1 00:00:06,631 --> 00:00:08,673 We're gonna suck a person out of this person! 2 00:00:08,756 --> 00:00:11,506 Oh! 3 00:00:11,589 --> 00:00:13,214 -You killed it. -What? 4 00:00:13,756 --> 00:00:16,089 I'm smiling, you killed it. Like... 5 00:00:18,464 --> 00:00:19,673 -What is that? 6 00:00:19,756 --> 00:00:21,339 It's an oxygen leak. 7 00:00:21,422 --> 00:00:23,047 What is this ship made of? 8 00:00:23,130 --> 00:00:24,005 -Tinfoil? 9 00:00:24,297 --> 00:00:25,798 You need to change the way they see the ship. 10 00:00:25,881 --> 00:00:28,381 Are you talking about lasers? 11 00:00:29,631 --> 00:00:32,089 The president suggested we lose 500 people. 12 00:00:32,172 --> 00:00:33,798 You're just gonna kill 500 passengers? 13 00:00:34,964 --> 00:00:36,506 The Beeping is the ship telling us 14 00:00:36,589 --> 00:00:38,089 to recalibrate for the baby. 15 00:00:38,172 --> 00:00:40,005 -We have air?! -Yeah, we have air. 16 00:00:40,089 --> 00:00:41,464 And... light 'em up! 17 00:00:42,047 --> 00:00:43,047 He's transformed 18 00:00:43,130 --> 00:00:45,130 the most disgusting thing imaginable 19 00:00:45,214 --> 00:00:47,798 into a kaleidoscope of butt truffles. 20 00:00:55,381 --> 00:00:58,214 Space and luxury, a somewhat awkward marriage. 21 00:00:58,297 --> 00:01:00,214 But then, isn't every marriage? 22 00:01:00,297 --> 00:01:01,673 I know mine was! 23 00:01:01,756 --> 00:01:03,714 With comms down, we can't talk to Earth, 24 00:01:03,798 --> 00:01:06,547 but we can still swim like a mermaid, 25 00:01:06,631 --> 00:01:09,547 gamble like a gangster, eat like a beast. 26 00:01:09,631 --> 00:01:11,214 Some food flavorings may not be available. 27 00:01:11,297 --> 00:01:16,589 And spend hours marveling at our illuminated circle of turds! 28 00:01:18,089 --> 00:01:20,172 This thing is kind of mesmerizing 29 00:01:20,255 --> 00:01:22,255 since Mr. Judd lit it up. 30 00:01:23,089 --> 00:01:25,422 Oh. See that-- Look at right there. 31 00:01:25,506 --> 00:01:27,089 Looks like a burrito. 32 00:01:27,172 --> 00:01:28,506 Where? 33 00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:31,881 -Right-- See? It's moving. I'm not seeing a burrito. 34 00:01:31,964 --> 00:01:34,297 I can see a face there, kind of. 35 00:01:35,339 --> 00:01:36,673 It's maybe... 36 00:01:37,297 --> 00:01:39,047 John Paul. 37 00:01:39,130 --> 00:01:40,422 Beatles or Getty? 38 00:01:40,506 --> 00:01:41,881 I see the pope's face. 39 00:01:41,964 --> 00:01:44,422 Pope John Paul II. He was in at the turn of the century. 40 00:01:44,506 --> 00:01:45,589 Infallible, obviously, 41 00:01:45,673 --> 00:01:48,631 but great at apologizing for historical bad stuff. 42 00:01:48,714 --> 00:01:50,964 All I'm seeing is a lot of shiny excrement. 43 00:01:51,047 --> 00:01:52,464 I'm sorry, guys. 44 00:01:52,547 --> 00:01:54,547 JP was one of the good ones, too. 45 00:01:54,631 --> 00:01:56,130 Wasn't even a Nazi in his youth. 46 00:01:56,214 --> 00:02:00,089 I'm-- I'm just not sure a pope would choose to appear in shit. 47 00:02:00,172 --> 00:02:02,756 Wouldn't he pick, like, motor oil or pancakes? 48 00:02:02,839 --> 00:02:04,714 Honestly, I see his face. 49 00:02:05,964 --> 00:02:08,005 Maybe I'll see you later, Mr. Pope, 50 00:02:08,089 --> 00:02:11,172 since... I guess I'm the only one who can. 51 00:02:25,255 --> 00:02:27,214 Wow. Huh. 52 00:02:27,297 --> 00:02:29,673 It's like a screenshot from the Bible. 53 00:02:30,673 --> 00:02:33,756 So, when does this, uh, Caca Papa appear? 54 00:02:33,839 --> 00:02:35,714 Any second now. It's every 90 minutes. 55 00:02:35,798 --> 00:02:37,506 Yeah. You can set your watch by it. 56 00:02:37,589 --> 00:02:39,005 Although I prefer to use the onboard time-- 57 00:02:39,089 --> 00:02:41,547 MAN 1: Ah, there he is. Bless you. 58 00:02:41,631 --> 00:02:43,130 MAN 2: I wish I could kiss his ring. 59 00:02:43,214 --> 00:02:44,839 RYAN CLARK: Can you see it, Billie? 60 00:02:44,923 --> 00:02:48,589 The descent into barbarism? Yeah, I can see that clearly. 61 00:02:48,673 --> 00:02:50,172 The pope, I do not see. 62 00:02:50,255 --> 00:02:51,923 No, I don't see it either. 63 00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:53,881 But I can see the joy 64 00:02:53,964 --> 00:02:56,297 that his face puts on their faces. 65 00:02:56,881 --> 00:02:58,172 I don't understand. 66 00:02:58,255 --> 00:03:00,255 Joy. It's a-- it's a human emotion. 67 00:03:00,339 --> 00:03:02,172 Used to be quite popular. 68 00:03:02,255 --> 00:03:04,255 That right there, is that an ear? 69 00:03:04,339 --> 00:03:06,464 -No, it's a piece of shit. -Oh. 70 00:03:06,547 --> 00:03:09,255 As long as it keeps people from murdering me in my bed, I'll be happy. 71 00:03:09,339 --> 00:03:11,172 For fuck's sake, get out of my way. 72 00:03:11,255 --> 00:03:13,381 -Iris. -It's not making everyone happy. -It's Harrison. 73 00:03:13,464 --> 00:03:16,964 Get out of my way, you bunch of brides of Christ. -Let's go. 74 00:03:17,047 --> 00:03:19,172 -What-- Who-- What is-- Who? Fuck off! 75 00:03:19,255 --> 00:03:21,422 Who is Harrison? -Harrison. Harrison. 76 00:03:21,506 --> 00:03:23,756 Oh, that's just somebody that I'm not scared of. 77 00:03:23,839 --> 00:03:25,589 Why don't we talk about something else and not that guy 78 00:03:25,673 --> 00:03:28,964 'cause, honestly... ...who cares about him? Not me. 79 00:03:29,047 --> 00:03:30,297 Oh, hi, Captain. 80 00:03:30,381 --> 00:03:32,130 Hey there, Mike. How are you doing? 81 00:03:32,214 --> 00:03:34,756 -Good, good -I have not forgotten about Harrison. 82 00:03:34,839 --> 00:03:36,005 Jesus Christ. 83 00:03:36,089 --> 00:03:37,547 I just heard I'm gonna be at your table tonight. 84 00:03:37,631 --> 00:03:39,255 What, with an apple in your mouth 85 00:03:39,339 --> 00:03:41,255 and pineapple nipple rings like I requested? 86 00:03:41,339 --> 00:03:43,214 Ah, just kidding. Is Barbara gonna be with you? 87 00:03:43,297 --> 00:03:44,881 Oh, yes, sir. She's very excited about it. 88 00:03:44,964 --> 00:03:46,798 -Me too. Can't wait. See you later. -Okay. 89 00:03:46,881 --> 00:03:48,714 I want to hear more about Harrison. 