1 00:00:00,100 --> 00:00:02,380 ♪ VAUGHAN WILLIAMS: The Lark Ascending 2 00:00:05,340 --> 00:00:07,340 MAN: We'll find somewhere. 3 00:00:09,540 --> 00:00:11,180 Here? 4 00:00:12,940 --> 00:00:14,540 There. 5 00:00:24,220 --> 00:00:27,820 You say goodbye to Goldie. I'll start preparing the grave. 6 00:00:32,700 --> 00:00:34,420 What do you want to say? 7 00:00:34,460 --> 00:00:38,660 I'm sorry, Goldie, I put you in the bath with all the bubbles. 8 00:00:43,660 --> 00:00:45,260 (GASPS) 9 00:00:45,300 --> 00:00:47,900 Get the children away. (SCREAMS) 10 00:00:47,940 --> 00:00:49,940 Get the children away! 11 00:00:58,020 --> 00:00:59,620 (FUNKY MUSIC) 12 00:00:59,660 --> 00:01:01,660 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) Come in. 13 00:01:01,700 --> 00:01:03,300 (DOOR OPENS) 14 00:01:07,780 --> 00:01:09,380 So, what can I help you with today? 15 00:01:09,420 --> 00:01:11,820 Doctor, you know it's, er, rather embarrassing. 16 00:01:11,860 --> 00:01:14,500 You can share whatever you like. Well, you know... 17 00:01:14,540 --> 00:01:19,220 Doctor, it's erm... It's during, you know like, er, like sex. 18 00:01:19,260 --> 00:01:22,140 I just, er, I find I just... I just can't orgasm... 19 00:01:22,180 --> 00:01:25,980 No matter who the man is or no matter how big he is... 20 00:01:26,020 --> 00:01:28,420 I see. 21 00:01:34,060 --> 00:01:35,700 (GROANING) 22 00:01:35,740 --> 00:01:38,260 ♪ BARRETT STRONG: Money (That's What I Want) 23 00:01:44,340 --> 00:01:46,780 CARDI: Vin, I need to talk to you. Can it wait, mate? 24 00:01:46,820 --> 00:01:51,220 I've turned up at JJ's with some nicked wheels. It's quite important. 25 00:01:51,260 --> 00:01:55,060 Yeah, all right, listen, let me... Let me see you at the party. 26 00:01:55,100 --> 00:01:57,580 I'll chat to you then. Yeah, all right, bye. Bye. 27 00:01:57,620 --> 00:01:59,220 40. 28 00:01:59,260 --> 00:02:01,980 What's going on here? You all right, JJ? Yeah. 29 00:02:02,020 --> 00:02:03,820 Blood's just rushing a bit now. 30 00:02:03,860 --> 00:02:05,580 Er... 31 00:02:05,620 --> 00:02:07,420 This is my cousin Sarim. 32 00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:09,060 You all right, Sarim? 33 00:02:09,100 --> 00:02:10,740 Yeah, all right. Who are you? 34 00:02:10,780 --> 00:02:12,460 I'm Vinnie, I'm JJ's mate. 35 00:02:12,500 --> 00:02:14,100 50. 36 00:02:14,140 --> 00:02:16,140 Going a bit thin on top there, Vinnie. 37 00:02:16,180 --> 00:02:19,100 Yeah, sign of virility, apparently. That's bollocks, that is. 38 00:02:19,140 --> 00:02:22,380 Got to be a minute, now. Look at Samson, in your Bible, 39 00:02:22,420 --> 00:02:25,060 cut all his hair off, lost his strength. 40 00:02:25,100 --> 00:02:28,180 Yeah, I know but, I don't take the Bible literally though, you know, 41 00:02:28,220 --> 00:02:30,940 what with Noah and all them animals. It's gotta be a minute. 42 00:02:30,980 --> 00:02:33,580 What you saying? You don't believe in your own holy book? 43 00:02:33,620 --> 00:02:36,540 I think it's all a bit far-fetched for me, you know what I mean? 44 00:02:36,580 --> 00:02:39,220 Mind you, fucking all are, aren't they? Quran, Torah... 45 00:02:39,260 --> 00:02:40,860 What!(GRUNTS) 46 00:02:40,900 --> 00:02:43,300 Shit! You slagging our book? 47 00:02:43,340 --> 00:02:46,540 No, man, I'm... JJ, are you all right, love? What you saying, huh? 48 00:02:46,580 --> 00:02:49,580 I'm just saying some of the stories are just a bit far-fetched. 49 00:02:49,620 --> 00:02:51,460 This a fucking friend of yours? Sarim. 50 00:02:51,500 --> 00:02:54,220 Don't Sarim me, you come here with your fucking slaphead 51 00:02:54,260 --> 00:02:57,300 and you starts slagging our book - I'm not slagging your book off. 52 00:02:57,340 --> 00:02:59,420 Sarim. Don't Sarim me. Dude, calm down. 53 00:02:59,460 --> 00:03:01,860 Stop dude-ing me, you fucking twat.OK. 54 00:03:01,900 --> 00:03:04,300 All right? You fucking bald prick. 55 00:03:05,500 --> 00:03:07,100 Car, tomorrow.Yeah. 56 00:03:07,140 --> 00:03:09,420 And I told you I could hold you up for a minute. 57 00:03:09,460 --> 00:03:11,260 Yes, you did.Yeah. 58 00:03:11,300 --> 00:03:14,820 What an incredible bell-end. 59 00:03:16,660 --> 00:03:18,580 Fucking handsome though, ain't he, eh? 60 00:03:18,620 --> 00:03:20,980 This is how he's treated me, my whole fucking life. 61 00:03:21,020 --> 00:03:23,660 He goes, "I can hold you upside-down for a minute," 62 00:03:23,700 --> 00:03:25,300 then he bloody goes and does it. 63 00:03:25,340 --> 00:03:27,620 Now I've got to fix his fucking white car 64 00:03:27,660 --> 00:03:29,300 for his stupid flash wedding. 65 00:03:29,340 --> 00:03:31,620 Wedding? Someone's marrying him? Yeah. 66 00:03:31,660 --> 00:03:33,260 Danika. 67 00:03:33,300 --> 00:03:35,500 She's just as bad as he is. 68 00:03:36,660 --> 00:03:39,260 They used to take the piss out of me, because I was fat. 69 00:03:39,300 --> 00:03:42,300 Fatty.No.You fat fucker! 70 00:03:42,380 --> 00:03:45,780 Come here. Don't get worked up. (SNIFFLES)No, no, no, come on. 71 00:03:45,820 --> 00:03:47,820 Don't let him do that. It's all right. 72 00:03:47,860 --> 00:03:49,820 It's all right, man. 73 00:03:49,860 --> 00:03:51,820 You know what? 74 00:03:51,860 --> 00:03:53,620 All I ever wanted was revenge on him. 75 00:03:53,660 --> 00:03:57,740 Now I've gotta buy them a fucking gift for the their wedding. He's just a bully. 76 00:03:59,780 --> 00:04:01,780 Let's go and have a brew. Come on. 77 00:04:02,580 --> 00:04:05,180 ♪ And you put your left leg in 78 00:04:05,220 --> 00:04:07,220 ♪ Your left leg out 79 00:04:07,260 --> 00:04:10,980 ♪ In, out, in, out, you shake it all about 80 00:04:11,020 --> 00:04:15,300 ♪ You do the hokey cokey and you turn around 81 00:04:15,340 --> 00:04:19,340 ♪ That's what it's all about... (COUGHS) Hey! 82 00:04:19,380 --> 00:04:22,860 He's bloody useless, isn't he? How did we persuade him to do this? 83 00:04:22,900 --> 00:04:25,260 It's what he does now. He's packed the circus in. 84 00:04:25,300 --> 00:04:28,780 Apparently set up on his own. He's calling himself Maurice Bojangles. 85 00:04:28,820 --> 00:04:31,460 ♪ Hey, the hokey... (COUGHS) ...cokey ♪ 86 00:04:31,500 --> 00:04:35,020 Has he been drinking? He's sweating like a necrophiliac at a funeral. 87 00:04:35,060 --> 00:04:37,540 Oi, dude, can... Can we talk? Let me roll this spliff. 