1 00:00:02,394 --> 00:00:03,836 -♪ Look up there ♪ -♪ What do you see? ♪ 2 00:00:04,063 --> 00:00:05,412 ♪ Nature and stuff ♪ 3 00:00:05,564 --> 00:00:06,897 -♪ Like a rock ♪ -♪ And a tree ♪ 4 00:00:06,990 --> 00:00:09,566 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 5 00:00:09,659 --> 00:00:13,237 ♪ Way up here, you can breathe the air ♪ 6 00:00:13,330 --> 00:00:14,329 ♪ Catch some fish ♪ 7 00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:16,073 ♪ Or gaze at a bear ♪ 8 00:00:16,091 --> 00:00:17,241 ♪ Wow ♪ 9 00:00:17,259 --> 00:00:20,761 ♪ Oh, the Great North ♪ 10 00:00:20,929 --> 00:00:22,095 ♪ Here we live, oh, oh ♪ 11 00:00:22,172 --> 00:00:23,580 ♪ Here we'll stay, oh, whoo ♪ 12 00:00:23,673 --> 00:00:25,190 ♪ From longest night to longest day ♪ 13 00:00:25,417 --> 00:00:29,194 ♪ In the Great North. ♪ 14 00:00:30,865 --> 00:00:33,240 [cheering] 15 00:00:33,868 --> 00:00:36,593 [dramatic music] 16 00:00:37,204 --> 00:00:39,279 Diondra Tundra coming to you live 17 00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:42,190 from Lone Moose's Fat Bear Week headquarters. 18 00:00:42,359 --> 00:00:44,284 We're halfway through the week, and local favorites 19 00:00:44,378 --> 00:00:46,953 Bearon Stone, Harry Smiles, 20 00:00:47,122 --> 00:00:49,531 and Mangela Likes-Berries are going strong 21 00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:51,942 as they try to topple our champ of champs, 22 00:00:52,035 --> 00:00:53,777 -The Kid. -[growls] 23 00:00:53,796 --> 00:00:55,370 The Kid! That's my guy. 24 00:00:55,464 --> 00:00:58,039 And me. I'm one of Dad's guys as well. 25 00:00:58,059 --> 00:00:59,283 Okay, babe, calm down. 26 00:00:59,301 --> 00:01:00,708 [Diondra] But shaking things up, 27 00:01:00,728 --> 00:01:02,895 last night a new bear lumbered onto the scene 28 00:01:03,046 --> 00:01:03,896 up at Hulls Falls. 29 00:01:04,047 --> 00:01:05,564 They call him The Hunk, 30 00:01:05,749 --> 00:01:08,141 and he's putting the reigning champion on notice. 31 00:01:08,235 --> 00:01:10,977 [scoffs] And I'm putting The Hunk on notice 32 00:01:11,072 --> 00:01:13,630 that he is not good. 33 00:01:13,723 --> 00:01:14,907 Harsh, Dad. 34 00:01:15,134 --> 00:01:16,558 So come on down to the VFW again tonight 35 00:01:16,652 --> 00:01:18,726 to place your bets on which bear will 36 00:01:18,746 --> 00:01:21,305 tip the scales and be crowned Fattest Bear 37 00:01:21,323 --> 00:01:23,082 at the final weigh-in this weekend. 38 00:01:23,309 --> 00:01:25,342 Yeesh, all this bear propaganda makes me feel like 39 00:01:25,344 --> 00:01:27,144 you reds are stumping for Mother Russia. 40 00:01:27,162 --> 00:01:28,587 Good morning, Dirtrude. 41 00:01:28,738 --> 00:01:29,830 Pardon our enthusiasm, 42 00:01:29,924 --> 00:01:31,998 but it is Lone Moose Fat Bear Week. 43 00:01:32,093 --> 00:01:34,151 In my day, the only thing we did involving bears 44 00:01:34,286 --> 00:01:35,335 was kill and eat 'em. 45 00:01:35,487 --> 00:01:36,911 Well, now, instead of eating them, 46 00:01:36,931 --> 00:01:38,097 we see how much they eat 47 00:01:38,248 --> 00:01:40,099 before they go into hibernation. 48 00:01:40,175 --> 00:01:42,618 And you can even gamble on which bear is gonna end up 49 00:01:42,620 --> 00:01:43,660 weighing the most. 50 00:01:43,679 --> 00:01:45,104 Dirt, you just let me or Judy know 51 00:01:45,331 --> 00:01:47,272 if you want to go all in on one of our furry friends. 52 00:01:47,424 --> 00:01:49,516 We are Zoya's apprentice bookies. 53 00:01:49,668 --> 00:01:51,426 You want some action on Beary Steenburgen? 54 00:01:51,595 --> 00:01:53,946 Let me tell you, she's the dark horse. 55 00:01:54,173 --> 00:01:56,506 Oh, please, everyone's a pretender compared to The Kid. 56 00:01:56,600 --> 00:01:59,192 He's a true legend. He's smart, stunning, 57 00:01:59,361 --> 00:02:01,269 he's survived being hit by two trains, 58 00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:03,789 and he's won Fat Bear 11 years running. 59 00:02:03,940 --> 00:02:05,773 We stan a train-damaged king. 60 00:02:05,793 --> 00:02:08,368 If you love this bear so much, Beef, why don't you marry him? 61 00:02:08,445 --> 00:02:10,278 You joke, but I did make Dad a wedding cake 62 00:02:10,297 --> 00:02:12,280 with a topper of The Kid eating Dad. 63 00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:14,949 I loved that cake. And I love all of you. 64 00:02:14,969 --> 00:02:17,027 It's amazing that we all get to be here 65 00:02:17,045 --> 00:02:19,972 on this big, crazy, space marble together. 66 00:02:20,199 --> 00:02:21,381 ♪ If you'll be my bodyguard ♪ 67 00:02:21,533 --> 00:02:24,143 ♪ I can be your long-lost pal. ♪ 68 00:02:24,294 --> 00:02:25,978 Okay, secret family meeting now. 69 00:02:26,129 --> 00:02:27,128 Aunt Dirt, can we use your bunker? 70 00:02:27,222 --> 00:02:28,555 -Ten bucks. -Dirt. 71 00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:29,964 Now it's a hundred. 72 00:02:30,042 --> 00:02:31,132 [Judy] Guys, real talk. 73 00:02:31,226 --> 00:02:33,134 Dad is in a Beef glow. Right? 74 00:02:33,154 --> 00:02:34,561 What the hell is a Beef glow? 75 00:02:34,655 --> 00:02:37,881 Well, when Dad is depressed, we call it a Beef melt, 76 00:02:37,974 --> 00:02:39,549 -but a glow... -It usually means 77 00:02:39,568 --> 00:02:42,052 that something truly exciting and completely unexpected 78 00:02:42,145 --> 00:02:43,162 has come into his life. 79 00:02:43,313 --> 00:02:45,555 And Beef glows are very rare. 80 00:02:45,574 --> 00:02:48,024 He's only been in a glow once in my lifetime. 