ANNOUNCER: Welcome to Just Roll With It!
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
Roll, roll, roll!
[BELL RINGS]
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
Woo!
-Yeah! Woo! -Yeah!
-Woo! -Woo!
Yeah!
Welcome to Just Roll With It!
-Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! -Yes.
-A show that gives-- -Wait, wait, wait. Hold on.
Ramon, why are you wearing all that?
Just preparing for, ya know, what happens when we hear this sound...
[HORN BLOWS]
That's right. When you hear that, you guys vote, and he might need those.
[AUDIENCE CHEERS]
And whatever happens, we'll have to...
ALL: Just Roll With It!
Oh! Welcome to Spirit Week, kids!
Or, as I like to call it, teachers' Mardi Gras!
Woo! Woo-hoo!
Wow, everyone's really excited about the big basketball game this week.
Yeah, why do you seem so bummed? You're actually on the team.
Hardly. I never get to play.
All coach lets me do is wave a towel around to get the crowd hyped.
I think I'm getting bench-butt.
That's what happens when you skip a grade.
Now you're on the big boy basketball team, and you're just an itty-bitty,
little baby, mini popcorn shrimpy kid.
Maybe next year I'll hit a growth spurt and be as good as Big Jim.
Ha! Yeah, right.
Everyone in this two-bit town thinks Big Jim Miller is gonna
go pro when he graduates, and I'm gonna cash in on it.
Check it out. We made bootleg Big Jim merch to sell.
We got Big Jim mugs, Big Jim water bottles,
we even got Big Jim gym shorts in sizes small to extra big.
So, you're telling me you got extra big, Big Jim gym shorts?
Yep. Top of the line, luxury items, spared no expense.
They look like they were made in five minutes with an iron.
And is that my shirt?
And it could be again for the low, low price of twenty-five dollars.
Blair, how are you expecting people to pay for this garbage?
[NEWS THEME MUSIC PLAYS ON TV]
BOY: Hey, Frank Morris Middle.
It's Spirit Week, so beep, beep, get out the way as Big Jim is sure
to pulverize King James Middle this Friday.
Boom-wacka-wacka-wacka.
This has been your news flash with Norvin Schnuckle.
Whoa, I have never seen Norvin that riled up.
Bingo! Right there.
That's how I get people to pay for this garbage.
People do whatever the TV tells them to.
I get on there, hijack the minds of the masses,
and brainwash them to be my cash pigs.
[WHISTLE BLOWING & CHEERING]
Gather 'round, children! It's Big Jim!
Hey, Big Jim, tell everyone what you're gonna do this Friday?
Big Jim's gonna win!
Go, Sharks!
Okay, back to lunch, everyone.
Oh, Owen, just the little shrimp I wanted to see!
So, you know how good Big Jim is at basketball?
-Yeah. -Well, that's how bad he is at school.
It's true, bro.
I'm what medical professionals refer to as an oaf.
So, I'm going to need you to help tutor him for the big math test on Thursday.
Yeah, sure, us teammates gotta look out for each other.
[IN UNISON] You're on the team?
I recognize you now. The hype man!
Great, it's settled!
Just make sure he passes the test, or else he won't be able to play,
and the entire school will hate you.
But have fun!
Hey, Blair, I heard you signed up for the school announcements. Exciting stuff!
I love that you're gonna follow in our footsteps
and get into the world of broadcasting. You know, we could give you a few tips.
[HORN BLOWS]
No! No!
ANNOUNCER: Time for you to vote. Who should we bring into the scene?
Please be nice and I'll give you a hug.
So, Rachel, we'll be re-starting the scene with a new line
that you have to read off of a card.
ANNOUNCER: Votes are in. Now back to the scene.
MAN: Let's roll, please.
DIRECTOR: Action!
"I love that you're gonna follow in our footsteps
and get into the world of broadcasting. You know, we could give you a few tips.
Like how having good interviewing skills is the most important
thing when you're on air.
So today you're going to interview a beloved local legend, Jeff the Clown!"
[AUDIENCE CHEERS]
Oh!
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Let's just see what this guy is all about.
Whoa!
-Oh, my goodness. BYRON: What's up, Jeff?
-Hey, how are ya? How ya doin'? -Fantastic!
Who's this bozo?
"So, a lot of my friends think clowns are scary, and so do I.
