1 00:00:14,827 --> 00:00:18,956 Captain's log, stardate 57436.2. 2 00:00:19,039 --> 00:00:21,792 The Cerritos is docked at Douglas Station 3 00:00:21,876 --> 00:00:24,837 for routine maintenance and resupply. 4 00:00:24,920 --> 00:00:26,922 We will soon set course for the capital planet 5 00:00:27,006 --> 00:00:28,841 on the Galar system, where we're scheduled 6 00:00:28,924 --> 00:00:32,470 to make second contact with the Galardonian high council. 7 00:00:32,553 --> 00:00:34,138 First contact is a delicate, 8 00:00:34,221 --> 00:00:36,307 high-stakes operation of diplomacy. 9 00:00:36,390 --> 00:00:39,477 One must be ready for anything when humanity is interacting 10 00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:42,605 with an alien race for the first time. 11 00:00:42,688 --> 00:00:44,690 But we don't do that. 12 00:00:44,774 --> 00:00:46,692 Our specialty is second contact. 13 00:00:46,776 --> 00:00:47,776 Still pretty important. 14 00:00:47,818 --> 00:00:49,195 We get all the paperwork signed, 15 00:00:49,278 --> 00:00:51,047 make sure we're spelling the name of the planet right, 16 00:00:51,071 --> 00:00:52,656 get to know all the good places to eat. 17 00:00:54,575 --> 00:00:56,035 Oh, my God. What are you doing? 18 00:00:56,118 --> 00:00:57,721 - Uh, nothing, nothing, nothing. I'm just... - Oh, no. 19 00:00:57,745 --> 00:00:59,497 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. 20 00:00:59,580 --> 00:01:01,180 Are you pretending to do a captain's log? 21 00:01:01,248 --> 00:01:03,000 We're all supposed to keep logs. 22 00:01:03,083 --> 00:01:04,877 - Okay, let me listen to it. - No. Go away. 23 00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:06,271 - Leave me alone. No. No. - Ah! I can't believe 24 00:01:06,295 --> 00:01:07,855 you're wasting your shore leave on this. 25 00:01:07,880 --> 00:01:09,024 - Privacy, please. - Aah! Hey, time to go. 26 00:01:09,048 --> 00:01:10,358 - Come on. Get out of your little closet. - Privacy. 27 00:01:10,382 --> 00:01:11,884 Let's go. Come on. 28 00:01:11,967 --> 00:01:12,967 Are you drunk? 29 00:01:13,010 --> 00:01:14,237 Yeah, dude, you should be, too. 30 00:01:14,261 --> 00:01:15,679 I mean, this station is amazing. 31 00:01:15,763 --> 00:01:17,181 And they have Romulan whiskey. 32 00:01:17,264 --> 00:01:18,909 And I bet you thought it was going to be green, 33 00:01:18,933 --> 00:01:20,619 but it is actually blue. It's this very beautiful color. 34 00:01:20,643 --> 00:01:22,120 Romulan whiskey is against regulation. 35 00:01:22,144 --> 00:01:23,687 Yeah, 'cause it's awesome. 36 00:01:23,771 --> 00:01:25,207 Aw, man, they got all sorts of great stuff. 37 00:01:25,231 --> 00:01:26,816 Oh! Oh! Come on, check this out. 38 00:01:26,899 --> 00:01:28,251 - Oh, yeah. - Ah! Be careful with that! 39 00:01:28,275 --> 00:01:29,819 Pretty sweet, right? 40 00:01:29,902 --> 00:01:31,379 Yeah, it's a Klingon bat, um, bat, uh, bat... 41 00:01:31,403 --> 00:01:33,381 I don't know. I'm not a scientist. It doesn't matter. 42 00:01:33,405 --> 00:01:35,217 - Shut up. I got it from an old guy with an eye patch. - Hey, hey. 43 00:01:35,241 --> 00:01:37,576 Come spar with me. Come on! Oh, we can be Klingons. 44 00:01:37,660 --> 00:01:39,387 We can have crimped hair, wrinkled foreheads. 45 00:01:39,411 --> 00:01:40,722 - Worf, Worf, Worf. - It's got crusty blood on it! 46 00:01:40,746 --> 00:01:43,874 - I love honor! I demand honor! - Hey, stop. Stop! 47 00:03:09,209 --> 00:03:11,295 Wow. 48 00:03:11,378 --> 00:03:13,172 Wow. 49 00:03:16,383 --> 00:03:17,801 Here we go. 50 00:03:17,885 --> 00:03:20,012 Ensign D'Vana Tendi, reporting for duty. 51 00:03:20,095 --> 00:03:21,639 I'm a transfer from Outpost 79. 52 00:03:21,722 --> 00:03:23,265 Deck Four. Follow the yellow line. 53 00:03:23,349 --> 00:03:24,701 Take the turbolift all the way down. 54 00:03:24,725 --> 00:03:26,101 Thank you so much. 55 00:03:26,185 --> 00:03:27,704 And can I just say that I'm really honored to be... 56 00:03:27,728 --> 00:03:28,938 Keep it moving, lower decks. 57 00:03:29,021 --> 00:03:30,230 Next! 58 00:03:31,899 --> 00:03:33,317 Banana, hot. 59 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:34,318 Banana, hot. 60 00:03:34,401 --> 00:03:36,111 Aah! Frickin' burned me. 61 00:03:36,195 --> 00:03:38,280 Uh, i-is there an Ensign Boimler here? 62 00:03:38,364 --> 00:03:39,364 Banana, hot. 63 00:03:40,407 --> 00:03:41,825 Hi. Here, that's me. Ahoy. 64 00:03:41,909 --> 00:03:42,826 Ensign Tendi reporting for duty. 65 00:03:42,910 --> 00:03:44,328 You're my orientation liaison. 66 00:03:44,411 --> 00:03:46,914 Yes, welcome. Brad Boimler, Ensign, command division. 67 00:03:46,997 --> 00:03:48,290 Ah! Oh, my gosh. 68 00:03:48,374 --> 00:03:49,935 I've never worked with commanders before. 69 00:03:49,959 --> 00:03:51,168 I'm in sciences. 70 00:03:51,251 --> 00:03:53,128 I love science. Uh, it's so sciency. 71 00:03:53,212 --> 00:03:55,023 I mean, that blue goes green with your great... 