88 00:04:37,580 --> 00:04:39,580 I'll come and have a chat with you. 89 00:04:39,620 --> 00:04:42,740 More beer, lads? No.No. You're all right thanks, love. 90 00:04:42,780 --> 00:04:45,380 So, go on, then, what have you got Tyler? 91 00:04:45,420 --> 00:04:47,020 Oh, er... 92 00:04:48,940 --> 00:04:51,420 Just... Just my rabbit. 93 00:04:51,460 --> 00:04:54,100 What? Is there a rabbit in there? Yeah. It can breathe. 94 00:04:54,140 --> 00:04:56,140 In here? Oh, my God. 95 00:04:56,180 --> 00:04:59,580 (LAUGHS)Don't tilt it. What? Aren't you not gonna miss it? 96 00:04:59,620 --> 00:05:01,620 ♪ CARPENTERS: Close To You 97 00:05:04,220 --> 00:05:06,540 No, no, we don't get on. 98 00:05:06,580 --> 00:05:08,940 Go on, just... Now, so we've got it, yeah? Yeah. 99 00:05:08,980 --> 00:05:11,860 All right, thanks, Vin. All right. Who wants a banana? 100 00:05:11,900 --> 00:05:14,220 (BOOING)Get off! 101 00:05:14,260 --> 00:05:16,260 (JEERING) 102 00:05:16,300 --> 00:05:18,740 Hey! Get off! Give me my nose back and sit down. 103 00:05:18,780 --> 00:05:21,180 So how's things going on with you and Erin? Er, yeah. 104 00:05:21,220 --> 00:05:24,500 Yeah, we're taking it slow. You know, we don't wanna confuse Tyler. 105 00:05:24,540 --> 00:05:27,220 Yeah. What about Sara? 106 00:05:27,260 --> 00:05:30,740 Er, yeah. No, I had a chat with her yesterday. 107 00:05:31,780 --> 00:05:35,500 It was fine... Fine? Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you know... 108 00:05:35,540 --> 00:05:37,940 She's a great girl and I feel fucking terrible. 109 00:05:37,980 --> 00:05:40,260 Vin? Sorry, lad. Yeah, come on. 110 00:05:40,300 --> 00:05:42,420 Let's go and have a chat. 111 00:05:42,460 --> 00:05:45,140 Right, what's in the magic hat? Let's have a look. 112 00:05:45,180 --> 00:05:47,180 Ooh, that's not supposed to happen. 113 00:05:47,220 --> 00:05:49,020 Ooh, what's this? 114 00:05:49,060 --> 00:05:52,220 Look at this! You're just pulling it out of your sleeve! Sh! 115 00:05:52,260 --> 00:05:55,300 I'm not pulling it out my sleeve. There's nothing up me sleeve. 116 00:05:55,340 --> 00:05:58,740 The other sleeve.No. No. There's nothing in my other sleeve. 117 00:05:58,780 --> 00:06:02,020 You shush.(INDISTINCT CHATTER) Oh, look, it's Ricky the Raccoon. 118 00:06:02,060 --> 00:06:05,100 Do you want to stroke him? Boring! No, it's not boring. Boring! 119 00:06:05,140 --> 00:06:06,820 I've been doing a lot of thinking. 120 00:06:07,860 --> 00:06:13,020 ..er, about her... and, er, the-the way she is with me. 121 00:06:13,060 --> 00:06:16,140 And, erm, you know, I know 122 00:06:16,180 --> 00:06:20,860 sh-sh-sh-she made that porno, 123 00:06:20,900 --> 00:06:23,180 but it was a long time ago. 124 00:06:23,220 --> 00:06:25,220 We've all done stupid stuff in t'past. 125 00:06:25,260 --> 00:06:29,780 Do you remember that wanking contest? I do, yeah. Not fondly. 126 00:06:29,820 --> 00:06:35,140 Yeah, but you know, no matter how-how much I watch it... 127 00:06:36,780 --> 00:06:40,100 ..it doesn't change anything, be-because 128 00:06:40,140 --> 00:06:45,300 I've never felt this way before about-about anyone. 129 00:06:45,340 --> 00:06:50,540 And I'm s-scared because, you know, 130 00:06:50,580 --> 00:06:55,340 I know I can be useless and I'm a bit fat and you know, I let people down... 131 00:06:55,380 --> 00:06:58,820 but I, I really fucking love her man. 132 00:06:58,860 --> 00:07:01,300 And I need her, 133 00:07:01,340 --> 00:07:03,780 you know to be with me, 134 00:07:03,820 --> 00:07:10,460 and-and I just always want her to be in my life. 135 00:07:10,500 --> 00:07:12,180 So... 136 00:07:14,380 --> 00:07:16,380 I, erm... 137 00:07:16,420 --> 00:07:18,140 I got this. 138 00:07:18,180 --> 00:07:19,820 No way. 139 00:07:19,860 --> 00:07:22,060 Are you gonna ask her? Yeah, well... 140 00:07:22,100 --> 00:07:24,460 What do you think? Yeah, fucking definitely. 141 00:07:24,500 --> 00:07:26,140 Definitely do that. 142 00:07:27,300 --> 00:07:29,860 W-Will she say yes? Course she's gonna fucking say yes. 143 00:07:29,900 --> 00:07:32,180 Course she's gonna say yeah. Listen to me. 144 00:07:35,820 --> 00:07:38,100 I'm really proud of you, all right. 145 00:07:38,140 --> 00:07:40,340 That's a fucking big decision. 146 00:07:43,700 --> 00:07:45,700 If she says yes -Hm? 147 00:07:45,740 --> 00:07:48,980 ..will you help me sort out a wedding? 148 00:07:49,020 --> 00:07:53,020 It don't have to be much, it's just like a fucking vicar and takeaway. 149 00:07:53,060 --> 00:07:56,940 If my mate Cardi wants to get married, 150 00:07:56,980 --> 00:07:58,780 and have a fucking party, 151 00:07:58,820 --> 00:08:01,420 it's gonna be the biggest one I can possibly think of. 152 00:08:01,460 --> 00:08:03,980 I promise you, I love you so much, man. All right? 153 00:08:05,500 --> 00:08:07,500 All right, well, go and ask her, then. 154 00:08:09,940 --> 00:08:13,300 What? Now? Well, why not? No. 155 00:08:13,340 --> 00:08:16,260 No.What the fuck? You've got the ring! No, but I... Go and do it. 156 00:08:16,300 --> 00:08:18,580 Don't think about shit, just get it done. 157 00:08:18,620 --> 00:08:20,620 That's what I'd do. 158 00:08:21,740 --> 00:08:23,740 Just go and get it done. 159 00:08:25,140 --> 00:08:26,940 (CHUCKLES) Go on. 160 00:08:26,980 --> 00:08:28,700 Sod off. 161 00:08:28,740 --> 00:08:30,420 All right. Good lad. 162 00:08:30,460 --> 00:08:34,580 Give us another one there, Maurice. Don't. Don't egg him on. 163 00:08:34,620 --> 00:08:37,420 Don't egg him on. There's nothing in the magic hat. 164 00:08:37,460 --> 00:08:39,140 Give it here!(LAUGHTER)Come on. 165 00:08:39,180 --> 00:08:42,220 Give it here, Specky. Kids! Give it here, lad. I'm doing the cake. 166 00:08:42,260 --> 00:08:43,860 Give me my fucking hat back, 167 00:08:43,900 --> 00:08:46,500 you shower of shit bunch of little cunts! 168 00:08:46,540 --> 00:08:49,020 Right, come on. Stop pushing me. 169 00:08:49,060 --> 00:08:51,940 Get off! Stupid fat man! 170 00:08:51,980 --> 00:08:54,180 Leave me alone. I don't like it. 171 00:08:54,540 --> 00:08:57,340 (HORN TOOTING) Oh, for God's sake. 172 00:08:57,380 --> 00:09:00,020 Sorry, kids, move out of the way. Right, get up. 173 00:09:00,060 --> 00:09:01,740 (CHILD CRYING)Dylan! 174 00:09:01,780 --> 00:09:04,020 Here. Oh, my God. Now get him out. 175 00:09:04,060 --> 00:09:07,140 Get him out. Someone spiked me. He's all right. Someone spiked me. 176 00:09:07,180 --> 00:09:09,300 You absolutely stink. I've broke me nose. 177 00:09:09,340 --> 00:09:11,020 Check that out. 178 00:09:13,540 --> 00:09:15,260 Is he proposing? Mmm. 179 00:09:15,300 --> 00:09:17,500 Oh, shit man, that is massive. 