1 00:00:01,393 --> 00:00:04,728 -♪ Look up there ♪ -♪ What do you see? ♪ 2 00:00:04,747 --> 00:00:05,987 ♪ Nature and stuff ♪ 3 00:00:06,007 --> 00:00:07,655 -♪ Like a rock ♪ -♪ And a tree ♪ 4 00:00:07,733 --> 00:00:10,400 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 5 00:00:10,402 --> 00:00:13,570 ♪ Way up here, you can breathe the air ♪ 6 00:00:13,663 --> 00:00:15,014 ♪ Catch some fish ♪ 7 00:00:15,165 --> 00:00:16,757 ♪ Or gaze at a bear ♪ 8 00:00:16,851 --> 00:00:17,683 ♪ Wow ♪ 9 00:00:17,834 --> 00:00:21,020 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 10 00:00:21,247 --> 00:00:22,337 ♪ Here we live, oh, oh ♪ 11 00:00:22,431 --> 00:00:24,005 ♪ Here we'll stay, oh, whoo ♪ 12 00:00:24,099 --> 00:00:26,025 ♪ From longest night to longest day ♪ 13 00:00:26,101 --> 00:00:29,403 ♪ In the Great North. ♪ 14 00:00:31,848 --> 00:00:33,757 (cheering) 15 00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:36,610 Welcome aboard the Death Moose Caboose. 16 00:00:36,686 --> 00:00:40,097 Now departing for a traditional weekend "Log and Hog." 17 00:00:40,266 --> 00:00:41,540 First stop, the Log Museum, 18 00:00:41,691 --> 00:00:43,116 followed by gorging all-we-can-gorge 19 00:00:43,269 --> 00:00:45,118 at the Gluttony Gulch Buffet. 20 00:00:45,271 --> 00:00:47,454 HONEYBEE: Now, why do they call the area we're going to Death Moose? 21 00:00:47,531 --> 00:00:48,622 Are there dead moose everywhere? 22 00:00:48,716 --> 00:00:50,440 Wait, am I saying that right? 23 00:00:50,459 --> 00:00:51,216 Is "moose" plural? 24 00:00:51,368 --> 00:00:53,719 Mooses seems very wrong. Mooses. 25 00:00:53,870 --> 00:00:55,295 Mooses. Mooses. 26 00:00:55,447 --> 00:00:57,389 It's only named that because it's exactly halfway 27 00:00:57,616 --> 00:00:59,374 between Death Cliff and Lone Moose. 28 00:00:59,468 --> 00:01:02,286 It's a small strip of basically abandoned roadside shops 29 00:01:02,304 --> 00:01:03,395 set back and hidden by trees. 30 00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:05,138 And if you didn't already know it was there, 31 00:01:05,232 --> 00:01:06,790 you would never find it. 32 00:01:06,883 --> 00:01:08,233 That's why it's so perfect because we usually get 33 00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:10,051 Gluttony Gulch Buffet all to ourselves. 34 00:01:10,129 --> 00:01:11,570 That way no one has to witness 35 00:01:11,721 --> 00:01:13,146 how gross we all are at buffets, 36 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:14,981 because we are monsters. 37 00:01:15,134 --> 00:01:17,576 I'm gonna make myself so sick. 38 00:01:17,727 --> 00:01:19,152 Well, you won't get any judgement from me 39 00:01:19,246 --> 00:01:20,412 about your buffet style. 40 00:01:20,564 --> 00:01:21,896 I know my way around a smorgasbord. 41 00:01:21,957 --> 00:01:23,473 Look, look, look, look, look, look, look. 42 00:01:23,492 --> 00:01:25,417 I lined my purse with tinfoil for leftovers. 43 00:01:25,494 --> 00:01:27,586 I'm gonna fill this thing up with lasagna 44 00:01:27,663 --> 00:01:29,070 and up here, crab rangoon. 45 00:01:29,090 --> 00:01:31,331 Before we fill our mouth holes with buffet foods, 46 00:01:31,408 --> 00:01:33,834 let's fill our brain holes with log knowledge. 47 00:01:33,928 --> 00:01:35,344 Oop. Here we go. 48 00:01:36,913 --> 00:01:38,322 Hello, logs. 49 00:01:38,456 --> 00:01:40,599 (snoring) 50 00:01:40,768 --> 00:01:42,993 Aw. He's asleep. 51 00:01:43,011 --> 00:01:44,328 Oh, sorry. (mutters) 52 00:01:44,346 --> 00:01:45,829 Hope I wasn't sawing logs. 53 00:01:45,848 --> 00:01:47,940 I could accidentally ruin the museum. 54 00:01:48,091 --> 00:01:49,015 (both laughing) 55 00:01:49,092 --> 00:01:50,609 Oh, good, log jokes. 56 00:01:50,719 --> 00:01:51,926 Maybe I'll wait in the car. 57 00:01:52,004 --> 00:01:53,112 Well, and what do we have here? 58 00:01:53,339 --> 00:01:54,613 It's the Tobin twigs and berries. 59 00:01:54,731 --> 00:01:57,116 That's not what... That's not what that means. 60 00:01:57,267 --> 00:01:59,100 And, Horton, may I introduce Honeybee. 61 00:01:59,120 --> 00:02:00,677 She's... (imitating Borat): my wife. 62 00:02:00,696 --> 00:02:02,512 Ugh, babe, what did we say? 63 00:02:02,531 --> 00:02:04,698 (normal voice): Sorry, to make sure I also say... 64 00:02:04,850 --> 00:02:06,032 (imitating Borat): She's nice. 65 00:02:06,201 --> 00:02:07,459 (laughing) There it is. 66 00:02:07,536 --> 00:02:09,611 All right, we are ready for some hardcore 67 00:02:09,630 --> 00:02:11,797 log museum-ing, right, gang? 68 00:02:11,948 --> 00:02:13,023 Oh, they-they walked away. 69 00:02:13,116 --> 00:02:14,449 Well, museum's all yours. 70 00:02:14,543 --> 00:02:17,952 Oh, and, Beef, make sure you really savor today's visit. 71 00:02:18,046 --> 00:02:19,787 -Okay? -I always do. 72 00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:23,291 Let's get a closer look-see at this baby log-see. 73 00:02:23,310 --> 00:02:26,127 Oh, this twig's got me under her spell. 74 00:02:26,147 --> 00:02:29,206 (chuckles) Uh-oh, I feel a twig jig coming on. 75 00:02:29,299 --> 00:02:31,633 Clear the dance floor, I'm gonna do my twig jig. 76 00:02:31,727 --> 00:02:34,820 (laughs) Oh. Nobody's looking at me. I-I'm not gonna do it. 77 00:02:34,971 --> 00:02:36,897 Whee! 78 00:02:37,049 --> 00:02:40,066 (sighs) All of the thrills, none of the moisture. 79 00:02:40,219 --> 00:02:42,386 These are... fun, 80 00:02:42,479 --> 00:02:44,905 -but is ChewBarka missing an eye? -HAM: Yeah. 81 00:02:45,057 --> 00:02:47,391 He used to have two, but now I pretend he's winking. 82 00:02:47,409 --> 00:02:50,335 -Oh, wow, very... -Don't worry, Honeybee, 83 00:02:50,487 --> 00:02:52,838 you don't have to pretend to be interested in the logs. 84 00:02:53,065 --> 00:02:54,322 We're really just here for these. 