1 00:00:09,083 --> 00:00:10,883 Don't breathe in so much- 2 00:00:10,923 --> 00:00:13,123 Don't fucking breath on you. Why? 3 00:00:13,163 --> 00:00:14,043 Just onions innit, and egg. Yeah. 4 00:00:14,043 --> 00:00:16,003 Just onions innit, and egg. Yeah. 5 00:00:16,043 --> 00:00:18,363 I had onion and egg for breakfast with a bit of tomatoes. 6 00:00:18,403 --> 00:00:19,803 It's Mediterranean. 7 00:00:19,843 --> 00:00:22,043 Hush up. Listen. Your breath is terrible now. 8 00:00:22,043 --> 00:00:22,883 Hush up. Listen. Your breath is terrible now. 9 00:00:22,923 --> 00:00:24,763 And look where we are. 10 00:00:24,803 --> 00:00:28,163 You're such a breathy talker. You fucking 11 00:00:28,203 --> 00:00:30,043 Hi everyone, I am Ashely. 12 00:00:30,043 --> 00:00:30,443 Hi everyone, I am Ashely. 13 00:00:30,483 --> 00:00:33,003 I have had Mediterranean for breakfast. 14 00:00:33,043 --> 00:00:34,803 What am I supposed to have for breakfast? 15 00:00:40,563 --> 00:00:42,003 Fuck off man. 16 00:00:44,803 --> 00:00:46,043 Your man said this was a stupid idea. 17 00:00:46,043 --> 00:00:46,803 Your man said this was a stupid idea. 18 00:00:48,763 --> 00:00:51,403 One of Tommo's shag wagon... Fuck truck. Erotic parlour. 19 00:00:51,443 --> 00:00:54,043 One of his clients is a very rich Swedish businessman. Right. 20 00:00:54,043 --> 00:00:55,723 One of his clients is a very rich Swedish businessman. Right. 21 00:00:55,763 --> 00:00:58,523 And he carries a bag full of cash wi' him, everywhere he goes. 22 00:00:58,563 --> 00:01:01,363 - Including into our sessions. - Ow! I'm sorry mother. 23 00:01:01,403 --> 00:01:02,043 So what you want us to fucking swipe it mid spank? 24 00:01:02,043 --> 00:01:03,723 So what you want us to fucking swipe it mid spank? 25 00:01:03,763 --> 00:01:05,043 Ow, yes! Yes. 26 00:01:05,083 --> 00:01:07,003 It's a bit more complicated than that, you see. 27 00:01:07,043 --> 00:01:10,043 The cash is very closely integrated into the roll play itself. 28 00:01:10,043 --> 00:01:10,643 The cash is very closely integrated into the roll play itself. 29 00:01:10,683 --> 00:01:13,443 It's er sort of er, Freudian, y'know. 30 00:01:13,483 --> 00:01:14,923 However, tomorrow morning 31 00:01:14,963 --> 00:01:17,403 he's asked for my services in a hotel room, right? 32 00:01:17,443 --> 00:01:18,043 So what I'm thinking is, you lot distract his bodyguard. 33 00:01:18,043 --> 00:01:20,083 So what I'm thinking is, you lot distract his bodyguard. 34 00:01:21,643 --> 00:01:24,283 Pencil Full Of Lead # 35 00:01:24,323 --> 00:01:25,723 You alright? 36 00:01:25,763 --> 00:01:26,043 I think I'm having a heart attack. 37 00:01:26,043 --> 00:01:27,443 I think I'm having a heart attack. 38 00:01:30,523 --> 00:01:33,923 One of you swoops in and nicks the bag as fast as... 39 00:01:35,163 --> 00:01:37,643 ..sabre skin. Niche reference. Course. 40 00:01:37,683 --> 00:01:41,123 Where will you be waiting until the Bodyguard gets out of the way? 41 00:01:41,163 --> 00:01:42,043 Broom cupboard. Do you know what I mean? 42 00:01:42,043 --> 00:01:43,083 Broom cupboard. Do you know what I mean? 43 00:01:43,123 --> 00:01:44,803 Ash. Fantastic. 44 00:01:44,843 --> 00:01:46,683 I mean that's a stupid idea. 45 00:01:46,723 --> 00:01:49,003 It's actually a brilliant idea. Right? 46 00:01:49,043 --> 00:01:50,043 Yeah. 47 00:01:50,043 --> 00:01:50,403 Yeah. 48 00:01:50,443 --> 00:01:52,003 Oh shit. Let's do this. 49 00:01:53,243 --> 00:01:56,563 Hang on dude. Stop! It's only 1-2 fucking 6. 50 00:01:56,603 --> 00:01:58,043 It's 126, I'm telling ya. Go on. 51 00:01:58,043 --> 00:01:58,163 It's 126, I'm telling ya. Go on. 52 00:02:00,203 --> 00:02:03,043 Oh. No! Masked invaders. Tommo what you wearing that for 53 00:02:03,083 --> 00:02:04,483 Fuck! 54 00:02:04,523 --> 00:02:06,043 Oh, he's fucking massive! 55 00:02:08,363 --> 00:02:10,123 No. No. No! 56 00:02:10,163 --> 00:02:12,883 There's fucking scented oils, Thomas. 57 00:02:12,923 --> 00:02:14,043 Why is he so slippy. 58 00:02:14,083 --> 00:02:16,243 I've never seen them in my life. 59 00:02:16,283 --> 00:02:17,963 I have never seen them before in my life. 60 00:02:19,043 --> 00:02:21,603 What do you think? I can't offer up a dry massage, can I Vin? 61 00:02:26,043 --> 00:02:27,563 Oh, sorry, Boss. 62 00:02:27,603 --> 00:02:29,403 Gentlemen, uh, carry on. 63 00:02:29,443 --> 00:02:30,043 Thank you! 64 00:02:30,043 --> 00:02:31,763 Thank you! 65 00:02:35,763 --> 00:02:37,643 The gun! 66 00:02:42,523 --> 00:02:45,163 Big gun. Bang bang. 67 00:02:46,563 --> 00:02:48,563 Big gun. Bang bang. 68 00:02:48,603 --> 00:02:50,563 It stinks of lavender man. 69 00:02:54,523 --> 00:02:56,483 You get it? 70 00:02:56,523 --> 00:02:57,963 Hold on. Hold on. I drop a bag. 71 00:02:59,323 --> 00:03:01,163 Let's go. 72 00:03:01,203 --> 00:03:02,043 About fucking time. 73 00:03:02,043 --> 00:03:03,403 About fucking time. 74 00:03:03,443 --> 00:03:05,283 Fucking professional thieves. 75 00:03:08,963 --> 00:03:10,043 Well you've joined us at the right time, pet. 76 00:03:10,043 --> 00:03:11,083 Well you've joined us at the right time, pet. 77 00:03:12,723 --> 00:03:15,043 I've been managing this centre for twenty years 78 00:03:15,083 --> 00:03:17,123 and we've never had to cut our cloth so tight. 79 00:03:18,363 --> 00:03:20,843 Me and our Ronnie used to come here when we were little. 80 00:03:21,843 --> 00:03:25,603 And there was always some er, hot chocolate and biscuits. 81 00:03:27,643 --> 00:03:29,163 It meant a lot to us. 82 00:03:30,163 --> 00:03:32,603 That's why, I thought it's good to do the fundraiser you know, 83 00:03:32,643 --> 00:03:34,043 to give something back? Oh yeah. 84 00:03:34,043 --> 00:03:34,403 to give something back? Oh yeah. 85 00:03:34,443 --> 00:03:36,603 Hiyah. Hiyah. 86 00:03:36,643 --> 00:03:37,843 Hiyah. 87 00:03:38,803 --> 00:03:41,083 Between you and me, Erin, love, 88 00:03:41,123 --> 00:03:42,043 we're gonna need more than a jumble sale. 89 00:03:42,043 --> 00:03:43,723 we're gonna need more than a jumble sale. 90 00:03:43,763 --> 00:03:46,203 I mean we've barely got enough money to keep this place going. 91 00:03:46,243 --> 00:03:48,003 Let alone do it up. 92 00:03:50,323 --> 00:03:52,163 Erin and Ronnie? 93 00:03:52,203 --> 00:03:55,323 Yeah. Is Ronnie Croft your brother? 94 00:03:55,363 --> 00:03:57,283 Oh God. Yeah. 95 00:03:57,323 --> 00:03:58,043 Why what did he nick? 96 00:03:58,043 --> 00:03:59,043 Why what did he nick? 97 00:04:00,243 --> 00:04:04,403 My Ted found him making off with all the toilet rolls a few years back. 98 00:04:05,643 --> 00:04:06,043 Well, he tried. 99 00:04:06,043 --> 00:04:06,923 Well, he tried. 100 00:04:07,963 --> 00:04:11,123 He got locked in over bank holiday weekend, poor love. 101 00:04:11,163 --> 00:04:13,123 Yeah, that sounds like our Ronnie. 102 00:04:14,763 --> 00:04:16,643 You can't choose your family. 103 00:04:16,683 --> 00:04:17,883 No you can't! 104 00:04:21,043 --> 00:04:22,043 Do you mean it's where they k-k-keep trees and that? 105 00:04:22,043 --> 00:04:24,203 Do you mean it's where they k-k-keep trees and that? 106 00:04:24,243 --> 00:04:26,003 It says Marsh fucking Gardens? 107 00:04:26,043 --> 00:04:28,283 Marsh Gardens is a fucking shithole. 108 00:04:28,323 --> 00:04:30,043 It is a shithole. And it's also dangerous. 109 00:04:30,043 --> 00:04:30,483 It is a shithole. And it's also dangerous. 110 00:04:30,523 --> 00:04:33,243 Boiled Ham Sam got nailed to a bench there last Christmas. 111 00:04:33,283 --> 00:04:36,083 Boiled Ham Sam nailed himself to the fucking bench 112 00:04:36,123 --> 00:04:37,963 because he's a complete moron. 113 00:04:38,003 --> 00:04:38,043 Do you know how it happened? 114 00:04:38,043 --> 00:04:39,483 Do you know how it happened? 115 00:04:41,923 --> 00:04:44,723 JJ, do you happen to have a garage cat? 116 00:04:44,763 --> 00:04:46,043 No. What's a garage cat? 117 00:04:46,043 --> 00:04:46,723 No. What's a garage cat? 118 00:04:46,763 --> 00:04:48,843 Well it's a cat that lives in a fucking garage int it. 119 00:04:48,883 --> 00:04:50,523 Well that's just a cat surely? 120 00:04:55,923 --> 00:04:56,963 Mearow. 121 00:04:58,363 --> 00:04:59,723 No. 122 00:04:59,763 --> 00:05:02,043 Get a fucking weapon you bellend. 123 00:05:07,563 --> 00:05:09,203 Shh! 124 00:05:09,243 --> 00:05:10,043 No. They fucking know we're here. 125 00:05:10,043 --> 00:05:11,483 No. They fucking know we're here. 126 00:05:11,523 --> 00:05:12,763 Right, now, listen. 127 00:05:14,483 --> 00:05:17,723 If you are a garage cat, you better say somert right now. 128 00:05:21,003 --> 00:05:22,883 Look no-ones gonna hurt you. Just put 'em down. 129 00:05:22,923 --> 00:05:24,963 Put 'em down a little bit. No one gonna hurt ya. 130 00:05:25,003 --> 00:05:26,043 Just, come on out. 131 00:05:26,043 --> 00:05:26,523 Just, come on out. 132 00:05:27,683 --> 00:05:28,843 Come on. 133 00:05:38,403 --> 00:05:41,523 Sorry the, the door was open and it's raining. So... 134 00:05:43,843 --> 00:05:44,883 Are you alright? 135 00:05:46,883 --> 00:05:48,723 You lot know Erin Croft, right? 136 00:05:51,123 --> 00:05:52,603 Who's asking? 137 00:05:55,123 --> 00:05:57,043 I'm Amy Croft. 138 00:05:58,563 --> 00:06:00,363 I think she's my sister. 139 00:06:04,843 --> 00:06:06,043 I've got a sister? 140 00:06:06,043 --> 00:06:06,203 I've got a sister? 141 00:06:07,723 --> 00:06:10,443 I know. I had no idea either. 