81 00:02:48,151 --> 00:02:50,502 When he saw Dionne Warwick at the airport. 82 00:02:50,729 --> 00:02:52,820 I figured his good mood was just a side effect 83 00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,748 of Lone Moose Fat Bear Week. 84 00:02:54,900 --> 00:02:56,249 I wish that's all it was. 85 00:02:56,326 --> 00:02:58,735 Moon, you know why Dad is in a Beef glow? 86 00:02:58,904 --> 00:02:59,994 I do. 87 00:03:00,014 --> 00:03:01,905 It's a reason so dark and ominous, 88 00:03:01,998 --> 00:03:03,573 I can barely speak it. 89 00:03:03,592 --> 00:03:04,758 Speak it, hoss. 90 00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:05,926 Debbie Van told me. 91 00:03:06,078 --> 00:03:07,186 She was working on a school project 92 00:03:07,337 --> 00:03:09,337 at her dad's house-- we had to create dioramas 93 00:03:09,356 --> 00:03:11,005 about the dangers of vape smoke-- 94 00:03:11,083 --> 00:03:12,840 and she needed some cotton balls. 95 00:03:12,935 --> 00:03:14,008 Mm, gorgeous idea, go on. 96 00:03:14,028 --> 00:03:15,343 [Moon] But her dad was out, 97 00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:17,029 so she walked over to her mom's house 98 00:03:17,256 --> 00:03:19,031 -unannounced and... -[laughing] 99 00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:21,441 -[Debbie] Mom? Moon's dad? -[Beef gasps] 100 00:03:21,593 --> 00:03:23,276 [screams] 101 00:03:23,429 --> 00:03:25,871 Holy hell, Dad and Carissa are dating? 102 00:03:26,022 --> 00:03:27,113 And bathing? 103 00:03:27,266 --> 00:03:28,615 Oh, man. What a lucky lady. 104 00:03:28,767 --> 00:03:32,044 Snagging a middle-aged divorced father of four? Jackpot. 105 00:03:32,195 --> 00:03:33,378 How long has this been going on? 106 00:03:33,530 --> 00:03:35,288 I don't know and I never want to know. 107 00:03:35,441 --> 00:03:37,216 I'm actually gonna go halfsies with Debbie 108 00:03:37,292 --> 00:03:39,443 on a memory eraser from Men in Black 3. 109 00:03:39,536 --> 00:03:41,795 She found one on Facebook Marketplace. 110 00:03:41,947 --> 00:03:44,448 Well, seems like Dad isn't ready to tell us about this yet, 111 00:03:44,466 --> 00:03:47,542 so let's just keep it under our hats and play it cool. 112 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:49,228 [groaning] 113 00:03:49,379 --> 00:03:51,288 Oh, God, Dad! We know you're dating Carissa 114 00:03:51,306 --> 00:03:53,381 and that's why you're glowing, and we're very happy for you, 115 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:55,125 -and Debbie told Moon about the sensual bath. -Uh, well... Uh... 116 00:03:55,143 --> 00:03:57,069 -Gah! -Judy. -Very cool. 117 00:03:57,220 --> 00:03:59,053 Sorry. Sorry, sorry. I-I-- Pretend I never said that. 118 00:03:59,073 --> 00:04:02,056 Exactly. Dad, we know about your secret girlfriend, 119 00:04:02,076 --> 00:04:03,967 but you don't have to talk about it. 120 00:04:03,986 --> 00:04:06,136 [laughs] Well, funny you should call her that 121 00:04:06,305 --> 00:04:10,490 because she's actually not my girlfriend... yet. 122 00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:13,252 [chuckling] Damn. Okay. We got a player on our hands. 123 00:04:13,403 --> 00:04:16,404 But I'm going to ask Carissa to be my girlfriend 124 00:04:16,498 --> 00:04:19,983 this very night during the Lone Moose Fat Bear meetup. 125 00:04:20,002 --> 00:04:22,076 And the player plays his hand. 126 00:04:22,096 --> 00:04:23,428 She's serving coffee 127 00:04:23,655 --> 00:04:25,597 at the Axel Cream, Donut King food truck at the event, 128 00:04:25,749 --> 00:04:28,492 so I'm gonna pull her aside and pop the question. 129 00:04:28,585 --> 00:04:30,602 [Wolf] Man, I wish I had more time to organize a flash mob. 130 00:04:30,754 --> 00:04:33,013 [Beef] I don't think that'll be necessary, Wolf. 131 00:04:33,165 --> 00:04:35,590 I'll just ask Carissa to be my girlfriend 132 00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:38,110 and then... [chuckling] I don't know, probably kiss her. 133 00:04:38,337 --> 00:04:42,447 [groans] Hello, Child Services? Do you offer curbside pickups? 134 00:04:42,599 --> 00:04:45,450 Ham. Ham. You'll never believe what I just saw. 135 00:04:45,677 --> 00:04:48,269 Oh, no, was it the film A Walk to Remember? 136 00:04:48,289 --> 00:04:50,271 -It really rocked me, too. -No. 137 00:04:50,365 --> 00:04:53,608 It was two women kissing. In the middle of town. 138 00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,961 -Uh... -And I'm not talking a little peck on the cheek. 139 00:04:56,188 --> 00:04:57,278 It looked like one of 'em was trying to take 140 00:04:57,372 --> 00:04:59,523 the other one's tonsils out with her tongue. 141 00:04:59,541 --> 00:05:01,374 So, what's the big deal? That's very common now. 142 00:05:01,527 --> 00:05:03,168 Well, it's one thing to hear that 143 00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:04,636 and another to see it out in the open. 144 00:05:04,863 --> 00:05:08,214 Back in my day, we had to be secretive about everything. 145 00:05:08,367 --> 00:05:10,033 You'd catch eyes across a room, 146 00:05:10,126 --> 00:05:12,811 hurry outside to do stuff by a dumpster, 147 00:05:12,962 --> 00:05:14,295 and then pretend it never happened. 148 00:05:14,464 --> 00:05:16,039 Well, times changed while you were down in your bunker 149 00:05:16,132 --> 00:05:17,131 for 60 years. 150 00:05:17,300 --> 00:05:19,059 We can be gay in public now. 151 00:05:19,227 --> 00:05:21,636 There are even gay parades, gay ski weeks, 152 00:05:21,730 --> 00:05:22,821 the two gays turtles at the zoo, 153 00:05:23,048 --> 00:05:24,489 Sheldon and Terry, gay bars-- 154 00:05:24,641 --> 00:05:27,308 Shut up and say that again. There are gay bars here? 155 00:05:27,328 --> 00:05:30,236 Are they traps? Did you mean gays behind bars? 156 00:05:30,389 --> 00:05:33,147 No... Well, I mean, the gay turtles at the zoo 157 00:05:33,241 --> 00:05:35,334 are technically behind bars, but they seem happy. 158 00:05:35,485 --> 00:05:38,152 Okay, well, as my only known gay relative, 159 00:05:38,172 --> 00:05:39,487 I'm relying on you to... 160 00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:41,915 to, uh, take me to one of these, uh... places. 161 00:05:42,067 --> 00:05:44,158 I can't go to a bar, Aunt Dirt. 162 00:05:44,236 --> 00:05:46,736 I'm underage and I don't have a fake I.D. 163 00:05:46,830 --> 00:05:48,922 Oh, please, Moon and I turn your room for contraband 164 00:05:49,074 --> 00:05:50,015 once a week. 165 00:05:50,166 --> 00:05:51,908 You got a fake I.D., Ham. 166 00:05:51,927 --> 00:05:53,501 Or should I say, "Timberger Kribbins"? 167 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:55,579 Okay, you know what? It was supposed to say, 168 00:05:55,597 --> 00:05:58,098 "Timothy Coolman," but the guy under the docks who makes them 169 00:05:58,266 --> 00:06:00,600 -is a little hard of hearing. -Figure out where we should go 170 00:06:00,752 --> 00:06:03,253 and be ready to drive my sweet ass there tomorrow. 171 00:06:03,271 --> 00:06:04,512 Um, okay. 172 00:06:04,606 --> 00:06:07,682 And I got about 60 years of gay backed up in here, 173 00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:10,202 so expect a late night. 174 00:06:11,187 --> 00:06:12,746 Santiago, what you want to do 175 00:06:12,897 --> 00:06:14,114 is put a dime on the 'dog. 176 00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:15,540 [Santiago] I thought they were bears? 177 00:06:15,767 --> 00:06:19,102 I mean the underdog. This long shot is a sure thing. 178 00:06:19,121 --> 00:06:20,286 Look, I shouldn't even be telling you this, 179 00:06:20,439 --> 00:06:22,122 but just give me 20 bucks and I'll give you 180 00:06:22,274 --> 00:06:24,049 -double or nothing. -Try to make it double. 181 00:06:24,276 --> 00:06:26,459 The Kid's off to a bit of a slow start this year, huh, Beef? 182 00:06:26,612 --> 00:06:28,887 [Beef] Eh, he's just napping confidently 'cause he knows 183 00:06:29,038 --> 00:06:30,296 he'll make up for it later. 184 00:06:30,391 --> 00:06:32,616 -He's The Kid. -Oh, and there's The Hunk. 185 00:06:32,634 --> 00:06:34,226 [Walt] Huh, he's getting a little too close 186 00:06:34,395 --> 00:06:36,469 to The Kid's fishing spot for my taste. 187 00:06:36,622 --> 00:06:39,639 Yeah, he's in big trouble when The Kid wakes up. 188 00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:40,957 Here she comes. 189 00:06:40,976 --> 00:06:43,735 The future Mrs. My Dad's Girlfriend. 190 00:06:43,887 --> 00:06:45,052 [Honeybee] Oh. 191 00:06:45,147 --> 00:06:47,147 -And who's that? -[laughter] 192 00:06:47,241 --> 00:06:48,723 [Beef] Oh, no. He's so... 193 00:06:48,817 --> 00:06:50,575 Stunning? Woof. 194 00:06:50,802 --> 00:06:53,394 Donut King? More like Duke of Doing it for Me, am I right? 195 00:06:53,488 --> 00:06:57,332 Normally this is where I'd say "Wolf," but you're not wrong. 196 00:07:01,738 --> 00:07:02,904 Hey. What's up, weirdo? 197 00:07:02,998 --> 00:07:04,906 Oh. Uh, hello, Carissa. 198 00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:06,149 Beef, this is Axel. 199 00:07:06,168 --> 00:07:07,817 The doughnut guy I'm working with all week? 200 00:07:07,911 --> 00:07:09,152 What up, man? 201 00:07:09,245 --> 00:07:11,988 [clears throat] Hello. You must be Axel. 202 00:07:12,007 --> 00:07:13,915 Yep, that's what I just said. 203 00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:15,917 Okay, somebody get me a beer, please. 204 00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:17,585 -I got ya. -I got-- Oh. 205 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:21,164 Oh, wait, Redbeard, avast me hearty, what will you drink? 206 00:07:21,257 --> 00:07:22,515 -[laughs] -Well, I'll-- 207 00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:25,001 -I'll just get you a beer. Argh. -[laughs] 208 00:07:25,020 --> 00:07:26,611 Axel does voices for all the doughnuts. 209 00:07:26,763 --> 00:07:28,262 The jelly-filleds are British. 210 00:07:28,356 --> 00:07:30,949 [British accent] That's a jelly good doughnut, ol' chap. 211 00:07:31,176 --> 00:07:32,859 Ha. Ha! Funny! 212 00:07:33,028 --> 00:07:37,013 So, Beef, uh, your text said you wanted to run something by me? 213 00:07:37,032 --> 00:07:39,332 Oh, yes. Maybe we could step... 214 00:07:40,109 --> 00:07:41,868 ...fingers. 215 00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:43,203 -Step fingers? -[regular accent] Hey. 216 00:07:43,355 --> 00:07:44,946 Cheers to a great day, Carissa. 217 00:07:44,965 --> 00:07:46,356 We make such a good team. 218 00:07:46,374 --> 00:07:49,209 Oh, sorry, man. Were you, uh, saying something? 219 00:07:49,285 --> 00:07:50,877 Yeah. He was gonna ask me something. 