-How does that make you feel?" -I hate it.
The fact is, I'm a highly educated clown.
I graduated from the Harvard of Clown Schools.
"Then why do you guys wear that scary make-up?
And, what's up with your hair?"
Clowning is serious business!
[AUDIENCE GASPS]
You know, I'm getting sick of this interview.
BLAIR: Just one more question.
"How do you feel about being upstaged by Choo-Choo the Great?
I hear she's now the hottest clown in town."
Oh, dear!
Choo-Choo!
You got a lot of nerve, being a low-budget clown without a degree.
[HONKS]
Oh! Yah!
Oh my goodness!
-Oh! AUDIENCE: Oh!
Oh that was expensive!
Blair, give her the dessert!
Oh, whoa, whoa, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! Go for it!
-Oh, yeah, yeah. -Are you kidding
-Oh! -Yeah!
Oh!
Woo!
[CHEERING]
That was helpful, huh?
I've got more tips if you want.
Well, guess there is one other thing you can teach me.
What's the best way to get suckers to buy garbage?
Well, honey, the best way to sell something is to prey
on the human ego and fear.
You want the customer to feel that if they don't own your product,
their lives won't be as good as everyone else's.
So your sales pitch should tap into the primal emotions of urgency,
jealousy and greed.
Or you could just make a catchy jingle sung by like a dancing cat or something.
-Right? -I understood that one. Dancing cat.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Hey, Owen.
Is that Big Jim Miller, the hometown hero, in my house?
Oh!
You're my favorite Frank Morris Middle School basketball player.
-Dad! -What? He is!
I'm on that team!
Right, right. He's my favorite on the court.
You're my favorite that does the whippy towel thing.
And, my dad was just leaving.
-Right, Pop? -Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right about, now.
Now that the paparazzi's gone, let's get started.
The test is gonna be on positive and negative fractions.
Cool, cool. Excited to dive in.
First question, what are fractions?
Ha-ha-ha. You're kidding.
He said, what are...
Oh, you're not kidding.
Can Big Jim be honest?
Big Jim's not good at math. There's no way I'ma pass this test.
And when I don't, half this town's gonna riot, the other half is gonna be excited,
and the third half probably won't care because they don't follow basketball.
Wow, you're really not good at fractions.
But don't worry, that's why you're here.
Big Jim was thinking of a plan.
Now this is complicated, so listen close.
On the day of the big test,
-I'll cheat off you. -That's your plan?
Look, dude, Big Jim's gotta play.
If Big Jim doesn't play, our school loses, and there's gonna be scouts at the game.
If Big Jim isn't there, that means no college hoops for Big Jim,
and then no pro ball.
Owen, us teammates gotta look out for each other.
The whole school is counting on us.
The whole school?
[CHEERING]
Owen, over here!
You been thinking about what we talked about?
Ya know, the cheating?
Jim, I want to be a team player, but I don't think it's r--
Whoa, bro, you don't have any fish sticks.
Hey, Luna! Could my friend here get some fish sticks?
-He's an important member of the team. -Oh!
So give him some that haven't fallen on the floor.
Some floor-less fish sticks, coming right up!
Floor-less fish sticks? I feel like a fancy princess!
That's nothing.
Hey, Library Lady.
Hey, Big Jim! I can't wait for the game on Friday.
Do you think my best pal, Owen, could get the library to himself
this week as a personal favor to me?
As you wish, my liege.
The whole library?
Yeah, you could read everything and there'll be no other kids
around to make fun of you.
Wow!
Wait, do kids make fun of me?
Not anymore, bro, your life's about to change.
I'll also get you an open shot in the game.
-I'm talking buzzer beater. -Are you serious?
Life can always be this good if you help me out.
So, what do you say?
I say, could you make my buzzer beater a lay-up?
So you can see why I'm so torn.
On the one hand, our entire educational system rests on the foundation
of students being honest and if we disregard that, our whole
society could collapse.
But on the other hand, clean fish sticks!
Did you know they're not supposed to be gritty?
Owen, the entire school is counting on you to make sure Big Jim passes.
And more importantly, I'm counting on you because if Big
Jim doesn't play then I can't sell my luxury garbage.
Now get out of my light.
[NEWS THEME MUSIC PLAYS]
Hey, Frank Morris Middle! B-squared, here.