72 00:03:55,047 --> 00:03:56,066 - I mean, great, with your... oh, my gosh. - Yo-yo, what up? 73 00:03:56,090 --> 00:03:58,384 Beckett Mariner, also an ensign, command division, 74 00:03:58,467 --> 00:04:00,678 but not quite as impressed with myself 75 00:04:00,761 --> 00:04:02,680 as this little rascal over here. 76 00:04:02,763 --> 00:04:04,324 Yeah, we're not actual commanders, by the way, 77 00:04:04,348 --> 00:04:06,141 we're more like commanders-in-training. 78 00:04:06,225 --> 00:04:08,065 I can't believe we're gonna serve side by side, 79 00:04:08,102 --> 00:04:10,354 scientists and commanders, an elite team. 80 00:04:10,437 --> 00:04:11,623 Yeah, no, we're not really elite. 81 00:04:11,647 --> 00:04:14,316 We're more like the cool, scrappy underdogs of the ship. 82 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:15,985 You know, we don't wash our hands, 83 00:04:16,068 --> 00:04:17,420 we're doing kickflips all the time. 84 00:04:17,444 --> 00:04:19,196 But with focus and dedication, 85 00:04:19,279 --> 00:04:22,366 you could be chief medical officer someday. 86 00:04:22,449 --> 00:04:23,867 Oh, senior officers are overrated. 87 00:04:23,951 --> 00:04:25,095 They're always, like, stressed out 88 00:04:25,119 --> 00:04:26,704 and just yelling about directives. 89 00:04:26,787 --> 00:04:28,707 It is better down here, where the real action is. 90 00:04:28,789 --> 00:04:30,433 You really don't care about moving up in rank? 91 00:04:30,457 --> 00:04:32,334 Been there, definitely over it. 92 00:04:32,418 --> 00:04:34,837 Whenever you think for yourself, they knock you back down. 93 00:04:34,920 --> 00:04:36,439 You know, for someone who claims to hate rank, 94 00:04:36,463 --> 00:04:38,090 you certainly bring it up a lot. 95 00:04:38,173 --> 00:04:39,883 Yes, I'm very complicated, thank you. 96 00:04:39,967 --> 00:04:42,845 - Ooh, you want the tour? - O-Of the-the ship? Uh, yes! 97 00:04:42,928 --> 00:04:44,114 You don't like giving the tour. 98 00:04:44,138 --> 00:04:46,015 True, but I do... 99 00:04:46,098 --> 00:04:47,409 ...have a big box of shore leave contraband 100 00:04:47,433 --> 00:04:49,018 I need help with. 101 00:04:49,101 --> 00:04:51,520 The senior officers are all up here, 102 00:04:51,603 --> 00:04:53,856 then you've got Engineering, science stations. 103 00:04:53,939 --> 00:04:57,067 All sorts of ops around here... 104 00:04:57,151 --> 00:04:59,737 Ops, ops, ops, storage, ops. 105 00:04:59,820 --> 00:05:01,739 Actually, there's like a ton of ops. 106 00:05:01,822 --> 00:05:04,366 It's like, guys, I think we have ops covered. 107 00:05:04,450 --> 00:05:06,428 - And we're here? - Well, no. We're actually way down here. 108 00:05:06,452 --> 00:05:07,911 What this map doesn't show you 109 00:05:07,995 --> 00:05:10,289 is that everything from, like, this deck up, 110 00:05:10,372 --> 00:05:11,749 super lame, not important to us. 111 00:05:11,832 --> 00:05:12,750 - You like the bar. - All right, fine. 112 00:05:12,833 --> 00:05:14,918 - Everything except the bar. - And the bridge. 113 00:05:15,002 --> 00:05:16,104 - The bridge is not cool. - Yes, it is. 114 00:05:16,128 --> 00:05:17,379 Oh, hey, that's Rutherford. 115 00:05:17,463 --> 00:05:18,756 Rutherford, what's up? 116 00:05:21,175 --> 00:05:22,986 Yo, yo, yo, slow down. Is your thingy acting up? 117 00:05:23,010 --> 00:05:24,487 Rutherford's an engineer, oh, and, as of a couple weeks ago, 118 00:05:24,511 --> 00:05:26,055 cybernetically enhanced. 119 00:05:26,138 --> 00:05:28,432 Ooh, I've never met a recent cyborg. 120 00:05:28,515 --> 00:05:30,768 Hey, nice to meet you. Welcome to the crew. 121 00:05:30,851 --> 00:05:32,954 Wait, don't you have a date with Ensign Barnes tonight? 122 00:05:32,978 --> 00:05:35,272 - Sure do. - She's crazy hot. Are you nervous? 123 00:05:35,355 --> 00:05:38,442 Trying to be, but this thing keeps tamping it down. 124 00:05:38,525 --> 00:05:40,235 Yikes. Okay, you got it. 125 00:05:40,319 --> 00:05:42,404 Uh-oh, I'm nervous. What if I say something stupid? 126 00:05:42,488 --> 00:05:44,248 What if she doesn't like the way that I look? 127 00:05:44,323 --> 00:05:46,909 Ah, I can only look one way. I can't change it by tonight! 128 00:05:46,992 --> 00:05:48,494 - Better? - Yeah, thanks. 129 00:05:48,577 --> 00:05:50,430 What if she hates my jokes? I don't know any jokes. 130 00:05:50,454 --> 00:05:51,830 Oh, I'm gonna puke. 131 00:05:51,914 --> 00:05:53,123 What else? 132 00:05:53,207 --> 00:05:54,392 That's a room of switches and dials 133 00:05:54,416 --> 00:05:55,334 you'll never need to go into. 134 00:05:55,417 --> 00:05:57,187 It's actually a pretty important processing hub. 135 00:05:57,211 --> 00:05:59,588 Nobody knows what that room is. 136 00:05:59,671 --> 00:06:01,271 It's a pattern-buffer maintenance access. 137 00:06:01,340 --> 00:06:02,484 She knows that. She's being funny. 