1 00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:43,125 Time. 2 00:00:46,625 --> 00:00:47,625 Space. 3 00:00:49,375 --> 00:00:50,375 Reality. 4 00:00:53,208 --> 00:00:54,998 It's more than a linear path. 5 00:00:59,875 --> 00:01:04,535 It's a prism of endless possibility, 6 00:01:06,833 --> 00:01:10,333 where a single choice can branch out into infinite realities, 7 00:01:13,042 --> 00:01:16,042 creating alternate worlds from the ones you know. 8 00:01:19,917 --> 00:01:21,167 I am the Watcher. 9 00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:26,670 I am your guide through these vast new realities. 10 00:01:28,250 --> 00:01:31,920 Follow me and ponder the question... 11 00:01:35,333 --> 00:01:36,713 "What if?" 12 00:01:50,917 --> 00:01:52,787 For the win. This is it. 13 00:01:55,583 --> 00:01:57,213 And this is it, for the win. 14 00:01:58,792 --> 00:02:01,082 For the win. This is it. 15 00:02:02,167 --> 00:02:03,457 For the... 16 00:02:04,250 --> 00:02:07,250 Yes! First try. Jane, you owe me 50... 17 00:02:07,333 --> 00:02:09,083 Uh... Oh! Uh... 18 00:02:09,167 --> 00:02:10,877 Uh, Jane, Jane, Jane! 19 00:02:10,958 --> 00:02:12,708 It's beeping! It's doing the beeping! 20 00:02:14,125 --> 00:02:16,375 I need to talk to the director of S.H.I.E.L.D. 21 00:02:16,458 --> 00:02:17,958 Because, if my data is correct, 22 00:02:18,042 --> 00:02:19,712 I believe an alien invasion is imminent and... 23 00:02:19,792 --> 00:02:20,792 Hello? 24 00:02:22,250 --> 00:02:25,040 Two years ago, the same anomaly struck Star Alpha Icarus 25 00:02:25,125 --> 00:02:27,705 and the entire star dimmed and then, poof, disintegrated. 26 00:02:28,958 --> 00:02:32,458 Yes, I know this is the Parks Department, but isn't there something you can do? 27 00:02:32,542 --> 00:02:34,632 Talking about the end of the world, my dude. 28 00:02:39,792 --> 00:02:41,632 They're here. 29 00:02:41,708 --> 00:02:44,208 We're too late. The invasion has begun. 30 00:02:51,208 --> 00:02:52,208 - Holy moly! - Oh! 31 00:02:56,167 --> 00:02:57,747 Citizens of Midgard... 32 00:02:59,417 --> 00:03:02,707 ...your dull lives are about to come to an end. 33 00:03:02,792 --> 00:03:05,082 Prepare yourselves... 34 00:03:08,458 --> 00:03:11,208 for the party prince! 35 00:03:14,583 --> 00:03:17,583 This is gonna be awesome. Whoo! 36 00:03:17,667 --> 00:03:19,707 More than battles won or lost, 37 00:03:19,792 --> 00:03:22,582 it's relationships that truly define a hero. 38 00:03:22,667 --> 00:03:24,957 The people who shape them, their stories. 39 00:03:25,875 --> 00:03:29,495 Thor and Loki, a brotherhood so strong and pivotal, 40 00:03:29,583 --> 00:03:31,713 it would change the fate of a universe. 41 00:03:32,708 --> 00:03:36,078 Their childhood taught Thor many lessons. 42 00:03:37,292 --> 00:03:38,712 But in another universe, 43 00:03:38,792 --> 00:03:42,922 instead of raising the Jotunheim prince, Loki, as his own son, 44 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:45,330 Odin returned him to his people. 45 00:03:45,417 --> 00:03:49,327 Without his trickster brother to keep things, let's say, lively, 46 00:03:49,417 --> 00:03:52,457 Thor grew into a very different prince. 47 00:03:57,708 --> 00:04:00,078 Rest, my love. 48 00:04:00,167 --> 00:04:04,287 Allow the Odinsleep to restore your body and soul. 49 00:04:17,750 --> 00:04:20,290 He's asleep. And, uh... 50 00:04:20,375 --> 00:04:23,455 I'm off to my sister's to celebrate the solstice. 51 00:04:23,542 --> 00:04:27,042 Now, this is your first taste of kinghood, my prince. 52 00:04:27,125 --> 00:04:28,415 I expect you to study, 53 00:04:28,500 --> 00:04:31,000 read up on the Nine Realms that you will one day rule. 54 00:04:31,083 --> 00:04:32,213 Of course, Mother. 55 00:04:32,292 --> 00:04:34,212 - No parties. - Of course, Mother. 56 00:04:34,292 --> 00:04:36,502 Remember, Heimdall will be watching. 57 00:04:38,167 --> 00:04:40,287 Wait, what? You can't be serious. 58 00:04:40,375 --> 00:04:41,455 Behave. 59 00:04:48,458 --> 00:04:49,708 Oh, Heimdall, there you are. 60 00:04:50,250 --> 00:04:53,670 Just off to study. Books won't read themselves. 61 00:04:53,750 --> 00:04:55,040 But your mother said... 62 00:04:55,125 --> 00:04:56,745 Don't be such a wet blanket, Hogun. 63 00:04:56,833 --> 00:04:59,793 Oh, guys, stop. My father has ruled Asgard for centuries. 