1
00:00:01,485 --> 00:00:04,670
-♪ Look up there ♪
-♪ What do you see? ♪
2
00:00:04,897 --> 00:00:06,005
♪ Nature and stuff ♪
3
00:00:06,232 --> 00:00:07,581
-♪ Like a rock ♪
-♪ And a tree ♪
4
00:00:07,733 --> 00:00:10,175
♪ Oh, the Great North ♪
5
00:00:10,402 --> 00:00:13,828
♪ Way up here,
you can breathe the air ♪
6
00:00:13,997 --> 00:00:15,014
♪ Catch some fish ♪
7
00:00:15,165 --> 00:00:16,682
♪ Or gaze at a bear ♪
8
00:00:16,833 --> 00:00:17,832
♪ Wow ♪
9
00:00:18,001 --> 00:00:21,245
♪ Oh, the Great North ♪
10
00:00:21,338 --> 00:00:22,913
♪ Here we live, oh, oh ♪
11
00:00:23,006 --> 00:00:24,189
♪ Here we'll stay, oh, whoo ♪
12
00:00:24,416 --> 00:00:25,840
♪ From longest night
to longest day ♪
13
00:00:25,934 --> 00:00:29,737
♪ In the Great North. ♪
14
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(cheering)
15
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DEBBIE:
Then I did my sixth double axel,
16
00:00:36,262 --> 00:00:37,202
looked at the judges
17
00:00:37,204 --> 00:00:38,853
and said, "Judge this, dorks."
18
00:00:38,855 --> 00:00:40,021
Oh, that gives me an idea.
19
00:00:40,041 --> 00:00:42,266
We should put some skates
on the Dread Sled.
20
00:00:42,284 --> 00:00:43,450
Wait. What's the Dread Sled?
21
00:00:43,602 --> 00:00:45,786
I like sleds
and I love feeling dread.
22
00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:48,772
Well, uh, it's, uh, um...
23
00:00:48,791 --> 00:00:51,699
Moon, we've been building
a motorized sled together.
24
00:00:51,794 --> 00:00:52,885
Without me?
25
00:00:53,112 --> 00:00:55,445
How come you guys
never told me about this?
26
00:00:55,464 --> 00:00:56,463
Well, because...
27
00:00:56,557 --> 00:00:58,706
we do it when our moms do
Moms' Night.
28
00:00:58,801 --> 00:01:00,801
We're gonna ride the sled
across Fall-Thru Lake.
29
00:01:00,895 --> 00:01:02,469
You know that lake's cursed,
right?
30
00:01:02,621 --> 00:01:04,471
Yes. Someone tried to have
a quinceañera there,
31
00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:06,290
but it fell through
three different times
32
00:01:06,308 --> 00:01:08,125
due to scheduling issues,
and the next thing you know,
33
00:01:08,218 --> 00:01:10,385
she was turning 16
and it was too late.
34
00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:12,813
Taking this sled on a run is
gonna be the most fun I've had
35
00:01:12,965 --> 00:01:16,391
since my mom's boyfriend Jamie
took me on a wildflower hike.
36
00:01:16,485 --> 00:01:19,894
I almost passed out from how
beautiful the buttercups were.
37
00:01:19,914 --> 00:01:22,322
I'm in. For the sled,
not the buttercups.
38
00:01:22,474 --> 00:01:25,084
Well, Moon, like I said, we only
do sled stuff on Moms' Nights.
39
00:01:25,311 --> 00:01:28,420
We would have invited you,
but you don't have a mom.
40
00:01:28,572 --> 00:01:31,481
-What if I could find one?
-You can't just go
to the grocery store,
41
00:01:31,500 --> 00:01:33,817
put a hat on a pineapple,
and call it your mother.
42
00:01:33,836 --> 00:01:35,485
I know tons of moms.
43
00:01:35,504 --> 00:01:37,170
For instance, Beverly,
the elderly security guard
44
00:01:37,323 --> 00:01:38,338
at the Greyhound station.
45
00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:40,173
I'm sure she
could get the job done.
46
00:01:40,250 --> 00:01:41,675
I'll definitely bring a mom.
47
00:01:41,827 --> 00:01:43,160
I might even bring two.
48
00:01:43,253 --> 00:01:44,603
Now, this is salmon jerky.
49
00:01:44,754 --> 00:01:46,012
I feel very Jazzercised.
50
00:01:46,165 --> 00:01:48,014
I see where they get the energy
to swim upstream.
51
00:01:48,167 --> 00:01:50,142
Hey, is that our pot holder?
I swear I tucked it
52
00:01:50,294 --> 00:01:52,611
into its little drawer
in the guest cabin this morning.
53
00:01:52,838 --> 00:01:55,355
-I wonder how he got over here.
-Maybe he couldn't sleep,
54
00:01:55,524 --> 00:01:58,099
so he grew little legs
and walked over here.
55
00:01:58,193 --> 00:02:01,695
Or is there a possibility
that this pot holder's haunted?
56
00:02:01,847 --> 00:02:03,271
I doubt that, babe.
57
00:02:03,290 --> 00:02:05,773
Oh, I hope it is.
You know I love haunted stuff.
58
00:02:05,793 --> 00:02:07,126
Mansions, banshees,
59
00:02:07,353 --> 00:02:08,852
the look in Emma Thompson's eyes
60
00:02:08,945 --> 00:02:10,687
in the final scene
of Howards End.
61
00:02:10,780 --> 00:02:13,190
Let's take it home and put it
in its little beddy-bye.
62
00:02:13,283 --> 00:02:15,192
And I'll sing something
to get it back to Snoozeville.
63
00:02:15,285 --> 00:02:17,544
I just checked out a new ska
lullabies CD from the library.
64
00:02:17,696 --> 00:02:21,031
He'll be skanking to sleep
in no time.
65
00:02:21,124 --> 00:02:22,307
MOON:
Dad, I was wondering
66
00:02:22,459 --> 00:02:23,142
about something.
67
00:02:23,293 --> 00:02:24,459
You like moms, right?
68
00:02:24,478 --> 00:02:26,645
And might be interested
in meeting some?
69
00:02:26,796 --> 00:02:28,313
Ah, maybe.
But not many moms
70
00:02:28,465 --> 00:02:30,056
want to hang out
with a single dad.
71
00:02:30,151 --> 00:02:32,209
They assume
I'm some sort of barbarian
72
00:02:32,227 --> 00:02:34,969
who's gonna use their iron
to make a grilled cheese.
73
00:02:34,989 --> 00:02:36,971
But if there was a group of moms
who knew
74
00:02:36,991 --> 00:02:39,324
that you know how to use an iron
in a regular way,
75
00:02:39,476 --> 00:02:40,808
would you be interested
in joining them?
