1
00:00:08,779 --> 00:00:10,156
-Throw in an eight.
-[man 1] Yeah.

2
00:00:10,239 --> 00:00:12,366
-[all laugh]
-I'm out. Too rich for my blood.

3
00:00:12,450 --> 00:00:14,577
Oh, what happened to Mr. High Roller, huh?

4
00:00:14,660 --> 00:00:16,954
Mr. High Roller's wife's
about to buy a new patio set.

5
00:00:17,038 --> 00:00:17,997
[all laugh]

6
00:00:18,080 --> 00:00:20,833
I'm not arguing.
Easier to just say, "Okay, honey, okay."

7
00:00:20,916 --> 00:00:22,293
[all laugh]

8
00:00:22,376 --> 00:00:24,253
-I've got nothing.
-That's what your wife said.

9
00:00:24,336 --> 00:00:25,838
[all exclaim]

10
00:00:25,921 --> 00:00:28,257
Trust me,
my wife has nothing to complain about.

11
00:00:28,340 --> 00:00:31,177
Unless you're talking about
every little thing I've ever done.

12
00:00:31,260 --> 00:00:33,054
Okay, okay, call, call.

13
00:00:33,137 --> 00:00:35,806
-Oh… Flush.
-[exclaims]

14
00:00:35,890 --> 00:00:38,642
That's what my wife says
every time I have to pee.

15
00:00:38,726 --> 00:00:41,437
And I say, "I'm just gonna
pee again in ten minutes."

16
00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:44,815
"What am I gonna do, flush again?
It's just piss."

17
00:00:44,899 --> 00:00:46,859
[all laugh]

18
00:00:46,942 --> 00:00:48,569
"Just piss." That's good.

19
00:00:48,652 --> 00:00:51,113
Whoa. Looks like someone's
going for a new record.

20
00:00:51,697 --> 00:00:52,948
Oh. Yeah.

21
00:00:53,032 --> 00:00:57,286
You guys would be clugging
a few cans too, if you had my wife.

22
00:00:57,369 --> 00:00:59,371
[all laughing]

23
00:01:00,623 --> 00:01:02,208
[man 2] That was funny.

24
00:01:02,291 --> 00:01:04,668
["First Light" by Dustin Tebbutt playing]

25
00:01:05,669 --> 00:01:06,504
[sighs]

26
00:01:06,587 --> 00:01:09,006
♪ To where these stars
Still shine for you ♪

27
00:01:09,507 --> 00:01:11,509
♪ I'm looking up ♪

28
00:01:13,135 --> 00:01:15,471
-[laughing]
-[gargling]

29
00:01:17,223 --> 00:01:18,808
♪ I'm looking up ♪

30
00:01:21,977 --> 00:01:22,812
Hey, honey…

31
00:01:24,438 --> 00:01:27,483
I, uh, auditioned for a play

32
00:01:27,566 --> 00:01:29,777
and I got the part.

33
00:01:30,361 --> 00:01:33,781
-Oh, my God! [exclaims]
-[laughing]

34
00:01:33,864 --> 00:01:36,909
-Your husband is a henchman.
-You're a henchman!

35
00:01:36,992 --> 00:01:37,993
[door opens]

36
00:01:39,286 --> 00:01:41,956
-How was your dress rehearsal?
-Jamie Taco keeps taking my lines.

37
00:01:42,039 --> 00:01:44,542
-Who's Jamie Taco?
-He's the other henchman.

38
00:01:44,625 --> 00:01:46,752
He says my lines
before I can even get 'em out.

39
00:01:46,836 --> 00:01:50,005
The director doesn't do anything.
Jamie took 15 of my lines.

40
00:01:50,089 --> 00:01:52,174
What do you mean he says them
before you can get them?

41
00:01:52,258 --> 00:01:55,177
He says 'em so fast,
before I can say them,

42
00:01:55,261 --> 00:01:56,720
then they become his lines.

43
00:01:56,804 --> 00:01:58,931
I should quit,
I don't even know what I'm doing.

44
00:01:59,014 --> 00:01:59,890
Honey, no.

45
00:01:59,974 --> 00:02:02,977
But I'm never gonna say
my lines faster than Jamie Taco!

