Did you choose to do this on your own free will? Yeah.
SHE GROANS
DAVE: Now, put it in her mouth.
Nads, can you see if Caroll's about?
Sorry. No, no, it's not your fault, love. Are you all right?
Are you all right? Do you wanna work?
No, no, it's fine, it happens all the time.
Dave, I'm losing it, mate.
She's fine, she says it happens all the time.
Did you get it on camera?
Not on close-up. Should I?
If she's OK, obviously.
Obviously.
Hey, babes, do you feel like going on for half an hour?
I can get you to the hospital in ten minutes.
If you wanted to stay a bit longer I can give you another grand for it.
Eh...
Oh, look... Yeah, yeah, OK.
Yeah? OK.
Makeup, on set.
Jolene gave me earache about it being her first day, so, eh...
Yeah, I know, I got ya.
Did you tell her about Tom?
Yeah, she's making a meal of it.
Course she is, bloody drama queen.
How was she this morning? Late. Pissed.
Her arse is sagging. Oh, it's all saggy, mate.
Get Rich to have a word. He's never gonna say anything.
You don't bite the minge that feeds.
Hey, turn that off, Nads. For fuck sake, turn it off.
Told you, nothing happened.
Baby...
You just watched the same footage that we did.
I mean, any reasonable viewer's gonna conclude there was negligence,
that Caroll didn't discharge the duty of care expected of him.
Yeah, but SHE said she was fine.
Well, if my child insists it's fine to eat cigarettes for breakfast,
does that mean I should let them?!
You can't submit this anyway, so it's a waste of time.
We don't know that. I mean, it's late, but if we seek permission...
You can't submit it, because if you do, you're gonna destroy her.
If you're scared about whistleblowing...
That's not what she's scared of, is it?
You faked your test.
Sorry, what?
During the ID checks, you put your finger over the STI test, yeah?
What did you have?
Sorry, can we just...?
I mean, it's late, but we can try... No, I'll tell you.
But you can't submit it, you have to promise me.
Well, I don't think we can... Fine. Hayley!
Promise on your kids' lives.
I promise on my kids' lives.
What did you have?
I had gonorrhoea.
It wasn't the bad kind. Oh, it was the good kind of gonorrhoea, was it?
The kind that's going round that lowers your blood pressure
and makes your farts smell like pumpkin spice,
that I shot with you that day? Yeah, but it was only in my arse.
Oh, that's OK then, isn't it?!
I fucking put my hand in a blender for you!
I never asked you to! You acted like a little girl!
You told me you'd never done any of this before!
Yeah, well, I lied. Why?!
Cos I wanted you to like me.
Sorry, what are we doing here?
Submit it. No, no, no, no, no, no!
You cannot submit that, you promised!
I lied. And I don't give a shit if you like me or not.
ALARM CLOCK BEEPS
♪ Look at him politic Wants to his brains out
♪ He's still conservative when the blood leaks out
♪ Chapman and Lennon On the side street talking
♪ Next thing your hear is a bang spreading over
♪ You love me, you love me And now you wanna kill me... ♪
PHOTOGRAPHERS SHOUT
Don't you like them? I dunno why you wore them if you can't walk in them.
PHOTOGRAPHERS SHOUT
Oi! Watch the fucking Choos!
Jolene, why have you chosen this moment to return to porn?
What? I haven't!
What was he on about? I don't know. Tell me.
It's nothing, it's silly.
I didn't wanna burden you with it today.
What?
WOMAN GROANS
That is not me!
That is fake! Who's done that?
Rumpelstiltscock74.
Oh, Jesus. Don't let it throw you.
Oh, OK!
May it please the court, I appear on behalf of Mr Caroll Quinn.
It cannot be denied that Mr Quinn works in an industry
perceived as morally circumspect,
but over a 30-year career he has conducted himself
with integrity, propriety, and decency.
The outrageous defamatory claims made by Miss Burrows,
that Mr Quinn has been guilty of gross negligence,
and allowed criminal acts to occur on his sets,
have severely damaged his reputation and his earning potential.
And they are not only wrong, they are maliciously, knowingly wrong.
They are nothing more than the spiteful act
of a damaged, emotional, angry woman,
with a history of substance abuse,
and a dangerously incoherent understanding
of the difference between the real and the fake.
And that, My Lady, is what will be
proved to you beyond doubt in this court.
You OK? Mm. Feels OK, doesn't it?
I mean, the judge, she seems quite sympathetic. Yeah, well...yeah.
So, do you show the tape tomorrow?
