> 00:15:40,357 So can we talk 674 00:15:38,813 --> 00:15:40,357 about this later? 675 00:15:40,523 --> 00:15:42,108 We are on TV right now. 676 00:15:42,233 --> 00:15:45,779 - Mm-mm, no. The reckoning 677 00:15:42,233 --> 00:15:45,779 is happening right now, man, 678 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,406 'cause you always got to be the 679 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,406 big dog with me in your shadow. 680 00:15:48,573 --> 00:15:49,824 - That is not true. 681 00:15:49,991 --> 00:15:51,576 - Then why do you always 682 00:15:49,991 --> 00:15:51,576 get to be Santa, 683 00:15:51,743 --> 00:15:53,536 and I got to be the elf 684 00:15:51,743 --> 00:15:53,536 with some stupid-ass name 685 00:15:53,703 --> 00:15:55,163 and these stupid big old shoes? 686 00:15:55,330 --> 00:15:56,706 You know what? I'm done. 687 00:15:58,333 --> 00:16:01,211 [crowd gasps] 688 00:16:01,378 --> 00:16:02,962 [shouting indistinctly] 689 00:16:03,129 --> 00:16:04,756 - Uh, ladies and gentlemen, 690 00:16:04,923 --> 00:16:07,967 that concludes our Christmas 691 00:16:04,923 --> 00:16:07,967 adaptation of August Wilson's, 692 00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:09,594 " Santa's Black Bottom." 693 00:16:09,761 --> 00:16:11,554 Uh, thank you. 694 00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:13,556 Go on, take a bow there, Timmy. 695 00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:13,556 Thank you very much. 696 00:16:13,723 --> 00:16:15,684 - All right, everybody, 697 00:16:13,723 --> 00:16:15,684 we're back in three minutes.. 698 00:16:15,850 --> 00:16:18,269 Back in three minutes, 699 00:16:15,850 --> 00:16:18,269 everyone, for outer six. 700 00:16:18,436 --> 00:16:21,481 Let's get Pam... 701 00:16:18,436 --> 00:16:21,481 - [sighs] 702 00:16:21,606 --> 00:16:23,233 Whew. 703 00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:28,238 Hmm. 704 00:16:28,405 --> 00:16:30,615 - Do you just sneak into 705 00:16:28,405 --> 00:16:30,615 my office all the time 706 00:16:30,782 --> 00:16:32,701 or just on major holidays? 707 00:16:32,867 --> 00:16:37,247 - I am so sorry. I-I just 708 00:16:32,867 --> 00:16:37,247 needed a moment to myself. 709 00:16:37,372 --> 00:16:39,540 - Hey, I get it. 710 00:16:37,372 --> 00:16:39,540 - Yeah. 711 00:16:39,708 --> 00:16:43,860 - I don't know 712 00:16:39,708 --> 00:16:43,860 what to do about Gary. 713 00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:45,460 - Okay. 714 00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:46,339 I am listening. 715 00:16:46,464 --> 00:16:47,924 - I mean, it's not 716 00:16:48,910 --> 00:16:50,677 that I don't want him 717 00:16:48,910 --> 00:16:50,677 to be more successful than me. 718 00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:52,762 I want him to have 719 00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:52,762 other clients. 720 00:16:52,929 --> 00:16:55,181 - Well, if it's not about the 721 00:16:52,929 --> 00:16:55,181 clients, then what's it about? 722 00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:56,433 - Man, I don't know. 723 00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:56,433 It just-- 724 00:16:56,558 --> 00:16:58,810 Christmas used to be 725 00:16:56,558 --> 00:16:58,810 such a special day between us. 726 00:16:58,977 --> 00:17:00,437 - Kenan, it's one day. 727 00:17:00,603 --> 00:17:02,647 - Yeah, and if he's busy on 728 00:17:00,603 --> 00:17:02,647 this one day 729 00:17:02,814 --> 00:17:04,898 with his other clients, 730 00:17:02,814 --> 00:17:04,898 then the rest of the days 731 00:17:05,660 --> 00:17:07,359 of the year 732 00:17:05,660 --> 00:17:07,359 ain't gonna stand chance. 733 00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:10,571 - I think your relationship can 734 00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:10,571 survive a little more distance. 735 00:17:10,739 --> 00:17:12,781 I mean, I heard y'all 736 00:17:10,739 --> 00:17:12,781 bathe together, so, like... 737 00:17:12,949 --> 00:17:15,160 - Yeah, when we were babies. 738 00:17:12,949 --> 00:17:15,160 - Oh, we calling 13 a baby now? 739 00:17:15,326 --> 00:17:18,790 - Look, the point is 740 00:17:18,246 --> 00:17:21,708 I'm just not ready 741 00:17:18,246 --> 00:17:21,708 to lose my little Gare bro. 742 00:17:21,833 --> 00:17:24,627 - Well, do you want them 743 00:17:21,833 --> 00:17:24,627 to just be your Gare bro, 744 00:17:24,794 --> 00:17:26,838 or do you want him 745 00:17:24,794 --> 00:17:26,838 to be his own person? 