1 00:00:03,483 --> 00:00:07,563 OK, champ, you ready for this? First thing first your grip, yeah? 2 00:00:07,563 --> 00:00:11,163 Goes across your finger ridges, not the lifeline, ridges of the fingers. 3 00:00:11,163 --> 00:00:15,323 Let's get relaxing in those knees, bobbing. Straighten your body, but bend your legs. 4 00:00:15,323 --> 00:00:17,323 Straighten but bend, straighten but bend. 5 00:00:17,323 --> 00:00:20,523 Now collapse that left leg, just collapse the left leg a bit, let it. 6 00:00:20,523 --> 00:00:26,043 Ted, you look like you're having a seizure, mate. The whole skill to this, right, is being relaxed 7 00:00:26,043 --> 00:00:29,203 and stiff at the same time. 8 00:00:29,203 --> 00:00:33,563 Be stiff and relaxed?! That's the game, that's the sweet little mystery of it all! 9 00:00:33,563 --> 00:00:37,683 Can't I just hit it? Yeah, course you can. If you want to do that, just so you know, mate, 10 00:00:37,683 --> 00:00:40,243 Tiger Woods didn't hit a ball for ten years, he just hit mat. 11 00:00:40,243 --> 00:00:44,443 So you, you're better than Tiger Woods, are you? Go on, mate, see how you get on. Can't wait to see. 12 00:00:44,443 --> 00:00:47,723 Everyone watch! Watch the kid! He knows better than his dad! 13 00:00:53,403 --> 00:00:55,363 Shot! Shot! 14 00:00:55,363 --> 00:00:57,163 Yeah, boy! 15 00:00:57,163 --> 00:00:59,923 Oh, my day! He's hit the tree! 16 00:00:59,923 --> 00:01:01,683 He's hit the tree! 17 00:01:07,363 --> 00:01:11,003 What? Dick eye! He's hit that very clean! 18 00:01:11,003 --> 00:01:13,763 Ain't he though, ain't he though? 19 00:01:13,763 --> 00:01:17,363 He has creamed 20 balls like that, mate. That's half a bucket. 20 00:01:17,363 --> 00:01:20,203 Yeah, you can see the way his body's put together, his whole 21 00:01:20,203 --> 00:01:24,283 line's in total symmetry and he's got a natural hand-eye coordination. 22 00:01:24,283 --> 00:01:27,043 Exactly. You've either got it, or you ain't. 23 00:01:27,043 --> 00:01:30,363 Well, you ain't got it. You couldn't catch a grapefruit in a windsock. What? 24 00:01:30,363 --> 00:01:33,203 He's a natural. He's a true talent. 25 00:01:33,203 --> 00:01:35,523 He needs to be nurtured very carefully. 26 00:01:35,523 --> 00:01:37,723 I'm already five moves in front of you, Dad. 27 00:01:37,723 --> 00:01:41,443 I've entered him into the Junior Oaks Tournament down here. 28 00:01:41,443 --> 00:01:45,963 A tournament? Already? No, you need to slow down, boy. It's too early. 29 00:01:45,963 --> 00:01:49,763 He's 12 years old, mate! That's middle aged in sporting terms. 30 00:01:49,763 --> 00:01:51,563 He's practically a pensioner! 31 00:01:51,563 --> 00:01:54,883 Gary, I was playing golf when you were still eating bits of Lego. 32 00:01:54,883 --> 00:01:56,643 Now let me in here! 33 00:01:56,643 --> 00:01:58,603 OK. OK. 34 00:01:58,603 --> 00:02:02,283 I'll take you on in a coaching adviser role, 35 00:02:02,283 --> 00:02:05,523 but I am management here, mate, so career strategy, 36 00:02:05,523 --> 00:02:09,683 brand endorsements, that's very much my domain. 37 00:02:09,683 --> 00:02:12,883 Yeah, whatever. Then welcome to the team. 38 00:02:12,883 --> 00:02:15,283 We're going to do great things. 39 00:02:34,883 --> 00:02:36,443 Oh... 40 00:02:36,443 --> 00:02:37,883 Ooh! 41 00:02:37,883 --> 00:02:40,563 Now, tell me are you nearly there yet, or what? 42 00:02:42,243 --> 00:02:45,003 So, how's the wedding planning going like? 43 00:02:45,003 --> 00:02:47,723 Yeah, yeah, so we're going big with it, obvs, yeah, yeah. 44 00:02:47,723 --> 00:02:51,083 Going to do it like in a castle and stuff because you know like the King thing, 45 00:02:51,083 --> 00:02:54,683 because you know we are the Kings. Wow! Sounds ambitious, babe. 46 00:02:54,683 --> 00:03:00,643 Mm. You going to get a wedding planner, so it's not horrible and tacky? Yeah. 47 00:03:00,643 --> 00:03:04,003 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, just... Just sussing out a few as we speak, 48 00:03:04,003 --> 00:03:06,763 you know, just depends on where we're going, destinas-ion wise, 49 00:03:06,763 --> 00:03:09,763 you know, get a plane to the old... WHISTLES 50 00:03:09,763 --> 00:03:10,843 Yeah. Mm... 51 00:03:10,843 --> 00:03:14,923 I mean, I'm obviously a stylist by trade, but I have actually 52 00:03:14,923 --> 00:03:18,003 been thinking about going into the weddings medium. Do mine! 53 00:03:20,603 --> 00:03:25,803 If you fancy, do ours, I mean if you - so would like to do that? 54 00:03:25,803 --> 00:03:29,843 Well, I suppose I was thinking about starting small, you know, 55 00:03:29,843 --> 00:03:34,723 something a bit base, and then just working my way up the design ladder. 