180 00:09:24,380 --> 00:09:27,900 How do you fancy giving them two love birds the best present ever? 181 00:09:29,460 --> 00:09:31,460 Your cousin's wedding. 182 00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:40,380 OK, listen up, cos there's a lot to take in. 183 00:09:40,420 --> 00:09:42,980 This is my bell-end of a cousin Sarim, 184 00:09:43,020 --> 00:09:45,420 and this is the dickhead he's marrying - Danika. 185 00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:48,380 She's a Hindu girl. Her family want a traditional wedding, 186 00:09:48,420 --> 00:09:50,580 which means it is gonna be massive. 187 00:09:50,620 --> 00:09:53,300 Guys, we are talking flashy as fuck! It looks amazing. 188 00:09:53,340 --> 00:09:56,060 Hey, why don't you join in? Double wedding. Piss off. 189 00:09:56,100 --> 00:09:58,700 No, you do right, mate, it's a prison. Ring on your finger 190 00:09:58,740 --> 00:10:01,180 and before you know it you're shuffling round Ikea 191 00:10:01,220 --> 00:10:03,260 asking for permission to see your own mates. 192 00:10:03,300 --> 00:10:04,980 No flirting, no spontaneous sex, 193 00:10:05,020 --> 00:10:07,100 not a fucking rat in hell's chance of any anal. 194 00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:09,940 All in the misguided pursuit of companionship. 195 00:10:12,820 --> 00:10:14,420 Stag do'll be fun though.Great. 196 00:10:14,460 --> 00:10:16,060 (LAUGHTER)Right, anyway. 197 00:10:16,100 --> 00:10:18,820 These guys are gonna have everything we need OK, 198 00:10:18,860 --> 00:10:21,300 beautiful drapes, wedding dressing, cutlery... 199 00:10:21,340 --> 00:10:23,260 You name it, this whole room is gonna be 200 00:10:23,300 --> 00:10:26,180 all the colours of the bloody rainbows, guys.Excellent. 201 00:10:26,220 --> 00:10:28,380 The gifts, yeah, we're talking gold, 202 00:10:28,420 --> 00:10:31,740 we're talking frankincense, even bloody myrrh's gonna be turning up. 203 00:10:31,780 --> 00:10:34,100 Sounds amazing. I feel bad for stealing it. 204 00:10:34,140 --> 00:10:36,820 Yeah, well, don't, because this guy... dickhead. 205 00:10:36,860 --> 00:10:38,980 Won't there be 200 people there? Exactly. 206 00:10:39,020 --> 00:10:42,020 Which is why we need the knowledge of our inside man. Go on, JJ. 207 00:10:42,060 --> 00:10:45,260 To my mind, there's only one perfect time to do the hit, 208 00:10:45,300 --> 00:10:46,900 and that is the Baraat. The what? 209 00:10:46,940 --> 00:10:50,020 The Baraat. It is the groom's wedding procession in to the venue. 210 00:10:50,060 --> 00:10:54,300 It's about half an hour long, sometimes they come in a flashy motor or a white horse. 211 00:10:54,340 --> 00:10:57,220 Knowing this dickhead, a white horse. Procession starts. 212 00:10:57,260 --> 00:11:00,700 It's gonna weave its way down these country roads, to the wedding venue. 213 00:11:00,740 --> 00:11:03,660 The room's gonna be set up, and the wedding breakfast prepared. 214 00:11:03,700 --> 00:11:06,380 So how do we get it out? Yeah, all right so, 215 00:11:06,420 --> 00:11:08,500 There's a shit load of moving parts here. 216 00:11:08,540 --> 00:11:11,460 We need to create a distraction That draws everybody out 217 00:11:11,500 --> 00:11:15,020 and it allows us to enter there, look.15 minutes to smash and grab. 218 00:11:15,060 --> 00:11:17,980 It's a big fucking job, guys, we all need to be on our A-game. 219 00:11:18,020 --> 00:11:21,820 That's right, cos this isn't just for money, it's for love, all right? 220 00:11:21,860 --> 00:11:23,660 It's for Carol and Cardi. 221 00:11:23,700 --> 00:11:25,940 Hey, to Carol and Cardi, eh. 222 00:11:25,980 --> 00:11:28,380 ALL: Carol and Cardi. 223 00:11:28,420 --> 00:11:30,420 (PHONE RINGS) 224 00:11:31,980 --> 00:11:34,580 Shit. Hello. 225 00:11:34,620 --> 00:11:37,340 Get yourself over to the office now 226 00:11:37,380 --> 00:11:39,620 and don't tell anyone you're coming. 227 00:11:42,260 --> 00:11:44,060 That's not good. 228 00:12:03,780 --> 00:12:05,780 They've found his body. 229 00:12:05,820 --> 00:12:07,500 Tony Tillerton. 230 00:12:09,580 --> 00:12:11,180 Just his body. 231 00:12:11,220 --> 00:12:13,100 No head. 232 00:12:14,060 --> 00:12:15,700 Right. You've fucked me, Vin. 233 00:12:15,740 --> 00:12:19,420 You've bent me over and fucked me up the arse 234 00:12:19,460 --> 00:12:22,700 with a massive yellow dildo.No. No, let me expl-Shut the fuck up! 235 00:12:22,740 --> 00:12:25,340 They've linked him to me. 236 00:12:25,380 --> 00:12:28,180 I got arrested in my own home, 237 00:12:28,220 --> 00:12:30,580 in front of my fucking daughters. 238 00:12:30,620 --> 00:12:33,420 And the only reason why you're not lying in a ditch right now 239 00:12:33,460 --> 00:12:36,060 is that I can't risk another dead body coming back to me. 240 00:12:36,100 --> 00:12:38,100 I'm sorry. Fuck your sorry. 241 00:12:38,140 --> 00:12:39,740 What happened? 242 00:12:39,780 --> 00:12:41,580 We went to his house. 243 00:12:41,620 --> 00:12:45,020 And-And-And he made fucking scones. 244 00:12:45,060 --> 00:12:46,660 Straight from the oven. 245 00:12:46,700 --> 00:12:48,860 And JJ shot his fucking Peacock. (GUNSHOT) 246 00:12:48,900 --> 00:12:50,700 This is Struen. 247 00:12:50,740 --> 00:12:52,900 So we-we, we get in the van... 248 00:12:53,940 --> 00:12:56,020 These fucking guys come out of nowhere... 249 00:12:56,060 --> 00:12:59,020 (INDISTINCT SHOUTING) 250 00:12:59,060 --> 00:13:00,740 So-So-So we followed 'em 251 00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:04,300 and they started fucking shooting at us, like, actually shooting. 252 00:13:04,340 --> 00:13:06,140 Fuck you! Shit! 253 00:13:06,180 --> 00:13:08,780 Got Tony out the fucking window shooting his gun off, 254 00:13:08,820 --> 00:13:11,420 next thing you know, his fucking head. (SHRIEKING) 255 00:13:11,460 --> 00:13:15,060 I-I-I mean, I mean, it was really shocking 256 00:13:15,100 --> 00:13:18,020 and I know, I know we should've told you the truth. 257 00:13:18,060 --> 00:13:20,220 But you-you said to bring him back safe, 258 00:13:20,260 --> 00:13:22,380 and there's his fucking head on the ground. 