1
00:00:01,727 --> 00:00:04,578
- Shel and I were
backyard sweethearts,
2
00:00:04,730 --> 00:00:05,838
soul mates.
3
00:00:05,914 --> 00:00:07,898
- Gross.
See ya.
4
00:00:07,900 --> 00:00:10,417
- Sexual conquistadors.
5
00:00:10,494 --> 00:00:11,251
- I'm back.
6
00:00:11,403 --> 00:00:12,569
- But then I got lost.
7
00:00:12,738 --> 00:00:15,014
- Maybe I can help you
find your way, wink, wink.
8
00:00:15,165 --> 00:00:17,850
- The journey back has been
long and hard.
9
00:00:18,001 --> 00:00:20,835
- Speaking of, do you know
what a cloaca is?
10
00:00:20,913 --> 00:00:22,354
Would you like to see one?
11
00:00:22,431 --> 00:00:26,191
- But now, after 15 years,
I feel I'm almost home.
12
00:00:26,268 --> 00:00:28,877
- It's a seagull's pe--
wait a minute.
13
00:00:28,954 --> 00:00:32,698
It took you 15 years to get
from this yard to that yard?
14
00:00:32,891 --> 00:00:34,182
Whoo!
Good thing you're hot.
15
00:00:34,201 --> 00:00:38,019
- And I never, ever gave up,
just like I'm sure
16
00:00:38,097 --> 00:00:40,097
Shel never gave up on me.
17
00:00:40,115 --> 00:00:42,207
And now, we can finally
be together!
18
00:00:42,284 --> 00:00:45,711
- Guess who's getting
married tomorrow?
19
00:00:45,788 --> 00:00:48,438
Me!
20
00:00:48,457 --> 00:00:51,291
[upbeat music]
21
00:00:51,443 --> 00:00:54,461
[all barking musically]
22
00:00:54,613 --> 00:01:01,477
♪ ♪
23
00:01:03,289 --> 00:01:06,398
[all barking or meowing
musically]
24
00:01:06,475 --> 00:01:13,405
♪ ♪
25
00:01:21,640 --> 00:01:25,542
- Ee...
26
00:01:28,756 --> 00:01:30,130
- Oh, good.
Okay, you're done.
27
00:01:30,165 --> 00:01:32,332
And we still have a few minutes
left of the session.
28
00:01:32,484 --> 00:01:33,908
- Sorry, I just can't believe
29
00:01:33,928 --> 00:01:36,336
I'm about to marry
the shoe of my dreams,
30
00:01:36,488 --> 00:01:39,339
but I confess, my excitement
for the impending nuptials
31
00:01:39,491 --> 00:01:42,008
has turned me
into a bit of groom-zilla.
32
00:01:42,161 --> 00:01:44,937
You call this a place setting?
33
00:01:45,013 --> 00:01:47,013
Ew, tastes like garbage.
34
00:01:47,166 --> 00:01:50,016
- Sometimes those kind
of big emotions
35
00:01:50,169 --> 00:01:52,427
are our way of burying doubts
36
00:01:52,504 --> 00:01:55,263
we may have
about important life decisions.
37
00:01:55,341 --> 00:01:58,024
- Once again, Honey,
you've seen right through me.
38
00:01:58,177 --> 00:02:00,786
- Keep talking.
- I have to confess.
39
00:02:00,863 --> 00:02:02,346
I was up all night
40
00:02:02,364 --> 00:02:06,016
wondering if I'm making
a big mistake with Lindsay...
41
00:02:06,034 --> 00:02:09,611
by having our wedding color
be forest green.
42
00:02:09,630 --> 00:02:11,188
Is it too on the nose?
43
00:02:11,190 --> 00:02:14,216
- I was talking about
a bigger life decision.
44
00:02:15,285 --> 00:02:17,136
Anyone else want
to jump in here?
45
00:02:17,287 --> 00:02:18,211
- Shel, I'm sorry.
46
00:02:18,364 --> 00:02:19,880
I can't come
to your bachelor party.
47
00:02:19,956 --> 00:02:21,531
I have to stay home
and take care of the kittens.
48
00:02:21,550 --> 00:02:23,867
Their real bummer is, Kevin's
being a total deadbeat dad
49
00:02:23,886 --> 00:02:25,385
not helping to raise
these little trouble makers.
50
00:02:25,537 --> 00:02:28,147
- You think your human, Kevin,
is the father?
51
00:02:28,298 --> 00:02:29,982
- Well, I've gone over
all the possible scenarios
52
00:02:30,133 --> 00:02:31,966
of how this miracle pregnancy
could have happened.
53
00:02:32,044 --> 00:02:34,302
[purrs]
[yowls]
54
00:02:34,321 --> 00:02:35,562
[meows]
55
00:02:35,639 --> 00:02:36,730
[yowls]
56
00:02:36,806 --> 00:02:38,657
[purrs]
57
00:02:38,734 --> 00:02:40,066
Oh, hey, dude.
58
00:02:40,143 --> 00:02:41,401
You want to do
that thing again?
59
00:02:41,553 --> 00:02:42,661
- Growl.
60
00:02:42,738 --> 00:02:43,871
- Yeah, it's got to be Kevin.
61
00:02:43,980 --> 00:02:45,330
- I have a request.
62
00:02:45,407 --> 00:02:48,225
Honey, you've always been there
for Lindsay and me.
63
00:02:48,243 --> 00:02:52,487
So would you do us the honor
of officiating our wedding?