Yeah.
You did well today, yeah?
You look after yourself tonight.
Get Rich to take Izzy. Have a bath. Early night. Self care.
Not so much coffee tomorrow, yeah?
SHE EXHALES SHARPLY Goodnight.
See ya.
TICKET MACHINE CLICKS
Oh, hey.
Do you have, like, a pound coin? The card reader isn't...
Yeah, don't worry about it.
You see how many hits that clip of us got? Like, 40,000. It's not us.
Those numbers are impressive though, right?
You know...
..there's a chunk of change to be made here.
Think about it.
A fake version gets that much traffic?
The real version, we'd fucking break the internet.
Are you fucking high right now?
Look, I get it, you think I'm Darth Vader or whatever,
but I'm not interested in punishing you.
I just hate leaving a dollar on the ground
for someone else to pick up, so...
I mean, it's one day's work...
I don't know how to say it any clearer.
I'm not performing anymore.
If I did, I don't do anal.
And if I did do anal, I would much rather do it
with Saddam Hussein's pickled dick than with you.
Can we drop the pissy talk? I'm actually trying to do you a favour.
If you lose this thing, they are gonna strip you for parts.
OK, cheers, bye-bye.
This asshole of yours, how comes it's so special?
Is it gold-plated? Does it play the piano?
Does it speak German?
If you've come about the slow cooker, it went this morning.
Actually, I'm here to see Phoebe.
It's the final day of trial tomorrow. I'd like you to be there.
I think I'm all right, thanks.
Look, I get it.
She's a lot.
And I'm not related to her.
But you know, everything she's done,
she's done it for you and Izzy and Gabe.
SHE LAUGHS No. This is...
Do you not get it yet?
She likes it.
She always acts like this is some big sacrifice for us,
it's bullshit, all she cares about is being fuckable.
It's like literally her entire personality.
I'm not talking about porn, I'm talking about the trial.
The whole world wants her to shut up, and she won't.
Yeah, because she's stubborn, and she's proud,
but most of all cos she's bearing witness to something wrong.
Something it would be a lot easier for her to ignore.
And that's brave. And it's lonely.
And she deserves a lot better than your lazy, teenage contempt.
Please...come tomorrow.
I'll pay your travel if it helps.
Why are you so bothered?
Cos I don't think she can win this.
And I've only got one thing left
to try to stop it completely bankrupting her.
And I think she's gonna hate me for it.
So whatever happens, I really don't want her going home on her own.
Are you scared, Mum?
No, darling.
FAINT VOICES
DISTANT SINGING
FUNKY MUSIC
♪ I ain't nothing but a hey, hey Ain't nothing but a... ♪
ALL MOAN
MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY Ms Burrows?
So, regarding the incident with Girl X,
you hold that his behaviour that day on set
was not in line with the duty of care expected of him,
and he didn't act appropriately once the prolapse had been witnessed?
Yes. And Girl X told you specifically
that she'd not had anal sex before?
Well, she was lying, wasn't she? Why do you think that was?
Cos she's a liar.
Sorry, are we gonna show the tape?
Just cos... But you feel that she was failed by Mr Quinn? I do, yeah.
Because what happened, she didn't consent to that,
and it is all on the tape, so...
My Lady, I must object to this line of questioning.
The evidence shows that Girl X consented repeatedly.
My Lady, in this country, you can't consent to acts
that cause bodily harm upon yourself,
so I put it that even if Girl X had consented to continue
after the prolapse, her consent isn't valid,
and Mr Quinn therefore allowed criminal acts to occur on his set.
It's a relevant line of questioning, I will allow it. Thank you, My Lady.
SHE CLEARS THROAT Miss Burrows,
can you tell My Lady how it felt when you found out
that your trusted employer, your good friend, Mr Quinn,
was planning to work with a performer called Tom Pain?
A performer that he was aware had previously raped you?
SHE LAUGHS
Sorry, what...? I don't... How did it feel, Miss Burrows?
Sor...
Sorry... SHE CLEARS THROAT
I wasn't raped. But there was an incident in 2010,
where Mr Pain had sex with you without your consent.
Yes. Yes.
Which, legally, we term rape.
My Lady, this evidence has not been submitted,
furthermore it is slanderous.
Mr Pain is not on trial here today,
these are allegations of criminality
that cannot be addressed by this court.
Let me rephrase that.
You told Mr Quinn about an uncomfortable encounter
with Mr Pain, is that right?
Objection!
Miss Burrows, you are objecting to your own counsel? Right.