90 00:03:48,798 --> 00:03:50,881 I wanna know about Barbara. How do you like that? 91 00:03:50,964 --> 00:03:53,172 -How does that make you feel? -Barbara's my wife. 92 00:03:53,255 --> 00:03:54,881 I didn't ask you. She is, though? 93 00:03:54,964 --> 00:03:56,881 -Yes, she is. -I didn't see that coming. 94 00:03:56,964 --> 00:03:59,881 -Who's Harrison? -No. Thank you for sharing... 95 00:03:59,964 --> 00:04:01,297 -about your wife. -It's a great story. 96 00:04:01,381 --> 00:04:03,047 Good luck. I hope she feels better. 97 00:04:03,130 --> 00:04:04,547 Judd Very Light Beer. 98 00:04:04,631 --> 00:04:08,172 It hurts less on the way in than it does on the way out. 99 00:04:08,255 --> 00:04:10,839 It feels like you're peeing actual fire. 100 00:04:10,923 --> 00:04:13,047 We're gonna see that guy's suicide, aren't we? 101 00:04:13,130 --> 00:04:15,339 Sure. But when it happens, we all tell HR 102 00:04:15,422 --> 00:04:17,464 -there were no warning signs. -Got it. 103 00:04:17,547 --> 00:04:19,005 I have the feeling that he might have spent 104 00:04:19,089 --> 00:04:22,047 the first couple of years of his life locked in a shed. 105 00:04:22,130 --> 00:04:23,631 Fudd! -Iris! 106 00:04:23,714 --> 00:04:25,047 Wait! Is this Harrison? 107 00:04:25,130 --> 00:04:26,339 You're in no physical danger. 108 00:04:26,422 --> 00:04:28,255 Well, not unless he buys me dinner first. 109 00:04:28,339 --> 00:04:30,964 Iris, he's making weird sexual violent innuendo 110 00:04:31,047 --> 00:04:32,631 -I don't fully understand. Fudd. 111 00:04:32,714 --> 00:04:34,714 Judd. You know my name is Judd. 112 00:04:34,798 --> 00:04:38,214 Silence, Fudd, you quivering sack of fraud. 113 00:04:38,297 --> 00:04:40,798 And you explain to me why the first-class hallway... 114 00:04:40,881 --> 00:04:43,130 -Can you stop this? -Absolutely. 115 00:04:43,214 --> 00:04:45,589 ...is teeming with tenth-class passengers 116 00:04:45,673 --> 00:04:47,255 -bleating about a dead pope? -Well? 117 00:04:47,339 --> 00:04:48,964 Now, when are comms back on? 118 00:04:49,047 --> 00:04:50,673 -Oh, you mean now? Well... 119 00:04:50,756 --> 00:04:53,422 I'm gonna need some information. Who-- Who is this guy? 120 00:04:53,506 --> 00:04:56,422 Harrison Ames is an awful and awfully litigious man 121 00:04:56,506 --> 00:04:58,756 with more trillions than you have nostrils. 122 00:04:59,839 --> 00:05:01,255 Three. He has three trillion. 123 00:05:01,339 --> 00:05:03,255 Because you're costing me money, you hairball. -Okay. 124 00:05:03,339 --> 00:05:05,130 Mr. Harrison Ames! 125 00:05:05,214 --> 00:05:06,464 Captain Ryan Clark. 126 00:05:06,547 --> 00:05:08,255 Well, that's quite a grip you got there, Captain. 127 00:05:08,339 --> 00:05:11,130 Well, I treat handshakes the way I treat my job. 128 00:05:11,214 --> 00:05:12,172 I like pressure. 129 00:05:12,255 --> 00:05:14,547 Oh, yes. Well, pressure... creates diamonds. 130 00:05:14,631 --> 00:05:16,881 Then consider this a 25-carat shake. 131 00:05:16,964 --> 00:05:19,464 -I like it. I like that. -I-- I also have manly hands. 132 00:05:19,547 --> 00:05:21,964 -Correct, Iris? -Absolutely. Like shovels. 133 00:05:22,047 --> 00:05:25,005 Tell him about my firm grip. Did you guys hear about my grip? 134 00:05:25,089 --> 00:05:26,881 -What? My... firm grip. 135 00:05:28,130 --> 00:05:30,047 First of all, Mr. Ames, what I want to say 136 00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:33,506 is that that nonsense in the hallway is unacceptable. 137 00:05:33,589 --> 00:05:35,381 And that stops right now. 138 00:05:35,464 --> 00:05:37,339 That is impressive. You see this, Fudd? 139 00:05:37,422 --> 00:05:38,964 -Judd. -This, Fudd, 140 00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:41,422 -is what power looks like. -Judd. 141 00:05:41,506 --> 00:05:44,339 -Tell me, Captain, do you golf? -Do I-- 142 00:05:44,422 --> 00:05:45,881 Does the pope shit in the woods? 143 00:05:45,964 --> 00:05:47,964 --I don't know. -Well, according to these guys, 144 00:05:48,047 --> 00:05:49,130 he probably does. 145 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:53,464 -I'm playing this bozo on the VR golf range. -Okay. 146 00:05:53,547 --> 00:05:55,589 Why don't you join us for a few cheeky holes? 147 00:05:55,673 --> 00:05:57,506 You know, my VR golf is very cool. 148 00:05:57,589 --> 00:05:59,964 You can tee off as young Judy Garland, 149 00:06:00,047 --> 00:06:01,255 and then sink your last putt 150 00:06:01,339 --> 00:06:03,214 -as old, drunk Judy Garland. -Mm-mm. Mm-mm-mm. 151 00:06:03,297 --> 00:06:06,005 Not that I have done that. I would-- I don't do that. 152 00:06:06,089 --> 00:06:07,255 He's totally done that, 153 00:06:07,339 --> 00:06:08,839 and I think that's the saddest thing I've ever heard. 154 00:06:08,923 --> 00:06:10,422 And I've heard whalesong. 155 00:06:10,506 --> 00:06:12,339 See you on the virtual green, Fudd. 156 00:06:12,422 --> 00:06:14,714 Not if I see you first, Farrison. 157 00:06:14,798 --> 00:06:17,464 -Oh, Jesus. -Oh, Fesus. 158 00:06:17,547 --> 00:06:18,756 We have great banter. 159 00:06:18,839 --> 00:06:20,923 No, we don't, you fucker! -See? 160 00:06:23,255 --> 00:06:25,339 We found a short window for a supply shuttle, 161 00:06:25,422 --> 00:06:27,964 and communications to Avenue 5 should be restored in ten. 162 00:06:28,047 --> 00:06:29,881 Oh, goody, goody, gum disease. 163 00:06:29,964 --> 00:06:31,381 Last ten minutes with no Judd. 164 00:06:31,464 --> 00:06:33,214 Oh, and I've wasted some of it saying this. 165 00:06:33,297 --> 00:06:34,381 Just a quick heads-up. 166 00:06:34,464 --> 00:06:37,047 There are some pretty gnarly protesters outside. 167 00:06:37,130 --> 00:06:39,047 Just in case you hear any effin' and jeffin'. 168 00:06:39,130 --> 00:06:41,547 Protesters? What are they, anti-jet propulsion? 