220 00:07:51,029 --> 00:07:53,546 Oh, I was... not. 221 00:07:53,699 --> 00:07:55,048 Beef, are you okay? 222 00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:57,701 Me? Yeah. Yes. 223 00:07:57,719 --> 00:08:00,962 But now I, uh-- Now, I unfortunately have to go. 224 00:08:01,056 --> 00:08:02,388 -Now? -Yes, now. 225 00:08:02,541 --> 00:08:04,966 Uh, goodbye to you. [chuckles] 226 00:08:04,985 --> 00:08:07,043 Okay. Bye. 227 00:08:07,212 --> 00:08:08,394 [Beef] Come on, Kid. 228 00:08:08,547 --> 00:08:10,730 You can't just let the new guy have your fish. 229 00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:12,716 Ugh, I can't watch. 230 00:08:12,734 --> 00:08:14,159 "Axel Cream, Donut King." 231 00:08:15,220 --> 00:08:18,830 Holy Helen Mirren. Who is this guy? 232 00:08:19,057 --> 00:08:20,332 [grunts] 233 00:08:22,060 --> 00:08:24,252 [grunting] 234 00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:28,340 [gasps] Axel? Carissa? 235 00:08:28,567 --> 00:08:29,566 Ignore him, Axel. 236 00:08:29,659 --> 00:08:31,009 He's just some boring non-doughnut man 237 00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:32,344 I used to bathe with. 238 00:08:32,571 --> 00:08:35,588 But I don't want to bathe, I want to dunk. 239 00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:37,924 Oh, Axel. 240 00:08:38,076 --> 00:08:39,851 -[gasps] -[Axel] Ah... Oh... 241 00:08:40,003 --> 00:08:41,911 [Carissa] Now That's What I Call Music! 242 00:08:42,005 --> 00:08:44,022 [screams] 243 00:08:44,249 --> 00:08:46,599 Come on, Kid. You got to get up. 244 00:08:46,752 --> 00:08:48,009 You got to eat something. 245 00:08:48,177 --> 00:08:51,012 There he is. Alaska's Next Top Dad-el. [chuckles] 246 00:08:51,106 --> 00:08:52,513 Uh, yikes. 247 00:08:52,533 --> 00:08:54,591 -What's, uh, what's up, Papa? -Nothing's up. 248 00:08:54,684 --> 00:08:57,110 Beef, are you still upset because Carissa was hanging out 249 00:08:57,262 --> 00:08:58,686 with that doughnut guy yesterday? 250 00:08:58,855 --> 00:09:00,280 Is that why you didn't ask her to be your girlfriend, 251 00:09:00,432 --> 00:09:01,990 and why you refused to talk to anyone 252 00:09:02,100 --> 00:09:03,283 the whole way home in the car? 253 00:09:03,435 --> 00:09:06,861 No, that gorgeous jerk didn't upset me at all. 254 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:08,046 He has nothing to do with why 255 00:09:08,273 --> 00:09:10,215 I didn't ask Carissa to be my girlfriend. 256 00:09:10,366 --> 00:09:14,110 And I didn't dream about him, that's a damn lie. 257 00:09:14,129 --> 00:09:17,113 Beef, hon, Carissa likes you, she's dating you. 258 00:09:17,132 --> 00:09:18,965 Sure, that Axel's a New York ten-- 259 00:09:19,117 --> 00:09:20,892 aka a Lone Moose 85-- 260 00:09:21,044 --> 00:09:22,786 -Not helping, hon. -Copy that. 261 00:09:22,879 --> 00:09:25,972 But Dad, the only way to put this irrational fear behind you 262 00:09:26,141 --> 00:09:28,233 is to rip off that sticky love Band-Aid 263 00:09:28,460 --> 00:09:30,126 and tell Carissa how you feel. 264 00:09:30,145 --> 00:09:31,795 Or I could fight him. 265 00:09:31,813 --> 00:09:34,847 No, Beef, Wolf's right. You're spinning out. 266 00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:36,149 Just talk to Carissa, 267 00:09:36,301 --> 00:09:38,076 -you'll feel better. -Maybe you're right. 268 00:09:38,227 --> 00:09:40,227 I'll try again at the VFW tonight. 269 00:09:40,247 --> 00:09:43,022 I'll-I'll, I'll talk to her. With words. 270 00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,899 Okay, but also, brush your hair. 271 00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:46,810 Right. Right. 272 00:09:46,828 --> 00:09:48,978 [exhales] Okay. 273 00:09:48,997 --> 00:09:50,146 Axel's not a threat. 274 00:09:50,239 --> 00:09:52,740 Just gonna go talk to her with words. 275 00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,075 [laughter] 276 00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:55,576 They're just laughing. No big deal. 277 00:09:55,596 --> 00:09:57,745 People who aren't having sex with each other 278 00:09:57,839 --> 00:09:58,838 often share a laugh. 279 00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:00,599 Look at the Golden Girls. 280 00:10:01,843 --> 00:10:03,493 Dear God. 281 00:10:03,511 --> 00:10:04,510 [laughs] 282 00:10:04,663 --> 00:10:05,845 -Oh, my God! [laughs] -[Beef] No. No. 283 00:10:05,997 --> 00:10:08,773 -No! -Beef. Beef? 284 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:10,850 -What in the world? -[Beef moans] 285 00:10:11,019 --> 00:10:12,760 Hey, there, Beef. You taking off already? 286 00:10:12,854 --> 00:10:14,779 Uh, yeah, I left the iron on, 287 00:10:15,006 --> 00:10:17,115 and-and my stove also on. 288 00:10:17,266 --> 00:10:19,025 I'm extremely sick 289 00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:21,194 and my cat is sick, so I got to go. 290 00:10:21,346 --> 00:10:23,346 Just as well, our boy is not looking good. 291 00:10:23,365 --> 00:10:26,107 The Hunk took his fishing spot right out from under him. 292 00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:28,126 -The Kid just wandered off. -[Beef] Is that so? 293 00:10:28,353 --> 00:10:30,019 Maybe I'll switch over and root for this new guy. 294 00:10:30,038 --> 00:10:32,872 -He is kind of impressive. -No, he isn't. 295 00:10:33,024 --> 00:10:34,190 He's just new, and handsome. 296 00:10:34,283 --> 00:10:35,375 And his jokes aren't funny 297 00:10:35,469 --> 00:10:37,527 and he hasn't been hit by a single train 298 00:10:37,545 --> 00:10:39,954 and his British doughnut accent isn't even authentic. 