142 00:06:10,483 --> 00:06:11,763 When did you find out? 143 00:06:11,803 --> 00:06:13,763 Two weeks ago. 144 00:06:13,803 --> 00:06:14,043 When my nan died. Of cancer. 145 00:06:14,043 --> 00:06:15,363 When my nan died. Of cancer. 146 00:06:15,403 --> 00:06:17,363 Well she had cancer, but then it cleared up, 147 00:06:17,403 --> 00:06:20,563 then she felt really poorly so they booked in another scan but she never made it. 148 00:06:20,603 --> 00:06:22,043 Postman just spotted her through the curtains, lying there. 149 00:06:22,043 --> 00:06:23,003 Postman just spotted her through the curtains, lying there. 150 00:06:23,043 --> 00:06:25,883 I cleared out her bungalow for the council because she was a real hoarder 151 00:06:25,923 --> 00:06:27,963 and I found these letters from my dad to my mum saying 152 00:06:28,003 --> 00:06:30,043 how much he missed his little girl Erin and... 153 00:06:30,043 --> 00:06:30,163 how much he missed his little girl Erin and... 154 00:06:31,923 --> 00:06:34,283 I'm babbling aren't I, yeah? 155 00:06:34,323 --> 00:06:36,803 I babble when I'm nervous. Do you babble? 156 00:06:36,843 --> 00:06:38,043 Yeah. 157 00:06:38,043 --> 00:06:38,603 Yeah. 158 00:06:38,643 --> 00:06:40,763 It's just a bit of a surprise to be here. 159 00:06:40,803 --> 00:06:42,843 I can't believe she's got a half sister. 160 00:06:42,883 --> 00:06:46,043 Oh come off it, Neil Croft was a prolific vag hand. 161 00:06:46,043 --> 00:06:46,243 Oh come off it, Neil Croft was a prolific vag hand. 162 00:06:46,283 --> 00:06:48,843 Surprised more of his fucking progeny haven't crawled out 163 00:06:48,883 --> 00:06:50,443 the woodwork sooner. 164 00:06:51,363 --> 00:06:53,883 I hope you don't think I'm a stalker or anything. 165 00:06:53,923 --> 00:06:54,043 I just... I found you online. 166 00:06:54,043 --> 00:06:56,163 I just... I found you online. 167 00:06:56,203 --> 00:06:58,683 And saw you outside the garage and 168 00:06:58,723 --> 00:07:00,723 just headed there and then when the boys got there, 169 00:07:00,763 --> 00:07:02,043 I just completely fucking shat my knickers, I didn't know what to say. 170 00:07:02,043 --> 00:07:03,563 I just completely fucking shat my knickers, I didn't know what to say. 171 00:07:10,123 --> 00:07:11,763 You do remind me of him, actually. 172 00:07:13,083 --> 00:07:15,123 What do you think they're talking about now? 173 00:07:15,163 --> 00:07:17,963 I don't know. Well it'll dad stuff won't it. A bit of common ground. 174 00:07:19,363 --> 00:07:21,283 They've got the same dad? 175 00:07:23,363 --> 00:07:26,043 Yes. I mean fuck me, why do you think she's here, you dick head. 176 00:07:26,043 --> 00:07:26,083 Yes. I mean fuck me, why do you think she's here, you dick head. 177 00:07:26,123 --> 00:07:27,443 That's... I know that, sorry. 178 00:07:27,483 --> 00:07:29,803 I, wrong... They've got the same dad, as in, 179 00:07:29,843 --> 00:07:31,643 'oh my god they've got the same dad'. 180 00:07:31,683 --> 00:07:34,043 Can you believe. Can you believe they've got the same dad. 181 00:07:34,083 --> 00:07:36,203 It's like my intonation. Shut up! 182 00:07:36,243 --> 00:07:39,683 She always wanted a sister, you know, when she was younger. 183 00:07:39,723 --> 00:07:41,963 They seem nice, your mates. 184 00:07:42,003 --> 00:07:42,043 Yeah. They're great. 185 00:07:42,043 --> 00:07:43,563 Yeah. They're great. 186 00:07:44,603 --> 00:07:46,003 Fuck off. 187 00:07:50,003 --> 00:07:50,043 So I take it from the accent that you're not from round here? 188 00:07:50,043 --> 00:07:52,443 So I take it from the accent that you're not from round here? 189 00:07:52,483 --> 00:07:54,963 No. Er Liverpool. 190 00:07:55,003 --> 00:07:57,963 Erm, I'm staying in a hostel in town, though, the- 191 00:07:58,003 --> 00:07:58,043 The Hawley Backpackers? 192 00:07:58,043 --> 00:07:59,483 The Hawley Backpackers? 193 00:07:59,523 --> 00:08:01,803 Oh Jesus. That's a shithole. 194 00:08:02,723 --> 00:08:04,363 That's where I were conceived, you know. 195 00:08:05,323 --> 00:08:06,043 You can take Sugar's old room, OK? 196 00:08:06,043 --> 00:08:07,923 You can take Sugar's old room, OK? 197 00:08:07,963 --> 00:08:10,763 She's still got some stuff in there, that she needs to take to JJ's, 198 00:08:10,803 --> 00:08:12,843 so if it gets in your way, just shove it in a corner. 199 00:08:12,883 --> 00:08:14,043 Thanks. This is so nice of you. 200 00:08:14,043 --> 00:08:14,883 Thanks. This is so nice of you. 201 00:08:15,683 --> 00:08:18,203 Well I can't have you telling your mates that you met your sister 202 00:08:18,243 --> 00:08:19,963 and she let you catch skin mites. 203 00:08:20,003 --> 00:08:22,043 Plus you don't seem like a raving lunatic. 204 00:08:22,043 --> 00:08:22,683 Plus you don't seem like a raving lunatic. 205 00:08:22,723 --> 00:08:24,963 Yeah well that's what you think. 206 00:08:25,003 --> 00:08:27,523 This bag's full of hammers. Oh good. 207 00:08:27,563 --> 00:08:29,923 You can hang some pictures up for me, then can't ya. 208 00:08:29,963 --> 00:08:30,043 Er, Tyler? 209 00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:32,403 Er, Tyler? 210 00:08:32,443 --> 00:08:35,363 Plus, being a lunatic runs in the family. So you're alright. 211 00:08:35,403 --> 00:08:37,843 Right, OK, so this is Amy. Hiyah. 212 00:08:37,883 --> 00:08:38,043 She's a friend. And she's gonna be staying with us for a few days. 213 00:08:38,043 --> 00:08:40,683 She's a friend. And she's gonna be staying with us for a few days. 214 00:08:40,723 --> 00:08:42,883 Yeah? Hi. 215 00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:44,443 Oh. 216 00:08:46,323 --> 00:08:47,763 That's kids for you in it. 217 00:08:47,803 --> 00:08:49,603 Sorry, why Marsh Gardens? 218 00:08:49,643 --> 00:08:51,883 Because they've had this massive fucking upgrade, 219 00:08:51,923 --> 00:08:53,643 and there's all these rare, exotic plants. 220 00:08:53,683 --> 00:08:54,043 And this year's new centre piece, yeah. 221 00:08:54,043 --> 00:08:57,283 And this year's new centre piece, yeah. 222 00:08:57,323 --> 00:09:01,763 Is a Shakespeare's Sister rose bush. 223 00:09:01,803 --> 00:09:02,043 That flower is the most expensive flower in the world. 224 00:09:02,043 --> 00:09:06,523 That flower is the most expensive flower in the world. 225 00:09:06,563 --> 00:09:09,203 Yeah. It's all well and good stealing it, but let's be honest, 226 00:09:09,243 --> 00:09:10,043 it's not worth anything unless we can shift it. 227 00:09:10,043 --> 00:09:11,123 it's not worth anything unless we can shift it. 228 00:09:11,163 --> 00:09:14,043 Already sorted. You remember my cousin's wedding? 229 00:09:14,083 --> 00:09:16,483 Well, that was pretty small fish for us frying, boys, yeah. 230 00:09:16,523 --> 00:09:18,043 I know plenty of Bridezillas who'd kill for those roses. 231 00:09:18,043 --> 00:09:19,443 I know plenty of Bridezillas who'd kill for those roses. 232 00:09:19,483 --> 00:09:22,523 For real. JJ, the golden child. 233 00:09:22,563 --> 00:09:23,963 Yeah. The Goodless squire. 234 00:09:24,003 --> 00:09:26,043 The Goodless Squires a good one. 235 00:09:26,043 --> 00:09:26,483 The Goodless Squires a good one. 236 00:09:26,523 --> 00:09:29,083 Anyway. Shut up. Ash, give over. 237 00:09:29,123 --> 00:09:32,043 He's found a buyer alright. She's a blushing bride. 238 00:09:32,083 --> 00:09:34,043 She's willing to pay up to five grand 239 00:09:34,043 --> 00:09:35,043 She's willing to pay up to five grand 240 00:09:35,083 --> 00:09:36,283 for three fucking stems. 241 00:09:36,323 --> 00:09:39,003 Jesus sake she must be off her rocker this bird. 242 00:09:39,043 --> 00:09:40,083 Five grand? Yeah. 243 00:09:40,123 --> 00:09:41,723 Do you know what, she actually isn't. 244 00:09:41,763 --> 00:09:42,043 And I'm a bit scared of her. 245 00:09:42,043 --> 00:09:43,163 And I'm a bit scared of her. 246 00:09:43,203 --> 00:09:45,883 This is the biggest day of my life 247 00:09:45,923 --> 00:09:49,123 and you want me walking down the aisle with flowers that look like 248 00:09:49,163 --> 00:09:50,043 they were nicked from a fucking lamp post after a car accident? 249 00:09:50,043 --> 00:09:53,523 they were nicked from a fucking lamp post after a car accident? 250 00:10:03,083 --> 00:10:05,643 Ah. Ah! Ah! 251 00:10:05,683 --> 00:10:06,043 Fuck, quick open the door, let some draft in. 252 00:10:06,043 --> 00:10:09,043 Fuck, quick open the door, let some draft in. 253 00:10:09,083 --> 00:10:10,403 Fucking hell. 254 00:10:11,403 --> 00:10:13,963 Oh well that's not ideal, is it? 255 00:10:14,003 --> 00:10:14,043 Are those the cakes for mine and Albie's stall? 256 00:10:14,043 --> 00:10:15,963 Are those the cakes for mine and Albie's stall? 257 00:10:16,003 --> 00:10:17,563 No. These are practice ones. 258 00:10:17,603 --> 00:10:19,403 You said you'd come and do my reading with me? 259 00:10:19,443 --> 00:10:21,923 Oh baby. I need, I need to clear all this up, 260 00:10:21,963 --> 00:10:22,043 and I've got paperwork to do for the centre before your dad gets here. 261 00:10:22,043 --> 00:10:24,643 and I've got paperwork to do for the centre before your dad gets here. 262 00:10:24,683 --> 00:10:27,163 Can we do it later? Yeah? 263 00:10:27,203 --> 00:10:29,643 Oh well I can go and read with him for a bit if you want? 264 00:10:30,763 --> 00:10:32,163 Yeh? 265 00:10:34,403 --> 00:10:36,963 It's really boring. School gave it me. 266 00:10:38,523 --> 00:10:39,883 Do you like school? 