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‪NETFLIX 原創影集

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{\an8}‪（@迪薇威舍庫瑪
‪瘋狂電路：《穠纖合度》）

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{\an8}‪奧立佛！你在做什麼？

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{\an8}‪-沒什麼，寶貝
‪-我真是抱歉

5
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‪很抱歉我出現在妳們精采影片的背景

6
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‪我毀了影片嗎？

7
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‪我不知道

8
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‪奧立佛，你覺得她穠纖合度的身材
‪毀了影片嗎？

9
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‪-感覺這個問題是陷阱
‪-沒錯

10
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‪好，現在拍完那個亂七八糟的東西了

11
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‪我想你們這些孩子該回家了

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‪迪薇需要替菜園除草

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‪爛掉的番茄會引來老鼠

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‪但那是爸爸的菜園
‪為什麼現在必須由我負責？

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‪我可以負責

16
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‪只要妳不介意接手我的皮膚科診所

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‪這樣我們兩個也算工作平等了

18
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‪好，但是可以給我和朋友
‪五分鐘隱私嗎？

19
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‪三分鐘

20
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‪而且男孩必須馬上走

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‪我可以把沒喝完的汽水帶走嗎？

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‪拿著山露汽水離開

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‪-晚點見，我的愛
‪-好

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‪-妳得到幾個讚了？
‪-目前只有兩個

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‪一個是艾莉諾的爸爸，另一個是…

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‪艾莉諾爸爸的牙醫診所

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‪很合理，他試著討我歡心

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‪這樣我會對我的繼母好一點

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‪不可能的，雪倫，妳太無趣了

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‪派克斯頓的反應呢？他肯定會按讚

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‪不，還沒有

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‪事實就是派克斯頓和迪薇
‪根本就沒有什麼

33
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‪如果我們沒事了
‪明天在你的車庫見好嗎？

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‪事實上，我覺得這不再是好主意了

35
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‪現在變得很怪，妳懂吧？

36
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‪這就是她想上傳性感影片的原因…

37
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‪要是派克斯頓喜歡影片
‪也許就會喜歡她

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‪等等，我不常看到你們在學校講話

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‪他只是拿妳當床伴
‪但公開場合就無視妳嗎？

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‪那太噁心了

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‪對，性愛

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‪不，我們的關係很穩定，別擔心

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‪他把妳介紹給他的朋友了嗎？

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‪-沒有，但是…
‪-卑鄙的傢伙！

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‪-他覺得妳丟臉
‪-妳這樣講不太對

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‪相信我，他覺得丟臉

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‪所以我討厭所有的男人

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‪除了妳的男朋友，亞歷士戈梅茲

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‪對，亞歷士戈梅茲

50
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‪我愛那個小傢伙，他對我很重要

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‪迪薇，如果派克斯頓不承認妳
‪我發誓，我會揍扁他

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‪我修了三個學期的武打

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‪三分鐘到了！

54
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‪再見了，兩位

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{\an8}‪劇名：……跟風雲人物一起喝到爛醉

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‪-迪薇，知道這是什麼嗎？
‪-番茄

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‪不，這是全世界最好的番茄

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‪因為這是我們在這裡種的

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‪這是靠我們的耐心、辛勤
‪養出來的果實

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‪那為什麼其他幾顆看起來好糟

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‪那些果實被蟲咬了
‪我必須去買一些噴劑

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‪走吧，我們回屋裡，讓媽媽看看這個

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‪媽媽，看看我們發現什麼？

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‪如果安妮法蘭克有蘋果手機呢？

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{\an8}‪如果溫斯頓邱吉爾有無線網路呢？

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{\an8}‪這個星期我們要分組
‪構思一些手機應用程式

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{\an8}‪用來降低二次大戰的暴行

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{\an8}‪可不可以有一天
‪學習先修測驗會考的內容？

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{\an8}‪拜託，我這麼辛苦備課

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{\an8}‪為你們設計跳脫框架的課程

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{\an8}‪算了，你們快點找三個人湊一組

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‪妳要和我同一組嗎？

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{\an8}‪哇，他是否看了她的性感舞蹈
‪所以改變心意了？

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{\an8}‪好啊，我可以和你一組

75
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{\an8}‪-好極了，我也要和你一組
‪-好哦

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‪好，誰還沒有組別？

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‪班可以加入我們這組

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‪我寧可獨自一組

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{\an8}‪我不希望任何人降低我的報告品質

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{\an8}‪事實上，其中一組要有四個人了

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{\an8}‪所以班、夏娃就加入
‪艾莉諾和法碧歐拉這組吧？

