1
00:00:01,393 --> 00:00:04,745
-♪ Look up there ♪
-♪ What do you see? ♪
2
00:00:04,897 --> 00:00:06,154
♪ Nature and stuff ♪
3
00:00:06,173 --> 00:00:07,655
-♪ Like a rock ♪
-♪ And a tree ♪
4
00:00:07,675 --> 00:00:10,400
♪ Oh, the Great North ♪
5
00:00:10,419 --> 00:00:13,920
♪ Way up here,
you can breathe the air ♪
6
00:00:14,015 --> 00:00:15,088
♪ Catch some fish ♪
7
00:00:15,182 --> 00:00:16,757
♪ Or gaze at a bear ♪
8
00:00:16,909 --> 00:00:17,924
♪ Wow ♪
9
00:00:18,019 --> 00:00:21,578
♪ Oh, the Great North ♪
10
00:00:21,597 --> 00:00:22,929
♪ Here we live, oh, oh ♪
11
00:00:23,024 --> 00:00:24,339
♪ Here we'll stay, oh, whoo ♪
12
00:00:24,433 --> 00:00:25,932
♪ From longest night
to longest day ♪
13
00:00:26,085 --> 00:00:30,029
♪ In the Great North. ♪
14
00:00:31,757 --> 00:00:33,532
(cheering)
15
00:00:36,111 --> 00:00:37,870
JUDY (echoes):
Where's Dad?
16
00:00:38,021 --> 00:00:39,187
WOLF (echoes):
He's not in his room.
17
00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:40,781
MOON (echoes):
It is upon us.
18
00:00:40,875 --> 00:00:43,375
The Beef Hunt!
19
00:00:45,529 --> 00:00:47,379
WOLF:
Clooney, what are you up to?
20
00:00:47,531 --> 00:00:50,107
Eating a cacio e pepe.
Friggin' classy.
21
00:00:50,125 --> 00:00:51,675
What the drip?
22
00:00:52,611 --> 00:00:53,627
(squeaking)
23
00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:55,036
Aah! Leakin' Lucy Lawless!
24
00:00:55,056 --> 00:00:57,447
Aah! What's going on?
Why are you naked?
25
00:00:57,541 --> 00:00:58,390
Why is there water?
26
00:00:58,542 --> 00:00:59,892
-Got to grab my tools!
-Wolf, no!
27
00:01:00,119 --> 00:01:01,209
Let's call a plumber.
28
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:02,803
The Bobcat's got this one
under control.
29
00:01:02,897 --> 00:01:04,396
I'm trying Bobcat out
as a nickname.
30
00:01:04,548 --> 00:01:05,731
Is it too many animals?
31
00:01:05,882 --> 00:01:07,215
This feels like a situation
for a real plumber,
32
00:01:07,309 --> 00:01:08,959
with a regular name,
like Champ. No.
33
00:01:08,977 --> 00:01:09,902
Gerb. Wait.
34
00:01:10,053 --> 00:01:11,403
Why can't I think
of a regular name?
35
00:01:11,630 --> 00:01:13,555
Don't worry, babe,
you don't need Gerb
36
00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:14,798
when you got the B-Cat.
37
00:01:14,817 --> 00:01:16,316
-Aah!
-Oh, no, no! Toilet juice!
38
00:01:16,468 --> 00:01:18,819
Thanks again for letting us
crash in your room, Ham.
39
00:01:18,971 --> 00:01:20,804
Our toilet's being
a real nasty freak.
40
00:01:20,823 --> 00:01:23,415
-She really is.
-Well, we're all so excited
for you and Honeybee
41
00:01:23,642 --> 00:01:25,918
to be sleeping over in the main
house during Thanksgiving week.
42
00:01:26,145 --> 00:01:28,253
I'll be perfectly happy
on Moon's floor.
43
00:01:28,405 --> 00:01:30,071
Did somebody say Boyz Night?
44
00:01:30,132 --> 00:01:32,983
I said it with a "Z," so I think
it's gonna be pretty fun.
45
00:01:33,001 --> 00:01:34,818
Oh, Ham,
you've got a lot of books.
46
00:01:34,911 --> 00:01:36,002
I can get some reading done.
47
00:01:36,155 --> 00:01:37,912
Chunky Chili
for the Teenage Soul,
48
00:01:37,932 --> 00:01:39,747
some Mary Higgins Clark...
49
00:01:39,767 --> 00:01:40,915
The Hacking Halvorsons?
50
00:01:40,935 --> 00:01:42,083
Oh, yeah, we all read those.
51
00:01:42,103 --> 00:01:43,435
They're
about this Viking family.
52
00:01:43,662 --> 00:01:45,329
Very violent
but also very close.
53
00:01:45,347 --> 00:01:48,440
And they love cutting
the heads off of things.
54
00:01:48,592 --> 00:01:50,109
Like, any head,
they'll just cut it off.
55
00:01:50,260 --> 00:01:52,002
Even if they're busy.
They don't mind.
56
00:01:52,095 --> 00:01:53,112
JUDY:
Well, you guys picked
57
00:01:53,263 --> 00:01:54,929
a great time
to destroy your toilet
58
00:01:54,949 --> 00:01:57,357
with the power of poop, because
I have a new shadow puppet
59
00:01:57,509 --> 00:01:58,817
I'm debuting after dinner.
60
00:01:58,969 --> 00:02:01,194
I have to dislocate my thumb
to do it, but it's worth it.
61
00:02:01,347 --> 00:02:02,512
I like a shadow puppet.
62
00:02:02,606 --> 00:02:04,439
Sometimes a regular puppet
is just too much.
63
00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:07,200
Well, the plumber's out of town
for the Thanksgiving holiday,
64
00:02:07,353 --> 00:02:09,202
but he'll fix the toilet
first thing Monday morning.
65
00:02:09,296 --> 00:02:11,705
In the meantime, having
all you here under one roof
66
00:02:11,799 --> 00:02:13,948
will be fun, like when you guys
were little kids.
67
00:02:14,042 --> 00:02:16,635
Except one of my sons
is married.
68
00:02:16,786 --> 00:02:18,303
Moon is married?
69
00:02:18,455 --> 00:02:19,954
Oh, Wolf. Right.
70
00:02:19,974 --> 00:02:21,140
WOLF:
Okay, so, I took the liberty
71
00:02:21,367 --> 00:02:22,866
of whipping up
a new chore chart and...
72
00:02:22,959 --> 00:02:24,792
Uh, Wolf,
Ham is the chore chief now,
73
00:02:24,812 --> 00:02:26,219
so he assigns the workload.
74
00:02:26,313 --> 00:02:29,148
You had a great run, Wolf,
but it's Ham's time now.
75
00:02:29,299 --> 00:02:32,058
Fine. I'll stand down
and await the chief's orders.
76
00:02:32,153 --> 00:02:34,378
-Um, Wolf?
-(chuckles): Am I sweeping?