64 00:04:59,875 --> 00:05:02,665 And, look, the most interesting thing that he's ever done is fall asleep. 65 00:05:02,750 --> 00:05:06,750 He only cares about duty and blah-blah-blah-blah responsibility. 66 00:05:06,833 --> 00:05:09,963 Well, I'm not gonna be like him, right? The boring king? Uh-uh. 67 00:05:11,333 --> 00:05:16,673 But Heimdall sees all. If we try anything, he'll call Frigga. 68 00:05:16,750 --> 00:05:18,250 Oh, ye of little faith. 69 00:05:18,333 --> 00:05:20,503 We are going to the most backward, 70 00:05:20,583 --> 00:05:23,753 backwater planet that not even Heimdall pays attention to. 71 00:05:23,833 --> 00:05:25,253 Alert the realms. 72 00:05:26,750 --> 00:05:29,500 Party on Midgard! 73 00:05:29,583 --> 00:05:31,133 Yes! 74 00:05:31,208 --> 00:05:32,538 Huzzah! 75 00:05:32,625 --> 00:05:35,035 To Thor, the party prince! 76 00:05:35,125 --> 00:05:37,205 - Welcome! Welcome, friends. - Party prince! 77 00:05:37,292 --> 00:05:38,632 Enjoy the night. 78 00:05:38,708 --> 00:05:39,708 Thunder hug. 79 00:05:41,042 --> 00:05:43,382 Here, have a drink. It never runs out. 80 00:05:43,458 --> 00:05:47,288 You try to drink it all, but you can't because it's magic! Huzzah! 81 00:05:47,375 --> 00:05:51,125 Huzzah! Thor! Thor! Thor! Thor! Thor! 82 00:05:52,292 --> 00:05:54,962 Hollywood movies did not prepare me for this. 83 00:05:55,042 --> 00:05:58,382 Shouldn't there be more lasers? Probing? A flying cow? 84 00:05:58,458 --> 00:05:59,538 According to my data, 85 00:05:59,625 --> 00:06:02,785 the first extraterrestrial to arrive was... 86 00:06:02,875 --> 00:06:04,665 Him? 87 00:06:10,875 --> 00:06:13,375 Huh. I expected him to look more like... 88 00:06:13,458 --> 00:06:17,078 Like what? E.T.? And less like a hottie McScotty, beach body Ken, 89 00:06:17,167 --> 00:06:20,707 old-school Abercrombie catalog? I could go on. Let me. 90 00:06:20,792 --> 00:06:21,922 I'm gonna go talk to him. 91 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:23,750 I'm gonna make first contact with an alien. 92 00:06:23,833 --> 00:06:26,253 First? I think half the Strip beat you to it. 93 00:06:26,333 --> 00:06:27,923 You can make first contact with... 94 00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:30,330 I don't know, that guy. He looks like a loser. 95 00:06:30,417 --> 00:06:32,537 Ha! Big talk coming from a brunette. 96 00:06:33,500 --> 00:06:35,580 I'm going. How do I look? 97 00:06:35,667 --> 00:06:38,377 Completely unprepared for whatever happens next. 98 00:06:38,458 --> 00:06:39,878 Oh, do me, do me. 99 00:06:40,458 --> 00:06:44,248 Yes, you do me. You do me, and you too. 100 00:06:44,333 --> 00:06:47,293 Oh, you guys really get me. Yes? 101 00:06:47,875 --> 00:06:49,325 Huh? Oh. 102 00:06:49,417 --> 00:06:52,077 Oh, there you are, all the way down there. 103 00:06:52,167 --> 00:06:54,577 So tiny, I almost stood on you. How are you? 104 00:06:54,667 --> 00:06:57,127 I'm Dr. Jane Foster of Earth. 105 00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:59,378 Yeah, Thor, Crown Prince of Asgard. 106 00:06:59,458 --> 00:07:02,078 Uh, libations, crudité, baked goods? 107 00:07:02,167 --> 00:07:04,287 Mmm. Topaz, what do I always say? 108 00:07:04,375 --> 00:07:05,535 - I love cake. - Mmm. 109 00:07:05,833 --> 00:07:07,673 Wait, wait, wait. You're Thor? 110 00:07:07,750 --> 00:07:10,380 As in Thor, the Norse god of thunder? 111 00:07:10,458 --> 00:07:14,748 I don't know anything about horse gods, but I do know how to bring the thunder. 112 00:07:14,833 --> 00:07:17,423 Uh... Okay, moving on. 113 00:07:17,500 --> 00:07:20,420 Eighteen months ago, Alpha Star Icarus died. 114 00:07:20,500 --> 00:07:22,130 The astronomaly that preceded it... 115 00:07:22,208 --> 00:07:24,248 - ...happened again tonight. - Don't drink too much. 116 00:07:24,333 --> 00:07:26,043 - Or too little. - Hey, thunder boy. 117 00:07:26,125 --> 00:07:28,245 What I'm asking is, was that you? 118 00:07:28,333 --> 00:07:32,003 Yes, Alpha Star. Now, that was an excellent party. 119 00:07:32,083 --> 00:07:34,083 You know, we lost Fandral for three days. 120 00:07:34,167 --> 00:07:36,917 Found him in a barn, curled up next to a baby goat. 121 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:38,880 It was classic. Isn't that right, Fandral? 122 00:07:38,958 --> 00:07:40,878 I named him Gary. 123 00:07:40,958 --> 00:07:42,288 - Yeah, you did. - Yeah, goats! 