1
00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:10,160
‐ Whoa, hey. Oh, what is that thing?

2
00:00:10,150 --> 00:00:11,900
Oh, don't throw that out.
I can sell that on eBay.

3
00:00:11,900 --> 00:00:14,150
‐ It has an unstable gray hole inside.

4
00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:15,620
‐ You're an unstable gray hole.

5
00:00:15,620 --> 00:00:17,200
JESSE: Nice. [snickers]
‐ It's too big for the trash.

6
00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:18,870
I'm gonna dump it behind the Burger King.

7
00:00:18,870 --> 00:00:21,540
‐ Don't, no, I can sell it
and then buy a chocolate fountain

8
00:00:21,540 --> 00:00:23,250
so I can stop making
a mess in the microwave

9
00:00:23,250 --> 00:00:24,500
and you won't have
to yell at me anymore!

10
00:00:24,500 --> 00:00:26,840
‐ Look at the Pupa. I told you
to stop giving the Pupa candy.

11
00:00:26,830 --> 00:00:28,160
He can't eat candy, it gets him sick!

12
00:00:28,170 --> 00:00:29,720
‐ I didn't‐‐ I don't give him
candy anymore.

13
00:00:29,710 --> 00:00:30,710
‐ Well, he's getting it from someone!

14
00:00:31,710 --> 00:00:32,960
‐ Oh great, now what.

15
00:00:34,680 --> 00:00:37,470
The homeowners association
is updating the rules again.

16
00:00:37,470 --> 00:00:39,520
"Gardeners need to have marked trucks.

17
00:00:39,510 --> 00:00:41,470
"No RV parking in the driveway.

18
00:00:41,470 --> 00:00:45,060
All spaceships sticking out of houses
need to be painted to match the trim."

19
00:00:45,060 --> 00:00:46,930
Are you hearing this?
‐ Ooh, we should totally get an RV.

20
00:00:46,940 --> 00:00:50,070
‐ It looks fine the way it is.
I don't want it to blend into the house.

21
00:00:50,070 --> 00:00:52,280
It's my whole thing,
I'm the spaceship guy!

22
00:00:52,900 --> 00:00:55,190
Damn it! There's a gray hole, Terry!
A gray hole in the house!

23
00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:58,330
'Cause we could just live in an RV.

24
00:01:00,370 --> 00:01:02,960
You know, Terry, this proves that
everyone in the neighborhood hates us.

25
00:01:05,870 --> 00:01:08,450
I mean, why do you think
everybody gives me more room
when I'm walking down the street?

26
00:01:08,460 --> 00:01:10,130
‐ They're avoiding us!
‐ They love us.

27
00:01:10,130 --> 00:01:12,840
‐ I think there's only one way
to find out who's right.

28
00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:13,970
Nanobots.
‐ Buy an RV.

29
00:01:13,970 --> 00:01:14,800
Nan‐‐ Nanobots.

30
00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:17,920
KORVO:
Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia.

31
00:01:18,300 --> 00:01:20,170
Until the asteroid hit.

32
00:01:21,100 --> 00:01:23,520
One hundred adults and their replicants
were issued a Pupa

33
00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:25,480
and escaped into, uh, the space,

34
00:01:28,610 --> 00:01:31,570
We crashed on Earth, stranding us
on an already overpopulated planet.

35
00:01:31,570 --> 00:01:33,320
That's right,
I've been talking this whole time.

36
00:01:33,320 --> 00:01:35,030
I'm the one holding the Pupa.
My name's Korvo.

37
00:01:35,030 --> 00:01:37,530
This is‐‐ this is my show.
I just dropped the Pupa. Do you see me?

38
00:01:37,530 --> 00:01:38,910
[stammers]
This is ridiculous.

39
00:01:38,910 --> 00:01:40,870
I hate Earth. It's a horrible home.

40
00:01:40,870 --> 00:01:41,870
People are stupid.

41
00:01:41,870 --> 00:01:44,420
I don't understand why people
have so many outfit choices

42
00:01:44,410 --> 00:01:46,450
when you could just wear
a thick, coarse robe.

43
00:01:46,460 --> 00:01:48,800
It's the perfect garment.
Boots and a robe. Easy.

44
00:01:57,930 --> 00:02:00,310
‐ Whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought you
weren't shrinking kids down anymore?

45
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:06,150
a lady who had 15 items
in the 12‐item lane,

46
00:02:06,140 --> 00:02:08,350
and a guy who pronounces schedule
like "shed‐jewel."

47
00:02:08,350 --> 00:02:10,680
‐ That's not wall worthy,
that's you being a jerk.

48
00:02:12,570 --> 00:02:14,530
[people screaming]

49
00:02:14,530 --> 00:02:15,990
Ha ha ha, look at 'em.

50
00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:20,610
YUMYULACK:
Hey, little guy!

51
00:02:22,990 --> 00:02:24,780
‐ [laser pulsing]
‐ [alarm ringing]

52
00:02:25,330 --> 00:02:28,000
‐ That's the alarm! Lucky for you, I've
been teaching myself to hack at night

53
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,710
while you've been wasting
your time sleeping.

54
00:02:29,710 --> 00:02:31,630
‐ Alexa, turn off alarm.

55
00:02:31,630 --> 00:02:32,800
[alarm stops]
ALEXA: Alarm deactivated.

56
00:02:32,790 --> 00:02:34,370
‐ Stupid Alexa. Always listening.

57
00:02:34,380 --> 00:02:35,550
‐ Hold it right there! I'm armed!

58
00:02:35,550 --> 00:02:36,930
‐ Lethal force!
Zap him with the bone zapper.

59
00:02:36,920 --> 00:02:38,250
[laser zaps]
‐ Crap, now it's out of charge!

60
00:02:38,260 --> 00:02:39,560
‐ Bite down on your poison teeth!

61
00:02:39,550 --> 00:02:40,550
‐ Terry?