77
00:02:34,396 --> 00:02:37,138
Oh, wow. Well, then let me
just set the broom down here
78
00:02:37,232 --> 00:02:39,065
against the, uh,
the wall over here...
79
00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:40,901
HAM:
You're still sweeping.
80
00:02:41,053 --> 00:02:42,810
I'm excited
we're gonna be roommates again
81
00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:44,054
for a whole week.
82
00:02:44,147 --> 00:02:45,889
We can play all the games
we used to play,
83
00:02:45,908 --> 00:02:49,059
-like Overworked Cashier
and Surly Customer, and...
-HAM: Sorry, Moon.
84
00:02:49,077 --> 00:02:50,727
That sounds fun,
but I really need to focus
85
00:02:50,746 --> 00:02:52,746
on finding something
in this Michigan cookbook
86
00:02:52,898 --> 00:02:55,007
to make for Crispin
and his parents at Thanksgiving.
87
00:02:55,234 --> 00:02:56,842
Wouldn't the kitchen be
a better place for this?
88
00:02:57,069 --> 00:02:58,752
Yeah, I tried, but Wolf
kept cleaning up my ingredients
89
00:02:58,846 --> 00:03:01,162
-before I could use them.
-Why don't you take a break
90
00:03:01,182 --> 00:03:02,997
and we can play
Monster Brothers?
91
00:03:03,091 --> 00:03:05,166
Remember, we'd get
into Mom's old fur coats
92
00:03:05,260 --> 00:03:06,834
and run around the house
scaring everybody?
93
00:03:06,929 --> 00:03:08,470
I can't.
I got to figure this out.
94
00:03:08,580 --> 00:03:10,931
Damn it! I don't know
what "Detroit-style" means.
95
00:03:11,083 --> 00:03:13,192
Do I put a little car on it?
96
00:03:14,086 --> 00:03:16,586
Hey! Who's in the mood
for some Jude?
97
00:03:16,721 --> 00:03:17,863
I know I am.
98
00:03:18,090 --> 00:03:19,439
Oh, hey, Alanis.
I can't talk right now.
99
00:03:19,533 --> 00:03:22,183
I have to memorize this poem
from the 14th century by Monday.
100
00:03:22,203 --> 00:03:24,686
"Ye Ballad
of the Sportsman's Horseman."
101
00:03:24,780 --> 00:03:26,038
My English grade is teetering
102
00:03:26,189 --> 00:03:27,614
between an A-minus
and a B-plus right now,
103
00:03:27,766 --> 00:03:29,023
and I can't get a "B."
104
00:03:29,117 --> 00:03:31,359
I would "B" so ashamed
of myself.
105
00:03:31,453 --> 00:03:33,620
-Hmm. But you're fine
with that joke?
-Shh.
106
00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:35,714
No more talking.
I have to memorize this.
107
00:03:35,865 --> 00:03:37,441
Okay.
I can just stand here quietly.
108
00:03:37,534 --> 00:03:39,276
Great. Because I have a system
where I picture
109
00:03:39,294 --> 00:03:40,944
each of the words with boobs
and a big round butt
110
00:03:40,963 --> 00:03:42,462
so I pay attention.
111
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:44,223
Yeah, nothing keeps your focus
like boobs and butts.
112
00:03:44,374 --> 00:03:46,466
Oh, I know. (clears throat)
"The horseman's corset..."
113
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:48,543
You know, I used to have
to memorize a lot of lines
114
00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:50,454
for You Can't Do That
on Television.
115
00:03:50,472 --> 00:03:51,638
I thought you said
you were gonna be quiet.
116
00:03:51,790 --> 00:03:53,139
Oh, yes, I am. Starting now.
117
00:03:53,292 --> 00:03:55,567
"The horseman's corset forces
the lord's reinforcements.
118
00:03:55,719 --> 00:03:56,902
"All hurried they run,
119
00:03:57,053 --> 00:03:58,295
"scurrying, worrying, furry,
and slurrying.
120
00:03:58,313 --> 00:04:00,072
"The birds' beaks
peak and screech,
121
00:04:00,299 --> 00:04:02,074
"beseeching and bequeathing
a maiden's teat.
122
00:04:02,225 --> 00:04:03,967
"The sport is upon us
at the court.
123
00:04:04,060 --> 00:04:05,077
The gentleman pats his seat."
124
00:04:05,228 --> 00:04:07,079
(exhales)
Okay, I think I've got it.
125
00:04:07,230 --> 00:04:09,748
-"Horseman's corset forces..."
-Horsey borshy porshy deroshy...
126
00:04:09,941 --> 00:04:11,491
-Alanis!
-What? I'm helping!
127
00:04:11,643 --> 00:04:13,752
-Please! Shh!
"All hurried they run..."
-Bleep, bloop, blorp...
128
00:04:13,979 --> 00:04:15,996
Oh, my God!
Why are you acting like this?
129
00:04:16,148 --> 00:04:17,481
Technically,
I'm your imagination, Judy,
130
00:04:17,499 --> 00:04:18,924
so you're doing this
to yourself.
131
00:04:19,151 --> 00:04:20,908
-I'm going inside.
-Miss you.
132
00:04:20,928 --> 00:04:22,986
-(loud whirring)
-Testing out the new vacuum!
133
00:04:23,005 --> 00:04:24,671
Boy, she handles like a dream!
134
00:04:24,765 --> 00:04:26,080
Wolf, I need to work!
135
00:04:26,100 --> 00:04:28,341
Wolf! I gave Judy
vacuuming duties!
136
00:04:28,435 --> 00:04:31,436
You guys weren't kidding--
those Halvorsons really do hack.
137
00:04:31,588 --> 00:04:34,180
-(growls)
-Oh, sick! Monster Brothers!
138
00:04:34,275 --> 00:04:36,108
Monster Brother, singular!
139
00:04:36,259 --> 00:04:38,277
Someone's too busy
to play with me.
140
00:04:38,428 --> 00:04:41,004
-(whirring stops)
-Will you all please
get out of my room?
141
00:04:41,023 --> 00:04:43,006
I really have to memorize
this poem.
142
00:04:43,025 --> 00:04:44,024
Oh, I can help. All right.
143
00:04:44,176 --> 00:04:45,842
What you need is
a mnemonic device.
144
00:04:45,935 --> 00:04:47,344
"Horseman's corset."
145
00:04:47,362 --> 00:04:49,288
Okay, so just say,
"Courseman's horse-it."
146
00:04:49,439 --> 00:04:51,939
-Now you'll never forget.
-Okay, I need some privacy.
147
00:04:52,034 --> 00:04:54,293
Sorry, sorry, thank you,
get out, bye, bye-bye.