299 00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:41,306 That bear does accents? 300 00:10:41,457 --> 00:10:43,475 Huh. Maybe I should have bet on him. 301 00:10:43,702 --> 00:10:46,811 Thanks again for offering to bring this old fruit bucket 302 00:10:47,038 --> 00:10:48,313 back to the supermarket, Ham. 303 00:10:48,464 --> 00:10:50,297 I did not offer, but it is my pleasure. 304 00:10:50,392 --> 00:10:52,041 And if this place doesn't toot your horn, 305 00:10:52,135 --> 00:10:53,801 hey, we can go toot elsewhere. 306 00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:55,061 I can't wait to get in there 307 00:10:55,213 --> 00:10:57,322 and fill my cart with gal-ceries, 308 00:10:57,399 --> 00:11:00,049 and I will not be respecting the ten-item limit. 309 00:11:00,143 --> 00:11:01,642 -[dance music playing loudly] -Ah! 310 00:11:01,736 --> 00:11:04,145 The music is gonna blow my head speakers. 311 00:11:04,239 --> 00:11:06,239 I was hoping to get a grope, not a stroke. 312 00:11:06,391 --> 00:11:08,241 Sorry, I guess it is a little overwhelming. 313 00:11:08,393 --> 00:11:10,168 What? No, more like underwhelming. 314 00:11:10,319 --> 00:11:12,837 In the words of my new favorite singer Shania Twain, 315 00:11:12,989 --> 00:11:14,247 "This don't impress me much." 316 00:11:14,416 --> 00:11:18,009 Okay, on to the next. I'm happy to be your gay escort. 317 00:11:18,161 --> 00:11:20,011 Uh, that... that didn't sound right, 318 00:11:20,163 --> 00:11:22,180 but you catch my drift. Anyway... Okay, let's go. 319 00:11:22,331 --> 00:11:24,757 -[muffled music playing] -I'm underdressed 320 00:11:24,910 --> 00:11:27,477 and underwhelmed. Onward. 321 00:11:29,264 --> 00:11:31,764 Edgar Allen No thank you. 322 00:11:31,917 --> 00:11:33,692 Lucky Lass? 323 00:11:33,919 --> 00:11:35,527 More like "long line kiss my ass." 324 00:11:35,754 --> 00:11:36,753 Let's go. 325 00:11:36,846 --> 00:11:38,438 [Wolf] There he is. 326 00:11:38,532 --> 00:11:41,090 You scooted off from the VFW earlier without saying goodbye, 327 00:11:41,184 --> 00:11:43,259 so I just wanted to make sure everything was okay. 328 00:11:43,278 --> 00:11:45,186 It's great. Perfect, actually. 329 00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:47,447 Oh, good. [stammers] And things with Carissa? 330 00:11:47,599 --> 00:11:50,450 Oh, her? Yeah, I'm thinking maybe it was a good thing 331 00:11:50,544 --> 00:11:52,952 I didn't ask her to be my girlfriend yet. 332 00:11:53,029 --> 00:11:54,287 Yeah. Uh, why? 333 00:11:54,456 --> 00:11:57,790 I mean, she's so busy with her coffee and Axel. 334 00:11:57,867 --> 00:11:59,292 Wh... Uh, what's in the backpack? 335 00:11:59,386 --> 00:12:01,219 [gasps] Are you planning to run away? 336 00:12:01,446 --> 00:12:04,130 In the style of Gertrude Warner's The Boxcar Children? 337 00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:05,965 The rails will eat you alive. 338 00:12:06,134 --> 00:12:09,060 No, son, I'm... I'm going to scare that new, 339 00:12:09,212 --> 00:12:11,730 out of town bear off The Kid's fishing rock. 340 00:12:11,881 --> 00:12:13,456 What? Dad, you always told us, 341 00:12:13,549 --> 00:12:15,475 "If you see a bear, leave him there." 342 00:12:15,569 --> 00:12:17,718 And now you're gonna do the literal opposite of that? 343 00:12:17,738 --> 00:12:19,386 Someone has to set things right. 344 00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:22,298 Dad, this is a terrible plan. You could die. 345 00:12:22,391 --> 00:12:24,075 And I feel like you're-you're actually just 346 00:12:24,227 --> 00:12:25,468 upset about Carissa. 347 00:12:25,561 --> 00:12:28,304 Those two things are entirely unrelated. 348 00:12:28,397 --> 00:12:31,157 I'm doing this to defend The Kid's honor. 349 00:12:31,309 --> 00:12:32,825 Well, th... I'm coming with you. 350 00:12:32,978 --> 00:12:34,753 A-And then trying to stop you again. 351 00:12:34,904 --> 00:12:36,237 What's going on here? Wolf, 352 00:12:36,331 --> 00:12:37,497 I thought we were gonna order a pizza 353 00:12:37,649 --> 00:12:39,499 and watch Canada's Creepiest Cousins. 354 00:12:39,593 --> 00:12:41,926 Sorry, babe, but Dad's saying he's gonna go fight a bear 355 00:12:42,153 --> 00:12:43,261 because he's paranoid about Carissa 356 00:12:43,488 --> 00:12:45,913 hanging out with that dreamy Donut King, 357 00:12:45,932 --> 00:12:48,582 so I'm gonna tag along and try to stop him. 358 00:12:48,602 --> 00:12:51,102 Ugh. Men will literally go into an active bear habitat 359 00:12:51,254 --> 00:12:52,345 with a backpack full of fish 360 00:12:52,497 --> 00:12:54,163 before they talk about their feelings. 361 00:12:54,182 --> 00:12:56,682 -Anyway, please don't die. -I promise we won't. 362 00:12:56,835 --> 00:12:59,185 Uh, but if we do, please call in and vote for Darush 363 00:12:59,262 --> 00:13:02,238 to be kicked off this week. He ain't even close to creepy. 364 00:13:06,269 --> 00:13:08,027 Aw, Department of Fish and Wild Fart. 365 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:11,514 The trail's closed. [stammers] Dad? 366 00:13:11,533 --> 00:13:12,773 Uh, wait up. 367 00:13:12,867 --> 00:13:14,108 Okay so, once again, 368 00:13:14,202 --> 00:13:16,185 I just want to say, you know, gently, 369 00:13:16,279 --> 00:13:18,688 uh, that, maybe, you are over-identifying 370 00:13:18,690 --> 00:13:21,374 with The Kid's struggle with this new alpha bear right now 371 00:13:21,526 --> 00:13:23,026 in a way that might, uh, you know, 372 00:13:23,119 --> 00:13:24,377 result in your actual death, so-- 373 00:13:24,529 --> 00:13:27,363 Wolf, I do not identify with The Kid, okay? 374 00:13:27,456 --> 00:13:30,550 Sure, we both spent our whole lives in Lone Moose, 375 00:13:30,644 --> 00:13:32,201 and we both love to fish, 376 00:13:32,220 --> 00:13:35,296 and sure, yes, fine, we have both been hit by two trains. 