259 00:13:22,420 --> 00:13:24,940 How'd you lose the body? They-They-They'd stole it. 260 00:13:24,980 --> 00:13:27,060 They just fucked off wi' it. 261 00:13:27,100 --> 00:13:31,580 So I got a mate of ours to sew that head on to another body. 262 00:13:31,620 --> 00:13:34,660 (WHIRRING) 263 00:13:34,700 --> 00:13:37,980 I-I know, I know it sounds, it sounds fucked, 264 00:13:38,020 --> 00:13:41,940 but he's a undertaker, it's not as weird as it... 265 00:13:42,940 --> 00:13:44,540 I lied to you, man... 266 00:13:46,060 --> 00:13:47,700 ..Mister McCann, and I'm sorry. 267 00:13:50,540 --> 00:13:52,340 How fucked are we? 268 00:13:52,380 --> 00:13:56,980 They found his body in the woods, some family burying a goldfish. 269 00:13:57,020 --> 00:13:58,420 (SCREAMS) 270 00:13:58,460 --> 00:14:01,460 Police told the wife they thought it was a professional hit. 271 00:14:01,500 --> 00:14:03,660 They seized his computer. 272 00:14:03,700 --> 00:14:06,540 And all the work he did for me was encrypted, 273 00:14:06,580 --> 00:14:09,900 but the bastard was smart. 274 00:14:09,940 --> 00:14:14,620 He'd left a special file, which he'd hidden inside his own system. 275 00:14:17,620 --> 00:14:22,220 Since 2012, I have worked for a businessman, Mr Terence McCann. 276 00:14:22,260 --> 00:14:25,180 However, during this time, I became aware that 277 00:14:25,220 --> 00:14:29,860 Mr McCann is a violent, unhinged, psychotic, monster. 278 00:14:31,220 --> 00:14:32,820 That's not true. 279 00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:38,740 And when I tried to extract myself from his services, 280 00:14:38,780 --> 00:14:42,660 I became fearful for myself and for my family. 281 00:14:43,700 --> 00:14:45,380 Where's the head? 282 00:14:45,420 --> 00:14:47,100 It's gone, I cremated it. 283 00:14:47,140 --> 00:14:49,980 You'll have to destroy the van. There'll be traces. 284 00:14:50,020 --> 00:14:51,500 Done. 285 00:14:51,540 --> 00:14:54,540 They've got nothing, on me, Vin. That file won't convict me. 286 00:14:55,580 --> 00:15:00,300 So the only thing linking me to that headless fucking corpse 287 00:15:00,340 --> 00:15:02,060 is you 288 00:15:02,100 --> 00:15:03,940 and your idiot friends. 289 00:15:04,980 --> 00:15:06,700 Can you trust them? 290 00:15:06,740 --> 00:15:10,300 Can you fucking trust them? 291 00:15:10,340 --> 00:15:12,060 Yeah, yeah. 292 00:15:13,260 --> 00:15:14,980 I hope so. 293 00:15:23,780 --> 00:15:25,380 Fuck off. 294 00:15:33,460 --> 00:15:35,460 ♪ MERRY CLAYTON: Gimme Shelter 295 00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:08,500 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 296 00:16:10,340 --> 00:16:12,340 (LAUGHTER) 297 00:16:12,380 --> 00:16:14,060 Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! 298 00:16:14,100 --> 00:16:16,100 (LAUGHTER) 299 00:16:16,740 --> 00:16:18,740 All right, I'll wear this, but that's it. 300 00:16:18,780 --> 00:16:23,100 If anyone's got a chocolate cock, penis slippers or a duck with a dick, take them home. 301 00:16:23,140 --> 00:16:26,180 You lot go your way, we'll go ours, meet back here at eight, yeah. 302 00:16:26,220 --> 00:16:28,820 Aaaaah! Don't get too pissed. 303 00:16:28,860 --> 00:16:30,540 (CHEERING) 304 00:16:34,140 --> 00:16:36,740 All right, so no intentional aiming at the dick. 305 00:16:36,780 --> 00:16:38,780 If it's accidental, we'll let it go. 306 00:16:38,820 --> 00:16:42,060 Five. Four. Three. Two. One. 307 00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:43,740 Go! 308 00:16:43,780 --> 00:16:45,780 ♪ THE UNDERTONES: Teenage Kicks 309 00:17:27,620 --> 00:17:29,300 Go on! 310 00:17:59,900 --> 00:18:01,500 (LAUGHS) 311 00:18:27,460 --> 00:18:30,460 ♪ Get your rocks off, get your rocks off, honey 312 00:18:30,500 --> 00:18:32,500 ♪ Shake 'em, now-now... 313 00:18:32,540 --> 00:18:34,540 Where's my stripper? 314 00:18:34,580 --> 00:18:37,060 No can do sunshine, #MeToo. 315 00:18:37,100 --> 00:18:40,540 No hashtag. You run a s-strip club. 316 00:18:40,580 --> 00:18:43,580 I run a classy adult entertainment venue, Mate. 317 00:18:43,620 --> 00:18:46,660 I draw the line at some ropey bird with squirty cream on her tits. 318 00:18:46,700 --> 00:18:50,620 Hey, so I've got the vans sorted. I bought the coloured smoke. 319 00:18:50,660 --> 00:18:54,540 Tommo's obviously good for cop uniforms, so we're golden. 320 00:18:54,580 --> 00:18:56,300 Good. Listen, come here. 321 00:18:57,420 --> 00:18:59,420 Don't tell the others. 322 00:18:59,460 --> 00:19:02,700 Do you remember that geezer who got his head taken off? 323 00:19:02,740 --> 00:19:06,260 What geezer? For fuck... How the fuck do you not remember that? 324 00:19:06,300 --> 00:19:08,300 Hilarious. 325 00:19:08,340 --> 00:19:10,060 Really funny. 326 00:19:10,100 --> 00:19:12,900 Listen. Cops are all over it, right. 327 00:19:12,940 --> 00:19:15,820 And we can't afford any link with us and that fucking body, 328 00:19:15,860 --> 00:19:18,620 so we're gonna have to crush the rascal, you know.Shit. 329 00:19:18,660 --> 00:19:20,660 I know, man. I fucking love that van too. 330 00:19:20,700 --> 00:19:22,780 Fuck the bloody van, the cops, the body... 331 00:19:22,820 --> 00:19:26,020 I wasn't supposed to be on that fucking trip, and you dragged me into it. 332 00:19:26,060 --> 00:19:28,740 Just don't, don't start that shit again. 333 00:19:28,780 --> 00:19:31,020 I don't wanna go to prison, Vin, all right? 334 00:19:31,060 --> 00:19:33,140 Maybe we shouldn't steal this wedding, yeah. 335 00:19:33,180 --> 00:19:36,140 Maybe this is just a sign for us to just keep our heads down.Shit. 336 00:19:36,180 --> 00:19:37,900 Fucking shit.No. No. No. 337 00:19:37,940 --> 00:19:40,820 Hey, what you doing here? Come to see Dylan. 338 00:19:40,860 --> 00:19:43,460 No. No. Come on. Don't. Don't do this to yourself. 339 00:19:43,500 --> 00:19:46,100 Vinnie, I -No, no, just listen. You're gonna get upset. 340 00:19:46,140 --> 00:19:48,660 Just come and have a chat, with me. I don't wanna chat. 341 00:19:48,700 --> 00:19:50,820 But I've, I've got, I've got a spliff. 342 00:19:50,860 --> 00:19:54,500 A spliff. Go and have a smoke and a chat. Quick chat. 343 00:19:54,540 --> 00:19:56,540 You see, what you've got to understand is 344 00:19:56,580 --> 00:19:58,820 Dyl and Erin, they've been together for ever. 345 00:19:58,860 --> 00:20:00,940 I mean, we always thought they would be, 346 00:20:00,980 --> 00:20:04,060 but then the universe just went apeshit. 