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‪星期一要上臺報告

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{\an8}‪可以去我家討論

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{\an8}‪我的冰箱有一大堆冷凍三明治

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{\an8}‪好啊

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{\an8}‪等等，妳誰啊？

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‪她是迪薇，她沒問題

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{\an8}‪而且她很擅長這些
‪所以我們肯定拿高分

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{\an8}‪-所以我才邀她
‪-太讚了

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‪晚點見

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‪史蒂夫？

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{\an8}‪-嗨
‪-嗨，卡梅拉

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{\an8}‪我剛剛在起司工廠吃午餐

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{\an8}‪吃我們平常點的

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{\an8}‪香烤薯球，不加培根

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{\an8}‪對

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{\an8}‪不過我吃不完

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{\an8}‪分手讓我太難過了

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{\an8}‪再加上分量也太驚人了

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{\an8}‪我看過某人吃盆裝的義大利麵

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‪我知道，我也會想到你

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‪我看到有對情侶在騎協力車

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‪讓我想到你不會騎腳踏車

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‪對

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‪好，再見

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‪等等，卡梅拉，這太瘋狂了

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‪妳的爸媽不能逼妳嫁給這個傢伙

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‪他們沒有逼我

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‪我能選擇…

110
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‪遵照家人安排，或是恥辱過一生

111
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‪讓我和後代子孫都抬不起頭來

112
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‪那太扯了

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‪也許是，但我不能違逆我的家人

114
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‪很抱歉

115
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‪你必須帶別人去本田中心觀賞

116
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‪21名飛員樂團演唱會了

117
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‪讓我這樣說好了

118
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‪我不敢相信一個這麼勇敢的女人

119
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‪可以飛越半個世界，去追求她的夢想

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‪卻允許別人主宰她該和誰在一起

121
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‪迪薇，真美的名字

122
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‪替我繡眉的女士也是印度人

123
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‪妳認識她嗎？

124
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‪我不知道，她叫什麼名字？

125
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‪我不確定，好像是…

126
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‪帕谷席馬拉？

127
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‪嘿，抱歉我遲到了

128
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‪派克斯頓！

129
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‪天啊，游泳真的讓你練出一身肌肉

130
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‪如果畢業舞會的舞伴放你鴿子
‪你知道哪裡可以找到我

131
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‪最近的葡萄酒吧

132
00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:59,252
‪謝謝，我不太擔心那個

133
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‪我從七年級就開始參加畢業舞會了

134
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‪我敢說你能抱起我再丟出去

135
00:07:03,297 --> 00:07:04,877
‪媽，出去，我們要討論作業

136
00:07:10,555 --> 00:07:13,635
‪我們應該先想幾個點子嗎？

137
00:07:14,308 --> 00:07:15,768
‪好，我有個很棒的點子

138
00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:18,862
‪如果有一種應用程式
‪可以把手機變成槍呢？

139
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‪這樣就可以開槍打納粹，戰爭結束

140
00:07:22,733 --> 00:07:25,573
‪應用程式要怎麼把手機變成槍？

141
00:07:26,028 --> 00:07:28,868
‪就像變形金剛的玩具
‪只要按個按鍵，就可以變了

142
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‪-好主意，川特
‪-謝謝

143
00:07:31,784 --> 00:07:34,504
‪既然我們要集思廣義
‪我也想了一些主意

144
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‪太棒了，說來聽聽，小迪

145
00:07:36,789 --> 00:07:40,379
‪哇靠！派克斯頓剛剛替她取了小名？

146
00:07:40,710 --> 00:07:41,540
‪你不會那麼做

147
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‪除非未來打算經常提到那個人

148
00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:49,051
‪對了，你看過佐伊的IG了嗎？

149
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:51,635
‪她上傳一段她在做開合跳的短片

150
00:07:51,721 --> 00:07:52,641
‪不會吧

151
00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:56,024
‪老兄，讓我看看

152
00:07:57,810 --> 00:08:00,270
‪那個跳動也太醉人了

153
00:08:01,772 --> 00:08:03,652
‪我們要重做水晶指甲

154
00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:07,993
‪我喜歡圓弧的方形指甲
‪也許用高雅的漸層粉紅色

155
00:08:08,070 --> 00:08:09,070
‪法碧，妳呢？

156
00:08:10,615 --> 00:08:12,275
‪透明指甲油，謝謝

157
00:08:12,366 --> 00:08:14,116
‪拜託，嘗試一些好玩的美甲藝術

158
00:08:14,202 --> 00:08:17,502
‪我看到一個女孩畫了
‪有五官的冰淇淋筒圖案

159
00:08:18,122 --> 00:08:20,542
‪好，我可以畫小小的電腦嗎？

160
00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:22,132
‪不，那樣很醜

161
00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:26,046
‪試試女生的主題
‪例如花朵或可愛的小鳥

162
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‪妳喜歡什麼小鳥？

163
00:08:29,258 --> 00:08:30,838
‪應該是雞吧

164
00:08:32,929 --> 00:08:36,349
‪好，你們的分組作業怎麼樣了？

165
00:08:36,432 --> 00:08:38,022
‪還好

166
00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:40,390
‪艾莉諾和我
‪被迫和討厭的傢伙同組，班

167
00:08:40,478 --> 00:08:42,768
‪還有另一個女孩，夏娃

168
00:08:44,106 --> 00:08:46,026
‪看來某人有心儀的對象了

169
00:08:46,108 --> 00:08:48,398
‪什麼？不，我才沒有

170
00:08:48,486 --> 00:08:52,526
‪身為科學家，法碧歐拉以前
‪總是過著明確、數據驅動的生活

171
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‪妳好，法碧歐拉

172
00:08:56,285 --> 00:08:58,575
‪你好，“機”爾斯布洛斯南

173
00:09:00,206 --> 00:09:04,126
‪所以她很難應付這些新的複雜情緒

174
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‪是嗎？高中每次我喜歡一個男孩

175
00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:08,922
‪我總說他很討人厭

176
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‪我才不喜歡班

177
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‪他不上體育課，因為他有私人教練

178
00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:18,468
‪好，不然妳喜歡班上哪個男孩子

179
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‪都不喜歡

180
00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:25,151
‪我算是有一個男朋友，亞歷士戈梅茲

181
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‪什麼？天啊，法碧！

182
00:09:28,818 --> 00:09:29,898
‪我好高興

183
00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:31,646
‪我一直期待妳交男朋友

184
00:09:31,737 --> 00:09:33,907
‪讀高中的重點就是交男朋友

185
00:09:34,699 --> 00:09:36,909
‪等等，他是人嗎？他不是機器人吧？

186
00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:38,832
‪他是人

187
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:41,750
‪好

188
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‪迪薇，妳想看什麼？

189
00:09:48,004 --> 00:09:51,724
‪我找到一部寶萊塢電影
‪描述公主愛上街頭清道夫

190
00:09:51,799 --> 00:09:53,049
‪片長只有七小時

191
00:09:53,134 --> 00:09:55,184
‪不要，我們要看《河谷鎮》

192
00:09:55,886 --> 00:09:56,846
‪（誰在觀賞影片）

193
00:09:56,929 --> 00:09:59,059
‪準備收看火辣的青少年浪漫影集

194
00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:04,477
‪那些是高中生？

195
00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:07,772
‪他們的父母同意
‪讓他們在家裡一起洗澡？