85 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:55,899 Technically, each patron is only allowed one 86 00:02:55,992 --> 00:02:57,584 chocolate-covered pretzel log per visit, 87 00:02:57,753 --> 00:03:00,086 but if Mr. Horton doesn't see you eat them... 88 00:03:00,239 --> 00:03:02,681 That dude just keeps refilling the jar. 89 00:03:02,908 --> 00:03:05,909 Okay. Yeah, I'm in. These things are my whole life now. 90 00:03:05,911 --> 00:03:09,413 Sorry the kids always eat all your chocolate logs, Horton, 91 00:03:09,431 --> 00:03:11,081 and sorry they're not better at hiding it. 92 00:03:11,174 --> 00:03:13,433 Ah, you know me, Beef, I'm a pushover. 93 00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:15,602 Hard for me to say no to anyone who loves my museum. 94 00:03:15,754 --> 00:03:18,605 What's not to enjoy? I mean, come on, look at this. 95 00:03:18,757 --> 00:03:21,425 So many of the wood world's brightest stars, 96 00:03:21,518 --> 00:03:23,368 including the pièce de résistance, 97 00:03:23,520 --> 00:03:24,536 Cocobolo, 98 00:03:24,763 --> 00:03:27,781 the single most stunning log in the world. 99 00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:29,933 It's like Mother Earth made the oceans 100 00:03:30,102 --> 00:03:31,376 and the land and then thought, 101 00:03:31,528 --> 00:03:33,212 "You know what? I'm gonna make something just for me," 102 00:03:33,439 --> 00:03:34,862 and then someone chopped it up 103 00:03:34,957 --> 00:03:38,124 and brought it right here for us to see with our unworthy eyes. 104 00:03:38,277 --> 00:03:40,277 I know how you feel about the logs, Beef, 105 00:03:40,295 --> 00:03:42,870 and that's why it's so hard for me to tell you that, 106 00:03:42,965 --> 00:03:45,131 well, I have to close the museum. 107 00:03:45,284 --> 00:03:47,226 -You shut your filthy log hole. -(yelps) 108 00:03:47,377 --> 00:03:49,302 Oh, sorry. Are you joking? 109 00:03:49,504 --> 00:03:51,471 Nope. My 50-year ground lease is up, 110 00:03:51,623 --> 00:03:54,382 and the owner sold the literal ground out from under me. 111 00:03:54,551 --> 00:03:56,460 This is our last week, Beef. I'm sorry. 112 00:03:56,478 --> 00:03:58,386 I know how much this place means to you. 113 00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:01,556 Horton, no, I'm not ready to log off yet. 114 00:04:01,633 --> 00:04:03,742 (groans) I didn't mean to be playful like that. 115 00:04:03,969 --> 00:04:05,318 I'm actually very upset. 116 00:04:05,412 --> 00:04:06,987 WOLF: Look at him over there, Honeybee. 117 00:04:07,081 --> 00:04:10,064 He's absolutely crushed about the ding darn museum. 118 00:04:10,084 --> 00:04:11,899 Only getting soup at a buffet? 119 00:04:11,994 --> 00:04:13,493 It's the saddest thing I can think of. 120 00:04:13,645 --> 00:04:16,146 They don't even serve soup. That's just orange juice 121 00:04:16,239 --> 00:04:17,330 in a bowl. (sighs) 122 00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:18,832 I don't know what to do. I mean, 123 00:04:18,984 --> 00:04:20,166 he freaking loves the Log Museum. 124 00:04:20,261 --> 00:04:21,501 Honestly, I'm not sure if he'll be able 125 00:04:21,595 --> 00:04:23,003 to recover from losing it. 126 00:04:23,097 --> 00:04:25,171 I mean, losing Mom was one thing, but logs? 127 00:04:25,266 --> 00:04:28,216 Um, Wolf, what, uh, what're you doing there? 128 00:04:28,994 --> 00:04:29,935 This is how I make salad. 129 00:04:30,086 --> 00:04:31,586 Sweet baby cheeses, 130 00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:33,163 you really are disgusting buffet people. 131 00:04:33,181 --> 00:04:35,165 Dad used to make me wear buffet coveralls, 132 00:04:35,183 --> 00:04:36,608 so I have improved a little bit. 133 00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:38,110 Now, I got to add some crunch. 134 00:04:38,279 --> 00:04:41,095 Okay, strawberry soft serve, macaroni and cheese, 135 00:04:41,264 --> 00:04:42,447 chicken nuggets, ketchup, 136 00:04:42,599 --> 00:04:44,449 now to stir them all together and... 137 00:04:44,601 --> 00:04:47,769 Uh-oh, Debbie's here. My friend who is also my bully. 138 00:04:47,863 --> 00:04:49,513 Should I say hi? Or just 139 00:04:49,531 --> 00:04:52,774 walk away very-- Oh, no, she saw me. 140 00:04:52,868 --> 00:04:53,941 Oh, no, I saw her... 141 00:04:54,036 --> 00:04:56,378 playing with a doll. 142 00:04:57,372 --> 00:04:59,356 RUSSELL: Moon, what did you do? 143 00:04:59,374 --> 00:05:01,616 I saw Debbie playing with a doll. 144 00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:03,451 Oh, God, and what's a pee punch? 145 00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:04,970 Oh, she's been developing that for years. 146 00:05:05,121 --> 00:05:07,714 It's when she punches you in the bladder and you pee yourself. 147 00:05:07,866 --> 00:05:10,142 Well, I'm sad it's happening, but also glad 148 00:05:10,369 --> 00:05:11,885 that she hasn't developed the poop punch. 149 00:05:12,037 --> 00:05:14,629 Oh, yeah, you should be, 'cause she told me she's close. 150 00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:17,207 Shall we retire to our conference room, gentlemen, 151 00:05:17,225 --> 00:05:18,725 and figure out how to get Moon into 152 00:05:18,877 --> 00:05:20,560 the pee punch protection program? 153 00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:23,304 Okay, so this is very, very bad. 154 00:05:23,324 --> 00:05:25,215 There's no way she's gonna back down. 155 00:05:25,233 --> 00:05:27,717 We all know what Debbie's like when she gets embarrassed. 156 00:05:27,736 --> 00:05:30,829 Remember when her mom bought her that Princess Pony lunchbox, 157 00:05:30,998 --> 00:05:32,497 and she filed for emancipation? 