169 00:06:41,631 --> 00:06:43,381 -No, anti-you. -Me? 170 00:06:43,464 --> 00:06:45,714 Queen of Death Rav Mulcair 171 00:06:45,798 --> 00:06:47,631 orders the murder of 500 Avenue 5 innocents. 172 00:06:47,714 --> 00:06:49,589 This should all be on Judd. He's in charge. 173 00:06:49,673 --> 00:06:51,589 I was just following-- 174 00:06:51,673 --> 00:06:55,798 Yes, yes, I know, but sometimes that is what people should do. 175 00:06:55,881 --> 00:06:57,798 I suppose you are Head of Mission Control. 176 00:06:59,130 --> 00:07:01,130 And I guess what, you know, they're saying... 177 00:07:01,214 --> 00:07:03,005 is that you're not. 178 00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:04,714 In control. Of the mission. 179 00:07:06,673 --> 00:07:08,506 Alan, could you possibly find me some coordinates 180 00:07:08,589 --> 00:07:10,464 as far away from Earth as possible? 181 00:07:10,547 --> 00:07:11,964 Fuck off there! 182 00:07:15,673 --> 00:07:18,464 Are you into spiritual epiphany and poop? 183 00:07:18,547 --> 00:07:22,255 Then come down to deck five. It's like Woodstock down there. 184 00:07:22,339 --> 00:07:23,756 But Catholic. 185 00:07:23,839 --> 00:07:25,297 Hey, honey. 186 00:07:25,381 --> 00:07:26,422 Wow, this is, uh-- 187 00:07:26,506 --> 00:07:28,297 Have you come to take a look at the Pope? 188 00:07:28,381 --> 00:07:31,714 Some people can't see it. But good-- good people can. 189 00:07:31,798 --> 00:07:34,631 And then, right below that, the nostrils, you look at 190 00:07:34,714 --> 00:07:37,255 where, like, the almost similar sized holes are. 191 00:07:37,339 --> 00:07:38,506 Honey... 192 00:07:40,172 --> 00:07:45,172 Honey, are you sure this is a good idea? You look tired. 193 00:07:45,255 --> 00:07:48,089 -No, I'm fine. I'm-- I'm happy. -No. 194 00:07:48,172 --> 00:07:50,798 I know what makes my Frankie happy. 195 00:07:50,881 --> 00:07:53,714 A little light jazz, maybe a nice box of raisins. 196 00:07:53,798 --> 00:07:56,798 Yeah, you have your thing. Why can't I have my thing? 197 00:07:56,881 --> 00:08:00,047 Because my thing is trying to get us all home alive, 198 00:08:00,130 --> 00:08:03,923 and your thing is proclaiming toilet miracles hither and yon. 199 00:08:04,005 --> 00:08:05,464 Hey! Don't belittle it. 200 00:08:05,547 --> 00:08:07,631 I am not belittling it, honey. 201 00:08:07,714 --> 00:08:09,464 It just is little! 202 00:08:09,547 --> 00:08:10,506 No, it's not. 203 00:08:10,589 --> 00:08:13,923 Hey John, did the pope heal your anxiety? 204 00:08:14,005 --> 00:08:17,464 Yeah! I took a Xanax and I prayed right here, 205 00:08:17,547 --> 00:08:19,839 and then, the Xanax totally worked. 206 00:08:19,923 --> 00:08:20,964 Yes, you see? 207 00:08:21,047 --> 00:08:22,798 -Sweetie-- -Shh. 208 00:08:22,881 --> 00:08:24,172 I can't listen to you now. 209 00:08:24,255 --> 00:08:27,047 I have to go help some people who are looking at the pope 210 00:08:27,130 --> 00:08:28,798 in the wrong direction. I have to... 211 00:08:32,422 --> 00:08:35,464 Golf. Yeah... The sport of kings. 212 00:08:35,547 --> 00:08:37,422 Uh, I think that's horse racing. 213 00:08:37,506 --> 00:08:39,005 Who's this little guy? 214 00:08:39,089 --> 00:08:41,881 Some physical manifestation of Judd's ego? 215 00:08:41,964 --> 00:08:42,964 It's Iris. 216 00:08:43,047 --> 00:08:44,464 That's what I said. Boom! 217 00:08:44,547 --> 00:08:46,214 Very good. 218 00:08:46,297 --> 00:08:48,422 I didn't think Judy Garland could get more tragic. 219 00:08:48,506 --> 00:08:51,089 Trust me, I can get a lot more tragic if I-- 220 00:08:51,172 --> 00:08:52,255 -Hey, guys. 221 00:08:52,339 --> 00:08:53,673 Comms are about to come back on. 222 00:08:53,756 --> 00:08:54,964 Ah, thank fuck. 223 00:08:55,047 --> 00:08:57,005 Are-- What are you? Are you a spider, Matt? 224 00:08:57,089 --> 00:08:58,547 Well, I admire their industry, 225 00:08:58,631 --> 00:09:01,089 and the fact that they play the long game. 226 00:09:01,172 --> 00:09:04,255 Hey, look at my abdominal ganglion! 227 00:09:05,422 --> 00:09:06,547 But there you go, 228 00:09:06,631 --> 00:09:08,547 messages from the past eight days coming through now. 229 00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:10,547 You got a message! 230 00:09:10,631 --> 00:09:11,714 About bloody time. 231 00:09:11,798 --> 00:09:14,214 MATT: Oh my god! Tobey Maguire died. 232 00:09:14,297 --> 00:09:16,381 Throat slit in a prison shower. 233 00:09:16,464 --> 00:09:19,047 Well, off I scuttle. 234 00:09:19,130 --> 00:09:20,714 Eight days, no comms, 235 00:09:20,798 --> 00:09:22,506 my companies are in the shitter! 236 00:09:22,589 --> 00:09:24,297 Look at my losses, Fudd! 237 00:09:24,381 --> 00:09:25,547 Iris. 238 00:09:25,631 --> 00:09:29,047 All right, cut the breeze. Trees, give us a second. 239 00:09:29,130 --> 00:09:31,506 HARRISON: Do you understand wealth? 240 00:09:31,589 --> 00:09:33,130 If this blackout has put me in the red, Fudd, 241 00:09:33,214 --> 00:09:36,339 I will come at you like a crocodile after a turkey leg! 242 00:09:36,422 --> 00:09:40,381 Well, I'll come after you like an even more killy animal. 243 00:09:40,464 --> 00:09:42,506 That was really bad. We need to work on your comebacks. 244 00:09:42,589 --> 00:09:44,964 Oh, god. -Problem? 245 00:09:45,047 --> 00:09:46,214 No, just, just... 246 00:09:46,297 --> 00:09:49,673 relishing the cold embrace of an empty inbox. 247 00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:52,756 -Oh, well. -"Oh, smell," more like. 248 00:09:52,839 --> 00:09:54,673 You know, you don't have to do comebacks with Ryan. 249 00:09:54,756 --> 00:09:57,089 You know, you don't have to do comebacks with me. 250 00:09:57,172 --> 00:09:58,047 Okay, give me that. 251 00:09:58,130 --> 00:10:00,089 Do you use alcohol to fill the chasm 252 00:10:00,172 --> 00:10:02,172 left by the absence of fatherly love? 253 00:10:02,255 --> 00:10:03,589 Then come to happy hour! 254 00:10:03,673 --> 00:10:06,297 Five p.m. at the Judd Sports Bar. 255 00:10:06,381 --> 00:10:08,673 Your dad won't be there. He never is. 256 00:10:13,130 --> 00:10:14,130 Oh, hey. 257 00:10:14,214 --> 00:10:17,005 You're the woman who saved us from space cancer. 