148
00:04:54,520 --> 00:04:57,129
♪ Too many Tobins,
too many Tobins ♪
149
00:04:57,280 --> 00:05:01,191
♪ So many Tobins,
too many Tobins ♪
150
00:05:01,209 --> 00:05:03,951
♪ Gonna kill a Tobin,
too many Tobins ♪
151
00:05:04,046 --> 00:05:06,880
♪ So many Tobins in your face! ♪
152
00:05:07,032 --> 00:05:08,198
(screams)
153
00:05:08,216 --> 00:05:10,216
BEEF: Well, even though
I don't celebrate
154
00:05:10,311 --> 00:05:12,811
the Thanksgiving story
of self-absorbed freeloaders
155
00:05:12,962 --> 00:05:15,296
receiving help from strangers
they would later massacre,
156
00:05:15,316 --> 00:05:17,891
I am thankful
we can eat this feast together.
157
00:05:18,043 --> 00:05:20,301
Wait, I'm short a few onions.
158
00:05:20,395 --> 00:05:22,212
I may have used them all
in my practice meals.
159
00:05:22,230 --> 00:05:24,972
Oh, great, who needs flavors
for Thanksgiving?
160
00:05:25,067 --> 00:05:26,733
I would've been happy to go
to the store,
161
00:05:26,885 --> 00:05:29,235
but the chore chief didn't
delegate that to me, so...
162
00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:31,479
(Moon, Ham and Judy mocking)
163
00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:33,390
Everybody seems
a little riled up.
164
00:05:33,408 --> 00:05:35,650
Yeah, this room is tense--
and not the good tense
165
00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:37,002
you feel
right before they reveal
166
00:05:37,153 --> 00:05:38,670
who's the best hitchhiker
on American Driftin'.
167
00:05:38,897 --> 00:05:41,673
-Anybody want to fill me in?
-I do. Everyone is annoying.
168
00:05:41,825 --> 00:05:43,491
-Yep. Uh-huh.
-That's right.
-HAM: Correct.
169
00:05:43,585 --> 00:05:46,236
Ah, I see. Well, I usually save
this for Thanksgiving dinner,
170
00:05:46,254 --> 00:05:48,663
but why don't we go around
and say what we're thankful for
171
00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:50,090
-right now?
-Sure.
172
00:05:50,184 --> 00:05:52,667
I'm so thankful that
everyone's around all the time,
173
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:54,519
and I don't have a moment
of privacy to memorize
174
00:05:54,671 --> 00:05:56,388
"Ye Ballad
of the Sportsman's Horseman"!
175
00:05:56,540 --> 00:05:58,915
-That's not really what I...
-Oh, and I'm so thankful
176
00:05:59,008 --> 00:06:01,509
that I'm no longer chore chief,
even though all I want to do
177
00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:03,770
is show you
how to do things properly!
178
00:06:03,922 --> 00:06:06,198
-Guys...
-Ham, I'm so thankful
179
00:06:06,425 --> 00:06:08,141
that you moved into my room
180
00:06:08,293 --> 00:06:10,869
and now I'm seeing less of you
than ever before.
181
00:06:11,020 --> 00:06:12,204
All right, enough.
182
00:06:12,431 --> 00:06:14,039
I understand sarcasm.
You can all stop now.
183
00:06:14,266 --> 00:06:15,707
-Oh, can we, Dad?
-Oh, good.
-Oh, thank you, Father.
184
00:06:15,934 --> 00:06:17,358
-Can we stop now?
-I'll never stop.
-I'm serious, guys.
185
00:06:17,452 --> 00:06:19,378
What do we need to do
to settle this?
186
00:06:19,529 --> 00:06:21,121
We can do
what the Halvorsons do.
187
00:06:21,215 --> 00:06:23,106
We dig a pit and hit each other
with narwhal bones,
188
00:06:23,125 --> 00:06:25,384
and the last person
to lose consciousness wins.
189
00:06:25,611 --> 00:06:26,885
Instead, why doesn't everyone
190
00:06:27,036 --> 00:06:28,887
turn to the person next to them
and apologize?
191
00:06:29,114 --> 00:06:31,615
OTHERS:
Oh, I'm so sorry.
192
00:06:31,633 --> 00:06:34,284
Okay, never mind.
Let's all just work quietly.
193
00:06:34,302 --> 00:06:37,187
Fine, but if we do need
narwhal bones, I have a guy.
194
00:06:39,958 --> 00:06:42,383
Huh. Where's breakfast?
And where's Dad?
195
00:06:42,477 --> 00:06:44,403
Well, he started
the turkey cooking.
196
00:06:46,573 --> 00:06:47,814
He's not in his room.
197
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:49,799
Look. Dad's ax is still stuck
in the log,
198
00:06:49,818 --> 00:06:52,969
instead of oiled, wiped down,
and safely put away.
199
00:06:53,062 --> 00:06:55,138
-Oh, my God.
-It can't be.
200
00:06:55,157 --> 00:06:57,323
We haven't done one in years.
201
00:06:57,476 --> 00:06:58,324
It is upon us.
202
00:06:58,419 --> 00:07:00,460
Dad has declared a Beef Hunt!
203
00:07:03,498 --> 00:07:05,982
HONEYBEE: Oh, my God,
is this actually a Beef Hunt?
204
00:07:06,075 --> 00:07:07,909
You know about the Beef Hunt?
205
00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:09,169
Yeah, Wolf told me
that when you were kids,
206
00:07:09,263 --> 00:07:11,337
every Thanksgiving
your dad would send you
207
00:07:11,432 --> 00:07:12,747
on an elaborate hunt to test
your outdoor survival skills.
208
00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:14,507
It's like The Amazing Race
meets Survivor,
209
00:07:14,601 --> 00:07:16,342
but without
a sexy middle-aged host.
210
00:07:16,495 --> 00:07:19,329
-Yup, just a sexy,
middle-aged dad.
-Wolf, no.
211
00:07:19,422 --> 00:07:20,997
The winner gets the Beef Belt
212
00:07:21,016 --> 00:07:23,758
and they get to say the swear
word of their choice at dinner.
213
00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:25,277
When I was ten, I said "taint."
214
00:07:25,428 --> 00:07:27,671
I had no idea what it meant, but
I'll never forget the feeling.
215
00:07:27,689 --> 00:07:29,597
And this is the perfect day
for the competition,
216
00:07:29,691 --> 00:07:30,782
because I'm still furious
217
00:07:30,934 --> 00:07:32,192
none of you guys
let me learn my poem!
218
00:07:32,286 --> 00:07:34,678
It's gonna feel extra nice
when I destroy you all!
219
00:07:34,696 --> 00:07:37,622
Ha-ha! No way. I'm gonna
absolutely smash you guys.
220
00:07:37,774 --> 00:07:39,624
Uh, but respectful.
221
00:07:39,776 --> 00:07:41,126
Respect is for Helen Hunts
and Bonnie Hunts.
222
00:07:41,277 --> 00:07:43,128
-This is the Beef Hunt, damn it!
-Shouldn't you be back
223
00:07:43,279 --> 00:07:45,872
making Michigan hot dog
baked brie blasts for Crispin?
224
00:07:46,024 --> 00:07:47,132
You wish I'd drop out.