46
00:02:04,311 --> 00:02:05,437
[all laughing]

47
00:02:05,521 --> 00:02:07,481
He had no idea
what he was doing, and I told him,

48
00:02:07,565 --> 00:02:09,567
"Have you ever done anything before?"

49
00:02:09,650 --> 00:02:11,944
-It was all weird and ridiculous--
-Jamie?

50
00:02:12,027 --> 00:02:13,362
Yes?

51
00:02:13,946 --> 00:02:17,616
Uh, some of the lines
you're saying might be my lines.

52
00:02:17,700 --> 00:02:18,868
What?

53
00:02:18,951 --> 00:02:22,746
Some of the lines you say on stage,
I think some of them might be my lines.

54
00:02:22,830 --> 00:02:24,999
Who said them? Who said the lines?

55
00:02:25,082 --> 00:02:27,877
Well, you did.
But they're supposed to be mine.

56
00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:30,254
You gotta be much quicker
if you want to have those lines.

57
00:02:30,337 --> 00:02:32,840
The audience doesn't know
whose lines they are.

58
00:02:32,923 --> 00:02:35,593
And if I say them, they're mine.
And I'm quick.

59
00:02:35,676 --> 00:02:38,262
Hey, Brandon, wait up! I'm starving!

60
00:02:39,763 --> 00:02:43,684
I'll slap your head around, you jabroni.
Now give me some pozole, I'm hungry.

61
00:02:43,767 --> 00:02:46,145
I'm no jabroni. My uncle is going
to shoot your head off.

62
00:02:46,228 --> 00:02:48,898
Don't talk to me like that.
I got 1,500 guys that'll pop you.

63
00:02:48,981 --> 00:02:50,065
My pozole!

64
00:02:50,149 --> 00:02:51,025
[mutters inaudibly]

65
00:02:52,568 --> 00:02:55,196
-Grab the keys--
-Grab the keys, get in the truck, jabroni!

66
00:02:55,279 --> 00:02:56,447
I'll slap you, jabroni!

67
00:02:59,033 --> 00:03:03,245
♪ Your eyes, at first light ♪

68
00:03:03,913 --> 00:03:06,457
You were so good!

69
00:03:06,540 --> 00:03:09,084
I only got the-- [sniffles]
I only got the one line out.

70
00:03:09,168 --> 00:03:11,086
But it was the best line of the night.

71
00:03:11,754 --> 00:03:13,589
-Really?
-Really.

72
00:03:14,298 --> 00:03:16,800
-Let's go get something to eat.
-Okay.

73
00:03:19,887 --> 00:03:22,348
Hey, ah, good job tonight, Jamie.

74
00:03:22,431 --> 00:03:25,017
I'm going to get that line tomorrow.

75
00:03:27,228 --> 00:03:28,479
I am so proud of you.

76
00:03:29,063 --> 00:03:31,565
-[sniffles] I love you.
-I know.

77
00:03:31,649 --> 00:03:33,108
-I love you.
-I love you, too.

78
00:03:33,192 --> 00:03:34,193
Hey, when you said…

79
00:03:35,736 --> 00:03:36,695
No.

80
00:03:37,905 --> 00:03:41,158
No, no, I wish I hadn't said that.

81
00:03:41,242 --> 00:03:42,785
I love my wife.

82
00:03:42,868 --> 00:03:46,622
She helped me
when I freaked out about Jamie Taco.

83
00:03:47,414 --> 00:03:50,167
-Come on, we're all joking around.
-Yeah, come on.

84
00:03:50,251 --> 00:03:52,544
I'm gonna go.
I'm not going to stay the night.

85
00:03:52,628 --> 00:03:53,671
[all exclaim]

86
00:03:53,754 --> 00:03:56,382
-[man] Come on!
-He never stays the night.

87
00:03:56,465 --> 00:03:58,801
He always says he's gonna
and he never does.

88
00:03:58,884 --> 00:04:00,219
Scott, stay.

89
00:04:02,388 --> 00:04:03,806
It's my birthday.

90
00:04:06,558 --> 00:04:07,893
I gotta go.