64
00:02:52,564 --> 00:02:53,747
- Oh, Shel.
65
00:02:53,899 --> 00:02:55,823
- I know you're not
legally licensed,
66
00:02:55,901 --> 00:02:58,919
but you're not legally licensed
to be a therapist either,
67
00:02:59,071 --> 00:03:01,162
and we've been doing
great work here.
68
00:03:01,182 --> 00:03:02,848
- Mm...
- It got me where I am today.
69
00:03:02,999 --> 00:03:05,742
- Oh, it has?
Oh, dear.
70
00:03:05,761 --> 00:03:09,671
Okay, Shel, before I can agree
to officiate,
71
00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:11,023
we'll need to set
72
00:03:11,174 --> 00:03:15,101
a premarital couple's session
for you and Lindsay.
73
00:03:15,178 --> 00:03:17,254
- Oh, we'll be having several,
74
00:03:17,256 --> 00:03:19,756
and you're more than welcome
to join.
75
00:03:19,758 --> 00:03:21,182
- I mean couple's counseling.
76
00:03:21,260 --> 00:03:22,016
- Oh.
77
00:03:22,036 --> 00:03:24,870
Well, the offer still stands.
78
00:03:24,947 --> 00:03:28,098
[bright music]
79
00:03:28,116 --> 00:03:29,691
I won't lie to you, Honey.
80
00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:31,268
We find it a little silly
81
00:03:31,286 --> 00:03:33,103
to have to jump
through this hoop.
82
00:03:33,121 --> 00:03:36,531
I obviously haven't been
this happy in, what, 15 years?
83
00:03:36,608 --> 00:03:38,050
- Since about the time
Darla left?
84
00:03:38,126 --> 00:03:40,201
- Yes, but that's history,
85
00:03:40,221 --> 00:03:42,721
and what could be healthier
than moving on?
86
00:03:42,872 --> 00:03:44,038
- Hmm, fair enough.
87
00:03:44,116 --> 00:03:46,040
Lindsay, how are you feeling
88
00:03:46,118 --> 00:03:47,375
about your relationship
right now?
89
00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:50,211
- She didn't come here
to be interrogated!
90
00:03:50,231 --> 00:03:52,231
Besides, I know
what's in her heart and I know
91
00:03:52,307 --> 00:03:55,734
I'm going to be the happiest
tortoise in the universe
92
00:03:55,885 --> 00:03:57,827
when I see her
walking down the aisle.
93
00:03:57,829 --> 00:03:58,904
- Hold on.
94
00:03:59,055 --> 00:04:01,764
You expect her
to walk down the aisle.
95
00:04:01,766 --> 00:04:03,149
- [laughs]
Of course.
96
00:04:03,226 --> 00:04:06,060
- Okay, Honey.
This is your chance.
97
00:04:06,138 --> 00:04:08,413
He'll thank you in the future.
98
00:04:08,565 --> 00:04:10,249
- And so on
this happy occasion,
99
00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,993
in front of my family
and secret family,
100
00:04:13,069 --> 00:04:15,812
I want to thank the wise
yet humble dog
101
00:04:15,831 --> 00:04:19,407
who helped me accept reality
all those years ago
102
00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:23,262
when a certain shoe bride
failed to walk down the aisle,
103
00:04:23,413 --> 00:04:27,266
my therapist and commander,
Honey.
104
00:04:27,417 --> 00:04:28,433
- Thank you, Shel.
105
00:04:28,585 --> 00:04:30,251
I just wanted you
to have real love
106
00:04:30,329 --> 00:04:32,420
with somebody
who loved you back.
107
00:04:32,498 --> 00:04:35,015
But we have an incursion
in the Delta Quadrant.
108
00:04:35,091 --> 00:04:36,758
Prepare to engage.
109
00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:39,611
[whirring]
110
00:04:39,763 --> 00:04:41,446
[exciting music]
111
00:04:41,598 --> 00:04:42,948
Move out!
112
00:04:43,099 --> 00:04:44,116
This is for all the pets
who died
113
00:04:44,267 --> 00:04:46,693
before we could live forever!
114
00:04:46,811 --> 00:04:49,771
♪ ♪
115
00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,348
Shel, Lindsay,
116
00:04:51,366 --> 00:04:53,959
I would love to facilitate
the merging of your bio force--
117
00:04:54,036 --> 00:04:56,778
I mean, to officiate
your wedding.
118
00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:57,871
- Huzzah!
119
00:04:58,023 --> 00:04:59,539
And, of course, tradition holds
120
00:04:59,691 --> 00:05:02,208
that you'll also throw
her bachelorette party.
121
00:05:02,361 --> 00:05:03,877
- I don't think that's--
- Wonderful.
122
00:05:03,953 --> 00:05:05,762
I'll just leave her here.
123
00:05:07,032 --> 00:05:08,882
- "Hello,
welcome to the wedding
124
00:05:09,034 --> 00:05:10,458
"of Shel and Lindsay,
125
00:05:10,477 --> 00:05:13,812
or as I like to call her,
the Can't Runaway Bride."
126
00:05:13,963 --> 00:05:15,205
Pause for laughs.
127
00:05:15,432 --> 00:05:17,799
Oh, wait, I shouldn't start out
with a joke that strong.
128
00:05:17,876 --> 00:05:20,635
I'll save it for when Shel's
ready to laugh about this.
129
00:05:20,712 --> 00:05:21,820
"What is love?
130
00:05:21,971 --> 00:05:24,214
Is love a verb? Is it a noun?"