138 00:06:02,508 --> 00:06:04,510 Ah, and this is Boimler's hidey closet, 139 00:06:04,593 --> 00:06:06,595 where he pretends to be a captain like a big boy. 140 00:06:06,678 --> 00:06:08,013 This is not a good tour! 141 00:06:09,598 --> 00:06:11,158 So, yeah, we kind of sleep in a hallway. 142 00:06:11,183 --> 00:06:12,935 It's a little disappointing, 143 00:06:13,018 --> 00:06:15,205 but eventually, when you rank up, you get your own room. 144 00:06:15,229 --> 00:06:17,149 We're pretty close to the showers, which is nice. 145 00:06:17,231 --> 00:06:19,149 Does get kind of musty, though. 146 00:06:19,233 --> 00:06:21,610 Which is weird 'cause the showers are sonic. 147 00:06:21,693 --> 00:06:24,404 Whoa. Whoa. 148 00:06:25,572 --> 00:06:27,491 It's... perfect. 149 00:06:27,574 --> 00:06:29,552 Well, once you get settled, you should probably check in 150 00:06:29,576 --> 00:06:31,161 with Nurse Westlake in Medical. 151 00:06:31,245 --> 00:06:32,430 You'll be assisting him with some basic... 152 00:06:32,454 --> 00:06:34,123 Ooh, let's go check out the holodeck. 153 00:06:34,206 --> 00:06:36,017 - She doesn't have time for that. - How do you know? 154 00:06:36,041 --> 00:06:37,126 Because I'm her liaison. 155 00:06:37,209 --> 00:06:38,228 Oh, yeah, then what time is it? 156 00:06:38,252 --> 00:06:41,004 And don't check, because if she doesn't have time, 157 00:06:41,088 --> 00:06:42,881 then you should know what time it is. 158 00:06:42,965 --> 00:06:45,175 Otherwise, you're just trying to sound important. 159 00:06:45,259 --> 00:06:47,469 So, what time is it? 160 00:06:47,553 --> 00:06:48,846 Welcome to the holodeck. 161 00:06:48,929 --> 00:06:50,305 Easily the best part of the ship. 162 00:06:50,389 --> 00:06:52,182 The warp core is the best part of the ship, 163 00:06:52,266 --> 00:06:53,100 uh, followed by the bridge, 164 00:06:53,183 --> 00:06:55,060 the photon torpedo tubes, cetacean ops... 165 00:06:55,144 --> 00:06:56,913 Dude, the warp core is just a big glowing tube. 166 00:06:56,937 --> 00:06:59,022 I love the warp core. The warp core rules. 167 00:06:59,106 --> 00:07:00,315 No, it doesn't. 168 00:07:00,399 --> 00:07:02,317 Computer, find us a beach in Hawaii. 169 00:07:03,443 --> 00:07:04,528 What is this? 170 00:07:04,611 --> 00:07:07,406 This stuff is crazy. What does it do? 171 00:07:07,489 --> 00:07:09,217 Oh, it just gets everywhere and gives you a rash. 172 00:07:09,241 --> 00:07:10,409 You get a rash from sand? 173 00:07:10,492 --> 00:07:12,035 - What, you don't? - No. Nobody does. 174 00:07:12,119 --> 00:07:13,912 Oh, God, I always do. 175 00:07:13,996 --> 00:07:15,539 Go ahead, take her for a spin. 176 00:07:15,622 --> 00:07:18,667 Computer, can you put us in the Adashake Center on Orion? 177 00:07:20,252 --> 00:07:23,172 Wow, I never made time to go before I enlisted. 178 00:07:23,255 --> 00:07:26,258 Pretty cool, right? You can go almost anywhere you can imagine. 179 00:07:26,341 --> 00:07:28,278 - Come on, Boimler. Give it a whirl. - I-I don't know. 180 00:07:28,302 --> 00:07:30,554 Come on, there has to be somewhere you'd love to be. 181 00:07:30,637 --> 00:07:33,557 Um... Computer, show us the warp core. 182 00:07:34,641 --> 00:07:36,518 Wow! Amazing. 183 00:07:36,602 --> 00:07:38,896 What an impressive feat of engineering. 184 00:07:38,979 --> 00:07:41,064 You really bum me out sometimes. 185 00:07:41,148 --> 00:07:42,500 Ensign Boimler, report to the bridge. 186 00:07:42,524 --> 00:07:44,318 You work on the bridge? 187 00:07:44,401 --> 00:07:45,444 Yeah. That's right. 188 00:07:45,527 --> 00:07:48,071 Because they appreciate people who follow the rules. 189 00:07:48,155 --> 00:07:49,406 Who's boring now? 190 00:07:49,489 --> 00:07:50,699 On my way. 191 00:07:50,782 --> 00:07:52,576 Wow, does he get to go up there a lot? 192 00:07:52,659 --> 00:07:54,912 Nah, just whenever someone spills a drink or something. 193 00:07:54,995 --> 00:07:56,580 Computer, load Mariner program 194 00:07:56,663 --> 00:07:58,415 "all-nude Olympic training facility." 195 00:07:58,498 --> 00:08:00,250 You might want to back up a bit. 196 00:08:02,294 --> 00:08:05,255 Wow, this is a very detailed program. 197 00:08:14,473 --> 00:08:15,933 Farewell, Commander. 198 00:08:16,016 --> 00:08:17,619 Thanks again for your hospitality, Chancellor. 199 00:08:17,643 --> 00:08:20,395 We'll be sending construction teams down to help with the... 200 00:08:20,479 --> 00:08:22,231 to help with the subspace comm array 201 00:08:22,314 --> 00:08:24,066 as soon as we load up the supplies. 202 00:08:24,149 --> 00:08:26,610 Ransom to Cerritos. Five to beam up. 203 00:08:31,740 --> 00:08:33,408 Should you get that looked at, sir? 204 00:08:33,492 --> 00:08:35,118 Eh, I'll be fine. 205 00:08:35,202 --> 00:08:37,412 - Want to grab a drink tonight? - You know it. 206 00:08:37,496 --> 00:08:40,582 Nothing like a cold beer after a smooth second contact. 207 00:08:40,666 --> 00:08:42,125 Now, that's what I'm talking about. 208 00:08:42,209 --> 00:08:44,670 Oh, yeah. 209 00:08:46,755 --> 00:08:49,424 Bridge. 