56 00:03:34,723 --> 00:03:39,003 So, I'm not making no promises, but I could pop round, 57 00:03:39,003 --> 00:03:42,963 maybe bring some mood boards, bring my Pinterest up. 58 00:03:42,963 --> 00:03:45,763 Oh, cool, that is cool, I'd love... I'd love that, 59 00:03:45,763 --> 00:03:49,603 because you know what, 60 00:03:45,763 --> 00:03:49,603 I absolutely... 61 00:03:45,763 --> 00:03:49,603 CLATTERING AND BANGING 62 00:03:50,963 --> 00:03:53,803 When... When you... when are you thinking, babes? 63 00:03:53,803 --> 00:03:56,643 Do you want to pop round tomorrow or something? What are you doing? 64 00:03:56,643 --> 00:03:59,323 Oh, er... Just... Just wondering if... What this is. 65 00:03:59,323 --> 00:04:02,363 I mean, what is it and shall we have a go on it? 66 00:04:02,363 --> 00:04:04,643 Terri, you never use any of the machines. 67 00:04:04,643 --> 00:04:05,923 No, no, it's... 68 00:04:05,923 --> 00:04:08,363 Oh, it's the cramp! It's... Ooh! Got 'em in both legs. 69 00:04:08,363 --> 00:04:10,803 Terri, stand up. You've got to stretch it out! 70 00:04:10,803 --> 00:04:15,163 No, you're all right, babe. I'm going to ping you over a text, speak to you later, chinkers, all right? 71 00:04:17,803 --> 00:04:20,643 Hi, darling. Oh, hiya, Den. 72 00:04:34,643 --> 00:04:39,283 Oi, oi, whih-woo! Someone's in his work garms. 73 00:04:39,283 --> 00:04:41,963 Talk about giving me a little fizzy flow there, babe. 74 00:04:43,603 --> 00:04:46,403 Oh... Sorry, babe, what's going on here? 75 00:04:46,403 --> 00:04:47,923 It's a putting green for Teddy. 76 00:04:47,923 --> 00:04:50,523 Right, no. OK, OK, brilliant, that's... 77 00:04:50,523 --> 00:04:53,123 Sorry what's, what's brought all this on? 78 00:04:53,123 --> 00:04:55,563 He has the gift, my kiwi, the gift! 79 00:04:55,563 --> 00:05:00,043 He has hit 100 balls and he's hit every one like Rory McIlroy. 80 00:05:00,043 --> 00:05:04,203 Sorry, I don't know who that is. He's an amazing golfer, babe. Right. And so is Teddy. Right. 81 00:05:04,203 --> 00:05:07,003 Honestly, babe, I've already entered him in a tournament. Oh! 82 00:05:07,003 --> 00:05:10,723 Righto, moving fast then, OK. What date? 83 00:05:10,723 --> 00:05:12,643 It's a school day, he's got nothing on. 84 00:05:12,643 --> 00:05:15,123 Well, he has school on, Gary, so what date? 85 00:05:16,283 --> 00:05:18,723 Just looking at his diary. Mm-hm. 86 00:05:18,723 --> 00:05:20,283 27th. No, babe! 87 00:05:20,283 --> 00:05:23,283 That's his spelling bee final, you divvy. He can't miss that! 88 00:05:23,283 --> 00:05:26,363 Spelling? Really?! Yes, spelling, Gary. 89 00:05:26,363 --> 00:05:30,843 Babe, we need to invest now and whatever we invest now will come back ten fold later. 90 00:05:30,843 --> 00:05:34,763 Right, right. Well, I'll just leave that one with you, OK. 91 00:05:34,763 --> 00:05:38,283 Listen, have you spoken to your mother yet about the wedding? 92 00:05:38,283 --> 00:05:42,323 Yeah, yeah. Yes. Really? Yes, I have spoken. Babe, because she will not stop texting me. 93 00:05:42,323 --> 00:05:46,203 She's even started emailing me on eBay. It's making my bum itch. 94 00:05:46,203 --> 00:05:48,763 DOORBELL RINGS 95 00:05:51,123 --> 00:05:54,603 I thought you was Amazon Prime. Yes, well, sorry to disappoint. 96 00:05:54,603 --> 00:05:57,843 What do you want, Stuart? It's my bin, you said next-door's got it. 97 00:05:57,843 --> 00:06:02,123 Yeah, has got it, you can see it clear as day, number 41, look. See? 98 00:06:02,123 --> 00:06:05,123 Mate, he's using that not as his primary bin, but as an overflow 99 00:06:05,123 --> 00:06:08,843 bin, for all the stuff he doesn't think's worthy of his own bin. 100 00:06:08,843 --> 00:06:11,523 What do you think I should do? Just go and take it, mate. 101 00:06:11,523 --> 00:06:14,323 You honestly think I should just take it? You've lost enough, mate. 102 00:06:14,323 --> 00:06:17,003 Go and take it. All right, fine. I'll take it. Do it, go for it. 103 00:06:17,003 --> 00:06:19,643 I am, I am doing it. Mate, do it. Mate, do it. I'm doing it! 104 00:06:19,643 --> 00:06:23,803 Take it! Oi, oi, oi, oi, chavro, not across there, mate. What?! 105 00:06:23,803 --> 00:06:26,563 There's a gap here. Walk up the drive and then back down. 106 00:06:26,563 --> 00:06:30,163 Why? Don't take verge liberties. Well, there's nothing there. 107 00:06:30,163 --> 00:06:31,883 Mate, it's not a bridge, mate. 108 00:06:31,883 --> 00:06:33,203 Fine. 109 00:06:36,483 --> 00:06:40,963 Stu! Stu! Stu! Da-da! 110 00:06:40,963 --> 00:06:42,203 What? 111 00:06:42,203 --> 00:06:44,123 Dack-dahn. What's da-da? 112 00:06:44,123 --> 00:06:46,163 Dack-dahn. What? 113 00:06:46,163 --> 00:06:49,283 Duck down! Duck down? Yes. 114 00:06:49,283 --> 00:06:50,323 OK. Sh! 115 00:06:54,683 --> 00:06:56,043 Stu! What? 116 00:06:56,043 --> 00:06:58,363 All clear, mate. All clear. 