76
00:02:40,903 --> 00:02:42,810
Oof. Not really.
Groups aren't for me.
77
00:02:42,905 --> 00:02:44,812
Remember,
I briefly joined that book club,
78
00:02:44,907 --> 00:02:46,665
and it didn't go well.
79
00:02:46,892 --> 00:02:48,167
We were reading
Girl on the Train,
80
00:02:48,318 --> 00:02:51,244
and everyone said
I was too focused on the train.
81
00:02:51,397 --> 00:02:54,398
Okay, well, then,
on a completely unrelated topic,
82
00:02:54,416 --> 00:02:57,734
I have to do homework
at Henry's house tomorrow night.
83
00:02:57,827 --> 00:03:00,237
-Can you drop me off?
-You bet.
84
00:03:00,239 --> 00:03:01,588
Ah, night homework.
85
00:03:01,740 --> 00:03:04,457
I remember the thrill
of diagramming sentences
86
00:03:04,518 --> 00:03:05,684
in the evening.
87
00:03:05,911 --> 00:03:07,928
Hey, guys, you got to come
in the living room.
88
00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:09,596
Dad, I know you said
I'm an adult now,
89
00:03:09,748 --> 00:03:11,748
and you don't need to see
how high I can jump,
90
00:03:11,767 --> 00:03:13,174
but I'm jumping really high!
91
00:03:13,194 --> 00:03:15,752
-Yup. Here we come.
-Wait, the pot holder
92
00:03:15,771 --> 00:03:16,920
is in here again?
93
00:03:16,939 --> 00:03:18,680
What in the name
of taco seasoning?
94
00:03:18,757 --> 00:03:21,575
Probably just
a freaky coincidence, but...
95
00:03:22,945 --> 00:03:25,370
Rosemary's Gravy!
How'd you get here?
96
00:03:26,765 --> 00:03:28,457
(gasps)
Hamburger Help-me.
97
00:03:29,768 --> 00:03:31,543
Honey Bunches of Scrotes!
98
00:03:33,105 --> 00:03:34,604
Honeybee,
I don't want to scare you,
99
00:03:34,623 --> 00:03:36,698
but I've been finding
that spooky pot holder
100
00:03:36,792 --> 00:03:38,291
just all over the place.
101
00:03:38,368 --> 00:03:40,868
Really? (gasps)
Maybe you were right about it.
102
00:03:40,963 --> 00:03:42,870
I can't 100% say it's haunted,
103
00:03:42,965 --> 00:03:44,631
but there's
no other explanation.
104
00:03:44,725 --> 00:03:46,450
-This pot holder?
-(screams)
105
00:03:46,468 --> 00:03:48,618
I just found it sitting
out on the front porch
106
00:03:48,637 --> 00:03:51,045
-in the rocking chair.
-Jumpin' Jeremy Irons!
107
00:03:51,065 --> 00:03:53,548
It's been in the shower,
my bed, the mailbox,
108
00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:55,141
and now the rocking chair?
109
00:03:55,294 --> 00:03:57,677
My hunch was right--
we got a pot holder-geist!
110
00:03:57,829 --> 00:03:59,312
It was only a matter of time.
111
00:03:59,465 --> 00:04:01,798
Every oven mitt looks
like a ghost saying hello.
112
00:04:01,817 --> 00:04:03,133
You ever notice that?
113
00:04:03,302 --> 00:04:05,911
Your pot holder is haunted?
(gasps) Congratulations.
114
00:04:06,062 --> 00:04:07,637
-So you all love ghosts?
-Oh, yeah.
115
00:04:07,656 --> 00:04:09,414
When we were little,
we would always ask Dad
116
00:04:09,566 --> 00:04:11,083
to build our house
on an old burial ground,
117
00:04:11,234 --> 00:04:13,493
but he kept saying,
"The house is already built."
118
00:04:13,570 --> 00:04:14,753
Not cool, Beef.
119
00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:16,329
Have a good time, Moon.
120
00:04:16,423 --> 00:04:18,982
I have an exciting evening
of spice rack reorganization
121
00:04:19,075 --> 00:04:21,501
-ahead of me.
-Oh, actually, Dad,
122
00:04:21,595 --> 00:04:23,578
I think you'd better come talk
to Henry's mom.
123
00:04:23,597 --> 00:04:25,580
Henry said she's trying
to cut down a 50-foot oak
124
00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:28,008
in her backyard,
and she thinks the best type
125
00:04:28,084 --> 00:04:30,102
of chain saw to use is
an electric.
126
00:04:30,329 --> 00:04:31,678
What?! I'd better get in there
127
00:04:31,830 --> 00:04:34,014
and gently talk
about the pluses and minuses
128
00:04:34,166 --> 00:04:35,515
of that decision.
129
00:04:35,667 --> 00:04:36,942
Hi, Moon. Hi, Beef.
130
00:04:37,093 --> 00:04:38,277
Head on downstairs, hon.
131
00:04:38,428 --> 00:04:40,170
I just dropped off
a tray of snacks,
132
00:04:40,263 --> 00:04:42,447
and you don't want to get stuck
with the celery.
133
00:04:42,599 --> 00:04:43,840
Celery sucks.
134
00:04:43,933 --> 00:04:45,342
Okay, and, uh, Dad,
before I head downstairs,
135
00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:48,178
just want to let you know
I may have told my friends
136
00:04:48,196 --> 00:04:50,680
to tell their moms you'd like
to join their moms' group.
137
00:04:50,699 --> 00:04:52,124
So have a great time and enjoy
138
00:04:52,275 --> 00:04:54,351
and don't place me for adoption,
please. Farewell.
139
00:04:54,353 --> 00:04:56,778
-BEEF: Hmm...
-Well, looks like
your kid tricked you.
140
00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:58,038
Come on in and don't worry--
141
00:04:58,190 --> 00:05:00,857
we're tons of fun
on some ample buns.
142
00:05:00,876 --> 00:05:04,303
So you...
don't need chain saw advice?
143
00:05:04,454 --> 00:05:07,197
Oh, please. My dad was a
door-to-door chain saw salesman.
144
00:05:07,257 --> 00:05:09,141
And let me tell you,
dragging a whole tree
145
00:05:09,368 --> 00:05:10,867
to every house was not easy.
146
00:05:10,886 --> 00:05:12,369
Come along, Mr. Beef.
147
00:05:12,462 --> 00:05:13,979
-Hmm...
-Well, what are you waiting for?
148
00:05:14,130 --> 00:05:16,373
You want me to carry you?