210 00:08:56,181 --> 00:08:57,975 Ensign. 211 00:08:58,058 --> 00:09:00,269 Sorry, what? 212 00:09:00,352 --> 00:09:03,146 I said why aren't you at your post, Ensign? 213 00:09:03,230 --> 00:09:04,982 Ransom, report. 214 00:09:05,065 --> 00:09:06,984 Coordination with the Galardonian high council 215 00:09:07,067 --> 00:09:08,485 is ahead of schedule, Captain. 216 00:09:08,569 --> 00:09:09,653 Excellent. Keep me posted. 217 00:09:09,736 --> 00:09:11,780 Ensign, you're with me. 218 00:09:15,242 --> 00:09:16,242 Brad Boimler. 219 00:09:16,285 --> 00:09:19,997 Born Modesto, California, commissioned in '79. 220 00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:22,499 Not a single demerit. You keep a personal log? 221 00:09:22,583 --> 00:09:24,793 - Sometimes five a day. - That's excessive. 222 00:09:24,876 --> 00:09:26,670 Do you see a captain's chair in your future? 223 00:09:26,753 --> 00:09:29,172 - I hope so, ma'am. - Well, I see a lot of potential 224 00:09:29,256 --> 00:09:32,676 in you, son, which is why I'm giving you a special assignment. 225 00:09:32,759 --> 00:09:35,304 Really? I mean, of course, yes, whatever you need. 226 00:09:35,387 --> 00:09:37,014 Keep an eye on Ensign Mariner. 227 00:09:37,097 --> 00:09:40,183 If she breaks protocol, I want a full report. 228 00:09:40,267 --> 00:09:42,728 Sorry, ma'am, is something wrong? 229 00:09:42,811 --> 00:09:45,480 I like my crew working in lockstep. 230 00:09:45,564 --> 00:09:47,649 There isn't any wiggle room on the Cerritos. 231 00:09:47,733 --> 00:09:50,652 Not when lives are at stake. Do you disagree? 232 00:09:50,736 --> 00:09:53,071 - No, ma'am. - Good. Dismissed. 233 00:09:53,155 --> 00:09:57,075 Ensign, let's keep this between us, shall we? 234 00:09:59,328 --> 00:10:00,662 What? Oh, man, 235 00:10:00,746 --> 00:10:02,706 I would kill to work on the deflector dish. 236 00:10:02,789 --> 00:10:05,167 Most of my day is spent repairing food replicators. 237 00:10:05,250 --> 00:10:07,437 - They really break that often? - Only when you get food in 'em. 238 00:10:07,461 --> 00:10:08,604 Ah, at least you don't have to be around 239 00:10:08,628 --> 00:10:09,546 Lieutenant Commander Billups. 240 00:10:09,629 --> 00:10:10,839 Knowing how to talk to women 241 00:10:10,922 --> 00:10:13,175 is kind of that guy's final frontier. 242 00:10:14,509 --> 00:10:16,511 - That is illogical! - Oh! S-Sorry. 243 00:10:16,595 --> 00:10:17,429 I-Is he a friend of yours? 244 00:10:17,512 --> 00:10:19,681 No, no, no, no... it's this Vulcan implant. 245 00:10:19,765 --> 00:10:21,743 It keeps on randomly suppressing my emotional reactions. 246 00:10:21,767 --> 00:10:23,518 Sorry if this is making it weird. 247 00:10:23,602 --> 00:10:25,437 I'm just not used to being a cyborg yet. 248 00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:27,773 Actually, my dad was a cyborg. 249 00:10:29,816 --> 00:10:31,443 Shaxs drop his latte again? 250 00:10:31,526 --> 00:10:33,570 - Guy's got baby hands. - No. 251 00:10:33,653 --> 00:10:35,573 "Computer, send me a suck-up to clean up my mess. 252 00:10:35,655 --> 00:10:37,574 I have a giant torso and little hands. Over." 253 00:10:37,657 --> 00:10:40,535 - Right? - Yeah, hilarious. 254 00:10:42,454 --> 00:10:45,290 All right, people, you know the plan. 255 00:10:45,374 --> 00:10:49,795 Let's get this array set up so the, uh, "Galardonians" 256 00:10:49,878 --> 00:10:52,297 can communicate with the rest of the Federation. 257 00:10:55,884 --> 00:10:58,220 Oh, man, this is really nice. 258 00:10:58,303 --> 00:11:00,423 I'm glad we got to sit down and get to know each other 259 00:11:00,472 --> 00:11:01,556 without any interruptions. 260 00:11:19,199 --> 00:11:21,410 Set phasers to stun! 261 00:11:23,703 --> 00:11:25,664 So, where are you quartered? 262 00:11:25,747 --> 00:11:28,750 Deck Nine, by the squash courts. 263 00:11:28,834 --> 00:11:30,836 Someone brought a virus back from the planet. 264 00:11:30,919 --> 00:11:34,714 This is happening all over the ship. 265 00:11:34,798 --> 00:11:36,800 I've never played squash. Is it fun? 266 00:11:36,883 --> 00:11:38,760 We should play sometime. 267 00:11:43,932 --> 00:11:45,600 Oh, yeah, it's all gonna be over subspace. 268 00:11:45,684 --> 00:11:47,686 You're gonna love it. 269 00:11:55,569 --> 00:11:56,611 Unbelievable. 270 00:12:02,409 --> 00:12:04,327 Hey, you. Green girl! 271 00:12:04,411 --> 00:12:05,638 Strap patients down as they come in. 272 00:12:05,662 --> 00:12:07,765 Double them up if you have to. They aren't going to infect 273 00:12:07,789 --> 00:12:10,459 - each other twice. - But, uh, uh, 274 00:12:10,542 --> 00:12:12,711 I was actually supposed to be assisting Nurse Westlake. 275 00:12:12,794 --> 00:12:14,838 That is Nurse Westlake. 276 00:12:16,923 --> 00:12:19,843 Wow, it's such an honor to meet you, sir. 277 00:12:19,926 --> 00:12:22,679 I'm looking forward to working with you. 278 00:12:27,976 --> 00:12:29,519 Aha! 279 00:12:29,603 --> 00:12:30,955 Boimler! Ugh, don't jump out at people. 