258 00:10:17,089 --> 00:10:19,506 Yeah, and you're the comedian who, um... 259 00:10:19,589 --> 00:10:21,756 Yeah. I didn't think this would be your vibe. 260 00:10:21,839 --> 00:10:23,297 Oh, it isn't. No. Uh... 261 00:10:23,381 --> 00:10:25,923 The carpets are sticky and so are the people. 262 00:10:26,005 --> 00:10:28,964 It's just a quick cut through to engineering. 263 00:10:29,047 --> 00:10:31,589 So... How long exactly is it 264 00:10:31,673 --> 00:10:33,422 until everyone starts eating each other? 265 00:10:33,506 --> 00:10:34,964 No, we've got enough food for years, 266 00:10:35,047 --> 00:10:36,464 it's just we're out of flavorings. 267 00:10:36,547 --> 00:10:39,756 Oh, so... we're gonna not eat each other, 268 00:10:39,839 --> 00:10:41,673 but use each other as seasoning. 269 00:10:41,756 --> 00:10:44,673 Wow, that was... quantifiably funny. 270 00:10:44,756 --> 00:10:47,089 "Quantifiably funny." I should put that on my posters. 271 00:10:47,172 --> 00:10:48,381 Yeah, you should. 272 00:10:49,839 --> 00:10:51,756 Can I try some new material on you? 273 00:10:51,839 --> 00:10:53,381 Okay. Go. 274 00:10:54,923 --> 00:10:58,047 Uh, so I've got this bit about the papal poop. 275 00:10:58,130 --> 00:11:01,339 I thought, "Oh, the Catholic church had already gone to shit." 276 00:11:02,047 --> 00:11:03,589 Something like that. 277 00:11:03,673 --> 00:11:05,172 -Not funny? -Not listening. 278 00:11:05,255 --> 00:11:08,214 I gotta go. But this has been, um... 279 00:11:08,297 --> 00:11:11,047 -Fun. -Not fun, but... you know... 280 00:11:11,756 --> 00:11:12,964 -It happened. -Yeah. 281 00:11:13,047 --> 00:11:14,506 Tha-- Thanks, though, for the, uh... 282 00:11:14,589 --> 00:11:16,756 Let's do it again. -...quantifiable... 283 00:11:17,756 --> 00:11:19,381 Yeah. 284 00:11:19,464 --> 00:11:21,089 MALE REPORTER: With an emergency shuttle 285 00:11:21,172 --> 00:11:24,673 ready to take essential supplies and food flavorings to Avenue 5, 286 00:11:24,756 --> 00:11:27,172 all eyes are on Judd Mission Control. 287 00:11:27,255 --> 00:11:29,089 Well, this is nice. 288 00:11:29,172 --> 00:11:30,881 I'm amazed you wanted to come out. 289 00:11:30,964 --> 00:11:32,172 We thought, with everything going on, 290 00:11:32,255 --> 00:11:33,923 -that you might wanna-- We have a rule 291 00:11:34,005 --> 00:11:36,172 that we don't talk about work outside of work. 292 00:11:37,255 --> 00:11:38,756 Should we order? Get things over with? 293 00:11:38,839 --> 00:11:41,214 Not over with. Underway. 294 00:11:41,297 --> 00:11:42,631 Are we drinking? 295 00:11:42,714 --> 00:11:45,339 I might... treat myself to some water. 296 00:11:45,422 --> 00:11:47,506 Water on the rocks. You guys? 297 00:11:47,589 --> 00:11:48,839 -Uh, you choose. -The usual. 298 00:11:48,923 --> 00:11:51,547 Anger grows as mission director Rav Mulcair 299 00:11:51,631 --> 00:11:55,339 refuses to deny that 500 non-essential passengers 300 00:11:55,422 --> 00:11:57,464 will be blasted from the ship. 301 00:11:57,547 --> 00:11:59,422 Uh, I think I might get the jackal paws 302 00:11:59,506 --> 00:12:02,005 -and cucumber snow. Mm! 303 00:12:02,089 --> 00:12:04,881 I will get the wasp tapenade, 304 00:12:04,964 --> 00:12:06,464 owls in blankets, and some tree soup. 305 00:12:06,547 --> 00:12:09,714 With still no answers as to whether 500 are to die, 306 00:12:09,798 --> 00:12:14,464 we ask Rav Mulcair: does she really fucking care? 307 00:12:16,964 --> 00:12:18,631 Jim, cancel the water. 308 00:12:18,714 --> 00:12:21,047 I'll have that Mexican drink with the finger in it. 309 00:12:21,130 --> 00:12:22,297 And a notepad. 310 00:12:22,381 --> 00:12:24,798 Uh, no, this is fun time, not work time. 311 00:12:24,881 --> 00:12:26,881 Alan, all time is work time now. 312 00:12:26,964 --> 00:12:28,172 Actually, sod this lovely lunch. 313 00:12:28,255 --> 00:12:30,047 I'm checking on the supply shuttle. 314 00:12:30,130 --> 00:12:32,130 I'll get some rabbit nuggets to go. 315 00:12:32,214 --> 00:12:33,422 All right, let's try another one. 316 00:12:33,506 --> 00:12:35,964 I need real killer comebacks for this guy, Matt. 317 00:12:36,047 --> 00:12:38,923 -No-holds-barred type of stuff. -That's right. 318 00:12:39,005 --> 00:12:40,464 Okay, look at me. I'm Harrison. 319 00:12:40,547 --> 00:12:42,255 -Okay. -Right? 320 00:12:42,339 --> 00:12:45,172 Fudd. Is that your face? 321 00:12:45,255 --> 00:12:48,005 Or a rectal prolapse with a dye job? 322 00:12:49,172 --> 00:12:50,339 And your comeback is? 323 00:12:50,422 --> 00:12:51,756 -My face. -No. 324 00:12:51,839 --> 00:12:53,297 -No. -It's a rectal di-- 325 00:12:53,381 --> 00:12:54,881 -No. No. -Dye job. -Let's try it again. 326 00:12:54,964 --> 00:12:57,005 -Let's try it again. -All right, all right. -Okay. Okay. 327 00:12:58,005 --> 00:12:58,964 Fudd. 328 00:12:59,047 --> 00:13:00,839 -You have the voice-- -Voice. 329 00:13:00,923 --> 00:13:01,839 What? 330 00:13:01,923 --> 00:13:03,631 I was trying to anticipate 331 00:13:03,714 --> 00:13:05,798 -what Harrison might say. -Oh, that's good. 332 00:13:05,881 --> 00:13:07,714 Hello, Fudd. -Fudd. 333 00:13:07,798 --> 00:13:09,881 -You have the voice... -You have the voice... 334 00:13:09,964 --> 00:13:11,756 -...of a-- -...of a castrato. 335 00:13:11,839 --> 00:13:13,631 I did not anticipate that. 336 00:13:13,714 --> 00:13:17,923 You've been chemically castrated by your own effeminate glands. 337 00:13:18,005 --> 00:13:19,714 How did you know about that, Harrison? 338 00:13:19,798 --> 00:13:21,130 No. Again. 339 00:13:21,214 --> 00:13:23,089 -How did you know-- -Try not to affirm the things he says. 340 00:13:23,172 --> 00:13:24,297 Yeah. 341 00:13:24,381 --> 00:13:26,964 -All right, let me try one. -What did Iris suggest? 342 00:13:27,047 --> 00:13:30,881 "Hey, Harrison. Are you suffering from brain bleed? 343 00:13:30,964 --> 00:13:34,089 Don't worry. For you, that's a minor injury." 