377 00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:36,981 You've been hit by two trains? 378 00:13:37,208 --> 00:13:39,225 Yes, once by the ride-on-top at the mall, 379 00:13:39,377 --> 00:13:41,653 and once by a small coal freighter when your mother 380 00:13:41,822 --> 00:13:44,638 invented a game called "Choo Choo Smoocharoo." 381 00:13:44,732 --> 00:13:46,157 Well, that sounds fun as hell. 382 00:13:46,384 --> 00:13:48,660 [Beef] Here we go. Switch the bear cameras off. 383 00:13:49,478 --> 00:13:51,979 -Hey, what the hell? -You want to make a wager 384 00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:54,057 on how long this feed is down? 385 00:13:54,075 --> 00:13:55,983 It's either 10-1 or 2-3, your call. 386 00:13:56,077 --> 00:13:57,985 And what's that, Zoya? Jacks are wild? 387 00:13:58,079 --> 00:13:59,671 I said nothing to you. 388 00:13:59,822 --> 00:14:02,156 Now, no one will be the wiser. 389 00:14:02,175 --> 00:14:05,159 And no one will see us die. Hooray... 390 00:14:05,253 --> 00:14:07,420 [dance music playing] 391 00:14:07,572 --> 00:14:10,515 I'm guessing this is not your dream bar, either? 392 00:14:10,742 --> 00:14:13,334 Ugh, maybe I'm too old. I missed my time, 393 00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:16,003 and now I should probably just stick to skin mags 394 00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:17,246 and waiting for death. 395 00:14:17,265 --> 00:14:18,857 I can't let you give up that easy. 396 00:14:19,008 --> 00:14:21,434 I got to get you living your gay life to the fullest. 397 00:14:21,586 --> 00:14:24,103 Eh, it's okay, Ham. Let's just head down to the dock, 398 00:14:24,180 --> 00:14:26,180 so I can throw beer bottles at the seagulls. 399 00:14:26,274 --> 00:14:28,107 Normally, I'd say no, 400 00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:30,535 but I can tell you really need it right now. 401 00:14:30,762 --> 00:14:32,929 [seagulls squawk] 402 00:14:32,947 --> 00:14:35,707 -Hey, Londra. -Oh. Ooh. Hi, Ham. 403 00:14:35,934 --> 00:14:37,934 And you must be Aunt Dirt. 404 00:14:38,027 --> 00:14:39,544 Pipe down, you're spooking the gulls. 405 00:14:39,771 --> 00:14:42,404 Sorry about her. I tried to take her to her first gay bar, 406 00:14:42,406 --> 00:14:44,624 -but nothing struck her fancy. -Or my pants seat. 407 00:14:44,718 --> 00:14:47,443 Been there. The only place I even bother with anymore 408 00:14:47,462 --> 00:14:49,370 is the Wooly Ma'am. It ain't much, 409 00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:51,872 but they have adequate lighting and you can hear yourself think. 410 00:14:51,892 --> 00:14:53,892 -Well, that's checking my box. -Hmm. 411 00:14:54,043 --> 00:14:55,209 How come I didn't see The Wooly Ma'am 412 00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:56,710 listed anywhere online? 413 00:14:56,730 --> 00:14:58,396 Well, 'cause it's a speakeasy. 414 00:14:58,547 --> 00:15:01,065 Also, most of the patrons don't know how to use the Internet. 415 00:15:01,217 --> 00:15:03,217 Tell me where this infamous Wooly Ma'am is 416 00:15:03,294 --> 00:15:05,719 or, so help me God, I will blow up your boat. 417 00:15:05,739 --> 00:15:07,071 No. No, no, no, Dirt. 418 00:15:07,223 --> 00:15:09,390 "I will blow up your boat, please." 419 00:15:09,558 --> 00:15:11,801 I'm just saying, maybe Carissa thinks 420 00:15:11,819 --> 00:15:13,302 this Axel guy's a total clown. 421 00:15:13,471 --> 00:15:15,488 I mean, he's only six-foot-four. [blows raspberry] 422 00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:17,473 This has nothing to do with Carissa. 423 00:15:17,492 --> 00:15:20,977 I'm scaring this new bear off The Kid's territory because... 424 00:15:20,995 --> 00:15:23,312 well, you don't just show up from out of town 425 00:15:23,331 --> 00:15:25,757 and fish at another bear's fishing rock. 426 00:15:25,908 --> 00:15:28,742 Especially a bear who's spent years 427 00:15:28,762 --> 00:15:30,595 thinking about that fishing rock 428 00:15:30,746 --> 00:15:32,263 and was actually hesitant 429 00:15:32,490 --> 00:15:34,824 to even go fishing in the first place 430 00:15:34,842 --> 00:15:36,342 because the last time he did, 431 00:15:36,419 --> 00:15:38,844 he got very, very hurt, and... 432 00:15:38,997 --> 00:15:40,254 -[bear growls] -[gasps] 433 00:15:40,331 --> 00:15:41,439 [Beef] The Hunk. 434 00:15:41,608 --> 00:15:44,667 It's go time. No one takes what belongs to The Kid 435 00:15:44,760 --> 00:15:46,169 without going through me. 436 00:15:46,187 --> 00:15:49,172 Uh... [stammers] Dad, while that did sound extremely cool, 437 00:15:49,265 --> 00:15:51,449 uh, maybe we should think this through and... 438 00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:53,176 -[clanging] -Or just go. That's good, too. 439 00:15:53,269 --> 00:15:56,955 There you go, you stupid, strong idiot. 440 00:15:57,182 --> 00:15:59,031 Just go take someone else's fish 441 00:15:59,184 --> 00:16:01,292 -like you always do. -[growls] 442 00:16:01,444 --> 00:16:02,351 [whoops] 443 00:16:02,445 --> 00:16:04,462 Wolf, did you see that? It worked. 