196
00:10:08,274 --> 00:10:11,034
‪對，卡梅拉
‪歡迎收看美國青少年肥皂劇

197
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:13,531
‪這些演員其實比媽媽老

198
00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:18,119
‪我可以問妳一個問題嗎？

199
00:10:19,410 --> 00:10:21,870
‪如果有個男孩突然對妳很好
‪那代表什麼？

200
00:10:22,371 --> 00:10:25,331
‪例如他選妳同組做報告
‪他幫妳取了綽號

201
00:10:25,666 --> 00:10:27,666
‪不過卻是怪怪的男生綽號

202
00:10:27,752 --> 00:10:30,382
‪這意味著他想當妳的男朋友嗎？

203
00:10:31,547 --> 00:10:34,337
‪妳為什麼問我？
‪我不知道男朋友什麼的

204
00:10:34,425 --> 00:10:36,215
‪有人提到我知道男朋友的事嗎？

205
00:10:36,844 --> 00:10:38,224
‪我沒有別人可以問

206
00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:40,564
‪媽媽嫁給爸爸，她從來沒約過會

207
00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:41,640
‪我也不會

208
00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:43,644
‪我的第一個男朋友會是我的丈夫

209
00:10:43,726 --> 00:10:45,016
‪所以妳問錯人了

210
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:46,645
‪好吧

211
00:10:47,146 --> 00:10:48,306
‪抱歉提出這種問題

212
00:10:48,397 --> 00:10:49,977
‪我要去倒杯飲料

213
00:10:52,818 --> 00:10:55,448
‪等等，這也是凶殺懸疑劇？

214
00:10:55,529 --> 00:10:57,029
‪這是什麼節目？

215
00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:00,739
‪天啊！

216
00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:05,713
‪快走開！別碰我爸的菜園
‪可惡的郊狼！

217
00:11:08,918 --> 00:11:11,748
‪迪薇不認為自己有什麼靈性

218
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:15,842
‪但她無法否認這個情況有點詭異

219
00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:19,260
‪她感覺自己好像見過這隻郊狼

220
00:11:19,345 --> 00:11:21,135
‪彷彿他們彼此了解

221
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:28,814
‪然後突然間，她知道這隻郊狼是誰了

222
00:11:28,896 --> 00:11:29,766
‪爸？

223
00:11:33,484 --> 00:11:36,614
‪在她家後院的靈異接觸之後

224
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:39,316
‪迪薇決定上網搜尋答案

225
00:11:40,616 --> 00:11:41,826
‪看起來好棒

226
00:11:41,909 --> 00:11:44,249
‪妳做得太好了，看起來好專業

227
00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:46,254
‪謝了，大派

228
00:11:47,081 --> 00:11:48,211
‪什麼？

229
00:11:48,290 --> 00:11:50,210
‪因為之前你叫我小迪

230
00:11:50,793 --> 00:11:52,753
‪我有嗎？真奇怪

231
00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:56,631
‪所以…我剛剛寫好宗旨說明和簡報

232
00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:59,466
‪向股東解釋邦客如何讓倫敦居民

233
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,722
‪在閃電戰期間
‪連結到可以躲藏的防空洞

234
00:12:02,638 --> 00:12:04,888
‪川特，你畫好商標了嗎？

235
00:12:04,974 --> 00:12:05,984
‪好了

236
00:12:07,852 --> 00:12:09,562
‪-B代表防空洞
‪-很好

237
00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:11,152
‪沒錯

238
00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:12,900
‪我只是擔心太簡單了一點

239
00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:15,942
‪也許可以加畫一個人
‪躲在B字母內

240
00:12:16,026 --> 00:12:18,486
‪不好，那太亂了，我喜歡我的

241
00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,821
‪那麼多作業都是妳做的，真是太酷了

242
00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:22,946
‪妳聽聽看，我有想出一個口號

243
00:12:23,033 --> 00:12:23,993
‪那太好了

244
00:12:24,076 --> 00:12:26,036
‪這占我們成績的十分之一
‪口號是什麼？

245
00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:27,620
‪聽好了

246
00:12:27,705 --> 00:12:30,245
‪“邦客，只要點擊圖案
‪打開應用程式

247
00:12:30,332 --> 00:12:33,342
‪輸入地址，就能找到
‪住家附近的防空洞…

248
00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:34,709
‪只要裡面還有空位

249
00:12:35,254 --> 00:12:36,094
‪邦客”

250
00:12:36,714 --> 00:12:38,554
‪吼，這個口號太遜了

251
00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:41,013
‪口號要簡短好唸

252
00:12:41,093 --> 00:12:42,473
‪例如“生活多精采”

253
00:12:42,553 --> 00:12:43,853
‪閉嘴，老兄，這很棒

254
00:12:43,929 --> 00:12:45,929
‪如果你想重修第三次，那就很棒

255
00:12:46,015 --> 00:12:48,475
‪讓迪薇寫，她是我們之中最聰明的

256
00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:50,309
‪不，這很好，派克斯頓

257
00:12:50,394 --> 00:12:52,944
‪但也許我快速順一遍你們的部分

258
00:12:53,022 --> 00:12:54,522
‪確定一切都很流暢

259
00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:56,897
‪隨便妳，我們就算完成了

260
00:12:57,401 --> 00:12:59,531
‪你這個週末會參加派對吧？

261
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:00,912
‪對，我一定到

262
00:13:00,988 --> 00:13:02,238
‪那一定很屌

263
00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:04,833
‪我的爸媽出城了
‪所以我的表哥要帶我去貝夫莫買酒