746 00:17:26,963 --> 00:17:28,757 - [sighs] 747 00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:30,800 Sounds like a trick question, 748 00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:30,800 but I know it's not. 749 00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:32,552 - Mm-hmm. 750 00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:35,430 Well, I'll let you 751 00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:35,430 think about it. 752 00:17:35,597 --> 00:17:36,806 Is there, uh, 753 00:17:35,597 --> 00:17:36,806 anything else you want 754 00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:40,393 to say to old Mika 755 00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:40,393 for helping you out? 756 00:17:46,149 --> 00:17:46,274 . 757 00:17:47,942 --> 00:17:51,905 [upbeat music] 758 00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:54,741 - Attention, everyone-- 759 00:17:53,448 --> 00:17:54,741 our holiday musical finale 760 00:17:54,908 --> 00:17:57,994 will begin shortly 761 00:17:54,908 --> 00:17:57,994 on the main stage. 762 00:17:58,161 --> 00:18:00,538 - Hey. 763 00:17:58,161 --> 00:18:00,538 - What you doing here? 764 00:18:00,705 --> 00:18:02,332 Ain't Santa Claus supposed to 765 00:18:00,705 --> 00:18:02,332 be closing the show 766 00:18:02,499 --> 00:18:04,000 in a few minutes? 767 00:18:04,167 --> 00:18:05,627 - Uh, yes, he is. 768 00:18:05,794 --> 00:18:08,630 So you better get on up there. 769 00:18:08,797 --> 00:18:10,215 I want you to be the big man. 770 00:18:10,340 --> 00:18:11,466 - Please, 771 00:18:10,340 --> 00:18:11,466 you're just doing this 772 00:18:11,633 --> 00:18:12,717 to make yourself feel better. 773 00:18:12,884 --> 00:18:14,844 - Oh! Uh... 774 00:18:15,110 --> 00:18:17,889 no, actually, 775 00:18:15,110 --> 00:18:17,889 I'm doing it for you. 776 00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:20,308 And I told Shaunda 777 00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:20,308 to come down here. 778 00:18:20,475 --> 00:18:22,102 - She's here? 779 00:18:20,475 --> 00:18:22,102 - Well, no. 780 00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:24,479 She actually told me to go 781 00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:24,479 straight to hell, but I tried. 782 00:18:24,646 --> 00:18:26,314 Oh! All right. 783 00:18:24,646 --> 00:18:26,314 You know what? 784 00:18:26,481 --> 00:18:28,358 I'ma just hold on 785 00:18:26,481 --> 00:18:28,358 to this for you. 786 00:18:28,525 --> 00:18:30,568 [clears throat] 787 00:18:28,525 --> 00:18:30,568 Look, man, I'm sorry. 788 00:18:30,735 --> 00:18:33,238 It's just--it's always been 789 00:18:30,735 --> 00:18:33,238 the Williams brothers, 790 00:18:33,363 --> 00:18:35,310 and I don't want that 791 00:18:33,363 --> 00:18:35,310 to change. 792 00:18:35,198 --> 00:18:38,118 - It's not gonna change, man. 793 00:18:35,198 --> 00:18:38,118 I'm not going nowhere. 794 00:18:38,284 --> 00:18:40,370 - You're not hearing me. 795 00:18:40,537 --> 00:18:44,833 You are going places, 796 00:18:40,537 --> 00:18:44,833 and you deserve to be... 797 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:47,430 and I just got to be cool 798 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:47,430 with that. 799 00:18:47,210 --> 00:18:48,378 And I am. 800 00:18:50,922 --> 00:18:53,466 - Excuse me, Vixen. 801 00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:55,427 Man, give me the damn suit. 802 00:18:55,593 --> 00:18:57,554 - Yeah! That's my brother. 803 00:18:57,721 --> 00:18:59,973 Come on, man, let's calibrate 804 00:18:57,721 --> 00:18:59,973 how many hos you gonna do 805 00:19:00,140 --> 00:19:01,349 so you can make it your own. 806 00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:04,561 - Well, it has been 807 00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:04,561 a wonderful day. 808 00:19:04,728 --> 00:19:06,688 Thank you everybody 809 00:19:04,728 --> 00:19:06,688 for joining us. 810 00:19:06,855 --> 00:19:11,443 And now for our grand finale. 811 00:19:11,609 --> 00:19:13,903 - Okay, people, listen up. 812 00:19:14,290 --> 00:19:16,720 We have one more song, and then 813 00:19:14,290 --> 00:19:16,720 Christmas is finally over. 814 00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:17,824 - Mika, we need you 815 00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:17,824 on the stage quick. 