1 00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:27,520 This is fucking sabotage, this is. This has got McDonaghs all over it. 2 00:00:27,640 --> 00:00:29,560 It's not the McDonaghs. 3 00:00:29,720 --> 00:00:32,760 It was an electrical surge. Tommo took a direct feed off that thing. 4 00:00:32,920 --> 00:00:35,680 And it was blowing a gale last night. It's fried everything. 5 00:00:35,705 --> 00:00:38,719 Fuck's sake. That's all that fucking gear gone up in smoke now. 6 00:00:38,720 --> 00:00:41,000 Prices. Prices are gonna rise. 7 00:00:41,025 --> 00:00:44,145 I'm telling you, the McDonaghs are gonna be laughing their tits off. 8 00:00:44,440 --> 00:00:46,360 - Hey! - Jesus Christ. What? 9 00:00:46,520 --> 00:00:49,880 - What do you reckon then? - It's a surge from that storm last night. 10 00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:51,600 Never mind that. 11 00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:54,296 What about them buggers. They were down wind at the time. 12 00:00:54,321 --> 00:00:55,324 What about them? 13 00:00:55,420 --> 00:00:57,340 They're fucking stoned. 14 00:00:57,400 --> 00:00:59,615 They need milking. I can't get them to shift. 15 00:00:59,640 --> 00:01:01,400 The milk's all tainted. 16 00:01:01,560 --> 00:01:03,440 I can't sell that to the supermarkets and 17 00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:06,120 have the public getting mashed over their cornflakes. 18 00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:09,040 They're not stoned, you dipshit. You're imagining things. 19 00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:12,760 It's scientifically improbable. The smoke would go off into the ether. 20 00:01:12,960 --> 00:01:16,680 There, look. They're stoned off their tits. Look, they're fucking giggling. 21 00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:20,320 They're fucking cows, Jimbo. That's how cows always look. 22 00:01:20,440 --> 00:01:22,735 - It's not funny. - It fucking is. 23 00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:26,040 They're as stoned as bastards. I mean, come on lads. What am I supposed to do? 24 00:01:26,065 --> 00:01:28,905 I'll tell you what you need to do now. Honestly, this is exactly 25 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:32,600 what you need to do. You go to the 24 hour and get us some Jaffa Cakes. 26 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:35,080 - Or a Dairy Milk. - Get him a Dairy Milk. 27 00:01:35,240 --> 00:01:38,880 Me to you, to me, to you. Fucking Chuckle Brothers are back with us. 28 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:40,920 Watch out, lad. 29 00:02:12,280 --> 00:02:16,335 Now, ladies and gentlemen, let's have a big round of applause 30 00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:20,440 for our principal ballerina of the Bolshoi, 31 00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:22,480 Cardi! 32 00:02:27,345 --> 00:02:29,840 Tinsley Blanchett's hypnotist shows were legendary. 33 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:32,000 I mean, not just for the entertainment value. 34 00:02:32,120 --> 00:02:34,040 He had them queuing out the door 35 00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:37,680 just to have a go, hoping for the chance to forget themselves. 36 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:41,360 You know, all the worries, all the bollocks, just for 15 minutes 37 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:45,120 to become something else. I mean, Christ, who could blame him? 38 00:02:45,240 --> 00:02:47,720 Now, all right. OK. 39 00:02:47,840 --> 00:02:49,760 Now, you're like the bubble 40 00:02:49,880 --> 00:02:52,720 floating up from the ocean floor. 41 00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,840 That's it. Rise to the surface. 42 00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:59,240 Three, two, one. 43 00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:01,280 You're back in the room. 44 00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:08,360 It is my honour 45 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:12,040 to introduce to you here tonight 46 00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:14,440 the lord of the dance himself, 47 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:17,960 Mr Michael Flatley. 48 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:50,920 Hey, Albie. 49 00:03:52,760 --> 00:03:54,720 Albie? 50 00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:00,480 Hey, Albie. You did not see me there. 51 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:02,520 - Oh, sorry. Hi. - Hi. 52 00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:06,280 Who are they for? You haven't started smoking, have ya? 53 00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:09,480 No. They're for me uncle. No. They're for me auntie. 54 00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:12,520 Got to go. See you. 55 00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:14,560 Right. See ya. 56 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:16,600 Hi. 57 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:22,440 - Police. Get your fucking hands up. - Fucking hell. 58 00:04:22,600 --> 00:04:26,120 Don't sneak up on me, dickhead. For one, I know jujitsu. 59 00:04:26,280 --> 00:04:29,160 - Come on, give us a line. - I can't do that, Dylan. 60 00:04:29,280 --> 00:04:31,640 What? You got loads. Don't be tight. 61 00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:34,960 It's not a question of being tight, sunshine. I swore an oath. 62 00:04:35,120 --> 00:04:38,760 What? An oath? What's this, The Lord of the Fucking Rings? 63 00:04:38,920 --> 00:04:42,340 Weren't just me neither. We all swore it. The lads, Erin, Kath, Ringo and Babs. 64 00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:48,320 Swear to God, Mavis's Irish dancing. It's getting better every year. 65 00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:51,282 Shit, dude, you haven't given him any of that? 66 00:04:51,307 --> 00:04:52,404 He knows man, about us. 67 00:04:52,440 --> 00:04:54,440 What is this about a fucking oath? 68 00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:58,200 For God's sake. Look, I wanna go down on record, I specifically said 69 00:04:58,360 --> 00:05:00,640 not to call it an oath. That's bloody Frodo's idea. 70 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:03,560 - I said to call it a pact. - Hell, what pact? What's the idea? 71 00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:07,720 I'll tell you what the big idea is, it's... Fuck you, Dylan. 72 00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:11,880 It's simple. After the debacle that went down at Ringo and Babsy's wedding, 73 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:16,200 we all decided, never to give you Class A's ever again for as long as we shall live. 74 00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:20,280 They make you morose and pathologically inclined to ruin everyone's night. 75 00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:21,595 That's just bollocks. 76 00:05:21,620 --> 00:05:24,424 Everyone's off their nut, having a great time 77 00:05:24,560 --> 00:05:27,120 and you just become this paranoid harbinger of doom. 78 00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:29,200 No. That's... That's exaggeration. 