- [slurping]
131
00:05:24,232 --> 00:05:26,825
Yeah, you're--
you're losing 'em, Honey.
132
00:05:26,976 --> 00:05:28,568
You want some help?
- Really?
133
00:05:28,645 --> 00:05:31,646
I'd like that, yeah.
What would you say about love?
134
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:33,832
- Love--love is a feeling.
135
00:05:33,909 --> 00:05:36,910
It's like...
[sighs contentedly]
136
00:05:37,062 --> 00:05:37,985
You know what I mean?
137
00:05:38,063 --> 00:05:39,913
- Yeah, I think I do,
138
00:05:40,007 --> 00:05:41,322
but how would you phrase that?
139
00:05:41,342 --> 00:05:42,232
- It's like...
140
00:05:42,401 --> 00:05:44,234
[groans]
Does that make sense?
141
00:05:44,236 --> 00:05:46,086
- I mean, I get it,
but I'm just not sure
142
00:05:46,162 --> 00:05:48,513
everyone else at the wedding
is going to understand.
143
00:05:48,665 --> 00:05:51,257
I mean, there's going to be
birds there, so...
144
00:05:51,334 --> 00:05:52,500
yeah, I'll figure it out.
145
00:05:52,578 --> 00:05:53,334
You go have fun.
146
00:05:53,354 --> 00:05:54,928
- Okay, cool.
Yeah, yeah.
147
00:05:55,080 --> 00:05:56,930
Tonight's bachelor party
is gonna be like--
148
00:05:57,082 --> 00:05:59,749
[burbling]
You know?
149
00:05:59,768 --> 00:06:03,103
- Oh, yeah, yeah, I mean,
the bachelorette party
150
00:06:03,179 --> 00:06:06,365
is going to be--
♪ Bow chicka wow wow bop ♪
151
00:06:06,516 --> 00:06:09,776
- Okay, well, now you're
just talking gibberish.
152
00:06:09,928 --> 00:06:12,746
[upbeat music]
153
00:06:12,897 --> 00:06:15,281
- Okay, everyone ready?
154
00:06:15,358 --> 00:06:17,784
Tonight is gonna be
full of surprises.
155
00:06:17,936 --> 00:06:20,103
- I knew you were my guy.
156
00:06:20,122 --> 00:06:22,047
- Well, I'll tell you what's
really full of surprises:
157
00:06:22,198 --> 00:06:24,958
the trash cans outside
of Nicky Cage's house.
158
00:06:25,034 --> 00:06:26,701
- Got you again, Jeffrey!
159
00:06:26,778 --> 00:06:30,055
Oh, "Moonstruck" feels like
a lifetime ago.
160
00:06:30,206 --> 00:06:34,542
- Multiple trash cans.
Must be nice.
161
00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:38,546
Okay, fellas, you ready
for some chills and thrills?
162
00:06:38,624 --> 00:06:40,457
[all scream]
- Good news, fellas.
163
00:06:40,475 --> 00:06:43,885
Kevin gave away all my kittens,
so now I'm free to hang out.
164
00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:46,463
- Dude, I'm sorry.
Are you okay?
165
00:06:46,465 --> 00:06:49,074
- Yeah, it was a lot of work.
Bachelor party!
166
00:06:49,151 --> 00:06:51,743
- Whee!
- [burbling]
167
00:06:51,895 --> 00:06:53,895
- Now, you're
probably wondering
168
00:06:53,972 --> 00:06:55,138
why we met in the woods.
169
00:06:55,157 --> 00:06:57,249
- Because you have
a sinister plan
170
00:06:57,400 --> 00:06:58,750
and don't want any witnesses?
171
00:06:58,827 --> 00:07:02,328
- What? What?
[cackles]
172
00:07:02,481 --> 00:07:03,571
No!
173
00:07:03,649 --> 00:07:05,315
We came out here to--
174
00:07:05,333 --> 00:07:06,758
fast boom-booms, Tchotchke.
175
00:07:06,835 --> 00:07:08,001
[tapping]
176
00:07:08,153 --> 00:07:10,987
Lick toad.
[all gasp]
177
00:07:10,989 --> 00:07:12,839
Gentlemen, this is Cane.
178
00:07:12,991 --> 00:07:14,841
Cane, these are the boys.
179
00:07:14,918 --> 00:07:19,587
Now, licking Cane will set us
all up for a wild night.
180
00:07:19,606 --> 00:07:21,665
- Ah, I love licking things.
181
00:07:21,667 --> 00:07:24,776
- I'm equal part terrified
and scared.
182
00:07:24,853 --> 00:07:26,427
- All right, settle down.
183
00:07:26,488 --> 00:07:29,355
First timers, listen close.
Everyone gets one lick.
184
00:07:29,432 --> 00:07:32,433
You will see and feel things
that may or may not be real.
185
00:07:32,453 --> 00:07:34,527
Now, let's get started.
I have a gender reveal
186
00:07:34,680 --> 00:07:36,179
for a couple of lizards
in about an hour.
187
00:07:36,198 --> 00:07:39,048
- All right, party boy,
you're up.
188
00:07:39,050 --> 00:07:40,517
- I'm a little nervous.
189
00:07:40,535 --> 00:07:43,253
This is my first
non-sexual licking.
190
00:07:45,707 --> 00:07:50,427
I don't feel any--blast off!
191
00:07:53,474 --> 00:07:56,549
- Blast off!
192
00:07:56,626 --> 00:07:59,552
- Enjoy your trip.
Thank you. Next?