264
00:13:04,909 --> 00:13:06,369
‪你們有父母不在場的派對？

265
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:10,457
‪我不會用這種說法
‪但沒錯，派對一定超讚的

266
00:13:10,539 --> 00:13:12,369
‪基本上，我邀請了每個我認識的人

267
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:13,378
‪這提醒了我…

268
00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:14,709
‪要不要加一桶生啤酒？

269
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:15,964
‪那正是我要說的

270
00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:17,545
‪迪薇心想

271
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:19,470
‪如果川特邀請了每個認識的人

272
00:13:19,548 --> 00:13:22,838
‪那麼川特也認識她
‪她不就同樣受邀了嗎？

273
00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:26,847
‪這個派對是完美的機會
‪讓派克斯頓知道她也可以很酷

274
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:28,601
‪這樣就能重啟性愛計畫

275
00:13:29,350 --> 00:13:31,390
‪“猶”步是個好主意，你們全瘋了

276
00:13:31,477 --> 00:13:33,557
‪共乘的應用軟體
‪幫助猶太人逃離納粹？

277
00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:34,556
‪太聰明了

278
00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:35,857
‪並不是

279
00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:38,940
‪這個應用軟體等於是告訴陌生人
‪猶太人的確切位置

280
00:13:39,026 --> 00:13:40,566
‪然後派車去圍捕他們

281
00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:43,783
‪隨妳說，這是教室裡最聰明的一個
‪想出來的好主意

282
00:13:43,864 --> 00:13:46,244
‪妳們不喜歡，是因為妳們反猶太人

283
00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:48,119
‪我其實是猶太人

284
00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:50,995
‪妳還不錯，但妳們就爛透了

285
00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:53,500
‪少了妳們的阿呆總司令
‪妳們根本一無是處

286
00:13:53,582 --> 00:13:56,502
‪迪薇才不是阿呆
‪她是創新的印度天后

287
00:13:56,585 --> 00:13:58,495
‪她獨立自主，堅持走自己的路

288
00:13:59,004 --> 00:14:01,804
‪去年萬聖節，她和圖書館人員
‪打扮成一對

289
00:14:01,882 --> 00:14:03,842
‪那就是典型的阿呆行為

290
00:14:03,926 --> 00:14:07,926
‪是嗎？阿呆會和學校當紅的
‪派克斯頓霍爾吉田上床？

291
00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:09,183
‪最好是

292
00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:10,095
‪是真的

293
00:14:10,182 --> 00:14:13,482
‪迪薇和派克斯頓經常愛愛的

294
00:14:13,561 --> 00:14:14,561
‪當然，隨妳說

295
00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:17,645
‪我要照我之前的打算
‪自己做報告就好

296
00:14:17,773 --> 00:14:19,443
‪妳們只好接受我做的了

297
00:14:23,070 --> 00:14:23,900
‪奧立佛來了

298
00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:26,528
‪我要去他家一起泡熱水澡
‪然後深情對唱

299
00:14:26,615 --> 00:14:27,445
‪再見了，兩位

300
00:14:29,493 --> 00:14:30,793
‪我也該走了

301
00:14:31,537 --> 00:14:33,867
‪我喜歡妳的指甲，那些小雞真可愛

302
00:14:34,290 --> 00:14:35,120
‪謝謝

303
00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:37,501
‪在妳走之前，我想問妳

304
00:14:37,585 --> 00:14:41,085
‪這個週末我和幾個朋友要參加

305
00:14:41,171 --> 00:14:43,341
‪年輕酷兒族的募款活動

306
00:14:43,424 --> 00:14:46,144
‪如果妳有興趣，那就太好了

307
00:14:47,636 --> 00:14:48,886
‪為什麼妳要邀我去？

308
00:14:49,597 --> 00:14:51,557
‪因為我覺得也許妳會有興趣

309
00:14:52,099 --> 00:14:53,849
‪為什麼妳不邀請艾莉諾和班？

310
00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:56,770
‪我不知道，他們似乎很難搞

311
00:14:56,854 --> 00:14:59,824
‪-我認為也許…
‪-我覺得妳對我有所誤會

312
00:15:06,864 --> 00:15:08,534
‪我要去參加我的第一個派對

313
00:15:08,616 --> 00:15:10,486
‪那應該很好玩啊

314
00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:12,286
‪所以我有一個請求

315
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:15,247
‪妳可以去商店
‪幫我買一條丁字褲嗎？

316
00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:17,666
‪-什麼？
‪-我媽不肯買給我

317
00:15:18,125 --> 00:15:19,995
‪簡單的紅色蕾絲丁字褲就好

318
00:15:20,085 --> 00:15:22,495
‪正面有水鑽寫著“上我吧”

319
00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:26,008
‪我不會買那種俗氣的丁字褲給妳

320
00:15:26,091 --> 00:15:28,841
‪那我就剪掉內褲包臀的部分
‪沒關係

321
00:15:29,345 --> 00:15:31,505
‪重點是我現在的生活很好

322
00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:34,977
‪基本上我可以忘了
‪之前發生過的那些不好的事

323
00:15:35,059 --> 00:15:37,309
‪忘記不是我們的目標

324
00:15:37,394 --> 00:15:39,904
‪我們在努力處理妳的心路歷程

325
00:15:39,980 --> 00:15:42,150
‪特別是失去妳的父親

326
00:15:42,232 --> 00:15:43,782
‪我正在處理啊

327
00:15:43,859 --> 00:15:46,149
‪事實上，前幾天晚上
‪我和我的爸爸才聊過

328
00:15:47,237 --> 00:15:49,697
‪好，妳是寫在療傷日記

329
00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:51,662
‪不是，他化身一隻郊狼來找我