267 00:10:39,923 --> 00:10:41,843 No. 268 00:10:41,883 --> 00:10:43,403 Me neither. 269 00:10:43,443 --> 00:10:45,083 Have you read this? 270 00:10:45,963 --> 00:10:46,043 Charlotte's web. 271 00:10:46,043 --> 00:10:47,243 Charlotte's web. 272 00:10:47,283 --> 00:10:49,283 Picked it up at a charity shop. 273 00:10:49,323 --> 00:10:50,883 My mum used to read it to me as a kid. 274 00:10:51,763 --> 00:10:53,483 What's it about? 275 00:10:53,523 --> 00:10:54,043 A spider. 276 00:10:54,043 --> 00:10:55,003 A spider. 277 00:10:55,043 --> 00:10:56,843 I bet you're scared of spiders. 278 00:10:56,883 --> 00:10:58,003 No I'm not. 279 00:10:58,043 --> 00:10:59,563 Hmm, OK. 280 00:10:59,603 --> 00:11:01,683 But are you scared of pigs? 281 00:11:03,083 --> 00:11:05,123 "Charlotte stopped. 282 00:11:05,163 --> 00:11:08,723 "A moment later a tear came to Wilbur's eye. 283 00:11:08,763 --> 00:11:10,043 "'Oh Charlotte,' he said, 284 00:11:10,043 --> 00:11:11,363 "'Oh Charlotte,' he said, 285 00:11:11,403 --> 00:11:13,723 "'to think that when I first met you...'" 286 00:11:18,083 --> 00:11:19,803 I can't believe how good he is. 287 00:11:19,843 --> 00:11:21,483 I know. He's so good. 288 00:11:25,963 --> 00:11:26,043 I always worried. 289 00:11:26,043 --> 00:11:27,483 I always worried. 290 00:11:27,523 --> 00:11:29,443 Hmm. 291 00:11:29,483 --> 00:11:31,523 That he'd end up like me. 292 00:11:31,563 --> 00:11:32,963 How do you mean? 293 00:11:34,963 --> 00:11:37,403 Not very academic, you know. 294 00:11:37,443 --> 00:11:39,523 Vin, 295 00:11:39,563 --> 00:11:41,003 he is like you. 296 00:11:42,123 --> 00:11:43,723 But all the best ways. 297 00:11:43,763 --> 00:11:45,363 Hmm. 298 00:11:45,403 --> 00:11:47,683 Tell me some of the best ways. 299 00:11:47,723 --> 00:11:50,003 What now? Right now. 300 00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:51,483 It's very important. 301 00:11:51,523 --> 00:11:53,163 Oh to think. Er... 302 00:11:53,203 --> 00:11:55,723 Can't think of one can you? Oh, I just need more time. 303 00:11:55,763 --> 00:11:56,963 Alright, handsome? 304 00:11:57,003 --> 00:11:58,043 Alright, I'll give you that one. 305 00:11:58,043 --> 00:11:58,283 Alright, I'll give you that one. 306 00:11:58,323 --> 00:12:00,763 Brilliant hairline. 307 00:12:03,363 --> 00:12:04,603 This can't be right? 308 00:12:04,643 --> 00:12:06,043 No, well, JJ's been and checked it. 309 00:12:06,043 --> 00:12:06,723 No, well, JJ's been and checked it. 310 00:12:06,763 --> 00:12:09,923 He said it needs rewiring, the whole thing needs rewiring, 311 00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:12,363 before it gets a fucking refit, you know. 312 00:12:12,403 --> 00:12:14,043 Right well. There's no way the fundraisers gonna raise that sort of money is it? 313 00:12:14,043 --> 00:12:15,523 Right well. There's no way the fundraisers gonna raise that sort of money is it? 314 00:12:15,563 --> 00:12:17,243 No. 315 00:12:17,283 --> 00:12:19,203 I mean, we'll help. 316 00:12:19,243 --> 00:12:21,043 But fucking hell. Hm. 317 00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:24,763 How's Amy? 318 00:12:24,803 --> 00:12:26,403 Yeah, she really sweet. 319 00:12:28,483 --> 00:12:30,043 Does she have a Mum? 320 00:12:30,043 --> 00:12:30,603 Does she have a Mum? 321 00:12:30,643 --> 00:12:33,563 Er no. No, she died about eight years ago, bless her. 322 00:12:36,363 --> 00:12:38,043 How are you feeling about it? 323 00:12:38,043 --> 00:12:38,403 How are you feeling about it? 324 00:12:38,443 --> 00:12:39,963 Well, 325 00:12:40,003 --> 00:12:42,083 it is a bit of a head fuck, I'm not gonna lie. 326 00:12:43,123 --> 00:12:44,643 But she's not Ronnie. 327 00:12:44,683 --> 00:12:46,043 Thank fuck. So. 328 00:12:46,043 --> 00:12:47,243 Thank fuck. So. 329 00:12:47,283 --> 00:12:50,723 Pyramid Song # 330 00:13:01,123 --> 00:13:02,043 Oh, hey. 331 00:13:02,043 --> 00:13:02,403 Oh, hey. 332 00:13:03,443 --> 00:13:05,043 Hello. 333 00:13:05,083 --> 00:13:06,443 Hi. 334 00:13:10,643 --> 00:13:12,523 Oh, err. Just erm... 335 00:13:16,963 --> 00:13:18,043 Coming along nicely. 336 00:13:18,043 --> 00:13:18,443 Coming along nicely. 337 00:13:20,963 --> 00:13:22,363 Er, do you want something? 338 00:13:23,603 --> 00:13:25,163 I was hoping to talk to Vincent. 339 00:13:25,203 --> 00:13:26,043 Yeah erm... He's, he's, he's busy. 340 00:13:26,043 --> 00:13:27,123 Yeah erm... He's, he's, he's busy. 341 00:13:29,083 --> 00:13:30,403 I'll wait. 342 00:13:35,163 --> 00:13:37,283 You can tell me. I'll, I'll pass it on. 343 00:13:39,923 --> 00:13:41,483 Dylan. Yeah. 344 00:13:41,523 --> 00:13:42,043 Such a lovely name. 345 00:13:42,043 --> 00:13:43,363 Such a lovely name. 346 00:13:43,403 --> 00:13:46,043 Lyrical. Yeah. 347 00:13:46,923 --> 00:13:48,803 Means 'Son of the Ocean'. 348 00:13:48,843 --> 00:13:50,043 Do you like the ocean? 349 00:13:50,043 --> 00:13:50,723 Do you like the ocean? 350 00:13:52,643 --> 00:13:55,603 I- I don't really have a strong opinion. 351 00:13:57,043 --> 00:13:58,043 I'm a big fan. 352 00:13:58,043 --> 00:13:59,003 I'm a big fan. 353 00:13:59,043 --> 00:14:00,683 Coral. 354 00:14:00,723 --> 00:14:02,923 Squid. 355 00:14:02,963 --> 00:14:04,203 Eels. 356 00:14:05,363 --> 00:14:06,043 I love it all. 357 00:14:06,043 --> 00:14:06,563 I love it all. 358 00:14:09,323 --> 00:14:11,443 Great. Do you want a bottle of pop? 359 00:14:17,443 --> 00:14:18,923 No. 360 00:14:18,963 --> 00:14:20,723 Thank you. 361 00:14:20,763 --> 00:14:22,043 Can't tempt you? 362 00:14:22,043 --> 00:14:22,083 Can't tempt you? 363 00:14:23,763 --> 00:14:24,963 No. 364 00:14:32,883 --> 00:14:34,123 Yeah go on. 365 00:14:47,123 --> 00:14:48,523 Thank you. 366 00:14:52,123 --> 00:14:54,043 My mum used to make them and sell them at the market. 367 00:14:54,043 --> 00:14:54,683 My mum used to make them and sell them at the market. 368 00:14:54,723 --> 00:14:58,643 But by the time she was retired, she had bloody witchy claw fingers. 369 00:14:58,683 --> 00:15:00,323 Oh erm, 370 00:15:00,363 --> 00:15:02,043 I forgot to tell you, we're taking you out tonight. 371 00:15:02,043 --> 00:15:02,363 I forgot to tell you, we're taking you out tonight. 372 00:15:02,403 --> 00:15:03,883 Where we going? 373 00:15:03,923 --> 00:15:05,923 Um, the Vortex Lounge? 374 00:15:05,963 --> 00:15:08,003 I mean it is pretty disgusting 375 00:15:08,043 --> 00:15:10,043 but the drinks are cheap and the music's really good, so... 376 00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:11,003 but the drinks are cheap and the music's really good, so... 377 00:15:11,043 --> 00:15:12,563 It's erm, 378 00:15:12,603 --> 00:15:14,723 it's not dressy is it? 379 00:15:14,763 --> 00:15:16,603 Don't worry. I have a plan. 380 00:15:18,123 --> 00:15:19,283 No. 381 00:15:21,123 --> 00:15:23,043 Hm? Too see-though. 382 00:15:25,523 --> 00:15:26,043 This can't be yours? 383 00:15:26,043 --> 00:15:28,283 This can't be yours? 384 00:15:28,323 --> 00:15:30,763 It's my maternity dress. 385 00:15:32,163 --> 00:15:34,043 Ooh! 386 00:15:34,043 --> 00:15:34,163 Ooh! 387 00:15:34,203 --> 00:15:37,883 Ah, OK, yeah. That is my prom dress. 388 00:15:37,923 --> 00:15:40,283 Vinnie nicked it from this snobby shop in town. 389 00:15:40,323 --> 00:15:42,043 The women refused to serve me. Cheeky bitch. 390 00:15:42,043 --> 00:15:42,643 The women refused to serve me. Cheeky bitch. 391 00:15:42,683 --> 00:15:43,883 And I had the money, as well. 392 00:15:43,923 --> 00:15:45,323 So Vinnie is your boyfriend then? 393 00:15:45,363 --> 00:15:47,563 No.... 394 00:15:47,603 --> 00:15:48,923 I like this one? 395 00:15:48,963 --> 00:15:50,043 Yes. I love that one. 396 00:15:50,043 --> 00:15:51,243 Yes. I love that one. 397 00:15:51,283 --> 00:15:52,563 Perfect. 398 00:15:52,603 --> 00:15:55,683 All I'm saying is presumably, by this point, 399 00:15:55,723 --> 00:15:57,723 Tyler can look after himself can he not? 400 00:15:57,763 --> 00:15:58,043 No, he's a bloody child int he. 401 00:15:58,043 --> 00:15:59,483 No, he's a bloody child int he. 402 00:15:59,523 --> 00:16:01,923 Listen, it's an opportunity for Dyl and Tyler 403 00:16:01,963 --> 00:16:03,283 to just chill out together a bit. 404 00:16:03,323 --> 00:16:05,563 They fucking miss each other. You know what I mean. 405 00:16:08,243 --> 00:16:10,003 Fucking JJ. 406 00:16:12,563 --> 00:16:14,043 Do you know what you fat- swear to God. 407 00:16:14,043 --> 00:16:14,803 Do you know what you fat- swear to God. 408 00:16:14,843 --> 00:16:19,723 Do you know your fucking friend was supposed to have unlocked it? 409 00:16:19,763 --> 00:16:21,683 Darren got the fucking date wrong. 410 00:16:21,723 --> 00:16:22,043 He's read it as month first, day second. Like bloody American's. 411 00:16:22,043 --> 00:16:24,443 He's read it as month first, day second. Like bloody American's. 412 00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:26,123 Well is he American then? 413 00:16:26,163 --> 00:16:27,803 Is he fuck. He's from the Forest of Dean. 414 00:16:27,843 --> 00:16:30,043 Forest of Dean. It's a very nice part of the world. 415 00:16:30,043 --> 00:16:30,363 Forest of Dean. It's a very nice part of the world. 416 00:16:30,403 --> 00:16:33,883 Is it? Where is it? Area of outstanding natural beauty. 