193
00:07:59,629 --> 00:08:00,979
- Whoa.
[laughs]
194
00:08:01,056 --> 00:08:03,648
Well, that's interesting.
[laughs]
195
00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:05,391
Oh, I see.
It's dopamine.
196
00:08:05,468 --> 00:08:08,436
[funky music]
197
00:08:08,471 --> 00:08:14,217
♪ ♪
198
00:08:14,236 --> 00:08:16,995
- Whoa, so trippy.
199
00:08:17,146 --> 00:08:18,330
- You didn't lick me.
200
00:08:18,406 --> 00:08:19,572
- I don't trust that raccoon.
201
00:08:19,725 --> 00:08:21,315
He's always got
his weird little fingers
202
00:08:21,393 --> 00:08:22,501
in everybody's pies.
203
00:08:22,577 --> 00:08:24,227
Oh!
204
00:08:24,246 --> 00:08:27,714
Am I made of moonlight
and whispers?
205
00:08:28,825 --> 00:08:30,675
- Ooh, you taste familiar.
206
00:08:30,827 --> 00:08:33,720
Were you in Ibiza in 2016?
207
00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:37,832
- [chuckles]
- Hey, slow down, buddy.
208
00:08:37,909 --> 00:08:39,166
I get paid by the lick.
209
00:08:39,186 --> 00:08:41,168
- Oh, about that.
210
00:08:41,221 --> 00:08:43,930
- Okay, I'll send an invoice!
- You know what?
211
00:08:44,007 --> 00:08:45,932
Let's just put
our schemes, scams,
212
00:08:46,084 --> 00:08:48,918
and animal trafficking side
hustles on hold for the night.
213
00:08:48,937 --> 00:08:51,012
- I knew it!
Everybody heard that, right?
214
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:53,347
- Quiet, pretty baby.
Mwah.
215
00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:55,441
Because this is beautiful.
216
00:08:55,594 --> 00:08:59,162
This old freak is marrying
the love of his life tomorrow.
217
00:08:59,931 --> 00:09:02,541
Must be nice.
218
00:09:02,692 --> 00:09:04,692
- Ah!
219
00:09:04,770 --> 00:09:06,527
- Oh, Lindsay.
220
00:09:06,547 --> 00:09:10,106
[both moaning]
221
00:09:10,125 --> 00:09:11,808
- Thank you for coming
222
00:09:11,810 --> 00:09:14,460
to Lindsay's
bachelorette party!
223
00:09:14,613 --> 00:09:15,720
[laughs]
224
00:09:15,872 --> 00:09:17,947
We're just a rowdy gang
of fun-loving
225
00:09:17,966 --> 00:09:21,117
female identifying animals
and Diablo.
226
00:09:21,119 --> 00:09:22,802
- Thanks for letting me join,
guys.
227
00:09:22,954 --> 00:09:25,063
I just didn't want to wander
into the forest at night.
228
00:09:25,214 --> 00:09:28,883
- Fake party for shoe with dog
in sweater in tool shed.
229
00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:30,293
I've reached my bottom.
230
00:09:30,353 --> 00:09:33,220
- Yeah, I know it's unorthodox,
but I promised Shel.
231
00:09:33,298 --> 00:09:35,982
Besides, we don't get
a lot of chances to whoop it up
232
00:09:36,134 --> 00:09:37,576
outside of group, okay?
233
00:09:37,727 --> 00:09:39,135
So let's just get through it,
234
00:09:39,137 --> 00:09:40,912
and when Shel asks
if we had fun,
235
00:09:40,989 --> 00:09:43,473
we can say yes and mean it.
Whoo!
236
00:09:43,491 --> 00:09:45,399
- What would be fun is,
we disappear the shoe
237
00:09:45,419 --> 00:09:46,585
once and for all.
238
00:09:46,778 --> 00:09:48,920
Enough with horny tortoise
and his delusions.
239
00:09:48,997 --> 00:09:50,830
- Yeah, let's just throw her
in the trash
240
00:09:50,907 --> 00:09:52,332
and get jacked up
on this fertilizer.
241
00:09:52,408 --> 00:09:53,592
- No!
242
00:09:53,743 --> 00:09:55,835
This is not how you throw
a bachelorette party,
243
00:09:55,987 --> 00:09:57,745
but I know someone
who can help.
244
00:09:57,823 --> 00:09:58,838
- Wait, what?
245
00:09:58,915 --> 00:09:59,839
- [with Southern accent]
Howdy, y'all.
246
00:09:59,916 --> 00:10:02,008
I'm Cowgal Elsa,
247
00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:04,510
and this ain't my first rodeo.
248
00:10:04,663 --> 00:10:08,848
- I sense a new low is coming.
- Do you hear that knocking?
249
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:11,017
I think there's someone
at the door.
250
00:10:11,169 --> 00:10:13,260
- Ooh, I wonder who it is.
251
00:10:13,338 --> 00:10:16,506
- Hey, that's one of Jill's
groove restoration boots.
252
00:10:16,524 --> 00:10:20,343
- No, it's a handsome drifter's
cowboy boot.
253
00:10:20,362 --> 00:10:21,936
He just rolled into town,
254
00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:25,181
and I think he's got his eye
on you, Lindsay.
255
00:10:25,183 --> 00:10:27,292
- Okay, maybe it's time
to call it.
256
00:10:27,369 --> 00:10:28,518
- No!
No.
257
00:10:28,611 --> 00:10:31,204
This--this shindig's
just getting started.