158 00:05:32,649 --> 00:05:34,315 Or the time she tripped in the school entryway 159 00:05:34,393 --> 00:05:35,725 and had the whole school's office staff 160 00:05:35,819 --> 00:05:37,410 arrested on bogus drug charges. 161 00:05:37,563 --> 00:05:39,746 We've always known this is the game we were playing with her. 162 00:05:39,898 --> 00:05:42,341 She's already so embarrassed just to have friends. 163 00:05:42,492 --> 00:05:44,176 Maybe you should tell Judy and Ham. 164 00:05:44,403 --> 00:05:45,752 They could protect you. They're big. 165 00:05:45,904 --> 00:05:47,495 No way. I'm not gonna tattletale. 166 00:05:47,589 --> 00:05:49,014 Moon's right. He can't tell anyone. 167 00:05:49,241 --> 00:05:50,574 I've seen this kind of thing before, 168 00:05:50,667 --> 00:05:52,166 and it's only going to get worse the more people he tells. 169 00:05:52,186 --> 00:05:54,019 Yeah, it's bad enough that you both know. 170 00:05:54,246 --> 00:05:55,762 We absolutely cannot tell anyone else. 171 00:05:55,914 --> 00:05:58,339 Everyone loves money. Maybe you can just pay her off. 172 00:05:58,433 --> 00:06:00,359 I like it. Empty your pockets and backpacks, gentlemen. 173 00:06:00,552 --> 00:06:02,343 Okay, looks like we have ten dollars, 174 00:06:02,437 --> 00:06:05,364 12 cents, and a 30% off coupon for Fudgey Town 175 00:06:05,591 --> 00:06:06,773 with a nice drawing of Fudgey the Snail. 176 00:06:06,925 --> 00:06:08,533 I'm not allowed to go there anymore. 177 00:06:08,726 --> 00:06:10,093 I ate some turned fudge once 178 00:06:10,112 --> 00:06:11,536 and then diarrhea-ed so profoundly 179 00:06:11,763 --> 00:06:14,781 that they actually studied me at the Anchorage Medical Center. 180 00:06:14,933 --> 00:06:16,041 I'm in a textbook. 181 00:06:16,268 --> 00:06:17,617 Pretty sure this'll change her mind. 182 00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:19,527 Moon, you have to practice what you're going to say. 183 00:06:19,621 --> 00:06:22,047 Just don't remind her of the D-O-L-L. 184 00:06:22,198 --> 00:06:23,289 Keep it short and sweet, 'kay? 185 00:06:23,384 --> 00:06:25,308 Like when I text my mom's boyfriend, Jamie, 186 00:06:25,368 --> 00:06:27,219 the smiley face emoji with the sunglasses. 187 00:06:27,370 --> 00:06:30,204 It's just one cool guy saying, "Hey, you're a cool guy," 188 00:06:30,224 --> 00:06:31,973 to another cool guy. 189 00:06:35,303 --> 00:06:38,471 Well, hello, Professor John Nash from A Beautiful Mind. 190 00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:40,624 You look rad as hell with that calculator. 191 00:06:40,717 --> 00:06:43,476 I'm trying to figure out how to save the Log Museum. 192 00:06:43,629 --> 00:06:45,553 I started by looking into how much it would cost 193 00:06:45,647 --> 00:06:47,647 to move the whole building on one of those trucks. 194 00:06:47,799 --> 00:06:51,410 We could do it if we don't use hot water for... ever, 195 00:06:51,561 --> 00:06:53,528 and also sell the hot water heater 196 00:06:53,639 --> 00:06:55,989 and the van and all of our furniture 197 00:06:56,141 --> 00:06:58,475 and the house. So... 198 00:06:58,493 --> 00:07:00,735 Dad, I know how much you love the Log Museum, 199 00:07:00,829 --> 00:07:02,570 but sometimes love just isn't enough. 200 00:07:02,589 --> 00:07:03,905 Mm-hmm. He's right, Beef. 201 00:07:03,999 --> 00:07:06,316 My neighbor Denise in Fresno loved her boss so much 202 00:07:06,409 --> 00:07:08,075 she ended up getting fired and herpes. 203 00:07:08,095 --> 00:07:09,076 You just need 204 00:07:09,096 --> 00:07:11,096 -to let it go. -(sighs) 205 00:07:11,247 --> 00:07:13,080 Hey, what do you say we take one more trip 206 00:07:13,100 --> 00:07:14,916 over to Death Moose to say goodbye? 207 00:07:14,993 --> 00:07:16,268 -I'd like that. -Me, too. 208 00:07:16,419 --> 00:07:19,012 My esophagus is just a little chocolate log flume now. 209 00:07:19,164 --> 00:07:20,272 MOON: Hello, Debbie. 210 00:07:20,499 --> 00:07:22,423 What do you want, Elbow Face? 211 00:07:22,443 --> 00:07:24,609 Perhaps in exchange for not beating me up, 212 00:07:24,761 --> 00:07:28,262 I could offer you these ten dollars and this 12 cents. 213 00:07:28,356 --> 00:07:30,282 Would you like to accept my proposal? 214 00:07:30,433 --> 00:07:31,524 (growls) 215 00:07:31,677 --> 00:07:34,344 And, um, just to be clear, well, you know, 216 00:07:34,346 --> 00:07:37,013 I definitely didn't see anything you were doing with dolls 217 00:07:37,106 --> 00:07:38,439 at Gluttony Gulch in Death Moose. 218 00:07:38,459 --> 00:07:39,941 No, no, no, no. 219 00:07:40,035 --> 00:07:41,275 It didn't even look that much 220 00:07:41,295 --> 00:07:42,869 like you. I mean, maybe you have a long lost 221 00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:44,278 twin you've never met. (laughs nervously) 222 00:07:44,298 --> 00:07:45,947 Did you ever go to summer camp? 223 00:07:46,041 --> 00:07:47,632 Oh, thanks for the money. 224 00:07:47,859 --> 00:07:50,543 Now I'll be even richer when I pee punch you. 225 00:07:50,696 --> 00:07:52,787 Why did you keep talking? We went over this. 226 00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:55,548 I know, I know, I know, but she didn't say anything, 227 00:07:55,701 --> 00:07:57,701 and I got nervous and I just kept talking. 228 00:07:57,719 --> 00:08:00,220 When I get nervous, my whole body smells like feet, 229 00:08:00,314 --> 00:08:03,464 but not my feet, which is the weird part. 230 00:08:04,467 --> 00:08:06,151 There still has to be a logical way out of this. 231 00:08:06,378 --> 00:08:07,727 -Let's brainstorm. -Okay. 232 00:08:07,879 --> 00:08:10,380 Maybe we... Hm, I don't know, paint your face green, 233 00:08:10,398 --> 00:08:12,232 bury you up to your neck in my mom's garden, 234 00:08:12,326 --> 00:08:13,566 and pretend you're a head of lettuce? 235 00:08:13,719 --> 00:08:15,494 Uh-huh, that's a good start. I don't mind dirt. 236 00:08:15,645 --> 00:08:18,071 Maybe you can get a bigger bully to scare her off. 237 00:08:18,165 --> 00:08:19,313 There are no bigger bullies. 238 00:08:19,333 --> 00:08:21,333 She's the tip-top of the bully food chain. 239 00:08:21,484 --> 00:08:24,336 She's above high schoolers. She's above Gargamel. 240 00:08:24,563 --> 00:08:26,654 Oh, I know. We can go to Jamie's boxing gym and-- 241 00:08:26,748 --> 00:08:29,749 Oh, shoot. I just remembered, Jamie's in Salt Lake City 242 00:08:29,901 --> 00:08:31,325 for the Toot-A-Loo Flute Festival. 243 00:08:31,494 --> 00:08:34,571 He said maybe next year me and my mom and my brother 244 00:08:34,664 --> 00:08:37,164 could go with him, and I could be his flute caddie. 245 00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:38,591 -Can you imagine? -Levon! 246 00:08:38,668 --> 00:08:41,520 Stop pretending those dodgeballs are your butt cheeks. 247 00:08:41,747 --> 00:08:43,688 Am I gonna have to send you to the principal's office again? 248 00:08:43,915 --> 00:08:47,341 Oh, Robbie! Stop slow dancing with the climbing rope. 249 00:08:47,361 --> 00:08:50,362 It's beautiful, but it's not on the curriculum. 250 00:08:50,589 --> 00:08:51,421 -Huh. -What? 251 00:08:51,439 --> 00:08:53,273 Coach Kiely was mad at Levon, 252 00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:54,849 but then Robbie did something bad... 253 00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:56,551 I see what you're getting at. We just need to shift 254 00:08:56,611 --> 00:08:59,262 Debbie's anger for you onto someone else. 255 00:08:59,281 --> 00:09:01,188 Yup. Then she'll be more mad at them, 256 00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:03,449 and she'll forget about how mad she is at me. 257 00:09:03,618 --> 00:09:05,785 -Bravo. It's genius. -RUSSELL: You guys want to see 258 00:09:05,937 --> 00:09:07,437 my flute caddie walk? 259 00:09:07,455 --> 00:09:09,289 (whistling) 260 00:09:10,217 --> 00:09:14,110 Hello, Horton. I won't be long. I just wanted to say goodbye. 261 00:09:14,203 --> 00:09:15,870 Course, Beef. I understand. 262 00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:17,556 And, Beef, no rules today. 263 00:09:17,783 --> 00:09:19,206 If you want to touch the cocobolo log, 264 00:09:19,301 --> 00:09:20,466 I'll turn the other way. 265 00:09:20,561 --> 00:09:22,468 Do you want me to put on white gloves first? 266 00:09:22,621 --> 00:09:24,954 I keep some in the car in case this day ever came. 267 00:09:24,973 --> 00:09:26,898 No, Beef, not necessary. 268 00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:29,717 Hello, handsome. 269 00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:31,218 Oh, sweet Suddenly Susan, 270 00:09:31,313 --> 00:09:34,406 it's so smooth, naturally oily to the touch, 271 00:09:34,633 --> 00:09:36,908 which of course is common for the tropical hardwoods 272 00:09:37,060 --> 00:09:39,135 of Central America. The grain... 273 00:09:39,228 --> 00:09:41,729 It's perfect. (gasps) 274 00:09:41,898 --> 00:09:43,473 Logs. Of course. 275 00:09:43,566 --> 00:09:46,810 (chuckles) You knew how to save yourselves all along. 276 00:09:46,828 --> 00:09:48,753 Honeybee, Wolf, Horton, come here! 277 00:09:48,980 --> 00:09:51,072 Look, the stone blocks for the pyramids 278 00:09:51,166 --> 00:09:52,924 were too heavy to move by hand, 279 00:09:53,076 --> 00:09:55,168 so they rolled them on logs. 280 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:58,488 We can't keep the museum on the land it currently rests on, 281 00:09:58,581 --> 00:10:00,599 but we can save the museum itself 282 00:10:00,750 --> 00:10:03,343 by moving it to our property. 283 00:10:03,495 --> 00:10:04,327 Aw, well... 284 00:10:04,346 --> 00:10:05,920 -Uh... -It can stay rent-free 285 00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:07,272 and remain open for everyone. 286 00:10:07,423 --> 00:10:10,108 And I can visit Coco whenever I want. 287 00:10:10,293 --> 00:10:12,018 Do you hear that, Coco?. You're safe now. 288 00:10:12,170 --> 00:10:14,003 Beef, I'm not really sure that's a... 289 00:10:14,097 --> 00:10:15,188 I know it seems complicated, 290 00:10:15,340 --> 00:10:16,506 but I'll figure the whole thing out. 291 00:10:16,599 --> 00:10:18,283 We'll do it exactly like they did back then. 292 00:10:18,468 --> 00:10:20,434 Sick plan, Dad. Count us in. 293 00:10:20,528 --> 00:10:22,695 And, Horton, you keep those chocolate logs coming. 294 00:10:22,864 --> 00:10:24,013 We're gonna need our strength. 295 00:10:24,032 --> 00:10:25,123 Okay, guys, 296 00:10:25,274 --> 00:10:27,459 every time Ms. McNamara supervises lunch, 297 00:10:27,610 --> 00:10:28,852 she walks the cafeteria 298 00:10:28,870 --> 00:10:30,277 eating her raspberry and cottage cheese 299 00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:32,464 mix-'em-up cup. At exactly the right moment, 300 00:10:32,691 --> 00:10:35,041 I'm going to trip her, in a very safe, but very effective way, 301 00:10:35,193 --> 00:10:38,285 so that she spills her raspberry cottage cheese all over Debbie. 302 00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:39,954 That way, Debbie's anger for me 303 00:10:40,048 --> 00:10:42,715 will move over to Ms. McNamara, but lucky for her, 304 00:10:42,868 --> 00:10:44,809 she's an adult and can't be beaten up. 305 00:10:44,961 --> 00:10:46,219 And then my problem is solved. 306 00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:47,720 Okay, but what if you miss? 307 00:10:47,873 --> 00:10:49,147 I won't miss, Henry. 308 00:10:49,298 --> 00:10:51,483 This isn't my first staged tripping. 