[bike being pedaled]
[wind blowing]
[clanking softly]
[dramatic music plays]
[Tuna Sandwich] Loss.
Loss is inevitable.
But that don't make it any easier to live with.
It makes our heads hurt, our hearts ache and our souls sick.
Erodious took the pain it felt from its loss
and spread suffering across the entire galaxy.
Till one man was able to heal its tortured soul.
It was a courageous sacrifice, and it cost him dearly.
Nearly cost him everything.
You find it?
I knew I didn't lose it. It was stuck in my beard!
[Tuna Sandwich] Ahem!
We have gathered here today
to honor all those who have fallen victim to Erodious.
To bury the remains of their homes
where ours once stood.
Queen Xhan survived.
But this is in honor of her home planet and her people, all of whom were lost.
[Flo] And this is in memory of the Gooman beings
known as the Hydraqueous.
May they flow together across the tides of eternity.
Bye-bye, Meep.
[sniffles]
Have fun playing with your brothers and sisters on Rainbow Bridge.
[sighs]
We do not know the names of the Fire and Ice people.
But their twin Cosmic Stones have shown us their fiery passion for life
and their icy resolve in the face of adversity.
I never met any of the invisible people.
At least, I don't think I ever met 'em…
I mean, how would you know, right?
[Carl laughs]
Uh, ahem.
But, uh… here's to them anyway.
To those of the four-armed race.
In the traditional funerary words of the departed Elongos,
"Hishteer Rengan Pamai."
What? I looked it up.
Ride on, Speedy People. Thanks for the extra pep in the step.
[sniffles]
I wish I could still absorb everyone's pain.
Today is such a sad day.
[cries]
There will be brighter days ahead. Don't need a Cosmic Ring to predict that.
Though I was mighty proud to wear mine.
Adios, PT-SB. It was an honor knowing such a fine robut.
[Papa G] Aw, heck!
So long, Gortho.
You and your Gargarian Clones sure were fine and friendly folks.
Folk? Gonna miss you, buddy.
[Kid sighs]
Bye, Master Wlkzn.
It was hard enough saying "Telekinesis," let alone using it.
But it sure was fun while it lasted.
It was fun, wasn't it?
And though it's over, you should be mighty proud of what you've done.
We all should.
Heck! We saved the Earth!
That's not something that'll soon be forgotten!
[wind gusts]
[ominous music plays]
[Papa G groans]
Again?
This is, like, the third time!
Crispin Clearly.
Chief Operating Officer of the B.C.E.I.T.A.A.
Bureau of Cosmic Events, Intergalactic Threats and Alien Affairs.
Can the person or persons known as "Kid Cosmic" please identify themselves?
Ah.
And the "Local Heroes" are?
Right.
I've been sent by the I.C.P.P.P.P.E.
International Council for Protection and Propagation of People on Planet Earth.
And on behalf of the entire world, we wish to express our deepest gratitude
for saving all of us from certain annihilation.
Thank you, Kid Cosmic and the Local Heroes, you saved the day!
[all cheer]
You're welcome! We're happy to help.
So, what's the plan?
Are we doing an international press conference?
Ticker tape parade in our honor? KC and the Local Heroes Day?
No. Such thanks will, of course, remain top secret,
and will be denied if any of you tries to reveal said thanks
or the events that we are secretly thankful for.
But people saw it, there's no way you'll stop the truth from getting out!
We don't have to.
Look, @concernedcitizen6141947R posts:
"Look at this weird thing in the sky!"
To which @conspiracy101 replies,
"Fake!"
"Exclamation mark, exclamation mark."
"CGI"? "Cell phone towers"?
"Five G network"?
"Collective chemtrail hallucination"?
See? The people will cover it up for us.
Why do you think we invented these things?
Is that all? Or have you forgotten something?
-[snaps fingers] -We'd like you to accept this check
as a token of our secret appreciation,
and in compensation for any damages you may have incurred,
physical and/or emotional, as a result of said secret unspoken events.
Ha! You think $50 can shut us up?
Oh! Apologies.
[all gasp]
Whoa! That's a lot of zeroes.
[snaps fingers]
Florence, you have to promise us one thing.
You'll invite us to the grand opening of the New Oasis.
-Sure, of cour-- -No! Wrong answer!
