1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:03,003
[♪ dramatic theme playing]
2
00:00:09,384 --> 00:00:12,387
[♪ suspenseful Western music playing]
3
00:00:18,351 --> 00:00:19,811
[shrieks]
4
00:00:23,440 --> 00:00:25,358
[♪ tense music playing]
5
00:00:27,944 --> 00:00:29,487
Hmm.
6
00:00:30,113 --> 00:00:31,281
[slurps]
7
00:00:31,364 --> 00:00:33,158
Porcupine. No, wait.
8
00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:35,952
[slurping]
9
00:00:37,328 --> 00:00:38,997
Hedgehog.
10
00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:42,375
♪
11
00:00:42,459 --> 00:00:43,960
Hyah, lizard, hyah!
12
00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:47,505
[lizard galloping]
13
00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:49,841
♪
14
00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:53,219
[Korvo] Planet Shlorp
was a perfect utopia,
15
00:00:53,303 --> 00:00:55,346
until the asteroid hit.
16
00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:58,308
One hundred adults and their replicants
were issued a Pupa,
17
00:00:58,391 --> 00:01:00,143
and escaped into the... space,
18
00:01:00,226 --> 00:01:02,937
searching for new homes
on uninhabited worlds.
19
00:01:03,021 --> 00:01:04,189
We crashed on Earth,
20
00:01:04,272 --> 00:01:06,483
{\an8}stranding us on an already
overpopulated planet.
21
00:01:06,566 --> 00:01:08,109
{\an8}That's right, I've been talking
this whole time.
22
00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:09,277
{\an8}I'm the one holding the Pupa.
23
00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,071
{\an8}My name is Korvo. This is my show.
24
00:01:11,154 --> 00:01:12,363
{\an8}Bollocks, I just dropped the Pupa.
25
00:01:12,447 --> 00:01:14,324
{\an8}Ugh. This is ridiculous. I hate Earth.
26
00:01:14,407 --> 00:01:17,077
{\an8}It's a horrible home.
People are stupid and confusing.
27
00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:19,579
{\an8}Why do all these old billionaires put
young people's blood in their veins
28
00:01:19,662 --> 00:01:22,165
{\an8}when they can be paying
to put Gray 55, the robot blood,
29
00:01:22,248 --> 00:01:23,583
{\an8}directly into their genitals?
30
00:01:23,666 --> 00:01:24,667
{\an8}That's the good stuff!
31
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[♪ dramatic music playing]
32
00:01:30,548 --> 00:01:33,468
[♪ suspenseful Western music playing]
33
00:01:34,427 --> 00:01:37,263
I heard there was an old PEZ dispenser
out here somewhere.
34
00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:39,933
- Do you think we'll get to see it?
- Don't know, don't care.
35
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:43,394
I wonder what character it is.
36
00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:44,979
Ooh, and what flavor the PEZ is.
37
00:01:45,063 --> 00:01:46,189
Ooh, and if we find it,
38
00:01:46,272 --> 00:01:47,649
I'm gonna crawl up on the top
to get a view of the--
39
00:01:47,732 --> 00:01:49,025
Stop trying to make this fun.
40
00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:50,777
That bounty hunter
could still be tracking us.
41
00:01:50,860 --> 00:01:52,862
[Sofia] You know,
I'm not some naive kid.
42
00:01:52,946 --> 00:01:55,990
I did pretty good with your hippie pal
in Sandbox Town, didn't I?
43
00:01:56,074 --> 00:01:58,034
You almost got killed, twice!
44
00:01:58,118 --> 00:01:59,160
Ah, but I didn't.
45
00:01:59,244 --> 00:02:01,955
Meanwhile, you were higher
than Matthew McConaughey's kite.
46
00:02:02,038 --> 00:02:03,414
[deep voice]
"Oh, I'm Gavin.
47
00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:05,625
"I'm a lightweight who can't handle
some mushrooms.
48
00:02:05,708 --> 00:02:09,170
Oh, take me to the hospital,
I can't feel my old hands."
49
00:02:09,254 --> 00:02:12,090
I need to deliver these supplies
to the NoHo Hank Funko Pop
50
00:02:12,173 --> 00:02:15,135
Terry threw into the yard
when Barry turned into a drama.
51
00:02:15,218 --> 00:02:17,220
Nothing in my orders
about keeping you alive.
52
00:02:17,303 --> 00:02:18,555
{\an8}Ooh, what's this thing?
53
00:02:18,638 --> 00:02:20,348
{\an8}[Gavin] [sighs]
Basketballburgh.
54
00:02:20,431 --> 00:02:22,058
I've heard about Basketballburgh!
55
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:25,645
[gasps] Do they really have
a rollercoaster made out of K'nex?