79 00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:32,320 It's not you. You can't deal... You can't help yourself, man. 80 00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:34,560 You do a line or you do a pill 81 00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:37,920 and you start spouting shit like, you know... 82 00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:39,960 - "I can't feel my heart." - Exactly. 83 00:05:40,160 --> 00:05:42,595 Or "I'm 24 times more likely of having a bloody" 84 00:05:42,620 --> 00:05:45,104 heart attack off cocaine." You know what I mean? 85 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:48,400 Statistically, you ruin everyone's buzz, man. 86 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:51,280 You're a buzz ruiner. Yeah, you ruin drugs for people. 87 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:53,600 - This's horse shit. - Is it? - Absolutely horse shit. 88 00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:57,560 Remember that bloody wedding, you convinced everybody that the E's were poisoned. 89 00:05:57,760 --> 00:06:01,840 They tasted strange. They tasted like fuckin', what was it, roll-on deodorant. 90 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:04,520 Think about it. How would you know what that tastes like? 91 00:06:04,680 --> 00:06:07,048 - You wouldn't know. - Couldn't possibly know. 92 00:06:07,073 --> 00:06:08,704 I know, I know. I'm sorry. 93 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:11,280 Oh, for God's sake. 94 00:06:13,080 --> 00:06:15,040 Yes! 95 00:06:16,400 --> 00:06:18,800 I hardly ever take it these days, to be honest. 96 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:20,840 It's really bad for you. 97 00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:24,400 Oh, get us some nuts. 98 00:06:24,560 --> 00:06:27,120 Something like 94% of them have, like, blood on them. 99 00:06:27,280 --> 00:06:30,920 Yeah, teeming with hepatitis, apparently. Just FYI. 100 00:06:31,040 --> 00:06:34,560 Oh, my God. Help me. 101 00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:38,640 Get out. Don't come back. 102 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:42,920 - You're barred, you filthy bastard. - Don't be so harsh. 103 00:06:43,080 --> 00:06:45,640 You're all right, Jerry, love. Look after yourself. 104 00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:48,040 We'll see you tomorrow. 105 00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:50,320 He's had a tough time of it. 106 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:52,360 Lost his missus to a heart attack. 107 00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:54,880 With her, went all meaning in his life. 108 00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:56,920 He's gonna die alone and he knows it. 109 00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:00,700 He's adrift. Poor soul. 110 00:07:07,800 --> 00:07:12,202 Don't say anything, just listen, right? Here me out, yeah? 111 00:07:12,585 --> 00:07:15,577 I know... Look, I'm on drugs, but... 112 00:07:17,160 --> 00:07:21,080 There are things, right? Feelings that I have buried. You never know when it's 113 00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:23,160 gonna be too late. Erin, I'm terrified 114 00:07:23,320 --> 00:07:26,240 of what it would be like to not be with you. 115 00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:28,800 I wanna be with you. 116 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:31,720 You and Tyler. Yeah, you're all I want. 117 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:33,760 Nothing else matters. 118 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:35,920 If leaving this place is truly what you want, 119 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:38,335 if that'll guarantee our life with you, 120 00:07:38,360 --> 00:07:40,400 the smile on that face, well, then I'll do it. 121 00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:42,680 Let's fucking do it. 122 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:46,440 Look, I will do whatever you want, if it means that I get to be with you. 123 00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:54,030 Fuck. Erin, Erin, Erin, I can't feel my heart. 124 00:07:54,055 --> 00:07:55,104 Jesus! 125 00:07:56,040 --> 00:07:58,200 What are you doing creeping around on the floor? 126 00:07:58,225 --> 00:08:00,145 Scared the shit out of me, you pillock. 127 00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:02,320 - I'm... - On the ground! 128 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:09,840 - Erin, I'm sorry! - Don't move. 129 00:08:09,960 --> 00:08:12,760 - Do not resist. - I'm not resisting. 130 00:08:12,920 --> 00:08:16,120 - Ronald Croft, I'm arresting you... - No. 131 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:20,360 No, that's my brother. That's not him. Ronnie's inside since 18 months. 132 00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:25,120 - This isn't him. - See. - So where is he? 133 00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:28,718 Who? Ronnie? He's in Grendon. He's doing eight years. 134 00:08:28,743 --> 00:08:30,944 He absconded from day release, 135 00:08:31,080 --> 00:08:34,000 assaulted the owner of the garage he was working at. 136 00:08:34,120 --> 00:08:36,040 Check upstairs. 137 00:08:37,440 --> 00:08:39,400 - You OK? - No. 138 00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:45,775 Hey, don't worry. Could have been worse. 139 00:08:45,800 --> 00:08:47,734 Ronnie could actually have been here. 140 00:08:57,920 --> 00:09:00,080 Albie? Albie? 141 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:01,340 He's not here. 142 00:09:01,980 --> 00:09:06,000 - God's sake. Who? Who isn't there, Albie? - Me. I'm not here. 143 00:09:06,620 --> 00:09:09,220 All right. Open the door, please. 144 00:09:09,340 --> 00:09:12,660 Where is he? Albie? 145 00:09:17,180 --> 00:09:19,220 Albie! 146 00:09:19,427 --> 00:09:23,387 Run outside for me, pal. I'm gagging of thirst here. 147 00:09:23,540 --> 00:09:25,820 - All right, Ronnie? - All right, yeah. 148 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:41,013 He needs to go, Erin. We're harbouring a fugitive. 149 00:09:41,360 --> 00:09:43,039 That's jail-time. That's Tyler and Kay. 150 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:45,404 That's us in jail. Would you just send him packing? 151 00:09:45,429 --> 00:09:47,064 Listen. You heard what he said. 152 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:49,440 He's being bullied in prison. He's got drug debts. 153 00:09:49,500 --> 00:09:51,719 - He's pissed off the wrong people. - I don't doubt it. 154 00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:55,060 He pisses everyone off. That's what Ronnie does, all right? 155 00:09:55,085 --> 00:09:58,455 He wreaks havoc and he ruins lives. 156 00:09:58,480 --> 00:10:01,240 Have you forgotten about the credit card he took out in Tyler's name. 157 00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:03,840 Yes, yes, I know, all right. Fuck's sake. 158 00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:06,375 I just want to move away, honestly. 159 00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:09,815 Get away from shit like this. It's not fucking fair. 160 00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:11,040 Hey. Hey. 161 00:10:13,980 --> 00:10:16,660 If you go, I'm coming. 