330
00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:54,452
‪妳說什麼？

331
00:15:55,579 --> 00:15:57,079
‪妳對這種事很難接受嗎？

332
00:15:57,164 --> 00:15:59,004
‪如果是的話，我就不說了

333
00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:02,293
‪在這裡妳想說什麼都很安全，說吧

334
00:16:02,836 --> 00:16:04,206
‪好的…

335
00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:06,416
‪前幾天晚上，我家後院來了一隻郊狼

336
00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:07,967
‪牠真的是我爸爸

337
00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:09,340
‪牠在我爸的菜園中

338
00:16:09,426 --> 00:16:10,836
‪撿起我爸的網球

339
00:16:11,512 --> 00:16:13,012
‪況且牠的眼睛…

340
00:16:14,264 --> 00:16:15,434
‪就是他沒錯！

341
00:16:17,017 --> 00:16:19,477
‪那是很美的事

342
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:22,108
‪照這樣下去

343
00:16:22,189 --> 00:16:25,819
‪妳也可能想像爸爸化身蝴蝶

344
00:16:25,901 --> 00:16:28,361
‪或是小鳥，或是微風…

345
00:16:28,445 --> 00:16:29,445
‪不，萊恩醫生

346
00:16:29,530 --> 00:16:32,570
‪我不是用心靈什麼的隱喻方式
‪去想像看到他

347
00:16:33,158 --> 00:16:35,998
‪我親眼看到我爸的靈魂
‪在一隻郊狼身上

348
00:16:38,288 --> 00:16:39,118
‪好

349
00:16:39,581 --> 00:16:42,751
‪如果妳再看到那隻郊狼

350
00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:44,165
‪我要妳和牠說話

351
00:16:45,087 --> 00:16:46,837
‪告訴牠妳的感受

352
00:16:47,506 --> 00:16:49,166
‪-我會的
‪-好女孩

353
00:16:50,134 --> 00:16:52,394
‪所以…如果妳不買丁字褲給我

354
00:16:52,469 --> 00:16:54,889
‪妳這裡有沒有酒類
‪讓我帶去參加派對？

355
00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:56,135
‪出去

356
00:17:00,310 --> 00:17:02,310
‪媽，抱歉打擾妳

357
00:17:02,396 --> 00:17:05,436
‪但我真的有自己的事要做

358
00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:06,784
‪我們的小組報告還沒弄好

359
00:17:07,359 --> 00:17:09,609
‪我現在必須去川特家

360
00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:11,025
‪我徹底完蛋了

361
00:17:11,113 --> 00:17:12,573
‪妳的報告還沒完成？

362
00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:14,830
‪妳和很笨的同學一組嗎？

363
00:17:14,908 --> 00:17:15,738
‪媽，我說過了

364
00:17:15,826 --> 00:17:17,946
‪輔導老師說了，家長不能夠

365
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:19,117
‪再使用“笨”這個字了

366
00:17:19,204 --> 00:17:21,294
‪所以美國的學校制度才一塌糊塗

367
00:17:21,373 --> 00:17:23,383
‪因為要把每個學生當成很特別的人

368
00:17:23,459 --> 00:17:25,839
‪其實他們大部分都該輟學
‪去學一技之長

369
00:17:25,919 --> 00:17:28,379
‪如果美國有更多航管員

370
00:17:28,464 --> 00:17:29,804
‪我們就不會欠中國錢了

371
00:17:30,507 --> 00:17:32,837
‪妳抱怨完了？我可以去川特家嗎？

372
00:17:32,926 --> 00:17:35,756
‪去吧，帶一盒巧克力糖給他

373
00:17:35,846 --> 00:17:36,926
‪不是裹杏仁的

374
00:17:37,598 --> 00:17:39,178
‪那是要給我同事的

375
00:17:39,266 --> 00:17:41,056
‪媽，美國人不會這樣做的

376
00:17:41,143 --> 00:17:43,813
‪再次說明中國為何會打敗我們

377
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:46,356
‪我的小孩晚上去別人家

378
00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:48,900
‪一定要帶盒甜點給對方的父母

379
00:18:00,204 --> 00:18:02,334
‪等等，妳在看《河谷鎮》嗎？

380
00:18:02,414 --> 00:18:05,254
‪對，我必須從頭開始看
‪才能了解來龍去脈

381
00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:08,844
‪這個影集最有意思的地方
‪就是每個人背景都不同

382
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,261
‪-但他們都很迷人
‪-酷哦

383
00:18:10,339 --> 00:18:12,129
‪我要去朋友家做功課

384
00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:13,926
‪所以我要借妳的高筒靴

385
00:18:14,009 --> 00:18:16,469
‪我不懂這有什麼關聯，為什麼妳…

386
00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:21,140
‪…我很高興妳平安無事

387
00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:22,975
‪雖然我喜歡賈格赫德

388
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:24,940
‪我也很高興妳和那個家庭做個了斷

389
00:18:25,020 --> 00:18:27,690
‪了斷？我愛賈格赫德

390
00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:31,691
‪他和妳一樣是我的家人

391
00:18:31,777 --> 00:18:33,647
‪目前他比妳更像家人

392
00:18:33,737 --> 00:18:35,447
‪小姐，妳哪裡也別想去

393
00:18:35,531 --> 00:18:36,871
‪我要去找賈格赫德

394
00:18:38,158 --> 00:18:39,948
‪今晚不要逼我，媽

395
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:43,960
‪因為我會反抗的

396
00:18:44,581 --> 00:18:45,421
‪哦，貝蒂

397
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:48,245
‪妳真是勇敢，竟敢挺身對抗父母

398
00:18:58,971 --> 00:19:00,181
‪嘿，妳怎麼來了？

399
00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:02,431
‪妳忘了拿計算機還是什麼嗎？