91
00:04:11,647 --> 00:04:12,815
[door closes]

92
00:04:13,983 --> 00:04:16,652
[theme music playing]

93
00:04:21,907 --> 00:04:25,452
Should I toss this in the trash
or you have a recycling here?

94
00:04:25,536 --> 00:04:27,955
You can just throw it in the bin
under the sink.

95
00:04:28,038 --> 00:04:30,749
Or you could put it in the trash hutch

96
00:04:30,833 --> 00:04:33,168
that Marcus was going
to build on the porch.

97
00:04:34,003 --> 00:04:35,713
-What?
-Are you serious?

98
00:04:35,796 --> 00:04:38,882
Why say that? We come here
three times a year, when will I build it?

99
00:04:38,966 --> 00:04:40,968
Jesus, Marcus. It was just a joke.

100
00:04:41,051 --> 00:04:45,472
A really funny joke about how I haven't
built the trash hutch. Thank you.

101
00:04:45,556 --> 00:04:47,308
-[imitates laughter]
-[Jeanine] Ugh.

102
00:04:47,391 --> 00:04:48,809
What a baby.

103
00:04:48,892 --> 00:04:50,936
I'm so sorry, it's so tense here.

104
00:04:51,020 --> 00:04:52,438
[Marcus] Jesus Christ.

105
00:04:52,521 --> 00:04:56,525
-You know? Think I might be able to help.
-What are you gonna do?

106
00:04:56,608 --> 00:04:58,152
Where's my big green bag?

107
00:04:58,235 --> 00:05:00,070
I put it in the closet with our jackets.

108
00:05:00,154 --> 00:05:03,073
I'll be right back.
I think I might be able to help.

109
00:05:06,702 --> 00:05:07,536
[device beeps]

110
00:05:07,619 --> 00:05:10,664
I should probably get up
and start getting dinner ready.

111
00:05:10,748 --> 00:05:13,751
[laughs maniacally]

112
00:05:13,834 --> 00:05:15,377
-[Jeanine] What?
-Was that a joke?

113
00:05:15,461 --> 00:05:17,129
I honestly can't tell with you.

114
00:05:17,212 --> 00:05:18,505
[upbeat music playing]

115
00:05:22,593 --> 00:05:24,303
What the hell is he doing?

116
00:05:27,139 --> 00:05:28,891
[dog barking]

117
00:05:28,974 --> 00:05:30,517
[upbeat music continues]

118
00:05:30,601 --> 00:05:32,978
What the fuck is he doing?
What are you doing?

119
00:05:33,062 --> 00:05:34,146
Saving the party, brother!

120
00:05:34,229 --> 00:05:36,523
Can you calm Barbie down?
She's freaking out.

121
00:05:36,607 --> 00:05:37,816
I'm trying, but she can't.

122
00:05:37,900 --> 00:05:40,486
She thinks he's a new guy
'cause of the glasses and the hat.

123
00:05:40,569 --> 00:05:42,780
-What do you mean?
-'Cause of the hat and glasses.

124
00:05:42,863 --> 00:05:46,408
-She's thinks that he's a new guy.
-Can you take the hat and glasses off?

125
00:05:46,492 --> 00:05:47,743
-No.
-Damn it!

126
00:05:47,826 --> 00:05:49,161
Probably smells my dog.

127
00:05:49,244 --> 00:05:51,121
What? We know what the problem is.

128
00:05:51,205 --> 00:05:53,707
-Something spooked her.
-It's Lisa's fuckin' boyfriend.

129
00:05:53,791 --> 00:05:56,835
Okay, if you just take
that hat and glasses off--

130
00:05:56,919 --> 00:05:58,504
He said no, Jeanine!

131
00:05:58,587 --> 00:06:01,423
[barking continues]

132
00:06:01,507 --> 00:06:02,758
Jack it up a lot.

133
00:06:02,841 --> 00:06:05,344
-[music volume increasing]
-Okay, it's too loud.

134
00:06:05,427 --> 00:06:06,470
[music continues]

135
00:06:06,553 --> 00:06:07,888
Mommy, what's happening?

136
00:06:07,971 --> 00:06:11,350
Marcus, can you please calm the dog down?
She's scaring my kid!

137
00:06:11,433 --> 00:06:14,144
-It's her house, she's doing what's right!
-Fuck you.

138
00:06:18,399 --> 00:06:20,526
-[music volume increasing]
-It's too loud!

139
00:06:20,609 --> 00:06:21,902
Stop! Stop!

140
00:06:22,569 --> 00:06:24,822
-[woman] Stop.
-Nobody likes what you're doing.

141
00:06:24,905 --> 00:06:27,116
-Turn the music down a bit.
-You're upsetting everybody.

142
00:06:28,033 --> 00:06:30,369
-Oh, fuck!
-[woman] Oh, my God!

143
00:06:32,538 --> 00:06:34,039
[music ends]

144
00:06:34,123 --> 00:06:35,416
[barking]

145
00:06:35,499 --> 00:06:37,126
Take off the glasses, too.

146
00:06:37,751 --> 00:06:38,794
[barking stops]

147
00:06:40,170 --> 00:06:41,338
[cries softly]

148
00:06:42,172 --> 00:06:45,634
It's just me, Barbie,
I'm not the Blues Brothers.

149
00:06:47,219 --> 00:06:48,178
[sniffles]

150
00:06:53,225 --> 00:06:56,812
This… This really is
quite a beautiful house.

151
00:06:56,895 --> 00:06:59,982
♪ Baby, baby, baby, baby
Bay-bay-bay ♪

152
00:07:00,065 --> 00:07:02,734
♪ Whoa, baby, baby
Bay-bay-bay ♪

153
00:07:11,326 --> 00:07:12,828
-Hey.
-Hey.

154
00:07:12,911 --> 00:07:14,872
Looks like you were in a bit of a rush.

155
00:07:14,955 --> 00:07:15,956
What's that?

156
00:07:16,039 --> 00:07:17,958
Your pants, didn't finish shaking?

157
00:07:18,500 --> 00:07:19,334
Oh.

158
00:07:19,418 --> 00:07:21,336
No, he did. He shook.

159
00:07:21,420 --> 00:07:23,630
-He did what?
-He finished shaking.

160
00:07:23,714 --> 00:07:25,090
Those ain't piss dots.

161
00:07:25,174 --> 00:07:27,259
-That's got nothing to do with piss.
-Excuse me?

162
00:07:27,342 --> 00:07:30,137
Those pants come
like that with those two little dots.

163
00:07:30,220 --> 00:07:33,098
They're really in style right now.
Even rappers wear 'em.

164
00:07:33,891 --> 00:07:38,187
Don't believe me? Look it up for yourself.
Go to calicocutpants.com.

165
00:07:38,270 --> 00:07:42,024
-Calico Cut?
-Calicocutpants.com, right now.

166
00:07:42,107 --> 00:07:43,484
It's not that big a deal.

167
00:07:43,567 --> 00:07:46,320
If you don't believe me,
go ahead, look it up right now.

168
00:07:47,446 --> 00:07:49,490
Okay, fine.

169
00:07:51,200 --> 00:07:55,496
-"Calicocutpants.com."
-[mouths inaudibly]

170
00:07:56,455 --> 00:07:57,748
Oh, yeah, here it is.

171
00:07:58,707 --> 00:08:02,586
-They sell pants with little dots on 'em.
-That's got nothing to do with piss.

172
00:08:02,669 --> 00:08:06,590
Oh, okay. Sorry.
Thought he dropped a few drops of pee.

173
00:08:06,673 --> 00:08:08,133
He didn't. That ain't the case here.

174
00:08:08,217 --> 00:08:10,677
That ain't piss.
That's got nothing to do with piss.

175
00:08:11,678 --> 00:08:12,554
Okay.

176
00:08:12,638 --> 00:08:14,097
Okay.

177
00:08:15,641 --> 00:08:16,683
See ya.

178
00:08:17,392 --> 00:08:20,896
Uh, thanks, but I didn't buy
these pants like this.

179
00:08:20,979 --> 00:08:24,608
I know. You can't buy those pants.
Those pants don't exist.

180
00:08:24,691 --> 00:08:25,526
They don't?