124 00:07:42,375 --> 00:07:43,625 You killed a planet. 125 00:07:43,708 --> 00:07:46,418 Oh, what is that light box thing you've got there? 126 00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:49,290 Oh, it's magic. I love magic. Did you build this all by yourself? 127 00:07:49,375 --> 00:07:52,875 Excuse me? I happen to be an astrophysicist with multiple PhDs. 128 00:07:52,958 --> 00:07:56,378 You know, it would take a whole team of Asgardians to create such a thing. 129 00:07:56,458 --> 00:07:59,628 You must be a genius. You are a genius, aren't you? 130 00:07:59,708 --> 00:08:02,288 Well, I don't know about genius, but... 131 00:08:02,375 --> 00:08:03,875 And your eyes... 132 00:08:03,958 --> 00:08:07,328 Do all geniuses have such deep, dark eyes? 133 00:08:07,417 --> 00:08:10,627 It's like watching the birth of two stars on the edge of the galaxy. 134 00:08:10,708 --> 00:08:12,498 Oh. 135 00:08:14,208 --> 00:08:17,038 Well, it's happy hour. Want some half-price nachos? 136 00:08:17,125 --> 00:08:20,035 Okay, fine, Duck. But this is not a date. 137 00:08:20,125 --> 00:08:21,745 Let's just see where this evolves. 138 00:08:33,458 --> 00:08:34,708 Huh? 139 00:08:34,792 --> 00:08:35,882 Release the foam. 140 00:08:39,542 --> 00:08:41,252 Blow on these. 141 00:08:41,333 --> 00:08:42,833 Momma needs a brand-new eye. 142 00:08:51,208 --> 00:08:53,998 Volstagg has crashed! 143 00:08:54,083 --> 00:08:56,173 I now pronounce you Darcy and the Duck. 144 00:08:56,250 --> 00:08:57,290 Uh-huh 145 00:09:20,125 --> 00:09:21,535 Ah. 146 00:09:22,542 --> 00:09:24,082 Ah, phone. 147 00:09:31,667 --> 00:09:36,167 Ah, phone... Phone! Oh, shut up! 148 00:09:39,083 --> 00:09:40,423 Dr. Jane Foster? 149 00:09:40,500 --> 00:09:42,750 Coming. I'm coming. 150 00:09:42,833 --> 00:09:44,633 Dr. Jane Foster! 151 00:09:44,708 --> 00:09:46,378 Hold on. 152 00:09:46,458 --> 00:09:48,828 Dr. Jane Foster, this is S.H.I.E.L.D. 153 00:09:51,917 --> 00:09:53,287 If you do not answer, we will... 154 00:09:53,375 --> 00:09:54,785 Yes? 155 00:09:54,875 --> 00:09:55,875 We have her, ma'am. 156 00:09:55,958 --> 00:09:58,208 Maria Hill, Acting Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. 157 00:09:58,292 --> 00:09:59,672 - You need to come with us. - Uh... 158 00:10:00,958 --> 00:10:04,038 Can this wait until after breakfast? 'Cause... 159 00:10:04,125 --> 00:10:08,285 You were the first to warn us about this extraterrestrial threat. 160 00:10:08,375 --> 00:10:11,625 Now I hope you will be the key to eliminating it. 161 00:10:11,708 --> 00:10:14,708 "Threat"? Would you call him a threat, really? 162 00:10:14,792 --> 00:10:18,712 Do you wanna know why I am the Acting Director, Dr. Foster? 163 00:10:18,792 --> 00:10:20,042 Nope. 164 00:10:20,125 --> 00:10:24,745 Hey, Spicoli. This might be your party, but this isn't your planet. 165 00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:26,583 Before someone gets hurt, I need... 166 00:10:26,667 --> 00:10:27,667 Ball cannons! 167 00:10:31,375 --> 00:10:32,415 Oh! 168 00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:34,420 - Is he okay? - He's still unconscious. 169 00:10:36,083 --> 00:10:37,213 We getting food? 170 00:10:37,292 --> 00:10:38,832 Do you have company, Dr. Foster? 171 00:10:38,917 --> 00:10:40,457 Uh... A friend. 172 00:10:40,542 --> 00:10:43,212 Guys, guys, look. There's a cute little rabbit in the sink. 173 00:10:43,292 --> 00:10:46,082 Oh, look at this little rabbit. It's gorgeous. 174 00:10:46,167 --> 00:10:48,997 He's... a zoologist. I'll call you, okay? 175 00:10:51,958 --> 00:10:53,378 I told you everything. 176 00:10:53,458 --> 00:10:55,578 I followed the anomaly's origin to Vegas. 177 00:10:55,667 --> 00:10:57,077 And then what did you do? 178 00:10:57,167 --> 00:11:00,377 Um... Uh... 179 00:11:00,458 --> 00:11:02,828 Director, the party atmosphere seems to be spreading. 180 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:07,000 Canada, Mongolia, even Pennsylvania Dutch country. 181 00:11:07,083 --> 00:11:10,173 Led by the main instigator, Thor of Asgard, 182 00:11:10,250 --> 00:11:11,750 who's now taken to the skies. 183 00:11:11,833 --> 00:11:14,133 What? He left? 184 00:11:14,208 --> 00:11:17,078 Did he... Did he even leave a note at... 185 00:11:17,833 --> 00:11:21,043 I mean, did... Did he say where he was going? 