56
00:02:25,728 --> 00:02:27,272
Yeah, but it's the kind
that's only scary
57
00:02:27,355 --> 00:02:29,399
because you think it's gonna
fall over the whole time.
58
00:02:29,482 --> 00:02:31,734
Maybe if you get to like me,
we can be scared of it together.
59
00:02:31,818 --> 00:02:34,487
I don't want to like you.
I want to be done with this.
60
00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:35,613
Hyah!
61
00:02:40,577 --> 00:02:41,578
[both gasp]
62
00:02:42,620 --> 00:02:45,081
[♪ uplifting music playing]
63
00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:46,749
Oh, my God, water!
64
00:02:48,334 --> 00:02:49,669
This better not be a mirage!
65
00:02:49,752 --> 00:02:52,630
Actually, I don't even care.
It's so hot, I'll take the illusion.
66
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:54,549
Something's not right.
67
00:02:54,632 --> 00:02:56,801
Why does it smell like
the Smirnoff outlet store?
68
00:02:58,303 --> 00:02:59,804
[dragonfly sizzles, shrieks]
69
00:02:59,888 --> 00:03:01,347
Last one in's a shitty wad of shit.
70
00:03:01,431 --> 00:03:02,557
- [Gavin grunts]
- [Sofia yelps]
71
00:03:03,933 --> 00:03:05,685
- What the hell?
- Look!
72
00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:09,939
Oh, my God.
That dragonfly can't swim.
73
00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:12,150
Someone call a bug lifeguard!
74
00:03:12,233 --> 00:03:13,568
It's not water.
75
00:03:13,651 --> 00:03:15,445
[bugs squealing]
76
00:03:15,987 --> 00:03:18,865
[Sofia] Jesus, what the hell is it?
77
00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:22,035
[gasps] Hand sanitizer,
78
00:03:22,118 --> 00:03:24,204
the cheap kind that smells
like coyote vagina.
79
00:03:24,287 --> 00:03:26,247
At our scale, this stuff burns like acid.
80
00:03:26,331 --> 00:03:27,415
[leaf sizzles]
81
00:03:27,498 --> 00:03:28,958
Oh, my God, I could've died.
82
00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:31,669
Hey, hey, you didn't.
You're okay.
83
00:03:31,753 --> 00:03:33,630
I don't think I like
the Back Yard.
84
00:03:33,713 --> 00:03:36,299
Yeah, well, I don't really like anything.
85
00:03:36,799 --> 00:03:38,885
Except for Coldplay, they rule.
86
00:03:39,844 --> 00:03:43,723
[♪ intense ominous music playing]
87
00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:47,644
{\an8}Come on, guys,
he's gonna be here any second!
88
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:49,729
I broke out the gouda today!
89
00:03:49,812 --> 00:03:52,106
Only the fanciest cheese
for our famous friend.
90
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:54,776
Avatar! My blue!
91
00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:57,528
- [Pupa grunting]
- [JK Sevens whirring]
92
00:03:58,529 --> 00:04:00,281
- [Pupa shouts]
- [tray clatters]
93
00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:01,824
{\an8}Ah, my charcuterie board!
94
00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:03,576
{\an8}You know how many TikToks
I had to study
95
00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:04,953
{\an8}to get the meat flopped right?
96
00:04:05,036 --> 00:04:06,788
{\an8}I told you two
to stay out of the kitchen!
97
00:04:06,871 --> 00:04:09,249
{\an8}[Jesse] Why are you fighting?
I thought you were besties.
98
00:04:09,332 --> 00:04:10,333
{\an8}They're both Geminis.
99
00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:13,002
{\an8}When Saturn's in their
seventh house, good luck!
100
00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:15,088
{\an8}Neither of them were born
on this planet.
101
00:04:15,171 --> 00:04:17,090
{\an8}The star signs are hecka different.
102
00:04:17,173 --> 00:04:19,634
{\an8}Gemini energy is bigger
than galactic star charts!
103
00:04:19,717 --> 00:04:21,010
{\an8}You two better suck it up.
104
00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:23,054
{\an8}Our famous friend's coming over
to hang out today.
105
00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:25,223
{\an8}But what he doesn't know
is that it's actually an intervention.
106
00:04:25,306 --> 00:04:28,559
{\an8}Turns out you can have
too much alcohol and heroin,
107
00:04:28,643 --> 00:04:31,562
{\an8}and weed, and all the other drugs
smooshed up into a big ball.
108
00:04:31,646 --> 00:04:34,357
{\an8}He's going to freak out.
Everyone needs to be as quiet as possible
109
00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:36,025
{\an8}while we spring a friend trap
on his ass.
110
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:39,112
{\an8}Oh, man, the look on his face
when we confront him with his own failings
111
00:04:39,195 --> 00:04:42,198
is gonna be tragic! [chuckles]
112
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,742
[missiles whooshing]
113
00:04:44,826 --> 00:04:46,452
- [missiles exploding]
- [all screaming]
114
00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:47,537
[crockery clanking]
115
00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,914
Stop it with the sci-fi fight already!