347 00:20:04,100 --> 00:20:07,060 I mean, split 'em apart, you know. When you look at it like that, 348 00:20:07,100 --> 00:20:09,460 you and Dyl should never really have even met. 349 00:20:09,500 --> 00:20:12,100 You shouldn't have done. I mean, fucking plumbing. 350 00:20:12,140 --> 00:20:15,460 His heart's not in plumbing, he only did that to impress Erin. 351 00:20:15,500 --> 00:20:17,500 Do you know what I mean? Right. Yeah. 352 00:20:17,540 --> 00:20:19,740 Yeah, I mean, I hear what you're saying. 353 00:20:19,780 --> 00:20:22,580 There's just one slight problem with your theoryHmm? 354 00:20:22,620 --> 00:20:24,300 It's horse shit. Is it? 355 00:20:26,420 --> 00:20:28,060 Well, go on. 356 00:20:28,100 --> 00:20:29,780 Think about it. 357 00:20:29,820 --> 00:20:33,060 All those years they were together and he never properly moved in. 358 00:20:34,100 --> 00:20:37,100 He never made any commitment that he couldn't back out of. 359 00:20:38,340 --> 00:20:42,180 I mean, if you love someone you wanna commit. 360 00:20:43,380 --> 00:20:45,380 You want them in your life 361 00:20:45,420 --> 00:20:49,820 and the thought of them not being, that fills you with, with panic... 362 00:20:49,860 --> 00:20:51,580 Hmm. Huh? 363 00:20:51,620 --> 00:20:53,620 Hmm. 364 00:20:53,660 --> 00:20:56,260 Very wise. (CHUCKLES) 365 00:20:56,300 --> 00:20:58,300 I am. 366 00:21:01,100 --> 00:21:02,700 You're young. 367 00:21:02,740 --> 00:21:04,420 Do you know what I mean? 368 00:21:05,460 --> 00:21:08,540 I mean, fucking hell. You've got your whole life ahead of you. 369 00:21:08,580 --> 00:21:10,980 Why the fuck do you want to get serious with Dyl? 370 00:21:13,820 --> 00:21:15,820 Cos I love him. 371 00:21:17,020 --> 00:21:18,700 I don't think you do. 372 00:21:19,740 --> 00:21:21,540 I do, Vinnie. 373 00:21:21,580 --> 00:21:23,380 I love him. 374 00:21:23,420 --> 00:21:25,140 Right? 375 00:21:25,180 --> 00:21:26,980 Right. I'm sorry. 376 00:21:27,020 --> 00:21:29,620 I'm sorry. I don't want your hugs, Vinnie. 377 00:21:29,660 --> 00:21:33,540 I just wanna know how, how he could do this to me? 378 00:21:34,620 --> 00:21:36,220 Is it cos of my dad? 379 00:21:37,260 --> 00:21:38,900 Your dad? 380 00:21:38,940 --> 00:21:40,940 Yeah, my dad. He's a copper. 381 00:21:43,180 --> 00:21:45,420 Has he not told you that? 382 00:21:45,460 --> 00:21:47,620 No. 383 00:21:49,020 --> 00:21:51,020 He's a copper and you're all... 384 00:21:53,220 --> 00:21:55,700 ..whatever you are... We're not anything. 385 00:21:56,700 --> 00:21:58,500 Right. 386 00:21:58,540 --> 00:22:00,340 OK. 387 00:22:04,020 --> 00:22:06,220 He has told me things, you know. Mm-hm. 388 00:22:07,260 --> 00:22:09,260 Like what? 389 00:22:10,300 --> 00:22:12,020 Like loads. 390 00:22:13,260 --> 00:22:16,660 The weed shed. The circus. 391 00:22:19,580 --> 00:22:21,380 Anything else? 392 00:22:23,420 --> 00:22:25,060 Plenty. 393 00:22:25,100 --> 00:22:27,300 I'm not pissing around, what's he told you? 394 00:22:28,380 --> 00:22:30,380 I don't know, Vin. 395 00:22:30,420 --> 00:22:32,420 Listen to me. 396 00:22:33,940 --> 00:22:36,340 You have no idea what you're dealing with here. 397 00:22:36,380 --> 00:22:38,020 Tell me what he's told you, Sara. 398 00:22:41,140 --> 00:22:42,820 Nothing. 399 00:22:42,860 --> 00:22:44,660 All right? 400 00:22:44,700 --> 00:22:46,300 Jesus. 401 00:22:48,780 --> 00:22:50,500 Don't lose your head. 402 00:22:52,340 --> 00:22:53,940 Fuck! 403 00:23:03,300 --> 00:23:05,020 I'm gonna get you up now. 404 00:23:05,060 --> 00:23:07,180 It's a special day today, Carol, am I right? 405 00:23:07,220 --> 00:23:09,220 (CHEERING) 406 00:23:09,260 --> 00:23:10,860 WOMEN: Carol! Carol! 407 00:23:10,900 --> 00:23:12,980 Carol, we are gonna rock your world, baby. 408 00:23:13,020 --> 00:23:15,020 Come on, boys. 409 00:23:15,060 --> 00:23:17,060 (CHEERING) 410 00:23:21,860 --> 00:23:24,380 Hey! Hey! What the fuck have you told Sara? 411 00:23:24,420 --> 00:23:27,220 What? You heard what I fucking... So what've you told her? 412 00:23:27,260 --> 00:23:29,900 When you've had a drink, you're a fucking blabbermouth. 413 00:23:29,940 --> 00:23:32,260 What have you said? Noth... Fucking nothing. 414 00:23:32,300 --> 00:23:35,220 I swear to God, I'll put you through the fucking wall, Dylan. 415 00:23:35,260 --> 00:23:37,380 Fucking stop that, all right! I tell you what, 416 00:23:37,420 --> 00:23:40,220 I'll rephrase it for you. Have you told her about Tillerton? 417 00:23:40,260 --> 00:23:44,260 Who? Have you told her about fucking Tillerton? The guy who got his head taken off? 418 00:23:44,300 --> 00:23:45,900 No.Oi. 419 00:23:45,940 --> 00:23:49,500 Look me in the eye and tell me you haven't told her. 420 00:23:49,540 --> 00:23:51,740 Tell me you haven't said anything, Dyl. 421 00:23:51,780 --> 00:23:54,780 I-I-I can't remember. You fucking idiot! 422 00:23:54,820 --> 00:23:56,900 Dude, it's not... You don't have to worry. 423 00:23:56,940 --> 00:23:59,020 Her fucking dad's a copper, Dyl! 424 00:23:59,060 --> 00:24:02,260 You know she's fucking heartbroken. Pissed off. 425 00:24:02,300 --> 00:24:04,860 And, right now, if she can get one over on you, 426 00:24:04,900 --> 00:24:07,100 that's exactly what she's gonna do! 427 00:24:07,140 --> 00:24:09,620 You know, all the fuck... It's all linked. 428 00:24:09,660 --> 00:24:12,860 The fucking cops know McCann's a part of that fucking murder. 429 00:24:12,900 --> 00:24:14,980 We can't have it coming back on us, Dylan. 430 00:24:16,580 --> 00:24:20,300 Oh, fuck, fuck. Christ. Shit. Oh, fuck. My heart. 431 00:24:20,340 --> 00:24:21,980 Fuck your heat, you knobhead. 432 00:24:22,020 --> 00:24:24,820 Er, what are we gonna do? I don't fucking know. 433 00:24:24,860 --> 00:24:26,940 I'll tell you what you're gonna fucking do. 434 00:24:26,980 --> 00:24:30,100 You're gonna go out there, find her and you're gonna make it right. 435 00:24:30,140 --> 00:24:32,940 How? I don't fucking know, Dylan, 436 00:24:32,980 --> 00:24:36,180 but if you don't make it right and she fucking blabs, we're fucked! 437 00:24:36,220 --> 00:24:38,660 All going to jail! No, I, er... 438 00:24:38,700 --> 00:24:41,700 No, I can't, I can't do that. What? I'm fucking back with Erin. 439 00:24:41,740 --> 00:24:44,460 What am I supposed to say to her? I don't give a fuck, Dylan. 440 00:24:44,500 --> 00:24:46,100 I don't give a fuck! 441 00:24:46,140 --> 00:24:48,340 It's your mess, go and fucking clean it. 442 00:24:49,420 --> 00:24:52,740 I swear to God, you fucking go now, else I'll fucking bury you.Right. 