1 00:00:06,089 --> 00:00:08,842 NETFLIX 原創影集 2 00:00:26,943 --> 00:00:29,029 {\an8}(總統:我要派人幫你收拾爛攤子) 3 00:00:31,906 --> 00:00:35,035 總統還在生印度事件的氣 4 00:00:35,118 --> 00:00:38,913 為了懲罰我們 他要我們和私人企業合作 5 00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:43,668 他特別指明要我們 用這位科技新貴的新燃料 6 00:00:43,752 --> 00:00:45,295 來發射月球衛星 7 00:00:45,503 --> 00:00:46,421 不會是她吧 8 00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:48,214 {\an8}(《科學人》) 9 00:00:48,298 --> 00:00:49,966 {\an8}艾德森詹姆斯?你在開玩笑嗎? 10 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:53,553 沒有,她幾分鐘後就會來勘察基地 11 00:00:53,928 --> 00:00:56,681 來確認我們配得上她的產品 12 00:00:56,765 --> 00:00:57,724 我讀過相關文章 13 00:00:57,807 --> 00:01:02,020 這只會有一般燃料的一半重量 而且沒有汙染物質 14 00:01:02,103 --> 00:01:03,730 這會大大改變局面 15 00:01:04,147 --> 00:01:07,358 我好厭煩大家都在奉承這些科技新貴 16 00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:09,194 政府已經很創新了 17 00:01:09,277 --> 00:01:12,155 你是否知道美國郵政署 18 00:01:12,238 --> 00:01:14,324 每年聖誕節都會發行新的聖誕郵票 19 00:01:14,407 --> 00:01:16,409 而且已經持續這麼做兩百年了? 20 00:01:16,826 --> 00:01:19,496 馬克,我不認為郵政署還存在 21 00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:22,540 - 我認為他們還存在 - 不對 22 00:01:22,624 --> 00:01:25,043 你以為我們的資金是從哪來的? 23 00:01:33,885 --> 00:01:34,928 她遲到了 24 00:01:35,011 --> 00:01:36,471 她太有錢不可能遲到 25 00:01:36,554 --> 00:01:38,181 有錢人都很不成熟 26 00:01:44,312 --> 00:01:45,313 她到了 27 00:01:46,648 --> 00:01:49,275 牛仔褲配十萬元鑽石 28 00:01:49,359 --> 00:01:50,401 真是絕配 29 00:01:50,485 --> 00:01:51,986 真是亂配 30 00:01:52,070 --> 00:01:55,657 我不知道她是要去灰姑娘舞會 還是烤豬大會 31 00:01:56,366 --> 00:01:58,284 媽的,我他媽的 32 00:01:58,368 --> 00:02:00,161 你咬到自己嘴巴嗎?我也咬過 33 00:02:00,245 --> 00:02:01,079 不是 34 00:02:01,329 --> 00:02:02,372 那個人是漢娜霍華 35 00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,415 我們一起在公關界崛起 36 00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:07,669 她只靠一己之力 就害我被美國服飾解雇 37 00:02:07,752 --> 00:02:09,963 手段是流出我傳的訊息 38 00:02:10,505 --> 00:02:13,842 她是我這輩子所認識最糟糕的人 39 00:02:14,425 --> 00:02:15,260 漢娜 40 00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:16,845 我的天啊,我下去找妳 41 00:02:16,928 --> 00:02:18,304 妳好漂亮 42 00:02:18,388 --> 00:02:19,389 詹姆斯小姐? 43 00:02:22,684 --> 00:02:23,643 他來了 44 00:02:24,686 --> 00:02:25,520 幸會 45 00:02:25,603 --> 00:02:27,438 - 奈德將軍 - 歡迎來到太空… 46 00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:30,608 可以發上推特嗎? 47 00:02:31,359 --> 00:02:33,069 - 好,用平常的那些修圖 - 沒問題 48 00:02:34,237 --> 00:02:36,197 接到總統來電,聽到他要我幫你們時 49 00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:37,198 我感到十分興奮 50 00:02:37,615 --> 00:02:40,535 我也很興奮,還很亢奮 51 00:02:40,952 --> 00:02:42,537 不只是為了可以報效國家 52 00:02:42,620 --> 00:02:45,290 同時我的火箭燃料也需要顧客 53 00:02:45,373 --> 00:02:48,209 我聽起來如果像是 背負什麼使命的話還請見諒 54 00:02:48,918 --> 00:02:50,086 但我就是 55 00:02:50,962 --> 00:02:54,924 我的燃料能讓你的火箭推進時更乾淨 56 00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:56,801 幹得好 57 00:02:57,552 --> 00:02:58,636 這邊請 58 00:03:00,263 --> 00:03:02,140 妳交到新朋友沒? 59 00:03:02,223 --> 00:03:03,266 還沒,爺爺 60 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:05,310 我在華府還有老朋友 61 00:03:05,393 --> 00:03:06,311 才沒有 62 00:03:06,811 --> 00:03:08,771 妳這年紀的人都放下得很快 63 00:03:09,439 --> 00:03:12,525 我連一個高中朋友的名字都不記得了 64 00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:14,569 可能有一個叫艾爾的 65 00:03:15,153 --> 00:03:16,863 當時有很多人叫艾爾 66 00:03:17,363 --> 00:03:19,574 不過大多都在戰爭陣亡了 67 00:03:20,283 --> 00:03:22,118 所以現在才沒人叫艾爾了 68 00:03:22,869 --> 00:03:23,703 好喔 69 00:03:24,287 --> 00:03:25,538 換妳媽聽電話 70 00:03:26,372 --> 00:03:28,833 我手機電力只剩1%,而且我媽在坐牢 71 00:03:28,917 --> 00:03:29,959 我的天啊 72 00:03:30,293 --> 00:03:32,337 親愛的,手機的電一定要隨時充… 73 00:03:35,298 --> 00:03:36,132 還真是太棒了 74 00:03:56,778 --> 00:03:59,072 (五光年後回來,謝謝您) 75 00:04:02,742 --> 00:04:03,701 真讚 76 00:04:04,452 --> 00:04:05,370 非常… 77 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:07,372 非常… 78 00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:09,749 讚 79 00:04:30,895 --> 00:04:31,729 真豪華 80 00:04:32,355 --> 00:04:34,274 請出示駕照、行照,小姐 81 00:04:35,441 --> 00:04:36,693 有沒有搞錯 82 00:04:36,776 --> 00:04:38,444 鄧肯,你嚇死我了 83 00:04:38,528 --> 00:04:39,821 對不起 84 00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:42,198 - 要我拿破布或紙巾來嗎? - 糟糕 85 00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,409 - 我媽不喜歡浪費紙巾,不過… - 慘了 86 00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:46,703 …科羅拉多州沒賣破布… 87 00:04:46,786 --> 00:04:48,121 快跑… 88 00:04:48,204 --> 00:04:49,914 走… 89 00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:55,169 這是我最近研發的藥物樣本 90 00:04:55,253 --> 00:04:58,464 是針對太空中耐甲氧西林的病原體 91 00:04:58,548 --> 00:05:01,926 這東西花了六個月 還超支預算買一堆老鼠 92 00:05:02,885 --> 00:05:04,721 在我們艾德森詹姆斯的生技部門 93 00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:07,682 只要花一半時間與四分之一的老鼠 94 00:05:08,099 --> 00:05:11,185 我一向都認為花太多錢在老鼠上面了 95 00:05:11,269 --> 00:05:12,854 也沒花那麼久的時間 96 00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:16,899 我畢竟還是發明了一種藥物 97 00:05:17,233 --> 00:05:19,569 麻煩簽署這些保密協議 這是標準流程 98 00:05:19,652 --> 00:05:21,612 麻煩簽署這些保密協議,你懂的 99 00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:24,240 你知道保密協議是什麼吧? 100 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:25,575 真幽默 101 00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:27,285 我們的完全不需要動手簽 102 00:05:27,368 --> 00:05:29,537 妳出現在這就等同簽署了 103 00:05:29,620 --> 00:05:30,538 我聽都沒聽過 104 00:05:30,621 --> 00:05:31,748 妳對這裡所不知道的事 105 00:05:31,831 --> 00:05:35,001 多到可以填滿一座 妳不知道存在的地下飛彈發射井 106 00:05:35,084 --> 00:05:36,753 你的辦公室就是在那裡嗎? 107 00:05:37,378 --> 00:05:38,212 不是 108 00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:43,593 喂,聽說你對植物有一點瞭解 109 00:05:44,260 --> 00:05:46,304 我看看,我是一位太空植物學家 110 00:05:46,387 --> 00:05:50,391 擁有傳粉與乾地根系統的高級學位 111 00:05:50,475 --> 00:05:51,309 那是什麼意思? 112 00:05:51,768 --> 00:05:53,770 我對植物有一點瞭解 113 00:05:54,103 --> 00:05:55,146 不好意思,妳是誰? 114 00:05:55,229 --> 00:05:56,773 我是安潔菈阿里上尉 115 00:05:58,274 --> 00:05:59,817 我想學習太空植物學 116 00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:01,402 學著好玩 117 00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:03,738 我不是科學家教 118 00:06:04,447 --> 00:06:05,823 我付你1小時50元 119 00:06:06,532 --> 00:06:08,659 我每天正中午到一點有空 120 00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:10,036 很好,我們約在這裡 121 00:06:10,119 --> 00:06:11,704 請有條理備課,還要提早到 122 00:06:11,788 --> 00:06:14,707 我不希望花錢卻只聽到 “妳好嗎?天氣不錯”之類的廢話 123 00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:15,625 酷喔 124 00:06:15,708 --> 00:06:17,627 我還沒開始教就想辭職了 125 00:06:18,336 --> 00:06:20,004 真高興我做了這個選擇 126 00:06:20,088 --> 00:06:21,756 是啊,我也是 127 00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:26,803 真了不起 128 00:06:27,261 --> 00:06:29,305 這裡面哪個獎對你意義最重大? 129 00:06:31,140 --> 00:06:32,433 銅星勳章 130 00:06:32,850 --> 00:06:34,310 我在波士尼亞被擊墜 131 00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:36,896 靠吃蟲存活了六天 132 00:06:36,979 --> 00:06:37,814 我也吃過 133 00:06:37,897 --> 00:06:40,149 在《荒野求生秘技》某一集吃過 134 00:06:40,316 --> 00:06:41,234 非常生酮飲食 135 00:06:41,651 --> 00:06:42,527 知道了 136 00:06:44,278 --> 00:06:46,447 我用一塊海綿收集雨水 137 00:06:46,739 --> 00:06:48,324 把水裝在一個塑膠袋內 138 00:06:49,158 --> 00:06:51,160 你從哪弄來海綿和塑膠袋? 