417 00:16:33,923 --> 00:16:35,203 You shut up you. 418 00:16:35,243 --> 00:16:37,203 Now we're gonna have to find another way in. 419 00:16:37,243 --> 00:16:38,043 Get in the- Get in the fucking van. Just fucking typical. 420 00:16:38,043 --> 00:16:40,083 Get in the- Get in the fucking van. Just fucking typical. 421 00:16:40,123 --> 00:16:42,443 Fucking hell. Fucking Darren. Darren of Dean 422 00:16:53,323 --> 00:16:54,043 All done. Come on. Hey, I'm just saying, right. 423 00:16:54,043 --> 00:16:56,043 All done. Come on. Hey, I'm just saying, right. 424 00:16:56,083 --> 00:16:59,843 If I'm gonna be abseiling in future I'd like to know in advance. 425 00:16:59,883 --> 00:17:01,323 Yeah? 426 00:17:01,363 --> 00:17:02,043 Alright you. Come on. 427 00:17:02,043 --> 00:17:02,763 Alright you. Come on. 428 00:17:05,043 --> 00:17:07,283 Look I-I-I don't want to. 429 00:17:07,323 --> 00:17:09,043 Eh? Cardi, come on man. 430 00:17:09,083 --> 00:17:10,043 You've been in worst scrapes than this, dude. 431 00:17:10,043 --> 00:17:10,963 You've been in worst scrapes than this, dude. 432 00:17:11,003 --> 00:17:14,003 I've got responsibilities now. I've got Carol. 433 00:17:14,043 --> 00:17:17,043 I-I-I promised her I'd protect them. My t-t-testicles. 434 00:17:17,083 --> 00:17:18,043 Mate, I'm asking you to climb down a wall, 435 00:17:18,043 --> 00:17:19,123 Mate, I'm asking you to climb down a wall, 436 00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:20,643 not use your dick as a death slide. 437 00:17:20,683 --> 00:17:22,803 Yeah, but I keep bashing them on things. 438 00:17:22,843 --> 00:17:24,683 I seen the doctor about it. 439 00:17:24,723 --> 00:17:26,003 Well go on then, what did he say? 440 00:17:26,043 --> 00:17:27,963 He said, Cardi stop bashing them on things. 441 00:17:28,003 --> 00:17:29,763 Well he will do, won't he? Yeah. 442 00:17:29,803 --> 00:17:31,883 Listen, just go and wait in the fucking van then. 443 00:17:31,923 --> 00:17:33,563 Go and play snake or somert. 444 00:17:34,563 --> 00:17:35,723 Are you angry with me? 445 00:17:35,763 --> 00:17:38,243 No. Dude I'm just cross. Cos you- 446 00:17:38,283 --> 00:17:39,803 because you're sensitive. 447 00:17:39,843 --> 00:17:41,723 Sometimes you can be hard work, Cardi. Very. 448 00:17:43,203 --> 00:17:44,843 I'm coming down. 449 00:17:44,883 --> 00:17:47,723 Good lad. Now listen before you do just make be sure- 450 00:17:47,763 --> 00:17:49,443 Oh. 451 00:17:49,483 --> 00:17:50,043 Nailed it. Come on. 452 00:17:50,043 --> 00:17:51,603 Nailed it. Come on. 453 00:17:51,643 --> 00:17:52,803 Right. 454 00:17:52,843 --> 00:17:54,363 So, there is a grounds keeper, 455 00:17:54,403 --> 00:17:56,563 but he just sits and watches porn in his cottage. 456 00:17:56,603 --> 00:17:58,003 Right. Living the dream. 457 00:18:00,403 --> 00:18:02,803 Hey, God sake. 458 00:18:02,843 --> 00:18:05,043 Fucking look at his place, man. 459 00:18:05,083 --> 00:18:06,043 Fuck me. This is amazing. 460 00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:06,883 Fuck me. This is amazing. 461 00:18:06,923 --> 00:18:10,083 Right. The trick... 462 00:18:11,203 --> 00:18:13,403 What the hell you doing? What the fuck is wrong with you. 463 00:18:13,443 --> 00:18:14,043 Knobhead. Come 'ed. 464 00:18:14,043 --> 00:18:14,803 Knobhead. Come 'ed. 465 00:18:14,843 --> 00:18:16,723 Right. I'll meet you there? 466 00:18:16,763 --> 00:18:17,883 I've got some business. 467 00:18:17,923 --> 00:18:19,203 What do you mean business? 468 00:18:19,243 --> 00:18:21,763 You haven't got any business in a fucking Victorian green house 469 00:18:21,803 --> 00:18:22,043 for God sake dude. I have got business, mate. 470 00:18:22,043 --> 00:18:23,643 for God sake dude. I have got business, mate. 471 00:18:23,683 --> 00:18:25,923 Why ya... What, is it for the Fuck truck? 472 00:18:25,963 --> 00:18:28,003 No. No. No. No. Nothing mucky. 473 00:18:28,043 --> 00:18:30,043 Nothing mucky, right, I've looked online. 474 00:18:30,043 --> 00:18:30,083 Nothing mucky, right, I've looked online. 475 00:18:30,123 --> 00:18:32,563 They've got peyote. Wolves? 476 00:18:32,603 --> 00:18:34,683 It's a fucking Coyote you dickhead. 477 00:18:34,723 --> 00:18:38,043 It's a cactus with psychoactive compound. Namely, mescaline. 478 00:18:38,043 --> 00:18:39,163 It's a cactus with psychoactive compound. Namely, mescaline. 479 00:18:39,963 --> 00:18:43,363 Actually, could we take fifteen? Cos I'd love to get some cuttings. 480 00:18:43,403 --> 00:18:45,203 - Would ya? - Yeah I need a poo. 481 00:18:45,243 --> 00:18:46,043 And you need a poo. Do you know, alright fair enough. 482 00:18:46,043 --> 00:18:47,283 And you need a poo. Do you know, alright fair enough. 483 00:18:47,323 --> 00:18:49,563 Let's just find the reception first. 484 00:18:49,603 --> 00:18:51,203 Cos they have maps. 485 00:18:51,243 --> 00:18:53,563 Do you know that way we won't get fucking lost in this place. 486 00:18:53,603 --> 00:18:54,043 - They have headphones. - Yeah. 487 00:18:54,043 --> 00:18:55,083 - They have headphones. - Yeah. 488 00:18:55,123 --> 00:18:56,123 Don't they? Yeah. 489 00:18:56,163 --> 00:18:57,803 So we'll know what were looking at. 490 00:18:57,843 --> 00:18:59,363 Be easier to find the rose bush! 491 00:18:59,403 --> 00:19:01,643 You fucking idiots! 492 00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:02,043 No, it's a very, very serious robbery dude. 493 00:19:02,043 --> 00:19:05,563 No, it's a very, very serious robbery dude. 494 00:19:05,603 --> 00:19:07,523 You know there's a lot of prep been put into this. 495 00:19:07,563 --> 00:19:09,963 Fucking get your heads in the game. OK? 496 00:19:10,003 --> 00:19:10,043 Yes? Fair enough. 497 00:19:10,043 --> 00:19:12,683 Yes? Fair enough. 498 00:19:14,123 --> 00:19:15,403 Let's just fuck it off for a bit. 499 00:19:15,443 --> 00:19:17,323 We'll meet in 15 minutes by the rose bush, yeah? 500 00:19:17,363 --> 00:19:18,043 Fifteen. Will you come with me for a poo? 501 00:19:18,043 --> 00:19:18,923 Fifteen. Will you come with me for a poo? 502 00:19:18,963 --> 00:19:20,883 Yeah dude. Why can't you poo at home man? 503 00:19:20,923 --> 00:19:22,843 I poo at home. I poo here. 504 00:19:22,883 --> 00:19:25,603 Liar, Liar # 505 00:19:26,803 --> 00:19:28,803 Do you know what exactly we're after here? 506 00:19:28,843 --> 00:19:31,563 I do yes. We're looking for a type of cactus. 507 00:19:32,483 --> 00:19:34,043 That's not very specific, Tommo? 508 00:19:34,043 --> 00:19:34,323 That's not very specific, Tommo? 509 00:19:34,363 --> 00:19:35,683 Fucking hell. 510 00:19:37,243 --> 00:19:38,883 What? 511 00:19:39,923 --> 00:19:42,043 I thought that was some, someone man just standing there. 512 00:19:42,043 --> 00:19:42,763 I thought that was some, someone man just standing there. 513 00:19:42,803 --> 00:19:44,443 That were a man? Yeah. 514 00:19:44,483 --> 00:19:46,163 A very thin man going like that. 515 00:19:47,083 --> 00:19:49,043 Ahah what are you looking at? 516 00:19:49,083 --> 00:19:50,043 Yeah. What is that French or somert- yeah. 517 00:19:50,043 --> 00:19:51,963 Yeah. What is that French or somert- yeah. 518 00:19:52,003 --> 00:19:53,163 Check this out 519 00:19:53,203 --> 00:19:54,283 Fucking hell. 520 00:19:54,323 --> 00:19:56,843 Shut up you dickhead. 521 00:19:56,883 --> 00:19:58,043 My foots stuck onto it. 522 00:19:58,043 --> 00:19:58,643 My foots stuck onto it. 523 00:19:58,683 --> 00:20:00,763 Fucking hell. Gently! 524 00:20:00,803 --> 00:20:02,403 Fucking Cobra Kai'ing it you knobhead. 525 00:20:04,283 --> 00:20:06,043 Fuck sake. Knobhead. 526 00:20:06,043 --> 00:20:06,483 Fuck sake. Knobhead. 527 00:20:07,443 --> 00:20:09,523 What the fuck did you expect from that, eh? 528 00:20:09,563 --> 00:20:11,203 Round housing it, you mad bastard. 529 00:20:11,243 --> 00:20:13,483 I'm wearing desert boots, I thought they would be grand! 530 00:20:13,523 --> 00:20:14,043 It's gone straight through, han't it? 531 00:20:14,043 --> 00:20:15,083 It's gone straight through, han't it? 532 00:20:15,123 --> 00:20:16,803 You have to piss on it, don't ya? 533 00:20:16,843 --> 00:20:18,603 No that's jelly fish. 534 00:20:20,003 --> 00:20:21,403 Mate, that is jellyfish. 535 00:20:21,443 --> 00:20:22,043 # If you don't wanna see me 536 00:20:22,043 --> 00:20:24,203 # If you don't wanna see me 537 00:20:27,563 --> 00:20:30,043 # Did a full 180 538 00:20:30,043 --> 00:20:30,443 # Did a full 180 539 00:20:30,483 --> 00:20:32,963 # Crazy... # 540 00:20:33,003 --> 00:20:34,523 So let me get this right. 541 00:20:34,563 --> 00:20:36,563 You're married to... Cardi? 542 00:20:36,603 --> 00:20:38,043 That's correct. That prize stallion is off the market. 543 00:20:38,043 --> 00:20:39,963 That's correct. That prize stallion is off the market. 544 00:20:41,803 --> 00:20:44,163 And you, you're going out with JJ? 545 00:20:44,203 --> 00:20:45,563 Yes. Yes. 546 00:20:45,603 --> 00:20:46,043 And that means I never have to pay for my full body M.O.T. 547 00:20:46,043 --> 00:20:49,323 And that means I never have to pay for my full body M.O.T. 548 00:20:49,363 --> 00:20:50,923 if you know what I mean? 549 00:20:50,963 --> 00:20:53,523 Course we knows what you mean, now, sugar, like. 550 00:20:53,563 --> 00:20:54,043 Fucking children on the street know what you mean. 551 00:20:54,043 --> 00:20:55,923 Fucking children on the street know what you mean. 552 00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:58,403 And you used to go out with Dylan, 553 00:20:58,443 --> 00:21:00,003 but Vinnie is Tyler's dad? 554 00:21:00,043 --> 00:21:02,043 But that's not a thing anymore. That's... that's done. 555 00:21:02,043 --> 00:21:02,923 But that's not a thing anymore. That's... that's done. 556 00:21:02,963 --> 00:21:04,963 Right. Then, yeah. 557 00:21:05,003 --> 00:21:07,403 So is there anyone in the group you haven't like... 558 00:21:07,443 --> 00:21:08,883 Tommo. 