444 00:16:04,613 --> 00:16:06,872 -Dad, he's coming back your way. -[growls] 445 00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:08,115 Dad! 446 00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:10,117 -[growls] -[screams] 447 00:16:10,136 --> 00:16:12,345 Oh, no. It's hunk versus hunk. 448 00:16:16,625 --> 00:16:18,050 [Wolf] Dad, you got to try to save yourself. 449 00:16:18,203 --> 00:16:19,310 -Grab the bear spray! -Uh. Bear spray. 450 00:16:19,537 --> 00:16:21,204 -Ah. Ah! [screams] -[Wolf] Oh, no, no, no! 451 00:16:21,222 --> 00:16:23,630 -[growling] -[screaming] 452 00:16:23,799 --> 00:16:25,466 Dad! No! 453 00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:26,542 [grunts] 454 00:16:26,635 --> 00:16:28,227 I'm coming, Dad. 455 00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:31,472 Online lifeguarding course, don't fail me now. 456 00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:34,975 Get your own damn Dad, log. This one's spoken for. 457 00:16:35,053 --> 00:16:35,976 [screams] 458 00:16:35,996 --> 00:16:38,145 Okay, help me to shore. 459 00:16:38,314 --> 00:16:40,890 I need to get back out there and fight for The Kid. 460 00:16:40,983 --> 00:16:42,333 Are you out of your beautiful mind? 461 00:16:42,485 --> 00:16:45,411 You're not going to win a fight against a 700-pound bear. 462 00:16:45,563 --> 00:16:47,580 Only Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson could, 463 00:16:47,732 --> 00:16:49,415 and he did in that movie Bear Fight, 464 00:16:49,567 --> 00:16:53,236 and he humiliated that dumbass bear, but he's the only one. 465 00:16:53,329 --> 00:16:56,255 Right. Fine. Yes. Fine. 466 00:16:56,332 --> 00:16:59,091 We're, uh, looking for The Wooly Ma'am. 467 00:16:59,185 --> 00:17:00,926 -Password? -Lesbian. 468 00:17:01,079 --> 00:17:04,397 Eh, close enough. Through that dressing room. 469 00:17:07,009 --> 00:17:08,026 [Dirt] Whoa. 470 00:17:08,177 --> 00:17:10,194 Dirt, do you... like it? 471 00:17:10,421 --> 00:17:12,255 [Dirt] You know, it's not so... 472 00:17:12,273 --> 00:17:13,756 Hi, there, new face. I'm Denise. 473 00:17:13,775 --> 00:17:14,924 And I'm... 474 00:17:15,017 --> 00:17:16,200 Oh, God. Oh, crap. 475 00:17:16,352 --> 00:17:18,703 Room spinning. I'm out of here! 476 00:17:18,854 --> 00:17:20,780 [both panting] 477 00:17:20,932 --> 00:17:22,040 Wolf, I... 478 00:17:22,267 --> 00:17:24,691 I can't believe I did that. And for what? 479 00:17:24,769 --> 00:17:28,604 To avoid possibly, maybe getting my heart broken again? 480 00:17:28,697 --> 00:17:31,698 Yeah. We all do crazy things when we're in love. I mean... 481 00:17:31,718 --> 00:17:33,217 [stammers] ...not like this. 482 00:17:33,369 --> 00:17:34,701 I don't want you to think this was in any way normal. 483 00:17:34,796 --> 00:17:37,871 Right. I tried to fight a bear. 484 00:17:37,965 --> 00:17:39,373 What was I thinking? I mean... 485 00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:42,118 I got to accept that guys are gonna like Carissa. 486 00:17:42,136 --> 00:17:43,394 She's very fun. 487 00:17:43,621 --> 00:17:45,621 I mean, she can bong, like, three beers in a minute. 488 00:17:45,714 --> 00:17:49,049 I get it, though. I mean, there were tons of other Shreks, 489 00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:50,476 Donkeys, and sexy Gingerbread Men 490 00:17:50,628 --> 00:17:52,978 writing to Honeybee on the movie quote message board 491 00:17:53,131 --> 00:17:54,146 when we first met. 492 00:17:54,299 --> 00:17:56,056 Yeah? Well, how did you handle it? 493 00:17:56,076 --> 00:17:58,242 Well, all I could do was shoot my shot, 494 00:17:58,469 --> 00:18:01,395 be myself, and hope the onion peeled in my favor. 495 00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:03,489 Look, dating's a gamble, and your heart's the... 496 00:18:03,566 --> 00:18:05,474 the little, you know, gambling circle 497 00:18:05,493 --> 00:18:08,144 that I-I want to say they call a... [stammers] 498 00:18:08,162 --> 00:18:11,071 ...a betting cracker? Or, no. Uh, a wager wafer? 499 00:18:11,165 --> 00:18:13,149 I think I drowned my poker knowledge in the creek. 500 00:18:13,242 --> 00:18:15,835 Anyway, overall, it's a bet worth taking. 501 00:18:15,929 --> 00:18:17,595 I'm afraid you might be right, son. 502 00:18:17,822 --> 00:18:21,099 [grunts] I'm gonna take this path back into town 503 00:18:21,250 --> 00:18:24,751 and go knock on Carissa's door and tell her how I feel. 504 00:18:24,846 --> 00:18:26,229 [Wolf] Hell yeah. 505 00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:28,497 None the wiser. 506 00:18:28,516 --> 00:18:29,923 All right. 507 00:18:30,017 --> 00:18:31,592 Now really what the hell? 508 00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,611 Is that Beef? 509 00:18:33,838 --> 00:18:34,854 Aunt Dirt? 510 00:18:34,948 --> 00:18:36,114 [Dirt] Aunt Dirt is not here right now. 511 00:18:36,265 --> 00:18:37,556 This is the skirts talking. 512 00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:40,192 You, uh, you want to tell us what happened? 513 00:18:40,345 --> 00:18:42,027 I thought if I found the right bar, 514 00:18:42,180 --> 00:18:44,180 I'd be flirtier than a Pan Am flight attendant, 515 00:18:44,273 --> 00:18:46,182 but I don't need a change of scene, 516 00:18:46,351 --> 00:18:47,350 I need a change of Dirt. 517 00:18:47,443 --> 00:18:50,202 I'm so freaked out about just being me, 518 00:18:50,355 --> 00:18:51,520 out in the open. 519 00:18:51,689 --> 00:18:54,039 I'm still most comfortable in a small, dark room, 520 00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:54,966 where no one can see me. 521 00:18:55,193 --> 00:18:56,968 Almost like a... closet? 