Hi, welcome to a very special episode of Almost Never, where the
Wonderland and Girls Here First are going
head-to-head in an Almost Never Battle of the Bands.
I'm Tillie, and I play Chloe in the show,
but today's episode is all about how well you know the show
and each other. So, who's ready?
Are we ready, people? THEY CHEER
OK, I can see you guys have brought mascots.
THE one and only Henry Pickles!
I've never been away from home for this long. I need my Henry Pickles!
You're a role model now. Nothing is allowed to disturb this tour.
No, Sasha, don't!
So, tell me about your mascot. Why did you choose him?
Well, Henry Pickles has, like, been a big part of my life
and then GHF...'s life. And GHF's life. Yeah, you said it right.
And, well, basically, we think this is going to bring us
loads of luck, because he couldn't come on tour with us,
and the tour went to shambles, so if he's here with us, he's going
to bring us luck. I like your theory! Whoo!
Right, OK, Wonderland, go on, don't be shy. Show us your mascot.
So, basically, for Christmas,
Harry gave me this bad boy,
and this is the best thing he's ever done for me.
That's our mascot for today.
So you got me a monkey? I didn't get you anything.
Ooh! You shouldn't have!
Why are you looking at me?
It's secret Santa. Anyone could have got you that.
The same as anyone could have got me this...
..identical twin monkey.
Good one, Oak.
He hasn't got a name. Quickly, make a name up on the spot. Go.
Stephen. Go...Stephen! Interesting name, but OK.
Good luck to both teams. It's now time for Almost Never
Battle of the Bands, the Wonderland versus Girls Here First,
in who knows the most things about Almost Never.
Are you ready, guys? We've got this. We've got this!
I hope you're ready. I hope you've been studying.
There's not an actual prize. Oh... Fame? Fame!
And the, er, really bad news is that...the person who loses...
..I'm going to be showing the clips
of your audition tapes to be in Almost Never.
That's disgusting! You can't do that!
Yeah, I'm really, really sorry. That's not a joke. I'm not sorry.
That's so rude. But we're going to win, so it's fine.
I'm just going to leave you with that thought. So, play wisely, guys.
That's OK. It is Battle of the Bands, so battle it out, guys.
That's all I'm saying. Let's get on with the quiz, shall we?
Round one is called Were You Paying Attention?
So, I'm going to ask each team in turn a question from scenes
you were in. Let's hope you were... paying attention.
Let's do it! Let's go! Let's go!
Louder! So, this is for you. The Wonderland are going first.
In episode six, The Middle Eight,
Harry decides to play a special instrument. What is it called?
Oh, you know. The...
Is it the bum-bum bum bum-bum-bum?
Oh, my gosh! Do we need the actual name of the instrument?
You need the name or something similar, because it is very tough.
Weird name. But you did play it, come on, so you should know this.
You should know every instrument.
The xylophone... No, it's not. Wait, what episode is this?
A xylophone?! Sorry, wait, rewind, guys. A xylophone?!
Even I know this. You're the music man.
Yeah, cos you've got the answer!
She's like, "Even I know this"!
Channel it. Channel it. Harry, you were the one playing it.
I barely played it, OK? The... No, it's not saxophone.
He said, "Saxophone"!
Five...
TILLIE AND GIRLS: ..four... Bango. No! ..three... "Bango"?!
..two...
Bahongas. ..two and a half...
The bong! The bong. The bong.
..one.
We're not going with a "bahong"!
Run the clip, run the clip, run the clip. Oh, no!
Is that takeaway? Great!
No, they're bonang. Javanese drums.
Whoa, this one sounds like noodles!
Your voice is so high!
So, guys, the answer was the Javanese drums, a bonang.
The Javanese drum. Bonang.
So, back to Girls Here First. In the Stadium Show episode,
Harry has to leave rehearsals because he's late for what?
Chess club. I don't know. Is it?
Roll the clip. Roll the clip.
Last one, lads. Sounding tight.
I've got to go. I'm going to
be late for chess club.
GIRLS CHEER THEY CHANT: GHF! GHF!
Right, OK. Also in episode nine, the Chicken episode,
Oakley decides what he would want as a superpower. What is it?
SHE SINGS DRAMATIC MUSIC
I'm so good! You know it? It's to have cakes as hands.
Argh!
Roll it.
If you could have any superpower, what would it be, and why?
The ability to catch a cockerel?
That's rubbish. I'd have cakes for hands.
They grow back when you eat them. Yeah, that's so much more useful...!
That is a very big throwback, and you got it in one.
No hesitation there, guys. Did you see he knew straight away?
Straight away! OK, question, though.
Oakley, if you had a superpower in a real life...what would it be? Go!
I would say for Mr Stephen the monkey to come alive. OK...
Cool. Right. Miri? Fire powers. So I could just, like...
"Fire"! So, what would you do with your fire power?
So, like, I can, like, instantly cook chicken or...
Er, so you're using it for the good, for good? For good!
So, question for Girls Here First. In the # Do The Fandango! #...
..Oakley shows Fabio the Oakley Dance.
What was Fabio's one-word reaction?
I don't know what the word is, but he...
A-mahzing! Yes! A...mahzing!
Aaaaa..... A-mahzing!
DANCE MUSIC PLAYS Whoo! Ooh! Brrr!
Brrr! You can join in on the next one, OK?
Whoa! Come on, Fabio, come on, join in.
Whoo! Brrr!
Whoa! MUSIC STOPS
I can lose the sound effects, if you want me to. That was...
..a-mahzing.
Well, Girls Here First, that was... ALL: A-mahzing!
For a bonus point for the Wonderland...
..Oakley, show us the Oakley.
For a bonus point. Do it. Bonus point. Go.
Oaky, can I help?
You can improvise. It was a lot of legs and a lot of arms.
Oh, what, the whole thing? No, no, no! The Oakley's just a move.
I just want to see the bits where the hips don't lie.
Do you know what I mean?
No, this is the Oakley, the one where it goes...
Oh, yeah! THEY LAUGH
Do the arm one, where it goes... OK. Go.
Sound effects, too. Whoo! Whoo!
I don't know the next bit! Spin on the floor.
Oakley, you're not dedicated enough. I'm dedicated to this bit.
MUSIC STOPS Bonus!
Bonus point! Whoo-whoo-whoo! Bonus point to the Wonderland.
It was a-mahzing!
So, this one is quite awkward for me. Erm...
In The Sound Of The Silence, Chloe tries out an awkward rap,
but what's her rap name?
I know it, I know it, I know it! Which they also teased her with.
It's Rapzilla, isn't it? Rapzilla.
Rapzilla! I really don't want to run this clip, and I really...
Run the clip! Run the clip! Run the clip!
# My name is Rapzilla Nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh... #
# Yo, my name's Rapzilla Always talk billa
# When I step up on the mic, The dance floor, it fill up
# Cos my beats are sick But my rhymes are iller
# A one-off, original Cute like a chinchilla! #
You all right, Chloe?
Yep! Cool. Fine and dandy. Are we good to get started, then, yeah?
Yeah.
Are you sure you're all right?
Yeah.
Rapzilla?
That was legendary! THEY CHEER
Oakley had to do the Oakley.
I think it's fair!
It's only fair, yeah.
Well, you're going to have to drop a beat.
THEY BEATBOX
# Yo, my name's Rapzilla I don't know the rest of the words
# But I'm cute like a chinchilla! #
HOOTER BLARES
Right, OK. Saddle up, guys.
Also in Sound Of The Silence, Harry finally builds up the courage
to ask out Tyra. When she turns him down, what does Harry do?
What does he do? I remember. I remember.
He does that weird, like, handshake. Oh, no, he, erm...
..he grabs my elbow. Or he punches me in the arm, I can't remember.
Oh, yeah, he does that and then he shakes the arm like that.
But what..? Does he say something then walks away?
And then what does he say, for a bonus point?
Oh! He goes like that and he says, like, "Konnichiwa." Konnichiwa!
Run the clip!
I think you're awesome. Please be my girlfriend.
Harry...
This is my boyfriend, Zayn.
Awkward! Oh, the Zaynmeister!
Yo, man. Do you know him? Dude, everyone knows the Zayn Machine.
Why didn't anyone tell me Tyra had a boyfriend?
I thought you knew. Everyone knows. Yeah.
Yeah. Everyone knows.
Thank you, Harry. Erm, I'm flattered, really.
I wasn't being serious! No... It was a joke. It was a joke.
It was a joke. Everyone, it was a joke! It was a joke.
Erm, anyway, I've got people to see, places to go, so, er, bye? Yeah.
Konnichiwa? Zayn...
GIRLS CHEER
So, guys, because you give me such a specific answer, you give me
the grab of the arm, the punch of the arm and the konnichiwa,
you got three points! Three points! Whoo!
Girls Here First, you're on five points.
The Wonderland, you're on three. Whoo!
THEY CHEER
And remember, everybody, the people who lose, I'm going to be showing
your original clips for when you auditioned to be in Almost Never.
The whole shebang.
That's not funny. So we're not losing. It's fine.
No, no, no, no, no!
Right, time for round two. It's called Freeze Frame.
Everybody show me your freeze poses. Go.
So, I'm going to play you a clip, then I'm going to freeze
the frame, and all you have to do is tell me what happens next.
So if you think you know, lift up your paddle.
Yeah? Yeah. Got it? OK. So, first question. Are we ready? Whoo!
Let's do it. Run the clip.
Anyone for a canape? Thanks, Tyra.
Mm!
Easy, tiger!
Oh, I'm sorry, I'm going to have to give that to the Wonderland.
That was a clean Wonderland win.
So, erm, I choke on my food. I actually can't remember what it's
called, but I choke on it and it goes just like that.
You choke on your canapes, duck. Canapes. And it goes all over
Tyra's face. Shall we check?
We shall check. I'm going to enjoy checking this.
We did this way too many times.
HE COUGHS
ALL GROAN
I'll tell you something funny about that scene.
The way they did it, Harry was actually spitting it out,
but when the shot was on Tyra... There was glass. ..there was a
make-up lady, and she had, like, all that horrible gunk in her hand.
It was literally in her hand, and she was, like... Throwing it at you.
This is not the first time you've had something lobbed at your face.
Shall we talk about the Christmas special?
We're having fun, aren't we?
Oh! Oh...
It's really fun. That was pretty fun.
I'm so, so sorry, Tyra. Let me get that off for you.
Oh, no, I've made it worse. Er...
It's all right, AJ, at least I won't have to eat later.
Well done, Wonderland. And, erm, good back story, Nate.
Thank you very much. Run the next clip.
DANCE MUSIC PLAYS
I love this bit.
Me! I honestly don't know who that was first. VAR! VAR!
It was us. Slow motion!
I'm going to need a slow-motion replay, please.
Me! I honestly don't know who that was first.
Right... Whoo! I think, from watching the slow-mo...
..it was Girls Here First. Tell me your answer.
Oakley and Nate do a very special dance move... Cartwheel.
..where they do like a cartwheel, and Nate smiles at the camera.
Yeah. Let's have a look at the clip.
See? We knew it. We just wanted to make sure everyone got a chance to
see it. That slow-mo is dodgy. Well done, GHF.
That's another point for you guys,
so let's go straight to the next question.
SHE SINGS QUIETLY I didn't know you could sing.
You should totally be in a band.
I could never do that. I get nervous just singing in the shower.
Yeah! I had that. I had that. That was us... Er...
Wonderland, I'm giving that to you. What happens next?
Tyra says she only sings in the shower, and Harry says,
"I can help you with that." Yeah. Bit awkward.
Bit awkward. Bit awkward. Run the clip!
I could help with that!
The nerves part. Not the shower part.
Well, that wasn't creepy at all...!
Aww! Looks like lurve!
Well done, Wonderland, you got it right!
Do you still love me, Harry? No, no, can we just, like,
process that my own brothers literally broke my heart?
That's actually broken. You just broke it.
I don't know which is more awkward.
The broken heart. That's more awkward.
Right, anyway... M-M-Moving on...
Erm, run the clip.
PHONE RINGS
Hurry up. There's going to be a riot.
All right. Don't worry.
When have I ever let you down?
Ohhh! That was tight. That was us. That was very, very, very...
I'm so good on the paddle! Tyra, your paddle skills are top-notch,
girl. Tell me what you think happens next.
What happens next is Nate is a very silly,
silly boy and he drops his phone into a cowpat.
Let's have a look!
GIRLS CHEER
Whoops. "Whoops" what?
You've fallen in a...cowpat.
A cowpat?!
GIRLS GROAN
I've got to know - was that a real cowpat?
I'm going to say that it was in fact real poo.
GROANING
Of course it wasn't!
Yeah, what was that, actually? Cos we know... I think it was toffee.
Or fudge or something like that.
It smelt, actually, quite nice, didn't it? It did smell very nice.
SHE GROANS Nathaniel! It wasn't real poo!
Girls Here First, you got that point fair and square.
Whoo! So at the end of that round, the scores on the screen...
..GHF, you're staying in the lead!
Losers! Losers!
Awww! That's not very nice. That's not nice.
That's just below the belt. That's immature.
The next round is called Know You Best.
I'm going to ask each team a number of quickfire
questions about how well you know each other.
I've also asked the opposing team for their predictions.
So, for example, if I ask the Wonderland, "Who smells of soap?"...
..they'd point to Harry. No, but Nate has 40-minute showers.
Fair enough. And then if GHF predicted that you would point at
Harry, they get a point. Oh! Get it? Right?
Get it. And remember, everybody, what you're playing for.
If you lose, I get to show you clips from your Almost Never audition.
Whoa... GHF, you're going first. You ready?
Yeah. Yeah. 60 seconds on the clock, please.
Right, time starts after my first question.
Who's the best at learning lines?
Me. Who's longest in make-up?
Lola! Who takes longest to get ready in the morning?
Lola. Who watches the most TV?
Lola. Er, Lilly.
Who's the most annoying?
Lilly. Me! Who talks the most?
Me. Tyra. Yeah. Who's the funniest?
Miri. Miri. Who's the loudest?
Miri! Who's the hardest worker?
Miri.
Who has the best taste in music?
Me. Tyra. Who complains the most?
Lola? Lola! Who's the most stylish?
Me. Lola? Who's always on time?
Not me. Miri! No, Tyra.
Who's the laziest?
Lola!
Who takes the longest to get ready?
Lola! Who's the most organised?
Tyra. Who gives the best advice?
Miri.
Who is most likely to pull a push door?
Me! Lilly!
Who's the most...? HOOTER BLARES
Time's up! Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding! That was rubbish!
Well done, GHF, some pretty brutal home truths there.
Wonderland, are you ready? Yeah, let's do it, let's go.
60 seconds on the clock, please.
Who's the best at learning lines?
Harry.
Who sits the longest in make-up?
Me. Nate.
Who takes longest to get ready in the morning?
Me. Nate. Who watches TV the most?
Harry. Harry. Who's the most annoying?
Harry! Who talks the most?
Harry. Harry. Who's the funniest?
Harry. Oakley, I'd say.
Who's the loudest?
Harry. Nate. Me. Me, me.
Who's the hardest worker?
Oakley.
Who has the best taste in music?
Me, fo' sure! No, Oakley.
Who complains the most?
Er, me. Harry. Who's the most stylish?
Oakley. I'd say Harry.
Who's always on time?
Er, who what, sorry? Who's always on time?
Er, Nate. No, no! Never me!
I'd say Oakley. OK, me.
Who's the laziest?
Me. Nate. Nate. Who takes the longest to get ready?
Nate. Nate. Who's the most organised?
Oakley. Actually, no, yeah, Oakley. Who gives the best advice?
Harry. Harry?!
Who is most likely to pull a push door?
Harry. Harry.
HOOTER BLARES Right, ding-ding-ding,
time is up. 60 seconds over. I can confirm...
..that the girls knew more about the boys than the boys
knew about the girls!
So, guys, Wonderland, how are you feeling?
Talk to me. Talk to me. It's OK, you can talk to me.
Very sad.
Stephen? How is he feeling? Again, he doesn't really have a brain.
That was my one wish, remember? Oh, yeah. Yeah... He's OK. Yeah.
It's all right, Stephen. He looks happy enough.
Yeah, he's hanging in there.
Well, that's all the questions we've got time for, and I can tell
you, from doing some quick maths and adding up all the scores today...
..the winners are...
Can I get a bit of atmosphere, please, guys? Oh, nervous!
..GHF!
# Let's make tonight a classic... #
Ohhh! You know what's coming, don't you, boys?
We're going to see the actual audition tapes, people.
You guys are about to see my face going red.
Let's do it, let's do it, let's do it, let's do it! Roll the clip!
Hi, my name's Nathaniel Dass, I'm 15 years old.
Er, some of my interests are...
..sport - I like to play tennis and hockey...
I love music, I listen to music all the time.
I play piano, I sing, I love dancing and I do some acting,
as well, cos I went to drama school previously,
but I stopped just cos of exams.
Some of my favourite things to do are go out with my friends,
go to the cinema, go shopping for clothes.
Like, clothes are my most favourite thing in the world. I love shoes...
GIRLS LAUGH
Are you doing anything tonight? INTERVIEWER: Are you asking me out?
No. No, erm, me and the band, we're rehearsing later.
I was thinking we could use some sort of social media voice.
TILLIE: Nate, you're really good!
More thinking you could be our social media manager.
Do you pay expenses? We could stretch to a packet of Jaffa Cakes.
Make it two packs of Jaffas and I'll think about it.
You're better there! Can I tell you what? I'll tell you a funny story.
I had an outfit change, cos I watched the video back
and got really stressed. Looking at it, I was like, "I don't like it."
I had a big strop for, like, an hour. Was there a family argument?
I got changed, and my mum had to, like, proper convince me
so that I'd come back and do it.
Good thing she did! Yeah. Here we are. Next video!
I'm excited for this one!
I'm Oakley Orchard, I'm 14 years old and I'm from Bristol.
LAUGHTER AND SHOUTING
What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you?
Erm, I was walking down the street one day from primary school
and I was desperate for a wee, and my mum said that
I could just have a little bit in my pants, so I sort of let one go.
OK.
I mean, coming second in the biggest music show on TV?
Who wouldn't want to be in our position?
Maybe the band that beat us.
Well, whatever happens next, being put together with you two was
the best thing that's ever happened to me.
I don't know why you cringe about that. That's really good.
Wow, that accent! Oh, my gosh!
We know who is last, baby! It's the one and only... No, that's the end!
No, no, no, no, no, it's not. It's just the beginning!
It's just the beginning.
Hi, I'm Harry Still. I'm 14 years old.
OK, so, the most embarrassing thing that's probably ever happened
to me was when I started Year 7 and I was really, really small.
My bag was basically the same size as me.
And I was on my way to school,
I went up to the top of the stairs and there was no seats,
so I stood on the stairs, and all of a sudden the bus came to a stop,
like a really sharp stop, and cos I wasn't holding on, I flew back,
and the bag got wedged between the sides of the wall of the stairs.
And I look like a turtle, cos I'm stuck like that on the edge
and everyone's laughing at me. So, yeah, I'd say that was the most
embarrassing thing that's happened to me.
ALL: Awww!
# And it's still not fair when you shock me, pretending to know
# And I swear
# I am not ashamed to be who I am
# We all feel lost sometimes
# And we don't know where to go
# We can try to We need to rock and roll... #
Wow. Oh, that was so good!
I can definitely see why you all got the part.
Well done to our winners, bad luck to our losers.
Hope you enjoyed Battle of the Bands.
Make sure to catch up on all three series of Almost Never
on BBC iPlayer. Whoo!
Right now, a very special treat to end the series,
a live performance of Good Time from our very own supergroup,
the Girls Here First Wonderland. We'll see you soon!
One, two, three, four...
# Maybe I ain't got to feel this way
# Maybe this ain't how I'm supposed to take it
# Cos, baby, I can't take another day, no, no
# If I coulda had things my way
# What I got to do to make you stay, girl?
# When you're gone, I got so much pain, oh, no, no
# Cos, baby, I ain't good at lying
# I can't hold it in, no, no
# Got to show you how I really feel
# Can't let you walk out that door
ALL: # Cos I...
# ..been thinking about you
# Can't get you off my mind
# And you know it's true
# I don't want to put a downer on a good time
# But I can't think about you not being all mine
# So will you
# Will you
# Come and talk so we can be like we were before?
# This is all I think about, I cannot ignore
# Something so true
# I want to be waking up with you
# Maybe this ain't how I'm supposed to feel
# But, girl, I don't think I can hide it
# Cos I get butterflies when you walk in the room
# When you walk in the room
# Cos you're the Bonnie to my Clyde, yeah
# I always thought about you Never put you to the side
# I just want you Ooh, yeah
# Cos, baby, I ain't good at lying
# I can't hold it in no more
# I got to show you how I really feel
# I can't let you walk out that door
# Cos I...
# ..been thinking about you
# Can't get you off my mind
# And you know it's true
# I don't want to put a downer on a good time
# But I can't think about you not being all mine
# So will you
# Will you
# Come and talk so we can be like we were before?
# This is all I think about, I cannot ignore
# Something so true
# I want to be waking up with you
# Ooh-ah, ooh-ah
# I want to be waking up with you
# Ooh-ah, ooh-ah
# I want to be waking up with you. #
APPLAUSE