559 00:21:11,003 --> 00:21:12,643 Get it myself, dickhead. 560 00:21:12,683 --> 00:21:14,283 Christ on a bike. 561 00:21:14,323 --> 00:21:16,003 What have you fucking done to your foot? 562 00:21:16,043 --> 00:21:18,043 He's fine. He's fine. Aren't you? Might just need a tetanus jab. 563 00:21:18,043 --> 00:21:18,843 He's fine. He's fine. Aren't you? Might just need a tetanus jab. 564 00:21:18,883 --> 00:21:20,603 I'm not doing any needles, I don't like 'em. 565 00:21:20,643 --> 00:21:22,283 Your foot looks like a bog brush. 566 00:21:22,323 --> 00:21:23,843 Can we just get on with this? 567 00:21:23,883 --> 00:21:26,043 Hang on no. There's a break glass alarms weeper? 568 00:21:26,043 --> 00:21:27,163 Hang on no. There's a break glass alarms weeper? 569 00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:30,603 A glass break alarm weeper. 570 00:21:30,643 --> 00:21:34,043 I know what it fucking means. We're not gonna break the glass. 571 00:21:34,043 --> 00:21:34,323 I know what it fucking means. We're not gonna break the glass. 572 00:21:36,123 --> 00:21:37,923 Implements. You know what I mean? 573 00:21:40,563 --> 00:21:42,043 He knows his onions doesn't he? 574 00:21:42,043 --> 00:21:42,883 He knows his onions doesn't he? 575 00:21:42,923 --> 00:21:44,763 He does know his onions, this lad. 576 00:21:47,403 --> 00:21:50,043 That, actually quite impressive. Yes. That is impressive. Go on JJ. 577 00:21:50,043 --> 00:21:51,163 That, actually quite impressive. Yes. That is impressive. Go on JJ. 578 00:21:52,523 --> 00:21:54,643 Dude. 579 00:21:54,683 --> 00:21:57,123 Massive in it. Do you know what I mean? 580 00:21:57,163 --> 00:21:58,043 Fucking lads. Do you know what I mean? 581 00:21:58,043 --> 00:21:59,563 Fucking lads. Do you know what I mean? 582 00:21:59,603 --> 00:22:02,523 Unbelievable, I'm just, I'm wondering though. 583 00:22:02,563 --> 00:22:06,003 How we're gonna get that rose 584 00:22:06,043 --> 00:22:08,363 through that fucking hole there. 585 00:22:09,683 --> 00:22:12,123 Shit that's not good. Not good. Fuck. Fuck. No. No. No. 586 00:22:12,163 --> 00:22:13,163 Bad. 587 00:22:14,523 --> 00:22:16,643 No! Shit. 588 00:22:16,683 --> 00:22:18,523 Run away. Run away and leave it. 589 00:22:18,563 --> 00:22:20,323 Someone grab the bush! 590 00:22:20,363 --> 00:22:22,043 Afro-Left # 591 00:22:22,043 --> 00:22:22,723 Afro-Left # 592 00:22:38,803 --> 00:22:41,163 Yeah, see he's asleep now. 593 00:22:41,203 --> 00:22:42,963 Now to relax and enjoy myself. 594 00:22:43,003 --> 00:22:44,243 Yeah. 595 00:22:47,603 --> 00:22:49,763 What was he like? Dad? 596 00:22:52,323 --> 00:22:54,043 Er charming, 597 00:22:54,043 --> 00:22:54,123 Er charming, 598 00:22:55,203 --> 00:22:57,283 funny, very funny. 599 00:22:57,323 --> 00:22:58,683 Er, 600 00:22:58,723 --> 00:23:01,243 a total fucking liability. 601 00:23:02,363 --> 00:23:04,723 What was he like with you? 602 00:23:04,763 --> 00:23:06,563 He left when I was born. 603 00:23:07,643 --> 00:23:09,603 Erm, he used to pop round on birthdays. 604 00:23:09,643 --> 00:23:10,043 Or what he thought was my birthday. Mum said he never got it right. 605 00:23:10,043 --> 00:23:12,683 Or what he thought was my birthday. Mum said he never got it right. 606 00:23:12,723 --> 00:23:16,043 Last time was Christmas, when I was five. 607 00:23:16,083 --> 00:23:18,043 Erm, he gave me a used football. 608 00:23:18,043 --> 00:23:18,403 Erm, he gave me a used football. 609 00:23:18,443 --> 00:23:21,003 And never saw him again. 610 00:23:21,043 --> 00:23:22,963 Yeah, he loved football. 611 00:23:23,003 --> 00:23:26,043 Promised to teach me and our Ronnie but never got round to it. 612 00:23:29,203 --> 00:23:32,203 He didn't leave because of you, you know. 613 00:23:33,563 --> 00:23:34,043 You don't know that. No I do. 614 00:23:34,043 --> 00:23:35,923 You don't know that. No I do. 615 00:23:35,963 --> 00:23:38,603 I do because I felt exactly the same, 616 00:23:39,683 --> 00:23:42,043 until I realised it's never about us. 617 00:23:42,043 --> 00:23:42,323 until I realised it's never about us. 618 00:23:42,363 --> 00:23:44,083 Always about them. Cheers. 619 00:23:45,043 --> 00:23:47,923 He left because he's a shit dad. 620 00:23:49,803 --> 00:23:50,043 But, we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him. 621 00:23:50,043 --> 00:23:52,723 But, we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him. 622 00:23:52,763 --> 00:23:55,683 So, to shit dads. 623 00:23:55,723 --> 00:23:57,363 To shit dads- 624 00:23:57,403 --> 00:23:58,043 No. No. No. 625 00:23:58,043 --> 00:23:58,443 No. No. No. 626 00:23:58,483 --> 00:23:59,803 To our shit dad. 627 00:24:01,043 --> 00:24:02,283 Cheers. 628 00:24:08,163 --> 00:24:11,523 It's like Narnia. No entry, no entry. 629 00:24:11,563 --> 00:24:14,043 Less of the fucking noise, you bloody lemon heads. Come on. 630 00:24:14,043 --> 00:24:14,963 Less of the fucking noise, you bloody lemon heads. Come on. 631 00:24:15,003 --> 00:24:17,123 This is the quickest way boys. 632 00:24:17,163 --> 00:24:19,883 Just smash our way out the back. Yeah? 633 00:24:19,923 --> 00:24:22,043 Erin was shitting herself. 634 00:24:22,043 --> 00:24:22,243 Erin was shitting herself. 635 00:24:22,283 --> 00:24:24,763 I thought I'd fucking killed him that's why. 636 00:24:24,803 --> 00:24:27,163 She went over to him a few times for good measure, 637 00:24:27,203 --> 00:24:29,603 just to make sure the job was done. 638 00:24:29,643 --> 00:24:30,043 Your face! 639 00:24:30,043 --> 00:24:30,963 Your face! 640 00:24:31,003 --> 00:24:33,763 Right, no, listen right, yes, 641 00:24:33,803 --> 00:24:36,283 I accidentally run over his head a few times. 642 00:24:36,323 --> 00:24:38,043 That is true. It's true. 643 00:24:38,043 --> 00:24:38,523 That is true. It's true. 644 00:24:38,563 --> 00:24:40,563 It was really funny. It fucking was not funny! 645 00:24:41,523 --> 00:24:44,963 Fucking hell. And then you buried him when he was still alive? 646 00:24:45,003 --> 00:24:46,043 No. No. No. We didn't know he was still alive, like. 647 00:24:46,043 --> 00:24:47,723 No. No. No. We didn't know he was still alive, like. 648 00:24:47,763 --> 00:24:49,163 We're not psychopaths. 649 00:24:49,203 --> 00:24:52,163 Look, look, all you need to know right, 650 00:24:52,203 --> 00:24:54,043 we didn't, we didn't kill anybody. 651 00:24:54,043 --> 00:24:54,083 we didn't, we didn't kill anybody. 652 00:24:54,123 --> 00:24:56,003 Shush. 653 00:24:56,043 --> 00:24:57,883 So Keithy's fine then? 654 00:25:00,283 --> 00:25:02,043 It was roped off because it was poisonous. 655 00:25:02,043 --> 00:25:03,283 It was roped off because it was poisonous. 656 00:25:03,323 --> 00:25:04,843 Oh no, no, no, no. The door, the door... 657 00:25:04,883 --> 00:25:07,043 It's basically roped off because it was poisonous. 658 00:25:07,083 --> 00:25:09,323 Jeez. Man. Yep. Thanks JJ. I'm aware of that now. 659 00:25:09,363 --> 00:25:10,043 Itching. Oh man, my knee is on fire. It burns so much . 660 00:25:10,043 --> 00:25:12,203 Itching. Oh man, my knee is on fire. It burns so much . 661 00:25:12,243 --> 00:25:13,923 Wait, will ya? 662 00:25:14,963 --> 00:25:16,843 This is worse than crabs... 663 00:25:17,843 --> 00:25:18,043 Oh fuck me. Oh shit! 664 00:25:18,043 --> 00:25:20,363 Oh fuck me. Oh shit! 665 00:25:20,403 --> 00:25:23,603 You lads fucked with the wrong guy 666 00:25:23,643 --> 00:25:25,483 at the wrong time... 667 00:25:25,523 --> 00:25:26,043 ..with the wrong rose bush. 668 00:25:26,043 --> 00:25:27,083 ..with the wrong rose bush. 669 00:25:27,123 --> 00:25:28,683 Eh? Who the fuck are you dude? 670 00:25:28,723 --> 00:25:31,203 What you wearing, man? Camouflaged with bloody high viz. 671 00:25:31,243 --> 00:25:32,403 Do you wanna to be seen or not? 672 00:25:32,443 --> 00:25:34,043 Shut up you fucking flumped- just give us the bush back. 673 00:25:34,043 --> 00:25:35,083 Shut up you fucking flumped- just give us the bush back. 674 00:25:35,123 --> 00:25:37,803 I'm dead sorry, but I'd love to, but we really fucking need it, man. 675 00:25:37,843 --> 00:25:39,683 Don't want you to give me it back anyway. 676 00:25:39,723 --> 00:25:42,043 Cos it means I get to use... this. 677 00:25:42,043 --> 00:25:42,763 Cos it means I get to use... this. 678 00:25:46,083 --> 00:25:47,923 Oh fuck me. Hey, oh. 679 00:25:47,963 --> 00:25:49,763 That's a flashbang? Yeah it's a flashbang. 680 00:25:49,803 --> 00:25:50,043 Dude, that is a flashbang. Where'd you get a fucking flashbang from? 681 00:25:50,043 --> 00:25:52,523 Dude, that is a flashbang. Where'd you get a fucking flashbang from? 682 00:25:52,563 --> 00:25:55,763 This. I got it from Bitcoin, motherfucker. 683 00:25:55,803 --> 00:25:58,043 Bitcoin, what he on about? Dickhead. 684 00:25:58,043 --> 00:25:58,323 Bitcoin, what he on about? Dickhead. 685 00:25:58,363 --> 00:26:00,483 - From bitcoin? - It's in Peterborough in't it. 686 00:26:00,523 --> 00:26:02,323 He said from Bitcoin. It's a Krypso current. 