139 00:06:51,452 --> 00:06:52,662 尿袋 140 00:06:53,371 --> 00:06:55,415 飛行員都用這個來解放 141 00:06:55,957 --> 00:06:56,916 性需求的解放 142 00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:01,421 不是,是上廁所的解放 143 00:07:02,713 --> 00:07:03,840 我的天啊 144 00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:07,051 馬克奈德將軍,你知道你是什麼嗎? 145 00:07:07,135 --> 00:07:08,261 不… 146 00:07:08,344 --> 00:07:09,387 我不是變態 147 00:07:09,470 --> 00:07:12,807 我沒有先尿在海綿上 再用同一塊海綿收集雨水 148 00:07:12,890 --> 00:07:14,142 - 我沒那種癖好 - 對 149 00:07:14,225 --> 00:07:15,685 不是 150 00:07:16,227 --> 00:07:18,521 你是一名發明家 151 00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:21,274 - 好吧 - 是真的 152 00:07:21,357 --> 00:07:22,442 - 是喔 - 想想看 153 00:07:22,525 --> 00:07:23,818 那非常有馬蓋先的風格 154 00:07:24,235 --> 00:07:26,446 如果這都不算發明 我還真不知道什麼能算了 155 00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:29,282 我不會稱那個為發明 那只是我做過的一件事情而已 156 00:07:29,365 --> 00:07:31,242 我只是利用手邊的工具 157 00:07:31,659 --> 00:07:32,535 拜託 158 00:07:34,078 --> 00:07:35,580 我偶爾是會有點靈感 159 00:07:35,663 --> 00:07:39,333 - 我早就感覺到了 - 我不像妳是個科技專家 160 00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:41,085 但我也會想出一點東西 161 00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:43,588 - 告訴我… - 不要,那些東西都很蠢 162 00:07:44,547 --> 00:07:45,465 我想聽 163 00:07:46,799 --> 00:07:47,675 好吧 164 00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:51,512 妳知道全世界的人都會握手吧? 165 00:07:51,929 --> 00:07:53,264 那是全球共通的 166 00:07:53,347 --> 00:07:56,684 那是尊敬、體面的象徵 167 00:07:57,435 --> 00:07:59,562 對,就是個普通人的握手 168 00:07:59,645 --> 00:08:02,023 沒錯,想像一下有個裝置 169 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:05,818 像是配有可動式手臂的假人 170 00:08:06,235 --> 00:08:09,614 在時代廣場還有天安門廣場各放一尊 171 00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:11,991 用科技連結起來 172 00:08:12,074 --> 00:08:13,784 上面裝有視訊螢幕 173 00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:16,454 妳就能和身在中國的人握手了 174 00:08:20,791 --> 00:08:22,668 太高明了 175 00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:25,087 讓陌生人相聚友好 176 00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:26,714 正是如此 177 00:08:26,964 --> 00:08:29,175 - 這正是我一直以來所推崇的 - 我很喜歡 178 00:08:29,258 --> 00:08:31,052 全球握透透 179 00:08:31,552 --> 00:08:32,929 要叫這個名字? 180 00:08:33,679 --> 00:08:34,639 對 181 00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:35,890 很好聽 182 00:08:36,390 --> 00:08:39,477 在握手亭內會有一名服務生 183 00:08:39,560 --> 00:08:42,855 負責防止被拿來做猥褻事情 184 00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:45,358 無須給服務生小費 185 00:08:45,441 --> 00:08:47,568 因為已經包含在入場費內 186 00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:49,403 - 都已經付過了 - 好 187 00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:52,532 - 說給別人聽的時候很蠢,不過… - 不會 188 00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:53,533 才不會 189 00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:55,952 馬克,這是你的遠見 190 00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:57,328 我不想要你因此覺得丟臉 191 00:08:57,745 --> 00:08:58,829 你相信這個想法 192 00:08:59,622 --> 00:09:01,290 你將會改變世界 193 00:09:02,833 --> 00:09:03,793 這個嘛… 194 00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:11,342 好,我們要套好口供 195 00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:14,178 打翻霜淇淋的 196 00:09:14,262 --> 00:09:17,974 是一個穿著 《威利在哪裡》T恤的有錢白人 197 00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:21,143 你看,這樣很鉅細靡遺,大家會相信 198 00:09:21,727 --> 00:09:23,563 不好說,我就想像不出來 199 00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:26,107 你無法想像大家會相信? 