162 00:10:17,820 --> 00:10:20,720 - Do you really mean that? - Yes, I do. 163 00:10:21,540 --> 00:10:22,960 I love you. 164 00:10:23,620 --> 00:10:27,860 Your brother is a fucking dickhead. He's a parasite, Erin. 165 00:10:28,700 --> 00:10:31,575 He will rob, he will cheat and he will lie to anyone 166 00:10:31,600 --> 00:10:34,400 and any minute now the odd lot could be back knocking down that door. 167 00:10:35,860 --> 00:10:38,025 Jesus, Erin, what's going on with this door? 168 00:10:38,050 --> 00:10:39,204 You all right, Vin? 169 00:10:39,340 --> 00:10:42,215 What's he doing? He's meant to be down for an 8 stretch. 170 00:10:42,240 --> 00:10:45,375 He was. He's on day release. So he decided to come here. 171 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:48,780 What do you mean "decided to come here?" They let you do that these days in jail? 172 00:10:48,980 --> 00:10:51,532 He's fallen out with the owner of the garage he was training at. 173 00:10:51,557 --> 00:10:53,839 Yeah, man. He tried to attack us. 174 00:10:53,840 --> 00:10:56,704 Proper, big, nasty bastard. Must have been 6'8". 175 00:10:56,790 --> 00:10:59,335 And he just took an immediate dislike to me, Erin. 176 00:10:59,360 --> 00:11:03,375 And I was like... I was there and he just started to lose the plot. 177 00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:06,855 Accusing me of nicking his cashbox. I didn't even know it fucking existed. 178 00:11:06,880 --> 00:11:09,040 Suddenly starts coming at me, know what I mean? So I'm 179 00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:11,720 like that, slipping it, cos I'm a lover, not a fighter. 180 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:14,160 And then... I don't know. Next thing, you know, 181 00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:16,200 I had no choice, so had to run him over. 182 00:11:16,360 --> 00:11:18,763 Wait. What do you mean you ran him over? You kiddin' me? 183 00:11:18,802 --> 00:11:20,818 Well, I wasn't going fast man. I was in reverse. 184 00:11:20,843 --> 00:11:21,895 "In reverse"? 185 00:11:21,920 --> 00:11:25,375 - Erin. Erin, I swear on Tyler's life... - Don't you dare. 186 00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:27,095 What? I had no choice, man. 187 00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,376 What? Like when they offered you that deal to grass up. 188 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,098 Dave Geffen and Arjan Khan, remember that? 189 00:11:31,123 --> 00:11:32,153 I'm not having it, 190 00:11:32,177 --> 00:11:34,095 - wasn't my fault. - Yes, it was. You know it. 191 00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:36,015 And this guy is literally a shit magnet. 192 00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:38,136 Get him out of here before he gets you all banged up. 193 00:11:38,160 --> 00:11:41,935 See, this is what I'm talking about. No-one wants to see Ronnie Croft thrive. 194 00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:45,455 Man's here, trying his best to open a new leaf. 195 00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:48,175 - And the whole world is just against him. - Turn over. - You what? 196 00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:51,800 Turn over a new leaf. Not "open a new leaf." "Turn open a new leaf?" 197 00:11:51,960 --> 00:11:54,520 He literally doesn't understand the saying. 198 00:11:54,680 --> 00:11:57,120 This is what I'm talking about. Pettiness. Pettiness, 199 00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:59,640 pettiness, pettiness. This is what I'm up against. 200 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:03,120 Well, oh, I'm sorry, Dylan, that I wasn't having the time 201 00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:05,536 to go to fucking... What's it called where you learn? 202 00:12:05,561 --> 00:12:06,604 - School... - School 203 00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:09,280 to learn to be a smart arse. But I was a bit busy, 204 00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:12,160 cos I had to keep my sister from being put into care 205 00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:16,240 because my mam and dad are both being sent down. Come on, we're family. 206 00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:19,680 - All right, get off. - Fair enough. What's that? 207 00:12:22,320 --> 00:12:25,080 Yeah, it's the cashbox. I couldn't fucking leave it, could I? 208 00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:26,540 Unbelievable. 209 00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:30,900 - Come on. - What do you mean? Fuck off. 210 00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:44,920 Right, here's what we're gonna do. You two are gonna get him to Jim's. Right? 211 00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:49,160 I'll have a word with Kath. She knows a guy with a boat 212 00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:51,600 I'll see if he can get him across the water. 213 00:12:51,660 --> 00:12:54,936 - He can go on living on Uncle Pat's farm. - What's Ireland done to deserve that? 214 00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:57,740 Vinnie, please. Don't do it for him. 215 00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:00,180 Do it for me. Tyler. Please. 216 00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:02,760 Yeah. All right. Come on, let's get a shift on. 217 00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:05,839 Right. And wait. Before you go, if the police come around here snooping, 218 00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:09,600 I want everything that isn't legit out of the house. If it's nicked, I want it gone. 219 00:13:10,188 --> 00:13:13,520 - The washer. - That's nicked, yeah. 220 00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:17,360 - All right, dryer. - Yeah, it's nicked. 221 00:13:17,420 --> 00:13:18,434 Microwave. 222 00:13:18,459 --> 00:13:21,175 - Microwave. All came as a set, love. - Fuck's sake. 223 00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:24,655 Anything that's electric, it's been stolen. TV and everything. 224 00:13:24,680 --> 00:13:27,080 Right. Everything, out. 225 00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:29,060 I'll get a van. 226 00:13:31,940 --> 00:13:34,700 You know they don't milk themselves, don't you, Jim? 227 00:13:34,820 --> 00:13:37,020 I know that, smart arse. 228 00:13:37,180 --> 00:13:41,420 See that silver bucket, I'm waiting on her to do a piss test. 229 00:13:41,540 --> 00:13:44,980 - A what? - Piss test. Drugs test. 230 00:13:46,260 --> 00:13:48,855 You see any of that commotion on Denby Row? 231 00:13:48,880 --> 00:13:52,020 Two coppers went out expecting a dead body. 232 00:13:52,180 --> 00:13:55,460 Found a massive fuck off weed farm, instead. 233 00:13:56,140 --> 00:13:58,780 Posted a copper outside standing sentry 234 00:13:58,980 --> 00:14:01,304 so they can get a team and some vans down there, 235 00:14:01,329 --> 00:14:03,439 - in the morning. - What? They haven't taken it? 236 00:14:03,440 --> 00:14:06,270 What can you do at 11:30 on a Friday night? 237 00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:09,455 Need manpower. Vans. 238 00:14:09,480 --> 00:14:12,455 It's Erin. Hey, you. You get them boat from Liverpool. 