816 00:19:17,991 --> 00:19:19,492 There's an emergency. 817 00:19:17,991 --> 00:19:19,492 - What? 818 00:19:19,659 --> 00:19:21,995 What are you talking about? 819 00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:24,831 [cheers and applause] 820 00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:31,400 - Hi, everybody. 821 00:19:31,171 --> 00:19:33,381 I just want to introduce y'all 822 00:19:31,171 --> 00:19:33,381 to our executive producer, 823 00:19:33,548 --> 00:19:35,910 Mika Caldwell, 824 00:19:35,258 --> 00:19:37,927 who makes today and every day 825 00:19:35,258 --> 00:19:37,927 around here possible. 826 00:19:38,940 --> 00:19:40,930 And she thinks we don't notice, 827 00:19:38,940 --> 00:19:40,930 but, Mika, we love you. 828 00:19:41,970 --> 00:19:43,767 Thank you so very much 829 00:19:41,970 --> 00:19:43,767 for all you do. 830 00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:45,810 Mika Caldwell! 831 00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:45,810 [cheers and applause] 832 00:19:45,977 --> 00:19:47,479 - Oh, Tami! 833 00:19:47,645 --> 00:19:49,230 Y'all appreciate me. Okay. 834 00:19:49,397 --> 00:19:50,940 - Yes, we do 835 00:19:49,397 --> 00:19:50,940 appreciate you, Mika. 836 00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:52,942 All right, Santa, 837 00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:52,942 you want to light the tree? 838 00:19:53,109 --> 00:19:55,320 - [clears throat] 839 00:19:55,445 --> 00:19:59,449 Merry Christmas everyone. 840 00:19:55,445 --> 00:19:59,449 Ho-ho. 841 00:19:59,574 --> 00:20:02,327 - Two hos, brilliant. 842 00:20:02,452 --> 00:20:05,455 [all gasp, 843 00:20:02,452 --> 00:20:05,455 cheers and applause] 844 00:20:05,622 --> 00:20:06,873 - Okay. 845 00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:08,958 [holiday music playing] 846 00:20:09,125 --> 00:20:10,585 - * Christmas 847 00:20:10,752 --> 00:20:12,796 - * The snow is coming down 848 00:20:12,962 --> 00:20:14,172 - * Christmas 849 00:20:14,339 --> 00:20:16,800 - * I'm watching it fall 850 00:20:16,966 --> 00:20:18,259 - * Christmas 851 00:20:18,385 --> 00:20:20,804 - * Lots of people around 852 00:20:20,970 --> 00:20:24,265 - * Christmas 853 00:20:20,970 --> 00:20:24,265 - * Baby, please come home 854 00:20:24,391 --> 00:20:26,309 - * Christmas 855 00:20:26,434 --> 00:20:28,269 - * The church bells in town 856 00:20:28,395 --> 00:20:30,630 - * Christmas 857 00:20:30,230 --> 00:20:32,482 - * All ringing in song 858 00:20:32,649 --> 00:20:34,150 - * Christmas 859 00:20:34,275 --> 00:20:36,319 - * Full of happy sounds 860 00:20:36,486 --> 00:20:37,737 - * Christmas 861 00:20:37,904 --> 00:20:40,824 - * Baby, please come home 862 00:20:40,990 --> 00:20:44,911 * They're singing 863 00:20:40,990 --> 00:20:44,911 "Deck The Halls" * 864 00:20:45,780 --> 00:20:48,581 * But it's not like 865 00:20:45,780 --> 00:20:48,581 Christmas at all * 866 00:20:48,707 --> 00:20:52,544 * 'Cause I remember 867 00:20:48,707 --> 00:20:52,544 when you were here * 868 00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:56,923 * And all the fun 869 00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:56,923 we had last year * 870 00:20:57,900 --> 00:20:58,967 - * Please 871 00:20:57,900 --> 00:20:58,967 - * Please 872 00:20:59,134 --> 00:21:01,845 - * Please 873 00:20:59,134 --> 00:21:01,845 - Take us home, Tami. 874 00:21:02,120 --> 00:21:06,990 * Please, baby, please 875 00:21:02,120 --> 00:21:06,990 come home * 876 00:21:06,266 --> 00:21:10,562 [cheers and applause] 877 00:21:06,266 --> 00:21:10,562 * Baby, please come home 878 00:21:10,729 --> 00:21:15,660 * Baby, please come home 879 00:21:15,233 --> 00:21:17,569 * Baby, please come home 880 00:21:15,233 --> 00:21:17,569 - Yeah, go on, girl! 881 00:21:17,736 --> 00:21:21,406 * Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah 882 00:21:21,573 --> 00:21:24,701 [cheers and applause] 883 00:21:24,868 --> 00:21:27,954 - Merry Christmas, everybody! 884 00:21:24,868 --> 00:21:27,954 - Oh, thank you. 885 00:21:28,121 --> 00:21:29,873 I'm feeling better. 886 00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:31,791 - Merry Christmas, Pam. 887 00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:31,791 Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho.