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‪NETFLIX 原创剧集

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‪等一下

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‪-好了
‪-绕圈 亲爱的

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‪好 绕圈

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‪-好了
‪-再来嘛！

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‪现在好好享受吧 等孩子出生了
‪感觉就不一样了

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‪等一下

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‪哎呀！她踢我了

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‪-别 别拔出来！
‪-不行 拜托！

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‪-别拔出来！
‪-好 我不出来

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‪-好了
‪-对

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‪就是这样 对

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‪另外

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‪不管你的小弟弟有多大…

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‪它都不会穿过我的小妹妹

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‪对…

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‪-对…
‪-你确定…

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‪-确定！你想怎么用力干我都行！
‪-好！

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‪-不要停！
‪-好！

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‪-对！
‪-好！

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‪对！

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‪靠 亲爱的！

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‪亲爱的 我要射了！

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‪不要！想想你母亲什么的！

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‪不要停！

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‪你到了？太好了！

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{\an8}‪（根据伊丽莎白贝纳文特小说改编）

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‪（巴伦西亚、陆地、海洋）

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{\an8}‪哎呀…

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‪真是惊喜！

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{\an8}‪生日快乐 妈妈！

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‪（丽贝卡费里兹海纳斯医生）

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‪费尔南多！

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{\an8}‪-丽贝也在？
‪-对 她昨天来的

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‪她和杰米去海滩了

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‪我跟她说烈日对宝宝不好 可是…

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{\an8}‪-妈妈 她可是妇科医生！
‪-对…

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{\an8}‪-瓦莱里娅！
‪-嗨 爸爸

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‪阿德里安呢？

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‪别跟我说…

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‪你们要分开了？

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‪没有…

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‪工作怎么样？

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‪很好！一切都好

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{\an8}‪我们都四个月没见你了

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{\an8}‪你们也知道火车票很贵的

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{\an8}‪-你姐姐每半个月都会开车来
‪-而且她会在聊天群里跟我们说

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‪什么聊天群？

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{\an8}‪杰米…不久前刚建的群

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‪亲爱的 别拘束

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{\an8}‪剧名：蘑菇先生

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{\an8}‪（《傲慢与偏见》）

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‪（蘑菇先生）

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‪阿德里

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‪瓦尔 你该叫醒我的

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‪你睡得很熟 我不想打扰你

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‪你知道我会想和你一起去巴伦西亚的

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‪你不喜欢宿醉旅行

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‪要是我知道计划
‪我会在喝完第二轮金汤力后就离开

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‪我并没有提前计划

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‪那你醒来后
‪突然就想来个400公里的旅行？

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‪我睡不着觉

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‪我一闭上眼睛
‪就止不住看到劳拉奄奄一息的样子

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‪可恶 当然了…你被吓坏了

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‪你和劳拉聊过了吗？

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‪聊了

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‪她给我们发了信息
‪显然她对啤酒里的麸质过敏

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‪她说她要放弃啤酒改喝伏特加了

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‪对了 艾丽西亚给我打了电话

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‪3000个粉丝说
‪我应该弄个自己的YouTube频道

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‪做整理家务小贴士的内容！
‪你能想象我出名吗？

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‪不能

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‪抱歉

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‪抱歉

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‪你知道我在家人身边会是什么样

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‪那你为什么要去？

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‪…多多！

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‪-太棒了 岳母！
‪-拍好了

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‪-拍得好吗？
‪-不错

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‪再拍一张！

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‪-真的？
‪-真的！

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‪-是吗？
‪-好吧

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‪-拍吧
‪-好…

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‪再来一张 好的

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‪拍好了！

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‪-照片都拍得好吗？
‪-都很不错

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‪-有人要喝卡瓦酒吗？
‪-要！

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‪它产自圣阿德拉

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‪上次的事之后你又去那里了？

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‪她看到我们走进去时
‪表情是这样的！

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‪当然了！

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‪发生什么事了？

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‪-你知道你姐姐的！
‪-还有你母亲！

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‪不要说我！不要！

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‪（维克多）

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‪-公司打来的
‪-那就接啊

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‪不行

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‪这个周末我需要休息

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‪另外…我要送妈妈一份礼物

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‪-你的手机？
‪-不是 你看！

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‪点一下

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‪厄萨雷尔一家超级不错的
‪水疗店的消费券！

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‪他们有10多个水疗按摩浴缸！

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‪可是亲爱的 鉴于我的健康状况…

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‪我不觉得…

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‪热水对她的低血压不好

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‪他们也有按摩服务！

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‪既然聊到这个了
‪这是我们准备的礼物！

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‪会是什么礼物呢？

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‪我一定会喜欢的！

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‪有了这个礼物 你现在就可以
‪开始和你的外孙女建立感情了！