239 00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:14,741 Erin's coming to pick you up from here at 4:00am. 240 00:14:14,766 --> 00:14:15,824 Yeah, OK, man. 241 00:14:18,840 --> 00:14:21,252 Last time they raided one of those houses, 242 00:14:21,300 --> 00:14:23,700 it was like professional grow lights and, and 243 00:14:23,900 --> 00:14:26,451 - irrigation, temperature control... - See, she's not 244 00:14:26,476 --> 00:14:28,924 used to all that weed. She's got the shits now. 245 00:14:32,797 --> 00:14:34,757 We're gonna need a bigger van. 246 00:14:42,140 --> 00:14:43,620 What? 247 00:14:54,620 --> 00:14:57,820 - Have you not got anything else, no? - Nothing wrong with this. 248 00:14:58,020 --> 00:15:00,839 Low mileage, surprising amount of storage as well and most importantly, 249 00:15:00,840 --> 00:15:03,535 low profile, all right? Blends in unnoticed. 250 00:15:03,560 --> 00:15:07,200 You said you had a van, dude. Said you had a fucking van-van is what you said. 251 00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:09,240 Yeah, but this is a flippin' van-van. 252 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:13,860 But this, it's inappropriate. 253 00:15:14,380 --> 00:15:17,052 It's a van. That's why they even call them ice 254 00:15:17,077 --> 00:15:19,464 cream vans, innit? Do you want it or not? 255 00:15:21,260 --> 00:15:24,500 - Aw, yeah. - All right. And erm... 256 00:15:24,900 --> 00:15:27,580 - Gotta pump the brakes to make them work. - Pump the brakes? 257 00:15:27,740 --> 00:15:30,260 - Exactly. - How is that a thing? 258 00:15:31,620 --> 00:15:33,580 - Get in the van. - So ungrateful. 259 00:15:38,740 --> 00:15:41,060 - Oke-a-doke. - What? 260 00:15:41,220 --> 00:15:45,540 - None of you recognise the cop? - Let me have a look through them. 261 00:15:47,900 --> 00:15:50,740 I thought that looked like him, dude, that's Carl Slater, man. 262 00:15:50,860 --> 00:15:53,079 - Oh, wait. - Who? - Carl Slater. 263 00:15:53,080 --> 00:15:55,280 This snidey little twat we were at school with. 264 00:15:55,440 --> 00:15:58,537 - Vin's mortal enemy since year five. - Year four. 265 00:15:58,562 --> 00:16:00,351 Grassed me up for nicking milk off the float. 266 00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:01,479 He would get us in shit. 267 00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:04,880 So, Vince started a little rumour about Carl, that got a bit out of control, 268 00:16:05,040 --> 00:16:07,480 - became an urban myth. - What was the rumour? 269 00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:09,720 That Carl bummed his nan's dog. 270 00:16:10,872 --> 00:16:13,552 Spread like wildfire. Everyone believed it. 271 00:16:15,202 --> 00:16:18,500 - Mud sticks 20 years later. - Car, car, car. 272 00:16:20,780 --> 00:16:24,680 That looks like the McDonaghs. You know, I bet it's one of their farms. 273 00:16:25,340 --> 00:16:29,280 Sorry, Barry. Cops have got it. Go on, piss off. 274 00:16:30,380 --> 00:16:33,300 - There's a cop guarding the door in. - Even the McDonaghs quit. 275 00:16:33,460 --> 00:16:35,620 There's no way of doing this. Let's go home. 276 00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:39,260 You're a smart lad, dildo, but sometimes you lack a bit of ingenuity. 277 00:16:39,460 --> 00:16:43,300 We could do it in seconds. How long does it take to fill a couple of bloody bin bags? 278 00:16:43,460 --> 00:16:46,140 - How are we gonna get in though? - It's the perfect crime. 279 00:16:47,047 --> 00:16:51,080 It's so fucking stupid no-one will think anyone will be daft enough to try. 280 00:16:54,894 --> 00:16:56,420 Oh, shit. 281 00:17:17,620 --> 00:17:18,980 Oh, shit. 282 00:17:49,300 --> 00:17:52,119 - That's not good. - No, it's still closed. Let's fuck it off. 283 00:17:52,120 --> 00:17:55,260 Are you off your head? We've just gone through all that for nothing? 284 00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:57,260 Come on. 285 00:18:08,431 --> 00:18:10,280 Oh, fuck. 286 00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:20,200 - Hello? - Vinnie? 287 00:18:20,360 --> 00:18:23,720 - Vinnie, how are you, man? - Not so bad, man. What's going on? 288 00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:27,200 Listen, I'm here with some friends from uni and we... The word is 289 00:18:27,360 --> 00:18:30,560 there's a bit of a drought on with the old silage crop. 290 00:18:30,720 --> 00:18:34,000 I happen to mention that I'm pretty tight with the main man. 291 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:37,440 And so, these reprobates were wondering if I could deliver the goods. 292 00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:40,961 - You know anywhere we can get some? - That I do, Christoph. 293 00:18:40,986 --> 00:18:42,186 Let me call you back in a sec? 294 00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:45,645 Yes, Vinnie, hey, wait. Vinnie, look. If it's a problem, 295 00:18:45,670 --> 00:18:48,175 I can come over to you. I'll just get in a cab. 296 00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:52,540 Yeah, you can do that? Vin? 297 00:19:04,820 --> 00:19:07,420 - Easy, Vin. - Ronnie, is that you? - Yeah, man. - For fuck... 298 00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:10,020 You scared the shit outta me. What are you doing here? 299 00:19:10,180 --> 00:19:12,300 - I'm here for the ganja. - The fuck you are. 300 00:19:12,460 --> 00:19:15,300 - That's our gear that. How did you get in? - The back door, mate. 301 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:17,200 Are you havin' a giraffe. There's a back door? 302 00:19:17,225 --> 00:19:18,304 Yeah. 303 00:19:18,340 --> 00:19:20,320 Piss off before I lose my patience with you. 304 00:19:20,380 --> 00:19:23,340 I ain't gonna do that, mate. You wanna know why? Finders keepers. 305 00:19:23,540 --> 00:19:25,980 - Losers... Fucking weepers? - You bellend. 306 00:19:26,100 --> 00:19:28,580 - Stop it. - Hey. 307 00:19:35,980 --> 00:19:39,079 - Damn. Dammit. I'm all right. - Where are you? 308 00:19:39,080 --> 00:19:42,160 Oh, man, see. Now what are we gonna do? 309 00:19:42,320 --> 00:19:47,080 - I'm gonna murder this twat, Dylan. - Cardi! - I'm, I'm stuck. 310 00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:52,200 This is the police. We are in the building. Come out with your hands raised. 311 00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:01,320 The fuck are you supposed to be? 312 00:20:15,118 --> 00:20:17,078 - Oi, lads. - Up here, Tommo. 313 00:20:18,798 --> 00:20:20,918 Lot of dope in house... Oh, fuck off. 314 00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:24,959 - How are you doing, lad? - Hang on a minute. You know this fella? 315 00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:27,120 - It's Carl Slater, Ronnie. - Slater. 316 00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:31,880 Carl, Carl Slater. I didn't even recognise you in that get up. 317 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:35,280 Dog bummer! Hey, well, I never. 318 00:20:35,440 --> 00:20:38,400 I heard your nan went catatonic when she walked in on you 319 00:20:38,560 --> 00:20:42,480 - up to your nuts in a poodle. - I heard it were a terrier. 320 00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:46,640 No, it was a poodle, Tommo. Never bummed a fucking dog. 321 00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:51,760 Wait, wait, wait. So, you go from being a dog bummer to being a cop. 322 00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:55,428 People say I do daft shit. Tell me why you want 323 00:20:55,453 --> 00:20:57,504 to go and do something stupid like that for? 324 00:20:57,680 --> 00:21:01,280 There was a number of things that attracted me to the profession. But, I suppose 325 00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:05,880 getting to put away inbred, pikey twats like yourselves was probably the main draw. 326 00:21:06,040 --> 00:21:09,120 Strong words, man. Strong words from a kid who bummed his nan's dog. 327 00:21:09,280 --> 00:21:12,406 - I didn't bum a fucking dog. - Carl, Carl, listen to me, man. 328 00:21:12,460 --> 00:21:15,034 We didn't want this. We didn't mean to involve you in anything. 