186 00:11:21,125 --> 00:11:22,625 - Smooth. - Thanks. 187 00:11:22,708 --> 00:11:24,248 - Sarcasm. - Paris. 188 00:11:24,333 --> 00:11:28,253 One of his compatriots was, and I quote, "jonesing for crêpes." 189 00:11:28,333 --> 00:11:29,333 Ma'am... 190 00:11:30,792 --> 00:11:32,382 the last resort has arrived. 191 00:11:32,458 --> 00:11:35,498 Whoa, whoa. "Last resort" sounds very final. 192 00:11:35,583 --> 00:11:38,383 This is Earth's first encounter with alien life. 193 00:11:38,458 --> 00:11:41,328 How we respond today will set the tone for diplomatic relations 194 00:11:41,417 --> 00:11:43,327 between our worlds for generations. 195 00:11:43,417 --> 00:11:47,667 "Diplomatic relations"? Is that what the kids are calling it? 196 00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:48,880 You're wrong, Doctor. 197 00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:51,708 This isn't S.H.I.E.L.D.'s first alien rodeo. 198 00:11:52,667 --> 00:11:56,377 A beeper? My dad has one! He's a podiatrist. 199 00:11:56,458 --> 00:11:58,748 Wait, are you guys calling a podiatrist? 200 00:12:01,625 --> 00:12:02,625 It's done. 201 00:12:04,250 --> 00:12:07,210 Is it happening? Did it happen? What'd I miss? 202 00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:09,790 All right, here we go. Nestle on in. 203 00:12:09,875 --> 00:12:12,705 - Everyone say "waffles." I love that word. - Cheese. 204 00:12:12,792 --> 00:12:14,882 Waffles with maple syrup and whipped cream on top. 205 00:12:14,958 --> 00:12:15,958 - Thor! - Thor! 206 00:12:16,042 --> 00:12:17,422 He came! He's here! 207 00:12:17,917 --> 00:12:22,167 Oi! Where's that son of a witch, Thor Odinson? 208 00:12:23,208 --> 00:12:25,128 What did you say? 209 00:12:25,208 --> 00:12:30,078 Fandral, tell me, is that butt-ugly popsicle stick talking to me? 210 00:12:39,583 --> 00:12:41,503 - Bring it on in. - I can't believe you came! 211 00:12:41,583 --> 00:12:43,673 Loki, you are the absolute best! 212 00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:45,750 You're my brother from another mother, man. I mean that. 213 00:12:45,833 --> 00:12:47,633 - I mean it. - Brothers forever. 214 00:12:47,708 --> 00:12:49,538 Brothers forever! 215 00:12:49,625 --> 00:12:50,915 Forever! 216 00:12:52,292 --> 00:12:54,632 Wait, what's that boom? Did you boom? 217 00:12:54,708 --> 00:12:56,578 No, I didn't boom. Did you boom? You always boom. 218 00:12:56,667 --> 00:12:59,037 I never boom. I only boom in private. 219 00:12:59,125 --> 00:13:02,535 Oh, oh, oh. Loki, look, it's a shooting star. Make a wish, quick! 220 00:13:02,625 --> 00:13:05,285 Yes, yes, a shooting star. Yes, okay. I wish... I wish... 221 00:13:06,792 --> 00:13:09,422 I wish, I wish, I wish... I wish... 222 00:13:11,667 --> 00:13:13,827 - Uh... I've got it! - What is it? Tell me. 223 00:13:13,917 --> 00:13:16,627 I couldn't possibly tell you. It'll ruin the magic. 224 00:13:16,708 --> 00:13:17,708 Oh. 225 00:13:26,125 --> 00:13:29,035 Hey, Whitesnake. We need to chat. 226 00:13:29,125 --> 00:13:34,625 The name is Thor, with a "T" and an "R" and an "O" and a "H." 227 00:13:34,708 --> 00:13:35,828 But not in that order. 228 00:13:35,917 --> 00:13:38,577 - Quite some party you're throwing. - Isn't it the best? 229 00:13:38,667 --> 00:13:41,037 I mean, I'd hoped the Ice Bros would show, 230 00:13:41,125 --> 00:13:43,075 but Loki himself? Prince Loki? 231 00:13:43,167 --> 00:13:45,417 Are you kidding? I wouldn't miss this for the world. 232 00:13:45,500 --> 00:13:48,420 Listen, bud, clean up this mess and leave this planet. 233 00:13:48,500 --> 00:13:51,170 What? No, I like it here. Everyone likes me. 234 00:13:51,250 --> 00:13:53,500 We're having a great time... till you showed up. 235 00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:55,333 Party's over, pal. 236 00:13:55,417 --> 00:14:00,247 Mmm. Yeah, maybe here's a thought. Uh, how about you just buzz off? 237 00:14:04,750 --> 00:14:05,750 Oh! 238 00:14:11,417 --> 00:14:13,327 I wasn't asking, hotshot. 239 00:14:14,917 --> 00:14:18,627 You know, there's a Midgardian word for women like you. 240 00:14:20,375 --> 00:14:21,665 Party pooper. 