We should never see or speak to each other again.
Except to say, that check will self-destruct in ten seconds,
-the money's already in your account. -Ah!
Remember! Don't forget to remember
that you must forget that any of this ever happened!
[dramatic music plays]
[all yelp]
[wind gusting]
[acoustic country music plays]
[all] Wow!
[Carlos] I have to say I was a tiny bit worried
that the new place could never recapture the magic of the old place.
[chuckles]
But these seats are like riding on a cloud.
[laughs]
And the counter's so shiny.
And that new coffee maker delivers twice the kick of the old one
with none of the sludge.
Oh, I'm so glad it makes you happy.
You know what would make me happy?
If y'all would get the heck outta here!
We can have the grand opening
after the safety inspector signs off on the place this afternoon.
Until then, Jo and I still have a ton of work to do.
-[door creaks open] -Speaking of, where is she?
[rock music plays]
[Jo] "So, Queen Yan teleported our heroes to the outer reaches of outer space!"
"Don't miss our next exciting issue as Jan, Rita, Papa B, Ham Sandwich
and Cosmic Kid begin their quest for the 13 Crystals of Power
to save their new space friends from Corrodius the Planet Slayer!"
Wow, Kid, this is amazing.
How many of these have you made?
This is issue 10, but the whole story plays out in a 24-issue limited series.
Impressive.
It must make you feel good to read about our adventures.
It does.
And when the whole world reads about our adventures, I'll feel even better!
What? Kid, no!
No one can know about this, remember?
I know. That's why I changed the names… "Jan."
Ugh! Promise me you won't show these to anyone else.
I promise. I won't show them to anyone else.
Besides the five publishers I've already sent them to.
Kid, no!
[groans]
[soft metallic clinking]
[clinking continuous]
[wind blowing softly]
[chimes tinkling]
[bike being pedaled]
[paper being crumpled and tossed]
[poignant music playing]
[wind blowing]
[poignant music continues]
"Dear Sir or Madam."
"Thank you for submission."
"We are sorry to inform you…
that your comics do not meet our criteria for publication."
"Here's a sticker."
-No! -Come on, Flo! Let me in!
What did I say? We're not open!
I could use one of Hamburg's pick-me-up milkshakes now!
-No! -Why does everyone tell me "No"?
[Flo sighs]
[rock music plays]
What the--?
[acoustic country music plays]
Welcome to Mo's Oasis! Like no other place in spa--
I mean, like no other place is.
I'm Flo.
Ah. Inspector Herring of the PPG.
"PPG"?
Pacific Power and Gas.
Oh, right.
Please come in.
[door chime jingles]
Ah, of course! How could I be so stupid?
It explains everything!
Kid, everything okay?
No!
But it soon will be!
What?
What in tarnation is he up to?
[Flo] Thank you so much. That really means a lot.
That warmth you feel is the spirit of my mother
who first opened this place--
[yells]
Kid!
No!
What was that?
Kid!
Let… go… Jo!
I need to get my Ring of Power back so we can escape the Fantasy Realm!
-What? -Uh, you seem busy here,
so I'll just sign this, and approved!
Lovely place.
Let go!
Uh, sorry. Local kid. Making a weird space movie around town.
You won't get away with this, PPG!
Uh, yes, we will?
Pacific Power and Gas is fully certified, so you have nothing to worry about.
You're open for business. Congratulations!
[chuckles]
-Oh, and you might want to fix that tile. -Of course, thank you.
What are you doing?
Trying… to save… the… day!
You're not saving anything. You're ruining the grand opening!
There is no grand opening! It's a lie, like everything else!
We gotta get our Stones…
get outta here, and defeat Erodious for real-reals this time!
We did all that already! What makes you think this is all a fantasy?
[door opens]
Kid! Are you--?
-Oh… -[pickax thunks]
It's too normal and back to the way it used to be.
You're all acting like nothing ever happened!
Oh, Kid. I know you miss your heroing days.
We all do.
But just because we agreed to not talk about it, doesn't mean it didn't happen.
I didn't agree!
I didn't agree to any of this, and I can't believe you did!
[all] Congratulati-- Ooh.
Kid, I wish our story could be told.
I wish we could have become famous heroes the world over, but--
"Famous"? This isn't about me being a stupid hero!