117 00:06:58,363 --> 00:07:01,723 You don't need to tell me it's all clear! 118 00:07:01,723 --> 00:07:03,083 Just tell me when it isn't. 119 00:07:05,763 --> 00:07:11,483 Stu! Stu! You vanished, I couldn't see you for a second. Yeah, shut, up! 120 00:07:14,523 --> 00:07:17,003 Go Stu! Go, go, go, Stu! Go, Stu! 121 00:07:17,003 --> 00:07:19,123 Hey, what you doing? 122 00:07:19,123 --> 00:07:22,683 Oh, yeah, sorry, no, it's, um... The.... 123 00:07:22,683 --> 00:07:26,123 It's actually quite easily explained. I believe there... 124 00:07:26,123 --> 00:07:33,363 There's been a mix-up and you may have one of my...recycling bins. 125 00:07:33,363 --> 00:07:34,723 Calling me a thief, bruv? 126 00:07:34,723 --> 00:07:37,683 Absol... Absolutely not, no, it's just.... Mate... 127 00:07:37,683 --> 00:07:41,043 Mate, mate, it's Gary... Gary King from next door, what lives here. 128 00:07:41,043 --> 00:07:44,643 Yeah? That's Stuart Williams he lives at number 41, the bin there. That, 41. 129 00:07:44,643 --> 00:07:46,843 These bins were here when I moved in, so you'll have 130 00:07:46,843 --> 00:07:49,883 to take it back with the previous tenant, and step back from the car! Sorry. 131 00:07:49,883 --> 00:07:53,523 Me again, mate. Me again, so coming over, yeah, coming over. 132 00:07:53,523 --> 00:07:57,123 Bruv... Why are you walking up there for? Oi! You could cross there. 133 00:07:57,123 --> 00:07:59,123 Driveway code, mate, driveway code. 134 00:07:59,123 --> 00:08:01,963 Why's he walking up there? I've got no idea. Nearly here. 135 00:08:03,243 --> 00:08:05,883 Listen, mate. I know what you are doing. You've sensed 136 00:08:05,883 --> 00:08:09,603 the weakest, most vulnerable person on this whole crescent 137 00:08:09,603 --> 00:08:12,923 and thus you are now picking on him and making his life a misery, 138 00:08:12,923 --> 00:08:16,083 but his life is already miserable and pathetic and sad. His wife has 139 00:08:16,083 --> 00:08:19,203 left him, mate, and he is drinking all the time on the booze, ain't ya? 140 00:08:19,203 --> 00:08:21,683 Right, Gary, he doesn't need to know all this, I just... 141 00:08:21,683 --> 00:08:25,283 He does need to know, mate. He needs to know how broken you are, mate. I am not broken. 142 00:08:25,283 --> 00:08:28,323 He's shattered. I am not broken. You are vulnerable. I'm not vuln... 143 00:08:28,323 --> 00:08:31,763 I am not vulnerable. Mate, you are broken. I'm not broken! You're Mr Broken, mate. 144 00:08:31,763 --> 00:08:34,443 I'm just going through a break-up, I'm dealing with it in the normal 145 00:08:34,443 --> 00:08:38,523 way that people deal with things like that. You are now dealing... You're walking around in pyjamas 146 00:08:38,523 --> 00:08:42,443 with no shoes and socks on. I was just going for an afternoon walk... Walking around outside...? 147 00:08:42,443 --> 00:08:43,563 Ah! You both done?! 148 00:08:46,403 --> 00:08:48,403 Yeah. 149 00:08:48,403 --> 00:08:52,683 Actually, no. One other thing, you shouldn't park your car like that. 150 00:08:52,683 --> 00:08:56,323 Oh, my God! Because it's not - you can't park your car like that. 151 00:08:56,323 --> 00:08:57,723 Does it really matter? 152 00:08:57,723 --> 00:08:59,363 Yeah, it does actually, mate, 153 00:08:59,363 --> 00:09:02,403 because actually what it is, is that it's a legal turning point 154 00:09:02,403 --> 00:09:05,643 because it's a cul-de-sac, so people can't turn round. 155 00:09:05,643 --> 00:09:08,003 Bruv, what are you? Are you the council? 156 00:09:08,003 --> 00:09:11,243 Pretty much, actually. I'm what's known as the crescent warden. 157 00:09:11,243 --> 00:09:13,323 That ain't the same thing as the council. 158 00:09:13,323 --> 00:09:16,243 So my advice would be contact the ACTUAL council 159 00:09:16,243 --> 00:09:18,603 and I will speak to them. 160 00:09:18,603 --> 00:09:21,363 Fair play. Yeah, fair play in a way. 161 00:09:21,363 --> 00:09:22,843 I just... 162 00:09:24,683 --> 00:09:27,443 I just want my bin. He just wants his bin back. 163 00:09:27,443 --> 00:09:30,283 Take your bin. Just take it, just do it, mate. Stop messing 164 00:09:30,283 --> 00:09:33,083 around Stuart, take it. Yeah, it's just it's sort of... 165 00:09:34,403 --> 00:09:37,243 ..it's quite full up with your rubbish. That ain't my problem. 166 00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:40,163 You're right, it's absolutely not your problem, very much my problem. 167 00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:45,003 I need to go get my tea, because Terri's done tea tonight, so. I don't care. So see you later, yeah. 168 00:10:03,723 --> 00:10:06,683 We're ready for you now, Mr King. Thank you, OK. 169 00:10:06,683 --> 00:10:08,763 Good luck with your stuff. 