258
00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:33,206
Bachelorette parties
are about games
259
00:10:33,358 --> 00:10:36,283
designed to put you on the spot
and succumb to peer pressure.
260
00:10:36,361 --> 00:10:39,028
So, Honey, truth or dare?
261
00:10:39,047 --> 00:10:41,306
- Uh, dare.
- Kiss the boot.
262
00:10:41,383 --> 00:10:43,549
- No, I don't want to end up
on the Internet.
263
00:10:43,702 --> 00:10:44,717
Anyone else want to try?
264
00:10:44,794 --> 00:10:45,810
- I'm allergic to suede.
265
00:10:45,887 --> 00:10:47,370
- Somebody kiss
the freaking boot!
266
00:10:47,389 --> 00:10:49,630
- Do I have to do everything?
267
00:10:49,650 --> 00:10:51,132
Fine, I'll kiss the boot.
268
00:10:51,209 --> 00:10:53,893
both: Kiss the boot!
Kiss the boot!
269
00:10:53,970 --> 00:10:55,044
Kiss the boot!
270
00:10:55,063 --> 00:10:57,547
- I just can't believe
I'm doing this.
271
00:10:57,565 --> 00:11:00,075
Hi, I'm Elsa.
272
00:11:01,644 --> 00:11:03,495
Are you ready?
273
00:11:05,223 --> 00:11:07,907
Oh, my God, you guys,
that is so unlike me.
274
00:11:08,059 --> 00:11:09,559
But it felt so right.
275
00:11:09,561 --> 00:11:12,504
Don't get any ideas.
I licked him first.
276
00:11:12,655 --> 00:11:14,339
- Okay, Honey still
owes us a dare.
277
00:11:14,416 --> 00:11:17,825
I dare you to throw Lindsay
in the outside trash can.
278
00:11:17,903 --> 00:11:18,843
- Yeah!
- What?
279
00:11:18,995 --> 00:11:19,919
- Rules are rules.
280
00:11:19,996 --> 00:11:22,004
Let's throw Lindsay away
for good.
281
00:11:23,332 --> 00:11:26,910
- Gentlemen, it's Shel's
last night as a bachelor.
282
00:11:26,928 --> 00:11:29,078
So let's make it one
to remember
283
00:11:29,139 --> 00:11:33,358
and give it up for Amberconda!
284
00:11:33,509 --> 00:11:36,769
- Ah! A cucumber?
- Relax, it's just a snake.
285
00:11:36,922 --> 00:11:38,345
Oh, my God!
It's a snake!
286
00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:41,090
- You must be the lucky guy.
287
00:11:41,109 --> 00:11:42,850
- Hello, there.
I'm Shel.
288
00:11:42,928 --> 00:11:44,852
Sheldon for long.
289
00:11:44,871 --> 00:11:48,097
- Hey, there, Shelly.
I'm Amber.
290
00:11:48,116 --> 00:11:50,542
I'm gonna take
good care of you.
291
00:11:50,693 --> 00:11:52,785
- You are?
292
00:11:52,862 --> 00:11:55,529
What are you doing?
293
00:11:55,549 --> 00:11:58,049
- Just relax.
294
00:11:58,201 --> 00:11:59,366
- What are we watching?
295
00:11:59,386 --> 00:12:01,994
- She appears to be
in the process of molting.
296
00:12:02,072 --> 00:12:03,871
- Dude, are you smart now?
297
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:05,298
- I guess that's why
I'm finding
298
00:12:05,450 --> 00:12:06,616
the objectification
299
00:12:06,785 --> 00:12:09,786
of this lady of the garden
somewhat problematic.
300
00:12:09,788 --> 00:12:11,378
- Are you having a good time?
301
00:12:11,456 --> 00:12:14,899
I mostly see heat,
not facial expressions.
302
00:12:14,976 --> 00:12:16,901
- I'm completely gobsmacked.
303
00:12:16,978 --> 00:12:19,979
Thank you, and I enjoy
the way you move
304
00:12:20,131 --> 00:12:22,632
and that you can move
305
00:12:22,634 --> 00:12:24,909
and talk and breathe.
306
00:12:25,061 --> 00:12:27,153
My fiancée does
none of those things.
307
00:12:27,305 --> 00:12:31,140
- Oh, she sounds great.
Congratulations.
308
00:12:31,142 --> 00:12:33,326
both: Push her in!
Push her in!
309
00:12:33,402 --> 00:12:35,253
- Well, this is not
what I meant when I said
310
00:12:35,404 --> 00:12:37,088
I wanted us to have fun.
- Wait!
311
00:12:37,165 --> 00:12:38,664
Well, at least we have
to make sure she's dead,
312
00:12:38,759 --> 00:12:40,984
or she could come back
and haunt us forever.
313
00:12:40,986 --> 00:12:43,669
-I say we eat her face.
- Oh, no. I can't look.
314
00:12:43,746 --> 00:12:46,506
- Maybe we just bury her now
and deal with her ghost later.
315
00:12:46,658 --> 00:12:47,991
How about that?
316
00:12:47,993 --> 00:12:50,343
- Listen, if we remove
the object of Shel's affection,
317
00:12:50,419 --> 00:12:53,938
then he could just transfer
that love to something else.
318
00:12:54,015 --> 00:12:55,999
- Who cares?
- Push her in.
319
00:12:56,001 --> 00:12:59,352
[tense music]
320
00:12:59,428 --> 00:13:03,523
♪ ♪
321
00:13:03,675 --> 00:13:05,450
- Okay, push her in.