200 00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:28,150 不是,我無法想像妳描述的畫面 201 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,694 我沒有這種能力 202 00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:32,530 好吧 203 00:09:32,863 --> 00:09:33,823 閉上眼睛 204 00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:37,326 麥當勞叔叔踩著衝浪板 205 00:09:38,286 --> 00:09:39,203 你看到什麼? 206 00:09:39,829 --> 00:09:42,540 什麼都沒看到,就像盯著空白頁面 207 00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:44,625 我的天啊 208 00:09:45,376 --> 00:09:47,837 你沒有想像力,這也… 209 00:09:48,546 --> 00:09:49,755 這也太可愛了 210 00:09:50,881 --> 00:09:52,758 真的有這種症狀 211 00:09:52,842 --> 00:09:54,176 叫做“心盲症” 212 00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:56,512 真會說服你自己 213 00:09:56,846 --> 00:09:58,848 那你的強項是什麼? 214 00:09:58,931 --> 00:10:00,766 這就是我的強項之一 215 00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:02,602 我能盯著穀片的盒子看 216 00:10:02,685 --> 00:10:04,478 對我來說就像在看HBO一樣 217 00:10:07,481 --> 00:10:11,861 我迫不及待要和妳討論 燃料的細節內容了 218 00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:13,362 真正的化學部分 219 00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:14,864 請有耐心,馬洛里博士 220 00:10:14,947 --> 00:10:16,949 我會回答你所有的問題 221 00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:20,661 其實呢,可以邀你來一起烤肉嗎? 222 00:10:24,540 --> 00:10:26,417 (艾德森詹姆斯公司 低脂燃料) 223 00:10:27,001 --> 00:10:28,502 - 你的手機 - 不用了,謝謝 224 00:10:29,003 --> 00:10:30,254 手機要放在保護套內 225 00:10:30,338 --> 00:10:32,298 等展示結束,保護套才會再次打開 226 00:10:32,381 --> 00:10:33,799 保密協議有規定不能用手機 227 00:10:33,883 --> 00:10:35,176 我不打算照做 228 00:10:35,259 --> 00:10:37,637 因為上次我把手機交給妳後 229 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:40,931 我就被禁止出現在 自己辦公室方圓90公尺內 230 00:10:41,015 --> 00:10:42,266 你還在記仇嗎? 231 00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:43,684 別這麼小心眼,安東尼 232 00:10:43,768 --> 00:10:45,895 “別這麼小心眼,安東尼” 妳這個醜八怪 233 00:10:47,688 --> 00:10:49,607 - 啥?這是幹嘛? - 你的腳踝 234 00:10:50,066 --> 00:10:51,776 - 腳踝上的手機套… - 這真的… 235 00:10:51,859 --> 00:10:53,569 - 你親手縫製的 - 真的太蠢了 236 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:55,321 - 你真可悲,拜託一下 - 蠢透了 237 00:10:55,946 --> 00:10:57,239 好幾世紀以來 238 00:10:57,323 --> 00:11:00,534 化學家仰望著眾星提出一個疑問 239 00:11:01,577 --> 00:11:05,623 有可能創造出 利用自體廢氣的燃料嗎? 240 00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:08,125 那些化學家都是男人 241 00:11:08,542 --> 00:11:10,044 而答案是:不行 242 00:11:10,711 --> 00:11:11,879 然後我出現了 243 00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:13,881 各位女士、先生 244 00:11:13,964 --> 00:11:15,925 為各位介紹低脂燃料 245 00:11:16,759 --> 00:11:18,552 這是一種玫瑰色的火箭燃料 246 00:11:18,636 --> 00:11:23,891 比史上任何燃料 更為便宜、輕盈與乾淨 247 00:11:24,433 --> 00:11:27,144 我不自禁感到欽佩萬分 248 00:11:27,561 --> 00:11:30,481 - 謝謝 - 只是航太總署的太空化學家 249 00:11:30,564 --> 00:11:35,611 多年來一直致力於 調配出有相同最終結果的溶液 250 00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:39,240 所以我要請問分子結構為何? 251 00:11:39,323 --> 00:11:41,283 還有妳是怎麼推導出來的? 252 00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:42,535 問得非常好,謝謝你 253 00:11:43,327 --> 00:11:46,831 艾德森詹姆斯是一家上市公司 254 00:11:46,914 --> 00:11:50,876 透露我們的專利資訊 會對股東們不公平 255 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:51,919 不過… 256 00:11:52,628 --> 00:11:54,422 我可以展示給你們看 257 00:11:58,342 --> 00:11:59,218 這瓶 258 00:11:59,927 --> 00:12:01,846 是市售品牌的打火機油 259 00:12:05,141 --> 00:12:05,975 這瓶 260 00:12:07,601 --> 00:12:08,728 是脫脂燃料 261 00:12:14,859 --> 00:12:15,693 謝謝 262 00:12:18,237 --> 00:12:22,491 她為什麼不把化學特性開誠布公? 