329 00:21:15,058 --> 00:21:16,859 Well, you are involved now, so... 330 00:21:16,860 --> 00:21:20,540 - You shut the fuck up, Ronnie. Christ. - Right, Dylan. 331 00:21:20,640 --> 00:21:23,235 You're very quiet over there. So, this is where 332 00:21:23,260 --> 00:21:25,775 hanging on to Vinnie's coat tails has got you? 333 00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:29,599 Kidnapping police officers with criminal masterminds like Ronnie fucking Croft. 334 00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:31,650 Should've listened to Mr McKelvey's warnings. 335 00:21:31,675 --> 00:21:33,144 Nobody's kidnapping coppers. 336 00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:35,375 We're not involved with Ronnie, that's just a 337 00:21:35,400 --> 00:21:37,544 fucking babysitting job that's gone a bit awry. 338 00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:39,800 Hang on a minute. You're gonna explain yourself 339 00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:42,240 to bacon bollocks after he called you a pikey twat. 340 00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:44,800 - He was talking to you, you mophead. - Was he? 341 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:49,800 - I was referring to all of ya, in general. - All right, look, can we just... 342 00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:54,040 Let's just figure out a way, out of this that benefits us all, shall we? 343 00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:58,840 Yeah? Yeah, OK, yeah. Sure. Untie me. 344 00:22:00,647 --> 00:22:02,746 I will untie you. But then what? 345 00:22:02,771 --> 00:22:05,824 And then, you all come with me to the nick. 346 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:09,599 - See, I don't wanna do that. I can't... - You don't have an option. Fuck. 347 00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:13,815 There is no way out of this, Vinnie. You've screwed yourself proper this time. 348 00:22:13,840 --> 00:22:17,880 You know what, mate, you know what? You're right about there being no way out of this, 349 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:22,480 but you are dead wrong about who's fucked themselves. Cos, yeah. 350 00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:25,935 There's only one knobhead tied to a chair and that's not fucking me. 351 00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:28,240 Ronnie, Ronnie, let's just stop calling each other names, 352 00:22:28,265 --> 00:22:30,544 shall we? Try and figure a way out of this. 353 00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:32,770 Negotiate. Is that you're saying? Negotiate with him. 354 00:22:32,795 --> 00:22:33,824 Yeah. 355 00:22:33,900 --> 00:22:36,012 You got him tied to a fucking chair. Am I the 356 00:22:36,037 --> 00:22:38,104 only one who knows how a kidnapping works? 357 00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:41,440 No, it's not... No, no, no, it's not a fucking kidnapping. 358 00:22:41,600 --> 00:22:44,080 - It is. - It isn't a kidnapping. - Right, Vinnie. 359 00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:47,600 The ball's in your court. And you know what? You're acting like an amateur. 360 00:22:47,760 --> 00:22:50,800 - You're showing him you're weak. - I'm appealing to his common sense. 361 00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:53,720 - Vinnie, he's a copper. - Oh, you're such a fucking genius. 362 00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:56,094 What's your idea, then? What's your big plan then, Rob? 363 00:22:56,119 --> 00:22:57,132 Basic, mate. 364 00:22:57,133 --> 00:23:02,015 It's elementary stuff, right? You got two options but only one choice. 365 00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:06,760 You let this dog fucker go and he trots back to his piggy, piggy mates. 366 00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:09,000 Eh, trot back? And they all come down to 367 00:23:09,025 --> 00:23:11,264 your gaff with their piggy piggy truncheons, 368 00:23:11,440 --> 00:23:15,300 they twat your head in and beat you all down and they drag you off to jail. Or... 369 00:23:15,700 --> 00:23:19,775 - You just eliminate the problem. - Do you mean fucking kill him? 370 00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:22,679 - You're off your fucking head, Ronnie. - Do you know what, lads? 371 00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:25,180 Enjoy... I hope you enjoy jail more than I did 372 00:23:25,205 --> 00:23:27,704 cos you're gonna be there a long fucking time. 373 00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:30,160 Come on, Vin, how long have we known...? 374 00:23:30,780 --> 00:23:33,580 Look. Shittin' himself now, and rightly so. 375 00:23:33,740 --> 00:23:36,455 He's ready to make a deal cos he's desperate. 376 00:23:36,480 --> 00:23:39,419 And do you know what he's gonna do? He's gonna promise you the world now. 377 00:23:39,420 --> 00:23:43,695 Aren't you? But the thing is, you know, and I fucking know 378 00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:47,600 that whatever he says now is worthless. Yeah? 379 00:23:47,760 --> 00:23:51,980 He leaves here alive, youse lot, you're going to jail, mate. 380 00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:56,500 Help! I'm... 381 00:23:58,120 --> 00:24:00,400 - Tape, tape, tape. - Calm down. 382 00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:03,360 Fucking hell, whinge, whinge, whinge, whinge, whinge. 383 00:24:03,480 --> 00:24:06,480 Someone get him a poodle. Jesus. 384 00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,760 Come in, Bravo 12-57, over. 385 00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:24,680 B1257 with the number on Slater's epaulette. They're calling him. 386 00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:27,160 - Then fucking smash it up. - Don't fucking smash it. 387 00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:31,840 - What's up wi' you? - How can he send the signal? 388 00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:36,640 12-57 reading, go ahead control, over. 389 00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:40,240 We're trying to reach, 12-57. Why the radio silence? 390 00:24:40,400 --> 00:24:44,760 - Is everything all right over there? - Well, I just went for a dump. 391 00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:48,120 - Why, did you want to listen? Over. - Copy that, 1257. 392 00:24:48,280 --> 00:24:51,000 I've got a team together to dismantle this cannabis factory. 393 00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:53,840 Be with you in just over an hour at 05:30. 394 00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:57,040 Copy that, control. 1257, over and out. 395 00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:02,040 - Cheers, Tommo, that was badass, man. - Yeah, I know. 396 00:25:05,360 --> 00:25:08,520 Argh! It's digging in to me and you're pulling me up. 397 00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:11,640 You've got a wedgie. You've got a wedgie. I can see your bollocks. 