241 00:14:22,500 --> 00:14:24,380 There. I said it. 242 00:14:24,458 --> 00:14:26,958 Okay, this one's for Fury. 243 00:14:31,417 --> 00:14:32,667 Now, for the rest of you... 244 00:14:40,917 --> 00:14:42,827 Have at you! 245 00:14:42,917 --> 00:14:45,127 Smooth move, bro. You just... 246 00:14:45,208 --> 00:14:46,828 Hammerang. Get it? 247 00:14:46,917 --> 00:14:49,207 Look, pal, I'm gonna count to three 248 00:14:49,292 --> 00:14:51,042 and you're gonna put the hammer down. 249 00:14:52,792 --> 00:14:55,132 Oh, here we go. Here we go. 250 00:14:58,500 --> 00:15:01,420 Hey, what did I tell you? Knock it off. 251 00:15:21,167 --> 00:15:22,747 Whoa. 252 00:15:23,542 --> 00:15:25,922 Hey, quit it. These are... 253 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:29,880 I don't know what these are. No one does. But... No! I said no! Stop. 254 00:15:29,958 --> 00:15:33,128 Oh, but I just have to do a little boop. 255 00:15:42,250 --> 00:15:45,710 Oh, no, your weird rocks have all fallen over. 256 00:15:45,792 --> 00:15:47,212 Boo-hoo-hoo-hoo. 257 00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,210 Ow! 258 00:16:02,583 --> 00:16:03,583 Party foul. 259 00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:09,500 Be right with you. Just one second. 260 00:16:10,125 --> 00:16:13,285 Ah, there it is. Whoo! Let's do this. 261 00:16:52,708 --> 00:16:54,828 You know, I'm starting to... 262 00:16:54,917 --> 00:16:56,957 Ow! Not the hair! 263 00:17:05,708 --> 00:17:07,458 Have at you! 264 00:17:42,375 --> 00:17:43,375 You know what you need? 265 00:17:43,458 --> 00:17:45,878 A stiff drink and two weeks in Hawaii? 266 00:17:45,958 --> 00:17:47,168 A time-out. 267 00:17:47,250 --> 00:17:50,460 My mother punished me with time-outs all the time, but I never learned a thing. 268 00:17:50,542 --> 00:17:54,752 But maybe they'll work on you because you're a party pooper. 269 00:17:54,833 --> 00:17:57,293 Hey, look, everyone! A party pooper. 270 00:17:57,375 --> 00:18:00,375 Pooper! Pooper! Pooper! 271 00:18:05,292 --> 00:18:07,132 Fury said you were the best. 272 00:18:07,208 --> 00:18:10,378 That your punch was equal to ten nuclear bombs. 273 00:18:10,458 --> 00:18:12,708 That your cat could devour whole armies. 274 00:18:12,792 --> 00:18:14,832 You've got a cat? What's its name? 275 00:18:14,917 --> 00:18:15,957 Goose. 276 00:18:16,042 --> 00:18:18,082 Oh, Top Gun! You're Maverick! 277 00:18:18,167 --> 00:18:20,497 Is your ego writing checks that your skills can't cash? 278 00:18:20,583 --> 00:18:21,673 - No. - Yes. 279 00:18:22,333 --> 00:18:24,753 - Who are you? - Darcy. Big fan. 280 00:18:24,833 --> 00:18:27,463 By the way, totally thought you were gonna be a dude captain. 281 00:18:27,542 --> 00:18:29,462 But look at you, all not. 282 00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:32,752 If I exert my full powers, I blow a crater in this planet. 283 00:18:32,833 --> 00:18:36,043 Taking down Kappa Kappa frat freak won't be worth the fatalities. 284 00:18:36,125 --> 00:18:37,915 Ooh. What about South Dakota? 285 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,630 Or North Dakota? 286 00:18:39,708 --> 00:18:42,418 Uh... I need to get this. 287 00:18:42,500 --> 00:18:45,500 So, uh, do you need an intern? Cat wrangler? 288 00:18:45,583 --> 00:18:47,753 Darcy, right now, you're running at an eight, 289 00:18:47,833 --> 00:18:49,673 and I need you to take it down to a four. 290 00:18:49,750 --> 00:18:51,130 Okay? 291 00:18:51,208 --> 00:18:52,378 - Hello? - Jane! 292 00:18:52,458 --> 00:18:54,288 - Hey! - When can I see you again? 293 00:18:54,375 --> 00:18:57,415 You're the nicest, prettiest Midgardian woman I've ever met. 294 00:18:57,500 --> 00:18:59,290 How many Earth women have you met? 295 00:18:59,375 --> 00:19:01,285 Uh, two. But the other one hit me with a bridge 296 00:19:01,375 --> 00:19:02,995 and, well, that hurt more than my face. 297 00:19:05,417 --> 00:19:07,497 Thor, be honest with me. 298 00:19:07,583 --> 00:19:11,293 At your last party on Alpha Star, did you really destroy that planet? 299 00:19:11,375 --> 00:19:14,325 No, no, it was more of a meteor anyway, not a planet. 300 00:19:14,417 --> 00:19:17,287 And it was burning apart, so we just kinda helped it along and... 301 00:19:17,375 --> 00:19:18,495 So no one got hurt? 302 00:19:18,583 --> 00:19:19,883 - Of course not. - Dr. Foster? 303 00:19:19,958 --> 00:19:22,208 Even the baby goat, Gary, got home safely. 304 00:19:22,292 --> 00:19:23,712 - Eventually. - Dr. Foster. 