181
00:08:25,609 --> 00:08:29,154
It's just a website that says
that these kinds of pants exist.

182
00:08:29,238 --> 00:08:31,156
Wouldn't you agree that's all you need?

183
00:08:31,949 --> 00:08:32,824
I don't know.

184
00:08:32,908 --> 00:08:35,911
If Glen thinks
that they sell those kinds of pants,

185
00:08:35,994 --> 00:08:38,288
he can't prove
that you got piss on your pants

186
00:08:38,372 --> 00:08:41,208
or that you just own these kinds of pants.

187
00:08:41,291 --> 00:08:42,793
It's the perfect thing.

188
00:08:43,835 --> 00:08:47,422
I guess. What happens if you try
to buy the pants on that website?

189
00:08:47,506 --> 00:08:49,216
They all say they're out of stock.

190
00:08:49,299 --> 00:08:51,885
That also makes it seem
like it's a hot item.

191
00:08:51,969 --> 00:08:54,638
It's the same thing Supreme does,
wouldn't you agree?

192
00:08:55,472 --> 00:08:56,306
I guess.

193
00:08:56,390 --> 00:08:58,850
[chuckles] But you gotta give.

194
00:08:58,934 --> 00:09:00,894
-I'm sorry?
-You gotta give.

195
00:09:00,978 --> 00:09:04,106
Calicocutpants.com
is completely user funded.

196
00:09:04,189 --> 00:09:08,569
That means no banner ads, no paywall.
It's completely user funded.

197
00:09:09,611 --> 00:09:12,614
So you pay to keep it active?

198
00:09:12,698 --> 00:09:14,283
It's just like PBS.

199
00:09:14,366 --> 00:09:17,786
Anyone can use it,
but if nobody gives, it goes dark.

200
00:09:17,869 --> 00:09:21,873
Rick, the guy who started this thing,
he's completely under water.

201
00:09:21,957 --> 00:09:24,084
He can't get a grip on this thing.

202
00:09:24,167 --> 00:09:27,462
So, it's only right,
if you use something, to give, right?

203
00:09:29,256 --> 00:09:30,132
Yeah.

204
00:09:30,882 --> 00:09:34,011
Hey, hold that door!
Hold that door! Hold that door!

205
00:09:51,820 --> 00:09:52,904
Did you give?

206
00:09:52,988 --> 00:09:54,865
Oh. Uh, hey. No, not yet.

207
00:09:55,574 --> 00:09:58,619
If people use it
and they don't give, it could go dark.

208
00:09:59,202 --> 00:10:03,832
So, one more time, it's that we give
money to the website to keep it active,

209
00:10:03,915 --> 00:10:06,043
even though it doesn't
actually sell pants?

210
00:10:06,126 --> 00:10:07,127
[shushes]

211
00:10:07,210 --> 00:10:09,087
[banging loudly]

212
00:10:09,171 --> 00:10:12,174
What are you thinking? If people
find out they don't sell the pants,

213
00:10:12,257 --> 00:10:13,675
the whole thing falls apart.

214
00:10:13,759 --> 00:10:17,262
-What are you doing?
-So no one can hear they don't sell pants.

215
00:10:17,346 --> 00:10:19,139
The whole thing relies on the users giving

216
00:10:19,222 --> 00:10:22,434
and the users being discreet
about that they don't sell the pants!

217
00:10:22,517 --> 00:10:24,686
-But you gotta give!
-I'll give. Jesus!

218
00:10:24,770 --> 00:10:26,897
-Do it now.
-I'll do it later. I promise.

219
00:10:26,980 --> 00:10:29,441
At least open the tab,
so I know you won't forget.

220
00:10:30,567 --> 00:10:32,277
-Calicocutpants.com.
-[Jeff] Yeah.

221
00:10:32,944 --> 00:10:35,322
Okay, there. I gotta get back to work.

222
00:10:35,405 --> 00:10:37,908
Hey, everybody, it's Rick here
from calicocutpants.com,

223
00:10:37,991 --> 00:10:41,495
and I want to thank you so much
for giving to our website.

224
00:10:41,578 --> 00:10:45,082
And if I'm being honest, this thing
has completely blown up in my face.