280 00:12:30,979 --> 00:12:33,356 For real, man. You're lucky I didn't phaser you. 281 00:12:33,440 --> 00:12:35,525 You're selling Federation weapons to these guys, 282 00:12:35,609 --> 00:12:36,776 - aren't you? - Yo, calm down. 283 00:12:36,860 --> 00:12:38,320 No! 284 00:12:38,403 --> 00:12:40,655 I'm sick of you pushing me around! 285 00:12:40,739 --> 00:12:43,492 Explain yourself right here! 286 00:12:43,575 --> 00:12:45,052 Boims, you need to shut up. Listen to me. 287 00:12:45,076 --> 00:12:46,495 You know nothing. Shut your mouth. 288 00:12:46,578 --> 00:12:48,205 Uh, we're just gonna take off. 289 00:12:48,288 --> 00:12:50,499 Nobody move! 290 00:12:50,582 --> 00:12:52,876 Selling Starfleet technology without the express consent 291 00:12:52,959 --> 00:12:55,545 of the Federation Council is a breach of regulations 292 00:12:55,629 --> 00:12:57,005 498 and 756 of... 293 00:12:57,088 --> 00:12:59,633 And regulations 25, 15, 348. 294 00:12:59,716 --> 00:13:01,927 You're breaking 76 just for pointing that phaser at me. 295 00:13:02,010 --> 00:13:03,678 Fine, you know more regulations than me. 296 00:13:03,762 --> 00:13:04,846 I still have to stop you. 297 00:13:04,930 --> 00:13:06,723 It's farm equipment, you idiot. 298 00:13:06,806 --> 00:13:08,683 - They're farmers. - I'm not an idiot. 299 00:13:08,767 --> 00:13:10,727 You expect me to believe that...? 300 00:13:10,810 --> 00:13:12,771 Shovel and hoe? 301 00:13:20,946 --> 00:13:22,614 Run, idiot! 302 00:13:30,497 --> 00:13:31,748 What's it doing? 303 00:13:31,831 --> 00:13:33,708 It's shooting butt-webbing at a tree. 304 00:13:33,792 --> 00:13:35,043 I-It looks pretty pissed. 305 00:13:35,126 --> 00:13:36,044 Well, I hope you're happy. 306 00:13:36,127 --> 00:13:37,879 You left your post. 307 00:13:37,963 --> 00:13:40,590 Oh, I am so sorry I made sure that some humble farmers, 308 00:13:40,674 --> 00:13:42,759 who can't afford to wait for Starfleet bureaucracy 309 00:13:42,842 --> 00:13:44,946 to notice them, got some help so they didn't have to starve. 310 00:13:44,970 --> 00:13:46,763 How did you even know these guys exist? 311 00:13:51,726 --> 00:13:54,771 Because I was here for first contact last year on the Quito, 312 00:13:54,854 --> 00:13:57,649 before I got my ass demoted and transferred to the Cerritos. 313 00:13:57,732 --> 00:13:59,776 Well, I didn't know that. 314 00:13:59,859 --> 00:14:02,779 I have served on five ships, man. I have seen stuff. 315 00:14:02,862 --> 00:14:04,799 One time, I got trapped in a sentient cave for weeks. 316 00:14:04,823 --> 00:14:06,825 You ever been trapped in a sentient cave? 317 00:14:06,908 --> 00:14:08,952 That's a dark place that knows things. 318 00:14:09,035 --> 00:14:11,621 I almost got my head taken off by a singing crystal. 319 00:14:11,705 --> 00:14:13,849 I've been in a Klingon prison where I had to fight a yeti 320 00:14:13,873 --> 00:14:15,750 for my own shoes for no reason. 321 00:14:15,834 --> 00:14:17,419 He was just being a dick. 322 00:14:17,502 --> 00:14:18,646 You've been on, what, four planets? 323 00:14:18,670 --> 00:14:20,755 Five, if you include Vulcan. 324 00:14:20,839 --> 00:14:21,857 Of course I don't include stupid Vulcan. 325 00:14:21,881 --> 00:14:23,001 You may as well count Earth. 326 00:14:23,049 --> 00:14:24,884 I was counting Earth. 327 00:14:24,968 --> 00:14:27,971 You don't know anything except what's in your manuals. 328 00:14:28,054 --> 00:14:29,824 Since you can't think for yourself, how about you 329 00:14:29,848 --> 00:14:31,534 follow my lead, and maybe we'll get out of this alive? 330 00:14:31,558 --> 00:14:33,977 Ensign Boimler to Cerritos. Two for emergency trans... 331 00:14:36,438 --> 00:14:37,606 Are you insane? 332 00:14:37,689 --> 00:14:40,108 We can't just beam out of here. These guys need that animal. 333 00:14:40,191 --> 00:14:42,819 - Even if it eats us? - General Order 5. 334 00:14:42,902 --> 00:14:44,529 Fine, okay. How about we stun it? 335 00:14:44,613 --> 00:14:46,733 - We'll just stun it. - No. That could spoil the milk. 336 00:14:46,781 --> 00:14:48,509 - Spoil what milk? - These guys probably milk it. 337 00:14:48,533 --> 00:14:49,826 - Oh, like you even know. - Ooh. 338 00:14:49,909 --> 00:14:51,870 - Take off your pants. - Mariner. 339 00:14:53,121 --> 00:14:54,998 Five ships. 340 00:14:55,081 --> 00:14:56,708 Yeti shoes. I am always right. 341 00:14:56,791 --> 00:14:58,543 Take them off now. 342 00:15:04,424 --> 00:15:06,009 Yes, it's working. 343 00:15:06,092 --> 00:15:08,637 Man, look at that thing just tear into that dummy. 344 00:15:08,720 --> 00:15:10,138 Okay, here we go, get ready to jump. 345 00:15:10,221 --> 00:15:11,449 Wait, why isn't it attacking your uniform? 346 00:15:11,473 --> 00:15:13,642 It's going to town on mine. 347 00:15:13,725 --> 00:15:15,685 - Random chance? Who cares? On my mark. - I care. 348 00:15:15,769 --> 00:15:17,854 I say we wait for it to destroy both of our uniforms. 