263 00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,201 這一點非常可疑 264 00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:25,870 你不是心生嫉妒吧? 265 00:12:25,953 --> 00:12:28,998 因為她解答了男科學家無解的問題? 266 00:12:29,081 --> 00:12:30,708 不好意思,馬克 267 00:12:30,791 --> 00:12:34,670 我可是辛辛那提女性理工協會的董事 268 00:12:35,087 --> 00:12:36,797 我質疑的是科學問題 269 00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:39,341 我覺得她已經用報告回答問題了 270 00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:41,010 沒有,她什麼都沒告訴我們 271 00:12:41,093 --> 00:12:42,803 她甚至不需讓這些燃料真的能用 272 00:12:42,887 --> 00:12:48,267 只要火箭用上她的燃料 她就能藉此募資 273 00:12:48,350 --> 00:12:51,228 如果出差錯,她也能把錯推給我們 274 00:12:51,312 --> 00:12:52,271 我就知道 275 00:12:52,354 --> 00:12:54,690 只要一有人認為我聰明 276 00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,233 你就會認定他們很蠢 277 00:12:57,234 --> 00:12:59,487 你們在這裡究竟討論了什麼? 278 00:12:59,904 --> 00:13:03,115 沒…我們在交換想法 我提出了一些我的想法 279 00:13:03,199 --> 00:13:05,910 像是六天工作制? 280 00:13:05,993 --> 00:13:08,412 梨葡混種? 281 00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:16,086 你有和她討論你的握手機器嗎? 282 00:13:16,170 --> 00:13:17,546 我向你保證過 283 00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:21,884 大家只會用來打手槍而已 284 00:13:21,967 --> 00:13:26,013 我聽過你的回饋意見後 加了一名服務生,艾德安 285 00:13:27,765 --> 00:13:30,017 聽著,這裡管事的人是我 286 00:13:30,100 --> 00:13:32,228 我們要用脫脂燃料,就這麼定案 287 00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:33,479 該死 288 00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:35,564 - 艾德安,等一下 - 幹嘛? 289 00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:38,359 我們等等還要去 沃爾瑪賣場挑領帶嗎? 290 00:13:38,442 --> 00:13:40,653 我下週就要去配偶探監了 291 00:13:40,903 --> 00:13:43,072 不了,你很有想法,自己去就好 292 00:13:43,781 --> 00:13:46,951 而且反正那裡有超棒的時尚顧問 293 00:13:47,034 --> 00:13:49,203 就是穿著紅背心的那些人 294 00:13:49,286 --> 00:13:50,204 你這個爛人 295 00:13:54,041 --> 00:13:55,042 希望我沒打擾到你們 296 00:13:55,125 --> 00:13:57,753 沒有,我只是在和同事激烈討論 297 00:13:58,170 --> 00:14:00,381 我是對時尚有一點瞭解 298 00:14:00,464 --> 00:14:01,549 如果你需要建議的話 299 00:14:04,468 --> 00:14:06,095 老兄,你遲到了 300 00:14:06,512 --> 00:14:07,346 我有傳訊通知妳 301 00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:09,265 我這次鐘點費要打折 302 00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:11,851 天啊,以抱著玩樂態度 學習植物學的人而言 303 00:14:11,934 --> 00:14:13,978 妳還真是認真看待 304 00:14:14,395 --> 00:14:17,106 好啦,其實是為了太空人能力測驗 305 00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:18,941 我想當太空人 306 00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:20,901 妳想當太空人? 307 00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:22,736 怎樣?你以為我開不了太空船嗎? 308 00:14:22,820 --> 00:14:24,822 我又沒這麼說,要開儘管去開 309 00:14:24,905 --> 00:14:27,283 我相信妳在太空一定很能讓人平靜 310 00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:32,496 其他人一定會很喜歡在真空的太空中 和妳一起困在小小的太空艙裡 311 00:14:33,163 --> 00:14:34,915 你…拜託可以開始學植物了嗎? 312 00:14:39,503 --> 00:14:41,922 這是我的新時尚網站:“襯彡” 313 00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:43,173 (襯彡) 314 00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:44,258 上面有個錯字 315 00:14:44,341 --> 00:14:46,343 妳最好在網站運作前先把錯字改掉 316 00:14:47,094 --> 00:14:48,345 這是團隊努力的成果 317 00:14:48,429 --> 00:14:50,598 所以衫要扣掉“衣”人之力 318 00:14:52,349 --> 00:14:53,183 瞭解 319 00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:55,436 你回答問卷的六個問題了嗎? 