'Cause I will.
149
00:05:16,391 --> 00:05:17,983
You're looking at the four-time
cow-carrying champion
150
00:05:18,210 --> 00:05:20,710
of Fairbanks State
Veterinary College, Beef.
151
00:05:20,729 --> 00:05:22,637
Uh-oh. Looks like
somebody dropped a sausage
152
00:05:22,731 --> 00:05:26,641
-on the taco plate.
-Yup. We've got a banana growing
on the papaya tree.
153
00:05:26,718 --> 00:05:28,476
Ha. Um, yeah.
154
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I am a man.
155
00:05:30,222 --> 00:05:31,646
I am a man person.
156
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:33,390
Guys, stop teasing him.
157
00:05:33,392 --> 00:05:35,483
Beef, we were very excited
when our kids told us
158
00:05:35,577 --> 00:05:37,410
you wanted to join
our little group.
159
00:05:37,504 --> 00:05:39,821
Pull up a cocktail
and let me pour you a chair.
160
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:41,915
-Welcome to Moms' Night.
-Oh, good.
161
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:45,902
I love groups
and am very comfortable in them.
162
00:05:45,995 --> 00:05:48,180
(clears throat)
Wonderful.
163
00:05:51,352 --> 00:05:53,093
Beef, what are you drinking?
I've got it all.
164
00:05:53,095 --> 00:05:55,579
Oh, and I've also got
some marijuana candy apples
165
00:05:55,581 --> 00:05:58,598
from my sister
in Sant-o Barbara, Californi-o.
166
00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:01,008
But proceed with caution.
I'm never having one again.
167
00:06:01,010 --> 00:06:02,435
I took one last Wednesday,
and my hands
168
00:06:02,588 --> 00:06:05,271
have just stopped feeling
like big spiders.
169
00:06:05,424 --> 00:06:07,107
I guess I could have an alcohol.
170
00:06:07,201 --> 00:06:09,559
-Now, where shall I sit? Here?
-What are... Why is he...
171
00:06:09,561 --> 00:06:12,445
-What is he doing?
-(chuckles) What are you
pointing at, big guy?
172
00:06:12,598 --> 00:06:14,431
I don't... I don't know.
I'm panicking.
173
00:06:14,449 --> 00:06:16,524
Marie? Make room for him
before he passes out.
174
00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:18,768
We won't bite.
We have a few drinks
175
00:06:18,862 --> 00:06:20,787
and we do a little embroidery.
176
00:06:20,939 --> 00:06:22,864
Sit down, sip your drink,
goss your sip.
177
00:06:22,958 --> 00:06:24,624
What do you know
that we don't know?
178
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:28,035
We can only talk about Nancy
Smith's bushes so many times.
179
00:06:28,113 --> 00:06:29,554
By the way,
I'm Russell's mom Marie,
180
00:06:29,706 --> 00:06:31,556
and I'm the only one
who actually embroiders.
181
00:06:31,708 --> 00:06:34,709
These two are usually too tipsy
to handle yarn.
182
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:36,878
That's not true. I crocheted
an 11-foot-long Smurf
183
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:38,788
in a complete blackout once.
184
00:06:38,807 --> 00:06:41,215
-What do you think?
-That's amazing. What is it?
185
00:06:41,309 --> 00:06:43,718
It's two dolphins exchanging
birthday gifts.
186
00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:45,737
-They're twins.
-Powerful stuff.
187
00:06:45,889 --> 00:06:47,480
Well, I'm Carissa, Debbie's mom.
188
00:06:47,633 --> 00:06:49,241
And, yes, I'm the one
who dated the janitor.
189
00:06:49,392 --> 00:06:51,392
And I'm the one who hit
the school crossing guard
190
00:06:51,412 --> 00:06:53,561
with my car.
But she's fine.
191
00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:55,730
Oh, I also hit her with
my fists. Now we're friends.
192
00:06:55,824 --> 00:06:57,916
So, out with the gossip,
meat man. What you got?
193
00:06:58,143 --> 00:07:00,310
Well, you said that
you have already discussed
194
00:07:00,328 --> 00:07:02,646
Nancy Smith's bushes at length,
195
00:07:02,739 --> 00:07:05,072
but let's be honest,
her hedges have not looked neat
196
00:07:05,150 --> 00:07:06,574
in a very long time.
197
00:07:06,668 --> 00:07:08,318
Oh, snap, Tobin!
198
00:07:08,336 --> 00:07:11,412
-This kitty has claws.
-Meow?
199
00:07:11,432 --> 00:07:12,580
Guys, come on.
200
00:07:12,674 --> 00:07:14,415
I told some really dirty lies
to get here.
201
00:07:14,584 --> 00:07:16,083
Let me see the sled.
202
00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:19,679
Actually, we were thinking we'd
do something different tonight,
203
00:07:19,831 --> 00:07:20,847
like, uh...
204
00:07:20,999 --> 00:07:22,832
-hit this pole with our hands.
-Wow!
205
00:07:22,926 --> 00:07:24,834
Listen to that. Makes you think.
206
00:07:24,928 --> 00:07:27,854
Music is everywhere, you know?
207
00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:29,839
Remove the tarp, please.
208
00:07:29,858 --> 00:07:31,341
Okay, Moon.
We'll show it to you,
209
00:07:31,359 --> 00:07:33,677
but you have to promise
not to be a, a downer.
210
00:07:33,770 --> 00:07:35,436
Since when am I a downer?
211
00:07:35,456 --> 00:07:37,197
Remember when we built
that hot air balloon
212
00:07:37,349 --> 00:07:39,516
for my Miss Piggy hand puppet
and you said it wouldn't work?
213
00:07:39,534 --> 00:07:41,034
And what happened?
It didn't work.
214
00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:43,203
Yeah, but it was fun
and it didn't work.
215
00:07:43,297 --> 00:07:45,355
Guys, relax. I love sleds.
216
00:07:45,448 --> 00:07:47,299
(sighs):
Fine. Let's show it to him.
217
00:07:47,468 --> 00:07:49,876
See, over there
we have the toilet seat
218
00:07:50,028 --> 00:07:51,786
that we're going to use
as a steering wheel.
219
00:07:51,863 --> 00:07:53,863
It's made for people
with hemorrhoids, so it's going
220
00:07:53,882 --> 00:07:56,641
-to feel really soft
on our hands.
-And there's the engine.
221
00:07:56,868 --> 00:07:57,976
A leaf blower?
222
00:07:58,127 --> 00:08:00,220
And the airbag is
that bag of cheddar popcorn.
223
00:08:00,314 --> 00:08:02,222
This sled is... great.