344 00:13:38,047 --> 00:13:42,422 Okay, I like that because it's suggesting his brain is small. 345 00:13:42,506 --> 00:13:44,589 - Yeah. -That's wonderful. That's very-- 346 00:13:44,673 --> 00:13:46,798 Right. I'll keep it quick, you horse's arsehole. 347 00:13:46,881 --> 00:13:49,130 Your brain is-- -Now, this period without comms has cost me-- 348 00:13:49,214 --> 00:13:52,464 -If I'm a horse-- -Shut your pussyhole and listen. This has cost me billions. 349 00:13:52,547 --> 00:13:54,714 And to prove that I'm very serious, Fudd, 350 00:13:54,798 --> 00:13:57,089 I've hired myself a paunchy white male to represent me. 351 00:13:57,172 --> 00:13:59,506 You have a bad brain. You are served. 352 00:13:59,589 --> 00:14:01,005 Legal hat on. 353 00:14:01,089 --> 00:14:03,339 -Legal hat off, great trip. -Thank you. 354 00:14:03,422 --> 00:14:06,381 Apart from the food flavors. It's a lot of banana. 355 00:14:06,464 --> 00:14:09,255 Yeah, that's enough. I will ruin you, Fudd. 356 00:14:09,339 --> 00:14:13,089 -Prepare for penury. ...small brain... 357 00:14:13,172 --> 00:14:14,297 Enjoying the cruise? 358 00:14:14,381 --> 00:14:16,255 I bet you would love the skating rink! 359 00:14:16,339 --> 00:14:18,756 Iris, give it to me straight. What does this mean? 360 00:14:18,839 --> 00:14:21,047 If Harrison sues, we get no rescue money. 361 00:14:21,130 --> 00:14:22,339 So... 362 00:14:22,422 --> 00:14:24,422 Why don't we have Ryan schmooze him at the Captain's Table 363 00:14:24,506 --> 00:14:27,047 -and talk him out of it. -Wait, okay. Wait. 364 00:14:29,756 --> 00:14:31,422 What if... 365 00:14:31,506 --> 00:14:37,589 we have Ryan invite Harrison to the Captain's Table 366 00:14:37,673 --> 00:14:40,047 -to schmooze him out of it. 367 00:14:42,047 --> 00:14:43,798 Yep. You fixed it. 368 00:14:46,005 --> 00:14:48,714 So, Doug, do you see the pope out there? 369 00:14:48,798 --> 00:14:50,923 -Or are you on the fence? -I'm on the fence. 370 00:14:51,005 --> 00:14:53,714 Hmm. Okay, well, this might focus you a little bit. 371 00:14:53,798 --> 00:14:55,589 Five hundred non-essential passengers 372 00:14:55,673 --> 00:14:58,464 are not going to be jettisoned out of the airlock. 373 00:14:58,547 --> 00:15:01,589 But, if they were, why are you essential? 374 00:15:02,714 --> 00:15:05,214 Fuck. Yeah, uh... 375 00:15:05,297 --> 00:15:07,381 I can... put a pencil in my teeth 376 00:15:07,464 --> 00:15:10,547 and flick with my finger and play the theme to Rawhide. 377 00:15:10,631 --> 00:15:13,756 Isn't it funny what our minds produce 378 00:15:13,839 --> 00:15:15,714 -when we're panicking? -That was just-- No, I-- 379 00:15:15,798 --> 00:15:17,839 And I'm also a generous and warm husband. 380 00:15:17,923 --> 00:15:19,464 I should've led with that. Shit, can I go back? 381 00:15:19,547 --> 00:15:20,881 No, we have more people to interview, 382 00:15:20,964 --> 00:15:22,798 but, uh... I loved that. You were great. 383 00:15:22,881 --> 00:15:24,631 Get outta here. 384 00:15:24,714 --> 00:15:27,631 Oh... Thank god there's not gonna be a cull 385 00:15:27,714 --> 00:15:30,339 'cause it would be bad news for, uh... 386 00:15:32,172 --> 00:15:33,923 Hey, Billie, comms are up. 387 00:15:34,005 --> 00:15:37,047 Yeah, I know. Just got the rescue plan. 388 00:15:37,130 --> 00:15:39,422 Waiting for messages from my husband and wife. 389 00:15:39,506 --> 00:15:42,089 I sent them a "can we try again" plea. 390 00:15:42,172 --> 00:15:44,589 Huh. Cool. Okay, so the plan. 391 00:15:44,673 --> 00:15:47,964 Firstly, Mission Control are gonna send up a huge docking station. 392 00:15:48,047 --> 00:15:49,047 -Oh... -What? 393 00:15:49,130 --> 00:15:51,547 Looks like the messages I sent them didn't go. 394 00:15:51,631 --> 00:15:53,881 -Oh, titting Jupiter. -Oh. 395 00:15:53,964 --> 00:15:57,381 I'm-- sorry about that. Um... So, the plan? 396 00:15:58,089 --> 00:15:59,297 What is this? 397 00:15:59,381 --> 00:16:02,589 This is, uh... a kind of floating airport terminal 398 00:16:02,673 --> 00:16:04,589 which they send into deep space. 399 00:16:04,673 --> 00:16:07,714 We dock, everybody gets in 500 shuttles, 400 00:16:07,798 --> 00:16:10,214 and we evac in a 48-hour window. 401 00:16:10,297 --> 00:16:12,631 Hmm. And go home. 402 00:16:12,714 --> 00:16:14,673 Can you remind me why I'd wanna go there? 403 00:16:14,756 --> 00:16:16,631 Right, well, there's-- there's a little bit more. 404 00:16:16,714 --> 00:16:19,756 Um... So, maybe you should sit down. 405 00:16:19,839 --> 00:16:22,255 -Hmm, here we go. - 406 00:16:23,631 --> 00:16:26,464 You remember, at the launch ceremony, 407 00:16:26,547 --> 00:16:29,756 that Joe paired your handprint with the emergency console. 408 00:16:29,839 --> 00:16:31,964 And he secretly paired his own. 409 00:16:32,047 --> 00:16:34,422 But they are now in a coffin with the rest of his corpse, 410 00:16:34,506 --> 00:16:37,631 leaving us with only one set of hands that can now do... 411 00:16:39,631 --> 00:16:40,839 ...that. 412 00:16:40,923 --> 00:16:42,381 What? You-- 413 00:16:46,547 --> 00:16:49,422 You mean you want me to dock the ship? Me? 414 00:16:49,506 --> 00:16:50,964 -And you can. You can learn. -But-- 415 00:16:51,047 --> 00:16:52,506 Because we have three and half years. 416 00:16:52,589 --> 00:16:53,673 Is that enough time? 417 00:16:53,756 --> 00:16:55,673 Well, it usually does take five. 418 00:16:55,756 --> 00:16:56,798 -Five years? -Mm-hmm. 419 00:16:56,881 --> 00:16:58,422 Right, well, you see, I noticed a difference 420 00:16:58,506 --> 00:16:59,589 between those two numbers. 421 00:16:59,673 --> 00:17:02,130 But there are some extremely gifted candidates 422 00:17:02,214 --> 00:17:04,130 that can do it in four. 423 00:17:04,214 --> 00:17:06,297 And these extremely gifted candidates, 424 00:17:06,381 --> 00:17:07,673 are they guys in their late 50s 425 00:17:07,756 --> 00:17:10,130 who can barely steer piss into a toilet bowl? 426 00:17:10,756 --> 00:17:12,130 You can do this. 427 00:17:13,255 --> 00:17:14,297 I can do this? 428 00:17:14,381 --> 00:17:15,464 You can. 429 00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:21,297 -I can do it. -Absolutely. 