349 00:15:17,937 --> 00:15:19,147 Mark! 350 00:15:20,106 --> 00:15:21,650 Jump, Boimler! 351 00:15:21,733 --> 00:15:23,085 Come on, it's safe. It can't reach back this far. 352 00:15:23,109 --> 00:15:24,653 Man. 353 00:15:24,736 --> 00:15:25,987 Oh! 354 00:15:26,071 --> 00:15:27,989 Phaser it! Phaser it! Phaser it! 355 00:15:28,073 --> 00:15:30,408 Please don't phaser her. It'll spoil the milk. 356 00:15:30,492 --> 00:15:31,993 Did you hear that? 357 00:15:32,077 --> 00:15:34,162 - Uh, I can't let it eat him. - She's an herbivore. 358 00:15:34,245 --> 00:15:36,665 She's just gumming on him to suckle out some moisture. 359 00:15:36,748 --> 00:15:39,042 Oh, okay. Hey, Brad. Good news, buddy. 360 00:15:39,125 --> 00:15:41,961 So, I've ju... it's just suckling you, I've just learned. 361 00:15:42,045 --> 00:15:43,672 - You're fine. - Help! 362 00:15:43,755 --> 00:15:45,483 Hang in there, you got this. It is getting tired. 363 00:15:45,507 --> 00:15:47,550 So go to your happy place, like, ooh, 364 00:15:47,634 --> 00:15:49,135 think about the warp core. 365 00:15:50,762 --> 00:15:52,122 You, uh, want a snack or something? 366 00:15:52,180 --> 00:15:54,391 Yeah, you got any of that milk? 367 00:15:54,474 --> 00:15:56,452 All uninfected crew meet at Transporter Room Eight. 368 00:15:56,476 --> 00:15:58,561 We have to get to the rally point. 369 00:15:58,645 --> 00:16:01,189 I guess we better go for a walk. 370 00:16:04,275 --> 00:16:06,462 There's a maintenance hatch on the other side of the saucer 371 00:16:06,486 --> 00:16:08,780 that should give us access to Deck Eight. 372 00:16:08,863 --> 00:16:10,198 What kind of music are you into? 373 00:16:10,281 --> 00:16:11,801 We have just enough oxygen to get there, 374 00:16:11,825 --> 00:16:13,410 but we're cutting it close. 375 00:16:13,493 --> 00:16:16,037 I really like this classical band called The Monkees. 376 00:16:16,121 --> 00:16:17,414 Ever heard of 'em? 377 00:16:17,497 --> 00:16:18,777 Let's just say "I'm a Believer." 378 00:16:49,821 --> 00:16:52,615 Mmm. Wow. I wasn't expecting that. 379 00:16:52,699 --> 00:16:53,950 What did you expect? 380 00:16:54,033 --> 00:16:55,219 Well, for these maintenance hatch doors 381 00:16:55,243 --> 00:16:56,619 to recognize our combadges. 382 00:16:56,703 --> 00:16:59,748 Oh, no, I mean what just happened? 383 00:16:59,831 --> 00:17:02,125 I'm more worried about what didn't just happen. 384 00:17:02,208 --> 00:17:04,085 Failure analysis estimates the reliability 385 00:17:04,169 --> 00:17:07,130 of this mechanism at one out of 4.69 repeating. 386 00:17:07,213 --> 00:17:09,591 Oh, are you seeing this? 387 00:17:11,551 --> 00:17:13,136 The anesthetic is useless. 388 00:17:13,219 --> 00:17:15,197 We have to work through the pain. Your hands clean? 389 00:17:15,221 --> 00:17:17,640 - Uh... - Pump this. Don't pass out. 390 00:17:17,724 --> 00:17:19,893 Nobody's authorized to pass out! 391 00:17:19,976 --> 00:17:22,145 That's my heart! It hurts when you pump it! 392 00:17:22,228 --> 00:17:23,605 - Oh, God! Oh... - Sorry. 393 00:17:23,688 --> 00:17:26,649 - Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. - Oh, God. Oh! 394 00:17:34,032 --> 00:17:37,285 Okay, there we go, man, yeah. 395 00:17:37,368 --> 00:17:39,287 See? I told you it'd be okay. 396 00:17:39,370 --> 00:17:41,498 My bones. 397 00:17:41,581 --> 00:17:42,850 You'll be fine. Doc'll wave a light over it. 398 00:17:42,874 --> 00:17:44,000 We got to get back to camp. 399 00:17:44,083 --> 00:17:45,186 You took way too long with that thing. 400 00:17:45,210 --> 00:17:48,838 But I'm naked. 401 00:17:51,257 --> 00:17:53,718 At least we got to help those guys. 402 00:17:53,802 --> 00:17:55,522 I think we make a pretty good team, Boimler. 403 00:17:55,595 --> 00:17:58,014 You may as well know, I've been monitoring you. 404 00:17:58,097 --> 00:17:59,325 I'm supposed to report any breach of conduct 405 00:17:59,349 --> 00:18:00,809 to the captain. 406 00:18:00,892 --> 00:18:02,519 We've been serving together for a year, 407 00:18:02,602 --> 00:18:04,288 and I still don't get why you worship those guys. 408 00:18:04,312 --> 00:18:05,313 They're heroes. 409 00:18:05,396 --> 00:18:06,556 All they care about is glory. 410 00:18:06,606 --> 00:18:08,983 Stuff that could earn them a mention in the history books. 411 00:18:09,067 --> 00:18:09,943 They don't really care about us. 412 00:18:10,026 --> 00:18:12,028 No way, no. The captain tries her hardest 413 00:18:12,111 --> 00:18:14,215 to support all of us, she just doesn't always have time to... 414 00:18:14,239 --> 00:18:15,257 Look, I don't have to defend her. 415 00:18:15,281 --> 00:18:17,081 You're not gonna talk me out of reporting you. 416 00:18:24,833 --> 00:18:27,001 Whoa! What the hell? 417 00:18:27,085 --> 00:18:29,879 Keep the doors secure. The crew depends on us. 418 00:18:29,963 --> 00:18:32,173 We can't let them down. 419 00:18:33,758 --> 00:18:34,819 Captain, I'm sure you're wondering 420 00:18:34,843 --> 00:18:36,779 - where my uniform is. - Shaxs, what are my options? 