224
00:08:02,316 --> 00:08:04,541
It's obvious you're lying.
225
00:08:04,634 --> 00:08:05,984
Okay, fine! It's just...
226
00:08:06,211 --> 00:08:07,727
that steering wheel is clearly
not actually going to steer,
227
00:08:07,896 --> 00:08:10,137
the leaf blower will make
the sled go way too fast,
228
00:08:10,232 --> 00:08:12,732
and the bag of cheddar popcorn
is not going to save your life!
229
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:15,142
See? This is why we didn't want
to tell you about it.
230
00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:17,829
Sorry. I meant, I love it.
231
00:08:18,056 --> 00:08:21,391
Moon, we want you to be here,
but you cannot be a bummer.
232
00:08:21,393 --> 00:08:22,834
Okay. I can do it. I can be fun.
233
00:08:22,911 --> 00:08:26,153
Remember we went to Chuck E.
Cheese for my birthday party?
234
00:08:26,173 --> 00:08:28,565
For a tour of the kitchen
and management offices.
235
00:08:28,658 --> 00:08:30,917
We got to see
how the Cokes were made.
236
00:08:31,069 --> 00:08:33,086
Okay, fine, I see your point.
237
00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:35,071
MRS. TUNTLEY:
So, Carissa,
238
00:08:35,164 --> 00:08:38,332
how are things going with...
Chumbo?
239
00:08:38,426 --> 00:08:40,910
Well, at the movies, he said,
"My girlfriend would like
240
00:08:40,929 --> 00:08:42,854
some cheese sauce
for her pretzel."
241
00:08:43,081 --> 00:08:44,189
MRS. TUNTLEY AND MARIE:
Aw...
242
00:08:44,416 --> 00:08:46,416
So you two are both divorced?
243
00:08:46,434 --> 00:08:48,175
Yup. We're just a couple
of D-bags.
244
00:08:48,195 --> 00:08:51,588
I thought I was the only dad
here and the only divorcé.
245
00:08:51,606 --> 00:08:53,606
Well, you seem like
a great dad, Beef.
246
00:08:53,759 --> 00:08:55,775
No one blames you
for what happened with Kathleen.
247
00:08:55,944 --> 00:08:57,685
Yeah, it was tough
when she left.
248
00:08:57,854 --> 00:09:00,038
And it's been challenging being
a single parent ever since.
249
00:09:00,265 --> 00:09:02,207
I'm not really much
of a socializer.
250
00:09:02,358 --> 00:09:04,191
The only parent friends
I've ever had
251
00:09:04,211 --> 00:09:06,694
were some hummingbirds
that lived outside my window
252
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:08,547
with their hummingbird baby
for a while.
253
00:09:08,698 --> 00:09:10,865
Before I started hanging out
with these two,
254
00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:13,552
I spent a lot of time talking
to my bathtub reflection.
255
00:09:13,703 --> 00:09:15,945
She's fun, but she's crazy.
256
00:09:15,964 --> 00:09:17,705
As a single mom,
sometimes I feel like
257
00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,207
someone's always asking me
to take over flying the plane
258
00:09:20,302 --> 00:09:21,785
at 35,000 feet.
259
00:09:21,878 --> 00:09:24,621
And you have to get all the
passengers into their pajamas
260
00:09:24,714 --> 00:09:27,715
and convince them to eat
the in-flight meal.
261
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:30,493
-Exactly.
-I always feel better
when I talk to the girls
262
00:09:30,495 --> 00:09:32,312
after a couple of Dorothy's
famous rum and pokes.
263
00:09:32,388 --> 00:09:35,574
I hand you a glass of rum and
then I poke you in the shoulder
264
00:09:35,801 --> 00:09:37,058
and tell you to get talking.
265
00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:39,393
Well, maybe I'll come back
next week.
266
00:09:39,413 --> 00:09:41,228
Ah, look at us--
a classic foursome,
267
00:09:41,323 --> 00:09:43,748
-like Sex and the City.
-Or like those poor trash cans
268
00:09:43,900 --> 00:09:45,325
in front of the Burrito Barn.
269
00:09:45,419 --> 00:09:47,252
I'm the blue one.
She's super hot.
270
00:09:47,479 --> 00:09:49,070
JUDY:
Okay, everyone,
I have deeply investigated
271
00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:50,997
this haunted pot holder
situation,
272
00:09:51,149 --> 00:09:52,982
and I believe your pot holder
is being haunted
273
00:09:53,001 --> 00:09:54,818
by our ancestor Eugenia Tobin.
274
00:09:54,836 --> 00:09:57,153
She was a suffragette who hated
traditional "women's work"
275
00:09:57,172 --> 00:09:59,505
and was the first lady
to work at the docks.
276
00:09:59,658 --> 00:10:01,582
And then she died
when she fell into the oven
277
00:10:01,602 --> 00:10:04,585
while trying to burn
her burlap pioneer brassiere.
278
00:10:04,605 --> 00:10:07,421
(gasps)
And now she's
in this piece of fabric?
279
00:10:07,441 --> 00:10:08,589
What a world!
280
00:10:08,667 --> 00:10:10,016
(chuckles):
Well, she sounds very fun.
281
00:10:10,168 --> 00:10:12,185
I'd love to pick
her ghostly brain.
282
00:10:12,337 --> 00:10:15,004
Me, too.
And that's why I, AbracaJudy,
283
00:10:15,098 --> 00:10:17,098
have decided
we must have a séance.
284
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:19,342
Uh, are you sure
you're up for a séance, Wolf?
285
00:10:19,435 --> 00:10:22,103
What do you mean, Ham?
My husband loves haunted stuff.
286
00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:25,198
Yeah. L-Let's have
that séance today-ance.
287
00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:27,959
Wolf, no! We need special herbs
and a Ouija board
288
00:10:28,186 --> 00:10:30,036
and themed snacks,
like haunted hummus
289
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:31,445
and possessed pita chips.
290
00:10:31,465 --> 00:10:33,131
Oh, and I'll bring
otherworldly onion dip
291
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:34,466
and some cursed crackers.
292
00:10:34,693 --> 00:10:36,526
Maybe the ghost will eat
some snacks, too.
293
00:10:36,544 --> 00:10:38,970
I would love to watch a
pretzel rod fly through the air
294
00:10:39,122 --> 00:10:41,956
and then get chomped
by an unseen presence.
295
00:10:42,050 --> 00:10:43,475
BEEF:
I know this is very catty,
296
00:10:43,626 --> 00:10:46,202
but Stephanie at the post office
said she had no tape
297
00:10:46,221 --> 00:10:49,630
for me to use,
but behind her I could see tape.