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‪-什么？
‪-真的！

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‪-我帮你设置一下吧？
‪-好！

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‪她能听到你说话
‪就像你和她都在我肚子里一样！

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‪-瓦莱里娅 把你手机借我用一下
‪-为什么？

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‪我的手机没有耳机接口

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‪你只需把它插到这里…谢谢 然后这样

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‪-这是那副耳机
‪-爸爸

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‪-妈妈 对着它说话
‪-这里吗？

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‪不 不是那个东西！

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‪-对着这个说话
‪-扬声器呢？

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‪它会在我的阴道里

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‪-是这个吗？
‪-是这个

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‪-好了
‪-那个在那边 你在这里说话

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‪-我们试试怎么样？
‪-在哪？

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‪-嗨 爸爸！
‪-嗨 美女！

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‪-嗨 美女！
‪-嗨 爸爸！

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‪妈咪

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‪昨晚我梦到

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‪你给我买了个小洋娃娃

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‪过来见见你的外甥女

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‪我才不要和你的阴道说话！

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‪真不敢相信你为了给妈妈过生日
‪给自己买了个假阳具！

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‪你怎么回事？这是最新产前科技产品

135
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‪你为什么不给她读读
‪你就要出版的书呢？

136
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‪-是啊 亲爱的！
‪-你从何时起成作家了？

137
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‪故事讲的是
‪一个叫蘑菇先生的超级英雄

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‪蘑菇先生？

139
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‪我本来要告诉你的 但你从来不回家…

140
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‪-玛尔 这是爸爸！
‪-嗨 爸爸！

141
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‪蘑菇先生 你喜欢海滩 对不对？

142
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‪“对！我喜欢待在海滩上！”

143
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‪“你会像我一样飞翔！”

144
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‪你真是太可怜了

145
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‪和食物玩就够无聊了的
‪但…为什么是蘑菇玩？

146
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‪他叫蘑菇先生 而且他是个超级英雄

147
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‪他会飞 还会吐硬币

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‪是吗？那我们看看
‪他是否能让我免于挨饿

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‪妈妈！

150
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‪丽贝卡吃了我的蘑菇先生！

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‪亲爱的 这就是食物的用途！

152
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‪用来吃的！

153
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‪蘑菇先生不是食物！他是超级英雄！

154
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‪他比哈利波特更强大！

155
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‪来 你们俩对着相机挥手！

156
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‪-我不要
‪-丽贝 那就你吧！

157
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‪-爸爸 你想让我跳舞吗？
‪-好啊！

158
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‪你到底怎么回事？

159
00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:08,880
‪-这就是一些随意的涂鸦！
‪-但它们给了你灵感！

160
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‪你为什么不能好好当个妇科医生呢？

161
00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:12,480
‪你有时候真的很不成熟

162
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‪你才不成熟呢！总是博关注

163
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‪我总做对的事情 这又不是我的错

164
00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:18,920
‪-是啊 我总做错事
‪-不是！

165
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:21,680
‪你脑子里想法太多
‪但你从不把任何一个坚持到底！

166
00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:27,880
‪你都没画完 你看！

167
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‪如果你不能完全投入的话
‪就干脆什么都别做

168
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‪说真的 我从来都没那么喜欢过他

169
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{\an8}‪（大卫比兹伯）

170
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‪对了 劳拉
‪你应该知道我在为你喝啤酒

171
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‪亲爱的 你还好吗？你吓坏我们了

172
00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:58,040
‪那…我猜你什么都不记得了吧？