170 00:10:08,763 --> 00:10:13,843 Thank you for letting me into your kingdom at such short notice, Mrs Grant. 171 00:10:13,843 --> 00:10:16,083 Always so lovely to see you. 172 00:10:16,083 --> 00:10:21,003 Teddy is showing a lot of potential as being an elite sportsperson, 173 00:10:21,003 --> 00:10:24,203 a golfer, and that's where you come in. 174 00:10:24,203 --> 00:10:27,163 You see, he has his first major tournament on the same 175 00:10:27,163 --> 00:10:29,203 day as your spelling game. 176 00:10:29,203 --> 00:10:33,003 It's not a game, Mr King. It's the final of the competition. 177 00:10:33,003 --> 00:10:35,203 But can we move it? Move it?! 178 00:10:35,203 --> 00:10:37,723 Shift it a couple of days, budge it up on the schedule, 179 00:10:37,723 --> 00:10:41,963 drop it somewhere else. Shunt it, Mrs Grant, shunt it. 180 00:10:41,963 --> 00:10:44,163 No, it's far too late to reschedule. 181 00:10:44,163 --> 00:10:47,803 There are eight schools involved from four counties. 182 00:10:47,803 --> 00:10:50,363 Then we have ourselves a crossroads. 183 00:10:50,363 --> 00:10:53,723 He has two choices, two roads which he could go down. 184 00:10:53,723 --> 00:10:58,363 The left-hand road is a road of books and spelling 185 00:10:58,363 --> 00:11:02,283 and librarianisms, and the right junction, 186 00:11:02,283 --> 00:11:06,563 well, that is the journey to being the greatest golfer of all time. 187 00:11:06,563 --> 00:11:07,923 So a T-junction. 188 00:11:10,563 --> 00:11:12,483 If you like. Are you picking on me? 189 00:11:12,483 --> 00:11:16,083 No, I'm not picking on you. Just feels a little bit like you are picking on me, so... 190 00:11:16,083 --> 00:11:19,363 Look, Mr King, we've been here before, have we not? 191 00:11:19,363 --> 00:11:24,403 What? What are you saying? When you pulled Teddy out of school for football trials with Barcelona. 192 00:11:24,403 --> 00:11:28,483 Do you recall? Sort of, little bit... Actually, no, I don't recall actually. My brain's not working. 193 00:11:28,483 --> 00:11:31,923 I think getting a good 194 00:11:28,483 --> 00:11:31,923 education can definitely... 195 00:11:28,483 --> 00:11:31,923 BLOWS RASPBERRY 196 00:11:33,283 --> 00:11:35,363 Can def... 197 00:11:33,283 --> 00:11:35,363 BLOWS RASPBERRY 198 00:11:38,043 --> 00:11:42,443 I can definitely secure financial... BLOWS RASPBERRY 199 00:11:42,443 --> 00:11:45,243 OK, let's just ask Teddy what he wants to do. 200 00:11:45,243 --> 00:11:49,563 Teddy, what would you like to do? Considering you've worked so hard... 201 00:11:49,563 --> 00:11:51,203 Ah-ah! Sh. 202 00:11:51,203 --> 00:11:53,043 Sshh-tshh. 203 00:11:53,043 --> 00:11:56,763 Ted, mate... Ted, you've got to decide now, 204 00:11:56,763 --> 00:11:59,803 this is for the rest of your life, you have to make this decision. 205 00:11:59,803 --> 00:12:03,043 Do you want to life of spelling, being a little speller, or 206 00:12:03,043 --> 00:12:08,323 golf superstardom with a mansion and an infinity pool? Choice is yours. 207 00:12:10,123 --> 00:12:13,123 Golf. Go on, say it again. Golf. There it is. 208 00:12:13,123 --> 00:12:14,483 There it is. 209 00:12:14,483 --> 00:12:18,803 Look, you did your best, but the boy has decided. 210 00:12:18,803 --> 00:12:21,203 Shake, come on, don't be a bad loser. 211 00:12:21,203 --> 00:12:23,843 Come on, you need to shake on it. 212 00:12:23,843 --> 00:12:26,723 Sheila. Sheila. She-she. 213 00:12:26,723 --> 00:12:28,963 Come on, Sheila. 214 00:12:26,723 --> 00:12:28,963 WHISTLES 215 00:12:28,963 --> 00:12:31,523 There we go. 216 00:12:31,523 --> 00:12:33,723 Good girl. 217 00:12:33,723 --> 00:12:35,843 That's a shake. Ted, come on, mate. 218 00:12:35,843 --> 00:12:38,683 Teddy King shall play golf. Come on, son, let's go. 219 00:12:40,203 --> 00:12:42,203 # Make the body move, you got to 220 00:12:43,883 --> 00:12:45,363 # Let the body groove 221 00:12:47,363 --> 00:12:49,323 # Make the body move, you've got to 222 00:12:51,123 --> 00:12:52,163 # Let the body groove 223 00:12:54,723 --> 00:12:58,523 # Weekend and you're ready to make a move 224 00:12:58,523 --> 00:13:01,243 # Been working nine to five, it ain't so smooth 225 00:13:01,243 --> 00:13:04,763 # So Monday and it's stress up on your life 226 00:13:04,763 --> 00:13:09,003 # And you know that music really beats life, so you got to... # 227 00:13:09,003 --> 00:13:11,483 Hello, babe. Welcome to Chez King. 228 00:13:11,483 --> 00:13:14,843 Do you know how it's impossible to park on your road? No? 229 00:13:14,843 --> 00:13:17,483 Yeah, I had to park like 1,000 steps away. 230 00:13:17,483 --> 00:13:20,243 Oh, it's just one big room, is it? Very cute. 231 00:13:20,243 --> 00:13:22,723 Yeah, sorry about all the parking malarkey. 