305 00:19:23,792 --> 00:19:25,752 Uh, I gotta go. Love you. Oh. 306 00:19:25,833 --> 00:19:27,463 I mean, bye. 307 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,170 What were we talking about? 308 00:19:30,250 --> 00:19:32,040 Look, all I'm saying is, 309 00:19:32,125 --> 00:19:34,705 no one would notice if you blew up a Dakota. 310 00:19:34,792 --> 00:19:36,212 Honestly, I can't tell them apart. 311 00:19:36,292 --> 00:19:37,832 South Dakota is on the bottom. 312 00:19:37,917 --> 00:19:39,127 It's not a bad idea. 313 00:19:39,208 --> 00:19:40,998 The Mojave Desert could withstand the hit. 314 00:19:41,083 --> 00:19:43,713 Lure him to Siberia and then go kaboom on his ass. 315 00:19:45,125 --> 00:19:47,955 You're not serious. We're not gonna kaboom him. 316 00:19:48,042 --> 00:19:49,632 We're talking about the fate of the planet. 317 00:19:49,708 --> 00:19:52,918 He's a lughead, sure, and far from the brightest crayon in the box. 318 00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:57,250 But this plan is way over the top, and I refuse to let it happen. 319 00:19:57,333 --> 00:20:00,463 Thank you for your expertise, Dr. Foster, 320 00:20:00,542 --> 00:20:03,332 but your assistance is no longer required. 321 00:20:06,458 --> 00:20:09,538 Damn! There goes my internship with the Galactic Queen Bee. 322 00:20:09,625 --> 00:20:14,575 Well, look who came waddling back. Mrs. the Duck. 323 00:20:14,667 --> 00:20:17,037 - Not now, Howard! - Hello, Thor? 324 00:20:17,125 --> 00:20:18,875 - Who's this? - It's Jane. Can you hear me? 325 00:20:18,958 --> 00:20:22,248 Wait. Is this the girl? Thor's new sweet lady? Hello. 326 00:20:22,333 --> 00:20:23,383 Is Thor there? 327 00:20:23,458 --> 00:20:27,248 Late-night Chinese is the best. Oh, I love food. 328 00:20:27,333 --> 00:20:30,213 Loki, get your blue butt over here. You have to try these dumplings. 329 00:20:30,292 --> 00:20:33,462 Hey, Earth girl. You haven't got a friend, have you? 330 00:20:33,542 --> 00:20:35,332 You know, we could double date. 331 00:20:35,417 --> 00:20:38,077 Ugh! Will you just put him on the phone? 332 00:20:38,167 --> 00:20:40,497 Oh, don't get your knickers in a twist. He's right here... Oh! 333 00:20:44,167 --> 00:20:46,167 Oh. Right. 334 00:20:46,250 --> 00:20:47,420 Hello? Loki? 335 00:20:48,042 --> 00:20:51,132 Hey, hey. Watch the feathers. 336 00:20:51,208 --> 00:20:53,668 - Too bad we can't call his mom. - What? 337 00:20:53,750 --> 00:20:54,880 That's what always happens. 338 00:20:54,958 --> 00:20:57,168 Teenagers throw a party, it gets out of control... 339 00:20:57,250 --> 00:20:59,170 - Oh, you really are a genius. - Whoa. 340 00:20:59,250 --> 00:21:02,500 It's really starting to look that way, isn't it? What'd I say? 341 00:21:02,583 --> 00:21:05,043 If there's a Thor and a Loki, 342 00:21:05,125 --> 00:21:09,535 then there must be an Odin and a Frigga and a Heimdall! 343 00:21:09,625 --> 00:21:10,785 Uh, he-man-who-now? 344 00:21:15,708 --> 00:21:20,288 You know, I've got a crown too, and we both like fire, right? 345 00:21:20,375 --> 00:21:22,575 Come on. Let's see you turn up the heat on this thing. 346 00:21:22,667 --> 00:21:25,707 Uh... Ooh, look at the time. 347 00:21:30,333 --> 00:21:33,423 How low can I go? 348 00:21:40,083 --> 00:21:42,963 Everyone! Watch me slide down that pointy thing. 349 00:21:46,125 --> 00:21:47,125 And away! 350 00:21:49,417 --> 00:21:51,247 Whoo! 351 00:22:02,542 --> 00:22:06,962 This one goes here. Green in the thing. Okay, sweet. Good to go. 352 00:22:07,042 --> 00:22:08,132 Selvig, thank you. 353 00:22:08,208 --> 00:22:11,328 Re-aligning the satellites, magnifying the signal. 354 00:22:13,458 --> 00:22:15,288 Heimdall! 355 00:22:17,333 --> 00:22:20,253 - It's not working. - Okay, okay. My turn. I got this. 356 00:22:20,333 --> 00:22:23,673 Would the owner of the navy blue Prius... 357 00:22:38,208 --> 00:22:41,708 Hi. So, uh, about Thor... 358 00:22:48,083 --> 00:22:51,043 Not cool. I actually felt that one. 359 00:22:56,833 --> 00:22:58,883 - We're in position. - Arm the nukes. 360 00:22:58,958 --> 00:23:00,998 What? But I thought she was the nuke. 361 00:23:01,083 --> 00:23:03,133 Just in case she gets distracted by a cat. 362 00:23:05,167 --> 00:23:09,957 Uh... Hello, Mrs. Odinwife? 363 00:23:10,667 --> 00:23:12,417 Uh, is that Chardonnay? 