322
00:13:05,601 --> 00:13:06,785
- [laughs]
323
00:13:06,936 --> 00:13:08,769
She's trash!
- Ha-ha.
324
00:13:08,789 --> 00:13:10,179
[all cheering]
Yay.
325
00:13:10,198 --> 00:13:12,865
Who knew fun could be
this uncomfortable?
326
00:13:13,535 --> 00:13:17,020
- Oh, look how clear the Big
Poop Scooper is tonight.
327
00:13:17,022 --> 00:13:19,022
Humans used to use the stars
328
00:13:19,024 --> 00:13:21,132
to guide their ships
across the oceans.
329
00:13:21,284 --> 00:13:23,543
Now they use them to make
ill-advised decisions
330
00:13:23,695 --> 00:13:26,029
about their careers
and relationships.
331
00:13:26,031 --> 00:13:30,308
- I want to see the stars too.
Somebody flip me.
332
00:13:30,459 --> 00:13:32,368
Wow.
333
00:13:32,370 --> 00:13:35,963
Gents, am I fooling myself
with Lindsay?
334
00:13:35,982 --> 00:13:39,075
Licking that toad
and canoodling with that snake
335
00:13:39,077 --> 00:13:40,560
has shined a light
on some things
336
00:13:40,636 --> 00:13:44,063
that perhaps I've not been
allowing myself to see.
337
00:13:44,140 --> 00:13:47,400
Maybe Lindsay
is really just a shoe.
338
00:13:47,552 --> 00:13:50,553
- Well, what if she is?
- Then she's not real.
339
00:13:50,555 --> 00:13:53,647
- What's real?
- Consequences, man.
340
00:13:53,667 --> 00:13:54,907
- [laughing]
Oh, exactly.
341
00:13:55,060 --> 00:13:58,411
- No, no, actually,
what is real?
342
00:13:58,487 --> 00:14:01,155
[trippy music]
343
00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:03,490
- Mama?
- Oh, hey, you guys.
344
00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:05,343
[kittens mewing]
345
00:14:05,494 --> 00:14:08,071
[fireworks whistle and pop]
346
00:14:08,089 --> 00:14:10,348
I hope you all found
your Kevins.
347
00:14:10,499 --> 00:14:11,850
Bye.
348
00:14:12,001 --> 00:14:13,409
Huh, closure.
349
00:14:13,428 --> 00:14:17,355
- You know what is real?
Your love for Lindsay.
350
00:14:17,506 --> 00:14:19,006
I've never seen you so happy.
351
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:22,009
- I just don't know
if it makes sense anymore.
352
00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:23,920
- It never made sense.
- Bigger!
353
00:14:23,938 --> 00:14:26,013
- [dramatically]
It never made sense!
354
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:27,198
- Honey and I don't make sense,
355
00:14:27,350 --> 00:14:30,109
but sense has
nothing to do with love.
356
00:14:30,186 --> 00:14:32,203
I mean, what holds
this universe together?
357
00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:35,281
Probably the same thing
that holds two hearts together.
358
00:14:35,433 --> 00:14:38,618
It's magical.
It's unique for everybody.
359
00:14:38,770 --> 00:14:40,694
- Yeah, and besides,
you can always get out of it.
360
00:14:40,772 --> 00:14:41,938
She's a shoe.
361
00:14:41,940 --> 00:14:43,456
- Gentlemen, I must
take my leave
362
00:14:43,532 --> 00:14:47,051
to articulate my newfound
comprehension of love to Honey.
363
00:14:47,203 --> 00:14:50,463
She's going to dig smart me.
I bid you all adieu-doo.
364
00:14:50,539 --> 00:14:51,948
[laughs]
[clears throat]
365
00:14:51,966 --> 00:14:53,558
Adieu.
[laughs]
366
00:14:53,593 --> 00:14:56,543
Uh-oh, it's fading.
367
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,087
- Thank you, my friends.
368
00:14:58,089 --> 00:15:00,973
You've given me
a lot to think about.
369
00:15:01,126 --> 00:15:04,718
- Oh, my God.
I am covered in fur.
370
00:15:04,796 --> 00:15:08,031
- [sobbing]
371
00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:14,804
You're all so vulnerable
and honest and real.
372
00:15:14,806 --> 00:15:16,063
I want to be real.
373
00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:17,749
I want to take off this mask
374
00:15:17,900 --> 00:15:20,567
and show you guys
who I really am.
375
00:15:20,645 --> 00:15:21,978
[groans]
376
00:15:21,996 --> 00:15:23,755
- Hey, hey, hey!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, easy, man.
377
00:15:23,831 --> 00:15:25,239
- Why do they make everything
so hard to open?
378
00:15:25,316 --> 00:15:27,483
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!
- Stop it.
379
00:15:27,502 --> 00:15:28,742
- I can't be here.
380
00:15:28,820 --> 00:15:31,337
- [panting]
381
00:15:31,489 --> 00:15:35,841
Love is magic, and like magic,
it's better left--ah!
382
00:15:35,994 --> 00:15:37,769
Love is--love is--
383
00:15:37,845 --> 00:15:38,844
[farts]
384
00:15:38,997 --> 00:15:41,255
[laughs]
Oh, no!
385
00:15:41,332 --> 00:15:43,608
I thought that was
kind of funny.
386
00:15:43,759 --> 00:15:44,943
Pull it together, man!
387
00:15:45,094 --> 00:15:47,070
You were briefly better
than this!