225
00:07:47,301 --> 00:07:49,283
I'm gonna Michigan hot dog
baked brie blast you guys
226
00:07:49,303 --> 00:07:52,045
-out of the water.
-Loving the trash talk, guys.
227
00:07:52,197 --> 00:07:53,880
-Where are we running to?
-The big field.
228
00:07:54,032 --> 00:07:55,974
That's where
the first challenge always is.
229
00:07:56,125 --> 00:07:57,809
Ooh. Are there gonna be
booby traps?
230
00:07:57,961 --> 00:07:59,202
-MOON: Aah!
-Moon!
231
00:07:59,221 --> 00:08:00,704
Don't look back--
it's every man or woman
232
00:08:00,722 --> 00:08:02,481
for himself or herself
during the Beef Hunt.
233
00:08:02,632 --> 00:08:04,557
-That's right.
-Moon, you caught up already?
234
00:08:04,710 --> 00:08:06,893
Yeah, I learned a new swear
last month,
235
00:08:07,045 --> 00:08:10,563
and I'm really motivated
to say it out loud.
236
00:08:10,716 --> 00:08:11,973
BEEF:
All right,
237
00:08:12,067 --> 00:08:13,641
clearly Wolf and Honeybee
need their space back,
238
00:08:13,735 --> 00:08:16,811
and in order to get it,
they need this toilet back.
239
00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:19,814
So I am going to fix it.
240
00:08:19,941 --> 00:08:21,500
It's just a toilet.
You use one of these
241
00:08:21,651 --> 00:08:24,628
every four days--
nothing to be afraid of.
242
00:08:25,413 --> 00:08:26,320
Nope.
243
00:08:26,414 --> 00:08:28,673
Huh, looks like
a food challenge.
244
00:08:29,325 --> 00:08:31,234
"This first competition
could be a bit hairy.
245
00:08:31,327 --> 00:08:33,995
To do it you'll each have to eat
ten bowls of cranberry."
246
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:35,180
What does this have to do
with surviving
247
00:08:35,331 --> 00:08:37,349
in the wild
on the first Thanksgiving?
248
00:08:37,576 --> 00:08:39,909
-(chomping, moaning)
-Oh, you guys
are already eating.
249
00:08:39,928 --> 00:08:41,353
All done! I won!
250
00:08:41,522 --> 00:08:45,339
I get the winner's envelope and
probably some huge advantage.
251
00:08:45,359 --> 00:08:47,675
"Congratulations,
you finished your food.
252
00:08:47,694 --> 00:08:50,253
Now you must wait
for the rest of the brood"?
253
00:08:50,346 --> 00:08:53,014
"When all of your brothers
and sisters are done,
254
00:08:53,108 --> 00:08:55,759
head to the rock
that looks like Danson."
255
00:08:55,852 --> 00:08:58,778
Ugh! I finished first and now
I have to wait for all of you?
256
00:08:58,930 --> 00:09:01,114
-That sucks.
-Who's Dan's son?
257
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:04,117
No, Ted Danson. We have a rock
that looks just like him.
258
00:09:04,269 --> 00:09:06,119
Ooh! He's
on my famous freebies list!
259
00:09:06,271 --> 00:09:08,529
Wolf, you can't get mad
if I kiss that rock.
260
00:09:08,549 --> 00:09:10,440
You won't be the first.
261
00:09:10,458 --> 00:09:12,217
BEEF: Thanks for coming over
to help me.
262
00:09:12,368 --> 00:09:14,368
That's okay.
I'm going to my daughter's house
263
00:09:14,388 --> 00:09:16,388
for Thanksgiving this year,
so I don't have to cook.
264
00:09:16,539 --> 00:09:18,631
And I never miss a chance
to bowl-browse.
265
00:09:18,784 --> 00:09:20,058
Boy, she ain't much to look at,
266
00:09:20,209 --> 00:09:22,227
but she'll get it done,
am I right?
267
00:09:22,378 --> 00:09:23,469
This all seems pretty simple.
268
00:09:23,564 --> 00:09:24,954
I'm surprised
you can't handle it.
269
00:09:25,048 --> 00:09:26,956
I don't like toilets.
No offense.
270
00:09:27,050 --> 00:09:29,959
I'm not a toilet.
What bugs you about 'em?
271
00:09:30,053 --> 00:09:31,144
That they look
kind of like pelicans,
272
00:09:31,296 --> 00:09:32,737
so when you sit down
it's like you're sitting
273
00:09:32,964 --> 00:09:34,555
-in a pelican's mouth?
-Uh, no.
274
00:09:34,649 --> 00:09:36,983
It was years ago.
I was fixing a toilet,
275
00:09:37,135 --> 00:09:39,077
a pipe burst,
and a very tiny piece of poop
276
00:09:39,228 --> 00:09:41,913
flew through the air
and into my... my mouth!
277
00:09:42,065 --> 00:09:43,915
I spit it out
and gargled with vodka.
278
00:09:44,067 --> 00:09:46,567
Then I googled "full
mouth replacement surgery,"
279
00:09:46,587 --> 00:09:48,569
but they only do it in Romania.
280
00:09:48,589 --> 00:09:50,422
Yeesh! Is that all?
You got your brown wings.
281
00:09:50,573 --> 00:09:52,757
-Happens to me all the time.
-Wait, all the time?
282
00:09:52,984 --> 00:09:54,500
Look, Beef,
I can't do this job for you.
283
00:09:54,595 --> 00:09:56,986
-Why not?
-Because then you'll
always need me to fix it.
284
00:09:57,080 --> 00:09:59,097
You have to face your fear
of the toilet.
285
00:09:59,248 --> 00:10:00,748
-And I'll train you to do it.
-What if,
286
00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:03,993
instead, you fix my toilet,
and I peer over your shoulder
287
00:10:04,087 --> 00:10:06,329
and say, "Ooh, ah, great job"?
288
00:10:06,389 --> 00:10:08,106
No, thanks.
You know I only like compliments
289
00:10:08,333 --> 00:10:10,166
if they're specifically
about my looks.
290
00:10:10,185 --> 00:10:11,835
-You're beautiful.
-Obviously.
291
00:10:11,928 --> 00:10:13,278
But you're still fixing
that toilet.
292
00:10:13,505 --> 00:10:16,948
-There it is!
-That is one handsome
Sam Malone stone.
293
00:10:17,100 --> 00:10:18,341
I feel like I'm at Cheers.
294
00:10:18,360 --> 00:10:20,343
Look. this stack of cards
has my name on it.
295
00:10:20,362 --> 00:10:22,120
-It says I'm supposed to host
a trivia quiz.
-Trivia quiz?
296
00:10:22,271 --> 00:10:24,122
This doesn't sound like Dad
at all.
297
00:10:24,349 --> 00:10:25,624
Maybe he was in a hurry
298
00:10:25,775 --> 00:10:27,274
and downloaded another
family's hunt off the Internet.
299
00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:28,627
Other families
don't do this, guys.