62
00:02:40,550 --> 00:02:41,760
‐ Gordon?
[spits]

63
00:02:41,760 --> 00:02:42,970
Wait, you‐you work here?

64
00:02:42,970 --> 00:02:44,720
‐ Yup, yeah, man, it's my third job.

65
00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:46,340
I got three jobs, one, two, three.

66
00:02:46,350 --> 00:02:48,190
Got the three banger jobs, you know.
‐ Oh, man, well, that's good news.

67
00:02:53,310 --> 00:02:55,390
in the town water supply so we can
find out if people like us.

68
00:02:56,940 --> 00:03:00,440
Everyone will unknowingly drink water
contaminated with our nanobots,

69
00:03:00,450 --> 00:03:01,990
which will harvest all their memories,

70
00:03:01,990 --> 00:03:04,200
and then they'll pee them out
and they'll end up back here.

71
00:03:06,700 --> 00:03:08,070
Hey, the room with
the big pool of water

72
00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:09,420
that everyone drinks from
is right over here.

73
00:03:09,410 --> 00:03:11,030
Come on.
‐ How do you, uh, know this guy?

74
00:03:11,040 --> 00:03:12,000
‐ He sold me a gun.

75
00:03:13,840 --> 00:03:16,220
‐ Be sure to break up the clumps
or they might become sentient.

76
00:03:16,210 --> 00:03:17,540
‐ Hey, man, are you sure
this is gonna work?

77
00:03:17,550 --> 00:03:20,390
‐ Well, it better, each one
of these nanobot cost me 24 cents.

78
00:03:20,380 --> 00:03:21,960
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

79
00:03:31,230 --> 00:03:34,280
♪

80
00:03:36,570 --> 00:03:37,400
I mean, they should reboot them.

81
00:03:39,780 --> 00:03:41,370
‐ We forgot to check the nanobots!

82
00:03:41,360 --> 00:03:42,900
‐ [door opens, closes]
‐ [grunting on TV]

83
00:04:05,970 --> 00:04:07,430
‐ [gasps]
Oww!

84
00:04:13,020 --> 00:04:13,900
Yah!

85
00:04:24,700 --> 00:04:26,120
‐ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold it.

86
00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:28,330
How can you be sure you're gonna get
all of those things out of there?

87
00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:31,160
I'm just kidding, I don't care.

88
00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:33,280
I work at the water treatment plant,
I'm not a cop.

89
00:04:33,290 --> 00:04:36,340
Oh, hey, by the way, I got some heroin.
You guys wanna do heroin?

90
00:04:41,630 --> 00:04:43,590
I can finally reduce people to statistics!

91
00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:48,420
Ooh! This is how much people like us!

92
00:04:48,430 --> 00:04:50,690
What the hell? Trent from
around the block doesn't like

93
00:04:50,680 --> 00:04:52,300
that I let Pupa go number two on his lawn?

94
00:04:52,310 --> 00:04:53,480
Where the heck is he supposed to go?

95
00:04:53,480 --> 00:04:57,030
‐ Brooke and Diane both think I ask
too many questions at the grocery store.

96
00:04:57,020 --> 00:04:58,310
I'm from outer space!

97
00:04:58,310 --> 00:05:00,350
It's not clear to me why you have
to cook bread twice.

98
00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:01,490
‐ [loudly]
Mitchell thinks I'm too loud!

99
00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:05,940
Is it the sci‐fi stuff?
Do I smell bad? What is it?

100
00:05:05,950 --> 00:05:07,660
‐ Looks like people
just generally don't like us!

101
00:05:07,660 --> 00:05:08,830
One guy hates you.

102
00:05:10,410 --> 00:05:12,040
‐ I don't even know anyone named Tyler.

103
00:05:12,040 --> 00:05:13,630
‐ Ugh, it feels like I'm covered in bees!

104
00:05:15,620 --> 00:05:18,080
‐ We‐we‐we can act different, Korvo.
I mean, we can make people like us.

105
00:05:20,090 --> 00:05:22,510
And if people don't like us,
that will make that job

106
00:05:22,510 --> 00:05:24,180
so much harder in so many ways.

107
00:05:24,170 --> 00:05:25,790
So to be clear: I don't need to be liked,

108
00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:26,850
it's strictly a work necessity.

109
00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:28,210
‐ Well, I need to be liked!

110
00:05:28,550 --> 00:05:30,170
‐ Dang it, have you seen
my shrink ray anywhere?

111
00:05:30,180 --> 00:05:31,140
I'm hoping it didn't shrink.

112
00:05:31,140 --> 00:05:32,440
How ironic would that be.

113
00:05:32,430 --> 00:05:33,720
‐ I hid it.
‐ Give it back!

114
00:05:33,730 --> 00:05:36,020
I will, but first I want to prove to you

115
00:05:36,020 --> 00:05:38,780
that humans are mostly
basically good life forms.

116
00:05:38,770 --> 00:05:42,100
For the last couple months, you've been
putting way too many people in the wall.

117
00:05:42,110 --> 00:05:43,490
You need to pump the brakes, mister.

118
00:05:52,910 --> 00:05:55,450
Um, dang it, did you hide my gun
that makes people do what I want?

119
00:05:55,460 --> 00:05:57,170
‐ Yeah, I hid all your guns.

120
00:05:57,170 --> 00:05:59,800
‐ All the blue areas are pockets
where people don't like us

121
00:05:59,790 --> 00:06:00,830
as much as they should.

122
00:06:02,380 --> 00:06:05,050
that marks which houses give out
the biggest candy bars on Halloween.

123
00:06:05,050 --> 00:06:08,310
‐ With a little extra effort, I think
we can up our likability fast.

124
00:06:09,840 --> 00:06:11,130
‐ You mean sex stuff?

125
00:06:11,140 --> 00:06:12,480
‐ It's possible. Yeah.
‐ Then yes.

126
00:06:12,470 --> 00:06:14,380
‐ Then let's aggressively
make people like us!