320 00:14:55,519 --> 00:14:56,979 - 答了 - 好 321 00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:59,064 我們來看看演算法認為你該怎麼穿 322 00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:01,066 還演算法,這真是太扯了 323 00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:08,365 好吧,這個嘛… 324 00:15:10,993 --> 00:15:12,119 我從來… 325 00:15:12,494 --> 00:15:15,164 沒穿過任何故意展現腳踝的服裝 326 00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:16,373 難道你不喜歡嗎? 327 00:15:16,457 --> 00:15:18,042 其實我不太喜歡 328 00:15:18,125 --> 00:15:19,919 - 看起來有點傻乎乎的 - 傻乎乎? 329 00:15:20,002 --> 00:15:21,211 這樣子不適合我 330 00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:24,089 馬克,你要相信自己 331 00:15:24,548 --> 00:15:26,634 你的腳踝很美 332 00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:29,261 你看起來很帥氣 333 00:15:29,803 --> 00:15:32,681 你太太一定會愛死你這樣穿 334 00:15:33,432 --> 00:15:34,433 真的嗎? 335 00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:38,103 好吧 336 00:15:38,187 --> 00:15:39,146 妳知道嗎? 337 00:15:39,563 --> 00:15:41,565 妳雖然是大名人的公關 338 00:15:41,649 --> 00:15:45,402 我可是人類探索遠大目標任務的公關 339 00:15:45,486 --> 00:15:47,988 超越這世界的目標 340 00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:51,700 去妳的,我好嫉妒… 他們到底在裡面幹什麼? 341 00:15:52,618 --> 00:15:53,911 是一項新創事業 342 00:15:54,328 --> 00:15:55,663 菜色搭配網站混合購衣網站 343 00:15:55,746 --> 00:15:59,083 無論你的屁股看起來多胖 演算法都會說它很滿意你的褲子 344 00:15:59,166 --> 00:16:01,669 她一邊搞這個,一邊弄出火箭燃料? 345 00:16:02,086 --> 00:16:05,589 是啊,低脂燃料 只是她進行的上百計劃其中一項 346 00:16:05,673 --> 00:16:07,675 因為只要有一項成功 就沒人記得失敗項目 347 00:16:08,884 --> 00:16:11,053 妳說“只要有”一項成功是什麼意思? 348 00:16:11,929 --> 00:16:12,972 我是說“等到有” 349 00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:15,808 漢娜,這個火箭燃料能用嗎? 350 00:16:16,725 --> 00:16:17,559 能啊 351 00:16:19,353 --> 00:16:20,187 漢娜 352 00:16:24,358 --> 00:16:26,485 植物學的學問其實還挺一目瞭然的 353 00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:29,196 “葉綠體與硬膜氣孔” 354 00:16:29,279 --> 00:16:31,323 是啊,這些詞還真是一看就知道意思 355 00:16:31,407 --> 00:16:32,282 我就說吧 356 00:16:33,701 --> 00:16:34,910 妳不懂拉丁文嗎? 357 00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:37,997 好吧,把我當什麼都不懂的小朋友教 358 00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:39,456 不過也別把我當笨蛋 359 00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:42,501 好吧,這恐怕會有一點挑戰性 360 00:16:42,584 --> 00:16:43,794 還有可以加快腳步嗎? 361 00:16:43,877 --> 00:16:47,047 因為都過去20分鐘了 我卻什麼都沒學到 362 00:16:47,131 --> 00:16:48,340 好,妳先冷靜下來 363 00:16:48,424 --> 00:16:51,135 要做就要照我的方式做,知道嗎? 364 00:16:51,218 --> 00:16:52,803 我先去拿點東西吃 365 00:16:52,886 --> 00:16:55,806 好啊,我們先放鬆吃個東西 366 00:16:55,889 --> 00:16:57,683 乾脆點個餐 觀賞《歡樂一家親》吧 367 00:16:57,766 --> 00:16:59,893 我還有事要做,老兄,你有看到嗎? 368 00:17:00,227 --> 00:17:01,437 知道啦,“老兄” 369 00:17:01,520 --> 00:17:04,231 我們這輩子才第二次聊天就這麼愉快 370 00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:06,400 好啦 371 00:17:06,483 --> 00:17:07,609 等一下,抱歉 372 00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:08,527 我只是… 373 00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:15,868 天啊,超過八歲以後 還說自己想當太空人的感覺還真蠢 374 00:17:16,910 --> 00:17:19,163 我真的很需要被你認真看待 375 00:17:20,164 --> 00:17:21,665 我的確是很認真看待妳 376 00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:25,252 或許沒有妳對自己那麼認真 377 00:17:25,335 --> 00:17:27,129 不過妳的認真度已經破表了 378 00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:28,714 是啊 379 00:17:30,758 --> 00:17:32,843 你要去買點心的話,幫我點火箭派 380 00:17:32,926 --> 00:17:34,553 花生醬或香蕉口味都行 381 00:17:34,970 --> 00:17:36,138 要是兩種都有呢? 