388
00:15:53,511 --> 00:15:56,862
- I hate throwing parties.
No one ever helps you clean up.
389
00:15:57,015 --> 00:15:59,699
- Ow. Ow!
- Oh, my God! Lindsay?
390
00:15:59,851 --> 00:16:02,776
- [laughs]
391
00:16:02,796 --> 00:16:04,403
- I knew it was you.
392
00:16:04,555 --> 00:16:05,612
- [panting]
393
00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:06,706
Honey, I got it!
394
00:16:06,782 --> 00:16:09,525
Love is...um...gah!
395
00:16:09,544 --> 00:16:11,194
Love is...magic?
396
00:16:11,212 --> 00:16:13,638
No, wait, it had something
to do with the universe
397
00:16:13,789 --> 00:16:16,457
and all the stuff
that makes one big thing.
398
00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:17,550
- Uh-huh.
399
00:16:17,869 --> 00:16:19,811
- And, and, and--
and what is real for some--
400
00:16:19,962 --> 00:16:21,813
nope, nope, that's not it, no.
401
00:16:21,889 --> 00:16:23,222
[groans]
Sorry, I lost it.
402
00:16:23,299 --> 00:16:25,132
I should have
licked that toad again.
403
00:16:25,210 --> 00:16:27,819
- You licked a toad?
- His name was Cane.
404
00:16:27,895 --> 00:16:30,488
He was so nice.
I don't feel good.
405
00:16:30,565 --> 00:16:33,474
Love is--
[retches]
406
00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:35,901
[snoring]
407
00:16:36,054 --> 00:16:38,329
- [laughs]
This is such a great night.
408
00:16:38,406 --> 00:16:42,149
I am so glad I didn't
sell you guys to that bear,
409
00:16:42,227 --> 00:16:44,985
which is 100%
what I was gonna do.
410
00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:47,488
Never trust me.
You hear me?
411
00:16:47,507 --> 00:16:49,081
Never trust me.
412
00:16:49,158 --> 00:16:51,400
Do you guys want
to go to Tijuana?
413
00:16:51,402 --> 00:16:54,086
- Someone's coming.
- Let's get out of here.
414
00:16:54,163 --> 00:16:56,764
- So we're just ignoring
the bear thing?
415
00:16:57,851 --> 00:16:59,759
- [gasps]
- Good evening, Tammy.
416
00:16:59,911 --> 00:17:01,502
Oh, you got bangs.
417
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:02,928
Oh, that's fun.
418
00:17:03,005 --> 00:17:05,931
[light music]
419
00:17:06,084 --> 00:17:08,342
♪ ♪
420
00:17:08,361 --> 00:17:10,253
- [whispering]
How did Lindsay get here?
421
00:17:10,255 --> 00:17:12,196
- I told you the only way
to make sure
422
00:17:12,273 --> 00:17:15,533
that something is fully dead
is to eat the face!
423
00:17:15,684 --> 00:17:16,850
- She's unkillable.
424
00:17:16,928 --> 00:17:17,943
In the old country,
425
00:17:18,020 --> 00:17:20,354
we have name
for creatures like her:
426
00:17:20,373 --> 00:17:21,280
Barbara.
427
00:17:21,432 --> 00:17:22,689
- Is she prettier than me?
428
00:17:22,767 --> 00:17:23,766
Don't answer that.
429
00:17:23,768 --> 00:17:24,784
Let's just get through
this wedding
430
00:17:24,860 --> 00:17:26,243
and we'll talk tonight.
431
00:17:26,396 --> 00:17:29,288
- Well, this is it.
Shel's big day.
432
00:17:29,440 --> 00:17:30,864
- And we'll be here for him,
433
00:17:30,942 --> 00:17:34,126
ready to pick up the pieces
of his shattered heart.
434
00:17:34,279 --> 00:17:36,387
- I love weddings.
435
00:17:36,539 --> 00:17:37,889
- Prepare to engage.
436
00:17:37,965 --> 00:17:39,465
- Thanks, Tchotch.
437
00:17:39,617 --> 00:17:41,951
[trash can bangs]
438
00:17:41,969 --> 00:17:45,288
Raccoon, you're alive!
Oh, thank goodness!
439
00:17:45,290 --> 00:17:46,972
- Wouldn't miss this
for the world.
440
00:17:47,049 --> 00:17:48,232
- Are you feeling okay?
441
00:17:48,384 --> 00:17:49,809
- Yeah, sure, but apparently
442
00:17:49,961 --> 00:17:52,719
I had a 0.02% blood toad level.
443
00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:54,906
Oh, yeah!
Hey, Shel.
444
00:17:55,015 --> 00:17:56,407
You sure you want
to go through with this?
445
00:17:56,559 --> 00:17:59,243
Now that I'm sober, it seems
like a whacked out idea.
446
00:17:59,395 --> 00:18:03,247
- Classic Raccoon.
I can't wait for your speech.
447
00:18:04,066 --> 00:18:05,825
Thank you for doing this.
448
00:18:05,901 --> 00:18:08,661
- It's the only way.
- Ominous.
449
00:18:08,737 --> 00:18:10,963
Save it for the ceremony.
450
00:18:11,833 --> 00:18:12,757
- Welcome, everyone.
451
00:18:12,834 --> 00:18:14,741
Thank you for joining us today
452
00:18:14,761 --> 00:18:17,261
to celebrate Shel and Lindsay.
453
00:18:17,413 --> 00:18:20,581
[birds whistling
"Here Comes the Bride"]
454
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,249
♪ ♪
455
00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:24,510
- Come to me, my love.