127
00:06:15,060 --> 00:06:17,310
‐ Shauna, the complete
McNugget buddy collection.

128
00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:19,480
Here you go.
‐ Jeremiah, here's a gold bar.

129
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:20,860
You can put it up your butt.

130
00:06:20,860 --> 00:06:22,280
‐ Carson, it's your son.

131
00:06:22,270 --> 00:06:24,600
He's alive again. There you go. Have fun.

132
00:06:25,400 --> 00:06:26,440
[zapping]

133
00:06:26,440 --> 00:06:27,900
Courtesy of Korvo!

134
00:06:27,900 --> 00:06:30,820
‐ Oh my god, I can feel my legs!

135
00:06:30,820 --> 00:06:32,320
I have legs!

136
00:06:32,330 --> 00:06:34,460
These are kind of hard to control.

137
00:06:38,870 --> 00:06:39,870
Keep moving. You're welcome.

138
00:06:39,870 --> 00:06:40,870
Everybody's welcome.
‐ You're getting there early!

139
00:06:43,380 --> 00:06:45,130
Terry and Korvo.
‐ All right, Terry, that's enough.

140
00:06:45,130 --> 00:06:46,340
L‐L‐let's go.

141
00:06:47,220 --> 00:06:48,970
‐ No, no, no, no, no!
[horn blaring]

142
00:06:57,430 --> 00:07:00,180
‐ He always eats lunch
alone in his office.

143
00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:03,570
‐ Hey! Get outta here.

144
00:07:03,570 --> 00:07:06,110
‐ I had an extra pudding cup
today, Mr. Dutch.

145
00:07:06,110 --> 00:07:07,660
I thought you might want it.

146
00:07:10,450 --> 00:07:12,330
My ex‐wife used to pack my lunch.

147
00:07:12,320 --> 00:07:14,820
Ever since we separated,
I've been doing it on my own.

148
00:07:14,830 --> 00:07:16,710
I'm sorry if I've been
kind of a dick this year.

149
00:07:16,700 --> 00:07:17,740
I've‐‐ I've been going through a lot.

150
00:07:21,790 --> 00:07:25,250
You know what? Neither of you need to run
the mile in next week's fitness test.

151
00:07:25,250 --> 00:07:27,420
I'll just say you both got six minutes.

152
00:07:27,420 --> 00:07:29,590
‐ See? We were nice
to someone who was mean,

153
00:07:29,590 --> 00:07:31,340
and now we don't have
to run the mile.

154
00:07:31,340 --> 00:07:32,750
‐ That's true.
That's how it panned out.

155
00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:35,230
‐ Yeah, that might work on a sad,
old, lonely gym teacher, but‐‐

156
00:07:35,220 --> 00:07:37,680
‐ What about those mean surfer guys
at Fourth Beach?

157
00:07:37,680 --> 00:07:39,970
‐ Ugh, I hate them.
They're always mean to me.

158
00:07:39,980 --> 00:07:44,440
‐ Something tells me that today
might be a little different. Wink.

159
00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:46,650
‐ Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.
Are you seeing this, Terry?

160
00:07:46,650 --> 00:07:48,610
‐ It's working! We're tricking people
into being our friends!

161
00:07:48,610 --> 00:07:50,700
Ah, this feels so good, I feel so whole!

162
00:07:50,700 --> 00:07:51,830
‐ We're popular!

163
00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:54,540
Solar Opposites will be right back
after these set of‐‐

164
00:07:54,530 --> 00:07:56,530
[stammers] this set of
subsequent advertisements.

165
00:07:56,530 --> 00:07:57,570
♪

166
00:08:00,870 --> 00:08:04,120
Unless you spring for expensive Hulu,
then there was no commercial break

167
00:08:04,130 --> 00:08:07,050
and this doesn't make a whole lot of sense
and is probably quite jarring.

168
00:08:07,050 --> 00:08:08,510
Good for you, Mr. Moneybags.

169
00:08:11,130 --> 00:08:12,880
It's laser engraved
right there in the middle, see?

170
00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:15,210
How's that amicable divorce, A‐A‐Angie?

171
00:08:15,220 --> 00:08:16,730
Phil, try the potato salad:

172
00:08:16,720 --> 00:08:19,680
your stomach acid will break it down,
and then you'll poop it out in a few days.

173
00:08:22,230 --> 00:08:23,690
and I'm from space.

174
00:08:23,690 --> 00:08:25,980
I should know a good town when I see one
'cause I've been to the moon.

175
00:08:25,980 --> 00:08:28,240
Oh, oh, hey, hey. Don't hide
from me over there, Delvin.

176
00:08:28,230 --> 00:08:30,690
I wanna hear about that dental thing.
Show me those chompers!

177
00:08:30,690 --> 00:08:33,570
‐ You and Korvo have gotten
pretty popular around here, Ter.

178
00:08:36,030 --> 00:08:38,070
We have the juice.
It's like a little charisma thing.

179
00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:38,960
Charisma action going on.

180
00:08:38,950 --> 00:08:41,820
‐ You guys should run
for the president of the HOA.

181
00:08:41,830 --> 00:08:43,710
Ruth, the old lady who runs it now?

182
00:08:43,710 --> 00:08:46,000
We would be so happy
to see that bitch go.

183
00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:49,680
that if we ran for president
of the HOA, we'd win!

184
00:08:49,670 --> 00:08:51,290
‐ Oh my, Terry, do you know
what that means?

185
00:08:52,550 --> 00:08:54,050
‐ We could make all the rules around here.

186
00:08:54,050 --> 00:08:55,600
No more "paint the ship."

187
00:08:55,590 --> 00:08:57,710
No more "don't build a giant hole

188
00:08:57,720 --> 00:09:00,060
in the middle of the road
to capture children in."