309 00:10:51,634 --> 00:10:52,984 Go time. 310 00:10:54,212 --> 00:10:55,136 Ah! 311 00:10:55,230 --> 00:10:58,047 (gasps) Oh, my God. You are dead. 312 00:10:58,066 --> 00:11:01,217 Debbie. Oh, no. Oh, I am so, so, so sorry, Debbie. 313 00:11:01,236 --> 00:11:02,735 I don't know what happened. An apple 314 00:11:02,888 --> 00:11:04,996 rolled under my foot somehow, and-- Oh, here. Oh, my gosh, 315 00:11:05,073 --> 00:11:06,164 let me just clean you up. 316 00:11:06,391 --> 00:11:07,557 -Oh, no, no, no, no. -Ms. McNamara, 317 00:11:07,575 --> 00:11:08,983 don't worry at all. 318 00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:11,060 Everyone makes mistakes. Maybe, if you could be so kind, 319 00:11:11,079 --> 00:11:12,729 you could get me some paper towels 320 00:11:12,747 --> 00:11:14,005 -from the janitor's closet? -Oh, yes. Thank you. 321 00:11:14,232 --> 00:11:16,157 Thank you, Debbie. Of course. Everyone out of my way. 322 00:11:16,251 --> 00:11:18,418 -Debbie needs paper towels. -Hi, Moon. 323 00:11:18,512 --> 00:11:20,570 Interesting tactic. 324 00:11:20,663 --> 00:11:23,014 Get me mad at someone else, so I'll forget about you. 325 00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:24,741 I respect it, but it didn't work. 326 00:11:24,759 --> 00:11:26,743 Oh, and just a quick update on what's up with me, 327 00:11:26,836 --> 00:11:30,096 my research on the poop punch has finally paid off. 328 00:11:30,248 --> 00:11:31,672 -(groans) -Okay, new idea, 329 00:11:31,692 --> 00:11:34,175 we slather you in Vaseline, so you're too slippery to fight, 330 00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:35,435 and if she still keeps coming after you, 331 00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:37,362 then we just slide you right into the ocean. 332 00:11:40,442 --> 00:11:42,608 Oh, Moon, great. You're just in time. 333 00:11:42,703 --> 00:11:44,110 We're about to begin. Come on, grab a seat. 334 00:11:44,262 --> 00:11:45,870 Sorry, Dad, no time for sitting. 335 00:11:46,097 --> 00:11:47,597 I've got a prob... ject, 336 00:11:47,615 --> 00:11:50,116 school probject I need to work on tonight. 337 00:11:50,268 --> 00:11:52,952 Say no more. From one projecteur to another, 338 00:11:53,104 --> 00:11:55,196 I wish you luck. 339 00:11:55,215 --> 00:11:57,106 You two know about this probject? 340 00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:58,365 Yeah, we know about it. 341 00:11:58,460 --> 00:12:00,443 We're currently monitoring it from afar. 342 00:12:00,462 --> 00:12:01,611 Listen, when another girl threatens to punch 343 00:12:01,629 --> 00:12:03,204 your little brother, it's best to let him 344 00:12:03,298 --> 00:12:04,797 try to work it out before getting involved. 345 00:12:04,891 --> 00:12:07,467 Especially when you yourself are afraid of said girl. 346 00:12:07,619 --> 00:12:08,393 -Debbie? -Debbie. 347 00:12:08,620 --> 00:12:09,543 Understood. 348 00:12:09,563 --> 00:12:11,212 Now, let's get down to brass logs. 349 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:13,122 I have created a foolproof plan 350 00:12:13,141 --> 00:12:16,309 of how to move the Log Museum here to our property, 351 00:12:16,461 --> 00:12:18,219 where it will be conveniently located 352 00:12:18,238 --> 00:12:19,312 near the family cemetery. 353 00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:21,222 I want our ancestors' spirits 354 00:12:21,299 --> 00:12:22,465 to be able to enjoy the logs. 355 00:12:22,484 --> 00:12:24,558 Okay, but if I see any ghostly Tobins 356 00:12:24,652 --> 00:12:26,970 near my chocolate pretzels, I will kill them again. 357 00:12:26,988 --> 00:12:28,562 Now, first things first. 358 00:12:28,656 --> 00:12:31,082 Junkyard Kyle has kindly agreed to raise the museum structure 359 00:12:31,234 --> 00:12:32,900 and put it on cinder blocks in exchange 360 00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:35,661 for a gallon of vape juice, two old coffee makers, 361 00:12:35,738 --> 00:12:38,147 and Wolf's half-shirt that says, "Who Farted?" 362 00:12:38,166 --> 00:12:39,482 Oh, I'm gonna miss that shirt, 363 00:12:39,501 --> 00:12:42,001 but I got a tank top that says "Fart Loading" 364 00:12:42,170 --> 00:12:43,410 ready to take its place. 365 00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:45,764 And then, we'll attach the tether apparatus 366 00:12:45,991 --> 00:12:49,267 around the museum and to the back of the family van. 367 00:12:49,418 --> 00:12:50,918 I'll pull the museum forward, 368 00:12:51,012 --> 00:12:53,938 and as it passes over each log in the rear, 369 00:12:54,165 --> 00:12:55,348 you guys will lift said log 370 00:12:55,500 --> 00:12:57,667 and move it to the front of the other log. 371 00:12:57,760 --> 00:12:59,502 And, of course, this must all be done 372 00:12:59,521 --> 00:13:02,113 in the dead of night when there won't be any cars on the roads. 373 00:13:02,265 --> 00:13:04,282 Now, I'm usually not one to be tooting horns, 374 00:13:04,509 --> 00:13:08,102 but, uh, a-tooty-too-toot, this plan is perfection. 375 00:13:08,196 --> 00:13:09,436 What else can we roll over here? 376 00:13:09,531 --> 00:13:11,623 Can we get a Dave & Busters on the premises? 377 00:13:13,627 --> 00:13:15,018 Oh, boy. 378 00:13:15,036 --> 00:13:16,686 Hey, Moon, um... 379 00:13:16,704 --> 00:13:20,948 So... I may have inadvertently fixed your Debbie problem. 380 00:13:21,042 --> 00:13:22,133 Really? How? 381 00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:23,468 Well, you know how I do 382 00:13:23,619 --> 00:13:25,452 my weekly check-ins with Principal Gibbons 383 00:13:25,588 --> 00:13:27,880 because I'm head of the Junior Janitors? 