398 00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:14,440 JJ, I need your help. 399 00:25:14,647 --> 00:25:17,447 - Get me out of this fucking hole. - I don't care 400 00:25:17,472 --> 00:25:20,271 that it's early, dude, I need your help, man. 401 00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:26,560 - What are we doing? - What? 402 00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:31,960 Well, we're all in. 403 00:26:08,960 --> 00:26:11,680 - I think now he's coming out. - We're doing it. 404 00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:15,800 - What? - We've got you, man. 405 00:26:20,321 --> 00:26:21,365 Cardi? 406 00:26:21,390 --> 00:26:24,495 Did you see that? That was like some proper You've Been Framed shit. 407 00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:26,600 - Tell me you got that on camera. - I'm all right. 408 00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:30,950 Hey, cool. Look what I've found. Fish gun! 409 00:26:30,975 --> 00:26:32,024 No. 410 00:26:32,120 --> 00:26:34,120 - Shine on. - Pecker head? 411 00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:55,680 Ah, thought you could do with this. 412 00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:02,880 All right, Carl. 413 00:27:05,774 --> 00:27:11,520 Look, man, I'm sorry. I am. I'm sorry about school. I took that fuckin job way too far. 414 00:27:15,639 --> 00:27:18,192 I was an angry kid and a difficult time for me, 415 00:27:18,217 --> 00:27:20,504 - back then... - Don't fucking bother. Just... 416 00:27:23,075 --> 00:27:27,220 Just don't bother. You're making me cringe. 417 00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:31,400 Fucking loser. 418 00:27:33,317 --> 00:27:36,197 You know, I never imagined how low you'd sink. 419 00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:40,500 But then again, how could you not, eh? 420 00:27:41,380 --> 00:27:45,220 Spawn of a half-wit thief, mentally unstable mother... 421 00:27:46,060 --> 00:27:50,780 I remember her showing up to school in her fucking nightie, crying. 422 00:27:50,940 --> 00:27:54,480 You just stood there, in the playground. 423 00:27:56,140 --> 00:27:58,620 Bet you remember that, don't you, Dylan? 424 00:28:02,140 --> 00:28:04,380 "Vinnie, we're out of milk, Vinnie!" 425 00:28:05,154 --> 00:28:06,317 Just fucking amazing. 426 00:28:06,342 --> 00:28:09,164 - Close your fucking mouth. - Went in, she was, 427 00:28:09,300 --> 00:28:12,640 just like you. Hey, did she ever show up again? No. 428 00:28:12,700 --> 00:28:15,147 I wouldn't come back for you either. She's probably 429 00:28:15,172 --> 00:28:17,524 chucked herself underneath a fucking train, mate. 430 00:28:17,660 --> 00:28:23,100 Ashamed at creating such a backward, no-good, whatever the fuck you are. 431 00:28:24,500 --> 00:28:26,460 You listen to me, Carl. 432 00:28:26,660 --> 00:28:28,682 I'm gonna put you in a back of that ice-cream 433 00:28:28,707 --> 00:28:30,244 van and drive you up to them hills 434 00:28:30,420 --> 00:28:33,900 I'm gonna dig a pit, I'm gonna fucking put you in it and bury you underground. 435 00:28:35,180 --> 00:28:37,920 The last thing you're gonna see is my face, me. 436 00:28:38,740 --> 00:28:43,380 Grinning, as you beg to take them words back through gobfuls of soil you 437 00:28:43,500 --> 00:28:46,320 dog-bumming twat. 438 00:29:06,580 --> 00:29:08,660 Jesus, Tommo, man, what is going on here? 439 00:29:08,820 --> 00:29:11,060 Lend someone a bloody ice-cream van, you don't 440 00:29:11,220 --> 00:29:13,660 expect to be an accessory in kidnapping a bloody popo. 441 00:29:13,820 --> 00:29:16,260 Fuck it. What else were you gonna do tonight, stay in? 442 00:29:26,780 --> 00:29:30,060 - Tommo? - We've got a problem. - Vinnie? - What? - Tommo. 443 00:29:33,180 --> 00:29:36,020 - What's going on, Tom? - There's someone here. - What? 444 00:29:36,180 --> 00:29:39,500 Well, fuck. Is it the McDonaghs? What does he look like? 445 00:29:40,460 --> 00:29:42,660 Looks like a right knobhead, red trousers. 446 00:29:43,980 --> 00:29:46,380 Red trousers? Erm... 447 00:29:47,300 --> 00:29:49,420 Oh, shit. 448 00:29:50,580 --> 00:29:51,860 Vinnie? 449 00:29:53,149 --> 00:29:56,060 Hello? Vinnie? 450 00:29:56,180 --> 00:29:58,100 What the fuck...? 451 00:29:58,220 --> 00:30:00,140 Vinnie, I can hear your phone. 452 00:30:00,260 --> 00:30:01,780 Fuck. 453 00:30:02,300 --> 00:30:04,300 - Vinnie! - Shit. 454 00:30:04,420 --> 00:30:05,700 Vinnie! 455 00:30:06,580 --> 00:30:09,500 - What're you doing here? - Can I get some of the doobage? 456 00:30:09,980 --> 00:30:12,020 I got this chick, Leone. 457 00:30:12,180 --> 00:30:15,375 She got frisky with me once at a Jamiroquai concert. 458 00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:17,560 I don't care. How'd you even find me, Dude? 459 00:30:17,680 --> 00:30:20,320 "Find your Friend". Here, look. 460 00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:22,400 I don't even have find your bloody friend. 461 00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:24,520 - It's great, it's handy. - Crying out loud. 462 00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:26,559 I fucking do have it. How do I delete that? 463 00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:29,120 - Are you having a party? - No... - Is that a weed house? 464 00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:31,200 - No, it's not a weed house. - It is. - Piss off. 465 00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:33,200 Fuck. 466 00:30:33,320 --> 00:30:35,320 Get the fuck out. Fuck off. 467 00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:38,480 Do yourself a favour, just do one, man. Less you know the better. 468 00:30:38,640 --> 00:30:41,360 All right, but sort me out, come on. Leone. 469 00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:44,440 - Wait there, wait there. - Yeah, yeah. 470 00:30:44,560 --> 00:30:46,480 Hell's teeth. 471 00:30:46,640 --> 00:30:48,960 - Fucking, Chris. - Who's Chris? 472 00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:51,480 A pain in the arse. 473 00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:01,680 Jesus. Wow. 474 00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:04,360 - Hi, I'm Chris. - Are you kidding? 475 00:31:05,080 --> 00:31:06,860 Hi. Hey, Chris. 476 00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:09,440 - Hey, Chris, friend of Vinnie's. - Cardi. 477 00:31:09,600 --> 00:31:11,880 - Hi, Cardi. Nice to see you. - Pleasure. Rose? 478 00:31:12,040 --> 00:31:14,600 Very pleasant. It's a quite pleasant one, this one, yeah. 479 00:31:14,760 --> 00:31:16,640 A friend of my dad, he's got a vineyard. 480 00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:20,040 No. Fuck no. No, no, no, no. 481 00:31:20,200 --> 00:31:22,720 What the fuck did I... Get out, dude. I told you man. 482 00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:25,160 - Hello, Chris. Friend of Vinnie's, eh? - Fuck! 483 00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:27,200 Hello, Chris. Friend of Vinnie's. 484 00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:29,360 Look it's all right. Don't worry about me. 485 00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:32,280 You are not cool. Don't touch it. Stop. Dude, I swear... 486 00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:34,340 Go get the fuck out. 487 00:31:35,420 --> 00:31:37,500 Ghost of Long John Silver. 488 00:31:42,060 --> 00:31:43,620 Fuck. 489 00:31:44,140 --> 00:31:46,380 Is that a real policeman? 490 00:31:53,100 --> 00:31:55,620 I'm gonna get... I'd better get back to my dinner party. 