189
00:09:00,060 --> 00:09:02,650
‐ I‐I‐I could do some crazy
Disney's Blank Check style stuff,

190
00:09:02,640 --> 00:09:05,470
like build a water slide that goes down
under the ground with a window

191
00:09:05,480 --> 00:09:07,570
and you can see the dinosaur diorama
we built down there

192
00:09:07,560 --> 00:09:08,600
and, oh my god,
it would be so awesome.

193
00:09:11,190 --> 00:09:13,150
Which means they would have
to like me digging up dead bodies

194
00:09:13,150 --> 00:09:14,820
at the cemetery and fucking them.

195
00:09:14,820 --> 00:09:18,940
‐ And the only person who can get in
the way is the old lady president. Ruth.

196
00:09:18,950 --> 00:09:20,410
‐ Ruth.
‐ Ruth.

197
00:09:20,410 --> 00:09:22,420
BOTH: Ruuuuth.

198
00:09:22,410 --> 00:09:24,240
‐ Terry, no. Let's just go spy.

199
00:09:25,210 --> 00:09:28,090
I don't get it, she's been sitting
on her porch for seven hours.

200
00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:30,790
Doesn't seem that tough.
TERRY: It's called stamina. She's flexing.

201
00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:33,430
I'm freaking out. She's the incumbent,
Korvo. They never lose!

202
00:09:33,420 --> 00:09:35,590
‐ You boys want
some peanut butter cookies?

203
00:09:35,590 --> 00:09:36,670
‐ Oh, she's threatening us!

204
00:09:36,680 --> 00:09:39,890
‐ Can you help me get
a blanket down from my shelf?

205
00:09:39,890 --> 00:09:42,230
‐ She's a million years old, man,
she probably knows everything.

206
00:09:42,220 --> 00:09:43,720
How do we compete with that?
We need an edge!

207
00:09:43,730 --> 00:09:44,940
‐ I can update the nanobots,

208
00:09:44,930 --> 00:09:46,850
make them bigger
so they can gather more information.

209
00:09:46,850 --> 00:09:48,270
‐ You're going down, bitch.

210
00:09:48,270 --> 00:09:50,230
[engine starts, tires squealing]

211
00:09:50,820 --> 00:09:52,740
‐ Sorry about the razzing, Yumyulack.

212
00:09:52,730 --> 00:09:56,570
I guess, like, we were so focused
on nicknaming and mocking your nipples

213
00:09:56,570 --> 00:10:00,400
because our buddy JT got
mondo chomped shredding the nar

214
00:10:00,410 --> 00:10:02,370
and had to have
his totes bummer jammed.

215
00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:07,500
‐ See? They were projecting
their own insecurities onto your nipples.

216
00:10:07,500 --> 00:10:10,460
‐ I would have done the same thing
if you'd been mondo chomped.

217
00:10:10,460 --> 00:10:13,340
‐ Ugh, why are we being nice?
I want to kill this little blue‐‐

218
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:15,220
Yumyulack rules!

219
00:10:15,220 --> 00:10:16,800
‐ Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

220
00:10:18,470 --> 00:10:20,850
but I'm actually glad
you hid my shrink ray,

221
00:10:24,720 --> 00:10:26,850
‐ Wait a minute, you're not just
pretending to like humans

222
00:10:26,850 --> 00:10:28,680
so you get the shrink ray back, right?

223
00:10:28,690 --> 00:10:29,690
I'm no schmuck.

224
00:10:32,940 --> 00:10:35,020
‐ Yes!
‐ And I know the perfect place to go next!

225
00:10:35,030 --> 00:10:36,280
‐ Hmm, let me guess.

226
00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:37,870
The guys who work at GameGrape,

227
00:10:37,860 --> 00:10:40,110
the used game store in the mall.

228
00:10:40,110 --> 00:10:42,780
They're always so mean to you,
but I think today‐‐

229
00:10:42,780 --> 00:10:44,240
‐ No, way better. Come on!

230
00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:48,030
‐ What? Um, okay, uh,
wait, ooh, uh, oh boy‐‐

231
00:10:48,040 --> 00:10:49,380
♪ punk rock music playing ♪

232
00:10:49,370 --> 00:10:51,410
‐ [barking]
‐ [man grunts]

233
00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:55,540
A‐actually, you know what?
We've done enough for today!

234
00:10:55,550 --> 00:10:57,340
You've grown so much and I think‐‐
‐ No way.

235
00:10:57,340 --> 00:10:59,810
I need to find out
why these guys are so mean.

236
00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:02,010
I bet it's the ex‐wife
lonely lunch thing again.

237
00:11:02,010 --> 00:11:03,090
‐ Oh man.

238
00:11:04,060 --> 00:11:06,270
‐ Hey, do we have any scissors?
I'm in a little over my head here.

239
00:11:06,270 --> 00:11:08,270
‐ Shut the fuck up, Terry.
I'm upgrading the nanobots.

240
00:11:08,270 --> 00:11:10,230
Smarter nanobots means more information,

241
00:11:10,230 --> 00:11:12,780
and more information means
there's no way we lose the debate.

242
00:11:12,770 --> 00:11:16,140
‐ Such a good idea. Nothing ever goes
wrong when you make robots too smart!

243
00:11:16,690 --> 00:11:18,520
[beeping]

244
00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:23,830
♪ ominous music playing ♪

245
00:11:24,660 --> 00:11:25,660
[grunts]

246
00:11:25,660 --> 00:11:27,500
‐ Well, I'm sure that's the last
I'll see of that.

247
00:11:28,580 --> 00:11:32,420
♪ ominous music playing ♪

248
00:11:32,420 --> 00:11:34,420
[weights clinking]

249
00:11:34,420 --> 00:11:35,630
‐ [whooshing]
‐ [gasps]

250
00:11:38,130 --> 00:11:40,000
[line beeping]

251
00:11:40,880 --> 00:11:44,090
‐ Hello? If anyone is in here,
the police are on their way‐‐ Ohh!

252
00:11:44,100 --> 00:11:46,020
Oh, oh, ow!