116
00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:51,165
- [Pupa grunts]
- That's it, if you can't behave,
117
00:04:51,249 --> 00:04:52,458
then we're locking you two in the Manc Ave
118
00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:53,960
until the intervention is over!
119
00:04:54,043 --> 00:04:55,545
[Pupa grunts]
120
00:04:55,628 --> 00:04:57,255
You two are like feral cats!
121
00:04:57,338 --> 00:04:59,674
Are we sure it's a good idea
to leave them alone?
122
00:04:59,757 --> 00:05:01,968
{\an8}Yeah, we had to move a lot
of dangerous stuff down here
123
00:05:02,051 --> 00:05:04,178
{\an8}to make room for the intervention
in the living room.
124
00:05:04,262 --> 00:05:06,014
Like that laser cannon
and the ottoman.
125
00:05:06,097 --> 00:05:07,515
It's all harmless, they'll be fine.
126
00:05:07,598 --> 00:05:09,934
{\an8}What about this microuniverse
in a snow globe?
127
00:05:10,018 --> 00:05:13,104
{\an8}Or this soul disc you made Terry
after he saw Tron?
128
00:05:13,187 --> 00:05:15,523
{\an8}Oh, yeah, we recorded
my soul onto that thing
129
00:05:15,606 --> 00:05:17,442
{\an8}so I could live in the grid as a program.
130
00:05:17,525 --> 00:05:18,860
{\an8}I'm hella bicoastal, baby.
131
00:05:18,943 --> 00:05:20,111
{\an8}I made that up to make you happy.
132
00:05:20,194 --> 00:05:21,696
{\an8}So I still have my digital soul?
133
00:05:21,779 --> 00:05:23,323
{\an8}- Not cool!
- Ah!
134
00:05:23,406 --> 00:05:24,407
{\an8}- Ah!
- [Jesse gasps]
135
00:05:24,490 --> 00:05:25,491
{\an8}Ah!
136
00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:29,495
{\an8}Whew, you almost released
The Thing from The Thing.
137
00:05:29,579 --> 00:05:32,040
{\an8}That's a Miss Thing,
so we don't get sued.
138
00:05:32,123 --> 00:05:33,791
{\an8}- Wink, wink.
- [Miss Thing growls]
139
00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:35,168
{\an8}[Pupa gasps]
140
00:05:35,543 --> 00:05:37,712
{\an8}But even in clearable parody form,
141
00:05:37,795 --> 00:05:41,382
{\an8}this little lady is just as dangerous
as her big-screen counterpart.
142
00:05:41,466 --> 00:05:44,719
Ah, geez, we can't leave them
down here with Miss Thing.
143
00:05:44,802 --> 00:05:46,637
- She'll eat them and steal their DNA.
- [Pupa gasps]
144
00:05:46,721 --> 00:05:49,932
Wow, Jesse, um, women have
to support other women.
145
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:52,310
She's just jealous because
Miss Thing rocks a bow better.
146
00:05:52,393 --> 00:05:54,937
We'll just put her way up here.
Problem solved.
147
00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:56,064
- [doorbell rings]
- [group gasps]
148
00:05:56,147 --> 00:05:58,733
Oh, my stars and garters, I haven't lit
the candle in the bathroom yet!
149
00:05:58,816 --> 00:05:59,817
Listen to me, you two,
150
00:05:59,901 --> 00:06:01,694
if either of you come upstairs
for even a second,
151
00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:03,196
you're grounded for life!
152
00:06:03,279 --> 00:06:05,823
But if you can make it through
this intervention without fighting,
153
00:06:05,907 --> 00:06:08,451
we'll take you to your favorite
fast casual French restaurant.
154
00:06:08,534 --> 00:06:11,412
- Au Bon Pain?
- Oui. So be good.
155
00:06:12,163 --> 00:06:13,498
Here, just zone out and watch
156
00:06:13,581 --> 00:06:15,583
{\an8}the director's commentary-only
edition of Shrek.
157
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:17,418
[director] [on screen]
For this first scene, I wanted
158
00:06:17,502 --> 00:06:20,046
a sweeping wide shot,
but the studio insisted on starting
159
00:06:20,129 --> 00:06:22,507
with Shrek coming out
of an outhouse, wiping his ass.
160
00:06:22,590 --> 00:06:25,551
Now a lot of people wanna know
how we got the donkey to talk.
161
00:06:25,635 --> 00:06:28,429
No, it's not peanut butter.
It was computers.
162
00:06:28,763 --> 00:06:32,016
[♪ suspenseful Western music playing]
163
00:06:33,476 --> 00:06:35,144
You know what I miss
about the before-fore?