443 00:24:54,980 --> 00:24:56,620 Dickhead! 444 00:24:57,660 --> 00:24:59,260 Everything all right? 445 00:24:59,300 --> 00:25:01,500 ♪ DEPECHE MODE: Never Let Me Down Again 446 00:25:04,100 --> 00:25:05,900 (MUTTERS) 447 00:25:28,020 --> 00:25:30,020 (MUTTERS) 448 00:25:49,700 --> 00:25:51,300 Hey.Hey. 449 00:25:58,950 --> 00:26:01,670 ♪ THE VELVET UNDERGROUND Sunday Morning 450 00:26:07,870 --> 00:26:09,870 Dylan? 451 00:26:35,270 --> 00:26:37,270 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 452 00:26:43,470 --> 00:26:45,110 Fat fuck. 453 00:26:45,150 --> 00:26:46,790 Are you all right, Sarim? 454 00:26:46,830 --> 00:26:48,630 Er, are you nervous? 455 00:26:48,670 --> 00:26:50,990 Nervous? Nerves are for wimps. 456 00:26:51,030 --> 00:26:53,150 I've got a beautiful woman, JJ. 457 00:26:53,190 --> 00:26:56,470 She can cook, she can suck, 458 00:26:56,510 --> 00:26:59,310 goes like a train, thanks for asking. I didn't ask, actually. 459 00:26:59,350 --> 00:27:01,950 I don't want you using that image for when you're alone. 460 00:27:01,990 --> 00:27:04,070 Keep her out of here, JJ. 461 00:27:04,110 --> 00:27:05,910 She's family from today, man. 462 00:27:05,950 --> 00:27:07,950 She's not really my type actually, Sarim. 463 00:27:07,990 --> 00:27:10,310 What you saying? Nothing. She's lovely, right - 464 00:27:10,350 --> 00:27:14,270 You saying she's a munter? What? I didn't say that! Where the fuck's your bird, JJ? 465 00:27:14,310 --> 00:27:16,110 Oh, yeah, you've not got one, 466 00:27:16,150 --> 00:27:18,550 because you're a used to be fat fucking freak 467 00:27:18,590 --> 00:27:20,670 who gets his hots from hooking fish. 468 00:27:21,870 --> 00:27:23,870 Anyway, you have a nice day. 469 00:27:23,910 --> 00:27:26,110 I think we're about to start in a second. 470 00:27:30,710 --> 00:27:33,110 What a dick. Yeah, I know. 471 00:27:33,150 --> 00:27:34,950 And he's always coming at me you know, 472 00:27:34,990 --> 00:27:38,790 and none of you lot say anything. OK, let's go and get married. 473 00:27:38,830 --> 00:27:40,830 (CHEERING) 474 00:27:44,430 --> 00:27:47,670 (SIGHS) Right, get in positions. 475 00:27:47,710 --> 00:27:51,070 The baraat's getting started. (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 476 00:27:51,110 --> 00:27:53,110 Jacklapatty right back at you, dude. 477 00:27:53,150 --> 00:27:57,630 I'm assuming that's good luck, mind you, he could be telling me to fuck myself. Right, we're on. 478 00:27:57,670 --> 00:27:59,990 You ready, yeah? Ready like Eddie. 479 00:28:00,030 --> 00:28:02,630 Who's Eddie? Bloke I used to know. 480 00:28:02,670 --> 00:28:04,670 Very attractive wife. 481 00:28:04,710 --> 00:28:06,310 Surprisingly supple. 482 00:28:06,350 --> 00:28:08,830 Still no word from Dyl? No. No word. 483 00:28:09,990 --> 00:28:11,590 (CHEERING) 484 00:28:12,630 --> 00:28:15,830 ♪ SIDHU MOOSE WALA, MIST BANGLEZ FEAT. STEFFLON DON: 47 485 00:28:37,310 --> 00:28:38,990 You ready, Jimbo? 486 00:28:39,030 --> 00:28:40,630 Oh, I was born ready. 487 00:28:40,670 --> 00:28:42,270 I tell you what, Vin. What? 488 00:28:42,310 --> 00:28:45,990 If this all goes tits up, I'm telling 'em that you coerced me. 489 00:28:46,030 --> 00:28:49,190 Yeah? I'm gonna land all the shit at your door - 490 00:28:49,230 --> 00:28:51,510 All right... and plead early dementia. 491 00:28:51,550 --> 00:28:54,270 That'd be an easy sell, wouldn't it? You silly old cunt. 492 00:28:54,310 --> 00:28:56,910 Well, fuck off. Are you two sorted and all? 493 00:28:56,950 --> 00:29:00,270 Grand, yeah.Sick.Right, do you wanna be good cop or bad cop? 494 00:29:00,310 --> 00:29:03,590 I want to be "Let's get this done quick and not fuck it up" cop. 495 00:29:03,630 --> 00:29:05,630 What am I supposed to do with that? 496 00:29:06,950 --> 00:29:08,750 Tuck it in. 497 00:29:08,790 --> 00:29:11,110 So I'll be in a nursing home getting pampered, 498 00:29:11,150 --> 00:29:13,350 while you'll be in Broadmoor getting bummed. 499 00:29:13,390 --> 00:29:15,110 Will you just fuck off? 500 00:29:15,150 --> 00:29:16,830 Christ! 501 00:29:16,870 --> 00:29:18,670 Sorry I'm late. 502 00:29:18,710 --> 00:29:21,430 Where have you been? Oh, I just got wasted. Had to go home. 503 00:29:21,470 --> 00:29:24,470 Got hammered didn't you? I puked and then passed out. 504 00:29:24,510 --> 00:29:26,750 Go and get your high-vis out, right. Sorry. 505 00:29:26,790 --> 00:29:28,870 Dyl? Yeah. 506 00:29:28,910 --> 00:29:30,710 Is it sorted? 507 00:29:30,750 --> 00:29:32,350 Sorted. 508 00:29:33,390 --> 00:29:35,390 (RINGING) 509 00:29:47,910 --> 00:29:50,310 Hi there. Where's your boss? In the back. 510 00:29:50,350 --> 00:29:52,750 ♪ SEEDHE MAUT Shaktimaan 511 00:29:55,030 --> 00:29:57,030 That's not clean. 512 00:30:01,550 --> 00:30:03,550 Thank you. 513 00:30:05,630 --> 00:30:08,030 Gentlemen, riddle me this. 514 00:30:08,070 --> 00:30:10,150 Who's in charge here? 515 00:30:11,270 --> 00:30:12,910 Paulo. He's in the bathroom. 516 00:30:12,950 --> 00:30:15,510 Well, how long will he be? 517 00:30:15,550 --> 00:30:17,190 Not sure. 518 00:30:17,230 --> 00:30:21,150 Has he been long already? Will he be opening his bowel? 519 00:30:21,190 --> 00:30:23,390 I'm not sure. I don't really know, I just... 520 00:30:23,430 --> 00:30:26,510 Well, listen up. There's been a very serious threat on the hotel. 521 00:30:26,550 --> 00:30:29,350 We need you and you to file out into the car park. 522 00:30:29,390 --> 00:30:32,470 Right out on to the restaurant there, please. There you goes. 523 00:30:32,510 --> 00:30:34,510 Get you! Go. 524 00:30:36,310 --> 00:30:38,110 Paulo! 525 00:30:40,590 --> 00:30:42,310 I bet it's a shit. 526 00:30:42,350 --> 00:30:44,350 (DRUMMING CONTINUES) 527 00:30:50,030 --> 00:30:52,030 (CHEERING) 528 00:31:02,310 --> 00:31:05,630 (SIREN RINGTONE) JJ: Jim, it's show time. 529 00:31:05,670 --> 00:31:07,270 Fucking right. 530 00:31:08,390 --> 00:31:11,390 Attaboy. Come on. Come to Daddy. 531 00:31:11,430 --> 00:31:13,430 Cheers! 532 00:31:17,550 --> 00:31:21,150 Aw! God! Oh, my God! 533 00:31:21,190 --> 00:31:24,390 Oi. Stop being in awe. Come on, we've got to steal some shit. 534 00:31:24,430 --> 00:31:26,710 Pretty sure this is it. Pretty sure? 535 00:31:26,750 --> 00:31:28,830 Yeah, like, 40 percent. 536 00:31:28,870 --> 00:31:30,870 40 percent's good. 537 00:31:33,670 --> 00:31:35,470 (GASPS)Fucking hell. 538 00:31:35,510 --> 00:31:37,110 I'm jealous. Me too. 539 00:31:37,150 --> 00:31:40,830 Right, that's it, if I ever get married, I'm marrying an Indian. 