364 00:23:12,500 --> 00:23:15,290 A varietal, yes. Can I help you? 365 00:23:15,375 --> 00:23:18,035 Why do you insist on crushing my mellow? 366 00:23:18,125 --> 00:23:20,535 Huh? Loosen up. Have fun. Smile a little. 367 00:23:21,792 --> 00:23:23,212 Ready to fire on your command. 368 00:23:23,292 --> 00:23:25,172 Fire in five... 369 00:23:25,250 --> 00:23:28,580 I gave you a warning. Hell, I gave you a warning punch. 370 00:23:28,667 --> 00:23:31,327 - Four. - It's Thor. He's in trouble. 371 00:23:33,333 --> 00:23:35,083 - Three. - He's on Earth. 372 00:23:36,083 --> 00:23:37,633 Two. 373 00:23:38,958 --> 00:23:40,878 - What about Captain Marvel? - She'll be fine. 374 00:23:40,958 --> 00:23:42,458 One. 375 00:23:45,625 --> 00:23:50,665 Thor, Crown Prince of Asgard, only son of Odin, what are you doing? 376 00:23:50,750 --> 00:23:52,080 - Mother! - Mother? 377 00:23:52,167 --> 00:23:53,207 Mother? 378 00:23:53,292 --> 00:23:54,632 What are you doing here? 379 00:23:54,708 --> 00:23:57,628 You must be using a lot of dark magic just to check in on me. 380 00:23:57,708 --> 00:24:01,168 Ugh, I had a visitor. She's worried about you. 381 00:24:01,250 --> 00:24:03,630 Wha... Jane sold me out? 382 00:24:03,708 --> 00:24:05,538 She said you were on Midgard. 383 00:24:05,625 --> 00:24:07,325 Well, she is mistaken. 384 00:24:07,417 --> 00:24:10,247 I'm obviously in my room, studying. 385 00:24:13,792 --> 00:24:17,382 Do not tell falsehoods to your mother. 386 00:24:17,458 --> 00:24:21,578 Oh, you mean Earth. Sorry, I misunderstood. 387 00:24:21,667 --> 00:24:24,787 The locals call it that. Yes, right. Sorry. 388 00:24:24,875 --> 00:24:26,415 Confused there for a moment. 389 00:24:26,500 --> 00:24:30,920 Me and my study group came down here for a cultural exchange. 390 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:33,380 "Cultural exchange." 391 00:24:33,458 --> 00:24:35,708 You know us. We're warriors for knowledge. 392 00:24:35,792 --> 00:24:39,422 Hmm. Really? Then this I have to see for myself. 393 00:24:39,500 --> 00:24:41,380 I'm cutting my trip short. 394 00:24:41,458 --> 00:24:42,748 You're coming here? 395 00:24:42,833 --> 00:24:48,463 And, my sweet son, I expect to see your full syllabus when I arrive. 396 00:24:49,833 --> 00:24:51,213 Now or never, Hill. 397 00:24:51,833 --> 00:24:53,463 Stand down. We're done here. 398 00:24:53,542 --> 00:24:56,172 We never get to fire the nukes. 399 00:24:56,250 --> 00:24:57,960 I almost feel bad for you, Blondie. 400 00:24:58,042 --> 00:25:00,962 Please, you must help me. My mother is coming. 401 00:25:01,042 --> 00:25:04,712 My suggestion? Start in the corners, clean your way outward. 402 00:25:07,083 --> 00:25:08,173 Corners, corners... 403 00:25:08,250 --> 00:25:10,290 But it's a sphere. 404 00:25:11,250 --> 00:25:15,880 Ugh. Excuse me, ladies. I'm sorry, but I must leave early. Again. 405 00:25:17,583 --> 00:25:19,963 Loki, my brother. I require your assistance. 406 00:25:20,042 --> 00:25:22,292 Ah, one step ahead of you, Tiny Thunder. 407 00:25:22,375 --> 00:25:25,705 My bro's trying this thing in St. Louis. Saint... Is it "Louie"? 408 00:25:25,792 --> 00:25:27,382 Anyway, we're about to make 409 00:25:27,458 --> 00:25:29,918 this universe's greatest slingshot. 410 00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:32,040 Try to enjoy the rest of your time here. 411 00:25:32,125 --> 00:25:34,705 See you in another thousand years. Heimdall. 412 00:25:36,250 --> 00:25:40,210 No more slingshots. No more destruction. We need to clean this mess up and go home. 413 00:25:42,167 --> 00:25:43,667 Ugh! Now! 414 00:25:44,833 --> 00:25:47,963 Ha! Nice one. Almost fell for it. 415 00:25:48,042 --> 00:25:50,882 I'm not joking. My mother is coming. 416 00:25:57,125 --> 00:25:58,125 Hmm. 417 00:25:58,208 --> 00:25:59,708 But she's not my mother. 418 00:25:59,792 --> 00:26:02,292 You know, I'm your brother from another mother, remember? 419 00:26:02,375 --> 00:26:04,825 Come on, Ice Bros, let's go. 420 00:26:04,917 --> 00:26:06,747 Wait. You can't leave. Look at this place. 421 00:26:06,833 --> 00:26:09,333 We have a duty to this planet. You need to clean it up. 422 00:26:09,417 --> 00:26:12,127 "Duty, clean"? Ugh, you sound like Odin. 423 00:26:12,208 --> 00:26:13,288 What? 424 00:26:13,375 --> 00:26:14,705 Ice Men, let's bounce. 