A bombshell study came out this week that said all the coolest kids
in school are wearing Big Jim merchandise to the big game.
But where do you get it? Well, I'm glad you asked.
From now until Friday, these babies are available at locker 318.
Now here's Ruth with our jingle.
♪ We hope our team is gonna win! ♪
♪ Get your Big Jim merch if you wanna fit in! ♪
♪ Locker 318, if you know what I mean! ♪
♪ Meow! Meow! Meow! ♪
Okay, verse number two.
-♪ Jim was born down in Columbus and-- ♪ -Okay Ruth, that's enough.
Thank you.
Anyway, clubs are meeting, and other school things are happening, too.
This has been B-squared, and that's what's real.
[NEWS THEME MUSIC PLAYS]
[DOORBELL RINGS]
'Sup, bro. Why'd you text me and say you need me to come over?
Do you need to go over the cheating plan again?
No, I think I got it. You sit behind me and copy my answers.
Big Jim, I'm just gonna come out and say it.
-I'm not gonna cheat for you. -What?
Here's why your plan's not gonna work. I'm a big ol' snitch.
In fact, I'm snitching to you that I am a snitch.
That's how big of a snitch I am.
All I'm trying to say is, you have so much going for you,
don't throw it away because of some cheating scandal.
Here, take a look at this.
Ever hear of Regular-Sized Rani? He was the star kicker at--
[HORN BLOWS]
[AUDIENCE CHEERS]
Woo!
ANNOUNCER: Okay, audience, you see your choices one, two or three.
You guys vote on what you want to have happen next.
-My nerves are out the roof right now. DIRECTOR: All right so, Owen.
The scene will restart with a new line we have written in a book.
-You should read that new line. -I'm ready.
ANNOUNCER: Okay, that's it. Votes are in. Let's go back to the scene.
DIRECTOR: Action!
OWEN: Here, take a look at this.
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
All right, "I wanted to convince you of the dangers of cheating,
and there's nothing more convincing than a young man in a three-piece suit."
I mean, look at it. Look at it.
That's nice, right? Yeah.
"Especially if that young man decides to sing you a song about not cheating.
Which is what I'm going to do right now."
Woo!
♪ Oh! ♪
♪ Ooh-hoo! ♪
♪ Woo! ♪
♪ Sometimes in your life, you don't gotta cheat ♪
This is a song for Big Jim.
♪Big Jim! ♪
♪ You know! Goo-- ♪
Oh, my choir, thank you, guys.
♪ -Don't cheat -Yes! ♪
♪ Big Jim! ♪
♪ Oh, you don't gotta cheat ♪
♪ Ooh-hoo! ♪
♪-Don't cheat -Oh ♪
♪ Oh! Big Jim, you don't got to ♪
♪ Cheat! ♪
♪ -Don't cheat -Big Jim ♪
♪ -I know it's hard -Don't cheat ♪
♪ -When you are looked at as an oaf -Don't cheat ♪
♪ But it's okay because someday you'll go pro ♪
♪ You're gonna go pro! You're gonna go pro! ♪
♪ -You're gonna go... go pro! -Don't cheat ♪
♪ Oh, Big Jim ♪
♪ I won't help you cheat to improve your score! ♪
♪ Don't cheat ♪
♪ Even if I have to eat fish sticks from off the floor ♪
♪ Don't cheat ♪
♪ Oh, Big Jim, it's okay ♪
♪ Take my hand And you'll be okay ♪
Sing us out. Sing us out.
♪ Oh, you shouldn't cheat ♪
♪ -You shouldn't cheat! -It won't go well ♪
♪ -Oh ho! -And if you do, Owen will tell ♪
♪ -I'm gonna tell! -Owen will tell! ♪
♪ -I'm a big ol' snitch! -Owen will tell! ♪
♪ -Owen will tell! -I'm a big ol' snitch! She-- ♪
♪ Owen will tell. Owen will tell. Owen will tell. ♪
♪ Owen will tell. Owen will tell. Owen will tell. Owen will tell. ♪
Can we give it up for the choir, baby?
Thank you! Thank you!
Hoo!
See you guys on the tour bus!
We're taking this on the road!
So, you don't think Big Jim should cheat?
-No. -You really believe Big Jim can pass?
I know Big Jim can pass.