382 00:17:36,972 --> 00:17:37,973 好問題 383 00:17:38,432 --> 00:17:39,600 花生… 384 00:17:39,683 --> 00:17:41,393 香蕉… 385 00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:44,271 醬花生香蕉 386 00:17:44,354 --> 00:17:46,482 算了,椰子或萊姆口味 387 00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:49,359 妳要是死在太空 388 00:17:49,443 --> 00:17:51,445 一定是被別人殺死的 389 00:17:55,324 --> 00:17:56,241 妳期待嗎? 390 00:17:56,325 --> 00:17:57,242 當然 391 00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:00,579 不過你的感覺呢,馬克?你期待嗎? 392 00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:01,747 期待這次發射? 393 00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:03,707 你一定會非常喜歡 394 00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:05,626 是嗎? 395 00:18:07,544 --> 00:18:08,879 - 是我 - 我的天啊 396 00:18:08,962 --> 00:18:10,422 - 他在做什麼? - 可以談談嗎? 397 00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:13,217 還是別燒掉我的媒體主任好了 我馬上回來 398 00:18:16,637 --> 00:18:20,432 將軍,我從來就不會去管 別人是在說實話還是說謊 399 00:18:20,516 --> 00:18:22,935 這些言詞對我幾乎沒有意義 400 00:18:23,018 --> 00:18:26,396 不過有句艾德森員工說的話 讓我非常擔憂 401 00:18:26,855 --> 00:18:27,689 什麼話? 402 00:18:28,732 --> 00:18:29,566 “能啊” 403 00:18:31,151 --> 00:18:34,196 抱歉,應該跟她說話樣子比較有關 我問:“火箭燃料能用嗎?” 404 00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:36,615 然後她說:“能啊” 405 00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:40,702 我學得太爛了,她是這麼說的… 406 00:18:41,703 --> 00:18:42,663 “能啊” 407 00:18:42,746 --> 00:18:45,040 媽的,她說:“能啊” 408 00:18:46,333 --> 00:18:47,167 算了,不重要 409 00:18:47,251 --> 00:18:50,879 身為公關人士,我絕不透露消息來源 410 00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:52,047 不過是漢娜說的 411 00:18:57,886 --> 00:18:59,304 馬洛里博士,跟我過來 412 00:18:59,388 --> 00:19:01,098 東尼,你表現得很好 413 00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:07,187 去你媽的美國服飾 414 00:19:07,729 --> 00:19:08,939 這是怎麼回事 415 00:19:09,022 --> 00:19:10,858 這是簡單的科學方程式 416 00:19:10,941 --> 00:19:14,444 要是有人屁到被東尼說屁 417 00:19:14,528 --> 00:19:16,113 那他就是屁的二次方 418 00:19:16,196 --> 00:19:19,658 我是不會稱這個為科學方程式 419 00:19:19,741 --> 00:19:21,160 不過罷了 420 00:19:23,579 --> 00:19:24,955 我們第一次共犯的罪行 421 00:19:26,290 --> 00:19:27,791 希望還有更多下一次 422 00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:33,630 話說… 423 00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:38,677 妳最近都在讀什麼? 424 00:19:39,553 --> 00:19:40,470 你說什麼? 425 00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:41,930 沒什麼 426 00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:46,226 只是丹佛機場真的很扯吧? 427 00:19:47,269 --> 00:19:50,606 鄧肯,你是刻意讀了點東西 想要讓我欣賞嗎? 428 00:19:50,689 --> 00:19:52,191 才不是… 429 00:19:52,608 --> 00:19:55,027 但如果是的話,妳會欣賞我嗎? 430 00:19:55,944 --> 00:19:57,321 我非常… 431 00:19:58,155 --> 00:19:59,198 有可能會 432 00:20:01,408 --> 00:20:02,826 所以說… 433 00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:05,329 那個… 434 00:20:05,829 --> 00:20:07,122 丹佛機場 435 00:20:08,665 --> 00:20:11,251 我讀到它的花費超過預算20億 436 00:20:12,085 --> 00:20:13,212 我完全不知道 437 00:20:13,295 --> 00:20:14,129 是啊 438 00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:15,672 很多人相信這些錢 439 00:20:15,756 --> 00:20:18,675 是用在打造地下會議室 440 00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:21,136 給那些控制世界經濟的人使用 441 00:20:21,845 --> 00:20:23,347 也就是光明會 442 00:20:24,598 --> 00:20:25,599 等一下 443 00:20:26,308 --> 00:20:27,976 你讀了什麼? 444 00:20:28,518 --> 00:20:29,478 網站 445 00:20:35,901 --> 00:20:37,569 妳知道英國女王… 446 00:20:37,653 --> 00:20:41,198 英國女王是世界上最大的毒販嗎? 