540 00:31:40,870 --> 00:31:42,870 ♪ BRONCHO: Class Historian 541 00:31:59,350 --> 00:32:01,430 Thank you. Form a nice straight line here 542 00:32:01,470 --> 00:32:03,710 and stay well away from the building, please. 543 00:32:03,750 --> 00:32:05,350 What the fuck?(Shit.) 544 00:32:05,390 --> 00:32:07,590 What? I know him. 545 00:32:07,630 --> 00:32:09,630 What? I've spanked him. 546 00:32:09,670 --> 00:32:12,470 Take over. Excuse me, sir, are you the manager here? 547 00:32:12,510 --> 00:32:16,070 Yes, and I have a wedding to prepare. 548 00:32:16,110 --> 00:32:18,910 Why are my staff not in the fucking kitchen? 549 00:32:18,950 --> 00:32:20,750 There's been a bomb threat, OK, 550 00:32:20,790 --> 00:32:23,670 so we've had to excavate the building -A bomb threat? Yeah. 551 00:32:23,710 --> 00:32:26,670 On a remote manor house? That's what we were told, yeah. 552 00:32:26,710 --> 00:32:29,590 No.So were taking it very serious. This is bullshit. OK. 553 00:32:29,630 --> 00:32:31,630 Look - Mumbai ragda patties. 554 00:32:31,670 --> 00:32:33,310 Dahi Puri. 555 00:32:33,350 --> 00:32:35,430 Bomb? No. 556 00:32:35,470 --> 00:32:38,070 Right. I don't see one. I understand. Oh, is that it? 557 00:32:38,110 --> 00:32:40,190 No, it's Khakhra roll. 558 00:32:40,230 --> 00:32:41,830 Ah! Bomb? 559 00:32:41,870 --> 00:32:44,270 No, it's Masala Vada. Or this? 560 00:32:44,310 --> 00:32:47,110 I understand. Bomb? No. Cocktail fucking Kachori. 561 00:32:47,150 --> 00:32:50,030 Sir, I understand, but we have to take this seriously, 562 00:32:50,070 --> 00:32:52,150 so could you please es-cavate the building. 563 00:32:52,190 --> 00:32:54,190 What the hell is he doing? 564 00:32:54,230 --> 00:32:56,550 He's patrolling for bombs. 565 00:32:58,990 --> 00:33:01,070 Excuse me. Sir. Hey, you! 566 00:33:01,110 --> 00:33:03,790 You! I want to talk to you. 567 00:33:05,470 --> 00:33:07,070 Who, me? 568 00:33:07,110 --> 00:33:09,750 Tommo? Er, Paulo. 569 00:33:09,790 --> 00:33:11,790 (CHUCKLES) Good to see you, mate. 570 00:33:11,830 --> 00:33:14,230 What a lovely surprise. What the fuck? 571 00:33:14,270 --> 00:33:16,950 Yes, er, I'm a policeman now. 572 00:33:16,990 --> 00:33:19,030 Since when? 573 00:33:19,070 --> 00:33:23,550 Well, recently. I was training up in Hendon. 574 00:33:23,590 --> 00:33:26,390 I heard you were running The Rat And Cutter. 575 00:33:26,430 --> 00:33:29,190 (LAUGHS) It's, er... That's rumours, mate. 576 00:33:29,230 --> 00:33:31,230 It's quite serious this, the bomb threat. 577 00:33:31,270 --> 00:33:34,670 Yeah, yeah, actually, they used a code word and everything, so... 578 00:33:34,710 --> 00:33:40,350 And they didn't bring the bomb squad? Just you two. 579 00:33:40,390 --> 00:33:43,790 Cutbacks, innit, you know. It's... It's criminal, really. 580 00:33:43,830 --> 00:33:46,150 (LAUGHS) Ironically. 581 00:33:46,190 --> 00:33:48,270 No, it's serious though isn't it? 582 00:33:49,630 --> 00:33:54,030 I'm calling the police. Paolo - No, no, we are the police. 583 00:33:54,070 --> 00:33:56,790 You don't have to call them. Bullshit, Tommo, OK. 584 00:33:56,830 --> 00:34:00,230 You made a lemon sorbet from my cum. 585 00:34:00,270 --> 00:34:02,670 You're not a policeman now. (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 586 00:34:02,710 --> 00:34:04,710 Paulo, the sorbet days are behind me. 587 00:34:04,750 --> 00:34:07,590 And-And you're too fucking small. 588 00:34:07,630 --> 00:34:10,030 ♪ MISSY ELLIOTT: Get Your Freak On Hello. Police. 589 00:34:10,070 --> 00:34:12,590 There's imposters at the Thornfield Manor. 590 00:34:28,030 --> 00:34:29,830 What the fuck? 591 00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:37,440 No. No. No. No. You go. You just go. You go. 592 00:34:37,480 --> 00:34:39,160 Erin.(SCREAMS) 593 00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:41,200 Go, go, go. You go. Go! 594 00:34:41,240 --> 00:34:44,560 Now. Now. Just settle down. Just... 595 00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:46,600 (SHRIEKS) 596 00:34:54,520 --> 00:34:57,320 Fuck. (MUTTERS) 597 00:34:57,360 --> 00:34:59,360 (GRUNTS) 598 00:35:03,280 --> 00:35:05,520 Vin - Vin. 599 00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:08,360 We have to go. We have to go. The cops are coming. 600 00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:11,240 Fuck. Why? The head chef, he recognised Tommo. 601 00:35:11,280 --> 00:35:12,960 Where...? Where the fuck from? 602 00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:14,600 They made jizz puddings together. 603 00:35:14,640 --> 00:35:16,640 Course they fucking have, haven't you? 604 00:35:16,680 --> 00:35:19,320 They're on their way. Go and nick the rest of the shit. 605 00:35:19,360 --> 00:35:22,560 I'm gonna tie her up. I'll tie her up. I'll tie her. 606 00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:24,600 ♪ SLAVES: Magnolia 607 00:35:42,240 --> 00:35:43,840 Ooh! Have that! 608 00:35:43,880 --> 00:35:45,680 Have that! 609 00:35:47,240 --> 00:35:49,240 (SCREAMING) 610 00:35:56,280 --> 00:35:58,280 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 611 00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:09,160 (NEIGHING) 612 00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:11,480 Argh! 613 00:36:12,760 --> 00:36:14,760 Sarim. Sarim. 614 00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:18,000 Oh, man, you shoulder it looks dislocated. Here I'll fix it. 615 00:36:18,040 --> 00:36:21,040 Anley, keep your hand on his shoulder, no matter what he says. 616 00:36:21,080 --> 00:36:22,880 Don't lift it up. 617 00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:27,240 Quick! 618 00:36:32,320 --> 00:36:34,800 Come on, Vinnie! Get in the car! 619 00:36:34,840 --> 00:36:36,640 Come on! 620 00:36:36,680 --> 00:36:38,480 Faster! Just fucking go! 621 00:36:49,560 --> 00:36:51,200 SUGAR: There's Jim, slow down! 622 00:36:55,040 --> 00:36:56,680 What took you? 623 00:36:56,720 --> 00:36:59,000 Only a fucking woman would say that. 624 00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:02,080 You see, this is why I've never got wed. 625 00:37:02,120 --> 00:37:04,320 Shit like this. Is that the only reason? 