491 00:31:58,860 --> 00:32:02,700 No fucker leaves. Fuck. 492 00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:20,880 - What's going on here, Vinnie? - Look, nothing. I'll just... 493 00:32:21,459 --> 00:32:23,619 - I'll sort it. - Is this a sex thing? 494 00:32:23,997 --> 00:32:25,879 You gonna gang-wank me or something? 495 00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:28,880 You've dropped him in it now. Have to dig two graves tonight. 496 00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:30,920 Would you just shut the fuck up, Ronnie? 497 00:32:31,080 --> 00:32:33,120 I'll bury you if you don't put down that gun. 498 00:32:33,280 --> 00:32:35,720 What've you got involved in, Vinnie? 499 00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:37,760 - Who is this lad, Vin? - He's me GP, 500 00:32:37,920 --> 00:32:40,696 and he's cool, he' cool. All right, no, he's all right. 501 00:32:40,721 --> 00:32:43,161 Just, he's bound by, what is it? 502 00:32:43,321 --> 00:32:45,361 Patient confidentiality or some shit. 503 00:32:45,521 --> 00:32:47,721 Yeah? Yeah. Does that cover kidnapping coppers? 504 00:32:47,881 --> 00:32:50,718 I'm pretty sure I'd have to report that sort of thing. 505 00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:52,680 Do you wanna leave here alive tonight, you? 506 00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:55,840 Well, actually even if it did fall under patient confidentiality, 507 00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:58,480 in fact, I'd have a conflict of interest, cos Carl here 508 00:32:58,600 --> 00:33:00,399 is also one of my patients. 509 00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:03,159 You all right, Carl? I didn't recognise you with the gag on. You... 510 00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:06,000 How's it... Are you feeling better down there? 511 00:33:06,120 --> 00:33:08,895 Shut up. Stop making words, dude. 512 00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:12,240 Just fuck me. He's fine, all right? He's cool, he's not gonna say nothing. 513 00:33:12,340 --> 00:33:13,380 - Is he cool? - Yeah. 514 00:33:13,405 --> 00:33:15,924 Yeah? Your mate's just admitted he's been a cop-doctor. 515 00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:18,520 - A what? - A cop-doctor. - A cop-doctor? - Yeah. 516 00:33:18,680 --> 00:33:22,040 - Cop-doctor? Is that a thing? Is it? - Of course it fucking is! 517 00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:25,200 Of course it is. He's a doctor of cops, isn't he? 518 00:33:25,320 --> 00:33:26,879 He's fucking one of them. 519 00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:30,455 You're gonna have to have a long fucking think about why your mate 520 00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:33,160 is talking to a fucking cop-doctor. 521 00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:35,880 It wouldn't surprise me if he planned this whole thing 522 00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:37,920 to set youse lot up. 523 00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:43,480 Vin? Are you having a fucking giraffe? 524 00:33:43,640 --> 00:33:46,375 Are you seriously listening to Robbie fucking Croft? 525 00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:48,280 No, but why have you got a cop-doctor? 526 00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:50,840 I haven't got a cop-doctor you fucking bellend. 527 00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:52,880 - That's fucking it. - Hey, hey, hey. 528 00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:56,680 - Come on, mate. - Wait... 529 00:33:56,840 --> 00:33:59,375 I know you're in there, open this fricking door. 530 00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:00,444 Dickhead. 531 00:34:05,480 --> 00:34:08,320 - You all right? - Hey. - Where's Ronnie? He's not in the van. 532 00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:10,400 - How'd you find over here? - "Find your friend". 533 00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:12,440 - I'm not on "Find your friend". - He is. 534 00:34:12,560 --> 00:34:14,940 God fucking dammit, Dylan. 535 00:34:15,600 --> 00:34:16,900 No! 536 00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:22,040 - Everything all right, is it? - Yeah! - Yeah? 537 00:34:22,200 --> 00:34:25,000 - Don't come in. - Where is he? - No, no, no, no. 538 00:34:25,120 --> 00:34:27,040 - Erin, no. - Erin, no. Fuck. 539 00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:30,639 - Hi, Erin. - Hi, Erin. - How's things, Erin? 540 00:34:30,640 --> 00:34:32,800 - The fuck's going on? - Just chilling out. 541 00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:41,255 Please tell me this is just some sort of fucked-up sex thing. 542 00:34:41,280 --> 00:34:42,299 That's what I said. 543 00:34:42,324 --> 00:34:44,319 You don't understand what we've been dealing with. 544 00:34:44,320 --> 00:34:47,259 - Your idiot brother's caused all this. - I asked you to look after him. 545 00:34:47,260 --> 00:34:50,695 Keep him out of the way at the barn. Why is he in a weed farm 546 00:34:50,720 --> 00:34:53,080 with a fucking copper tied to a chair? Who's he? 547 00:34:53,240 --> 00:34:55,600 - He's a cop-doctor. - Ronnie, shut the fuck up. 548 00:34:55,660 --> 00:34:57,759 This is exactly what I've been dealing with all day. 549 00:34:57,760 --> 00:35:00,855 Threatening, bullying behaviour. "Shut the F up Ronnie." 550 00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:02,600 "I'm gonna effing F you up, Ronnie." 551 00:35:02,760 --> 00:35:05,306 And it's been hard, mate. It's been really tough. 552 00:35:05,331 --> 00:35:06,375 Shut up, Ronald. 553 00:35:06,400 --> 00:35:08,880 - You said to kill him. - I'm offering him options, Erin. 554 00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:10,920 Shut up. Shut up. 555 00:35:11,080 --> 00:35:13,050 Why is there a police officer tied to a chair? 556 00:35:13,075 --> 00:35:14,164 All right. 557 00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:16,220 Officer Slater, was standing guard outside, 558 00:35:16,280 --> 00:35:19,560 we've had to accidentally kidnap him a little bit. Haven't we, Carl? 559 00:35:19,720 --> 00:35:22,200 Carl... Carl Slater as in, Carl Slater that bums dogs? 560 00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:24,360 Yeah. What are you all doing? 561 00:35:24,560 --> 00:35:27,800 Stop it. Stop it with the dog bumming thing. Listen, it's not helpful. 562 00:35:27,976 --> 00:35:31,336 He's still sore about that. He says we're all going to jail for kidnapping. 563 00:35:31,520 --> 00:35:34,000 - You're all a bunch of fucking idiots. - Idiots, man. 564 00:35:34,160 --> 00:35:36,900 - But you. - What? - You're a special kind of idiot, you are. 565 00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:38,030 Erin... 566 00:35:38,055 --> 00:35:39,964 How the fuck do you manage to ruin everything? 567 00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:42,400 - I don't, I bring some colour to... - Yes, you fucking do. 568 00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:44,480 You ruin your own life and you ruin mine as well. 569 00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:46,560 - I'm not ruining it... - Yes, you are. 570 00:35:46,720 --> 00:35:48,486 I'm an accessory now. I'm going to prison. 