430 00:17:21,381 --> 00:17:23,130 You really think I can do it? 431 00:17:23,214 --> 00:17:24,589 No, you can't do it. Who am I kidding? 432 00:17:24,673 --> 00:17:26,047 Well, you just said that I could do it! 433 00:17:26,130 --> 00:17:28,214 Yes, I know, but I was trying to just boost your confidence. 434 00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:29,255 For three seconds. 435 00:17:29,339 --> 00:17:30,714 That's all I can muster, I'm really sorry. 436 00:17:30,798 --> 00:17:33,214 -Well, muster more. -Okay, look, Ryan... 437 00:17:33,297 --> 00:17:36,255 You can do this because, quite frankly, you have to. 438 00:17:36,339 --> 00:17:38,381 -But I can't. -But you will. 439 00:17:38,464 --> 00:17:39,464 -I will? -You will. 440 00:17:39,547 --> 00:17:40,881 Now, say it like you mean it. 441 00:17:40,964 --> 00:17:42,214 I don't mean it. Neither do you. 442 00:17:42,297 --> 00:17:43,631 Well, can't you just pretend? 443 00:17:47,631 --> 00:17:48,673 Yeah. I can do this. 444 00:17:48,756 --> 00:17:50,381 -Captain Ryan? 445 00:17:50,464 --> 00:17:52,714 You-- I'm sorry, you're, uh-- You're in the wrong place. 446 00:17:52,798 --> 00:17:54,756 The ice rink is on the next level. 447 00:17:54,839 --> 00:17:56,881 Oh, no, no, no. It's you that I'm looking for. 448 00:17:56,964 --> 00:17:58,214 I need to serve you with a notice 449 00:17:58,297 --> 00:18:00,881 for divorce proceedings. 450 00:18:00,964 --> 00:18:03,172 It's quite a working vacation for me. 451 00:18:03,255 --> 00:18:06,130 Yeah, I gotta get back to the rink. 452 00:18:09,547 --> 00:18:13,089 By rights, this should be the worst moment of my life. 453 00:18:13,172 --> 00:18:15,964 But now, I have to go up and host the Captain's Table 454 00:18:16,047 --> 00:18:18,673 and smile and be charming. 455 00:18:18,756 --> 00:18:21,464 So... that can be the worst moment of my life. 456 00:18:23,673 --> 00:18:26,005 -You can do--! -Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 457 00:18:27,714 --> 00:18:29,047 RAV MULCAIR: Alan, I need the plans 458 00:18:29,130 --> 00:18:30,506 for the emergency supply shuttle. 459 00:18:30,589 --> 00:18:31,714 Yes. 460 00:18:31,798 --> 00:18:33,923 We've just time with a one-hour window for a shuttle 461 00:18:34,005 --> 00:18:35,881 to bring medical supplies and food flavorings-- 462 00:18:35,964 --> 00:18:38,089 Fuck you, Rav! Fuck you, Rav! 463 00:18:38,172 --> 00:18:40,714 -Fuck you, Rav! Fuck you, Rav! -Fuck you, Rav! Fuck you, Rav! 464 00:18:47,339 --> 00:18:50,089 We need Judd here. He's the problem. Not me. 465 00:18:50,172 --> 00:18:52,714 His face is a giant blast shield, 466 00:18:52,798 --> 00:18:54,631 and I intend on cowering behind it. 467 00:18:54,714 --> 00:18:56,381 How? 468 00:18:56,464 --> 00:18:58,506 We bring him back on the supply shuttle. 469 00:18:59,964 --> 00:19:02,381 A lost wallet was found on level six, 470 00:19:02,464 --> 00:19:05,172 but money is essentially useless up here, 471 00:19:05,255 --> 00:19:07,214 so we're-- we're probably just gonna throw it out. 472 00:19:09,381 --> 00:19:11,047 He's here, he's hungry... 473 00:19:11,130 --> 00:19:12,422 Ooh! Oh, hello. 474 00:19:12,506 --> 00:19:15,464 -...he's in the third person. 475 00:19:15,547 --> 00:19:18,172 Putting the "captain" into "Captain's Table," 476 00:19:18,255 --> 00:19:20,964 -and-- and "stable," actually. -Yes, that's true. 477 00:19:21,047 --> 00:19:23,631 Wow. I think for the first time ever, 478 00:19:23,714 --> 00:19:24,714 we have some no-shows. 479 00:19:24,798 --> 00:19:26,756 Uh, best seats in the house! You guys... 480 00:19:26,839 --> 00:19:28,798 you guys wanna fight over it? 481 00:19:28,881 --> 00:19:30,172 No, I'm good over here. 482 00:19:30,255 --> 00:19:32,673 Having dinner with my father-- Don't know why I said that. 483 00:19:32,756 --> 00:19:34,464 Oh, hey, Billie. You wanna join us? 484 00:19:34,547 --> 00:19:39,673 Oh, uh... I would love to, but... No, I wouldn't. 485 00:19:39,756 --> 00:19:41,339 Hey! All right, well... 486 00:19:41,422 --> 00:19:44,089 All the people I wanna be with... right here. 487 00:19:44,172 --> 00:19:45,172 -Aww. Right? 488 00:19:45,255 --> 00:19:46,964 Best table on board! 489 00:19:47,047 --> 00:19:49,589 The real hot ticket is the fecal pope. 490 00:19:49,673 --> 00:19:52,422 It's The Shrining. That's why this place is so empty. 491 00:19:52,506 --> 00:19:54,339 Ryan, when are you gonna clear 492 00:19:54,422 --> 00:19:56,297 these gawping cockroaches from my corridor? 493 00:19:57,255 --> 00:19:58,839 It's at the top of my agenda. 494 00:19:58,923 --> 00:20:01,422 It's actually above the word "agenda." 495 00:20:01,506 --> 00:20:04,422 -Thank you. 496 00:20:04,506 --> 00:20:06,631 What's, like, your best joke? 497 00:20:06,714 --> 00:20:08,506 Uh, that's subjective, really. 498 00:20:08,589 --> 00:20:10,923 'Cause that's like asking you 499 00:20:11,005 --> 00:20:13,089 uh... what's your favorite part of the engine. 500 00:20:13,172 --> 00:20:14,714 -Belkron filter. -Sure. 501 00:20:14,798 --> 00:20:17,047 This is nice. For once, I'm not thinking about 502 00:20:17,130 --> 00:20:19,673 -being stuck up here for years. -Hmm. 503 00:20:19,756 --> 00:20:21,047 Although, now I am. 504 00:20:21,130 --> 00:20:22,714 Surrounded in shit. 505 00:20:22,798 --> 00:20:24,756 How do they say that in Swedish? 506 00:20:24,839 --> 00:20:27,089 Uh... 507 00:20:27,172 --> 00:20:29,255 MIA: Oh, it's a beautiful language. 508 00:20:29,798 --> 00:20:31,881 Mike, how's the fish? 509 00:20:31,964 --> 00:20:33,381 Mm. Yeah, it's good. 510 00:20:33,464 --> 00:20:35,047 Great. And the tomatoes? 511 00:20:35,130 --> 00:20:36,964 The tomatoes are very good. Very good. 512 00:20:37,047 --> 00:20:39,589 -Don't eat with your mouth full. Harrison. 513 00:20:40,673 --> 00:20:41,839 How are your tomatoes? 514 00:20:41,923 --> 00:20:44,130 Well, they're tomatoes. What can you say about tomatoes? 