626 00:37:04,360 --> 00:37:07,320 Hey, I've had plenty of offers love. 627 00:37:07,360 --> 00:37:09,360 ♪ STEVIE WONDER: My Cherie Amour 628 00:37:45,080 --> 00:37:46,720 You all right, love? 629 00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:53,800 It's my last day as a s-single man, you know. 630 00:37:53,840 --> 00:37:56,240 Yeah, well, 631 00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:58,840 it's not all it's cracked up to be, you know. 632 00:37:58,880 --> 00:38:01,680 I'm fucking miserable. (BOTH LAUGH) 633 00:38:03,360 --> 00:38:06,760 You love her man and she loves you. 634 00:38:08,640 --> 00:38:10,840 You've got to hang onto that, haven't you? 635 00:38:13,040 --> 00:38:15,040 I'm proud of you, Cardi. 636 00:38:16,720 --> 00:38:18,720 Thanks, mate. Come and give me a love. 637 00:38:23,240 --> 00:38:26,120 You know it won't change owt. I'll still be here. 638 00:38:26,160 --> 00:38:29,680 I'll still be part of everything. I know you will.Yeah.I know. 639 00:38:29,720 --> 00:38:31,520 It's all right. 640 00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:33,840 Are you gonna come and check your wedding out? 641 00:38:34,880 --> 00:38:36,520 Mm? 642 00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:38,320 Yeah. Come on. 643 00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:40,160 Bejewelled, eh? 644 00:38:40,200 --> 00:38:42,200 Yeah, fucking Carol made it. 645 00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:57,560 Ready? 646 00:38:58,040 --> 00:39:01,440 One. Two. Three. 647 00:39:01,480 --> 00:39:03,480 (CHEERING) 648 00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:08,440 Oh, my... 649 00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:14,680 (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 650 00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:25,640 Are you all right? How are you? 651 00:39:30,240 --> 00:39:33,320 Bloody hell. Who's done that to Nigel? He looks fucking ace! 652 00:39:33,360 --> 00:39:35,120 So... 653 00:39:35,160 --> 00:39:36,760 Yeah? 654 00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:39,320 Are you gonna tell me what really happened last night? 655 00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:40,960 Oh, nothing. 656 00:39:42,120 --> 00:39:43,920 Why don't I believe you? 657 00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:47,160 Look, Erin, honestly, it was nothing. 658 00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:49,200 Right? I promise. 659 00:39:49,240 --> 00:39:51,040 OK. 660 00:39:51,080 --> 00:39:52,720 Dearly beloved. 661 00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:56,160 We are gathered here today to witness the union of 662 00:39:56,200 --> 00:39:58,600 Carol Dennings and Cardi. 663 00:39:58,640 --> 00:40:00,280 (CHEERING) 664 00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:03,720 Or, if we're to use him his birth name, it's actually Leslie Titt. 665 00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:05,400 (LAUGHTER) 666 00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:07,720 The joining together of two people 667 00:40:07,760 --> 00:40:11,160 spending the rest of their lives together is to be respected. 668 00:40:11,200 --> 00:40:14,040 Trust me, as an undertaker, 669 00:40:14,080 --> 00:40:20,080 I've seen many marriages end in violence, misery and murder... 670 00:40:20,120 --> 00:40:23,920 So if any persons here present know of any reason 671 00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:27,320 why these two people should not be joined together in holy wedlock, 672 00:40:27,360 --> 00:40:31,720 can you please speak now or forever hold your peace. 673 00:40:31,760 --> 00:40:33,560 Yeah, me!(GROANING) 674 00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:35,600 Nah, I'm only kidding. Carry on. 675 00:40:35,640 --> 00:40:39,720 Mind you, fifty percent do end in divorce so you're probably... 676 00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:43,760 You're making a good point, but let's continue on, right so... 677 00:40:43,800 --> 00:40:46,800 May we have the bridesmaid and the best man, 678 00:40:46,840 --> 00:40:49,840 come forth and provide the rings? Thank you. 679 00:40:53,560 --> 00:40:55,280 Just answer as I ask, OK.Yes. 680 00:40:55,320 --> 00:41:01,000 Do you, Carol Cassandra Denning, take this man Leslie Arthur Titt? 681 00:41:01,040 --> 00:41:04,560 ♪ MARTY O'REILLY ORCHESTRA: Cold Canary Gaslight 682 00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:06,600 (CHATTER CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY) 683 00:41:07,880 --> 00:41:09,520 ..sickness and in health? 684 00:41:09,560 --> 00:41:11,200 Police! 685 00:41:11,240 --> 00:41:13,040 Armed police! Nobody move! 686 00:41:13,080 --> 00:41:14,880 (INDISTINCT SHOUTING) 687 00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:16,520 Vincent O'Neill. 688 00:41:16,560 --> 00:41:18,160 Nobody move! 689 00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:22,040 Vincent O' Neill, we are arresting you on conspiracy to murder. 690 00:41:22,080 --> 00:41:25,160 You do not have to say anything but it may harm your defence 691 00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:27,280 if you fail to mention when questioned 692 00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:29,640 something which you later rely on in court. 693 00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:32,880 No, you don't understand. He's my best friend. It's my-my wedding. 694 00:41:32,920 --> 00:41:34,720 Cardi... Cardi, love... 695 00:41:47,240 --> 00:41:50,240 Vinnie, no. Just go back inside. You're making a mistake! 696 00:41:50,280 --> 00:41:53,280 Just-Just give me... Just give me 30 seconds. 697 00:41:53,320 --> 00:41:55,040 You've got me now. 698 00:41:55,080 --> 00:41:56,720 Just 30 seconds. 699 00:41:58,760 --> 00:42:00,760 Erin, I know you don't... 700 00:42:02,760 --> 00:42:04,480 ..but I do. 701 00:42:04,520 --> 00:42:06,920 And-And if there was a button, I'd press it. 702 00:42:08,640 --> 00:42:13,280 I know it's wrong, but you're the first thing in the morning... 703 00:42:15,280 --> 00:42:17,280 ..and you're the last thing at night. 704 00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:23,520 I just... I don't know how to tell you how much you mean to me. 705 00:42:26,440 --> 00:42:28,480 Tell Tyler I love him. 706 00:42:29,600 --> 00:42:31,200 Vinnie. 707 00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:36,520 (WHISPERS) 708 00:42:45,960 --> 00:42:47,960 ♪ LARKS: I Want Her To Love Me