300
00:10:28,778 --> 00:10:30,870
Okay, everybody line up
and make a buzzing noise
301
00:10:31,022 --> 00:10:32,113
if you think
you know the answer.
302
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:33,706
"Where did Judy put
her Frida Kahlo
303
00:10:33,859 --> 00:10:36,876
and Emily Dickinson dolls
when she was five, and why?"
304
00:10:37,028 --> 00:10:38,619
-Honk! I mean, uh, buzz!
-Wolf!
305
00:10:38,713 --> 00:10:40,530
-Ugh!
-She hid them
in the refrigerator
306
00:10:40,548 --> 00:10:43,049
so they could do their important
work without being subject
307
00:10:43,201 --> 00:10:45,644
to the patriarchal gaze
of Ham's Ninja Turtles.
308
00:10:45,795 --> 00:10:47,720
Correct.
Now I hand you the card.
309
00:10:47,873 --> 00:10:48,980
Question two.
310
00:10:49,207 --> 00:10:50,556
Correct.
Correct.
311
00:10:50,709 --> 00:10:52,633
Oof. That's upsetting,
but it's correct.
312
00:10:52,653 --> 00:10:53,634
Correct.
313
00:10:53,654 --> 00:10:55,211
Okay, last question.
314
00:10:55,230 --> 00:10:57,380
-"This was Moon's favorite snack
when he was four."
-Buzz!
315
00:10:57,473 --> 00:10:59,658
A ham sandwich. And he'd make
aggressive eye contact
316
00:10:59,809 --> 00:11:00,975
with Ham while eating it.
317
00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,402
I thought the meat came
from his back.
318
00:11:02,496 --> 00:11:04,904
-Ding-ding-ding!
-Yes! I got the most right!
319
00:11:05,056 --> 00:11:06,572
Suck it!
Give me the winner's envelope.
320
00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:08,574
Ooh, what do I get?
A head start or...?
321
00:11:08,727 --> 00:11:09,742
Eh. This is just a note.
322
00:11:09,895 --> 00:11:11,561
"Winning this round
isn't that hard.
323
00:11:11,579 --> 00:11:13,579
Take a look
at the back of your cards."
324
00:11:13,674 --> 00:11:16,007
-Mine's just a squiggly drawing.
-Mine, too.
325
00:11:16,234 --> 00:11:18,234
And mine just says "map" on it.
326
00:11:18,253 --> 00:11:19,827
It's a map!
We have to put it together!
327
00:11:19,921 --> 00:11:21,921
MOON:
Looks like we go to this "X"
328
00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:23,682
by the river
down past the fallen tree
329
00:11:23,909 --> 00:11:26,759
-that looks like
Sigourney Weaver's elbow.
-HONEYBEE: My God,
330
00:11:26,912 --> 00:11:28,335
this area is full
of celebrities.
331
00:11:28,430 --> 00:11:31,672
Yeah, this is basically
Lone Moose's Walk of Fame.
332
00:11:31,692 --> 00:11:34,267
Look! There's a raft!
333
00:11:35,253 --> 00:11:37,195
"You're family
in foul and fair weather,
334
00:11:37,346 --> 00:11:39,272
and the glue
that keeps this raft together."
335
00:11:39,424 --> 00:11:41,348
And there's another little map
of where we're supposed
336
00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:42,592
-to take the boat to.
-Ugh!
337
00:11:42,610 --> 00:11:44,110
So we're still
all sticking together,
338
00:11:44,262 --> 00:11:46,446
floating on a boat
that was premade?
339
00:11:46,598 --> 00:11:48,097
This isn't like
a Beef Hunt at all.
340
00:11:48,116 --> 00:11:49,874
We should each be alone
in the woods somewhere,
341
00:11:50,026 --> 00:11:51,784
trying to squeeze drinking water
out of a dead frog.
342
00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:53,937
Okay, We need to get
to this spot.
343
00:11:54,030 --> 00:11:55,621
Let me hold the card, Judy.
344
00:11:55,774 --> 00:11:58,032
I can hold a card, Wolf. I'm 16.
345
00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,700
Oh, no. I was supposed
to preheat the oven
346
00:11:59,794 --> 00:12:01,160
for my casserole, and I forgot!
347
00:12:01,312 --> 00:12:02,387
Great, more cooking.
348
00:12:02,538 --> 00:12:05,039
-Did you want
to say something, Moon?
-Yes.
349
00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:07,784
You've been acting
like an ass-erole all wee...
350
00:12:07,802 --> 00:12:09,144
(all scream)
351
00:12:13,049 --> 00:12:15,883
We're gonna drown!
Oh, wait, no, we can stand.
352
00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:17,810
-(Judy shivering)
-Dad built a bad boat?
353
00:12:17,963 --> 00:12:20,146
Every belief I have about
the world has been shattered,
354
00:12:20,298 --> 00:12:22,723
but I don't have time
to process it right now.
355
00:12:22,743 --> 00:12:24,576
Hey! A box!
356
00:12:24,727 --> 00:12:28,304
Ooh, good, a change of clothes.
I'm freezing.
357
00:12:28,323 --> 00:12:30,823
I guess I've grown a lot
since Dad bought these.
358
00:12:30,917 --> 00:12:32,658
(laughs)
Why did he buy them?
359
00:12:32,753 --> 00:12:34,085
After Mom left, Dad went through
360
00:12:34,237 --> 00:12:36,312
a pretty serious
Home Shopping Network phase.
361
00:12:36,331 --> 00:12:38,590
He bought the whole family
matching sweat suits
362
00:12:38,783 --> 00:12:40,316
at his absolute lowest moment.
363
00:12:40,335 --> 00:12:42,485
He also bought
something called a Wow-el.
364
00:12:42,504 --> 00:12:44,262
It's a towel
that makes you go, "Wow."
365
00:12:44,489 --> 00:12:45,930
Hey, there's a note in my pocket
366
00:12:46,082 --> 00:12:48,600
that says we should head
for that ridge over there.
367
00:12:48,827 --> 00:12:52,103
(whistles)
Mother maze I.
368
00:12:52,255 --> 00:12:54,847
Relax, Beef, she's dry.
You can do this.
369
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:56,182
I want you to pet the toilet.
370
00:12:56,334 --> 00:12:59,593
-Mm. Um...
-Just like that. Easy, now.
371
00:12:59,687 --> 00:13:00,779
Give her a little tickle
under her bowl.
372
00:13:00,930 --> 00:13:01,946
-She likes that.
-(groaning)
373
00:13:02,098 --> 00:13:03,948
See? She's real friendly.
And now
374
00:13:04,100 --> 00:13:05,432
you're ready
for your next challenge.
375
00:13:05,527 --> 00:13:06,451
(gasps)
376
00:13:06,678 --> 00:13:08,036
She brought friends.
377
00:13:09,030 --> 00:13:10,622
"No one goes through life
alone-ah,
378
00:13:10,849 --> 00:13:12,273
"every Angela needs their Mona.