384 00:13:28,033 --> 00:13:29,290 -Yeah. -Well... 385 00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:31,551 I may have been doing that weekly check-in 386 00:13:31,703 --> 00:13:33,886 and everything about Debbie may have kind of 387 00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,721 totally accidentally come spilling out. 388 00:13:35,874 --> 00:13:36,889 You ratted? 389 00:13:37,042 --> 00:13:38,799 GIBBONS (over P.A.): Will Moon Tobin 390 00:13:38,968 --> 00:13:40,301 and Debbie Van please come to the principal's office. 391 00:13:40,395 --> 00:13:42,061 Would you be less mad if I told you 392 00:13:42,213 --> 00:13:44,489 he has Andes after-dinner mints on his desk this week? 393 00:13:44,716 --> 00:13:46,732 No? Okay, bye. (whimpers) 394 00:13:46,885 --> 00:13:48,384 Now, Debbie, what is this I hear 395 00:13:48,553 --> 00:13:51,312 about you saying you're gonna beat up Moon on Friday? 396 00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:55,224 Oh, yeah, I did say that, but it's because I... 397 00:13:55,243 --> 00:13:56,726 -have a crush on him. -GIBBONS: Oh. 398 00:13:56,744 --> 00:14:00,063 Of course, yes. Romantic feelings at your age 399 00:14:00,081 --> 00:14:01,747 can be very confusing. 400 00:14:01,824 --> 00:14:03,824 Yeah. Totally. So sorry. 401 00:14:03,918 --> 00:14:06,419 Moon, would you like to share anything? 402 00:14:06,537 --> 00:14:10,073 -Mm-mm. -Well, feeling shy is also perfectly normal. 403 00:14:10,091 --> 00:14:11,741 You guys can head back to class. 404 00:14:11,759 --> 00:14:14,077 Thank you so much. I've sure learned my lesson. 405 00:14:14,095 --> 00:14:15,687 -And, Moon. -Yeah? 406 00:14:15,838 --> 00:14:18,672 Take it easy on Debbie, okay? She's in new territory here. 407 00:14:18,808 --> 00:14:21,100 Yup, I'll take it easy on Debbie. 408 00:14:21,194 --> 00:14:22,268 Sure thing. 409 00:14:22,420 --> 00:14:24,604 -(gasps) -You listen to me, Pajanimal, 410 00:14:24,698 --> 00:14:27,256 you messed up big time trying to get me in trouble. 411 00:14:27,350 --> 00:14:29,442 It wasn't me. Russell told Principal Gibbons... 412 00:14:29,594 --> 00:14:31,611 Well, your plan backfired because now 413 00:14:31,705 --> 00:14:34,447 I'm going to do a pee punch and a double poop punch. 414 00:14:34,599 --> 00:14:36,374 So, first, you'll pee out the front. 415 00:14:36,543 --> 00:14:38,859 Then you'll poop out the back. Then you'll poop out the front. 416 00:14:38,879 --> 00:14:41,880 (gasps) That's not possible. 417 00:14:42,107 --> 00:14:45,291 A pee pee. A poo poo. A poo poo. 418 00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:46,275 (sighs) 419 00:14:46,369 --> 00:14:48,444 All right, time to figure out 420 00:14:48,537 --> 00:14:51,114 how to sneak into the wheel well of a 747. 421 00:14:51,132 --> 00:14:53,540 Hey, Moon, how's the, uh... 422 00:14:53,635 --> 00:14:56,636 school project coming? Uh... 423 00:14:56,730 --> 00:14:58,396 You know, son, if I didn't know any better, 424 00:14:58,623 --> 00:15:01,382 I'd swear that you've attempted to change your appearance 425 00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:03,142 and are now planning to go on the lam 426 00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:05,144 so that a certain frenemy doesn't punch you. 427 00:15:05,238 --> 00:15:07,906 Great guess, but don't try to stop me. 428 00:15:08,057 --> 00:15:09,148 This is the only way now. 429 00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:10,816 Well, I'm sure you're right. 430 00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:12,577 Do you have everything packed that you need? 431 00:15:12,728 --> 00:15:15,154 Yup, just need to burn off my fingerprints 432 00:15:15,306 --> 00:15:16,563 and eat my SIM card. 433 00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:18,307 Wonderful. Now, before you run away 434 00:15:18,401 --> 00:15:20,977 and live a life of adventure walking the highway 435 00:15:21,070 --> 00:15:22,569 and hustling pinball at truck stops, 436 00:15:22,664 --> 00:15:24,497 I wonder if you can just take one more look 437 00:15:24,573 --> 00:15:26,499 at your problem from a different angle. 438 00:15:26,651 --> 00:15:29,427 You might find the answer is closer than you think. 439 00:15:29,578 --> 00:15:31,745 Like, no one was threatening to beat me up this week, 440 00:15:31,765 --> 00:15:33,322 but my heart felt beat up 441 00:15:33,341 --> 00:15:35,174 about the Log Museum closing. 442 00:15:35,326 --> 00:15:36,993 My problem was logs, 443 00:15:37,011 --> 00:15:39,270 and it turned out my solution was also logs. 444 00:15:39,497 --> 00:15:41,422 Maybe your solution is right in front of you, 445 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:42,756 and you just don't know it. 446 00:15:42,850 --> 00:15:45,017 So, give it a think before you head out and never 447 00:15:45,170 --> 00:15:46,669 see us again, okay, bud? 448 00:15:46,762 --> 00:15:48,838 Hm... My problem is Debbie. 449 00:15:48,898 --> 00:15:51,190 Maybe my solution is also Debbie. 450 00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:54,268 Dad, is it okay if I walk over to the Van's house? 451 00:15:54,362 --> 00:15:56,788 Sure, just take the emergency phone 452 00:15:56,864 --> 00:15:57,938 and stay on the path. 453 00:15:58,032 --> 00:15:59,123 I carved that path. 454 00:15:59,350 --> 00:16:01,542 I'm not gonna abandon it now. 455 00:16:02,537 --> 00:16:04,629 Hello, Debbie's mom. 456 00:16:07,801 --> 00:16:10,392 Hi, Moon. I'm sorry, but Debbie isn't here right now. 457 00:16:10,394 --> 00:16:12,453 She's at the ice rink-- Uh-oh, I know that face. 458 00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:14,046 Is Debbie planning to beat you up? 459 00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:15,531 You could tell that just from my face? 460 00:16:15,624 --> 00:16:17,958 Ugh, she threatens to beat people up pretty often. 