232 00:13:22,723 --> 00:13:26,043 It's our annoying new neighbour. My Gary's sorting him out, so... 233 00:13:27,083 --> 00:13:28,283 Right, then. 234 00:13:29,843 --> 00:13:32,643 So, I've drawn up some mood boards. Yay. 235 00:13:32,643 --> 00:13:35,243 These are some castle weddings. Wow! 236 00:13:36,763 --> 00:13:38,963 Now, are you sure about Scotland and Ireland? 237 00:13:38,963 --> 00:13:44,043 Oh, yeah, yeah. We've always said about it. Got our hearts set on it really, you know, so... OK. 238 00:13:44,043 --> 00:13:49,163 I get it. It's just I've always really wanted to go to a wedding in Italy, so... 239 00:13:55,163 --> 00:13:59,043 Nah. OK, that's fine. I mean, this can still have taste and style. 240 00:13:59,043 --> 00:14:02,803 Yeah. Ooh! So I'm thinking Meze for food. 241 00:14:02,803 --> 00:14:06,843 Ooh! Or, maybe, a suckling pig, on a spit. 242 00:14:06,843 --> 00:14:09,763 SCOTTISH ACCENT: Get in my belly! Or if we go to Ireland, like... 243 00:14:09,763 --> 00:14:11,883 IRISH ACCENT: Get in my belly! 244 00:14:11,883 --> 00:14:13,483 DOORBELL RINGS 245 00:14:15,003 --> 00:14:16,963 Terri? 246 00:14:16,963 --> 00:14:18,843 It's me, Denise. 247 00:14:18,843 --> 00:14:21,003 Like that one. 248 00:14:21,003 --> 00:14:23,683 DOORBELL 249 00:14:21,003 --> 00:14:23,683 That's nice, I like that. 250 00:14:21,003 --> 00:14:23,683 Are you going to get that? 251 00:14:23,683 --> 00:14:27,483 I know you're in there. Oh, no, that'll be nothing, don't worry about it. Sorry, where were we? 252 00:14:29,603 --> 00:14:32,843 Oh, all right, Denise. Sorry, we're in the middle of something here. 253 00:14:32,843 --> 00:14:35,443 Did Gary talk to you about the wedding, did he? 254 00:14:35,443 --> 00:14:39,683 No, he hasn't, he's avoiding me. It's like you're both ignoring me, Terri. 255 00:14:39,683 --> 00:14:41,883 Oh? A woman could get offended by such behaviour. 256 00:14:41,883 --> 00:14:44,643 Feel like the smelly kid at the disco. 257 00:14:44,643 --> 00:14:47,283 I'm sorry, babe. What, you just knocking just now, were you? 258 00:14:47,283 --> 00:14:51,243 Didn't hear a thing, did we, Chlo-girl? Yes, we did. You said to leave it. 259 00:14:51,243 --> 00:14:52,843 Hiya, Den. 260 00:14:54,683 --> 00:14:57,283 Ooh, whatcha... Whatcha... What you got there, babes, eh? 261 00:14:57,283 --> 00:14:59,923 Spreadsheets, costings, quotes for the wedding. 262 00:14:59,923 --> 00:15:02,043 Actually, can we sit down for this? 263 00:15:02,043 --> 00:15:05,043 Sorry, Den. It's just we're in the middle of something here. 264 00:15:05,043 --> 00:15:08,603 Chloe's actually going to be our new wedding planner, so... 265 00:15:08,603 --> 00:15:11,723 Is she now? Yeah. What do you need a wedding planner for? 266 00:15:11,723 --> 00:15:15,403 Blimey, when I got married you just roped in the bridesmaid who drunk the least. 267 00:15:15,403 --> 00:15:19,363 Well, Den, I'm a professional. Can we please sit down now, have a cup of tea? 268 00:15:33,603 --> 00:15:38,723 Lully, Dad, lully, mate. That's lully, boy. Very well done, very well done. 269 00:15:38,723 --> 00:15:41,203 What have you come as? I'm the daddy caddy. 270 00:15:41,203 --> 00:15:45,563 Daddy caddy? Sounds like something sort of adult nappy. 271 00:15:45,563 --> 00:15:50,283 Son, cast your eyes upon the Teddy King golfing arena. 272 00:15:50,283 --> 00:15:52,763 Cool! What don't you have a little swing, boy? 273 00:15:52,763 --> 00:15:55,163 Smash it as hard as you like, ain't going nowhere. 274 00:15:55,163 --> 00:16:00,083 Bit tired, Grandad. Then sleep is needed, off you go. Get some shut-eye, boy. 275 00:16:00,083 --> 00:16:02,603 Sleep?! He needs to get his practise in. 276 00:16:02,603 --> 00:16:05,443 I'm in charge of his schedule, you deal with the practise. 277 00:16:05,443 --> 00:16:08,083 Well, it's hard for him to practise if he's fast asleep! 278 00:16:08,083 --> 00:16:12,043 You even got a guest list? It was like the first thing I did actually, so... 279 00:16:13,163 --> 00:16:14,483 There you go. 280 00:16:16,243 --> 00:16:20,843 There's no sign of the Canvey Island Kings, or the Orpington lot. 281 00:16:20,843 --> 00:16:23,723 Winkle, my cousin Creamy. Creamy? 282 00:16:23,723 --> 00:16:25,283 I don't know him, Denise, 283 00:16:25,283 --> 00:16:29,003 and based on that name alone, he ain't coming, all right? This is my wedding, OK? 284 00:16:29,003 --> 00:16:30,363 They are family! 