379
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:14,108
"Without Jonathan,
Samantha would be lost,
380
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:16,961
so show this maze
Who's the Boss?"
381
00:13:17,113 --> 00:13:19,372
This is just like when I got
lost trying to find my way back
382
00:13:19,524 --> 00:13:21,024
to the table at Pasta de Bupo.
383
00:13:21,042 --> 00:13:23,209
I made so many friends
that night.
384
00:13:23,361 --> 00:13:24,877
♪ ♪
385
00:13:25,030 --> 00:13:26,471
-Huh?
-What?
386
00:13:26,698 --> 00:13:28,455
-No way.
-No.
387
00:13:28,475 --> 00:13:31,701
Ugh! It's been over an hour.
This maze is unsolvable.
388
00:13:31,719 --> 00:13:33,127
We must be missing something.
389
00:13:33,221 --> 00:13:35,129
Why did dad put
Who's the Boss? in the clue?
390
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:36,889
He hated that show.
He thought they dragged out
391
00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:38,465
the will-they-won't-they
too long.
392
00:13:38,560 --> 00:13:41,210
(gasps)
I know why! Alyssa Mouse-lano!
393
00:13:41,229 --> 00:13:43,470
-Me and Moon's secret pet mouse!
-Right.
394
00:13:43,565 --> 00:13:46,215
We made her a huge,
incredibly complex maze.
395
00:13:46,234 --> 00:13:48,309
This maze must be based
on that one.
396
00:13:48,436 --> 00:13:51,904
Ooh! Then there should be a
single Skittle at the end. Dibs!
397
00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:54,891
Okay, all right, a right here...
398
00:13:54,909 --> 00:13:56,609
a right here...
399
00:13:56,761 --> 00:13:57,727
a left here...
400
00:13:57,820 --> 00:13:59,245
MOON:
Everybody duck.
401
00:13:59,397 --> 00:14:00,580
We did it!
402
00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:03,566
Moon! Ham! You got us
through that cram-dam maze!
403
00:14:03,585 --> 00:14:05,251
You're welcome.
For a minute there,
404
00:14:05,403 --> 00:14:07,178
I forgot we were all competing
against each other.
405
00:14:07,405 --> 00:14:08,588
I didn't forget.
406
00:14:08,682 --> 00:14:10,907
I'm gonna beat you all
to that weird bridge wizard!
407
00:14:10,925 --> 00:14:12,408
That might not be
a bridge wizard.
408
00:14:12,501 --> 00:14:15,336
It might just be a regular
wizard standing near a bridge.
409
00:14:15,430 --> 00:14:18,172
I want you to lie down
across that row of toilets
410
00:14:18,266 --> 00:14:20,674
-and close your eyes.
-That's the devil's couch!
411
00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:22,676
Hey, normally I'd have you sleep
with the toilet
412
00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:24,678
in your bed for a week
and let nature take its course.
413
00:14:24,698 --> 00:14:27,757
-What does that mean?
-Stop thinking and start laying.
414
00:14:27,775 --> 00:14:28,941
(groaning)
415
00:14:29,094 --> 00:14:30,869
-I did it.
-Nope. Stay.
416
00:14:31,020 --> 00:14:33,554
-Let the discomfort sink in.
-(groans)
417
00:14:33,615 --> 00:14:35,689
Okay, now roll over
onto your front.
418
00:14:35,783 --> 00:14:37,542
With my face on the toilet?
419
00:14:37,693 --> 00:14:39,193
Yes, that's what they mean
when they say
420
00:14:39,212 --> 00:14:40,953
you have to face your fears--
you have to actually put
421
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:44,107
-your face on your fears.
-I don't think
that's what they mean.
422
00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:46,217
Hey! Put your yapper
on that crapper!
423
00:14:48,463 --> 00:14:49,946
See?
Your mouth is on the toilet,
424
00:14:49,964 --> 00:14:51,614
but that doesn't mean
there's poop in it.
425
00:14:51,633 --> 00:14:53,633
I hate this so much.
426
00:14:53,785 --> 00:14:55,284
But there's no poop
in your mouth, right?
427
00:14:55,303 --> 00:14:57,803
You're right.
There's no poop in my mouth.
428
00:14:57,898 --> 00:14:59,880
Embrace your poop-free mouth,
Beef!
429
00:14:59,900 --> 00:15:01,215
I feel so free.
430
00:15:01,309 --> 00:15:03,568
I'm flying! I'm flying!
431
00:15:03,719 --> 00:15:05,978
Greetings, hunters,
432
00:15:06,131 --> 00:15:08,239
and a festive Thanksgiving
to you.
433
00:15:08,391 --> 00:15:10,057
I am the wizard Granthar,
434
00:15:10,151 --> 00:15:14,804
and I will now play you
a welcome song upon my lute.
435
00:15:14,897 --> 00:15:15,972
(high-pitched):
♪ La ♪
436
00:15:16,065 --> 00:15:17,248
♪ Welcome, young travelers... ♪
437
00:15:17,475 --> 00:15:19,733
Uh, Santiago, is it cool
if we just do the challenge?
438
00:15:19,753 --> 00:15:22,086
-It's getting kind of late
in the day.
-But your father said
439
00:15:22,238 --> 00:15:23,496
I could have fun with it.
440
00:15:23,648 --> 00:15:25,590
Fine. In order
to pass over the bridge,
441
00:15:25,741 --> 00:15:26,925
you must recite the poem
442
00:15:27,152 --> 00:15:29,093
"Ye Ballad
of the Sportsman's Horseman."
443
00:15:29,245 --> 00:15:31,821
-Oh, no! I don't know it!
-For every correct line,
444
00:15:31,839 --> 00:15:35,249
you may all take one step
across the bridge.
445
00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:37,677
-All together? Again?
-Why would Dad do this?
446
00:15:37,771 --> 00:15:41,164
-I haven't memorized it yet.
-Judy, you have to try.
447
00:15:41,182 --> 00:15:44,000
Okay, here goes.
"The horseman's corset
448
00:15:44,018 --> 00:15:46,093
forces
the lord's reinforcements."
449
00:15:46,187 --> 00:15:48,613
Correct. You may all take
one step forward.
450
00:15:48,840 --> 00:15:50,114
The next line, please?
451
00:15:50,266 --> 00:15:51,950
"Worried? Flurried?"
452
00:15:52,101 --> 00:15:54,118
No, that's wrong.
See? I don't know it.
453
00:15:54,345 --> 00:15:55,678
"All hurried they run,
454
00:15:55,771 --> 00:15:58,347
scurrying, worrying, furry,
and slurrying."
455
00:15:58,366 --> 00:16:00,774
-Correct.
-Moon! Oh, my God!
456
00:16:00,868 --> 00:16:02,627
I heard you do it
a hundred times.
457
00:16:02,854 --> 00:16:04,353
I guess I memorized part of it.