421 00:18:36,803 --> 00:18:38,930 I recommend we detonate the entire warp core, Captain. 422 00:18:39,013 --> 00:18:39,931 What? No. 423 00:18:40,014 --> 00:18:41,891 We need to get this man to sickbay immediately. 424 00:18:41,975 --> 00:18:43,685 He is very important. 425 00:18:43,768 --> 00:18:44,853 What makes him so special? 426 00:18:44,936 --> 00:18:45,936 Nothing. He's worthless. 427 00:18:45,979 --> 00:18:47,689 It's the slime, Captain. 428 00:18:47,772 --> 00:18:50,608 He's covered in slime that could save us all. 429 00:18:50,692 --> 00:18:53,361 Everyone, protect this slime. 430 00:19:14,299 --> 00:19:16,050 Holy. 431 00:19:16,134 --> 00:19:19,262 This substance completely neutralizes the rage effect. 432 00:19:19,345 --> 00:19:20,698 It came from this spider cow thing. 433 00:19:20,722 --> 00:19:21,949 I-I could tell you all about it. 434 00:19:21,973 --> 00:19:24,225 But can you synthesize a cure, Doctor? 435 00:19:24,309 --> 00:19:26,728 Hmm. I better. You don't have much time. 436 00:19:26,811 --> 00:19:28,330 Ooh, should've washed those hands, Captain. 437 00:19:28,354 --> 00:19:29,772 Stow it, Mariner. 438 00:19:31,316 --> 00:19:33,234 Ah, ah, ah... 439 00:19:33,318 --> 00:19:35,612 Oh, what happened? Where am I? 440 00:19:35,695 --> 00:19:37,906 And did I eat flesh? 441 00:19:37,989 --> 00:19:40,325 - Uh, hardly any. - How much did I eat?! 442 00:19:49,334 --> 00:19:51,753 - It's working! - Looks like you'll get to publish 443 00:19:51,836 --> 00:19:53,296 more award-winning research, Doc. 444 00:19:53,379 --> 00:19:56,174 Great, more paperwork. 445 00:19:56,257 --> 00:19:57,926 How much did I eat? 446 00:19:58,009 --> 00:19:59,695 Uh, this guy saved your asses. Ensign Brad Boimler. 447 00:19:59,719 --> 00:20:01,220 Put that in the paperwork. 448 00:20:03,056 --> 00:20:05,141 Still, uh, happy to be here? 449 00:20:05,224 --> 00:20:08,937 Are you kidding? I got to hold a heart! 450 00:20:11,272 --> 00:20:13,942 Once again, solely thanks to the brilliant efforts 451 00:20:14,025 --> 00:20:15,318 of Dr. T'Ana, 452 00:20:15,401 --> 00:20:16,945 the crew is saved. 453 00:20:17,028 --> 00:20:19,322 Undetected by the first contact team, 454 00:20:19,405 --> 00:20:22,784 the alien virus is exactly the type of eventuality 455 00:20:22,867 --> 00:20:25,328 that can make a second contact mission 456 00:20:25,411 --> 00:20:27,455 a life-or-death situation. 457 00:20:27,538 --> 00:20:30,458 Luckily, my senior staff are always up for a challenge. 458 00:20:30,541 --> 00:20:32,669 End recording. 459 00:20:32,752 --> 00:20:33,670 Sorry about that, Ensign Bumford. 460 00:20:33,753 --> 00:20:34,671 What do you have to report? 461 00:20:34,754 --> 00:20:36,798 - Boimler. - Pardon? 462 00:20:36,881 --> 00:20:37,924 It's Boimler, not Bumford. 463 00:20:38,007 --> 00:20:40,802 Wha-What about Mariner? Did she follow protocol? 464 00:20:40,885 --> 00:20:42,720 Yeah, I think so. We spent the whole day 465 00:20:42,804 --> 00:20:44,681 just adjusting the subspace comm array. 466 00:20:44,764 --> 00:20:46,683 This says you came back covered in bite marks, 467 00:20:46,766 --> 00:20:47,976 wearing an alien frock. 468 00:20:48,059 --> 00:20:49,852 What, she had nothing to do with that? 469 00:20:49,936 --> 00:20:52,021 You know, I don't remember much. 470 00:20:52,105 --> 00:20:54,357 Maybe that goo that saved the ship 471 00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:55,858 messed with my memory. 472 00:20:55,942 --> 00:20:57,485 Nothing insubordinate? 473 00:20:57,568 --> 00:20:59,195 - Not that I saw. - Unbelievable. 474 00:20:59,278 --> 00:21:02,073 Thank you, Ensign Boimler. 475 00:21:02,156 --> 00:21:04,325 Dismissed. 476 00:21:06,077 --> 00:21:08,162 Everything all right, Captain Freeman? 477 00:21:08,246 --> 00:21:10,498 I heard you had some sort of rage virus? 478 00:21:10,581 --> 00:21:12,333 Ransom tried to eat a guy. We're fine. 479 00:21:12,417 --> 00:21:13,876 Listen, I've had enough. 480 00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:15,128 I'm throwing her in the brig. 481 00:21:15,211 --> 00:21:17,091 We already tried that. You know it doesn't work. 482 00:21:17,130 --> 00:21:19,048 - She loves the brig. - She undermines me 483 00:21:19,132 --> 00:21:22,051 - in front of the crew! - I'm sure nobody notices. 484 00:21:22,135 --> 00:21:24,512 - Yeah, they do. - Sweetheart, just... 485 00:21:24,595 --> 00:21:26,240 Don't you "sweetheart" me. We agreed, if she 486 00:21:26,264 --> 00:21:28,117 didn't fit in here, you'd send her back to the Quito. 