253
00:11:46,010 --> 00:11:48,260
[Pupa pants, grunts]

254
00:11:50,980 --> 00:11:52,360
[machine beeping]

255
00:11:55,820 --> 00:11:59,070
‐ We know everything there is to know
about everyone in town.

256
00:11:59,070 --> 00:12:00,780
What they want, what their secrets are.

257
00:12:03,160 --> 00:12:06,460
Like Todd? His favorite color isn't red.
It's orange.

258
00:12:06,450 --> 00:12:08,360
‐ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Who cares,
who cares. What about Ruth?

259
00:12:08,370 --> 00:12:10,710
What is she afraid of?
Does she have any allergies?

260
00:12:10,710 --> 00:12:13,090
What is gonna take her down?
‐ That's my one blind spot.

261
00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:15,910
That old withered bag refuses
to drink water.

262
00:12:15,920 --> 00:12:18,430
‐ Of course! Old people only drink Coke
and they never shower.

263
00:12:18,420 --> 00:12:20,500
‐ It doesn't matter. The only thing
we have to know about her is that

264
00:12:20,510 --> 00:12:23,470
she's about to be the ex head of the HOA.

265
00:12:23,470 --> 00:12:24,720
Nothing can stop us!

266
00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:27,270
Ha ha ha ha, Terry, ha ha ha ha ha ha.

267
00:12:29,020 --> 00:12:31,020
[roaring softly]

268
00:12:31,480 --> 00:12:33,650
‐ Okay, look, you all know us.

269
00:12:33,650 --> 00:12:36,070
Me and Korvo, we give you what you want.

270
00:12:36,060 --> 00:12:38,350
If you vote for us, we've got you covered.

271
00:12:38,360 --> 00:12:40,160
You want big speed bumps
that launch your car

272
00:12:40,150 --> 00:12:41,900
in the air like Dukes of Hazzard? Done.

273
00:12:41,900 --> 00:12:44,440
You want a ski‐lift?
I already crayoned up the plans.

274
00:12:44,450 --> 00:12:46,410
We can break ground today.

275
00:12:46,410 --> 00:12:50,250
‐ Two words: Internet. Fiber.
Not in that order.

276
00:12:50,250 --> 00:12:51,210
You're getting it!
[crowd cheering]

277
00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:53,580
You're all gonna have
super‐fast interneeeet!

278
00:12:53,580 --> 00:12:55,620
‐ You know what?
I kinda feel bad for Ruth.

279
00:12:55,630 --> 00:12:57,460
I bet she dies right
in that chair when we win.

280
00:12:57,460 --> 00:12:59,170
‐ I can't believe we're going
to be presidents.

281
00:12:59,170 --> 00:13:02,180
This is amazing.
President Korvo. Mister Korvo.

282
00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:03,760
‐ Wait.

283
00:13:04,260 --> 00:13:05,470
‐ Wait, what the hell is that?

284
00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:09,560
‐ [raspy voice]
I must speak.

285
00:13:09,560 --> 00:13:11,770
‐ Hey, hey, no, no, no, no.
Don't listen to this guy.

286
00:13:11,770 --> 00:13:14,360
He isn't even really a guy,
he's just a‐a pile of robots.

287
00:13:14,350 --> 00:13:15,640
‐ It's true.

288
00:13:15,650 --> 00:13:20,320
I am composed of a trillion microscopic,
self‐replicating robots,

289
00:13:20,320 --> 00:13:21,740
but I know‐‐ [coughs]

290
00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:27,200
require‐‐
[clears throat]

291
00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:30,080
[normal voice] a stop sign
at the corner of Oak and Main.

292
00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:32,580
People speed through there
like they're street racing.

293
00:13:32,580 --> 00:13:34,630
It's got to stop,
and I can make it happen.

294
00:13:34,620 --> 00:13:35,990
‐ No. What?
‐ No, no, no, no, no.

295
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:37,880
I‐I‐I don't think so, stop the clock.

296
00:13:37,880 --> 00:13:40,220
We already had the debate.
Everyone has to vote right now.

297
00:13:40,210 --> 00:13:41,870
‐ Where did you get that suit?
Take it off.

298
00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:43,010
[audience gasps]

299
00:13:44,970 --> 00:13:47,010
‐ Uh, it's my suit.
‐ Gordon, what the hell?

300
00:13:47,010 --> 00:13:50,430
‐ I too thought at first that this
Nanobot Man was some kind of frightening

301
00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:53,060
X‐Files type, you know,
monster creature.

302
00:13:53,060 --> 00:13:55,020
But then, he took me
to a nice steak dinner.

303
00:13:55,020 --> 00:13:56,060
KORVO: That's all it takes?

304
00:14:00,230 --> 00:14:03,150
but I think if you listen
for a moment, I could‐‐

305
00:14:03,150 --> 00:14:05,060
whoa, flip your vote.

306
00:14:05,070 --> 00:14:06,950
[crowd laughs]
‐ I‐I command you to leave this place!

307
00:14:06,950 --> 00:14:08,290
‐ Let's hear him out!

308
00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:13,170
♪ heavy metal music playing ♪

309
00:14:13,160 --> 00:14:15,370
‐ Hey, guys, we got pudding over here!

310
00:14:15,370 --> 00:14:17,950
Anybody want chocolate‐vanilla swirl?

311
00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:22,960
Man, these guys are real wound up.

312
00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:24,370
This might take more than a pudding cup.

313
00:14:24,380 --> 00:14:25,760
‐ I know, we should probably
just go, right?

314
00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:27,760
‐ You're gonna have to sing them
your friendship song!

315
00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:29,510
‐ [nervous giggle]
I don't know if that's a good idea‐‐

316
00:14:31,180 --> 00:14:32,480
‐ What the fuck?

317
00:14:32,470 --> 00:14:34,300
‐ Hey, guys, if you think
that's punk rock,

318
00:14:34,310 --> 00:14:36,020
wait till you hear my sister's song.