515 00:20:44,214 --> 00:20:45,464 Well, I said they were good. 516 00:20:45,547 --> 00:20:46,839 Yeah, Mike said they were good. 517 00:20:46,923 --> 00:20:48,255 Great, we get action replay. 518 00:20:48,339 --> 00:20:50,005 That's... I like that. 519 00:20:50,089 --> 00:20:52,255 Wow, Captain's Table is really, uh, killing it 520 00:20:52,339 --> 00:20:53,631 on the conversation front. 521 00:20:53,714 --> 00:20:56,547 Tomatoes. I can't wait to hear your opinion on the sweet corn. 522 00:20:56,631 --> 00:21:00,547 Ooh, the muscly toddler is giving us a challenge! 523 00:21:00,631 --> 00:21:01,631 Be more interesting, Captain. 524 00:21:01,714 --> 00:21:03,047 What's happening over there? 525 00:21:03,130 --> 00:21:04,589 I think Ryan is boring him to death. 526 00:21:04,673 --> 00:21:06,506 Boring is bad. 527 00:21:06,589 --> 00:21:09,214 But to death... To death is good. 528 00:21:09,297 --> 00:21:12,673 Great news. I just got out of a sexless marriage. 529 00:21:12,756 --> 00:21:14,381 Dry as a desert. 530 00:21:14,464 --> 00:21:15,964 Now I'm living on a flood plain 531 00:21:16,047 --> 00:21:18,005 with the hottest man in the galaxy. 532 00:21:18,089 --> 00:21:20,589 She's-- She's referring to my attractiveness 533 00:21:20,673 --> 00:21:22,589 -and not my temperature. -No, they know. 534 00:21:24,339 --> 00:21:26,547 That's fun-- 535 00:21:26,631 --> 00:21:28,130 I don't get a lot of comedy, 536 00:21:28,214 --> 00:21:31,255 but it's-- it's tragedy plus time, right? 537 00:21:31,339 --> 00:21:33,422 Yeah. But, you know... 538 00:21:33,506 --> 00:21:35,005 how much time is enough time? 539 00:21:35,089 --> 00:21:38,339 I don't know. How much time is enough time? 540 00:21:38,422 --> 00:21:40,214 There's no punchline to that one. 541 00:21:43,589 --> 00:21:46,297 So, Mike, Barbara, tell us about yourselves. 542 00:21:46,381 --> 00:21:47,422 Do you have kids? 543 00:21:47,506 --> 00:21:50,631 We-- We have a son, and it's-- it's real hard 544 00:21:50,714 --> 00:21:52,130 being away from him for so long. 545 00:21:52,214 --> 00:21:54,297 Aw, he must be missing you. 546 00:21:54,381 --> 00:21:55,381 He's in a coma. 547 00:21:55,464 --> 00:21:57,005 -What? -The fuck? 548 00:21:57,089 --> 00:21:59,172 Comas are all in the mind. Did you know that? 549 00:21:59,255 --> 00:22:02,464 You can literally bring yourself out of one. 550 00:22:02,547 --> 00:22:05,714 -Mm... -You left your son in a coma... 551 00:22:05,798 --> 00:22:06,839 to come on holiday? 552 00:22:06,923 --> 00:22:10,130 We didn't induce the coma. He hit the curb... 553 00:22:10,214 --> 00:22:11,172 Oh, god. 554 00:22:11,255 --> 00:22:13,047 -He was skateboard. -Skateboarding. 555 00:22:13,130 --> 00:22:14,172 Oh, that's cool. 556 00:22:14,255 --> 00:22:15,255 -Yeah. -What? 557 00:22:15,339 --> 00:22:17,798 He's been in a coma for 18 months. 558 00:22:17,881 --> 00:22:20,506 We thought we'd only be here for eight weeks. 559 00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:22,464 Are you fucking serious? 560 00:22:22,547 --> 00:22:23,923 Well, that's disrespectful. 561 00:22:24,005 --> 00:22:25,673 Yeah, well, you're the ones drinking Mai Tai 562 00:22:25,756 --> 00:22:28,547 while your son's tubed up like a potato clock. 563 00:22:28,631 --> 00:22:30,172 When I was younger, I used to wonder 564 00:22:30,255 --> 00:22:31,673 what it would be like to have a son, 565 00:22:31,756 --> 00:22:35,255 and then, suddenly, one day, I realized I am a son. 566 00:22:35,339 --> 00:22:37,881 Fuck's sake. "Captain's Table." 567 00:22:37,964 --> 00:22:40,631 It's got a captain and a table! And that's it. 568 00:22:40,714 --> 00:22:44,047 And as for this food, I can't touch this taste-free guano! 569 00:22:44,130 --> 00:22:47,297 Right! That's it! I am fucking done! 570 00:22:47,381 --> 00:22:48,839 I'm done! 571 00:22:48,923 --> 00:22:52,214 Fuck it! There are jauntier dinners on death row, 572 00:22:52,297 --> 00:22:54,547 and god forbid that anybody should actually ask 573 00:22:54,631 --> 00:22:56,381 -how I'm doing! -How are you doing? 574 00:22:59,881 --> 00:23:02,339 And you know what else is in a coma? My marriage. 575 00:23:02,422 --> 00:23:05,631 And I've just heard that they're gonna switch off life support. 576 00:23:06,631 --> 00:23:07,923 Thank you and good night. 577 00:23:09,047 --> 00:23:12,255 Are we fully certain he understood the term "schmooze?" 578 00:23:12,339 --> 00:23:14,839 Do you wanna go, uh, check out an old pope's face 579 00:23:14,923 --> 00:23:16,047 in some excrement? 580 00:23:16,130 --> 00:23:19,964 He pushed the table forward and he went backwards. 581 00:23:20,047 --> 00:23:22,339 Sure. I mean, you like a guy who disrespects furniture, 582 00:23:22,422 --> 00:23:24,422 -I can do that. -Opposite and equal. 583 00:23:24,506 --> 00:23:28,130 So, if we jettison some stuff, we could push forward, 584 00:23:28,214 --> 00:23:30,798 past the ring-- Oh! 585 00:23:30,881 --> 00:23:33,464 All right, our wonderful date continues. 586 00:23:36,047 --> 00:23:39,881 Hey. Nice job schmoozing, Captain Schmooze. 587 00:23:39,964 --> 00:23:41,714 What the hell was that? What are we gonna do? 588 00:23:41,798 --> 00:23:43,547 I know they're just turds, honey. 589 00:23:43,631 --> 00:23:46,089 -Please help me. -All right, baby. Okay. 590 00:23:46,172 --> 00:23:48,756 You're overheating. Just-- Let's go somewhere, 591 00:23:48,839 --> 00:23:50,172 and we'll take your shirt off. 592 00:23:50,255 --> 00:23:53,005 Hey, I see some familiar feces in the audience tonight. 593 00:23:53,089 --> 00:23:54,923 Oh! You're improvising crap jokes. 594 00:23:55,005 --> 00:23:56,255 That's very funny, I guess. 595 00:23:56,339 --> 00:23:58,255 Thank you, but you've been a shit audience. 596 00:23:58,339 --> 00:23:59,506 Okay, that was just the same joke. 597 00:23:59,589 --> 00:24:01,756 Captain. Captain, I think I got it. 598 00:24:01,839 --> 00:24:03,089 Look at them. 599 00:24:03,172 --> 00:24:05,422 They have so much hope on their faces. 