164
00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:37,772
Being big enough that
a raindrop wouldn't kill me?
165
00:06:37,855 --> 00:06:39,857
Yeah, I was gonna say $5 foot longs.
166
00:06:39,941 --> 00:06:42,110
But that raindrop thing
really is a problem.
167
00:06:42,527 --> 00:06:43,861
[Hedgey purrs]
168
00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:46,697
- Hedgey, did you just purr at her?
- We're friends.
169
00:06:46,781 --> 00:06:49,158
He wraps his little arms
around me when we sleep.
170
00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:50,493
I call them hedgehugs.
171
00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:52,286
I've been beggin' you for hedgehugs.
172
00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:53,371
[Hedgey groans]
173
00:06:53,454 --> 00:06:57,125
He makes me feel safe,
at least for a minute.
174
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:59,168
The Yard's a hard place to live,
175
00:06:59,252 --> 00:07:01,170
but I'll take it over the Wall any day.
176
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:03,381
The Wall didn't have poison lakes.
177
00:07:03,464 --> 00:07:05,925
Worse. I was there for every era.
178
00:07:06,008 --> 00:07:07,301
[crowd roaring]
179
00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:09,971
I stormed the Duke's staircase
in Wall War I.
180
00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:14,600
When Tim took over, I helped clean
and distribute sex toys to the needy.
181
00:07:16,185 --> 00:07:18,813
I even smuggled Raisinettes
over the wall in the Wall
182
00:07:18,896 --> 00:07:20,690
when the Bowinians split off.
183
00:07:21,357 --> 00:07:23,443
[Sofia]
No Duke or Bowinians out here.
184
00:07:23,526 --> 00:07:25,445
That's right, this is a simple yard.
185
00:07:25,528 --> 00:07:28,865
Look at us delivering fruit
to hungry people, no politics.
186
00:07:28,948 --> 00:07:30,450
That's the way to live.
187
00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:35,580
[♪ foreboding music playing]
188
00:07:37,665 --> 00:07:39,834
[JK Sevens beeping]
189
00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:42,170
Mine!
190
00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:43,504
Mine! Mine!
191
00:07:44,922 --> 00:07:46,132
No! Ah!
192
00:07:47,091 --> 00:07:48,926
[♪ suspenseful music playing]
193
00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:51,888
- [JK Sevens beeping]
- Ah!
194
00:07:51,971 --> 00:07:54,640
[Miss Thing shrieks]
195
00:07:58,060 --> 00:07:59,061
Aah!
196
00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:04,609
- [Miss Thing shrieking]
- [objects crashing]
197
00:08:05,193 --> 00:08:07,153
What the... Oh, finally!
198
00:08:07,236 --> 00:08:09,614
Do you know how long I've been trapped
in the digital world?
199
00:08:09,697 --> 00:08:11,657
There isn't even
a single Del Taco in there!
200
00:08:11,741 --> 00:08:12,742
- [Miss Thing shrieks]
- Ah!
201
00:08:14,410 --> 00:08:16,370
[weapon whirring]
202
00:08:16,454 --> 00:08:17,622
Ah!
203
00:08:17,705 --> 00:08:18,706
[Miss Thing shrieks]
204
00:08:19,540 --> 00:08:21,667
- [bats shrieking]
- Ah!
205
00:08:22,668 --> 00:08:24,420
[♪ suspenseful music playing]
206
00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:25,796
[Miss Thing shrieks]
207
00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:27,632
♪
208
00:08:32,929 --> 00:08:33,930
What's wrong, boy?
209
00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:35,223
Road's blocked.
210
00:08:36,224 --> 00:08:38,267
Usually, Terry throws his chicken legs
211
00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:40,144
closer to the kitchen window.
212
00:08:40,228 --> 00:08:42,146
- [sword swishes]
- [Gavin and Sofia shout]
213
00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:45,399
- [lizard hisses]
- [Sofia] It's the bounty hunter!
214
00:08:45,483 --> 00:08:47,360
Jesus Christ, where?
Oh, me.
215
00:08:47,443 --> 00:08:48,819
Hyah, Hedgey, hyah!
216
00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:51,697
[grunts]
217
00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:54,825
[lizard growls]
218
00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,454
He's still coming!
219
00:08:58,538 --> 00:08:59,914
We gotta go off-road!
220
00:09:00,706 --> 00:09:03,376
[grass rustling]
221
00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:09,131
PEZ!
222
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:11,801
Oh, shit! No time to stop!
Go, Hedgey, go!
223
00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:15,721
- [wagon thuds]
- [Gavin and Sofia grunt]
224
00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:19,767
Good boy! Get us outta this
and it's grubs for dinner all week!
225
00:09:19,850 --> 00:09:21,185
- [Hedgey squeals]
- [Gavin and Sofia scream]
226
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,229
- Come on!