400
00:19:03,475 --> 00:19:05,135
‪哇！迪薇，妳來了

401
00:19:05,227 --> 00:19:07,187
‪妳還帶了加州巧克力

402
00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:09,230
‪這太棒了，進來

403
00:19:11,525 --> 00:19:12,985
‪-要喝一杯嗎？
‪-好啊

404
00:19:13,485 --> 00:19:15,445
‪給我啤酒，我喜歡液體麵包

405
00:19:16,071 --> 00:19:17,071
‪有人這樣說的嗎？

406
00:19:17,573 --> 00:19:18,533
‪我想有吧

407
00:19:19,116 --> 00:19:20,366
‪你不喝嗎？

408
00:19:20,450 --> 00:19:23,830
‪不，游泳賽季期間我不喝
‪要保持體態，妳懂吧？

409
00:19:23,912 --> 00:19:25,042
‪當然懂

410
00:19:25,122 --> 00:19:27,082
‪如果我有你的身材，我也會好好維持

411
00:19:28,292 --> 00:19:30,172
‪我很抱歉，這樣說真是太奇怪了

412
00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:32,422
‪沒關係，妳是一個奇怪的女孩

413
00:19:32,504 --> 00:19:34,174
‪嘿，我不知道這是什麼意思

414
00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:37,466
‪聽他說話像是在侮辱人
‪最後摸一把卻又像在調情？

415
00:19:37,551 --> 00:19:40,351
‪在我的年代，如果喜歡誰
‪就指著看臺上的她們

416
00:19:40,429 --> 00:19:41,679
‪她們就會把胸罩扔過來

417
00:19:41,763 --> 00:19:43,603
‪這個？我不知道這算什麼

418
00:19:43,682 --> 00:19:44,852
‪嘿

419
00:19:44,933 --> 00:19:47,063
‪菲爾吃了迷幻蘑菇
‪他出現不太好的幻覺

420
00:19:47,144 --> 00:19:48,234
‪你要去鬧鬧他嗎？

421
00:19:48,312 --> 00:19:50,232
‪當然要，你的媽媽有舊洋娃娃嗎？

422
00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:52,154
‪-他會嚇到屁滾尿流
‪-對