600 00:24:05,506 --> 00:24:08,422 Oh, to be a happy cretin. 601 00:24:08,506 --> 00:24:10,172 We should throw Matt out of the airlock 602 00:24:10,255 --> 00:24:12,756 for making people panic that they're gonna be thrown out of the airlock. 603 00:24:12,839 --> 00:24:15,172 I think that she's implying that we dump these vagrants 604 00:24:15,255 --> 00:24:16,964 out of the airlock. Right, Iris? 605 00:24:17,047 --> 00:24:19,714 -No, I'm not implying that. -Well, I'll gladly lend a hand. 606 00:24:19,798 --> 00:24:21,089 Takes me back to my property days. 607 00:24:21,172 --> 00:24:23,589 Clearing squats... with a cricket bat. 608 00:24:23,673 --> 00:24:28,673 We shoot stuff out of the back, and that pushes us forward 609 00:24:28,756 --> 00:24:30,297 to break free from the shit ring. 610 00:24:30,381 --> 00:24:32,589 Correct. Plus, with the weight loss, 611 00:24:32,673 --> 00:24:34,255 we can dock in six months. 612 00:24:34,339 --> 00:24:36,923 I could hug you, but neither one of us wants that. 613 00:24:37,005 --> 00:24:39,506 Hey! Listen. Can I have your attention? 614 00:24:39,589 --> 00:24:43,047 Shuttle launch in five minutes and counting. 615 00:24:43,130 --> 00:24:45,005 -Uh, Rav. Going for a walk. 616 00:24:45,089 --> 00:24:46,547 ALAN: Rav, it's not safe outside. 617 00:24:46,631 --> 00:24:50,089 I walk where I please. I can walk on you if I want. 618 00:24:50,172 --> 00:24:54,214 My friends. I confess to you now that I see it. 619 00:24:54,297 --> 00:24:57,464 I see the importance of faith. 620 00:24:59,047 --> 00:25:01,506 -Faith in science. -Amen. 621 00:25:01,589 --> 00:25:03,422 Science does not need faith. It just is. 622 00:25:03,506 --> 00:25:04,798 -Rav! Not now! 623 00:25:04,881 --> 00:25:06,631 Also, a couple of protesters have breached the perimeter, 624 00:25:06,714 --> 00:25:08,964 so security would like to escort you to a safe place. 625 00:25:09,047 --> 00:25:12,297 Alan, I'm not going anywhere until I've launched the shuttle! 626 00:25:12,381 --> 00:25:13,964 -Rav? -Alan, I'm sorry! 627 00:25:14,047 --> 00:25:15,089 Newton's... 628 00:25:16,214 --> 00:25:18,047 -Third Law... -Mm-hmm! 629 00:25:18,130 --> 00:25:20,214 ...states, and I quote, 630 00:25:20,297 --> 00:25:22,631 that if you throw stuff outta the back of the ship, 631 00:25:22,714 --> 00:25:24,214 it pushes you forward. 632 00:25:24,881 --> 00:25:26,047 Ravioli, where you going? 633 00:25:26,130 --> 00:25:27,923 Alan, I'm going to bring Judd back myself. 634 00:25:28,005 --> 00:25:29,964 Access authorized. 635 00:25:30,047 --> 00:25:31,839 I'm getting on that shuttle. Goodbye! 636 00:25:31,923 --> 00:25:34,422 Don't do this! You'll miss your birthday! 637 00:25:34,506 --> 00:25:39,589 There's been talk about ejecting 500 people from the ship. 638 00:25:39,673 --> 00:25:40,714 That is the talk of Satan. 639 00:25:40,798 --> 00:25:43,214 Lord, cast him out! But not of the airlock! 640 00:25:43,297 --> 00:25:47,506 We eject the equivalent weight of 500 people, 641 00:25:47,589 --> 00:25:51,214 and we jettison that weight, pushing us forward 642 00:25:51,297 --> 00:25:53,130 within striking distance of Earth 643 00:25:53,214 --> 00:25:55,381 within six months! 644 00:25:56,839 --> 00:25:58,589 -Six months! -Hallelujah! 645 00:25:58,673 --> 00:26:00,547 -Amen! -Amen! 646 00:26:00,631 --> 00:26:02,005 A-fucking-men! 647 00:26:02,089 --> 00:26:04,547 -You're back in the black book! -Thank you, Harrison. 648 00:26:04,631 --> 00:26:05,839 -Get fucked! 649 00:26:05,923 --> 00:26:07,005 Out of the way, poor people. 650 00:26:07,089 --> 00:26:10,130 Hey! Hello, Mr. Schmooze. 651 00:26:10,214 --> 00:26:12,506 -And I'm saying that now unironically. 652 00:26:12,589 --> 00:26:17,381 So, non-essential items to the hallway for jettisoning. 653 00:26:17,464 --> 00:26:20,339 You can follow my lead. I overpacked. Come on. 654 00:26:20,422 --> 00:26:22,547 -Ask yourself: "Do I really need 655 00:26:22,631 --> 00:26:24,130 more than one pair of pants?" 656 00:26:24,214 --> 00:26:25,506 Well done, Captain. 657 00:26:26,297 --> 00:26:29,297 Thank you. Yep, I think it's... 658 00:26:29,381 --> 00:26:31,297 probably time for a drink. 659 00:26:32,047 --> 00:26:33,881 No time! We don't have time! 660 00:26:33,964 --> 00:26:36,047 That's not enough time to learn how to dock the ship! 661 00:26:36,130 --> 00:26:38,255 Even I couldn't learn it in six months, 662 00:26:38,339 --> 00:26:39,964 and I'm so much smarter than you. 663 00:26:40,047 --> 00:26:42,923 -That is not enough time to learn how to dock a ship-- -That's not enough time! 664 00:26:43,005 --> 00:26:43,881 -Six months? -No! 665 00:26:43,964 --> 00:26:45,631 -What am I thinking? -No! Oh my god! 666 00:26:45,714 --> 00:26:47,673 I need years! 667 00:26:49,047 --> 00:26:51,172 Hey. What's the matter? Why are you acting like 668 00:26:51,255 --> 00:26:52,923 a little foster child with a secret? 669 00:26:53,005 --> 00:26:56,547 Okay, the Captain now has only got six months to learn how to dock the ship. 670 00:26:56,631 --> 00:26:57,964 -That is not enough time. -What?! 671 00:26:58,047 --> 00:27:00,255 It took me longer than that to learn how to poach an egg. 672 00:27:00,339 --> 00:27:01,422 Well, let's just hope 673 00:27:01,506 --> 00:27:03,798 that you are really, really good with deadlines. 674 00:27:05,130 --> 00:27:07,172 The only thing I hear there is "dead." 675 00:27:07,255 --> 00:27:10,172 You know what? I take back what I said to you before. 676 00:27:10,255 --> 00:27:12,506 You're not Captain Schmooze. 677 00:27:12,589 --> 00:27:15,005 You're more like Captain Booze. 678 00:27:16,214 --> 00:27:17,798 -It's getting better. -Thank you. 679 00:27:17,881 --> 00:27:19,464 Really good. 680 00:27:19,547 --> 00:27:21,673 Seven... six... five... four... -What's in the seat?! 681 00:27:21,756 --> 00:27:23,798 -Uh, food flavorings. -Right. Won't be needing those. 682 00:27:23,881 --> 00:27:25,464 ...two... one. 683 00:27:25,547 --> 00:27:27,255 -Go, go, go, go, go, go! Launch.