285 00:16:31,683 --> 00:16:33,443 I'm going to go. 286 00:16:33,443 --> 00:16:37,483 Boo doesn't like being around loud nasty voices, so... 287 00:16:37,483 --> 00:16:39,563 It's probably for the best. No, no! 288 00:16:39,563 --> 00:16:42,523 Stay, I mean we'll have a cup of tea and you know... 289 00:16:42,523 --> 00:16:46,323 Cos you're my wedding planner and, and this is my wedding, so... 290 00:16:49,443 --> 00:16:53,723 OK. Come on, Boo, let's go home. Say bye-bye. HIGH PITCH: Bye-bye! 291 00:16:53,723 --> 00:16:55,643 Catch you later then, Chlo! 292 00:17:00,683 --> 00:17:03,203 Did you make me that cup of tea? Going now. 293 00:17:07,843 --> 00:17:11,083 Gal? Yes, darling. You all right, babe? 294 00:17:12,683 --> 00:17:16,483 No. No, no, I'm not, babe, no. 295 00:17:16,483 --> 00:17:19,083 See, your mum's in there being a bit busy. 296 00:17:21,003 --> 00:17:23,043 Mm-hm. Didn't tell her, did ya? 297 00:17:24,083 --> 00:17:29,203 No. You said you did...and you didn't. 298 00:17:29,203 --> 00:17:31,683 I mean, she's up in there grinding my gears real bad, 299 00:17:31,683 --> 00:17:33,163 she's about to cop a doughboy. 300 00:17:33,163 --> 00:17:36,603 I'm a little bit befuddled about this situation because like 301 00:17:36,603 --> 00:17:40,723 your demeanour is saying one thing and your words another, so... 302 00:17:40,723 --> 00:17:46,163 Oh, no, I'm next level livid with you, Gary. Fuming in fact. 303 00:17:46,163 --> 00:17:49,323 Yeah, but what it is, is with your face is smiling, it seems 304 00:17:49,323 --> 00:17:53,243 so happy, but then with your words you're quite damaging and quite hard for me to hear. 305 00:17:53,243 --> 00:17:56,243 Yeah, that's because I don't want anyone knowing just how 306 00:17:56,243 --> 00:18:01,523 incredibly angry I am. I mean, I'm stir fry crazy actually, so... 307 00:18:02,723 --> 00:18:06,443 What do you reckon, Tel? Yeah, it looks really great, Gal. Well done. 308 00:18:06,443 --> 00:18:08,683 Do you mean that, like you love the arena, or...? 309 00:18:10,483 --> 00:18:14,523 We'll just... We can probably just scale it back and stuff, so... Yeah. I love you. 310 00:18:14,523 --> 00:18:16,363 OK, whatever. 311 00:18:16,363 --> 00:18:17,683 Love you, smudge. 312 00:18:24,363 --> 00:18:26,603 Yes! Party's just starting! 313 00:18:26,603 --> 00:18:30,403 Let's do this, let's do this, yes, yes, yes. It's happening! 314 00:18:30,403 --> 00:18:32,643 You good, yeah,? You and Sades are good, yeah? 315 00:18:32,643 --> 00:18:36,163 Hey, what's happening? Hey, this fiasco anything to do with you? Eh! 316 00:18:36,163 --> 00:18:38,443 Long time, babe! You all right? 317 00:18:38,443 --> 00:18:41,243 Go inside! Oh, my brother, are you good, yeah? 318 00:18:41,243 --> 00:18:44,563 Go and get a drink, yeah? Hey... Hey, mate, what...? What? 319 00:18:44,563 --> 00:18:46,883 What now, bruv? What do you mean "what now"? 320 00:18:46,883 --> 00:18:49,523 You've commandeered the whole cul-de-sac. It's like an NCP! 321 00:18:49,523 --> 00:18:52,563 You've blocked my drive, mate. It's like joyriders are parked here. 322 00:18:52,563 --> 00:18:55,403 You could get a bus out of there. You want me to do it for you? 323 00:18:55,403 --> 00:18:59,563 That is a legal turning point! You said that before. 324 00:18:59,563 --> 00:19:04,443 And I'll say it again cos it... Honestly, I'm in a rush, yeah, a real rush, my son has a very 325 00:19:04,443 --> 00:19:07,403 prestigious golf tournament that I must get to. 326 00:19:07,403 --> 00:19:09,083 Oh, g-g-golf? 327 00:19:09,083 --> 00:19:12,483 Oh, really that's actually... That's interesting, Gary, tell me more about that. 328 00:19:12,483 --> 00:19:15,723 Well, it's at Pinewood, just round the corner there. 329 00:19:15,723 --> 00:19:19,883 Beautiful, 18-holer, 50 entrees from round the country, you know, 330 00:19:19,883 --> 00:19:22,483 top golfers, top young golfers and my Teddy is... 331 00:19:22,483 --> 00:19:24,843 What, he's one of them? Yeah, his first tournament. 332 00:19:24,843 --> 00:19:29,363 He's only taken up the game recent like, and you couldn't imagine. He's a bad boy, yeah. Yeah, yeah. 333 00:19:29,363 --> 00:19:31,403 I'm excited. Oh, mate! 334 00:19:31,403 --> 00:19:34,243 You're boring me, mate! Let's do this! 335 00:19:35,723 --> 00:19:37,763 Get the cars moved, mate! Shut up! 336 00:19:37,763 --> 00:19:39,643 Don't to come down hard, mate! Serious. 337 00:19:39,643 --> 00:19:41,283 Love a party, but 10am. 338 00:19:41,283 --> 00:19:44,163 Boys, what's going on? What kind of people are ya? 339 00:20:02,043 --> 00:20:05,163 A busy restaurant so I couldn't make a scene? 340 00:20:05,163 --> 00:20:07,843 This ain't my first rodeo, Den. 341 00:20:07,843 --> 00:20:09,083 So talk. 342 00:20:11,243 --> 00:20:14,203 I got a deal for you on the table. 343 00:20:14,203 --> 00:20:18,843 I'll give you three of the Orpington Kings, two of the Canvey Island lot. 344 00:20:18,843 --> 00:20:22,763 Very gracious of you. I'm sensing a but in there. 