687 00:26:02,363 --> 00:26:05,163 It's a current, a basic exchange. It isn't a shop. Bitcoin isn't a shop. 688 00:26:05,203 --> 00:26:06,043 You just google it. Yeah like a data. 689 00:26:06,043 --> 00:26:06,643 You just google it. Yeah like a data. 690 00:26:06,683 --> 00:26:08,403 Yeah you get to bid on anonymous thing. 691 00:26:08,443 --> 00:26:10,523 It's quite fun actually- Anyway shut the fuck up. 692 00:26:10,563 --> 00:26:12,283 It's not a tea party. 693 00:26:12,323 --> 00:26:14,043 I'm a bad arse motherfucker. I'm about to blow your asses up. 694 00:26:14,043 --> 00:26:15,323 I'm a bad arse motherfucker. I'm about to blow your asses up. 695 00:26:15,363 --> 00:26:17,483 I don't think you are a badass motherfucker. 696 00:26:17,523 --> 00:26:19,803 I mean you might be a bit of a strange young man. 697 00:26:19,843 --> 00:26:21,363 Shut up man. I'm badass! 698 00:26:21,403 --> 00:26:22,043 You're not badass. I am fucking badass. 699 00:26:22,043 --> 00:26:23,603 You're not badass. I am fucking badass. 700 00:26:25,163 --> 00:26:26,283 It's going down. 701 00:26:26,323 --> 00:26:28,723 I don't think you should throw it. No. No. No. No! 702 00:26:30,043 --> 00:26:34,003 Fucking hell. Army overload. 703 00:26:46,003 --> 00:26:46,043 Not so fast. Oh I made a mistake. 704 00:26:46,043 --> 00:26:48,523 Not so fast. Oh I made a mistake. 705 00:26:50,443 --> 00:26:53,883 Hello? Hello. I'm here. I'm here. 706 00:26:53,923 --> 00:26:54,043 Take that bush. Oi. 707 00:26:54,043 --> 00:26:55,883 Take that bush. Oi. 708 00:26:55,923 --> 00:26:58,363 Are you alright? I am here. Hello? 709 00:26:58,403 --> 00:26:59,923 Oi. Oi. I've fucked myself. 710 00:26:59,963 --> 00:27:01,683 I know. I've totally fucked myself. 711 00:27:01,723 --> 00:27:02,043 Oi. I know you have. 712 00:27:02,043 --> 00:27:03,323 Oi. I know you have. 713 00:27:03,363 --> 00:27:05,243 Fuck off. Fuck off! 714 00:27:05,283 --> 00:27:06,643 What you slapping me for? 715 00:27:06,683 --> 00:27:08,603 I'll chop you the fuck back. Oi. Settle down. Oi. 716 00:27:08,643 --> 00:27:09,963 Somert's burning. Listen. 717 00:27:10,003 --> 00:27:10,043 I can smell biscuits. I can't hear. Listen. It'll pass. 718 00:27:10,043 --> 00:27:14,123 I can smell biscuits. I can't hear. Listen. It'll pass. 719 00:27:14,163 --> 00:27:16,123 Eh? It'll pass. You'll hear again. 720 00:27:16,163 --> 00:27:18,043 I can't hear anything? I know that. It'll pass. 721 00:27:18,043 --> 00:27:19,203 I can't hear anything? I know that. It'll pass. 722 00:27:19,243 --> 00:27:20,363 You want my address? 723 00:27:20,403 --> 00:27:23,603 I don't want your address- Get hold of that. 724 00:27:23,643 --> 00:27:26,043 I tell you what. I can't taste anything. 725 00:27:26,043 --> 00:27:26,283 I tell you what. I can't taste anything. 726 00:27:26,323 --> 00:27:28,523 Oh God. 727 00:27:28,563 --> 00:27:30,243 Fucking hell. What would Andy Mcnab do? 728 00:27:30,283 --> 00:27:32,043 I'm sorry we're leaving you like this, man. 729 00:27:32,083 --> 00:27:33,883 This is not how we like to do it. 730 00:27:33,923 --> 00:27:34,043 Fucking hell. 731 00:27:34,043 --> 00:27:35,723 Fucking hell. 732 00:27:35,763 --> 00:27:37,923 I've just done my territorial application. 733 00:27:37,963 --> 00:27:39,603 Have ya? Just... Fucking hell. 734 00:27:39,643 --> 00:27:42,043 Let's just leave him. Don't tell anyone about the night. 735 00:27:42,043 --> 00:27:42,323 Let's just leave him. Don't tell anyone about the night. 736 00:27:42,363 --> 00:27:43,923 I won't. Alright cheers lads. 737 00:27:43,963 --> 00:27:45,643 Alright dude. Sorry. Bring it home. 738 00:27:45,683 --> 00:27:47,723 Bring it home. I'm on a beach. 739 00:27:47,763 --> 00:27:50,043 We sail on the beach. Think of your training. 740 00:27:50,043 --> 00:27:50,403 We sail on the beach. Think of your training. 741 00:27:50,443 --> 00:27:52,003 I can feel the water on me fins. 742 00:27:54,083 --> 00:27:55,763 Oh, so good. 743 00:27:58,883 --> 00:28:00,843 Sorry. You're one of us! 744 00:28:00,883 --> 00:28:02,683 Babe. I hate that dress. 745 00:28:05,203 --> 00:28:06,043 Did you have a good night? 746 00:28:06,043 --> 00:28:06,843 Did you have a good night? 747 00:28:07,763 --> 00:28:10,523 I've had the best fucking night. 748 00:28:16,323 --> 00:28:17,483 Oh shit. Oh no. 749 00:28:17,523 --> 00:28:19,363 Not in the chips. Outside. Outside. Quick. 750 00:28:19,403 --> 00:28:21,483 Don't you nick my chips, you cheeky bitch. 751 00:28:21,523 --> 00:28:22,043 I will eat your chips, you cheeky cow. 752 00:28:22,043 --> 00:28:23,603 I will eat your chips, you cheeky cow. 753 00:28:23,643 --> 00:28:25,883 Pavement pizza, it is? 754 00:28:28,763 --> 00:28:30,043 Oh my God. 755 00:28:30,043 --> 00:28:30,683 Oh my God. 756 00:28:30,723 --> 00:28:32,803 How come you haven't got a hangover? 757 00:28:32,843 --> 00:28:37,323 Honestly, I feel like a bomb has just exploded inside my head. 758 00:28:38,443 --> 00:28:40,883 I don't think I've got anything left in me. 759 00:28:43,203 --> 00:28:45,683 Oh, I hope you don't mind? Tyler said he wanted some sausages. 760 00:28:45,723 --> 00:28:46,043 There's plenty left? No. No. 761 00:28:46,043 --> 00:28:47,883 There's plenty left? No. No. 762 00:28:47,923 --> 00:28:50,283 I just want a cup of tea and I want some paracetamol. 763 00:28:50,323 --> 00:28:51,723 Oh, let me. 764 00:28:51,763 --> 00:28:54,043 In that cupboard there, next to the plasters. 765 00:28:54,043 --> 00:28:54,243 In that cupboard there, next to the plasters. 766 00:28:55,203 --> 00:28:56,803 So is Amy my aunty? 767 00:28:59,963 --> 00:29:01,843 Yeah. Yeah. She is. 768 00:29:01,883 --> 00:29:02,043 Brill. Her sausages are well better than yours. 769 00:29:02,043 --> 00:29:04,843 Brill. Her sausages are well better than yours. 770 00:29:04,883 --> 00:29:06,683 Oi. 771 00:29:06,723 --> 00:29:09,763 Cheeky thing. Go and pack your school bag. Go on. 772 00:29:11,083 --> 00:29:14,083 I still haven't sorted out Tyler's cakes for the fundraiser. 773 00:29:14,123 --> 00:29:15,363 Well you've got me to help. 774 00:29:15,403 --> 00:29:18,043 Although I am absolutely shite at baking. 775 00:29:18,043 --> 00:29:18,563 Although I am absolutely shite at baking. 776 00:29:18,603 --> 00:29:20,603 Spoken like a true Croft. 777 00:29:21,643 --> 00:29:23,723 No I just hate letting him down, you know. 778 00:29:23,763 --> 00:29:26,043 I told you not to call me at work, you stupid cow. 779 00:29:26,043 --> 00:29:26,203 I told you not to call me at work, you stupid cow. 780 00:29:27,443 --> 00:29:29,323 Oh my God. 781 00:29:29,363 --> 00:29:31,003 Do you know him? No. 782 00:29:33,683 --> 00:29:34,043 Amy? 783 00:29:34,043 --> 00:29:35,083 Amy? 784 00:29:35,123 --> 00:29:37,003 I'm In The Mood For Ska # 785 00:29:42,003 --> 00:29:42,043 Go. Go. Go! 786 00:29:42,043 --> 00:29:43,323 Go. Go. Go! 787 00:29:51,003 --> 00:29:52,243 Last one. 788 00:29:53,643 --> 00:29:55,843 Hmm. I've got somert for you. 789 00:30:01,243 --> 00:30:03,083 It's dad's old wallet. 790 00:30:03,123 --> 00:30:05,963 I mean he was an arsehole. But you should have something of his. 791 00:30:07,083 --> 00:30:08,883 Are you sure? 792 00:30:08,923 --> 00:30:10,083 Yeah. 793 00:30:15,323 --> 00:30:17,963 That's Dad with me and our Ronnie in Blackpool. 794 00:30:19,883 --> 00:30:21,443 God we loved it there. 795 00:30:24,283 --> 00:30:25,643 Thank you. 796 00:30:30,163 --> 00:30:31,563 You OK?? 797 00:30:31,603 --> 00:30:33,443 Yeah. 798 00:30:33,483 --> 00:30:37,363 It's just weird, you know, seeing him with another family. 799 00:30:39,723 --> 00:30:41,083 Come here. 800 00:30:44,283 --> 00:30:46,043 Daydream # 801 00:30:46,043 --> 00:30:46,603 Daydream # 802 00:30:48,643 --> 00:30:50,523 Can you pass me that by there? 803 00:30:52,123 --> 00:30:54,043 Oh he's done it! 804 00:30:54,043 --> 00:30:54,163 Oh he's done it! 805 00:30:57,243 --> 00:31:01,323 # Dreamin' 'bout my bundle of joy 806 00:31:04,883 --> 00:31:06,363 Fuck you Linda. 807 00:31:06,403 --> 00:31:07,923 It's three quid to get in Vinnie. 808 00:31:07,963 --> 00:31:10,043 No dude, no. Three quid. 809 00:31:10,043 --> 00:31:10,803 No dude, no. Three quid. 810 00:31:10,843 --> 00:31:13,483 It's not... Listen now. You listen here. 811 00:31:13,523 --> 00:31:15,883 I've been out to fucking get drinks. Are you gonna pay up? 812 00:31:15,923 --> 00:31:17,843 Or do I need to get management over? 813 00:31:17,883 --> 00:31:18,043 Piece of work Linda. A piece of work. 814 00:31:18,043 --> 00:31:19,963 Piece of work Linda. A piece of work. 815 00:31:20,003 --> 00:31:21,483 You're... A... 816 00:31:21,523 --> 00:31:23,243 Piece of work... 817 00:31:23,283 --> 00:31:24,443 You... Knob head. 818 00:31:27,163 --> 00:31:28,443 You love me really. 819 00:31:28,483 --> 00:31:29,483 I do love you. 820 00:31:29,523 --> 00:31:32,003 Can you bring me a lemonade when you're done? No. 821 00:31:32,043 --> 00:31:34,043 Get your lovely fucking chickens. 822 00:31:34,043 --> 00:31:35,323 Get your lovely fucking chickens. 823 00:31:35,363 --> 00:31:38,643 Fresh eggs in the morning and all that shit. 824 00:31:38,683 --> 00:31:40,523 Oi, stop shouting fucking chickens. 825 00:31:40,563 --> 00:31:42,043 There's one child right there. You dickhead. 826 00:31:42,043 --> 00:31:42,803 There's one child right there. You dickhead. 