456
00:18:24,662 --> 00:18:30,024
♪ ♪
457
00:18:31,169 --> 00:18:34,445
Come on, Lindsay.
I'm right here.
458
00:18:34,597 --> 00:18:38,098
[soft dramatic music]
459
00:18:38,176 --> 00:18:40,267
- What do we do?
- Just vamp.
460
00:18:40,345 --> 00:18:43,512
[whistling
"Mary Had a Little Lamb"]
461
00:18:43,531 --> 00:18:45,939
♪ ♪
462
00:18:45,959 --> 00:18:48,534
- Maybe you should walk to her,
I don't know.
463
00:18:48,686 --> 00:18:53,297
- Honey, she's not moving.
- Shel, I'm so sorry.
464
00:18:54,467 --> 00:18:57,426
[high-pitched tone]
465
00:19:00,807 --> 00:19:03,790
I know this is going
to be hard, but over time--
466
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:05,368
oh, wait, here she comes.
467
00:19:05,386 --> 00:19:06,552
Wait, what?
468
00:19:06,629 --> 00:19:09,981
[high-pitched tone]
469
00:19:10,132 --> 00:19:12,558
[soft dramatic music]
470
00:19:12,635 --> 00:19:14,152
- She's walking!
471
00:19:14,228 --> 00:19:17,488
Are you seeing this?
I knew she could do it!
472
00:19:17,565 --> 00:19:18,714
- Uh-huh.
473
00:19:18,733 --> 00:19:19,824
- [sobbing]
474
00:19:19,975 --> 00:19:20,992
[laughter]
- What's happening?
475
00:19:21,143 --> 00:19:23,052
- [hisses]
Barbara!
476
00:19:23,054 --> 00:19:25,404
- It's so beautiful!
477
00:19:25,481 --> 00:19:30,576
♪ ♪
478
00:19:30,728 --> 00:19:33,087
[high-pitched tone stops]
479
00:19:35,508 --> 00:19:38,342
- Wow, this is magical.
480
00:19:38,419 --> 00:19:41,828
I'm gonna stray
from my prepared remarks.
481
00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:43,088
- Whichever's shorter!
482
00:19:43,241 --> 00:19:45,016
- You know, no matter how smart
we think we are,
483
00:19:45,167 --> 00:19:47,334
we may never understand love.
484
00:19:47,353 --> 00:19:50,763
I once heard it has something
to do with the universe
485
00:19:50,839 --> 00:19:54,025
and all the stuff
that makes one big thing.
486
00:19:54,919 --> 00:19:56,527
We can all see--
487
00:19:56,604 --> 00:19:57,678
- Shel?
488
00:19:57,697 --> 00:19:59,530
- Darla?
489
00:19:59,607 --> 00:20:02,274
Lindsay!
Honey?
490
00:20:02,351 --> 00:20:04,869
- Don't rope me into this.
- Darla.
491
00:20:05,020 --> 00:20:06,612
- What's going on here?
492
00:20:06,689 --> 00:20:08,188
- Well, he was about
to marry a shoe.
493
00:20:08,208 --> 00:20:12,768
- I--I'm overwhelmed
with emotion.
494
00:20:12,787 --> 00:20:14,603
And here come the tears.
495
00:20:14,605 --> 00:20:16,956
[sobbing]
496
00:20:17,032 --> 00:20:19,550
I don't know what to do here.
497
00:20:19,627 --> 00:20:23,054
[sobbing]
498
00:20:23,130 --> 00:20:26,298
What do I do?
[sobbing]
499
00:20:26,451 --> 00:20:29,301
What do I do?
500
00:20:29,454 --> 00:20:31,896
You know what?
You should all probably go.
501
00:20:31,973 --> 00:20:34,440
This is going to take a while.
502
00:20:36,552 --> 00:20:39,478
- Congratulations.
- Bye. Thank you.
503
00:20:39,555 --> 00:20:41,572
- Eh, this isn't the worst
wedding I've been to.
504
00:20:41,649 --> 00:20:44,800
Anyone remember Renee Zels
and Kenny Chess?
505
00:20:44,819 --> 00:20:46,744
- Exactly.
506
00:20:46,895 --> 00:20:48,246
- Technically,
we played the gig,
507
00:20:48,397 --> 00:20:50,289
so what about those worms?
508
00:20:54,587 --> 00:20:55,811
- Got my animals?
509
00:20:55,830 --> 00:20:57,421
- I got something better.
510
00:20:58,833 --> 00:20:59,832
- [ribbits]
511
00:20:59,908 --> 00:21:00,925
- This is Cane.
512
00:21:01,002 --> 00:21:02,985
He's gonna show you
a wild night.
513
00:21:02,987 --> 00:21:04,262
- All right, settle down.
514
00:21:04,413 --> 00:21:07,156
First timers, listen close.
Everyone gets one lick--
515
00:21:07,174 --> 00:21:08,582
- [gulps]
- What did you do?
516
00:21:08,601 --> 00:21:13,662
- What's the big deal?
I just--blast off!
517
00:21:13,664 --> 00:21:14,755
[growls]
- Oof!
518
00:21:14,774 --> 00:21:17,483
[groans]
519
00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:23,698
- Oof, thank you, man.
Crazy bear.
520
00:21:25,693 --> 00:21:27,618
- Bento.
[all cheering]
521
00:21:28,179 --> 00:21:29,287
- That's nice, Jen and Gabby.