173
00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:00,320
‪不是 你怎么会呢？

174
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:03,000
‪我发誓我当时以为你要死翘翘了

175
00:11:04,680 --> 00:11:06,120
‪听我说 尼雷亚…

176
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‪我很抱歉…你以为我们都不关心你

177
00:11:09,560 --> 00:11:10,840
‪其实不是这样的

178
00:11:11,520 --> 00:11:13,600
‪只是大家最近都很忙

179
00:11:13,680 --> 00:11:16,920
‪我们有时候没时间考虑别人

180
00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:20,640
‪卡门 你怎么样？

181
00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:23,280
‪你和Jay-Z的浪漫周末怎么样？

182
00:11:24,080 --> 00:11:26,880
‪好好玩 回来后跟我们好好说说

183
00:11:56,400 --> 00:11:57,360
‪你在撒尿吗？

184
00:11:57,880 --> 00:11:58,800
‪我在大便

185
00:11:58,880 --> 00:12:01,880
‪医生跟我说 等我排完所有麸质
‪就不会拉肚子了

186
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‪-你想看看吗？
‪-不想 你敢！

187
00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:05,360
‪劳拉！

188
00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:09,240
‪我看到你的信息很是惊讶

189
00:12:10,040 --> 00:12:10,880
‪为什么？

190
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‪因为你很擅长装蒜

191
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‪你宁可去巴伦西亚
‪和你父母及烦人的姐姐在一起

192
00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:17,480
‪也不愿面对在马德里发生的事

193
00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:21,320
‪你看见我们了？

194
00:12:21,680 --> 00:12:22,520
‪当然了

195
00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:24,120
‪场面那么温馨

196
00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:25,920
‪所以我才兴奋地昏了过去

197
00:12:29,360 --> 00:12:30,320
‪你还好吗？

198
00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:35,920
‪我总是忍不住想
‪和维克多一夜春宵会怎样

199
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‪好吧…

200
00:12:42,560 --> 00:12:43,400
‪让我想想

201
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‪不如你休息几天
‪回来后和阿德里谈谈？

202
00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:51,080
‪我都无法直视他的眼睛

203
00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:54,960
‪不过 一个吻并不算背叛 对吧？

204
00:12:57,240 --> 00:12:58,080
‪这个嘛…

205
00:12:58,200 --> 00:12:59,040
‪有点吧？

206
00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:00,480
‪可恶

207
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:04,800
‪我搭讪那两个加泰罗尼亚双胞胎时的
‪海滩酒吧还在吧？

208
00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:06,040
‪应该还在吧 怎么了？

209
00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:08,280
‪-明天1点我们在那里见
‪-劳拉 等…

210
00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:20,280
‪（维克多：你还好吧？和我说话）

211
00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:22,680
‪（抱歉 我现在不好
‪我改天再和你发信息）

212
00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:23,800
‪（我能打给你吗？）

213
00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:26,480
‪（你能给我一年时间吗？）

214
00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:29,760
‪（我需要消化之前发生的事）

215
00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:36,600
‪（好吧 倒计时开始了 再见）

216
00:13:45,440 --> 00:13:48,320
‪（你也许不记得我了
‪我是你一年前遇到的那个混蛋）

217
00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:51,040
‪（我刚从时间机器“德罗宁”里出来）

218
00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:57,120
{\an8}‪（抱歉 你认错人了）

219
00:14:00,160 --> 00:14:02,640
‪（你也许记得我
‪因为我长得像C坦戛纳）

220
00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:08,440
{\an8}‪（哦 对 你是…维克多？）

221
00:14:11,480 --> 00:14:13,040
‪（我这辈子最糟的一次接吻…）

222
00:14:14,600 --> 00:14:15,440
‪（彼此彼此）

223
00:14:18,280 --> 00:14:21,200
‪（祝贺你的畅销书
‪等一下 你从未写成）

224
00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:23,840
‪（混蛋…）

225
00:14:23,920 --> 00:14:26,160
‪（糟了！电池马上没电了
‪而且我还不在家！）

226
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:23,120
‪（大卫）

227
00:15:39,440 --> 00:15:40,520
‪杰米 把那个递给我

228
00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:44,360
‪两个字：“与茶碟配套”

229
00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:47,200
‪-茶杯！
‪-茶杯 没错

230
00:15:48,760 --> 00:15:51,480
‪艾塔娜的女儿也一样
‪她最后住进了精神病房

231
00:15:51,560 --> 00:15:53,560
‪请沿着我的大腿再往上

232
00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:55,840
‪妈妈 别这么大惊小怪的

233
00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:58,080
‪不 亲爱的 她才是大惊小怪的那个

234
00:15:58,520 --> 00:16:00,200
‪因为一个蘑菇小题大做

235
00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:01,480
‪你对她耐心点

236
00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:03,360
‪可是…

237
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:05,840
‪她对我们并不怎么耐心

238
00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:10,040
‪她总是试图完成超过自己能力的事
‪结果就是总会受挫

239
00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:13,320
‪我觉得她会离婚

240
00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:15,720
‪什么？你怎么知道？

241
00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:16,640
‪我了解她

242
00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:18,840
‪那个孩子对什么都会感到厌倦

243
00:16:19,640 --> 00:16:22,360
‪那…我们就看看她能否找到一个
‪能忍受她的人吧

244
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:29,800
‪我去海滩了！

245
00:16:35,440 --> 00:16:36,280
‪妈妈…

246
00:16:36,760 --> 00:16:38,320
‪-她听到我说的话了吗？
‪-妈妈…

247
00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:44,320
‪（啊 再来一杯莫吉托鸡尾酒）

248
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:00,480
‪早上好

249
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:04,680
‪-嗨
‪-嗨

250
00:17:05,360 --> 00:17:08,080
‪如果我说这纯属巧合 你信吗？

251
00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:10,120
‪不信

252
00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:13,360
‪很好 因为不是巧合
‪劳拉本来要来的 但她病得很重

253
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,640
‪我打给了你 想告诉你来着

254
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:20,880
‪13这个数字不吉利

255
00:17:25,360 --> 00:17:27,360
‪打给冒名顶替者

256
00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:34,960
‪我们可以聊聊发生的事吗？

257
00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:36,920
‪她肯定是腹腔病患者

258
00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:39,360
‪她一直在喝啤酒

259
00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:43,400
‪你因为亲了一个混蛋而吓坏了

260
00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:48,120
‪但那个混蛋知道
‪要不是因为那个腹腔病患者

261
00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:50,000
‪事情可能就失控了

262
00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:51,680
‪-是吗？
‪-是的

263
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:54,080
‪我喜欢你…

264
00:17:54,720 --> 00:17:55,600
‪你也喜欢我

265
00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:57,880
‪而且那个吻棒极了

266
00:17:59,920 --> 00:18:01,240
‪我需要想想

267
00:18:07,360 --> 00:18:09,480
‪我跟你说 我真想现在就起诉她

268
00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:11,720
‪就算她是我姐姐又如何？那是剽窃！

269
00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:14,840
‪如果有人应该写蘑菇先生的故事
‪那人也应该是我

270
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:17,240
‪-这就是你想要的？
‪-是的

271
00:18:17,920 --> 00:18:19,920
‪把你的创造力浪费在一个蘑菇上面？

272
00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:23,480
‪对 我知道这听上去很傻

273
00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:25,760
‪但那个蘑菇对我来说很重要

274
00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:29,120
‪我的家人不在乎对我重要的东西

275
00:18:29,560 --> 00:18:30,400
‪从来都是这样

276
00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:34,520
‪这可能只是你的看法
‪也许你从来没有帮助他们了解你

277
00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:41,680
‪它名叫大牙…

278
00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:43,600
‪它是一只鳄鱼

279
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:46,520
‪一个毛绒动物玩具
‪是我童年最好的朋友

280
00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:49,720
‪我爷爷从伦敦给我带回来的

281
00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:53,240
‪我们在哪住 它就跟到哪
‪我们去过很多地方

282
00:18:54,240 --> 00:18:55,760
‪我现在仍然相信…

283
00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:57,960
‪有天晚上我看到它动了

284
00:18:58,680 --> 00:19:01,400
‪看来不只我一人富有想象力

285
00:19:02,720 --> 00:19:05,920
‪它是我待在自己的房间里
‪玩上几个小时的完美借口

286
00:19:06,160 --> 00:19:08,080
‪那样我就不会听到我父母吵架

287
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:13,200
‪瞧？我想我也觉得自己有点被忽视了