225
00:10:45,749 --> 00:10:47,834
This ain't my main gig, it's my side gig,

226
00:10:47,918 --> 00:10:50,379
and I can't really
get a hold of this on any end.

227
00:10:50,462 --> 00:10:51,296
[Jeff] What is this?

228
00:10:51,380 --> 00:10:54,091
-This is auto play.
-Things in my life are not going good.

229
00:10:54,174 --> 00:10:57,219
Rick explaining what's happening with
the company. Why it's important to give.

230
00:10:57,302 --> 00:10:59,513
I'm a dead man walking.
I got no time left.

231
00:10:59,596 --> 00:11:01,973
I'm only eating burgers,
the only thing I can afford.

232
00:11:02,057 --> 00:11:03,850
-How do you turn it down?
-Put the volume down.

233
00:11:03,934 --> 00:11:06,311
-[Jeff] It's not working.
-Try the little "X"!

234
00:11:07,062 --> 00:11:09,147
Quite simply, it's just like PBS.

235
00:11:09,231 --> 00:11:10,691
I didn't even ask to use it.

236
00:11:10,774 --> 00:11:13,860
But you did use it.
It helped you out of a jam with Glen.

237
00:11:13,944 --> 00:11:15,445
So now you gotta pay.

238
00:11:15,529 --> 00:11:17,781
-[Jeff] Hey!
-Hold that door! Hold that door!

239
00:11:25,372 --> 00:11:26,289
Give.

240
00:11:32,045 --> 00:11:34,798
Hey, Jeff, here's that thing
you asked for, that paper.

241
00:11:39,094 --> 00:11:40,137
You gotta give.

242
00:11:40,887 --> 00:11:43,724
-Man, I'm trying to work here.
-I told Rick you're a man of honor.

243
00:11:43,807 --> 00:11:46,518
And I owe Calico Cut Pants a lot.

244
00:11:46,601 --> 00:11:49,521
When my wife was in the hospital,
I was very distracted.

245
00:11:49,604 --> 00:11:52,023
I was taking four seconds
on a six-second piss

246
00:11:52,107 --> 00:11:54,359
and letting the last two seconds
straight down my leg.

247
00:11:54,943 --> 00:11:56,570
-What?
-And it helped to know

248
00:11:56,653 --> 00:11:58,530
I had the trapeze net of the site,

249
00:11:58,613 --> 00:12:01,241
so I could focus on
what I really needed to focus on,

250
00:12:01,324 --> 00:12:05,245
which is to be there for my wife
and answer the questions for the doctors.

251
00:12:05,328 --> 00:12:09,416
Like, what did she go near? Or on a hike,
did she walk too close to a tower?

252
00:12:09,499 --> 00:12:12,627
Or, I don't know, not this probably,
but did she eat a battery?

253
00:12:12,711 --> 00:12:15,964
Rick knew I wasn't gonna give that month,
and he barely hounded me.

254
00:12:16,047 --> 00:12:18,592
I'm sorry. What?
What was wrong with your wife?

255
00:12:18,675 --> 00:12:20,802
She had eaten a battery, a little battery,

256
00:12:20,886 --> 00:12:23,054
like a circle battery,
like a watch battery.

257
00:12:24,222 --> 00:12:25,056
Oh.

258
00:12:26,057 --> 00:12:27,684
-[Greg] You gotta give!
-[Jeff] Hey!

259
00:12:27,768 --> 00:12:30,896
If you use something and you don't give…

260
00:12:30,979 --> 00:12:31,813
[grunts]

261
00:12:34,483 --> 00:12:36,693
Give. To. The system.

262
00:12:37,527 --> 00:12:40,864
Hey, Debbie, what's going on?
You wore that dress yesterday.

263
00:12:54,127 --> 00:12:55,003
[mouths] My God.

264
00:13:05,931 --> 00:13:06,848
[sighs]

265
00:13:16,608 --> 00:13:17,776
I'm the Rock.

266
00:13:17,859 --> 00:13:21,238
Mike "The Rock" Davis from the W Doh W.