345 00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:24,763 Haven't actually finished, thank you. 346 00:20:26,403 --> 00:20:31,003 And your cousin Creamy, but Winkle can't come, Gary hates him. 347 00:20:31,003 --> 00:20:34,803 And there's the but. That's not the big but actually, the biggest but is yet to come 348 00:20:34,803 --> 00:20:36,843 if you'll let me finish, so... 349 00:20:36,843 --> 00:20:40,763 I will give you all of that and you can make the bridesmaid dresses, 350 00:20:40,763 --> 00:20:43,443 but you let me run the rest on my terms, 351 00:20:43,443 --> 00:20:48,363 that includes Chloe as the wedding planner and you stop being busy. 352 00:20:48,363 --> 00:20:52,083 I am not busy. Oh, you're so busy. 353 00:20:52,083 --> 00:20:55,323 I'm not busy. You're very busy. I am not busy. Busy. 354 00:20:55,323 --> 00:20:57,083 I am not busy. 355 00:21:03,083 --> 00:21:06,163 Oh, yeah, and it's in Ireland. 356 00:21:06,163 --> 00:21:11,203 Overseas? A foreign wedding? Not of this shores? Are you for real?! 357 00:21:11,203 --> 00:21:14,923 Selfish. It's Ireland, Denise. It's like 40 quid on Aer Lingus. 358 00:21:14,923 --> 00:21:19,963 I am dumbstruck. So much can go wrong with going away it's a lot to ask of people. 359 00:21:19,963 --> 00:21:23,923 What about Gemma and Franco, Cancun? We'll be different. 360 00:21:23,923 --> 00:21:26,403 Will you? Will you really? 361 00:21:26,403 --> 00:21:30,003 150 people was invited, seven turned up, 362 00:21:30,003 --> 00:21:34,203 was heart-breaking for those of us there, all the photos was close ups. 363 00:21:34,203 --> 00:21:39,843 You listen here. This is our wedding, we do it our way, OK? 364 00:21:39,843 --> 00:21:41,443 Fine. 365 00:21:41,443 --> 00:21:44,003 You've made your position very clear. 366 00:21:44,003 --> 00:21:46,323 You won't hear one more peep from me. Good. 367 00:21:46,323 --> 00:21:49,643 I'll turn up for the wedding, I'll get leathered, I'll 368 00:21:49,643 --> 00:21:53,043 smile for the snaps, I'll do the Oops Upside Your Head and that is 369 00:21:53,043 --> 00:21:59,483 it, but rest assured, you and little Gary will at some point need me. 370 00:21:59,483 --> 00:22:01,923 Pss... OK. And I won't be around to help. 371 00:22:04,083 --> 00:22:05,483 Know that. 372 00:22:07,483 --> 00:22:08,883 That known. 373 00:22:18,763 --> 00:22:21,523 Sorry, I thought you were going to storm out there, or do something. 374 00:22:21,523 --> 00:22:24,683 I've ordered my lunch, be rude to leave it. 375 00:22:24,683 --> 00:22:25,963 You can storm out if you want to. 376 00:22:25,963 --> 00:22:28,723 I ain't going nowhere, but know that if I wasn't also looking forward 377 00:22:28,723 --> 00:22:31,603 to this reem cuisine, or if we'd already eaten I'd have just left, so... 378 00:22:31,603 --> 00:22:34,323 Well, you'd have been leaving an empty table, because if you'd have 379 00:22:34,323 --> 00:22:37,163 said what you'd have said before ordering, I'd have left right then. 380 00:22:37,163 --> 00:22:39,603 There would never have been an empty table for me cos you 381 00:22:39,603 --> 00:22:43,763 sat down before me, so knowing what I know now I'd have told you not even taken my coat off, 382 00:22:43,763 --> 00:22:46,443 left and left you alone at the table. I'm so tired. 383 00:22:46,443 --> 00:22:47,803 You tire me out. 384 00:22:52,723 --> 00:22:54,163 Bon appetit(!) 385 00:23:11,043 --> 00:23:12,883 Here come the Kings! 386 00:23:17,083 --> 00:23:19,363 Here comes Teddy King, mate! 387 00:23:22,203 --> 00:23:25,123 Teddy King is here! Woo! Teddy King is here! 388 00:23:25,123 --> 00:23:28,203 Don't know the name, you're about to know, mate. You're about... 389 00:23:28,203 --> 00:23:31,123 How you doing, mate? Gary King. Daddy caddy to Teddy King. 390 00:23:31,123 --> 00:23:34,083 Where you been? Doing a YouTube press conference with him, mate. 391 00:23:34,083 --> 00:23:36,843 Just doing some Q&As, OK? 392 00:23:37,923 --> 00:23:42,483 Here he is, Teddy King, the jewel in the King crown! 393 00:23:42,483 --> 00:23:45,723 There we go, mate. You ready there? Get ready, good boy. 394 00:23:45,723 --> 00:23:49,563 SILENCE! Silence, please! Show some respect! 395 00:23:49,563 --> 00:23:51,483 MOUTHS 396 00:23:51,483 --> 00:23:54,883 Binos, mate, want your binos? It's a par three, Gary. It ain't 400 yards. 397 00:23:54,883 --> 00:23:57,843 OK, no to binos, fine, OK. Just asking, mate. 398 00:23:57,843 --> 00:24:00,563 Just relax, Ted, yeah? Take your time, just relax. 399 00:24:00,563 --> 00:24:04,683 Ted, message for your followers, mate. Put that away, you marrow! Say hello. 