423
00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:53,444
‪菲爾！

424
00:20:01,158 --> 00:20:03,908
‪我們好像看同一個眼科醫生

425
00:20:04,286 --> 00:20:05,286
‪在奇波雷餐廳隔壁？

426
00:20:07,372 --> 00:20:09,922
‪大家好嗎？誰要吃披薩？

427
00:20:11,793 --> 00:20:13,673
‪真希望他帶墨西哥捲餅來

428
00:20:17,299 --> 00:20:20,929
‪你要喝一瓶開特力嗎？
‪因為你似乎真的很需要

429
00:20:21,011 --> 00:20:21,971
‪妳在這裡做什麼？

430
00:20:22,054 --> 00:20:23,894
‪妳的朋友不是兩根指頭就數完了？

431
00:20:23,972 --> 00:20:25,182
‪你自己才是吧

432
00:20:25,265 --> 00:20:27,475
‪你怎麼會在這裡？這些人又不喜歡你

433
00:20:27,559 --> 00:20:29,519
‪他們喜歡我，你好嗎，川特？

434
00:20:31,355 --> 00:20:32,185
‪隨便啦

435
00:20:32,272 --> 00:20:34,692
‪席拉和佐伊一起打草地曲棍球
‪所以她邀了我們

436
00:20:34,775 --> 00:20:37,235
‪-原來啊
‪-對，妳又是和誰一起的？

437
00:20:37,653 --> 00:20:40,033
‪基本上我整晚都在和派克斯頓說話

438
00:20:40,113 --> 00:20:41,573
‪所以我會說是他

439
00:20:41,657 --> 00:20:43,487
‪是嗎？那個派克斯頓？

440
00:20:44,618 --> 00:20:45,948
‪天啊，派克斯頓，別說了

441
00:20:46,036 --> 00:20:47,906
‪你會害我灑了這杯蔓越莓伏特加

442
00:20:49,456 --> 00:20:51,826
‪派克斯頓和佐伊，很迷人的一對吧？

443
00:20:52,459 --> 00:20:54,169
‪她只有胸部以下迷人

444
00:20:54,836 --> 00:20:55,666
‪還有下巴以上

445
00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:58,005
‪但她的脖子怪怪的

446
00:20:58,090 --> 00:20:59,840
‪讓迪薇最難過的

447
00:20:59,925 --> 00:21:02,835
‪不是看到派克斯頓
‪緊貼著高二最辣的女孩

448
00:21:02,928 --> 00:21:06,388
‪而是她讓自己相信
‪她真的有機會和他在一起

449
00:21:07,599 --> 00:21:08,679
‪也許妳應該喝慢一點

450
00:21:08,767 --> 00:21:10,097
‪也許你應該閉嘴

451
00:21:11,436 --> 00:21:12,476
‪好…

452
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:17,318
‪喝醉、行為粗魯

453
00:21:17,401 --> 00:21:21,151
‪迪薇放縱自己的方式
‪我會說是自我毀滅的行為

454
00:21:21,238 --> 00:21:23,738
‪哇靠！草地上有隻郊狼

455
00:21:27,661 --> 00:21:28,951
‪哇，妳在做什麼？

456
00:21:29,413 --> 00:21:31,463
‪別擔心，牠不會傷害我

457
00:21:31,540 --> 00:21:33,080
‪迪薇，小心一點

458
00:21:36,962 --> 00:21:37,962
‪爸？

459
00:21:38,755 --> 00:21:40,415
‪我就知道是你

460
00:21:40,882 --> 00:21:42,632
‪我好想你

461
00:21:42,718 --> 00:21:45,258
‪你是來替我打氣的，對吧？

462
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:50,178
‪不！

463
00:21:50,267 --> 00:21:52,347
‪有隻郊狼咬了一個UN成員

464
00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:54,856
‪根本就是《小紅帽》的情節

465
00:21:54,938 --> 00:21:56,398
‪妳死了嗎？

466
00:21:59,359 --> 00:22:02,069
‪來吧，靠在我身上，我扶住妳了

467
00:22:08,744 --> 00:22:12,124
‪天啊，姐妹們，沒有妳們陪
‪我不該單獨行動的

468
00:22:12,205 --> 00:22:13,455
‪我真的被咬傷了

469
00:22:13,957 --> 00:22:16,037
‪誰在乎啊？妳和派克斯頓在一起吧？

470
00:22:16,126 --> 00:22:19,416
‪妳可以體驗醫院性愛
‪就像《實習醫生》那樣

471
00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:22,589
‪試著在補給室站著做

472
00:22:23,050 --> 00:22:25,640
‪我應該進不去補給室

473
00:22:25,719 --> 00:22:27,759
‪好吧，那就去太平間做

474
00:22:27,846 --> 00:22:29,176
‪我才不要去太平間做

475
00:22:29,264 --> 00:22:30,224
‪去太平間做什麼？

476
00:22:31,350 --> 00:22:32,680
‪偷骨頭

477
00:22:32,768 --> 00:22:35,398
‪對，明智的決定
‪妳可能因此去坐牢的

478
00:22:36,688 --> 00:22:37,728
‪謝謝

479
00:22:38,148 --> 00:22:40,528
‪-妳在IG紅了
‪-什麼意思？

480
00:22:40,609 --> 00:22:42,029
‪對，每個人都以為妳死了

481
00:22:42,778 --> 00:22:44,528
‪來拍張照片，讓他們知道妳沒事

482
00:22:51,620 --> 00:22:54,250
‪等等，你要上傳到你的IG圖格？

483
00:22:54,331 --> 00:22:56,081
‪不是限時動態？

484
00:22:56,166 --> 00:22:57,376
‪對，妳把自己標註上去

485
00:23:00,170 --> 00:23:01,420
‪我可以問妳嗎？

486
00:23:01,922 --> 00:23:04,012
‪妳那麼靠近那隻郊狼
‪到底在想什麼？

487
00:23:05,675 --> 00:23:10,055
‪聽起來很瘋狂
‪但我以為牠是我死去的爸爸

488
00:23:11,264 --> 00:23:15,314
‪顯然牠不是，因為牠咬我了

489
00:23:16,186 --> 00:23:17,186
‪我懂妳的心情

490
00:23:17,270 --> 00:23:20,230
‪等等，所以你不認為我瘋了？

491
00:23:20,315 --> 00:23:22,315
‪不，我認為妳很瘋狂

492
00:23:22,401 --> 00:23:24,441
‪不過是好的瘋狂

493
00:23:25,404 --> 00:23:26,614
‪等等，就是這個了？

494
00:23:26,696 --> 00:23:28,986
‪這是迪薇一直在等待的時刻嗎？

495
00:23:29,074 --> 00:23:30,664
‪所以我們做朋友很好

496
00:23:30,742 --> 00:23:31,872
‪朋友？

497
00:23:32,285 --> 00:23:35,655
‪唉呀！我敢說這比被郊狼咬一口更痛

498
00:23:35,747 --> 00:23:37,367
‪可惡，迪薇！

499
00:23:37,457 --> 00:23:38,827
‪你是誰？你在這裡做什麼？

500
00:23:38,917 --> 00:23:40,247
‪妳好，威舍庫瑪醫生

501
00:23:40,710 --> 00:23:44,340
‪迪薇被郊狼咬傷
‪但她現在情況穩定了

502
00:23:44,423 --> 00:23:46,553
‪是嗎？她的情況穩定了？

503
00:23:46,633 --> 00:23:47,593