267
00:13:21,321 --> 00:13:24,908
If you used
calicocutpants.com and you don't pay,

268
00:13:24,991 --> 00:13:26,368
then you're the problem!

269
00:13:26,451 --> 00:13:31,540
And if you watch my matches,
then you know that I don't like problems!

270
00:13:31,623 --> 00:13:32,958
[roaring]

271
00:13:39,005 --> 00:13:39,840
[roaring stops]

272
00:13:40,590 --> 00:13:43,510
[tense music playing]

273
00:13:55,897 --> 00:13:56,857
There you are.

274
00:13:57,691 --> 00:13:58,650
Did you give?

275
00:14:00,318 --> 00:14:03,321
What the fuck?
Get the fuck off my shirt, man!

276
00:14:03,405 --> 00:14:04,531
This is mine!

277
00:14:04,614 --> 00:14:06,658
The volume on that video
wouldn't turn down.

278
00:14:06,741 --> 00:14:08,660
-Did you push volume down?
-Yes.

279
00:14:08,743 --> 00:14:11,913
I don't know what to tell you.
I don't do volume stuff. Did you give?

280
00:14:11,997 --> 00:14:14,457
No, don't send me videos
of loud wrestlers.

281
00:14:14,541 --> 00:14:16,543
When you donate, it doesn't go to that!

282
00:14:17,127 --> 00:14:19,754
-What?
-The money doesn't go to the video.

283
00:14:19,838 --> 00:14:21,923
Rick didn't pay Mike "The Rock" Davis

284
00:14:22,007 --> 00:14:24,968
to do that video with donation funds
like people are saying.

285
00:14:25,051 --> 00:14:27,012
Mike did that video for free.

286
00:14:27,095 --> 00:14:30,015
They grew up together,
Rick and Mike, on the same street.

287
00:14:30,098 --> 00:14:33,768
They lost their virginity the same night
at a party at the same house.

288
00:14:33,852 --> 00:14:35,729
What the fuck are you talking about?

289
00:14:35,812 --> 00:14:39,149
If your wife ever goes to the hospital,
you'll be happy you gave!

290
00:14:39,232 --> 00:14:40,650
[breathing heavily]

291
00:14:40,734 --> 00:14:43,445
She just keeps eating batteries.

292
00:14:43,528 --> 00:14:46,197
She says she's not eating them,
then we go to the doctor,

293
00:14:46,281 --> 00:14:48,825
the doctor says, "Yeah,
we found a battery in there."

294
00:14:48,909 --> 00:14:50,660
Yeah. Okay, fine, I'll give.

295
00:14:52,245 --> 00:14:54,039
-You owe me a new shirt, too.
-What?

296
00:14:54,122 --> 00:14:57,167
You hit me in the cup
and you grabbed my shirt.

297
00:14:57,250 --> 00:14:59,502
You stretched it out,
it looks like a bell now.

298
00:14:59,586 --> 00:15:03,214
-You can't do that!
-Okay, fine, I'll get you a new shirt.

299
00:15:03,298 --> 00:15:06,760
I wish I never told you
about calicocutpants.com.

300
00:15:06,843 --> 00:15:10,680
But your wife's rich,
so I'm going to bleed you dry.

301
00:15:10,764 --> 00:15:13,558
Now that I have the video
of you hitting me in the cup.

302
00:15:13,642 --> 00:15:15,560
What are you talking about,
you have a video?

303
00:15:15,644 --> 00:15:16,645
[tense music plays]

304
00:15:16,728 --> 00:15:19,064
Sean, the security guard…

305
00:15:22,150 --> 00:15:23,193
he gives.

306
00:15:25,195 --> 00:15:27,447
Kal, the IT guy…

307
00:15:28,782 --> 00:15:29,866
he gives.

308
00:15:31,242 --> 00:15:32,911
A lot of people give.

309
00:15:32,994 --> 00:15:34,287
[laughs maniacally]

310
00:15:34,955 --> 00:15:37,582
You can either be my friend or my enemy.

311
00:15:38,708 --> 00:15:40,919
A lot of people give.

312
00:15:42,796 --> 00:15:44,255
You hit me in the cup.

313
00:15:49,719 --> 00:15:51,763
[upbeat rock music playing]