827 00:31:42,843 --> 00:31:45,803 And you can't sell all these chickens for 40 fucking quid? 828 00:31:45,843 --> 00:31:46,963 40 quid each. 829 00:31:47,003 --> 00:31:50,043 You can't sell a chicken for 40 quid dude. It's ridiculous! 830 00:31:50,043 --> 00:31:50,523 You can't sell a chicken for 40 quid dude. It's ridiculous! 831 00:31:50,563 --> 00:31:52,603 Chickens for 40 pounds? Oh come 'ed. 832 00:31:54,043 --> 00:31:55,603 I've been after some chickens. 833 00:31:56,883 --> 00:31:58,043 Er... I grow my own potatoes. 834 00:31:58,043 --> 00:31:58,443 Er... I grow my own potatoes. 835 00:31:58,483 --> 00:32:00,723 Of course you fucking do. 836 00:32:00,763 --> 00:32:03,603 And I bet they taste fucking magical. 837 00:32:03,643 --> 00:32:06,043 Now then, you're gonna need at least six, 838 00:32:06,043 --> 00:32:06,683 Now then, you're gonna need at least six, 839 00:32:06,723 --> 00:32:08,203 if you wanna do this properly. 840 00:32:08,243 --> 00:32:10,443 Because chickens are pack animals. 841 00:32:10,483 --> 00:32:13,323 And you don't want them pinning for each other. 842 00:32:13,363 --> 00:32:14,043 I don't need any specialist equipment, do I? 843 00:32:14,043 --> 00:32:15,163 I don't need any specialist equipment, do I? 844 00:32:15,203 --> 00:32:17,163 For chickens? No. 845 00:32:17,203 --> 00:32:20,523 They'll be happy in a cardboard box in the garage. 846 00:32:20,563 --> 00:32:22,043 Well I have both of those. 847 00:32:22,043 --> 00:32:22,243 Well I have both of those. 848 00:32:22,283 --> 00:32:24,363 So I'll take all six. 849 00:32:24,403 --> 00:32:26,683 Do you take cards? Cards? 850 00:32:26,723 --> 00:32:29,963 Do I look like a fucking pop-up taco van? 851 00:32:30,003 --> 00:32:30,043 No. 852 00:32:30,043 --> 00:32:31,003 No. 853 00:32:31,043 --> 00:32:34,643 Great British Pound notes, is what I want in my hand, 854 00:32:34,683 --> 00:32:38,043 not some piece of fucking plastic made in China 855 00:32:38,043 --> 00:32:38,283 not some piece of fucking plastic made in China 856 00:32:38,323 --> 00:32:40,363 that tells Bill Fucking Gates 857 00:32:40,403 --> 00:32:42,163 and them other space cunts 858 00:32:42,203 --> 00:32:44,963 when I last had a pint and a pasty. 859 00:32:47,203 --> 00:32:48,803 I'll er, pick them up later? 860 00:32:49,963 --> 00:32:51,203 Thank you, Sir. 861 00:32:52,643 --> 00:32:53,803 Fucking easy. 862 00:32:53,843 --> 00:32:54,043 Fucking gob shite. 863 00:32:54,043 --> 00:32:55,443 Fucking gob shite. 864 00:32:55,483 --> 00:32:56,923 Hey, his chickens are cunts. 865 00:32:56,963 --> 00:32:58,963 Oi, his chickens are cunts. 866 00:32:59,003 --> 00:33:01,163 Stop shouting cunts! 867 00:33:01,203 --> 00:33:02,043 That cunt started it. 868 00:33:02,043 --> 00:33:02,363 That cunt started it. 869 00:33:03,163 --> 00:33:05,043 Fuck bro, this looks really depressing. 870 00:33:05,083 --> 00:33:06,603 S-s-suspiciously Cheap Meat? 871 00:33:06,643 --> 00:33:07,963 It's a joke. 872 00:33:08,003 --> 00:33:09,523 Because I'm an undertaker. 873 00:33:10,843 --> 00:33:13,403 So they'll think they're buying burgers made from dead nannas. 874 00:33:13,443 --> 00:33:15,483 And have you sold much, have you? 875 00:33:15,523 --> 00:33:16,643 None. 876 00:33:16,683 --> 00:33:18,043 It's not lucky then is it. Gross. 877 00:33:18,043 --> 00:33:18,283 It's not lucky then is it. Gross. 878 00:33:18,323 --> 00:33:21,163 It's not really made of n-n-nanna mince, though are they? 879 00:33:21,203 --> 00:33:22,243 Do you know what I mean...? 880 00:33:22,283 --> 00:33:24,163 Actually d-don't answer that. We'll have two. 881 00:33:24,203 --> 00:33:26,043 What's this a mince bag? Mince bag? Mince bag? 882 00:33:26,043 --> 00:33:27,723 What's this a mince bag? Mince bag? Mince bag? 883 00:33:27,763 --> 00:33:28,883 What the fuck is a mince bag? 884 00:33:28,923 --> 00:33:32,803 Who puts an entire human amount of mince in a bag? 885 00:33:32,843 --> 00:33:34,043 Think about it. 886 00:33:34,043 --> 00:33:34,283 Think about it. 887 00:33:34,323 --> 00:33:36,123 It's a... 888 00:33:36,163 --> 00:33:38,283 Body bag? There you go... 889 00:33:38,323 --> 00:33:40,403 Don't just go senselessly naming things. Mince bag? 890 00:33:40,443 --> 00:33:41,603 Fuck me. Alright. 891 00:33:41,643 --> 00:33:42,043 It's still a weird fucking thing to bring to a fundraiser, 892 00:33:42,043 --> 00:33:43,923 It's still a weird fucking thing to bring to a fundraiser, 893 00:33:43,963 --> 00:33:45,963 innit, you know what I mean? It's a body bag dude. 894 00:33:46,003 --> 00:33:47,123 Look at Pat. 895 00:33:48,283 --> 00:33:50,043 She's fucked. 896 00:33:50,083 --> 00:33:51,803 There is business everywhere, my friend. 897 00:33:52,763 --> 00:33:54,603 Business everywhere. 898 00:33:54,643 --> 00:33:57,203 Don't you throw cheese at me. Throw cheese. Throw cheese at him. 899 00:33:57,243 --> 00:33:58,043 Get away from me you dick. I'm taking a doughnut. 900 00:33:58,043 --> 00:33:59,163 Get away from me you dick. I'm taking a doughnut. 901 00:33:59,203 --> 00:34:00,803 What you talking about? That's bread. 902 00:34:00,843 --> 00:34:02,203 Fuck off! 903 00:34:02,243 --> 00:34:03,923 Fuck off! 904 00:34:03,963 --> 00:34:06,043 Oh, I'm going now. 905 00:34:06,043 --> 00:34:06,083 Oh, I'm going now. 906 00:34:06,123 --> 00:34:07,523 Thank you Gary. 907 00:34:07,563 --> 00:34:10,283 It's ridiculous. That one's got a sore arse. Vin. 908 00:34:17,603 --> 00:34:19,603 Oh you made it. 909 00:34:19,643 --> 00:34:22,043 Of course we did Sandra. Wouldn't miss it for the world. 910 00:34:22,043 --> 00:34:22,403 Of course we did Sandra. Wouldn't miss it for the world. 911 00:34:22,443 --> 00:34:24,443 Why they here? I don't know. 912 00:34:24,483 --> 00:34:26,163 Our Barry loves a tombola. 913 00:34:27,163 --> 00:34:29,843 Won a whole Dundee cake, once. 914 00:34:34,563 --> 00:34:37,243 Great success. Great success. Oh yes. 915 00:34:37,283 --> 00:34:38,043 Thank you very much. Thank you very much. Thanks Ames. 916 00:34:38,043 --> 00:34:39,603 Thank you very much. Thank you very much. Thanks Ames. 917 00:34:39,643 --> 00:34:41,243 How much did you take in the end? 918 00:34:41,283 --> 00:34:44,043 Er, 15 hundred, 32 pound, 919 00:34:44,083 --> 00:34:46,043 20p and three buttons. 920 00:34:46,043 --> 00:34:46,563 20p and three buttons. 921 00:34:46,603 --> 00:34:48,403 What arsehole gave you buttons? 922 00:34:48,443 --> 00:34:50,003 Who do you think? Shirley? 923 00:34:50,043 --> 00:34:51,563 Yep. Oh prick. 924 00:34:51,603 --> 00:34:53,123 I know, dickhead. 925 00:34:53,163 --> 00:34:54,043 Oh shit! 926 00:34:54,043 --> 00:34:54,603 Oh shit! 927 00:34:54,643 --> 00:34:56,083 Oh Sugar! 928 00:34:59,963 --> 00:35:01,803 What's that. Amy and your dad? 929 00:35:03,203 --> 00:35:04,483 Except it isn't, is it? 930 00:35:09,203 --> 00:35:10,043 What's going on? 931 00:35:10,043 --> 00:35:10,203 What's going on? 932 00:35:12,163 --> 00:35:13,723 Have you been lying to me? 933 00:35:16,483 --> 00:35:17,923 No I... 934 00:35:17,963 --> 00:35:18,043 I-I didn't know and then... 935 00:35:18,043 --> 00:35:19,963 I-I didn't know and then... 936 00:35:21,283 --> 00:35:23,843 ..saw the photo in your dad's wallet. 937 00:35:23,883 --> 00:35:26,043 One minute. So you saw the picture of my Dad, 938 00:35:26,043 --> 00:35:26,483 One minute. So you saw the picture of my Dad, 939 00:35:26,523 --> 00:35:29,203 you realised it wasn't the same guy 940 00:35:29,243 --> 00:35:31,843 and, and you didn't say anything? No, it wasn't like that. I tried- 941 00:35:31,883 --> 00:35:34,043 You could have told me the truth but you-you chose not to. 942 00:35:34,043 --> 00:35:34,123 You could have told me the truth but you-you chose not to. 943 00:35:34,163 --> 00:35:36,563 No I tried. But Tyler was there and I was... 944 00:35:36,603 --> 00:35:39,003 I wanted to tell you, but I... See I trusted you. 945 00:35:40,363 --> 00:35:42,043 I let you into my home, 946 00:35:42,043 --> 00:35:42,523 I let you into my home, 947 00:35:42,563 --> 00:35:45,443 and Tyler, and you were taking the piss out of me? 948 00:35:46,803 --> 00:35:48,043 I just... 949 00:35:49,443 --> 00:35:50,043 ..I didn't want it to not be true. 950 00:35:50,043 --> 00:35:51,363 ..I didn't want it to not be true. 951 00:35:55,483 --> 00:35:57,123 Well it's not true is it? 952 00:35:59,963 --> 00:36:01,843 You're just some fucking stranger aren't ya. 953 00:36:01,883 --> 00:36:04,043 Why, why have I got such a shit family? 954 00:36:04,083 --> 00:36:05,323 Seriously! 955 00:36:05,363 --> 00:36:06,043 I've got a shit dad, shit brother, shi... 956 00:36:06,043 --> 00:36:07,763 I've got a shit dad, shit brother, shi... 957 00:36:09,083 --> 00:36:10,323 ..shit... 958 00:36:11,763 --> 00:36:13,163 ..shit you. 959 00:36:19,123 --> 00:36:20,603 Oh, you fucker. 960 00:36:22,483 --> 00:36:24,523 What the fuck is that, JJ? 961 00:36:24,563 --> 00:36:27,963 Alright. You said you wanted Shakespeare's Sister Roses! 962 00:36:28,003 --> 00:36:30,043 In a bouquet, you melt, not the fucking shrub. 963 00:36:30,043 --> 00:36:31,723 In a bouquet, you melt, not the fucking shrub. 964 00:36:31,763 --> 00:36:34,323 I'm getting married in three days 965 00:36:34,363 --> 00:36:36,923 and I don't need this kind of fucking stress! 966 00:36:36,963 --> 00:36:37,963 Arsehole. Ohh. 967 00:36:38,003 --> 00:36:38,043 Dude you've just gone all Deidre Barlow, you're that cross. 968 00:36:38,043 --> 00:36:40,603 Dude you've just gone all Deidre Barlow, you're that cross. 