461 00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:19,960 Just last week, her orthodontist showed up here 462 00:16:20,054 --> 00:16:21,721 looking just like you do right now. 463 00:16:21,873 --> 00:16:24,465 -What'd you do? -I saw her with her doll at Gluttony Gulch Buffet. 464 00:16:24,559 --> 00:16:25,299 Yikes. 465 00:16:25,468 --> 00:16:27,134 Why is she so worried about me 466 00:16:27,153 --> 00:16:28,227 seeing her play with a doll? 467 00:16:28,379 --> 00:16:30,046 We all still play with toys at our age. 468 00:16:30,064 --> 00:16:32,231 We don't talk about it, but we know it happens. 469 00:16:32,383 --> 00:16:35,067 Well, it's a little bit my fault, maybe. 470 00:16:35,220 --> 00:16:36,477 I mean, I shouldn't tell you this, 471 00:16:36,496 --> 00:16:38,145 but you look like the kind of small bear 472 00:16:38,239 --> 00:16:39,480 that can keep a secret. 473 00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:40,556 -Is that right? -Yup. 474 00:16:40,575 --> 00:16:42,316 I made Debbie repeat kindergarten. 475 00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:44,243 You held Debbie back? Why? 476 00:16:44,395 --> 00:16:46,170 Well, she was just so tiny back then. 477 00:16:46,397 --> 00:16:47,988 And the first time she did kindergarten, 478 00:16:48,157 --> 00:16:50,008 when we lived in Death Cliff, she got picked on all year. 479 00:16:50,235 --> 00:16:51,658 So, when we moved to Lone Moose, I thought 480 00:16:51,678 --> 00:16:53,327 it'd be a good idea for her to repeat kindergarten, 481 00:16:53,421 --> 00:16:55,013 so she'd be a little bigger. But guess what? 482 00:16:55,181 --> 00:16:57,089 -She hated it. -That's right, Moon. 483 00:16:57,183 --> 00:16:58,407 She wouldn't talk to me for months. 484 00:16:58,501 --> 00:17:00,000 It wasn't until I bought her that doll 485 00:17:00,094 --> 00:17:01,519 that she started calling me Carissa again. 486 00:17:01,670 --> 00:17:04,505 Then we worked our way back to Mom over the next few years, 487 00:17:04,524 --> 00:17:07,025 but the whole incident had some... lasting effects. 488 00:17:07,101 --> 00:17:09,861 She really hates being seen as little in any way. 489 00:17:10,012 --> 00:17:12,179 I see. So, she's not mean. 490 00:17:12,273 --> 00:17:14,014 She's just hurt and kind of scared. 491 00:17:14,034 --> 00:17:16,868 (laughs) Come on, Moon, she's definitely mean. 492 00:17:17,095 --> 00:17:18,761 But, yes, hurt and scared as well. 493 00:17:18,780 --> 00:17:21,539 It's also the reason she wears those darn skates all the time, 494 00:17:21,766 --> 00:17:23,616 so she'll be taller and have weapons on her feet. 495 00:17:23,768 --> 00:17:26,711 Thank you, Mrs. Van. I think I know what to do now. 496 00:17:26,862 --> 00:17:28,454 No need to tell Debbie I was here. 497 00:17:28,606 --> 00:17:30,381 Actually, it's probably better if you don't. 498 00:17:30,533 --> 00:17:31,698 Sure thing, Moon. 499 00:17:31,867 --> 00:17:33,609 Uh-oh. That's gonna be her father dropping her off. 500 00:17:33,628 --> 00:17:35,945 Run, Moon. Cut through the backyard. Jump the fence. 501 00:17:35,963 --> 00:17:38,539 See, Horton, it's working. 502 00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:41,300 The museum will be open for decades to come, 503 00:17:41,377 --> 00:17:43,227 and I can visit you and Coco every day. 504 00:17:43,379 --> 00:17:46,230 That's nice, Beef. That'll be real nice for you. 505 00:17:46,382 --> 00:17:48,140 -But... -(both scream) 506 00:17:48,293 --> 00:17:49,809 Oh, no, it's gonna hit the van. 507 00:17:49,961 --> 00:17:53,145 Oh, no it didn't hit the v-- oh, no, the rope's breaking. 508 00:17:53,298 --> 00:17:55,147 Everyone get away from the museum! 509 00:17:55,316 --> 00:17:56,390 She's gonna break free. 510 00:17:56,559 --> 00:17:57,408 (all yelling) 511 00:17:57,560 --> 00:17:58,892 -No! -Oh, no! 512 00:17:58,912 --> 00:18:00,620 (overlapping yelling) 513 00:18:01,730 --> 00:18:03,306 We can save the museum. 514 00:18:03,399 --> 00:18:04,807 Everyone, just grab some pieces. 515 00:18:04,867 --> 00:18:06,567 We'll rebuild it and make it even better. 516 00:18:06,661 --> 00:18:09,570 It'll be ten stories-- no, 20 stories tall, 517 00:18:09,589 --> 00:18:12,148 -and visitors will come from around the world... -Beef. 518 00:18:12,166 --> 00:18:14,425 Just let it die. It's what I want. 519 00:18:14,652 --> 00:18:16,986 The land lease didn't get sold out from under me. 520 00:18:17,079 --> 00:18:19,079 -I let it expire. -Why? 521 00:18:19,099 --> 00:18:20,414 I'm done, Beef. 522 00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:22,174 The only people that come to the museum anymore 523 00:18:22,327 --> 00:18:24,102 are drifters that need to go number two, 524 00:18:24,329 --> 00:18:25,586 and there's this guy Rodney. 525 00:18:25,605 --> 00:18:27,588 He always tries to put his mouth on a log, 526 00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:30,516 and when I stop him, he accuses me of doing 9/11. 527 00:18:30,685 --> 00:18:32,835 I want to retire to Miami and get a girlfriend. 528 00:18:32,854 --> 00:18:36,114 Maybe a boyfriend. Wear a thong underwear bathing suit. 529 00:18:36,265 --> 00:18:38,116 Feel the sun on my lower cheeks. 530 00:18:38,284 --> 00:18:39,933 I understand, Horton. 531 00:18:39,953 --> 00:18:41,510 Far be it from me to stop a man 532 00:18:41,529 --> 00:18:44,605 that has so honorably served the history of logs 533 00:18:44,699 --> 00:18:45,957 from living out his dream. 