458
00:16:04,372 --> 00:16:07,448
"The birds' beaks
peak and screech, beseeching..."
459
00:16:07,467 --> 00:16:10,710
"And... bequeathing
a maiden's teat!"
460
00:16:10,862 --> 00:16:12,786
Correct, and correct.
461
00:16:12,880 --> 00:16:14,621
"The sport is upon us
at the court."
462
00:16:14,716 --> 00:16:16,457
JUDY AND HONEYBEE:
"The gentleman pats his seat."
463
00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:18,142
-(cheering, whooping)
-We did it!
-Oh, my God!
464
00:16:18,369 --> 00:16:19,793
We did that stupid poem!
465
00:16:19,813 --> 00:16:20,979
And now a victory song.
466
00:16:21,130 --> 00:16:22,722
(high-pitched):
♪ La ♪
467
00:16:22,816 --> 00:16:26,042
♪ Welcome, young travelers
who come from afar... ♪
468
00:16:26,060 --> 00:16:28,711
Santiago, this is clearly
just your welcome song.
469
00:16:28,730 --> 00:16:31,063
Just tell us the next challenge,
Santiago.
470
00:16:31,157 --> 00:16:33,157
Fine, but I'm using
my wizard voice.
471
00:16:33,309 --> 00:16:35,326
"You've eaten and run
and managed not to drown.
472
00:16:35,478 --> 00:16:38,645
Now you shall find the last
challenge in old Tobin Town."
473
00:16:38,740 --> 00:16:40,239
(high-pitched):
♪ La ♪
474
00:16:40,391 --> 00:16:43,075
♪ Farewell, young travelers,
wherever you... ♪
475
00:16:43,228 --> 00:16:44,560
Santiago, no.
476
00:16:44,579 --> 00:16:46,004
KYLE:
All right, before you do this,
477
00:16:46,155 --> 00:16:47,821
I'd like to give you something.
478
00:16:47,915 --> 00:16:49,565
This is my magic wrench.
479
00:16:49,584 --> 00:16:51,901
No poop can touch you
while you're using that wrench.
480
00:16:51,919 --> 00:16:54,086
Is this, like, a Dumbo thing,
where it's not really magic,
481
00:16:54,239 --> 00:16:55,513
but I'm supposed to believe
in it?
482
00:16:55,664 --> 00:16:57,682
You got me, Tobin.
Now fix that toilet.
483
00:16:57,833 --> 00:16:59,242
Also, what's Dumbo?
484
00:16:59,260 --> 00:17:01,352
Tobin Town,
our childhood tree house.
485
00:17:01,504 --> 00:17:03,246
(chuckles): I haven't been
back here in years.
486
00:17:03,339 --> 00:17:06,357
Uh, probably because a series
of storms left it very unsafe.
487
00:17:06,584 --> 00:17:09,027
"To get this hunt in the bag,
Wolf has got to capture a flag.
488
00:17:09,136 --> 00:17:11,087
"But the twist is,
I'm taking his sight,
489
00:17:11,105 --> 00:17:13,031
and it's up to you others
to steer him right."
490
00:17:13,224 --> 00:17:15,182
And then it says you have to put
this blindfold on
491
00:17:15,276 --> 00:17:18,036
-and we guide you to the top.
-This should be no problem.
492
00:17:18,263 --> 00:17:19,871
I have
amazing natural instincts.
493
00:17:20,098 --> 00:17:21,931
-(grunts)
-(grunts) See? That was a tree.
494
00:17:22,024 --> 00:17:24,000
-That was Moon.
-He's gonna die.
495
00:17:28,048 --> 00:17:29,288
Pull yourself up
through the opening above you.
496
00:17:29,440 --> 00:17:30,715
-Are you sure?
-Yes.
497
00:17:30,866 --> 00:17:32,108
You have to trust us.
498
00:17:32,201 --> 00:17:34,201
-(whimpers)
-HAM: Okay, go to your left.
499
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,387
Be careful,
'cause the railings are broken.
500
00:17:36,614 --> 00:17:38,372
JUDY: Stop! Watch out
for the big branch
501
00:17:38,466 --> 00:17:40,116
coming through the floor, okay?
502
00:17:40,209 --> 00:17:42,393
Slide to your left
and step over it.
503
00:17:42,545 --> 00:17:43,302
HAM:
Okay.
504
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:44,804
Keep going. Now grab the flag.
505
00:17:44,898 --> 00:17:47,456
It's right in front of you.
506
00:17:47,550 --> 00:17:49,025
I did it!
507
00:17:49,794 --> 00:17:50,976
Great job, babe.
508
00:17:51,129 --> 00:17:52,570
We've been going all day,
and we're still tied.
509
00:17:52,797 --> 00:17:54,888
How is anyone supposed
to win this Beef Hunt?
510
00:17:54,908 --> 00:17:57,800
(gasps)
Ooh! I guess by pulling this.
511
00:17:57,893 --> 00:17:59,726
(all scream)
512
00:18:00,638 --> 00:18:03,730
-(bell dings)
-Ah, and now to check on the
other thing I've got cooking.
513
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:07,067
Guys, I think I'm gonna go ahead
and say my swear now.
514
00:18:07,087 --> 00:18:09,069
-(bleep)
-Oh, my God!
-Yeesh!
515
00:18:09,163 --> 00:18:10,755
SANTIAGO (high-pitched):
♪ La ♪
516
00:18:10,906 --> 00:18:12,072
♪ Welcome, young travelers ♪
517
00:18:12,092 --> 00:18:14,074
♪ Who've come from afar ♪
518
00:18:14,210 --> 00:18:16,836
♪ A fresh cup of mead
sits for you on the bar... ♪
519
00:18:16,988 --> 00:18:18,154
JUDY:
Santiago...
520
00:18:18,172 --> 00:18:20,080
You're trapped now.
You can't stop me.
521
00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:22,174
-♪ Would you care
for some starlight... ♪
-Granthar, please.
522
00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:24,585
I'm expecting my boyfriend
and his parents
523
00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:25,919
for Thanksgiving dinner.
524
00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:27,754
Fine.
Please just put on the costumes
525
00:18:27,774 --> 00:18:29,014
you'll find in the cage,
526
00:18:29,167 --> 00:18:30,441
and I'll read you the card.
527
00:18:30,634 --> 00:18:32,944
And now for the final challenge.
(clears throat)
528
00:18:33,095 --> 00:18:35,113
"Here you are
at the finish line,
529
00:18:35,340 --> 00:18:37,931
"held together
like a raft with twine.
530
00:18:38,025 --> 00:18:39,450
"You were supposed to learn
a lesson,
531
00:18:39,677 --> 00:18:41,844
"but now you're trapped
and you're still guessin'.
532
00:18:41,863 --> 00:18:44,122
"I think that you
would learn a lot-o
533
00:18:44,273 --> 00:18:48,184
if you would recite
the family motto."
534
00:18:48,202 --> 00:18:49,127
Family motto?