288
00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:18,440
‪但随着时间的推移 我意识到
‪责怪他们…其实是跟自己过不去

289
00:19:23,080 --> 00:19:24,400
‪你想从我这里得到什么？

290
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:27,440
‪你呢？

291
00:19:32,600 --> 00:19:34,800
‪我觉得你进入我的生活是有目的的

292
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:36,640
‪是吗？什么目的？

293
00:19:37,520 --> 00:19:39,240
‪想当我的小说的主角…

294
00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:40,800
‪我永远不会写的

295
00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:42,040
‪你的情色小说

296
00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:47,400
‪那问题就大了
‪我不是你小说里的角色

297
00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:49,920
‪我就在这里

298
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:52,080
‪我哪都不会去

299
00:20:01,080 --> 00:20:01,920
‪妈妈？

300
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:04,080
‪爸爸？

301
00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:06,000
‪丽贝？

302
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:12,080
‪别去！

303
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:14,480
‪这里！你撒完尿就走

304
00:20:14,560 --> 00:20:15,520
‪-好的
‪-好吗？

305
00:20:35,680 --> 00:20:36,520
‪维克多！

306
00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:37,600
‪你要去哪？

307
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:39,480
‪维克多！

308
00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:42,960
‪不要！你在哪？

309
00:20:46,240 --> 00:20:48,080
‪-你在做什么？
‪-你以前留两个辫子

310
00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:49,600
‪对 快点 走了

311
00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:52,520
‪-我喜欢熔岩灯
‪-我会给你买一个 走吧

312
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:54,160
‪你支持比兹伯还是布斯塔曼特？

313
00:20:54,240 --> 00:20:55,880
‪这还用问？我永远支持切诺阿

314
00:20:55,960 --> 00:20:56,960
‪比赛最后怎么样？

315
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:02,720
‪不 其余的我都忘了

316
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:04,920
‪好了 别胡闹了 走吧

317
00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:07,280
‪你往家里带过几个男人？

318
00:21:09,720 --> 00:21:10,680
‪一般的数量吧

319
00:21:12,120 --> 00:21:13,720
‪“一般”这个说法非常主观

320
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:17,200
‪那我的“一般”是多少？

321
00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:18,320
‪数量很少

322
00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:20,880
‪你是这么想的？

323
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:22,520
‪最后一个来的是谁？

324
00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:23,880
‪阿德里安

325
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:25,040
‪看吧？

326
00:21:25,120 --> 00:21:26,520
‪你的性生活很压抑

327
00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:29,880
‪在他之前呢？

328
00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:34,400
‪米克尔

329
00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:38,760
‪我在阿德里安之前交往的男人

330
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:41,760
‪他当年是个帅小伙

331
00:21:43,200 --> 00:21:46,400
‪那个…因为当年只有17岁

332
00:21:47,480 --> 00:21:49,200
‪-你后悔吗？
‪-什么？

333
00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:51,120
‪那么年轻就结婚

334
00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:54,920
‪好吧…

335
00:21:55,360 --> 00:21:57,760
‪你的第一男朋友是谁？
‪第一个 非常幸运的那个

336
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:01,640
‪我班上的一个男生

337
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:04,680
‪他想当我的男朋友…

338
00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:08,000
‪想要亲我

339
00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:10,280
‪还想在公园里约会

340
00:22:10,360 --> 00:22:13,800
‪如果我是你的女朋友
‪那我还能和我的朋友们玩吗？

341
00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:17,600
‪当然可以 我们可以每天
‪在我们学校旁边的公园约会

342
00:22:18,840 --> 00:22:19,680
‪好的

343
00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:22,520
‪我一直都没去那个公园

344
00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:25,960
‪可怜的家伙 你伤了他的心

345
00:22:26,840 --> 00:22:28,680
‪冷静 我们当时还只是孩子

346
00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:29,840
‪那又怎样？

347
00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:31,640
‪年龄不重要

348
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:34,680
‪人在三岁时就能疯狂地爱上某个人