- Look!
227
00:09:25,398 --> 00:09:26,649
Hurry, push!
228
00:09:26,732 --> 00:09:28,818
♪
229
00:09:30,945 --> 00:09:32,863
- It's working.
- [lizard roars]
230
00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:34,365
[Bounty Hunter grumbles]
231
00:09:38,744 --> 00:09:40,454
Hyah, hyah. [clicks tongue]
232
00:09:40,538 --> 00:09:42,456
It'll take him hours
to get all the way around.
233
00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:43,708
This is gonna work.
234
00:09:44,625 --> 00:09:46,419
- [Sofia] Ah, we're sinking!
- [Gavin] Ah!
235
00:09:47,003 --> 00:09:48,921
Oh, no, we need to jettison weight.
236
00:09:49,005 --> 00:09:50,339
- [Hedgey screaming]
- Hedgey, quit it.
237
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,425
- It's gonna be okay.
- Ah, come on!
238
00:09:52,508 --> 00:09:54,927
- Hedgey.
- Hedgey, please, you need to stay calm.
239
00:09:55,928 --> 00:09:57,138
Ah, god, it burns!
240
00:09:57,221 --> 00:09:58,681
[Sofia] Oh, my God, are you okay?
241
00:09:58,764 --> 00:10:01,309
We're still sinking.
We need to lighten the load.
242
00:10:01,392 --> 00:10:02,893
- No!
- Hedgey, no!
243
00:10:04,228 --> 00:10:06,314
[♪ poignant music playing]
244
00:10:09,692 --> 00:10:11,652
- [Hedgey whinnies]
- [liquid splashing gently]
245
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,446
- [Hedgey vocalizing]
- [both gasp]
246
00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:17,950
His quills protect him
from the hand sanitizer!
247
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,118
Good boy!
248
00:10:19,201 --> 00:10:22,246
Ha! I'm learning a shit-ton
about hedgehogs today.
249
00:10:22,330 --> 00:10:23,748
Crap!
250
00:10:23,831 --> 00:10:26,375
We took on too much goo. Come on!
251
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:29,211
We can save the food, pass it over.
252
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:30,838
We can't leave the cart.
253
00:10:30,921 --> 00:10:32,882
We can build a new cart.
254
00:10:33,382 --> 00:10:34,967
Stop it!
What are you doing?
255
00:10:35,051 --> 00:10:37,595
We don't need the cart
if we don't have the food!
256
00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:39,388
It's ruined.
257
00:10:39,930 --> 00:10:41,432
Goddammit.
258
00:10:43,225 --> 00:10:46,187
[♪ tense music playing]
259
00:10:48,731 --> 00:10:49,774
[groans]
260
00:10:50,858 --> 00:10:53,903
You better have a really good answer
for what just happened.
261
00:10:53,986 --> 00:10:56,322
Um, I did the cart thing.
262
00:10:56,405 --> 00:10:58,824
You call hand sanitizer goo.
263
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:00,409
Let's not point fingers.
264
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:01,952
What is wrong with you?
265
00:11:04,872 --> 00:11:06,666
[Miss Thing hissing]
266
00:11:08,918 --> 00:11:10,920
- [JK Sevens beeps]
- [Pupa grunts]
267
00:11:12,463 --> 00:11:13,798
[sighs]
268
00:11:14,215 --> 00:11:16,092
Ah! Au Bon Pain!
269
00:11:17,218 --> 00:11:19,053
[Terry] I forgive you
for getting gacked on blow
270
00:11:19,136 --> 00:11:20,346
and then running me over
with your convertible.
271
00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:22,098
No matter how many castles you defeat,
272
00:11:22,181 --> 00:11:25,059
you'll never find the drug
that makes you you again.
273
00:11:25,142 --> 00:11:27,687
You know, I remember when you started out
as a simple gamer boy,
274
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,730
but ever since the movie came out,
you've changed.
275
00:11:29,814 --> 00:11:32,149
You wanna fight the final boss?
Look in the mirror.
276
00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:34,902
[friend] [in Italian accent]
Wahoo, that was beautiful, Terry.
277
00:11:34,985 --> 00:11:37,863
But I'm gonna have to say, "Oh, no!"
278
00:11:37,947 --> 00:11:40,241
You think I need your pity,
you little bitches?
279
00:11:40,324 --> 00:11:41,325
[Terry] I'm a little bitch?
280
00:11:41,409 --> 00:11:44,036
You're the one who offered to blow
Eric Stonestreet for an eight ball.
281
00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:45,705
[friend] So what if I did?
282
00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:48,749
It's a-me, I'm a fucking a-movie star now!
283
00:11:48,833 --> 00:11:50,167
- [Terry] You begged him!
- [Pupa gasps]
284
00:11:50,251 --> 00:11:52,294
[Korvo] Calm down, Terrance,
let him express his feelings.