All right, I'll take the test on my own.
Now, let's learn about history.
It's math, but I love your enthusiasm. Let's hit these books!
[CHEERING]
♪ Just roll with it! ♪
I can't believe you guys are almost sold out of this junk.
Yeah, it's great how impressionable people are.
TV should really be illegal.
[SOBS]
All is lost, children!
All is lost!
I just ran Big Jim's test through the grade machine, and he failed!
He can't play in the big game. Disperse, students.
Head for the hills! Go find other schools to enroll in.
And you!
You're the one that did this to us.
He was supposed to make Big Jim smart!
ALL: Boo, Owen! Boo, Owen! Boo, Owen! Boo, Owen!
I know my angry mobs. This could be real bad for my brother.
-Come with me. ALL: Boo, Owen! Boo, Owen!
I'm sorry! I swear, Big Jim was doing pretty good last night.
Owen, I'm a furious ball of rage.
Prepare to taste my wrath.
Look everyone, the TV just came on!
B-squared here, with a breaking news bulletin.
We're all dealing with the aftermath of...
The failing of Big Jim Miller.
I'm proud to announce an exclusive interview with the flunky
of the hour himself, Big Jim Miller.
Big Jim, give it to me straight, what happened?
Thing is, all the questions they asked was stuff that I didn't know.
And I believe you even worked with a tutor on this.
Yeah. Owen.
[ALL GROWL]
And your failing wasn't his fault, was it?
-No, and nobody should be mad at him. ALL: Huh?
In fact, Owen was the first tutor Big Jim had who actually cared about Big
Jim as a person, and not just some jock who can help the school win.
And even though Big Jim only got three questions right,
Big Jim got those three questions right on his own.
So there you have it.
Big Jim can't play, but it was not because of his shrimpy yet well intending tutor,
Owen Blatt.
And what better way to commemorate this historic day
than by buying your very own
"I Was There When Big Jim Failed" t-shirts.
Pre-order with Ruth in the cafeteria.
I still can't believe it! I got in the big game!
Hey, maybe if more of the good players fail stuff, you'll get to start someday.
Thanks, I guess.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Big Jim! Yeah.
The team really needed you earlier. I mean really, really needed you.
I mean, the kids lost bad. It was brutal.
So brutal, the coach said, "whatever" and let Owen play.
-Did you see him out there? -I ran down the court, twice!
A whole sixteen seconds of action.
I almost got it on video, but by the time I got the phone out of my purse,
they'd already sent him back to the bench.
Owen, Big Jim wanted to say thanks.
[HORN BLOWS]
Woo!
ANNOUNCER: Okay, audience what should Big Jim give Owen?
This episode has been the best episode of my life.
I think Big Jim is gonna give him a present and that present is messy!
ALL: Just roll with it! ANNOUNCER: And let's go back to the scene.
DIRECTOR: Action!
Owen, Big Jim wanted to say thanks.
So Big Jim got you a milkshake slide!
What?
Oh my...!
-It's huge! Oh my gosh! BYRON: Yeah!
RACHEL: Oh, that's big! BLAIR: Oh, it's big!
-Big Jim, can I go first? BIG JIM: Yes, go ahead.
RACHEL: Oh! Oh!
Oh!
AUDIENCE: Headfirst! Headfirst! Headfirst!
-Here we go! Here we go! -Woo!
[BYRON YELLS]
Oh!
[YELLS]
BIG JIM: Rachel!
ALL: Rachel! Rachel!
RACHEL: Oh!
You alright, baby?
This my wife! This my wife!
BIG JIM: Owen! Owen!
-Owen! Owen! -Oh!
ALL: Blair! Blair! Blair! Blair!
Blair! Blair! Whoa!
-Come over here. AUDIENCE: Big Jim! Big Jim!
BYRON: You all right. Come over here. -Big Jim! Big Jim!
ALL: Big Jim! -Me?
ALL: Big Jim! -Let's go!
OWEN: Big Jim!
Whoa!
And that's our show!
You guys have been a great crowd!
-Woo! BYRON: Yeah!
♪ Roll with it! ♪
♪ Just roll with it! Just roll with it! ♪
♪ Just roll with it! Roll with it! ♪
♪ Just roll with it! Just roll with it! ♪
♪ Just roll with it! Roll with it! ♪