349
00:22:35,680 --> 00:22:36,520
‪是啊

350
00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:38,120
‪一些东西更重要

351
00:22:39,120 --> 00:22:39,960
‪什么东西？

352
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:43,320
‪比如说魔力

353
00:22:45,520 --> 00:22:46,520
‪连结

354
00:22:48,120 --> 00:22:50,080
‪但有一样东西很重要

355
00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:52,080
‪你知道是什么吗？

356
00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:53,440
‪什么？

357
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:54,720
‪熔岩灯

358
00:22:57,360 --> 00:22:58,200
‪可恶

359
00:22:58,600 --> 00:22:59,440
‪妈妈？

360
00:23:01,440 --> 00:23:02,400
‪是阿德里

361
00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:04,160
‪你一句话都别说

362
00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:07,040
‪来了！

363
00:23:10,080 --> 00:23:12,680
‪你穿过花园
‪等他一进来就离开 好吗？

364
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:13,720
‪对不起

365
00:23:26,720 --> 00:23:28,720
‪-你怎么来了？
‪-你怎么来了？

366
00:23:29,120 --> 00:23:32,440
‪我跟你说了 如果我错过她的生日
‪她会杀了我的

367
00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:37,080
‪瓦尔 从我认识你以来
‪你从来都没听过你妈一句话

368
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:41,520
‪我知道 但我想她还能活的年头有限…
‪你开车来的？

369
00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:43,480
‪是的 我租了一辆车

370
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:46,960
‪我想听一些好听的音乐…
‪帮我清空头脑

371
00:23:47,040 --> 00:23:49,040
‪-那些陷阱音乐都让我脑袋炸了
‪-很好

372
00:23:49,120 --> 00:23:50,560
‪-你父母呢？
‪-我不知道

373
00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:52,880
‪你喝酒了吗？

374
00:23:53,640 --> 00:23:55,000
‪我喝了一杯莫吉托鸡尾酒

375
00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:56,160
‪一杯？

376
00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:57,720
‪我想不止一杯吧？

377
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:02,520
‪瓦尔 你没事吧？

378
00:24:03,520 --> 00:24:05,440
‪没事 你也知道我回家后会变怎样…

379
00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:07,000
‪-对 你回家后会变怎样
‪-对

380
00:24:08,360 --> 00:24:10,080
‪你的行为很异常 我了解你

381
00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:17,800
‪只是因为回到家
‪就像活在电影里的闪回镜头里一样

382
00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:18,840
‪对…

383
00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:22,160
‪每当我回到这里 我都会意识到
‪自己这辈子一直在犯同意的错误

384
00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:26,720
‪什么错误？

385
00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:37,880
‪谢谢你过来

386
00:24:57,440 --> 00:24:58,640
‪可恶

387
00:24:59,240 --> 00:25:00,160
‪不要紧

388
00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:02,560
‪阿德里 没事的

389
00:25:03,360 --> 00:25:05,040
‪说真的 不用…

390
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:09,320
‪阿德里 我没事

391
00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:12,080
‪我没事

392
00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:19,840
{\an8}‪（大卫比兹伯）

393
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:37,800
‪然后你要非常小心地把这个插入阴道

394
00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:40,480
‪-然后对着这里说话
‪-好

395
00:25:41,320 --> 00:25:43,360
‪-好棒的礼物！
‪-是啊

396
00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:44,400
‪亲爱的 这样行吗？

397
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:51,320
‪那你们两个也该订购一台这样的机子

398
00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:54,080
‪-还是你们要再等等？
‪-妈 不要提这事

399
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,160
‪怎么…你们还没有考虑过这件事？

400
00:25:57,240 --> 00:25:58,120
‪-当然有
‪-没有

401
00:25:59,120 --> 00:26:00,280
‪我们从没谈过这件事

402
00:26:00,960 --> 00:26:04,400
‪我不是说我们谈过
‪我是说我考虑过…我愿意要孩子

403
00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:05,960
‪你从什么时候起想要孩子了？

404
00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:10,160
‪瓦尔 我现在不想要孩子
‪但是我不排除这种可能性