It's about the truth! That the universe is filled with life.
Just like this diner, Earth is stuck in the middle of nowhere.
Cut off from the rest of the universe.
A universe that we know is filled with all kinds of unique beings,
who, despite their differences, are just the same as us.
They all want to be happy, safe, and not feel…
so alone.
The people of Earth need to know that.
How dare you all keep it a secret.
[door chimes jingle]
[door hinges creak]
[somber music plays]
[exhilarating music plays]
[wind blowing softly]
[paper rustling]
[wind gusts]
[electricity buzzes]
[sighs]
[electricity crackles]
What the--?
Careful this time!
Sorry.
[bike being pedaled]
He's coming.
He's coming!
-He's coming! -He's coming!
He's coming!
Everyone ready?
[Jo] Not ready!
Okay, now we're ready.
[door chimes jingle]
Is everyone okay? I saw a fire!
[confused chatter]
-[man 1] Everything's fine. -[man 2] Fine here.
Oh.
Okay.
Kid, you were right.
We are in the middle of nowhere.
How stupid of me to reopen a restaurant here!
No one's ever gonna come. I'm such a fool.
Oh, come on, Mom. We can get the word out.
Remember, "Mo's Oasis like no other place…"
[all] In space is!
And, technically, we're in space.
And we're back in business.
We just need a little self-promotion.
Billboards on the highway.
-Infranet. -TV!
-Radio! -Satellite!
[Flo] Of course! You're all right.
I mean, we need to let our customers know where we are.
So…
Hurry up! Push the button!
Track 42.
[rock music plays]
♪ Oh yeah ♪
[Tuna Sandwich] Take that, Mr. Government Man!
Mo's Oasis broadcasting live to outta space!
You mean…? What about our secret?
[all] What secret?
[all laughing]
♪ But you and me, baby We like a good time ♪
♪ With my friends, your friends And everyone else ♪
♪ So I'm pickin' up my telephone ♪
-♪ Calling everybody I know ♪ -♪ What you gonna say? ♪
♪ I said, hey, that's right! What y'all doing tonight? ♪
♪ Ready, steady, real loud Party back at my house ♪
[rock music fades out]
[wind gusting]
[crickets chirping]
[sighs]
[gasps and mutters]
-[engine roars] -[both scream]
[glass shatters]
[loud tinkling]
[engine powering down]
Flo! Are you a sight for sore eyes!
You guys really are in the middle of nowhere.
Luckily, your signal beacon's coming in strong and steady.
[door chime jingles]
Glad to hear it. Welcome to the grand opening.
Carl, Carla, Carlos!
[all] Carlax!
-[Flo] What can we get you? -Some volgott pie sounds amazing.
Volgott might be a little hard to come by. Maybe try apple?
♪ Honey, just bring yourself ♪
♪ Well, I'm pickin' up my telephone ♪
♪ Callin' everybody I know ♪
♪ What you gonna say? ♪
♪ I said, hey, that's right What y'all doing tonight? ♪
♪ Ready, steady, real loud Party back at my house ♪
♪ We're expecting a crowd ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Make it real loud ♪
♪ Yeah! ♪
♪ I'm picking up my telephone ♪
-♪ Calling everybody I know ♪ -♪ What you gonna say? ♪
♪ I said, hey, that's right What y'all doing tonight? ♪
♪ Ready, steady, real loud Party back at my house ♪
♪ I'm picking up my telephone ♪
-[indistinct chatter] -Excuse me. Hello.
Everyone. Can I--?
Attention, please!
[thunder crashes]
Um, I-I just want to take a moment and thank you all for coming,
and for putting this place, and this planet…
[all laugh]
…back on the map.
[all cheer]
[Kid] All right!
[Flo] And I especially want to thank Kid…
whose far-fetched faith in what seemed a fantasy,
brought us all together in the first place.
To Kid.
Kid Cosmic.
[all] To Kid Cosmic!
[all cheer]
Yeah!
-Heck, yeah! -Yes!
[rock music plays]
[Tuna Sandwich] Hot damn.
Whoo!
[rock music plays]
♪ Check ♪
♪ Hanging out in a desert town ♪
♪ Said, "Oh, where everybody gone?" ♪
♪ Something on the television… ♪
[helicopter propellers beating]
♪ I do the best that I can ♪