534 00:18:46,184 --> 00:18:48,442 Everyone deserves a chance to show off their butt 535 00:18:48,519 --> 00:18:50,353 in their autumn years if they wish. 536 00:18:50,446 --> 00:18:51,445 Now, let me help you. 537 00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:52,797 We need to get Coco out of there, 538 00:18:52,948 --> 00:18:54,357 so he can go to his new home. 539 00:18:54,375 --> 00:18:56,467 He belongs with you, Beef. He always did. 540 00:18:56,619 --> 00:18:59,362 You hear that, buddy? You're coming home with me. 541 00:18:59,455 --> 00:19:02,882 Okay, Moon. Time to pull up or shut up. 542 00:19:03,034 --> 00:19:04,367 (Henry and Russell gasp) 543 00:19:04,385 --> 00:19:06,719 -You can't. -Moon, are you sure? 544 00:19:06,871 --> 00:19:07,870 Yes. 545 00:19:07,963 --> 00:19:08,980 Hey, Debbie. 546 00:19:09,207 --> 00:19:10,723 (students gasp and laugh) 547 00:19:10,875 --> 00:19:11,724 Oh, my gosh. 548 00:19:11,876 --> 00:19:12,984 Um, what the hell 549 00:19:13,135 --> 00:19:14,377 do you think you're doing? 550 00:19:14,395 --> 00:19:16,228 Why are you wearing a diaper? 551 00:19:16,322 --> 00:19:17,897 And holding that stuffed sloth? 552 00:19:18,049 --> 00:19:19,157 His name is Jeremy, 553 00:19:19,384 --> 00:19:20,900 and I'm publicly embarrassing myself 554 00:19:20,994 --> 00:19:22,218 to show you that it doesn't matter 555 00:19:22,236 --> 00:19:23,886 what people think about you. 556 00:19:23,979 --> 00:19:26,146 So what if people think I'm a weirdo baby in a diaper? 557 00:19:26,166 --> 00:19:27,740 You're my friend, Debbie, and it's worth it 558 00:19:27,892 --> 00:19:29,408 to put myself out there to end this. 559 00:19:29,485 --> 00:19:31,836 There's nothing wrong with still being little sometimes 560 00:19:32,063 --> 00:19:33,171 and wanting to play with a doll. 561 00:19:33,398 --> 00:19:34,955 I got Jeremy when I was four, 562 00:19:35,066 --> 00:19:36,916 and I still hold him when I feel scared, 563 00:19:37,068 --> 00:19:39,043 like when I accidentally watched The Purge, 564 00:19:39,195 --> 00:19:41,512 and then when I watched all the sequels on purpose. 565 00:19:41,664 --> 00:19:43,830 Personally, I think your doll is cool, 566 00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:46,242 and I would never pick on you for being small. 567 00:19:46,260 --> 00:19:47,834 Oh, thank you so much. 568 00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:50,354 That was such a great speech, Keith Bore-ison, 569 00:19:50,506 --> 00:19:53,416 but I have never even been embarrassed in my entire life. 570 00:19:53,509 --> 00:19:54,600 And I don't own a doll. 571 00:19:54,752 --> 00:19:56,585 And I'm not little, and I never have been. 572 00:19:56,604 --> 00:19:58,512 When I came out of my mom's vagina, 573 00:19:58,531 --> 00:19:59,939 which was also very big, 574 00:20:00,091 --> 00:20:01,273 all the doctors in the hospital fainted 575 00:20:01,426 --> 00:20:03,701 because I was so large and scary. 576 00:20:03,852 --> 00:20:05,036 Okay then, Debbie, 577 00:20:05,279 --> 00:20:07,688 proceed with the pee and poop and double poop punches, 578 00:20:07,740 --> 00:20:11,024 but just remember that, even after I've pooped out my front, 579 00:20:11,044 --> 00:20:12,543 I'll still be your friend. 580 00:20:14,105 --> 00:20:15,771 (grunts) Oh, my God. 581 00:20:15,790 --> 00:20:18,441 Get out of here. I can't beat up some little diaper boy 582 00:20:18,459 --> 00:20:20,885 because that would be embarrassing for me. 583 00:20:21,036 --> 00:20:22,053 And like I said, Moon Tobin, 584 00:20:22,204 --> 00:20:24,889 I've never ever been embarrassed. 585 00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:26,449 This is probably the most triumphant 586 00:20:26,542 --> 00:20:28,250 I'll ever feel while wearing a diaper 587 00:20:28,252 --> 00:20:29,802 in front of a bunch of people. 588 00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:31,044 At least, I hope so. 589 00:20:31,064 --> 00:20:33,213 All hail Moon Tobin. 590 00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:35,215 -The Diaper King. -Russell, no. 591 00:20:35,384 --> 00:20:38,811 So, Moon, how'd your school probject turn out? 592 00:20:38,963 --> 00:20:40,296 Well, you were right, Dad. 593 00:20:40,389 --> 00:20:42,147 The solution was right in front of me. 594 00:20:42,300 --> 00:20:44,057 It was a large diaper and a stuffed sloth. 595 00:20:44,226 --> 00:20:45,910 There you go. I'm proud of you, 596 00:20:46,061 --> 00:20:47,319 and Coco's happy for you, too. 597 00:20:47,413 --> 00:20:49,305 Hey, Dad, where are you gonna keep Coco? 598 00:20:49,323 --> 00:20:50,397 Oh, I meant to tell you. 599 00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:52,083 I'm gonna need you and Honeybee 600 00:20:52,234 --> 00:20:54,067 to move to a motel downtown. 601 00:20:54,161 --> 00:20:55,478 Coco needs his space. 602 00:20:55,496 --> 00:20:57,496 Fair enough, Dad. We'll go get our things. 603 00:20:57,648 --> 00:20:58,481 Wolf, no. 604 00:20:58,499 --> 00:21:00,073 ♪ It's the most important ♪ 605 00:21:00,167 --> 00:21:01,817 ♪ Job in the world ♪ 606 00:21:01,836 --> 00:21:05,170 ♪ Not a doctor, a pilot, a mommy or a daddy, no ♪ 607 00:21:05,323 --> 00:21:07,080 ♪ I'm talking about ♪ 608 00:21:07,100 --> 00:21:10,175 ♪ Being a flute caddie ♪ 609 00:21:10,328 --> 00:21:12,770 ♪ The pressure's on, your flautist ♪ 610 00:21:12,997 --> 00:21:15,106 ♪ Needs an alto, a standard C ♪ 611 00:21:15,275 --> 00:21:17,349 ♪ A piccolo, or a bass ♪ 612 00:21:17,443 --> 00:21:19,502 ♪ The first step's important, though ♪ 613 00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:22,763 ♪ Number one, open the case ♪ 614 00:21:22,782 --> 00:21:26,191 ♪ Slowly move it to the left, forward or right ♪ 615 00:21:26,286 --> 00:21:28,344 ♪ Your flautist will be waiting, lock eyes ♪ 616 00:21:28,362 --> 00:21:30,513 ♪ Don't lose sight. ♪ 617 00:21:30,531 --> 00:21:32,515 Captioning sponsored by BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT 618 00:21:32,533 --> 00:21:33,708 and TOYOTA.