535
00:18:49,278 --> 00:18:50,686
I don't know
what he's talking about.
536
00:18:50,705 --> 00:18:52,037
And what lesson
were we supposed to learn?
537
00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:53,947
The Beef Hunt is
about brute competition
538
00:18:53,967 --> 00:18:55,299
and shoving people
into snowbanks.
539
00:18:55,451 --> 00:18:57,135
And shouting, "See you in hell."
540
00:18:57,362 --> 00:19:00,138
And why did he say the raft
was held together with twine?
541
00:19:00,365 --> 00:19:01,881
The raft totally fell apart.
542
00:19:01,975 --> 00:19:04,124
(sighs)
Guys, we've been so stupid.
543
00:19:04,144 --> 00:19:06,202
Dad's been trying
to tell us something all day,
544
00:19:06,220 --> 00:19:07,203
and we weren't listening.
545
00:19:07,221 --> 00:19:08,980
The note said we were the glue.
546
00:19:09,207 --> 00:19:10,982
We're supposed to hold
the raft together.
547
00:19:11,209 --> 00:19:13,709
But we were too busy fighting
to understand.
548
00:19:13,728 --> 00:19:16,045
And all the stops along the way
were to remind us
549
00:19:16,063 --> 00:19:17,229
to be thankful for each other.
550
00:19:17,382 --> 00:19:19,882
The trivia quiz
with all the happy memories.
551
00:19:19,975 --> 00:19:21,975
The mouse maze
from our beautiful youth.
552
00:19:21,995 --> 00:19:24,144
You guys helping me remember
my stupid poem.
553
00:19:24,238 --> 00:19:26,889
Yeah, and I bravely and
majestically climbed this fort
554
00:19:26,908 --> 00:19:28,315
while blindfolded.
555
00:19:28,409 --> 00:19:30,001
Okay, I guess with
a little help from you guys.
556
00:19:30,228 --> 00:19:32,319
Well, I didn't need to learn
any lessons.
557
00:19:32,338 --> 00:19:33,838
I've been an angel all week.
558
00:19:33,989 --> 00:19:35,748
I've just been drinking my wine
and reading my Viking books.
559
00:19:35,900 --> 00:19:38,234
Oh, my God, the motto--
it's from the Viking books!
560
00:19:38,327 --> 00:19:41,495
Oh, right! Duh.
We're all dressed as Vikings.
561
00:19:41,514 --> 00:19:44,240
We're supposed to do the
Hacking Halvorsons family motto.
562
00:19:44,242 --> 00:19:45,999
Everybody remember it?
563
00:19:46,019 --> 00:19:47,426
I will eat the bones and flesh
564
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:50,095
of anyone who hurts my
Halvorson brothers and sisters.
565
00:19:50,248 --> 00:19:51,914
And I will use their kneecaps
as saucers
566
00:19:51,933 --> 00:19:53,265
and their skulls as bowls
567
00:19:53,418 --> 00:19:55,084
for the stew I make
from their brains.
568
00:19:55,177 --> 00:19:58,237
All hail Ragnar the Unyielding!
569
00:19:59,032 --> 00:20:00,940
-(cheering)
-My Vikings!
570
00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:02,200
I trust you've learned
the lesson
571
00:20:02,351 --> 00:20:03,534
I was trying to impart.
572
00:20:03,761 --> 00:20:05,536
That we should stop acting
like jerky-turkeys
573
00:20:05,688 --> 00:20:07,096
during Thanksgiving week?
574
00:20:07,189 --> 00:20:08,981
Yes. Usually the Beef Hunt
is about learning to survive
575
00:20:09,042 --> 00:20:10,766
in the wilderness,
but this year's Beef Hunt
576
00:20:10,785 --> 00:20:12,859
was about learning
to be grateful for your family.
577
00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:14,437
And I knew you guys would do it.
578
00:20:14,455 --> 00:20:16,196
Well, that's not totally true--
I also fixed the toilet
579
00:20:16,290 --> 00:20:18,774
in the guest cabin
in case you didn't do it.
580
00:20:18,867 --> 00:20:21,034
But wait, there's still
one thing I can't figure out.
581
00:20:21,054 --> 00:20:22,720
How did eating
all that cranberry sauce
582
00:20:22,947 --> 00:20:24,296
make us feel grateful
for each other?
583
00:20:24,390 --> 00:20:26,949
It didn't. I just bought too
much cranberry sauce on sale,
584
00:20:26,951 --> 00:20:28,208
and it was about to expire.
585
00:20:28,228 --> 00:20:30,469
Is there a place
at the Thanksgiving table
586
00:20:30,621 --> 00:20:31,878
for Granthar the wizard?
587
00:20:31,898 --> 00:20:33,731
Of course, Santiago. Come along.
588
00:20:33,958 --> 00:20:35,900
SANTIAGO:
I'll have to keep my robe on
for dinner.
589
00:20:36,127 --> 00:20:37,977
I'm quite nude underneath.
590
00:20:38,071 --> 00:20:39,886
HAM:
Does anybody want
591
00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:41,480
more French-fried
fish stick flan?
592
00:20:41,632 --> 00:20:43,649
(chuckles):
Oh, no, I couldn't possibly.
593
00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:46,393
Honey,
I think it's flan-tastic.
594
00:20:47,154 --> 00:20:49,638
Well, today was a big success:
I finally fixed a toilet,
595
00:20:49,732 --> 00:20:51,974
and you guys learned
how to get along again.
596
00:20:51,993 --> 00:20:53,918
And even though I didn't win
the Beef Hunt,
597
00:20:54,028 --> 00:20:55,402
I finally got to say (bleep).
598
00:20:55,421 --> 00:20:56,829
-No!
-Moon!
599
00:20:56,981 --> 00:20:59,072
♪ Runnin' through the halls ♪
600
00:20:59,166 --> 00:21:01,592
♪ Coats over our heads ♪
601
00:21:01,819 --> 00:21:03,761
♪ Poppin' out of closets ♪
602
00:21:03,988 --> 00:21:05,821
♪ Make you shake with dread ♪
603
00:21:05,914 --> 00:21:09,600
♪ We're the Monster Brothers ♪
604
00:21:09,752 --> 00:21:11,510
♪ A terrifying team ♪
605
00:21:11,662 --> 00:21:16,274
♪ Sure to make you cry
and fart and scream ♪
606
00:21:16,425 --> 00:21:18,776
♪ We're the nightmare
brother duo ♪
607
00:21:19,003 --> 00:21:21,112
♪ Of your dreams ♪
608
00:21:21,263 --> 00:21:23,948
♪ Gonna ruin your whole night ♪
609
00:21:24,099 --> 00:21:26,467
♪ A terrifying team ♪
610
00:21:26,527 --> 00:21:28,602
♪ The monster brother duo
of your dreams. ♪
611
00:21:28,696 --> 00:21:30,454
Captioning sponsored by
BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT
612
00:21:30,606 --> 00:21:32,248
and TOYOTA.