298
00:10:49,724 --> 00:10:52,150
Oh, Chumbo's been going to
the post office in Death Cliff.
299
00:10:52,260 --> 00:10:54,560
That way he gets more time
with his fancy new snow machine.
300
00:10:54,729 --> 00:10:56,713
He tricked it all out.
It has a new sound system
301
00:10:56,882 --> 00:10:59,232
so we can go
on smooth jazz rides together.
302
00:10:59,384 --> 00:11:00,508
Oh, that's so romantic.
303
00:11:00,568 --> 00:11:01,642
You guys holding on
to each other,
304
00:11:01,811 --> 00:11:03,144
listening to Kenny G.
305
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:05,163
Jamie plays the flute
for Russell and I every morning.
306
00:11:05,314 --> 00:11:06,890
Here's the snow machine
and here's Chumbo.
307
00:11:06,983 --> 00:11:11,077
I know he's a bit of a wild man,
but my ex was a real drip.
308
00:11:11,229 --> 00:11:12,319
Chumbo makes me forget
309
00:11:12,488 --> 00:11:13,913
I'm a 47-year-old lady
with a mortgage,
310
00:11:13,990 --> 00:11:15,489
a weak pelvic floor,
and a slight--
311
00:11:15,583 --> 00:11:17,825
I mean teeny-tiny--
kleptomania problem.
312
00:11:17,903 --> 00:11:21,495
-He sounds great.
-To Chumbo and Carissa!
313
00:11:21,515 --> 00:11:22,906
(Beef sighs)
314
00:11:22,924 --> 00:11:24,665
Well, if it isn't
the famous Chumbo.
315
00:11:24,685 --> 00:11:27,686
And it looks like he's fetched
a soda for Carissa.
316
00:11:27,837 --> 00:11:29,521
He is complete BM:
317
00:11:29,672 --> 00:11:31,247
boyfriend material.
318
00:11:31,340 --> 00:11:32,673
Baby, you want a piece of ice?
319
00:11:32,767 --> 00:11:34,100
You know I do.
320
00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:35,935
Give me that ice.
Give me some ice, baby.
321
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:38,029
BEEF:
Uh-oh. That's not Carissa.
322
00:11:38,181 --> 00:11:41,324
He's the other type of BM:
bad man.
323
00:11:44,429 --> 00:11:46,279
So, you saw your new friend
Carissa's dude kissing
324
00:11:46,355 --> 00:11:49,432
-on another lady
in a parking lot.
-Yes, and indulging in--
325
00:11:49,434 --> 00:11:52,602
and pardon me for being
so graphic-- "ice-play."
326
00:11:52,695 --> 00:11:54,454
And you didn't call her
right away to tell her?
327
00:11:54,548 --> 00:11:56,548
No. Carissa really likes
this Chumbo,
328
00:11:56,699 --> 00:11:58,791
and I don't want her feelings
to get hurt.
329
00:11:58,885 --> 00:12:00,534
But imagine
how she's gonna feel
330
00:12:00,554 --> 00:12:02,295
if she finds out he's cheating
and that you knew.
331
00:12:02,447 --> 00:12:05,372
(groans) The thing is, back
before Kathleen and I split up,
332
00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:08,634
my friend Gordon told me
he walked in on her and Marcus
333
00:12:08,787 --> 00:12:10,895
making out in the bathroom
at the library.
334
00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:13,306
And for some reason,
I felt mad at Gordon
335
00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:15,216
and never talked to him again.
336
00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:17,569
What if I tell Carissa,
and she gets upset with me
337
00:12:17,796 --> 00:12:19,404
and kicks me out of Moms' Night?
338
00:12:19,573 --> 00:12:21,814
No more bonding?
No more dirty mom-tinis?
339
00:12:21,908 --> 00:12:23,967
No more insulting
Nancy Smith's bushes?
340
00:12:24,027 --> 00:12:26,077
-Her bushes are so disorganized!
-WOLF: You know,
341
00:12:26,229 --> 00:12:27,820
I once had to tell
my friend Cheesecake
342
00:12:27,914 --> 00:12:30,064
that his girlfriend took out
a life insurance policy on him.
343
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:31,899
And at first
he thought I was just jealous
344
00:12:31,918 --> 00:12:33,476
that they were spending
so much time together.
345
00:12:33,495 --> 00:12:35,903
And I was.
But then he found a machete
346
00:12:35,981 --> 00:12:37,663
under her bed
that had his name on it.
347
00:12:37,816 --> 00:12:39,758
Yeah, she'd stuck it on there
with a Post-it note.
348
00:12:39,985 --> 00:12:41,501
And once he saw that,
he understood.
349
00:12:41,653 --> 00:12:43,261
Part of the reason
we're still friends today
350
00:12:43,412 --> 00:12:44,763
is because he
didn't get murdered.
351
00:12:44,990 --> 00:12:48,249
So you guys think the best
thing to do is tell Carissa?
352
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:50,676
-I do, Dad.
-Beef, yes.
353
00:12:50,829 --> 00:12:52,328
I better give this a think.
354
00:12:52,347 --> 00:12:53,938
Perhaps I'll make another canoe.
355
00:12:54,165 --> 00:12:56,257
Dad, there are already seven
in the shed.
356
00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:58,092
And three in the basement.
357
00:12:58,111 --> 00:12:59,669
JUDY:
It's time to put on
358
00:12:59,687 --> 00:13:01,504
the ceremonial robes.
359
00:13:01,523 --> 00:13:02,672
Aka our old karate gis.
360
00:13:02,690 --> 00:13:05,116
JUDY: And now let
the rituals commence.
361
00:13:05,268 --> 00:13:07,844
To the spirit who sings
a ghostly note,
362
00:13:07,937 --> 00:13:10,196
come out, Eugenia,
and to us spoke.
363
00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:12,532
Great rhyme, Judy.
The only thing ghosts love more
364
00:13:12,684 --> 00:13:14,942
-than rituals are rhymes.
-Time for the next ritual.
365
00:13:15,036 --> 00:13:16,944
Ham, did you bring the blood
for us to drink?
366
00:13:17,038 --> 00:13:18,946
I didn't want to sacrifice
any animals,
367
00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:21,115
but I did find
this Chobani strawberry yogurt.
368
00:13:21,209 --> 00:13:22,449
It's kind of red.
369
00:13:22,544 --> 00:13:23,951
And it has cow in it.
370
00:13:24,045 --> 00:13:26,546
-Spooky.
-Let's pass it around.
371
00:13:26,698 --> 00:13:30,124
Okay, well, I think tonight
I'll just head home, so...