969 00:36:40,643 --> 00:36:41,883 Chill out a bit. 970 00:36:41,923 --> 00:36:44,243 He's worked his arse off getting these roses here. Yeah. 971 00:36:44,283 --> 00:36:46,043 His thigh beard and gooch is just riddled in rash. 972 00:36:46,043 --> 00:36:47,363 His thigh beard and gooch is just riddled in rash. 973 00:36:47,403 --> 00:36:48,683 Terrible, it's fierce! 974 00:36:48,723 --> 00:36:51,603 Yeah. Alright mate listen. Let me just handle this. Very sore. 975 00:36:51,643 --> 00:36:53,723 OK. Hey. 976 00:36:53,763 --> 00:36:54,043 Do you want them or not? 977 00:36:54,043 --> 00:36:55,003 Do you want them or not? 978 00:36:55,043 --> 00:36:56,643 No. 979 00:36:57,603 --> 00:37:00,603 Vin, will you pop in Barraclough Road into the sat nav for me please. 980 00:37:00,643 --> 00:37:02,043 Absolutely I will. 981 00:37:02,043 --> 00:37:02,163 Absolutely I will. 982 00:37:02,203 --> 00:37:03,843 Barraclough Road? 983 00:37:03,883 --> 00:37:06,603 Oh yeah. Shivani Paswan wants a look as well. 984 00:37:06,643 --> 00:37:09,523 That little bastard. No chance. How much? 985 00:37:11,043 --> 00:37:12,763 It's five grand. Like I said. 986 00:37:14,003 --> 00:37:16,563 And I want everything. Even the roots. 987 00:37:16,603 --> 00:37:17,963 She's not growing her own bush 988 00:37:18,003 --> 00:37:18,043 and waving it about at my baby's Namakarana Sanskar. 989 00:37:18,043 --> 00:37:20,883 and waving it about at my baby's Namakarana Sanskar. 990 00:37:20,923 --> 00:37:23,203 Hurry up then. Move! 991 00:37:23,243 --> 00:37:24,523 Alright Uncle. 992 00:37:24,563 --> 00:37:26,043 She's fucking horrible dude. You poor bastard. 993 00:37:26,043 --> 00:37:27,043 She's fucking horrible dude. You poor bastard. 994 00:37:30,363 --> 00:37:32,203 Yeah, she's here in park. 995 00:37:32,243 --> 00:37:34,043 Right. See you soon. 996 00:37:34,043 --> 00:37:34,083 Right. See you soon. 997 00:37:36,643 --> 00:37:38,683 Vin's on his way. 998 00:37:40,083 --> 00:37:42,043 It's good news though. He's got the money for the community centre, 999 00:37:42,043 --> 00:37:44,483 It's good news though. He's got the money for the community centre, 1000 00:37:44,523 --> 00:37:45,883 so... That's good. 1001 00:37:51,323 --> 00:37:53,043 You can't blame your life choices. 1002 00:37:53,083 --> 00:37:55,923 No. Not really. 1003 00:37:57,443 --> 00:37:58,043 Remember that story that I told ya. 1004 00:37:58,043 --> 00:37:59,723 Remember that story that I told ya. 1005 00:37:59,763 --> 00:38:02,603 When I was little and my dad asked me what I wanted for my birthday. 1006 00:38:03,563 --> 00:38:05,163 Do you remember what I said? 1007 00:38:05,203 --> 00:38:06,043 - Baby sister. - Yeah. 1008 00:38:06,043 --> 00:38:06,963 - Baby sister. - Yeah. 1009 00:38:08,363 --> 00:38:09,603 Yeah. 1010 00:38:12,043 --> 00:38:14,003 Obviously, it was never going to happen, I mean, 1011 00:38:14,043 --> 00:38:15,843 he fucked off for God sake. 1012 00:38:20,323 --> 00:38:21,883 But Amy came along... 1013 00:38:24,723 --> 00:38:26,083 And suddenly it didn't- 1014 00:38:26,123 --> 00:38:28,483 it didn't matter you know, how much of a dickhead he'd was, 1015 00:38:28,523 --> 00:38:29,803 when I was growing up. 1016 00:38:31,403 --> 00:38:33,643 Because at least my dad gave me her. 1017 00:38:33,683 --> 00:38:36,883 Are you positive that Amy just didn't make a mistake? 1018 00:38:39,443 --> 00:38:42,163 You know, it's not like none of us, 1019 00:38:42,203 --> 00:38:43,523 have ever made mistakes before. 1020 00:38:50,283 --> 00:38:52,443 I just let myself believe it, you know. 1021 00:38:54,083 --> 00:38:56,243 Just carried away with the whole thing. 1022 00:38:58,683 --> 00:39:01,723 That's what I'm saying, this random moment has happened 1023 00:39:01,763 --> 00:39:02,043 and-and you've gone with it. It's a good thing, you know. 1024 00:39:02,043 --> 00:39:04,603 and-and you've gone with it. It's a good thing, you know. 1025 00:39:04,643 --> 00:39:07,443 You found this girl, you wanted her to be part of your life. 1026 00:39:07,483 --> 00:39:10,043 It's not a mistake. That's a connection with someone. 1027 00:39:10,043 --> 00:39:10,643 It's not a mistake. That's a connection with someone. 1028 00:39:17,563 --> 00:39:18,043 Do you think she's gone? 1029 00:39:18,043 --> 00:39:18,923 Do you think she's gone? 1030 00:39:21,203 --> 00:39:22,563 Well... 1031 00:39:24,683 --> 00:39:26,043 ..there's only one way to find out. 1032 00:39:26,043 --> 00:39:26,483 ..there's only one way to find out. 1033 00:39:31,483 --> 00:39:32,883 Coming? 1034 00:39:32,923 --> 00:39:34,043 Erm... 1035 00:39:34,043 --> 00:39:34,163 Erm... 1036 00:39:36,003 --> 00:39:37,243 ..nah you should go with Vin. 1037 00:39:38,723 --> 00:39:41,043 I- I'm gonna take a walk. 1038 00:39:41,083 --> 00:39:42,043 OK. 1039 00:39:42,043 --> 00:39:42,643 OK. 1040 00:40:07,443 --> 00:40:08,763 Two min. 1041 00:40:14,243 --> 00:40:16,483 I've called a taxi. I'll be out your hair soon. 1042 00:40:17,603 --> 00:40:20,203 Come and wait inside. It's freezing. 1043 00:40:20,243 --> 00:40:21,963 Come on. 1044 00:40:30,883 --> 00:40:33,843 I swear to God, I thought you were my Erin Croft. 1045 00:40:37,043 --> 00:40:38,043 Your dad's name was Neil, you were the right age. 1046 00:40:38,043 --> 00:40:39,163 Your dad's name was Neil, you were the right age. 1047 00:40:39,203 --> 00:40:40,563 We look alike. 1048 00:40:43,083 --> 00:40:44,923 It was only when I saw the photo, I... 1049 00:40:46,723 --> 00:40:48,363 ..I realised I'd got it wrong. 1050 00:40:55,243 --> 00:40:57,243 When I first found out I had a sister, 1051 00:40:58,323 --> 00:41:01,403 I kind of imagined what she might be like. 1052 00:41:04,163 --> 00:41:06,363 And then I met you. 1053 00:41:06,403 --> 00:41:09,963 And I just... I couldn't believe how lucky I was. 1054 00:41:10,003 --> 00:41:10,043 After having no one. 1055 00:41:10,043 --> 00:41:11,683 After having no one. 1056 00:41:17,643 --> 00:41:18,043 I'm really sorry. 1057 00:41:18,043 --> 00:41:19,003 I'm really sorry. 1058 00:41:23,883 --> 00:41:25,203 I'm sorry. 1059 00:41:27,963 --> 00:41:30,643 I'm not the only one in this but I made it about me. 1060 00:41:32,763 --> 00:41:34,043 And I shouldn't have said the things I said to you. 1061 00:41:34,043 --> 00:41:35,163 And I shouldn't have said the things I said to you. 1062 00:41:36,883 --> 00:41:38,683 I was a dickhead. 1063 00:41:38,723 --> 00:41:40,603 I was scared and defensive. 1064 00:41:42,603 --> 00:41:44,363 You don't have to leave, you know. 1065 00:41:46,283 --> 00:41:47,683 I don't want you to leave. 1066 00:41:49,523 --> 00:41:50,043 I don't really wanna either. 1067 00:41:50,043 --> 00:41:51,203 I don't really wanna either. 1068 00:41:55,243 --> 00:41:58,043 But there is another Erin Croft out there and I want to find her. 1069 00:41:58,043 --> 00:41:58,803 But there is another Erin Croft out there and I want to find her. 1070 00:42:01,523 --> 00:42:03,563 She's the only family I've got left. 1071 00:42:09,523 --> 00:42:11,283 I wish you were my real sister. 1072 00:42:14,043 --> 00:42:16,243 Me too. Come here. 1073 00:42:22,163 --> 00:42:23,203 Come on. 1074 00:42:25,963 --> 00:42:27,003 Amy. 1075 00:42:28,243 --> 00:42:30,003 You might not have any family here now, 1076 00:42:31,323 --> 00:42:34,363 but you do have friends, OK? Thank you. 1077 00:42:35,883 --> 00:42:37,883 Oh will you er, 1078 00:42:37,923 --> 00:42:38,043 give this to Tyler when he gets back from Albie's? 1079 00:42:38,043 --> 00:42:40,643 give this to Tyler when he gets back from Albie's? 1080 00:42:43,323 --> 00:42:46,003 And this is erm... This is for you. 1081 00:42:47,243 --> 00:42:48,403 Thanks. 1082 00:42:50,523 --> 00:42:52,203 Look after yourself, yeah. 1083 00:42:53,563 --> 00:42:54,043 Thanks. 1084 00:42:54,043 --> 00:42:55,043 Thanks. 1085 00:42:55,083 --> 00:42:57,483 Pictures Of You # 1086 00:42:57,523 --> 00:43:00,443 # ..at these pictures of you 1087 00:43:00,483 --> 00:43:02,043 # That I almost believe that they're real 1088 00:43:02,043 --> 00:43:05,563 # That I almost believe that they're real 1089 00:43:06,723 --> 00:43:10,043 # I've been living so long with my pictures of you 1090 00:43:10,043 --> 00:43:11,683 # I've been living so long with my pictures of you 1091 00:43:11,723 --> 00:43:16,443 # That I almost believe that the pictures 1092 00:43:16,483 --> 00:43:18,043 # Are all I can feel ... # 1093 00:43:18,043 --> 00:43:19,323 # Are all I can feel ... # 1094 00:43:25,123 --> 00:43:26,043 They run a Murder Mystery night once a month, 1095 00:43:26,043 --> 00:43:26,923 They run a Murder Mystery night once a month, 1096 00:43:26,963 --> 00:43:29,003 you'd have access to the entire house. 1097 00:43:29,043 --> 00:43:30,563 These old things are solid. 1098 00:43:30,603 --> 00:43:32,563 You're all playing fucking parts here... 1099 00:43:32,603 --> 00:43:34,043 He cries when he masturbates. 1100 00:43:34,043 --> 00:43:35,203 He cries when he masturbates. 1101 00:43:35,243 --> 00:43:37,243 Could he be the murderer? 1102 00:43:37,283 --> 00:43:40,243 I'd like you to host a poker night for some friends of mine. 1103 00:43:40,283 --> 00:43:41,803 Sod off. Sod off leave me alone. 1104 00:43:42,803 --> 00:43:44,643 Ah a secret book door. 1105 00:43:46,043 --> 00:43:48,283 Don't panic. I'm just gonna- 1106 00:43:48,323 --> 00:43:50,043 AccessibleCustomerService@sky.uk 1107 00:43:50,043 --> 00:43:51,723 AccessibleCustomerService@sky.uk