400 00:24:04,683 --> 00:24:08,083 Gary, put that away! Little quote? Put it away, Gary! 401 00:24:08,083 --> 00:24:11,523 OK, no, fine, cool. Ted, just ignore that idiot, yeah? 402 00:24:11,523 --> 00:24:14,523 That's great cos that's in the video now, mate, so well done. 403 00:24:14,523 --> 00:24:16,283 That's it, Ted. Go on, mate. 404 00:24:16,283 --> 00:24:18,203 Oh, no! 405 00:24:18,203 --> 00:24:21,843 What's that? What happened there? 406 00:24:21,843 --> 00:24:24,083 It's nerves, innit? 407 00:24:24,083 --> 00:24:26,163 Got to be nerves. Better be nerves! 408 00:24:33,923 --> 00:24:36,643 Yep, that's a wedger. 409 00:24:36,643 --> 00:24:41,803 Ah! Yeperooni, get the old wedger on that, mate. 410 00:24:41,803 --> 00:24:45,083 That's a little wedger. Get a-wedging mate. Get that wedge. 411 00:24:45,083 --> 00:24:48,043 Get ready for this! See what the boy can do, you mugs! 412 00:24:49,683 --> 00:24:51,603 SPLASH 413 00:24:53,723 --> 00:24:55,123 What?! 414 00:25:03,083 --> 00:25:08,003 Umpire! How can you expect anyone to play in this grass? 415 00:25:08,003 --> 00:25:10,283 Look at the length of it, honestly, mate! 416 00:25:10,283 --> 00:25:14,723 You could hide a stolen car in here. What's up with him? His nut's gone, innit? 417 00:25:14,723 --> 00:25:18,363 Do you want me to have a word? He's playing possum, he's playing possum. What, in golf?! 418 00:25:18,363 --> 00:25:19,643 Well, he's a maverick! 419 00:25:23,403 --> 00:25:28,203 What's going on, boy? What's happening? What's going on? Dad, I don't want to do this any more. 420 00:25:28,203 --> 00:25:31,363 You do, you love... You love your golf. You do, mate. 421 00:25:31,363 --> 00:25:35,563 Honestly, get your head together, mate, and you'll enjoy it. We love our golf, don't we? 422 00:25:35,563 --> 00:25:39,083 No, Dad, I only really play to make you and Grandad happy, and then Mrs 423 00:25:39,083 --> 00:25:42,803 Grant looked so sad when I said I wasn't going to do the spelling bee. 424 00:25:42,803 --> 00:25:47,643 Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, can't you see? That is not on you, she will get over it. 425 00:25:47,643 --> 00:25:51,643 But I like the spelling bee, Dad. The adrenaline, the apprehension, 426 00:25:51,643 --> 00:25:54,483 the furore. I don't know what any of those words mean. 427 00:25:54,483 --> 00:25:58,443 It feels like you're just using long words to show off. Long words is how I show off, Dad. 428 00:25:58,443 --> 00:26:01,283 It's what I'm good at, not golf! 429 00:26:04,763 --> 00:26:08,243 Wow! Wow-wee... 430 00:26:09,403 --> 00:26:10,843 That's told me. 431 00:26:11,843 --> 00:26:13,123 Needed to hear it, though. 432 00:26:16,243 --> 00:26:19,803 I'm sorry, mate. Honestly, I really am, and I'm proud of you 433 00:26:19,803 --> 00:26:24,763 for displaying your feelings in such a way, and I feel emotionally winded 434 00:26:24,763 --> 00:26:28,563 mate, feel like the stuffing's just been kicked out of my arse, honestly. 435 00:26:28,563 --> 00:26:31,323 P-f-f-f-f-b-b-b! 436 00:26:34,083 --> 00:26:35,963 Gee-whizz! 437 00:26:35,963 --> 00:26:39,243 You are like a little boy who's actually an old man because of the 438 00:26:39,243 --> 00:26:42,843 way you see the world and that is the thing I'm proudest of with you. 439 00:26:42,843 --> 00:26:45,003 Game over, game over! 440 00:26:45,003 --> 00:26:47,083 Official statement to follow! What?! 441 00:26:50,283 --> 00:26:55,043 He ain't playing, Dad. He ain't playing. Well, make him play. We put a lot of time and effort in here. 442 00:26:55,043 --> 00:26:59,523 I'm not going to ride him like you rode me. 443 00:26:59,523 --> 00:27:02,683 Sucking the joy and the fun out of everything what I did, 444 00:27:02,683 --> 00:27:06,963 stifling my natural ability. But you never had any natural ability. 445 00:27:08,643 --> 00:27:10,363 Come on. Let's go, mate. 446 00:27:15,723 --> 00:27:17,443 Ready, Teddy? 447 00:27:17,443 --> 00:27:22,043 OK, the first word is...pressurised. 448 00:27:22,043 --> 00:27:24,963 That's pressurised. 449 00:27:24,963 --> 00:27:26,763 Ooh, that's a tough one! 450 00:27:26,763 --> 00:27:28,683 P-R 451 00:27:28,683 --> 00:27:32,083 E-S-S-U 452 00:27:32,083 --> 00:27:35,243 R-I-S-E-D. 453 00:27:36,923 --> 00:27:39,403 That's correct. Yes! 454 00:27:39,403 --> 00:27:41,523 Well done. 455 00:27:41,523 --> 00:27:47,163 The next word is...manipulated. 456 00:27:47,163 --> 00:27:50,163 That's manipulated. 457 00:27:51,923 --> 00:27:54,603 M-A-N 458 00:27:54,603 --> 00:27:57,363 I-P-U 459 00:27:57,363 --> 00:28:02,243 L-A-T-E-D. 460 00:28:02,243 --> 00:28:08,123 Correct. Eh! Get in son! Lovely spelling. Lully spelling, mate! 461 00:28:08,123 --> 00:28:12,803 Good spelling there. Nice that wasn't it? Nice spelling, very eloquent. 462 00:28:12,803 --> 00:28:16,403 And for the win, the final word is... 463 00:28:17,923 --> 00:28:19,923 ..Ignoramus. 464 00:28:27,923 --> 00:28:30,563 That's ignoramus.