372
00:13:30,218 --> 00:13:31,643
Get in here, Beef-butt!
373
00:13:31,794 --> 00:13:33,144
Oh, no, she saw me.
374
00:13:33,296 --> 00:13:34,554
Marie made her Marie-garitas!
375
00:13:34,648 --> 00:13:36,539
They have 16 kinds of alcohol
in 'em!
376
00:13:36,632 --> 00:13:41,210
(takes deep breath)
And I am going to need
all 16 kinds.
377
00:13:41,229 --> 00:13:44,638
(robotically):
How is everyone
this fine evening?
378
00:13:44,732 --> 00:13:47,733
(laughs):
Beef, why are you talking
like a robot?
379
00:13:47,886 --> 00:13:49,552
BEEF (quietly):
Oh, no.
380
00:13:49,571 --> 00:13:50,662
Ice.
381
00:13:51,832 --> 00:13:53,739
-Oh, God.
-What is it, Beef?
Do you have diarrhea?
382
00:13:53,834 --> 00:13:57,151
Jamie always says "Oh, God"
when he has diarrhea.
383
00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,395
No, it's... Carissa,
384
00:13:59,488 --> 00:14:01,172
there's something
I have to tell you. I...
385
00:14:01,399 --> 00:14:03,749
I saw Chumbo in
the Maude's All Day parking lot
386
00:14:03,844 --> 00:14:06,069
sharing ice with another woman.
387
00:14:06,162 --> 00:14:08,847
And then he shared...
kissing with that woman.
388
00:14:08,998 --> 00:14:10,998
-(gasps)
-What?! Chum, no.
389
00:14:11,167 --> 00:14:13,076
-I'm so sorry.
-(sobbing)
390
00:14:13,094 --> 00:14:16,079
This is gonna be the best night
of our lives!
391
00:14:16,172 --> 00:14:19,265
You know what? It was fun to let
go and enjoy making this sled.
392
00:14:19,417 --> 00:14:20,583
Of course it was fun,
393
00:14:20,676 --> 00:14:22,026
even though I had to hang out
with you guys.
394
00:14:22,178 --> 00:14:23,769
If we break the sound barrier
on this sled
395
00:14:23,864 --> 00:14:25,104
and you guys
can't hear me talking,
396
00:14:25,256 --> 00:14:26,698
just know that
I'm calling you all losers.
397
00:14:26,849 --> 00:14:29,683
(scoffs): I'm not sure
we'll achieve that exact speed.
398
00:14:29,777 --> 00:14:31,035
-Moon...
-Sorry, I forgot.
399
00:14:31,187 --> 00:14:32,778
Yes, we'll probably break
the sound barrier
400
00:14:32,931 --> 00:14:35,707
-and Debbie will call us losers.
-That's more like it.
401
00:14:35,858 --> 00:14:38,192
We're gonna go so fast,
it'll tear all of my hair off.
402
00:14:38,286 --> 00:14:40,269
I've always wanted to be bald.
403
00:14:40,288 --> 00:14:41,938
-Like Jamie.
-All right,
404
00:14:42,031 --> 00:14:44,273
-we'll launch from here.
-MOON: Oh...
405
00:14:44,367 --> 00:14:45,458
no.
406
00:14:45,610 --> 00:14:46,442
Come on, Moon, get on.
407
00:14:46,461 --> 00:14:47,552
Guys, wait.
408
00:14:47,779 --> 00:14:49,612
I'm trying really hard
not to be a buzzkill,
409
00:14:49,705 --> 00:14:52,281
but I'm afraid that this sled
might be an us-kill.
410
00:14:52,300 --> 00:14:53,966
As in it might actually kill us.
411
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:55,668
It's just sledding down
a big old hill
412
00:14:55,803 --> 00:14:58,621
-towards a frozen lake, Moon.
-Dread Sled or die trying.
413
00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:00,473
Russell! Prepare to launch.
414
00:15:00,625 --> 00:15:02,308
All right, buddy,
it's your time to shine.
415
00:15:02,460 --> 00:15:03,993
This is why I brought you.
416
00:15:03,995 --> 00:15:05,886
Okay, then at least
let me give each of you
417
00:15:05,906 --> 00:15:07,888
a very big hug goodbye.
418
00:15:07,908 --> 00:15:10,742
-Ugh.
-And a hug to you, Debbie.
419
00:15:10,893 --> 00:15:13,077
-(groaning)
-And, Henry, also a hug.
420
00:15:13,229 --> 00:15:15,655
And, Russell, one more hug.
421
00:15:15,749 --> 00:15:18,249
And just, you know, I love you.
422
00:15:18,401 --> 00:15:20,734
Aw. I love you, too, pal.
423
00:15:20,828 --> 00:15:22,995
-Moon!
-I'm just gonna stay here
and practice fishing.
424
00:15:23,164 --> 00:15:25,739
This attitude is exactly
why we didn't want to tell you
425
00:15:25,759 --> 00:15:27,074
about the sled.
426
00:15:27,168 --> 00:15:28,501
I know. I'm a downer.
427
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:31,245
And it's best that you
leave me behind and go enjoy
428
00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:35,082
whatever our chaotic universe
brings to you this evening.
429
00:15:35,176 --> 00:15:37,160
Turn the blower on!
430
00:15:37,253 --> 00:15:39,662
-(whooping)
-(laughing)
431
00:15:39,755 --> 00:15:41,998
-DEBBIE: What moron put
that giant tree there?
-Oh, no!
432
00:15:42,016 --> 00:15:43,316
(screaming)
433
00:15:45,779 --> 00:15:48,947
Oh, my God, we could have,
like, really died.
434
00:15:49,098 --> 00:15:50,690
Like, a lot.
435
00:15:50,784 --> 00:15:53,934
-Moon, you saved us.
-Thank you.
436
00:15:54,028 --> 00:15:56,529
Just practicing my fishing,
like I said.
437
00:15:56,681 --> 00:15:58,864
You do kind of burst our bubble
sometimes,
438
00:15:59,017 --> 00:16:00,850
but it's smart of us
to keep you around.
439
00:16:00,868 --> 00:16:04,520
-Thanks for being boring.
-Yeah. Sorry we left you out.
440
00:16:04,539 --> 00:16:07,373
-It won't happen again.
-If you're so smart at sleds
like an idiot,
441
00:16:07,525 --> 00:16:09,116
you should take a look
at our bat-a-pult.
442
00:16:09,210 --> 00:16:11,360
It's supposed to launch live
bats at our enemies' houses,
443
00:16:11,379 --> 00:16:12,953
but the bats keep biting us.