285
00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:54,004
[friend] I don't wanna be here!
286
00:11:54,088 --> 00:11:57,049
The Last of Us people don't have
to put up with this shit.
287
00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:59,135
[Jesse] The Last of Us guys
didn't drive their Kart
288
00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:01,804
off the PCH hopped up on PCP.
289
00:12:02,596 --> 00:12:03,848
[Sofia hammering]
290
00:12:05,391 --> 00:12:06,684
What were you thinking?
291
00:12:06,767 --> 00:12:08,185
Can we talk about this later?
292
00:12:08,269 --> 00:12:11,105
That bounty hunter's still out there.
We gotta get going.
293
00:12:11,188 --> 00:12:13,816
Get going where exactly?
You tossed all the food!
294
00:12:13,899 --> 00:12:15,860
Okay, I know it seems bad.
295
00:12:15,943 --> 00:12:17,403
All we have is an empty cart!
296
00:12:17,486 --> 00:12:19,196
I'm never gonna be able to clear my debt.
297
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:20,406
Yes, you will.
298
00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:21,574
This isn't DoorDash.
299
00:12:21,657 --> 00:12:23,325
When you get paid to transport food,
300
00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:25,536
you don't get paid without the food!
301
00:12:25,619 --> 00:12:27,288
We weren't transporting food!
302
00:12:27,371 --> 00:12:30,082
Oh, I'm sorry,
then what were we doing?
303
00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:31,584
We're hauling this.
304
00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,795
[♪ intense dramatic music playing]
305
00:12:34,879 --> 00:12:36,714
That's the real payload.
306
00:12:36,797 --> 00:12:38,632
A stupid metal wheel?
307
00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:40,760
It's a valve for a water spigot.
308
00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:44,430
We can use it to turn
the sprinklers back on.
309
00:12:44,513 --> 00:12:45,514
Crops will grow again.
310
00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:48,309
Everyone will have
all the fruit they want.
311
00:12:48,392 --> 00:12:50,394
- So you lied to me?
- I had to.
312
00:12:50,895 --> 00:12:53,814
The grass, everything is dying.
313
00:12:54,315 --> 00:12:56,817
Someone turned the sprinklers off.
314
00:12:57,276 --> 00:13:00,488
They were trying to take
all the power and control the yard.
315
00:13:00,571 --> 00:13:02,740
If they knew we had this...
316
00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:05,618
That bounty hunter
isn't even after me.
317
00:13:06,035 --> 00:13:07,578
He's after this fuckin' valve.
318
00:13:07,661 --> 00:13:10,498
Okay, technically, yes,
but I had no choice.
319
00:13:10,581 --> 00:13:13,334
Look, all you have to do
is deliver this spigot to our contact
320
00:13:13,417 --> 00:13:15,503
and you will get your Yardbucks.
321
00:13:15,586 --> 00:13:16,921
This is exactly the type of
322
00:13:17,004 --> 00:13:20,424
Tim and Sisto political bullshit
I will not be part of.
323
00:13:20,508 --> 00:13:22,885
Controlling water isn't political.
324
00:13:22,968 --> 00:13:25,262
What? [sputters]
Haven't you seen Chinatown?
325
00:13:25,346 --> 00:13:27,348
I only watch movies on Disney Plus!
326
00:13:27,431 --> 00:13:29,683
Yeah, well, that's pretty fuckin' clear.
327
00:13:30,726 --> 00:13:31,852
What are you doing?
328
00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:34,855
If you leave now,
you, you, you won't get paid!
329
00:13:35,189 --> 00:13:36,690
Ah, what good's money
330
00:13:36,774 --> 00:13:40,653
if I get killed by some Back Yard Duke
before I can spend it?
331
00:13:41,195 --> 00:13:43,864
Come on, Hedgey,
let's leave this liar liar
332
00:13:43,948 --> 00:13:45,783
before her pants catch on fire.
333
00:13:45,866 --> 00:13:47,618
[♪ poignant music playing]
334
00:13:47,701 --> 00:13:49,245
Fine, leave!
335
00:13:49,328 --> 00:13:52,373
I don't need you. I'll do it myself!
336
00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:56,836
Stupid Gavin.
337
00:13:56,919 --> 00:13:58,379
Stupid jerk.
338
00:13:58,462 --> 00:14:00,464
Doesn't even wanna save the Back Yard.
339
00:14:00,548 --> 00:14:01,841
[panting]
340
00:14:01,924 --> 00:14:03,467
- Asshole!
- [grass rustling]
341
00:14:04,051 --> 00:14:06,679
[♪ suspenseful Western music playing]
342
00:14:09,181 --> 00:14:10,391
[lizard growling]
343
00:14:10,474 --> 00:14:11,725
You.