522 00:18:57,195 --> 00:18:58,803 No, you bigot, like a bunker. 523 00:18:59,030 --> 00:19:00,212 Like the one I lived in for 60 years. 524 00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:02,140 For what it's worth, being terrified 525 00:19:02,175 --> 00:19:04,383 is par for the course, Dirt. At least at the beginning. 526 00:19:04,552 --> 00:19:07,645 Uh-huh? Really? But, Ham, you're so out 527 00:19:07,796 --> 00:19:09,814 and, I want to say, proud. 528 00:19:09,965 --> 00:19:12,041 Sure am. But it takes some work. 529 00:19:12,059 --> 00:19:14,426 So, you can live in a skirt rack forever, I guess, 530 00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:17,989 but I think you want more than just a bunker full of nudie mags 531 00:19:18,140 --> 00:19:20,733 and some occasional dumpster diving for love. 532 00:19:20,885 --> 00:19:22,401 Yeah. I do want more. 533 00:19:22,553 --> 00:19:24,904 [Ham] Well, then, let's get you out from under these skirts 534 00:19:25,056 --> 00:19:27,123 and into someone else's. 535 00:19:28,484 --> 00:19:31,652 Hello, again. Very sorry I ran off earlier. 536 00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:33,153 It's okay. Took me five tries 537 00:19:33,247 --> 00:19:34,488 before I could even order a drink in this place. 538 00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:36,323 -What's your name, darling? -I'm Dirtrude. 539 00:19:36,342 --> 00:19:38,325 I recently lived underground in a bunker 540 00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:40,236 for 60 years, where I ate only beans 541 00:19:40,254 --> 00:19:42,405 and drank only my own purified urine. 542 00:19:42,498 --> 00:19:45,516 I enjoy civil liberties, throwing bottles at seagulls, 543 00:19:45,626 --> 00:19:47,076 and a sturdy gin gimlet. 544 00:19:47,078 --> 00:19:48,761 Hey, three for three. 545 00:19:48,855 --> 00:19:50,003 Well, then, in the words of 546 00:19:50,097 --> 00:19:51,747 my new favorite singer, Shania Twain, 547 00:19:51,766 --> 00:19:53,524 "Honey, I'm home." 548 00:19:54,527 --> 00:19:55,751 [doorbell rings] 549 00:19:55,770 --> 00:19:56,861 Beef? 550 00:19:57,012 --> 00:19:59,179 Carissa, I'm sorry. I have cheated. 551 00:19:59,273 --> 00:20:00,940 -What? You did? -Oh, no. 552 00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:03,016 No, no, not like that. What I mean is, 553 00:20:03,185 --> 00:20:04,944 I cheated at Fat Bear Week. 554 00:20:05,096 --> 00:20:07,371 Or I-I tried to cheat. [chuckles] 555 00:20:07,523 --> 00:20:10,099 -But then was attacked by a bear. -Beef! 556 00:20:10,192 --> 00:20:12,210 [sighs] I was feeling threatened 557 00:20:12,437 --> 00:20:15,046 by your very attractive colleague, Axel Cream, 558 00:20:15,197 --> 00:20:16,939 and I chose to dump my feelings 559 00:20:16,958 --> 00:20:20,867 onto a handsome, young, virile out-of-town brown bear. 560 00:20:20,962 --> 00:20:22,445 This makes no sense. Continue. 561 00:20:22,538 --> 00:20:26,057 And I tried to fight that bear, and he did almost kill me, 562 00:20:26,284 --> 00:20:29,876 but I think what I really want to say is just... 563 00:20:29,971 --> 00:20:32,563 [sighs] Will you be my girlfriend? 564 00:20:32,790 --> 00:20:34,139 Yes. 565 00:20:34,234 --> 00:20:37,126 Also, Beef, you do not have to worry about Axel. 566 00:20:37,144 --> 00:20:39,645 -I don't? -No, he's not my type. 567 00:20:39,797 --> 00:20:41,072 I only like big hairy idiots 568 00:20:41,299 --> 00:20:43,299 who try to fight actual bears for me. 569 00:20:43,317 --> 00:20:45,150 [Diondra over TV] In a final weigh-in shocker, 570 00:20:45,319 --> 00:20:47,411 The Kid took his 12th Fat Bear victory. 571 00:20:47,563 --> 00:20:49,972 Making The Hunk look like a punk. 572 00:20:50,065 --> 00:20:51,398 Looks like The Kid's still got it. 573 00:20:51,417 --> 00:20:53,734 [laughs] Yeah, and I'm about to get it. 574 00:20:53,828 --> 00:20:55,086 -[laughs] -[Moon] Hey, Dad? 575 00:20:55,237 --> 00:20:56,778 -Have you seen my-- -[Beef and Carissa scream] 576 00:20:56,905 --> 00:20:59,148 [screams] 577 00:20:59,166 --> 00:21:00,499 ♪ A man walks down the street ♪ 578 00:21:00,668 --> 00:21:02,334 ♪ It's a street in a strange world ♪ 579 00:21:02,487 --> 00:21:04,153 ♪ Maybe it's the third world ♪ 580 00:21:04,171 --> 00:21:05,838 ♪ Maybe it's his first time around ♪ 581 00:21:05,932 --> 00:21:07,748 ♪ Doesn't speak the language ♪ 582 00:21:07,767 --> 00:21:09,100 ♪ He holds no currency ♪ 583 00:21:09,251 --> 00:21:10,509 ♪ He is a foreign man ♪ 584 00:21:10,661 --> 00:21:12,995 ♪ He is surrounded by the sound ♪ 585 00:21:12,997 --> 00:21:14,105 ♪ The sound ♪ 586 00:21:14,332 --> 00:21:15,514 ♪ Spinning in infinity ♪ 587 00:21:15,608 --> 00:21:17,166 ♪ He says, "Amen and hallelujah" ♪ 588 00:21:17,335 --> 00:21:19,001 ♪ If you'll be my bodyguard ♪ 589 00:21:19,020 --> 00:21:21,928 ♪ I can be your long-lost pal ♪ 590 00:21:21,948 --> 00:21:23,781 [vocalizing] 591 00:21:24,008 --> 00:21:25,357 ♪ I can call you Betty ♪ 592 00:21:25,510 --> 00:21:27,118 ♪ Betty, when you call me ♪ 593 00:21:27,345 --> 00:21:30,195 ♪ You can call me Al, call me Al. ♪ 594 00:21:30,348 --> 00:21:31,347 Captioning sponsored by BENTO BOX ENTERTAINMENT 595 00:21:31,365 --> 00:21:32,790 and TOYOTA. 596 00:21:33,017 --> 00:21:34,458 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org