444
00:16:12,973 --> 00:16:15,548
(scoffs)
Well, I can tell you up front
that the problem is,
445
00:16:15,717 --> 00:16:18,309
you should not be near any bats
at any time.
446
00:16:18,386 --> 00:16:20,812
-But have you considered rats?
-That's a thought.
447
00:16:20,963 --> 00:16:24,631
And you all really, really,
really need to get rabies shots,
448
00:16:24,800 --> 00:16:26,876
like right away, like tonight.
449
00:16:26,894 --> 00:16:28,987
BEEF:
And if you don't want to be
my friend anymore
450
00:16:29,138 --> 00:16:31,972
-because I told you,
I understand.
-(sobbing)
451
00:16:32,066 --> 00:16:34,492
I very much enjoyed my time
as one of the moms,
452
00:16:34,643 --> 00:16:38,830
but I can leave now, and you can
again be a classic threesome,
453
00:16:38,981 --> 00:16:40,740
like the Rice Krispies children.
454
00:16:40,816 --> 00:16:42,041
Beef, no. You should stay.
455
00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:44,168
We can't just let Chumbo
get away with this.
456
00:16:44,395 --> 00:16:46,062
-Should we kill him?
-Yes.
457
00:16:46,231 --> 00:16:47,913
Ah, I don't think
we should kill him.
458
00:16:48,082 --> 00:16:50,916
But I may have a different,
also good idea.
459
00:16:51,069 --> 00:16:52,844
Perhaps we show old Chumbo
460
00:16:53,071 --> 00:16:56,639
that sometimes ice is a dish
best served cold.
461
00:16:59,260 --> 00:17:02,078
If it's ice Chumbo loves
so much, let's give him
462
00:17:02,096 --> 00:17:04,338
the biggest piece of ice
he's ever seen.
463
00:17:04,432 --> 00:17:07,007
Oh, I can't believe
we're mischief-ing someone.
464
00:17:07,101 --> 00:17:08,675
I've never mischief'd anyone
before.
465
00:17:08,695 --> 00:17:10,862
Oh, unless you count the time
I accidentally handed Jamie
466
00:17:11,013 --> 00:17:12,864
the sugar instead of the salt
at the table,
467
00:17:12,940 --> 00:17:14,515
and he ate sweet cod for dinner.
468
00:17:14,609 --> 00:17:16,701
He loved it,
and now I make it once a week.
469
00:17:16,852 --> 00:17:19,186
-There it is.
-Ugh! Looks like that thing
did a bunch of cocaine,
470
00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:22,448
then got into an accident
with a disco ball on the sun.
471
00:17:22,600 --> 00:17:24,709
And not the good cocaine.
That college cocaine.
472
00:17:24,860 --> 00:17:26,711
He gave me this extra key
to his snow machine,
473
00:17:26,938 --> 00:17:28,046
because in the event
of his death,
474
00:17:28,273 --> 00:17:29,863
he wanted me
to strap his corpse to it
475
00:17:29,883 --> 00:17:31,532
and light it on fire
with a flaming arrow
476
00:17:31,551 --> 00:17:33,885
so he could ride it
into the gates of Valhalla.
477
00:17:34,112 --> 00:17:35,720
Don't you mean
through the gates?
478
00:17:35,963 --> 00:17:37,204
No. He said "into the gates."
479
00:17:37,223 --> 00:17:39,057
Let's get it into the dumpster
over there.
480
00:17:39,284 --> 00:17:42,060
All right, I believe a hose
is located just there.
481
00:17:42,211 --> 00:17:43,394
-Got it.
-Great.
482
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,379
Throw it over the side.
I'm gonna duct-tape
483
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,714
all the cracks in the dumpster
to make it watertight.
484
00:17:47,734 --> 00:17:49,809
Good thing I refreshed
the roll of duct tape
485
00:17:49,961 --> 00:17:51,794
in my duct tape pocket
this morning.
486
00:17:51,813 --> 00:17:53,554
Turn on the hose.
487
00:17:53,648 --> 00:17:55,889
At the current temperatures,
the snow machine will be frozen
488
00:17:55,967 --> 00:17:57,650
into a big block of ice
489
00:17:57,802 --> 00:18:01,137
by the time Chumbo's finished
his Monster Energy Mojitos.
490
00:18:01,230 --> 00:18:02,580
It's the perfect revenge.
491
00:18:02,807 --> 00:18:04,490
Yeah. But I'm also gonna burn
his smooth jazz collection,
492
00:18:04,567 --> 00:18:06,325
throw out all
of his takeout leftovers,
493
00:18:06,419 --> 00:18:08,753
and then just absolutely destroy
his dojo.
494
00:18:08,980 --> 00:18:10,313
Oh, I feel so alive!
495
00:18:10,331 --> 00:18:12,481
Should we all go to Dairy Queen
and get Blizzards?
496
00:18:12,575 --> 00:18:15,075
-It's open until 9:30.
-I don't see why not.
497
00:18:15,095 --> 00:18:17,486
(laughs):
We really are
a classic foursome,
498
00:18:17,505 --> 00:18:20,414
just like the Little Women,
except we're big women
499
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:21,933
and I'm a man.
500
00:18:22,160 --> 00:18:24,994
All right, now that we finished
that possibly very, very expired
501
00:18:25,129 --> 00:18:27,179
Chobani yogurt/blood offering,
502
00:18:27,332 --> 00:18:28,998
it's time to say the chant.
503
00:18:29,016 --> 00:18:31,000
ALL:
Double, double,
pot holder trouble.
504
00:18:31,018 --> 00:18:34,019
Spirits speak
into earthly bubble.
505
00:18:34,114 --> 00:18:35,929
-Aah!
-Holy hairspray!
506
00:18:35,949 --> 00:18:38,507
The yogurt jumped
off the table by itself!
507
00:18:38,601 --> 00:18:40,025
Oh, my God,
there's definitely a ghost here.
508
00:18:40,194 --> 00:18:42,286
We must've messed up
the ritual and upset Eugenia,
509
00:18:42,438 --> 00:18:43,846
and now she's attacking us!
510
00:18:43,865 --> 00:18:45,348
She's going to kill us!
511
00:18:45,366 --> 00:18:48,017
-(sobbing): Oh, no, no, no...
-Wolf, babe, calm down.
512
00:18:48,035 --> 00:18:51,203
-Eugenia is not going
to kill us.
-You can't stop her, Honeybee.
513
00:18:51,356 --> 00:18:53,447
She's more powerful
than you could ever imagine.
514
00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:55,449
-(Wolf gasping)
-Uh-oh, the ghost panic is back.
515
00:18:55,468 --> 00:18:57,042
Okay, let's get a chair
behind him.