344
00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:13,060
[lizard snarls]
345
00:14:17,064 --> 00:14:19,066
You killed my uncle!
346
00:14:19,149 --> 00:14:20,276
[shouts]
347
00:14:20,359 --> 00:14:21,861
[Sofia screams]
348
00:14:24,071 --> 00:14:25,781
[Korvo] Look, we just wanna
see you get off the streets
349
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,032
and back to the Mushroom Kingdom.
350
00:14:27,116 --> 00:14:28,492
[Yumyulack]
No more tennis, no more golf,
351
00:14:28,576 --> 00:14:30,077
no more superstar sagas.
352
00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:31,996
[friend] Oh, come on.
353
00:14:32,079 --> 00:14:34,790
[Jesse] Please go to rehab.
You know it's the right thing to do.
354
00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:36,959
- [Terry] Let us love you.
- [Yumyulack] Please!
355
00:14:37,042 --> 00:14:38,544
[Jesse] Can you get me
a meeting with Toad?
356
00:14:38,627 --> 00:14:42,464
[friend]
Oh, God, I'm a big piece of shit!
357
00:14:43,215 --> 00:14:45,134
I'm-a so sorry, you guys.
358
00:14:45,467 --> 00:14:48,679
I just wanna kill turtles
and go on odysseys, you know?
359
00:14:49,179 --> 00:14:51,515
{\an8}I'm so sick of shooting up
in the bathroom
360
00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:53,058
of a Long John Silver's
361
00:14:53,142 --> 00:14:56,437
with the fighters from
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation!
362
00:14:56,520 --> 00:14:57,938
- [crying]
- [Miss Thing snarls]
363
00:14:58,022 --> 00:14:59,398
- Shh.
- [Korvo] What the hell was that?
364
00:15:00,608 --> 00:15:02,401
Huh. It's probably not important
to the story.
365
00:15:02,484 --> 00:15:05,279
[Terry] Huh, I guess
it was just our imagination.
366
00:15:05,362 --> 00:15:06,697
[friend] [sniffles]
Thank you, guys.
367
00:15:06,780 --> 00:15:09,074
I was so close to game over,
368
00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:11,201
but now it feels like I have hope.
369
00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:12,745
[guest]
Birdo, Birdo, Birdo!
370
00:15:12,828 --> 00:15:14,914
[Terry]
Jesus Christ, this isn't about you.
371
00:15:14,997 --> 00:15:16,749
- [JK Sevens whirring]
- Mmm.
372
00:15:23,130 --> 00:15:24,214
[Hedgey groans]
373
00:15:24,298 --> 00:15:25,799
What's the matter, H?
374
00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:28,385
You can't still be hungry
after that double helping of mealworms.
375
00:15:29,178 --> 00:15:31,805
No, no, do not give me that look.
376
00:15:32,806 --> 00:15:35,017
Yeah, I know, I-I was starting
to like her too,
377
00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:36,769
even though she said I dress "daggy,"
378
00:15:36,852 --> 00:15:38,479
whatever that means.
379
00:15:38,854 --> 00:15:40,481
Hey, hey, come on, stop!
380
00:15:40,564 --> 00:15:42,066
I'm in charge here!
381
00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:45,819
[Gavin shouts]
382
00:15:46,987 --> 00:15:49,114
Fine, we can go back.
383
00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:51,909
Once we know she's safe, though,
we are gone for good.
384
00:15:51,992 --> 00:15:53,327
- [Hedgey purring]
- Alright.
385
00:15:53,410 --> 00:15:55,120
Okay then, if we're doing this,
let's hurry up.
386
00:15:55,537 --> 00:15:56,580
Hyah!
387
00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:01,043
I think we really got through to him.
388
00:16:01,126 --> 00:16:02,544
Eh, he won't last the month.
389
00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:04,463
The Thanksgiving Day Parade's
right around the corner,
390
00:16:04,546 --> 00:16:06,674
and you know how he gets
around the Rockettes.
391
00:16:06,757 --> 00:16:09,885
Okay, I wonder what kind of shit show
we're walking into down here.
392
00:16:09,969 --> 00:16:12,012
[director] [on screen] Four donkeys died
during the production.
393
00:16:12,096 --> 00:16:14,974
The stage lights were just
too hot for the little guys.
394
00:16:15,057 --> 00:16:17,351
We are very proud of you two.
395
00:16:17,434 --> 00:16:20,187
You went the whole day
without fighting, good job.
396
00:16:20,270 --> 00:16:22,272
Go upstairs
and get your puffy coats,
397
00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:24,024
we're going to Au Bon Pain!
398
00:16:24,108 --> 00:16:25,192
- Yay!
- [JK Sevens beeping]
399
00:16:32,032 --> 00:16:33,784
I need a fuckin' smoke.