425 00:26:18,375 --> 00:26:20,125 All right, listen, party's over. 426 00:26:20,208 --> 00:26:23,208 You don't have to go home, but you can't stay. 427 00:26:23,292 --> 00:26:25,172 Wait, where you going? Come back. 428 00:26:25,250 --> 00:26:26,380 No, no, no, no, no. 429 00:26:26,458 --> 00:26:29,458 You do have to stay here, and we need to clean up. 430 00:26:29,542 --> 00:26:31,752 Look who's pooping the party now. 431 00:26:31,833 --> 00:26:34,383 It is you! You are pooping the party. 432 00:26:34,458 --> 00:26:35,828 Where you going? Come back! 433 00:26:35,917 --> 00:26:38,207 Let's go, Topaz. We shall ride like the wind. 434 00:26:38,292 --> 00:26:39,582 - Please! Wait. - Loser. 435 00:26:39,667 --> 00:26:41,287 And we're keeping the scoot-scoots. 436 00:26:41,375 --> 00:26:44,625 Guys, please. Help, I... You. How about you? 437 00:26:44,708 --> 00:26:47,958 Uh... I think I hear my dad calling. Good luck. 438 00:26:53,292 --> 00:26:57,542 People. Beings. Please, everyone, you must stay and help. 439 00:27:00,417 --> 00:27:02,957 Allfather, give me strength. 440 00:27:08,375 --> 00:27:10,325 You will listen to me. 441 00:27:12,292 --> 00:27:14,132 My mother is coming. 442 00:27:14,208 --> 00:27:17,998 - Frigga? - And she is not happy. 443 00:27:18,083 --> 00:27:20,213 Like, at all. 444 00:27:20,292 --> 00:27:21,582 She's really mad. 445 00:27:38,125 --> 00:27:39,205 Yeah, baby. 446 00:28:02,167 --> 00:28:03,167 Thor. 447 00:28:05,250 --> 00:28:09,080 Oh, hello, Mother. Good to see you. Welcome to our study group. 448 00:28:09,167 --> 00:28:10,997 Uh... 449 00:28:11,083 --> 00:28:13,003 Everyone say hello to Mother. 450 00:28:13,083 --> 00:28:14,713 Hello, Mother Frigga. 451 00:28:14,792 --> 00:28:17,502 And to end our studies, what do we always say, class? 452 00:28:17,583 --> 00:28:19,503 Learning is magic. 453 00:28:20,792 --> 00:28:24,382 See? I told you I was on an educational and cultural exchange. 454 00:28:24,458 --> 00:28:27,538 Did you know that Midgard is the birthplace of the Snuggie? 455 00:28:29,875 --> 00:28:32,075 Mother, you doubt? 456 00:28:34,125 --> 00:28:36,375 But look at all this learning, huh? 457 00:28:43,625 --> 00:28:46,875 Thor, here's the information you requested on human civilizations. 458 00:28:46,958 --> 00:28:50,878 And I loaded a few documentaries, PBS specials, NPR podcasts. 459 00:28:50,958 --> 00:28:52,628 I'll call you next week to discuss it. 460 00:28:52,708 --> 00:28:58,288 So tiny yet contains so, so much. Thank you. 461 00:28:58,375 --> 00:29:00,495 You must be Frigga. I'm Captain Marvel. 462 00:29:00,583 --> 00:29:05,293 I know who you are. Thank you for helping educate my son. 463 00:29:05,375 --> 00:29:06,995 - Let's go, darling. - Wait. 464 00:29:07,083 --> 00:29:09,173 Almost forgot. 465 00:29:12,292 --> 00:29:14,042 Uh... 466 00:29:14,125 --> 00:29:15,455 Mother, I can explain. 467 00:29:25,125 --> 00:29:26,785 - Hi. - Thanks. 468 00:29:26,875 --> 00:29:28,495 You called my mother on me. 469 00:29:28,583 --> 00:29:30,173 That wasn't a cool thing to do, 470 00:29:30,250 --> 00:29:33,080 but it was the right thing. So, thank you. 471 00:29:34,667 --> 00:29:35,917 You're welcome. 472 00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:38,420 I'll call you? Cools? 473 00:29:38,500 --> 00:29:40,460 No, it is not "cools." 474 00:29:40,542 --> 00:29:41,752 No? 475 00:29:41,833 --> 00:29:44,793 But I thought we had something. I really like you, Jane. 476 00:29:44,875 --> 00:29:47,955 And not just because you're a genius. You're also very attractive and... 477 00:29:48,542 --> 00:29:50,212 Well, then, ask me out on a date. 478 00:29:50,292 --> 00:29:51,712 Oh. 479 00:29:51,792 --> 00:29:55,632 Jane Foster, it would be my honor to take you on a date. 480 00:29:55,708 --> 00:30:00,788 Before you answer, let me say that I know a whole planet full of unicorns. 481 00:30:00,875 --> 00:30:02,535 Even the waiters are unicorns... 482 00:30:02,625 --> 00:30:05,415 - It's wonderful. - Sounds delightful. Pick me up at 8:00? 483 00:30:16,333 --> 00:30:19,753 A world restored, love blossoming. 484 00:30:19,833 --> 00:30:24,003 As children, both human and Asgardian, say, 485 00:30:24,083 --> 00:30:27,923 together, they lived happily ever after. 486 00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:30,000 Wait, what? 487 00:30:30,083 --> 00:30:31,083 Huh? 488 00:30:35,375 --> 00:30:39,705 Oh, dear. Perhaps I spoke too soon.