405
00:26:10,240 --> 00:26:11,080
‪是啊

406
00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:12,320
‪你呢？

407
00:26:14,120 --> 00:26:15,840
‪-妈 孩子刚才踢我了
‪-什么？

408
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:17,720
‪-妈！
‪-你看 特蕾莎

409
00:26:18,880 --> 00:26:19,720
‪还真是！

410
00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:24,200
‪-亲爱的 没错！
‪-疼吗？

411
00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:44,280
‪这里说的也一样

412
00:26:45,560 --> 00:26:48,400
‪不 我会问问我的产前检查组
‪以防万一

413
00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:51,000
‪可是亲爱的 这可是BBC
‪天哪 我也不知道

414
00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:53,680
‪但BBC对温奶器了解多少？

415
00:26:53,760 --> 00:26:55,640
‪拜托 这可是BBC

416
00:26:55,920 --> 00:26:57,760
‪它是经过科学证明的

417
00:26:58,080 --> 00:26:59,920
‪你不该了解这个东西吗？

418
00:27:01,600 --> 00:27:03,080
‪他们这样真的是你想要的吗？

419
00:27:03,360 --> 00:27:05,560
‪他们令人无法忍受
‪不过我们会做得更好

420
00:27:05,640 --> 00:27:07,920
‪我养死的植物
‪比亚洲一次海啸杀死的还多

421
00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:09,560
‪我应付不了孩子

422
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:11,680
‪你只是现在这么说

423
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:15,360
‪要是我一直都是这么想的呢？

424
00:27:15,640 --> 00:27:17,640
‪我觉得你会改变主意的

425
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:21,120
‪我不希望我们成为那种

426
00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:23,640
‪想通过生孩子解决问题的夫妇

427
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:30,880
‪所以我们仍处在关系低潮期

428
00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:34,800
‪瓦尔 你想要我怎样？

429
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:38,000
‪你呢？

430
00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:41,960
‪我想我们俩都希望对方会改变

431
00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:44,880
‪我在努力 我在努力变得不那么死板
‪变得更加…

432
00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:46,080
‪思想开明

433
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:50,640
‪我甚至在考虑
‪开始做那个疯狂的YouTube频道

434
00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:53,680
‪若你把自己看作YouTube主播…

435
00:27:54,120 --> 00:27:56,080
‪你要想想他们会把你做成什么表情包

436
00:27:58,560 --> 00:28:01,480
‪瓦尔 假如我们解决了问题
‪我想成为一个父亲…

437
00:28:01,840 --> 00:28:02,680
‪我是认真的

438
00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:05,240
‪你愿意成就我吗？

439
00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:11,280
‪我累了 我们上床睡觉吧

440
00:29:07,400 --> 00:29:10,760
‪你才28岁 你不能因为一个蘑菇
‪就不再和你姐说话

441
00:29:11,880 --> 00:29:12,840
‪不只是因为这件事

442
00:29:18,640 --> 00:29:19,920
‪我是有点自命不凡

443
00:29:20,200 --> 00:29:21,040
‪我承认这点

444
00:29:21,600 --> 00:29:22,640
‪不过就一点点

445
00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:26,240
‪但我从未阻止过你做你想做的事

446
00:29:29,800 --> 00:29:32,440
‪瓦尔 你一直都有很棒的想法 一直

447
00:29:32,920 --> 00:29:34,560
‪但你都把想法存在了脑子里

448
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:36,200
‪你需要选一个 然后付诸行动

449
00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:39,400
‪我基本上就是这么做的
‪但他们拒绝了我的小说

450
00:29:46,280 --> 00:29:47,720
‪我也害怕

451
00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:49,720
‪我害怕当妈妈

452
00:29:50,400 --> 00:29:52,240
‪但一切都在你的掌控之中

453
00:29:52,480 --> 00:29:55,000
‪问题就在这里 我是个控制狂

454
00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:58,360
‪我女儿讨厌我的可能性非常大

455
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:01,960
‪这倒是真的 我从没想到这点

456
00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:03,120
‪可怜的小姑娘！

457
00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:09,200
‪我知道杰米会是最受喜爱的家长

458
00:30:09,480 --> 00:30:10,760
‪过度纵容孩子的父亲

459
00:30:10,960 --> 00:30:13,080
‪这样的话 你就头一次当第二了

460
00:30:16,640 --> 00:30:18,160
‪但这并不代表我不会尝试

461
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:26,640
‪你不害怕孩子会破坏你的婚姻吗？