400
00:16:34,702 --> 00:16:36,120
They only had Camel Crushes.
401
00:16:36,203 --> 00:16:37,955
Gross. Hand them over.
402
00:16:39,039 --> 00:16:40,916
Terry, you brilliant son of a bitch.
403
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:42,835
I can't believe your plan worked.
404
00:16:42,918 --> 00:16:45,170
Pretending to get
our friend hooked on heroin
405
00:16:45,254 --> 00:16:46,714
so we can have an intervention excuse
406
00:16:46,797 --> 00:16:48,841
to lock the Pupa
and JK Sevens down here...
407
00:16:48,924 --> 00:16:52,094
So they would work together
and become friends!
408
00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:54,388
- "Pretending"?
- Either way, I'm impressed.
409
00:16:54,471 --> 00:16:55,848
It's called parenting, honey.
410
00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:57,016
Top work, Miss Thing.
411
00:16:57,099 --> 00:16:58,767
Looking forward to working together again.
412
00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:00,436
[together]
Miss Thing, Miss Thing,
413
00:17:00,519 --> 00:17:01,520
- Miss Thing!
- Alright!
414
00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:02,730
- Yeah!
- You go, girl!
415
00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:05,566
Little one hit me with
a container of laundry detergent.
416
00:17:05,649 --> 00:17:06,775
Here's an extra 20.
417
00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:09,570
You're free to head out into the world
and spread like a virus or whatever.
418
00:17:09,653 --> 00:17:11,071
We don't really care
what you do to humans.
419
00:17:11,155 --> 00:17:12,865
Well, here's a tip, don't do drugs.
420
00:17:12,948 --> 00:17:16,368
- [Solars laughing]
- [Miss Thing coughs]
421
00:17:21,206 --> 00:17:22,958
[sniffing]
422
00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:25,711
Huh. It looks like she stopped here
and went off-road.
423
00:17:25,794 --> 00:17:27,838
- [Hedgey squeaks]
- What is it, bud?
424
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:31,425
[♪ somber music playing]
425
00:17:33,010 --> 00:17:34,011
Oh...
426
00:17:34,970 --> 00:17:37,473
Lizard tracks, dammit!
427
00:17:38,599 --> 00:17:41,602
[♪ epic music playing]
428
00:17:43,687 --> 00:17:46,690
Oh, why did it have
to be Basketballburgh?
429
00:17:47,691 --> 00:17:51,236
There's two dozen bastards down there
who'd love to see me dead.
430
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:52,571
[Hedgey squeaks]
431
00:17:52,654 --> 00:17:54,239
Yeah, I know.
432
00:17:54,323 --> 00:17:57,076
As usual, I don't have a choice.
433
00:17:57,159 --> 00:17:58,160
Hyah!
434
00:17:58,577 --> 00:18:01,747
I'll bet you 10 Yardbucks
I won't gamble, okay?
435
00:18:05,626 --> 00:18:08,712
[♪ eerie music playing]
436
00:18:08,796 --> 00:18:10,005
[gasps]
437
00:18:13,634 --> 00:18:14,968
What the hell?
438
00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:25,354
{\an8}[gasps] The rollercoaster!
439
00:18:26,396 --> 00:18:28,524
Wow, it's so green.
440
00:18:29,066 --> 00:18:31,401
Well done, Little Richard, really.
441
00:18:31,485 --> 00:18:33,612
Tip-top work.
Here's your Yardbucks.
442
00:18:33,695 --> 00:18:35,864
Treat your wife to a nice meal, on me.
443
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:38,700
We're all the same size.
That name doesn't make any sense.
444
00:18:38,784 --> 00:18:40,744
It's because I have a tiny dick!
445
00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:41,995
Happy?
446
00:18:42,913 --> 00:18:44,832
Wait, I know you.
447
00:18:44,915 --> 00:18:47,668
You used to be the head
of the Wall Council.
448
00:18:47,751 --> 00:18:49,503
You were one of the good guys.
449
00:18:49,586 --> 00:18:52,005
I still am a good guy.
450
00:18:52,089 --> 00:18:55,676
I can't thank you enough for guarding this
as you crossed the Yard.
451
00:18:55,759 --> 00:18:58,011
Now, with all the spigots,
452
00:18:58,095 --> 00:19:01,098
I can control all the water
453
00:19:01,181 --> 00:19:05,602
as far as the tiny eye can see!
454
00:19:05,686 --> 00:19:07,855
[laughs evilly]
455
00:19:07,938 --> 00:19:11,900
Dammit, I bet this is just like Chinatown.
456
00:19:11,984 --> 00:19:14,862
[evil laughter continues]
457
00:19:18,949 --> 00:19:21,952
[♪ dramatic theme playing]
458
00:19:44,099 --> 00:19:47,102
♪
459
00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:04,828
[mimicking laser fire]