571 00:35:48,511 --> 00:35:49,604 Erin, Erin. 572 00:35:49,640 --> 00:35:51,900 - Tyler's gonna go to fucking care. - Erin. Erin. 573 00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:53,230 Erin. 574 00:35:53,255 --> 00:35:57,064 Come here, Ronnie. Fucking have you, Ronnie! Get off. 575 00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:00,760 Erin, I'm not... Fuck. 576 00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:04,280 Listen to me. I'm gonna go and deal with this. 577 00:36:04,440 --> 00:36:07,508 Go and get everything in that van and get it out of here. 578 00:36:07,533 --> 00:36:09,453 What about these two? 579 00:36:11,133 --> 00:36:13,293 We're gonna have to take 'em with us. 580 00:36:22,253 --> 00:36:23,580 Where is she? 581 00:36:25,540 --> 00:36:27,940 Negotiate Cardi's massive hole. 582 00:36:30,260 --> 00:36:32,400 Not for the first time, I'll tell you. 583 00:36:34,020 --> 00:36:37,775 Listen, we've got about 35 minutes, 584 00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:40,375 until two vans full of coppers descend on this place. 585 00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:43,840 - We've gotta get out of here. - What's the point? 586 00:36:47,240 --> 00:36:51,020 You know, I must've done something fucking terrible in a previous life. 587 00:36:52,340 --> 00:36:55,400 I'm stuck on karmic roundabout and I can't get off. 588 00:36:58,940 --> 00:37:01,420 What am I looking at for aiding and abetting? 589 00:37:04,820 --> 00:37:06,780 This is all my fault, you know. 590 00:37:08,100 --> 00:37:10,780 - It is. - It's not. 591 00:37:10,900 --> 00:37:12,599 I dragged Dylan here. 592 00:37:12,600 --> 00:37:15,860 I'm probably the reason Slater turned out like he did. 593 00:37:18,900 --> 00:37:21,740 I took it out on him when my mum was bad. 594 00:37:24,420 --> 00:37:27,180 They called it bouts, back then. 595 00:37:27,300 --> 00:37:29,220 They didn't call it bipolar. 596 00:37:30,900 --> 00:37:32,860 It was just bouts. 597 00:37:36,660 --> 00:37:38,620 She was all over the place. 598 00:37:38,780 --> 00:37:43,060 I mean, wallpapering the kitchen before breakfast one minute and... 599 00:37:46,380 --> 00:37:49,580 standing in the school yard the next, crying cos we hadn't got milk. 600 00:37:53,620 --> 00:37:55,580 I should've moved away. 601 00:37:59,100 --> 00:38:01,615 But I was scared, you know, I was scared that 602 00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:03,560 maybe if she did came back... 603 00:38:04,040 --> 00:38:06,760 If she came back she won't know where to find me. 604 00:38:08,900 --> 00:38:11,279 It's like when you're little, you know, 605 00:38:11,280 --> 00:38:13,820 if you get lost in a supermarket. 606 00:38:15,600 --> 00:38:17,560 My mum used to stay just stay put. 607 00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:21,940 Stay put, I'll come and find you... 608 00:38:22,900 --> 00:38:25,820 and I did. I stayed put... 609 00:38:27,340 --> 00:38:29,620 and she just didn't come back. 610 00:38:32,420 --> 00:38:36,255 It's been 20 years, I've been stuck in the same bloody supermarket. 611 00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:38,640 She still haven't come back for me. 612 00:38:43,840 --> 00:38:47,160 I'm supposed to listen to all your problems. Bloody offloaded me own. 613 00:38:48,921 --> 00:38:52,100 What if he's got it? Tyler? 614 00:38:54,020 --> 00:38:56,900 What if he's got bad blood and he got it from me? 615 00:38:57,020 --> 00:38:58,980 He hasn't, he's fine. 616 00:38:59,100 --> 00:39:01,020 And if he has, we deal with it. 617 00:39:01,180 --> 00:39:03,420 I don't want him to know I'm his real dad. 618 00:39:05,140 --> 00:39:08,060 I just don't want him thinking this is how you end up, you know. 619 00:39:10,660 --> 00:39:14,260 No. I want him to be real man. 620 00:39:15,380 --> 00:39:17,060 Like Dylan. 621 00:39:17,500 --> 00:39:19,460 I reckon... 622 00:39:19,620 --> 00:39:22,140 I reckon, if I didn't know my mum and dad, 623 00:39:22,580 --> 00:39:25,660 you know if you could just get rid of all the bad memories... 624 00:39:26,780 --> 00:39:29,540 I could've been a completely different person. 625 00:39:30,820 --> 00:39:33,140 Just start fresh, you know. 626 00:39:33,900 --> 00:39:37,940 - Oh, my God. - Erin? - I need five minutes. 627 00:39:38,060 --> 00:39:39,700 Ten, max. 628 00:39:46,368 --> 00:39:49,635 God's sake, Carl. It's ridiculous... 629 00:39:49,660 --> 00:39:50,959 How much have you had to drink? 630 00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:54,655 Who's been giving him fucking drinks? You did you bloody idiot, upstairs. 631 00:39:54,680 --> 00:39:56,279 No more liquids for him. 632 00:39:56,280 --> 00:39:58,495 He's like bloody Seabiscuit down here. 633 00:39:58,520 --> 00:40:01,335 Why am I the only one holding his little, pale knob? 634 00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:03,240 - Let me get in. - What? - I'm trying to help. 635 00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:06,240 You're making it weird. It's like a threesome now. 636 00:40:06,400 --> 00:40:09,040 - What? Do you need to pee and all? - Yeah. 637 00:40:09,200 --> 00:40:11,560 - Right. Grab him, will you? - It's all right, I can do it. 638 00:40:11,720 --> 00:40:14,160 Why isn't he strapped to the fucking chair? 639 00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:16,400 - That was your job. - Not my job, it's your job. 640 00:40:16,520 --> 00:40:19,895 Whoa, Carl. On me bloody hand. 641 00:40:19,920 --> 00:40:22,176 - Fucking hell, fucking splash back. - Get off. Get off. 642 00:40:22,200 --> 00:40:24,120 Me new jeans, you pillock. 643 00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:26,640 I despair, fucking despair in there. Where's Dylan? 644 00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:29,640 Dildo, can you text your bird and find out where she is. 645 00:40:29,800 --> 00:40:32,280 We need to get the fuck out of her, dude. 646 00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:36,360 It definitely looks like a sex thing. 647 00:40:36,480 --> 00:40:38,620 What are you so happy about? 648 00:40:39,080 --> 00:40:40,260 Come. 649 00:40:44,080 --> 00:40:45,180 How do? 650 00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:51,820 You're going to have a lovely long sleep, 651 00:40:52,460 --> 00:40:56,615 and when you wake up you're going to feel wonderfully refreshed, 652 00:40:56,640 --> 00:41:01,100 and unable to remember anything from the last 24 hours. 653 00:41:01,580 --> 00:41:05,740 Counting back now from ten. Nine. 654 00:41:06,820 --> 00:41:10,220 Eight. You did bum a dog. 655 00:41:10,340 --> 00:41:13,380 Seven. Six. 656 00:41:14,300 --> 00:41:15,900 It were a poodle. 657 00:41:16,940 --> 00:41:19,900 Five. Four. 658 00:41:20,020 --> 00:41:22,500 Three. Two. 659 00:41:23,260 --> 00:41:24,260 One. 660 00:41:34,500 --> 00:41:36,460 Thank you. Thank you. 661 00:41:36,620 --> 00:41:38,900 - You are a bloody lifesaver, man. - Thank you. 662 00:41:40,540 --> 00:41:42,500 - Namaste. - Namaste. 663 00:41:45,180 --> 00:41:49,440 - Christ. - What a ledge. - He's a bloody lunatic. 664 00:41:51,860 --> 00:41:55,460 Hell, we fucking did it. All right, come on, come on, come on. Come on! 665 00:41:55,580 --> 00:41:58,660 Where's our Dylan? Dildo! 666 00:41:59,900 --> 00:42:03,480 - Dildo! - Wait, where's Ronnie? 667 00:42:05,980 --> 00:42:08,140 - What's he doing? - Adios dickheads, 668 00:42:08,300 --> 00:42:10,820 it's been a pleasure. Erin, I love you. 669 00:42:15,860 --> 00:42:17,820 Pump the brakes! 670 00:42:47,420 --> 00:42:48,980 What a cracking night! 671 00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:51,000 (corrections: certan)