516
00:18:57,137 --> 00:18:59,137
-Sit down.
-Drink.
-I don't think I can!
517
00:18:59,364 --> 00:19:02,198
-I think I'm hyperventilating.
-Guys, what is going on?
518
00:19:02,216 --> 00:19:04,717
Wolf's having a little
panic attack about ghosts.
519
00:19:04,869 --> 00:19:07,203
This used to happen all the time
when we were kids.
520
00:19:07,221 --> 00:19:08,795
One time he saw a napkin blowing
in the breeze
521
00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:11,223
-and he threw up.
-But Wolf loves movies
about ghosts.
522
00:19:11,376 --> 00:19:12,633
Movies are different,
523
00:19:12,652 --> 00:19:14,652
because he knows
there's craft services there.
524
00:19:14,803 --> 00:19:16,379
To calm himself down,
he pictures a phantom
525
00:19:16,397 --> 00:19:19,231
-eating a turkey cheese roll-up.
-We thought he grew out of this!
526
00:19:19,384 --> 00:19:20,140
Me, too.
527
00:19:20,234 --> 00:19:23,219
But it is happening!
528
00:19:23,312 --> 00:19:24,904
Oh, no! I didn't know.
This is my fault.
529
00:19:24,998 --> 00:19:27,223
The pot holder
wasn't actually haunted.
530
00:19:27,316 --> 00:19:29,225
Eugenia wasn't moving it around.
It was me!
531
00:19:29,243 --> 00:19:31,727
-(gasping)
-What?
-I was the one moving it around.
532
00:19:31,746 --> 00:19:33,229
So you'd think it was haunted.
The first time
533
00:19:33,247 --> 00:19:35,231
I genuinely had no idea
why the pot holder had moved.
534
00:19:35,324 --> 00:19:36,749
But once I saw
how excited you were,
535
00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:39,326
I wanted to let you believe.
I hadn't seen you that excited
536
00:19:39,345 --> 00:19:41,737
since we saw
Scream 8: Still Screaming.
537
00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:42,755
(labored breathing):
Great movie.
538
00:19:42,924 --> 00:19:44,665
Neve Campbell is ba...
539
00:19:44,759 --> 00:19:45,999
Oh, no! He fainted!
540
00:19:46,093 --> 00:19:48,168
-Nope. I'm here, baby.
-Oh, thank God.
541
00:19:48,188 --> 00:19:49,336
Babe, I thought I lost you.
542
00:19:49,505 --> 00:19:50,930
You didn't lose me.
I mean, sure,
543
00:19:51,082 --> 00:19:53,082
my heart rate is probably
in the 300s right now,
544
00:19:53,175 --> 00:19:55,601
but you creating
this scary experience for me
545
00:19:55,695 --> 00:19:57,102
was still very thoughtful.
546
00:19:57,255 --> 00:19:58,604
You're the perfect wife.
547
00:19:58,681 --> 00:20:00,698
And you'll make
a wonderful ghost someday.
548
00:20:00,925 --> 00:20:03,926
MARIE:
That was probably the most fun
I've ever had.
549
00:20:03,945 --> 00:20:05,185
-(chuckles): Me, too.
-Me, too.
550
00:20:05,205 --> 00:20:07,354
Ooh, I just wish
we could have seen his face
551
00:20:07,373 --> 00:20:08,873
when he found that ice-mobile.
552
00:20:09,042 --> 00:20:11,450
(laughs)
I'm guessing it was
a pretty angry face
553
00:20:11,577 --> 00:20:13,711
based on all
of the text messages he sent me.
554
00:20:13,938 --> 00:20:15,379
Suck on that, Chum-blow.
555
00:20:15,531 --> 00:20:18,216
Look. He sent a picture of it
in the ice,
556
00:20:18,367 --> 00:20:20,384
and a bunch
of middle finger emojis.
557
00:20:20,611 --> 00:20:24,129
And also the pray hands?
But I think that was a mistake.
558
00:20:24,206 --> 00:20:25,223
Nice, nice, baby!
559
00:20:25,374 --> 00:20:27,725
(laughs)
Crunch on that ice, bud!
560
00:20:27,876 --> 00:20:29,209
Well, that was fun.
561
00:20:29,229 --> 00:20:31,395
(sighs)
But I guess
I am on my own again now.
562
00:20:31,547 --> 00:20:33,622
You're not on your own.
You have us.
563
00:20:33,641 --> 00:20:36,976
And Chumbo is a fool
for taking you for granted.
564
00:20:37,128 --> 00:20:38,569
Thanks, Beef.
And just so you know,
565
00:20:38,796 --> 00:20:41,981
-Kathleen was a fool, too.
-Oh. I wish I had had you guys
566
00:20:42,133 --> 00:20:43,724
to talk to back then.
567
00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:45,651
Huh. I was
a little bit of a mess.
568
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,152
(chuckles)
Hey, speaking of messes,
569
00:20:47,305 --> 00:20:49,580
have you guys seen
Nancy Smith's new flower beds?
570
00:20:49,732 --> 00:20:50,748
Chrysanthemums?
571
00:20:50,899 --> 00:20:53,400
More like
I'd-like-to-barf-on-'ems.
572
00:20:53,494 --> 00:20:54,585
Damn, Tobin.
573
00:20:54,737 --> 00:20:56,328
(all laughing)
574
00:20:56,422 --> 00:20:59,832
♪ Hush, pot holder,
close your eyes ♪
575
00:20:59,926 --> 00:21:02,242
♪ Daddy's gonna skank you
to sleep ♪
576
00:21:02,262 --> 00:21:05,912
♪ Relax in your drawer,
feel the bass ♪
577
00:21:05,932 --> 00:21:08,157
♪ Don't you make a peep ♪
578
00:21:08,175 --> 00:21:12,177
♪ I'll tuck you in
under a warm dishcloth ♪
579
00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:15,664
♪ You make me so proud,
I could weep ♪
580
00:21:15,683 --> 00:21:19,018
♪ Your mama and papa
watch over you ♪
581
00:21:19,170 --> 00:21:21,353
♪ You insulate our hands ♪
582
00:21:21,506 --> 00:21:23,355
-♪ From the heat ♪
-♪ Too hot! ♪
583
00:21:23,449 --> 00:21:26,450
♪ Hush, pot holder,
close your eyes ♪
584
00:21:26,602 --> 00:21:28,452
♪ Daddy's gonna skank you
to sleep. ♪
585
00:21:28,604 --> 00:21:30,437
Captioning sponsored by
BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT
586
00:21:30,531 --> 00:21:32,164
and TOYOTA.