319
00:14:36,020 --> 00:14:38,320
[all shouting]

320
00:14:39,310 --> 00:14:43,310
♪ Interracial love friendship‐‐ ♪

321
00:14:43,320 --> 00:14:44,150
Ah!

322
00:14:45,780 --> 00:14:47,120
Ah!
‐ Ohh! Ah!

323
00:14:48,700 --> 00:14:50,830
‐ Look, I do think humans
are generally nice,

324
00:14:50,820 --> 00:14:52,190
but to prove that point to you today

325
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:54,460
I installed microchips
in all of your enemies' heads

326
00:14:54,450 --> 00:14:56,910
that made them nice
when I clicked this button.

327
00:14:56,910 --> 00:14:58,740
But I didn't know about these neo‐Nazis,

328
00:14:58,750 --> 00:15:01,000
so it's not gonna work
and I think we're gonna die.

329
00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,840
‐ Ah, I told you some people are bad!

330
00:15:05,210 --> 00:15:06,750
This is just like the movie Green Room!

331
00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:08,550
[both scream]

332
00:15:10,050 --> 00:15:11,670
‐ Darnell, your lawnmower broke,

333
00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:13,430
and they don't make
the gear anymore, am I right?

334
00:15:15,310 --> 00:15:17,810
There you go, 3D printed on the spot.

335
00:15:17,810 --> 00:15:20,110
And little Elizabeth, born blind.

336
00:15:20,100 --> 00:15:21,680
Let's see what we can do about that.

337
00:15:21,690 --> 00:15:23,280
[straining]

338
00:15:23,270 --> 00:15:24,270
[machine powers up]
There you go.

339
00:15:24,270 --> 00:15:26,850
‐ I can see all the smells
and sounds! It's amazing!

340
00:15:26,860 --> 00:15:29,370
[laughing]
Seems like your choice is clear:

341
00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:32,280
a vote for Nanobot Man
is a vote for happiness.

342
00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:34,860
‐ The only reason he knows what you want
is because he's been inside your pee.

343
00:15:34,870 --> 00:15:35,410
[crowd gasps]

344
00:15:35,410 --> 00:15:38,420
That's right, Nanobot Man has been spying
on you this whole time.

345
00:15:38,410 --> 00:15:40,910
Do you really want to elect a man
who's been inside your balls

346
00:15:40,920 --> 00:15:42,340
or, or the other stuff?

347
00:15:42,330 --> 00:15:44,660
‐ It's true, I can see it!
I can see everything!

348
00:15:44,670 --> 00:15:46,470
‐ Hah!
[clears throat]

349
00:15:46,460 --> 00:15:49,000
It's true, I have been in all your pee.

350
00:15:49,010 --> 00:15:49,850
[all gasp]

351
00:15:49,840 --> 00:15:52,630
I didn't want to bring this up,
but they've forced my hand.

352
00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:56,180
Korvo is my dad,
and he built my nanobot bodies.

353
00:15:56,180 --> 00:15:58,520
And he and Terry put me in the water

354
00:15:58,520 --> 00:16:01,520
so they could read your minds
and give you presents.

355
00:16:01,520 --> 00:16:03,110
You can't elect these two liars.

356
00:16:03,100 --> 00:16:05,600
You're not their customer,
you are their product.

357
00:16:05,610 --> 00:16:07,820
‐ We harvest the data
for the good of the community!
[crowd shouting]

358
00:16:07,820 --> 00:16:09,660
How else would we know
that Dave needs a new shed

359
00:16:09,650 --> 00:16:10,770
for all his sex dolls?

360
00:16:10,780 --> 00:16:12,120
We can give him that shed!

361
00:16:12,110 --> 00:16:14,990
‐ That's not true! I have sex
with living, human beings!

362
00:16:14,990 --> 00:16:17,030
I love the feeling
of being pressed up against‐‐

363
00:16:17,040 --> 00:16:19,580
[shudders] a warm bag of bones
and blood that can give consent.

364
00:16:19,580 --> 00:16:21,590
‐ I know you better than these guys.

365
00:16:21,580 --> 00:16:24,830
I know that Becky buried her
Guatemalan housekeeper in the back yard.

366
00:16:24,830 --> 00:16:26,660
[crowd gasps]
NANOBOT MAN: How 'bout that?
That's a big secret right there.

367
00:16:26,670 --> 00:16:28,590
‐ I'm sorry, what? You killed Lupe!

368
00:16:28,590 --> 00:16:30,930
‐ Uh, uh, Jeremy's poisoning
his wife for insurance.

369
00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:34,250
Uh, Lesley Donovan teaches class
while wearing a hidden vibrator.

370
00:16:34,260 --> 00:16:35,600
Samantha is cheating on Michael with Joey!
[Samantha gasps]

371
00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:36,980
‐ What the fuck?

372
00:16:36,970 --> 00:16:39,590
TERRY: Phyllis spent all her kid's
cancer medicine money on a purse.

373
00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:41,690
KORVO: Bobby snuck shit in a pie
at the pie place.

374
00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:43,350
Everyone should be mad
about that.

375
00:16:43,350 --> 00:16:45,680
‐ Gary has a cactus fetish.
‐ Robert keyed Leslie's car.

376
00:16:45,690 --> 00:16:47,650
‐ This is all your fault.
You're making everyone fight!

377
00:16:47,650 --> 00:16:48,450
‐ Fuck you, Terry!

378
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:49,310
[Terry grunts]
NANOBOT MAN: Ow!

379
00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:50,200
[Neo‐Nazis screaming]

380
00:16:50,190 --> 00:16:51,980
‐ Give me the shrink ray back!
‐ It's in my dollhouse!

381
00:16:51,990 --> 00:16:53,910
‐ What? You know
what's going to happen right now

382
00:16:53,910 --> 00:16:55,370
because you did that?
‐Yeah.

383
00:16:55,370 --> 00:16:57,700
‐ Now I have to take these guys out
with lethal force!