462
00:30:33,480 --> 00:30:35,040
‪但我觉得这样值得

463
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:43,120
‪你和阿德里遇到问题了吗？

464
00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:47,760
‪可以说我们现在的关系很糟

465
00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:51,000
‪我没法像你一样掌控一切

466
00:30:52,360 --> 00:30:53,640
‪他有外遇了？

467
00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:57,480
‪那是怎么了？

468
00:30:59,360 --> 00:31:01,040
‪没什么

469
00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:18,760
{\an8}‪这位是何塞米格尔加里多
‪“慢生活”项目中的牧羊人

470
00:31:19,040 --> 00:31:20,560
‪你的羊都是什么种类的？

471
00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:23,920
‪我们主要有白色凯尔特伊比利亚山羊

472
00:31:24,160 --> 00:31:28,080
‪然后有一些白色塞拉诺斯羊
‪还有黑色塞拉诺斯羊…

473
00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:44,120
‪嗨 玛尔

474
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:46,680
‪你能听到我说话吗？

475
00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:48,840
‪我是你的姨妈

476
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:53,280
‪很抱歉之前我没有作自我介绍

477
00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:56,160
‪因为在你出生之前 我希望

478
00:31:56,240 --> 00:31:57,400
‪能成为更好的自己

479
00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:00,200
‪但我觉得这事一时半会儿不会发生

480
00:32:03,320 --> 00:32:04,160
‪听我说…

481
00:32:04,440 --> 00:32:05,560
‪我…

482
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:07,360
‪我真的爱阿德里

483
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:09,920
‪他也爱我

484
00:32:11,120 --> 00:32:12,600
‪但我们变了很多…

485
00:32:13,760 --> 00:32:16,120
‪或许我们一直都是这样的

486
00:32:17,720 --> 00:32:20,120
‪只可惜我没在婚礼上拿到

487
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:21,720
‪可以学习如何处理此事的手册

488
00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:23,360
‪但是…

489
00:32:23,560 --> 00:32:25,880
‪我有可能永远都不会读完它

490
00:32:28,520 --> 00:32:29,560
‪总之…

491
00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:34,160
‪我只希望你遇事能比我看得更明白

492
00:32:36,640 --> 00:32:37,480
‪对了…

493
00:32:38,560 --> 00:32:40,560
‪我想让你第一个知道：

494
00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:43,360
‪我要写一部小说

495
00:33:29,200 --> 00:33:30,080
‪瓦尔

496
00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:32,000
‪走吗？

497
00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:42,440
‪阿德里
‪我不会因为你的要求就生孩子

498
00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:44,880
‪我又要开始写我的小说了

499
00:33:53,800 --> 00:33:54,640
‪再见

500
00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:56,840
‪谢谢你能来

501
00:33:56,920 --> 00:33:59,280
‪安全驾驶 路上总是有疯子

502
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:00,200
‪行了 爸爸

503
00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:01,920
‪不用担心

504
00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:03,880
‪-到家了我给你们打电话 好吗？
‪-好的

505
00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:08,280
‪瓦尔 你确定
‪不想和我一起回马德里吗？

506
00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:12,280
‪我更愿意在这里开始我的小说
‪不过我过几天就坐火车回去

507
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:14,440
‪好吧 亲一下

508
00:34:15,560 --> 00:34:16,400
‪钥匙

509
00:34:17,240 --> 00:34:19,440
‪-再见！
‪-一路平安！

510
00:34:39,760 --> 00:34:41,880
‪（蘑菇先生）

511
00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:33,560
‪（海滩空无一人）

512
00:35:33,640 --> 00:35:36,160
‪（他们决定去散步）

513
00:35:36,240 --> 00:35:38,840
‪（为了实现我的幻想
‪我们只需要赤身裸体）

514
00:35:38,920 --> 00:35:42,440
‪（我扭动着臀部
‪温柔地抚摸着自己）

515
00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:44,880
‪（留下了幽灵般的足迹）

516
00:35:45,880 --> 00:35:47,160
‪（离开并想着我）

517
00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:13,400
‪字幕翻译：郑伟