447 00:20:41,615 --> 00:20:42,658 我是說真的 448 00:20:42,741 --> 00:20:45,827 而且她赤手空拳殺了傑佛瑞艾普斯汀 449 00:20:45,994 --> 00:20:48,914 她有一根指甲留得非常長 450 00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:50,749 然後在前端塗毒藥 451 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:53,126 天啊 452 00:20:56,922 --> 00:20:59,925 十、九、八 453 00:21:00,008 --> 00:21:02,844 七、六、五 454 00:21:03,512 --> 00:21:05,389 四、三 455 00:21:05,847 --> 00:21:07,182 二、一 456 00:21:10,227 --> 00:21:11,895 好,到目前為止還不錯 457 00:21:12,479 --> 00:21:13,355 祈求好運吧 458 00:21:13,855 --> 00:21:16,817 別擔心,我調整過燃料比例了 459 00:21:16,900 --> 00:21:17,901 私下調整的 460 00:21:18,777 --> 00:21:20,237 希望妳不介意 461 00:21:21,571 --> 00:21:24,741 你最後用了多少低脂燃料? 462 00:21:26,243 --> 00:21:27,077 零 463 00:21:27,661 --> 00:21:28,787 謝天謝地 464 00:21:30,497 --> 00:21:33,709 完全沒留下紀錄嗎? 465 00:21:33,792 --> 00:21:34,960 百分之百 466 00:21:35,711 --> 00:21:37,379 推進器分離完成 467 00:21:42,801 --> 00:21:45,178 要是有什麼我能效勞的地方… 468 00:21:47,306 --> 00:21:49,016 其實呢,妳可以打電話給總統 469 00:21:49,099 --> 00:21:51,184 告訴他我們進展得很順利 470 00:21:51,268 --> 00:21:54,646 不需要來自私部門的外界幫助 471 00:21:56,189 --> 00:21:57,649 - 差不多這樣 - 沒問題 472 00:21:57,733 --> 00:21:58,692 好 473 00:22:01,611 --> 00:22:02,904 很美麗吧? 474 00:22:03,322 --> 00:22:05,157 它燒的可不是市售打火機油 475 00:22:06,616 --> 00:22:07,451 好啦 476 00:22:07,617 --> 00:22:08,452 真幽默 477 00:22:10,495 --> 00:22:12,289 恭喜妳,詹姆斯小姐 478 00:22:12,372 --> 00:22:17,294 妳的燃料今天表現出 成功發射火箭的樣子 479 00:22:17,377 --> 00:22:18,295 謝謝你 480 00:22:19,046 --> 00:22:22,049 我沒有別的用意 不過你需要用點漱口水了 481 00:22:23,216 --> 00:22:28,680 說不定妳應該把精力 重新導向到研究口氣清新產品上 482 00:22:28,764 --> 00:22:31,308 那對妳來說應該比較可行 483 00:22:33,393 --> 00:22:35,687 你有一天要是位高權重了就來找我 484 00:22:35,771 --> 00:22:37,731 我說不定會有超低階的職位給你 485 00:22:37,814 --> 00:22:39,608 或是哪天妳也許權位夠高了 486 00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:40,525 我就認真看待妳 487 00:22:40,609 --> 00:22:42,027 說不定我們倆都會位高權重 488 00:22:42,110 --> 00:22:43,070 說不定喔 489 00:22:54,373 --> 00:22:55,207 靠 490 00:22:56,458 --> 00:22:57,542 好了,多保… 491 00:23:02,589 --> 00:23:04,508 我的車怎麼有嬰兒嘔吐物的味道? 492 00:23:13,100 --> 00:23:13,975 那麼… 493 00:23:14,726 --> 00:23:16,061 你認為… 494 00:23:17,562 --> 00:23:18,563 這條如何? 495 00:23:19,523 --> 00:23:20,482 這條是咖啡色的 496 00:23:20,565 --> 00:23:21,983 咖啡色跟什麼都不搭 497 00:23:22,067 --> 00:23:25,404 我確定一定有東西能跟咖啡色搭配 498 00:23:28,073 --> 00:23:29,491 幸好我還有你 499 00:23:31,159 --> 00:23:33,078 這句話說得還真動聽 500 00:23:33,954 --> 00:23:36,081 - 我喜歡那條 - 這條?很漂亮 501 00:23:36,164 --> 00:23:39,626 (三天後) 502 00:23:40,085 --> 00:23:40,961 什麼事? 503 00:23:41,503 --> 00:23:45,757 探勘衛星已進入繞行月球的軌道 504 00:23:45,841 --> 00:23:48,301 很好,鏡頭開始傳輸影像了嗎? 505 00:23:48,385 --> 00:23:51,138 是,長官,我們有首批影像 506 00:23:51,221 --> 00:23:52,514 非常好 507 00:23:52,722 --> 00:23:55,058 太棒了 508 00:23:56,810 --> 00:23:58,353 這張拍得非常漂亮 509 00:23:58,437 --> 00:24:01,064 你可能快速翻閱會比較好一點 510 00:24:03,024 --> 00:24:03,942 那是什麼? 511 00:24:06,236 --> 00:24:08,822 我們還不能百分之百確定那是什麼 512 00:24:12,701 --> 00:24:14,161 這是中國國旗 513 00:24:14,244 --> 00:24:15,662 啥? 514 00:24:16,788 --> 00:24:17,747 啥? 515 00:24:18,165 --> 00:24:19,583 你是說… 516 00:24:19,791 --> 00:24:21,460 天啊,真是厲害 517 00:24:22,043 --> 00:24:24,379 我完全不知道他們那麼有進展 518 00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:25,881 真了不起 519 00:24:27,257 --> 00:24:28,592 他們真厲害 520 00:24:28,675 --> 00:24:30,969 實在是太棒了 521 00:24:31,052 --> 00:24:31,970 我不得不… 522 00:24:34,890 --> 00:24:36,725 真為他們開心 523 00:24:37,225 --> 00:24:38,810 他們真的上去了 524 00:24:38,894 --> 00:24:40,020 真厲害 525 00:24:43,106 --> 00:24:45,400 媽的 526 00:24:45,775 --> 00:24:49,196 那些臭中國佬辦到了 527 00:24:49,404 --> 00:24:50,906 他們辦到了 528 00:24:52,908 --> 00:24:54,743 這還真好笑 529 00:26:16,783 --> 00:26:17,701 字幕翻譯:韓仁耀