384
00:16:57,700 --> 00:16:59,710
‐ I'm going to stick
my knife up your‐‐ Ahh!

385
00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:01,530
[all groan]

386
00:17:01,540 --> 00:17:04,000
♪ The Blue Danube Waltz playing ♪

387
00:17:05,580 --> 00:17:06,580
[grunting]

388
00:17:07,500 --> 00:17:10,170
‐ I don't like doing this!
‐ I said I was sorry!

389
00:17:10,170 --> 00:17:12,540
‐ It's the suit, not me, it's the suit.

390
00:17:13,220 --> 00:17:14,470
The suit's on auto pilot.

391
00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:18,060
[screams]
YUMYULACK: It just does this, sorry.

392
00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:21,190
Maybe, uh, I don't know,
maybe be tolerant next time.

393
00:17:21,180 --> 00:17:23,140
‐ Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

394
00:17:23,560 --> 00:17:24,820
Sorry about that eye.

395
00:17:26,940 --> 00:17:28,490
‐ Ugh!
[rifle zapping]

396
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:29,770
‐ Damn you, nanobots!
NANOBOT MAN: Me?

397
00:17:29,770 --> 00:17:31,850
This is all your fault! Nobody likes you!

398
00:17:31,860 --> 00:17:32,610
‐ Take that back!

399
00:17:35,030 --> 00:17:36,700
[growling]

400
00:17:47,040 --> 00:17:48,120
[straining]

401
00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:51,040
[straining]

402
00:17:53,420 --> 00:17:55,210
‐ Ah!
[gulping noisily]

403
00:18:04,850 --> 00:18:06,810
‐ Ah! Ahhh!

404
00:18:06,810 --> 00:18:09,060
‐ Okay, stop! Everyone stop.

405
00:18:09,060 --> 00:18:10,680
Everyone just shut the fuck up.

406
00:18:10,690 --> 00:18:13,410
Look at yourselves. T‐this is fucked.

407
00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:14,980
I've been living here for 30 years

408
00:18:14,990 --> 00:18:17,700
and we never had any sci‐fi bullshit.

409
00:18:17,700 --> 00:18:19,700
You want things normal and regular.

410
00:18:19,700 --> 00:18:23,670
Don't vote for these
stupid ugly Alf‐lookin' motherfuckers.

411
00:18:23,660 --> 00:18:25,660
I've had enough. Fuck these guys.

412
00:18:25,660 --> 00:18:26,700
‐ You tell 'em, Ruth!

413
00:18:26,710 --> 00:18:28,630
‐ You're goddamn right I'll tell 'em.

414
00:18:28,630 --> 00:18:30,210
It's fucking bullshit.

415
00:18:30,210 --> 00:18:32,260
I just want to fucking live in peace.

416
00:18:32,250 --> 00:18:34,580
Vote for me, that's all I got to say.

417
00:18:34,590 --> 00:18:36,220
[crowd chanting]
‐ Ruth! Ruth! Ruth! Ruth!

418
00:18:36,220 --> 00:18:37,930
‐ But I can make free electricity

419
00:18:37,930 --> 00:18:40,020
by harnessing the temperature change
in the air!

420
00:18:40,010 --> 00:18:43,130
It solves global warming! Come on!

421
00:18:43,140 --> 00:18:46,190
‐ A‐and I have big ideas for
a video game library that we can all use!

422
00:18:46,180 --> 00:18:48,720
‐ Shut up and go back to your home
in the Abyss!

423
00:18:48,730 --> 00:18:50,730
‐ Not all aliens are from the Abyss!

424
00:18:50,730 --> 00:18:52,320
I don't even know you, who are you?

425
00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:54,570
‐ I'm Tyler, and I think you suck.

426
00:18:54,570 --> 00:18:56,160
‐ I knew it! I knew that was Tyler!

427
00:18:56,150 --> 00:18:57,940
‐ Fuck you! I've always hated you!

428
00:18:57,950 --> 00:18:59,330
‐ Why would we even be from the Abyss?

429
00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:01,780
We have a spaceship sticking
out of the top of our house.

430
00:19:02,330 --> 00:19:04,580
NANOBOT MAN: I guess sometimes
when you gain sentience

431
00:19:04,580 --> 00:19:06,540
and you're full of data
about a neighborhood,

432
00:19:06,540 --> 00:19:07,920
you can overreach.

433
00:19:07,910 --> 00:19:09,540
I was just trying to help,

434
00:19:09,540 --> 00:19:11,790
and I ended up hurting
the people I love the most.

435
00:19:11,790 --> 00:19:13,210
I'm sorry, guys. Truly.

436
00:19:13,210 --> 00:19:14,830
I hope you still like me after all this.

437
00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:17,300
‐ Yes, I still like you, Mr. Nanobots.

438
00:19:17,300 --> 00:19:19,010
But you know what?
I'm starting to think

439
00:19:19,010 --> 00:19:21,140
I have to stop worrying
about who likes me.

440
00:19:21,140 --> 00:19:23,560
I guess some humans
are unevolved bigots

441
00:19:23,560 --> 00:19:25,230
who don't know a good thing
when they see one.

442
00:19:25,220 --> 00:19:27,390
‐ Us sci‐fi folks need to stick together.

443
00:19:27,390 --> 00:19:29,890
To be honest, I'm proud
that I made such good nanobots

444
00:19:29,890 --> 00:19:31,470
that they tried
to take over the neighborhood.

445
00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:33,820
Now all of you: back in the bag.
We've got work to do on the ship.

446
00:19:33,820 --> 00:19:35,780
‐ But I want to live in a house
and fall in love

447
00:19:35,780 --> 00:19:37,160
and build a recipe folder.

448
00:19:37,150 --> 00:19:39,940
‐ Well, tough. I need to spray you
on a navigation panel.

449
00:19:39,950 --> 00:19:41,790
You know you have to listen to me, right?

450
00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:43,030
[grunts]
Get back here!