‪她的生命徵象呢？

504
00:23:47,676 --> 00:23:49,926
‪請詳細說明
‪你這個活動的人類乳突病毒

505
00:23:50,011 --> 00:23:51,891
‪-給我離開
‪-媽

506
00:23:53,306 --> 00:23:54,306
‪出去

507
00:23:54,891 --> 00:23:56,811
‪天啊，孩子，聽說妳被野生動物咬了

508
00:23:56,893 --> 00:23:59,403
‪妳知道我有多擔心嗎？

509
00:23:59,938 --> 00:24:03,068
‪然後我來到醫院，護士告訴我

510
00:24:03,150 --> 00:24:04,480
‪妳受傷是因為喝醉了！

511
00:24:04,568 --> 00:24:05,648
‪我的肩膀！

512
00:24:05,735 --> 00:24:08,275
‪妳著了什麼魔，為何這麼不守規矩？

513
00:24:08,864 --> 00:24:10,744
‪我知道我搞砸了

514
00:24:10,824 --> 00:24:12,664
‪我只是想當一個正常的青少年

515
00:24:12,742 --> 00:24:14,912
‪正常的青少年最後都淪落監獄

516
00:24:14,995 --> 00:24:16,655
‪或者更糟，在潛艇堡連鎖店工作

517
00:24:16,746 --> 00:24:17,746
‪希望妳玩得很開心

518
00:24:17,831 --> 00:24:20,501
‪因為接下來妳要禁足到畢業那天

519
00:24:20,584 --> 00:24:23,214
‪不，抱歉說錯了
‪直到妳的小孩畢業那一天

520
00:24:23,670 --> 00:24:25,170
‪我去找妳的醫生

521
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:30,890
‪（派克斯頓開始追蹤妳）

522
00:24:31,219 --> 00:24:32,549
‪（派克斯頓說妳的影片讚）

523
00:24:41,688 --> 00:24:42,608
‪卡梅拉？

524
00:24:43,148 --> 00:24:44,108
‪妳在這裡做什麼？

525
00:24:44,191 --> 00:24:46,941
‪我想你也許想吃些
‪香烤薯球，不加培根

526
00:24:48,528 --> 00:24:50,988
‪聽著，妳真貼心，但是…

527
00:24:51,656 --> 00:24:53,486
‪我覺得要和妳當普通朋友太難了

528
00:24:56,328 --> 00:24:59,248
‪我不是來和你當普通朋友的
‪我想要和你在一起…

529
00:24:59,664 --> 00:25:01,424
‪即使你來自城裡不對盤的家族

530
00:25:01,500 --> 00:25:03,210
‪或你的爸爸因為盜用公款坐牢

531
00:25:04,211 --> 00:25:05,801
‪我從在一起之後就聽不懂了

532
00:25:06,713 --> 00:25:07,673
‪抱歉

533
00:25:07,756 --> 00:25:09,926
‪我剛剛看了16個小時的《河谷鎮》

534
00:25:10,008 --> 00:25:12,428
‪還有賈格赫德親吻哈利波特的
‪同人虛構小說

535
00:25:12,886 --> 00:25:13,966
‪等等

536
00:25:15,263 --> 00:25:16,223
‪妳想和我在一起？

537
00:25:16,723 --> 00:25:17,683
‪對

538
00:25:22,979 --> 00:25:24,359
‪但妳的家人怎麼辦？

539
00:25:25,148 --> 00:25:26,358
‪我不管他們怎麼想

540
00:25:27,108 --> 00:25:29,738
‪不過我也不打算告訴他們

541
00:25:29,819 --> 00:25:32,529
‪我們就假裝讓他們安排我的婚事

542
00:25:32,614 --> 00:25:33,454
‪這樣可以嗎？

543
00:25:33,990 --> 00:25:36,280
‪妳一說要和我在一起
‪後面的我全沒在聽

544
00:25:42,374 --> 00:25:45,384
‪我們的應用程式可以保障你
‪不受災難性的炸彈攻擊

545
00:25:45,460 --> 00:25:47,750
‪想像你住在廣島，某一天醒來

546
00:25:47,837 --> 00:25:49,757
‪不知道外出是否安全

547
00:25:50,173 --> 00:25:52,553
‪看來星期一和星期二天空晴朗

548
00:25:52,634 --> 00:25:53,844
‪何不到公園走走呢？

549
00:25:53,927 --> 00:25:55,757
‪但星期三會發生什麼事？

550
00:25:56,763 --> 00:25:57,893
‪有原子彈

551
00:25:58,306 --> 00:25:59,516
‪所以快點出城

552
00:25:59,599 --> 00:26:01,059
‪但是不要去長崎

553
00:26:03,562 --> 00:26:05,902
‪很有創意

554
00:26:05,981 --> 00:26:07,191
‪好，下一組

555
00:26:07,274 --> 00:26:09,154
‪派克斯頓、川特和迪薇

556
00:26:12,070 --> 00:26:13,910
‪我們這一組做的應用程式叫邦客

557
00:26:13,989 --> 00:26:16,829
‪想像在法國的閃“光”戰期間

558
00:26:16,908 --> 00:26:17,868
‪閃電戰

559
00:26:18,285 --> 00:26:20,865
‪你如何找一個安全的地方躲藏
‪免得被炸死？

560
00:26:20,954 --> 00:26:24,374
‪有了邦客，你可以找到
‪住家附近的安全地點

561
00:26:24,457 --> 00:26:26,497
‪不管是躲德軍的轟炸機，或是…

562
00:26:26,585 --> 00:26:27,535
‪或是郊狼

563
00:26:28,086 --> 00:26:29,496
‪郊狼女孩！好耶！

564
00:26:29,588 --> 00:26:30,918
‪郊狼女孩！

565
00:26:32,465 --> 00:26:33,925
‪郊狼女孩！

566
00:26:35,051 --> 00:26:36,141
‪郊狼女孩！

567
00:26:40,056 --> 00:26:41,216
‪郊狼女孩！

568
00:26:44,603 --> 00:26:46,523
‪那隻郊狼也許不是她的父親

569
00:26:46,605 --> 00:26:49,105
‪企圖從另一個世界和她溝通

570
00:26:49,190 --> 00:26:51,570
‪但最後牠還是一個朋友

571
00:26:53,820 --> 00:26:56,070
‪妳覺得滿月時，妳會發生什麼事？

572
00:26:56,156 --> 00:26:58,196
‪-那是狼人啦，老兄
‪-對哦

573
00:26:58,783 --> 00:27:00,583
‪夏娃，我…

574
00:27:02,162 --> 00:27:05,212
‪法碧，放學後妳想去優格園嗎？

575
00:27:05,290 --> 00:27:08,040
‪如果拿到夠多的試吃品
‪就可以擠出一大杯

576
00:27:08,752 --> 00:27:11,962
‪亞歷士，那個約會雖然很吸引人

577
00:27:12,047 --> 00:27:14,757
‪恐怕你需要找另一個女孩去吃優格了

578
00:27:20,263 --> 00:27:23,063
‪蒂芬妮，放學後妳想去優格園嗎？

579
00:27:23,141 --> 00:27:25,691
‪如果拿到夠多的試吃品
‪就可以擠出一大杯

580
00:27:26,895 --> 00:27:27,845
‪好極了

581
00:27:40,367 --> 00:27:42,907
‪嗨，妳好嗎？

582
00:27:49,542 --> 00:27:51,712
‪我是機器人

583
00:27:56,549 --> 00:27:58,129
{\an8}‪（媽：晚上去血拼？）

584
00:27:58,218 --> 00:28:01,428
{\an8}‪（我們買些漂亮衣物
‪讓亞歷士戈梅茲驚豔一下）

585
00:28:15,735 --> 00:28:17,445
‪我是同志

586
00:29:18,673 --> 00:29:19,973
‪字幕翻譯：陳彬彬