487 00:21:28,141 --> 00:21:29,767 Well, she doesn't fit in! 488 00:21:29,851 --> 00:21:31,894 I got to go. Admiral stuff. Love you. 489 00:21:31,978 --> 00:21:33,938 Don't you hang up on me! She's your daughter, too! 490 00:21:33,980 --> 00:21:35,124 - Hanging up now. - Don't you dare. 491 00:21:35,148 --> 00:21:36,024 - Finger's on the button. - Don't you... don't you... 492 00:21:36,107 --> 00:21:37,775 - Uh, I-I'm losing you. - I said don't... 493 00:21:37,859 --> 00:21:40,361 Oh, no. Did the rage virus ruin your date? 494 00:21:40,445 --> 00:21:42,363 Nah, that stuff happens all the time. 495 00:21:42,447 --> 00:21:44,866 Oh, good. So, was she as great as everyone says? 496 00:21:44,949 --> 00:21:46,409 Yeah. She was smart and pretty 497 00:21:46,492 --> 00:21:49,370 and, ooh, highly effective in a ship-wide crisis. 498 00:21:49,454 --> 00:21:51,122 So, tell me, are you guys a thing? 499 00:21:51,205 --> 00:21:53,374 - Yeah, I'm not seeing her again. - Well, you survived 500 00:21:53,458 --> 00:21:54,977 an epic life-threatening situation together. 501 00:21:55,001 --> 00:21:56,919 - Don't you share a bond? - Oh, for sure. 502 00:21:57,003 --> 00:21:59,255 But she had zero interest in figuring out why a red alert 503 00:21:59,338 --> 00:22:01,466 overrode Maintenance Hatch 70's access protocols. 504 00:22:01,549 --> 00:22:03,468 It's, like, can you even imagine? 505 00:22:03,551 --> 00:22:05,386 I-I'm sorry. What? 506 00:22:05,470 --> 00:22:08,056 - It did?! - Yes. I mean, who has time for romance 507 00:22:08,139 --> 00:22:09,766 when there's a level two diagnostic 508 00:22:09,849 --> 00:22:11,392 just sitting there waiting to be run? 509 00:22:11,476 --> 00:22:13,061 Mm-mm. Don't have to tell me twice. 510 00:22:13,144 --> 00:22:14,562 I am right there. 511 00:22:14,645 --> 00:22:16,773 - Mariner. - Boimler. 512 00:22:16,856 --> 00:22:18,775 I wanted to thank you. 513 00:22:18,858 --> 00:22:20,276 It felt good helping those people. 514 00:22:20,359 --> 00:22:21,778 I mean, you might be... 515 00:22:21,861 --> 00:22:23,446 Mm, better than you in every single way? 516 00:22:23,529 --> 00:22:25,948 Unorthodox, but... I can't believe I'm saying it... 517 00:22:26,032 --> 00:22:28,159 Starfleet is better with you in it. 518 00:22:28,242 --> 00:22:30,119 Wait, so you didn't tattle on me? 519 00:22:30,203 --> 00:22:31,245 I did not. 520 00:22:31,329 --> 00:22:33,456 Boimler! Wha...? No way, man! 521 00:22:33,539 --> 00:22:35,249 I had you pegged wrong. 522 00:22:35,333 --> 00:22:37,460 Yeah, I thought you were, like, a boring worker drone. 523 00:22:37,543 --> 00:22:39,462 And you are, but inside that drone is 524 00:22:39,545 --> 00:22:42,006 an ambitious little weasel, and inside that weasel 525 00:22:42,090 --> 00:22:44,258 might be a tiny human being. 526 00:22:44,342 --> 00:22:45,802 That's, uh, sort of unfair. 527 00:22:45,885 --> 00:22:47,565 This is a moment, man. Ooh, this is a mood. 528 00:22:47,595 --> 00:22:49,472 Okay? And I do not care how long it takes, 529 00:22:49,555 --> 00:22:51,492 we're going to get your butt in a captain's chair. 530 00:22:51,516 --> 00:22:53,118 - This isn't a big deal. - Mm, guess what. 531 00:22:53,142 --> 00:22:54,182 I'm your new mentor. Boom. 532 00:22:54,227 --> 00:22:55,603 Surprise, bitch, it's done. 533 00:22:55,686 --> 00:22:57,897 - How does it feel? - No, you can't just decide. 534 00:22:57,980 --> 00:22:59,666 - Whoa. She's your mentor? - No, she's not. - Come on, guys! Lower decks! 535 00:22:59,690 --> 00:23:01,335 - Lower decks! Lower decks! - Congrats, man. 536 00:23:01,359 --> 00:23:03,027 - That's cool. - Teamwork! Spirit! 537 00:23:03,111 --> 00:23:05,113 Community! Lower decks! Lower decks! 538 00:23:05,196 --> 00:23:07,115 Lower decks! You're gonna be my cha'Dich 539 00:23:07,198 --> 00:23:09,009 - from now on, baby! - I don't want lessons from you. 540 00:23:09,033 --> 00:23:10,052 Okay, Klingons? They're all about fighting. 541 00:23:10,076 --> 00:23:11,261 They're always making oaths about everything. 542 00:23:11,285 --> 00:23:12,203 Everyone knows that. 543 00:23:12,286 --> 00:23:13,371 Do you know about Spock? 544 00:23:13,454 --> 00:23:14,831 Dude came back... from being dead! 545 00:23:14,914 --> 00:23:16,225 Yeah, I think I've heard of Spock. 546 00:23:16,249 --> 00:23:17,559 He got frickin' Genesis-deviced and fought Khan 547 00:23:17,583 --> 00:23:19,019 - and some space whales! - Can we just go back 548 00:23:19,043 --> 00:23:20,354 - to not being friends? - How about Sulu? 549 00:23:20,378 --> 00:23:22,130 Ooh, he rocked a sword. That was his thing. 550 00:23:22,213 --> 00:23:24,191 That could be your thing, too! We're due for a new sword guy! 551 00:23:24,215 --> 00:23:25,567 What can I do to make this stop, please? 552 00:23:25,591 --> 00:23:27,969 - Mm, do you know Kirk? My man Worf? - Yes. Yes! 553 00:23:28,052 --> 00:23:29,905 - Gary Mitchell? - I'm sure I could look him up. 554 00:23:29,929 --> 00:23:31,323 You don't have to, because you have a mentor! 555 00:23:31,347 --> 00:23:33,391 - No. Don't touch me. - Do you know Deanna Troi? 556 00:23:33,474 --> 00:23:35,601 Her body be bangin'! She went from a jumpsuit... 557 00:25:12,740 --> 00:25:15,993 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 558 00:26:04,250 --> 00:26:05,251 Chirp.