451
00:19:43,030 --> 00:19:44,610
You can't just be free! Damn it!

452
00:19:44,620 --> 00:19:46,000
‐ Man, they grow up so fast.

453
00:19:45,990 --> 00:19:47,740
Well, since we lost the election

454
00:19:47,750 --> 00:19:50,000
and everyone's all crazy
high‐concept racist now,

455
00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:52,420
I guess that means we better paint
the ship to match the roof, huh?

456
00:19:52,420 --> 00:19:54,720
‐ I'll be painting it
even more silver than before.

457
00:19:54,710 --> 00:19:58,210
I'm going to light it up at night
so Ruth can see it from a mile away.

458
00:19:58,210 --> 00:20:01,000
‐ But the rules‐‐
‐ It's a $50 fine. I'll eat it.

459
00:20:01,010 --> 00:20:02,310
‐ Yeah, but then people won't like us‐‐

460
00:20:04,260 --> 00:20:05,760
‐ Did you give him candy again?
‐ No!

461
00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,340
‐ Damn it, Terry! He's getting it
from somewhere

462
00:20:07,350 --> 00:20:09,400
and if he's not getting it from me,
he has to be getting it from you!

463
00:20:09,390 --> 00:20:11,180
‐ I don't know, man.
I‐I would remember if I did, but‐‐

464
00:20:11,190 --> 00:20:12,150
‐ What do you mean you would remember?

465
00:20:12,150 --> 00:20:13,530
If he's not getting it from you,
where is he getting it?

466
00:20:13,520 --> 00:20:14,640
‐ I don't know okay!
‐ Where?

467
00:20:14,650 --> 00:20:16,070
‐ Stop yelling at me!
‐ I'll yell at you as much as I want.

468
00:20:16,570 --> 00:20:18,740
‐ [Jesse sighs]
I shouldn't have lied to you.

469
00:20:18,740 --> 00:20:21,950
Humans are complicated, but I
didn't think they were so complicated

470
00:20:21,950 --> 00:20:23,410
that they would try to kill us.

471
00:20:23,410 --> 00:20:25,410
‐ After today, I can tell
it's important to you

472
00:20:25,410 --> 00:20:27,160
that I be careful who I put in the wall.

473
00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:30,630
So from now on, I'll make sure that
everyone in the wall deserves to be‐‐

474
00:20:30,620 --> 00:20:32,280
Ooh, a guy in a red shirt!
[blaster zaps]

475
00:20:33,210 --> 00:20:36,380
‐ Wait, but‐‐
‐ Look, I had people in shirts
of all the other colors.

476
00:20:36,380 --> 00:20:39,300
I promise we'll use due process
on the next one.

477
00:20:39,300 --> 00:20:40,260
Don't yell at me.

478
00:20:40,260 --> 00:20:42,050
‐ Eh, he was probably a Nazi.

479
00:20:43,380 --> 00:20:45,670
I like humans, but I hate shoes.

480
00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:47,980
Like, how are we supposed
to taste the ground?

481
00:20:47,970 --> 00:20:49,930
‐ I don't know, they don't flavor
their ground either.

482
00:20:49,930 --> 00:20:51,680
‐ Pff! Weird, right?
‐ [man screams]

483
00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:53,010
[grunts]
Oh!

484
00:20:53,020 --> 00:20:54,980
Hey, hey. What's going on here?
Where are we?

485
00:20:54,980 --> 00:20:56,150
W‐what is this? What is this?
[rumbling, clattering]

486
00:20:56,150 --> 00:20:57,280
What the hell is happening?

487
00:20:58,320 --> 00:20:59,910
[all screaming]

488
00:20:59,900 --> 00:21:00,980
[coughing]

489
00:21:00,990 --> 00:21:03,080
♪ ominous music playing ♪

490
00:21:03,070 --> 00:21:05,440
Oh my god. What is this place?

491
00:21:06,910 --> 00:21:07,960
[panting]

492
00:21:07,950 --> 00:21:09,320
Wait, why‐‐ w‐‐where are you going?

493
00:21:09,330 --> 00:21:10,540
‐ Anywhere but here!

494
00:21:11,120 --> 00:21:12,250
[grunts]

495
00:21:15,420 --> 00:21:16,420
[all gasp]

496
00:21:16,420 --> 00:21:18,550
[all screaming]

497
00:21:21,090 --> 00:21:22,090
[groans]

498
00:21:27,850 --> 00:21:30,390
‐ D‐don't hurt me, don't hurt me.
‐ Empty your pockets.

499
00:21:31,850 --> 00:21:33,610
Ugh!
‐ Hey wait, wait, wait, hey.

500
00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:34,720
I don't belong here!

501
00:21:34,730 --> 00:21:37,400
Two little aliens just shrank me down
for no reason.

502
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:39,570
I'm just a regular guy.
I didn't do anything to anybody.

503
00:21:39,570 --> 00:21:41,360
‐ More Taffy bandits
will be arriving soon,

504
00:21:41,360 --> 00:21:42,990
and the gum boys move south at night.

505
00:21:42,990 --> 00:21:44,990
We don't want to be anywhere near here
when they meet.

506
00:21:44,990 --> 00:21:46,620
‐ Why are they called gum boys?

507
00:21:47,240 --> 00:21:48,620
‐ They love gum.

508
00:21:48,620 --> 00:21:51,040
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

509
00:21:51,040 --> 00:21:54,040
♪

510
00:21:56,880 --> 00:21:58,670
‐ Did they make a True Lies 2?

511
00:21:58,670 --> 00:22:00,260
The Arnold Schwarzenegger movie.

512
00:22:00,250 --> 00:22:01,960
Is there a sequel to that?

513
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:04,420
♪ dramatic music playing ♪

514
00:22:04,420 --> 00:22:08,420
♪

515
00:22:40,460 --> 00:22:45,010
♪

516
00:22:46,300 --> 00:22:47,800
[imitating laser fire]