And...am I not allowed to do that?
SHE CHUCKLES I would allow it,
but I wouldn't advise it.
Take it back. Withdrawn, whatever.
Nevertheless, Miss Maitland,
I cannot see where this is taking you.
My Lady, this goes to the heart of my client's case.
I am attempting to substantiate the truth
in the allegations of gross negligence against Mr Quinn.
Well, here we see that Mr Quinn knew that Mr Pain
was a violent attacker, and yet he was willing to allow him
to work with other performers,
in a gross negligence of duty of care to those performers.
The same lack of diligence that he showed to Girl
X on the day already discussed here.
When you told Mr Quinn about this encounter, you were upset, yes?
Please, I don't, I don't want...
This won't take long.
You were upset, yes?
Yes. Please stop...
You felt powerless. Overpowered.
In danger, in a man's home, a man that's stronger than you,
and he's more powerful than you. Yes.
And Mr Quinn, he comforted you on that occasion, what did he say?
You don't remember what he said?
He didn't say, "What a bastard"?
He didn't say, "I'm so sorry that happened to you"?
My Lady, this is impermissible.
This is an entirely fresh allegation which has never been raised before.
My Lady, I am allowed to raise matters
that have come to my attention since the statements were filed.
Is that what he said, Miss Burrows?
Miss Burrows, is that what he said? Yes.
So can you kindly address Her Ladyship, and tell her how it felt,
ten years later, on the day that you learned Mr Quinn
wasn't only endorsing this man, working with this man,
he was throwing a party for him,
he was gathering all your friends and colleagues together,
to raise a glass to the man who raped you?
I must again object in the strongest possible terms. This is an ambush.
Miss Maitland, this is scandalous.
Let me rephrase that. How did you feel when you found out
that the employer you trusted, and the friend you relied on,
was putting other woman in direct contact with a person
that you had reason to believe would physically harm them,
on the basis of your own experience and victimisation?
Angry?
Betrayed?
Frightened?
Yes!
No further questions, My Lady.
I must excoriate Miss Maitland on a wholly improper line of questioning.
For the purpose of the record, the counsel for defence
made unsubstantiated and scurrilous allegations against a third party.
Miss Nagle, your witness.
Sorry... SHE CLEARS THROAT
I'm so sorry, can I just pop to the toilet?
I will rise until 11:30.
SHE SOBS
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
I would like to thank Miss Nagle and Miss Maitland for their assistance,
I will reserve my judgment,
I'll endeavour to provide a written judgment by the end of next term.
I'll provide my judgment in draft to counsel in advance of hand-down.
CLERK: Court rise.
I'm sorry.
They wouldn't let me submit the tape so late in the day. I tried.
Hayley. Hayley! You're not gonna win this.
I'm just trying to make sure
you're only gonna lose one kidney and not two.
Yeah, well, you had no right!
No right!
You don't get to decide what I call what happened to me!
Because it wasn't rape.
What you did to me in there? That was rape!
Sas, can I grab you a second?
Uh, so this is kind of awkward, but SpankLife have got,
like, a really strict STI policy,
and Ramon's been sent this email,
it makes me feel kinda weird, I'm sure it's gossip, but...
It's not gossip.
Oh. I failed a test six months ago. I had gonorrhoea, it's been treated,
the test I have today is valid, I am fine to shoot.
OK, just... I think it's still...
..I think it's probably still a no.
MOBILE PHONE BUZZES
Hey.
RICH: Hey. You gonna text me, like, when to drop Izz back?
Yeah, erm...
Can I leave her with you a little bit longer, please? I just, erm...
..I can't do it.
I don't know how to be near them without harming them.
Yeah... HE CLEARS THROAT
No worries, you, erm...
..you do what you gotta do.
Can I speak to Gabe?
Yeah, yeah. Gimme a sec.
FAINT CONVERSATION
GABE: I don't want to.
Come on. No!
Erm, yeah, he's just having his bath.
All right, babe.
I'm here to see Mr Sokolov.
Certainly, madam. Mr Sokolov is now in room 106.
The elevator's to your left.
I apologise.
This is shitty 2009 vintage.
Usual, I drink only 2006.
SHE GASPS Thank you!
The boots OK?
Yeah.
I like only these boots.
MUSIC PLAYS ON STEREO
MUSIC VOLUME INCREASES
REMOTE BEEPS
Lay down, please.
You look at the stars,
then I fuck you in the mouth.
Keep having these dreams about Rich.
Waking up at 4:30 every day, it's doing my head in. Drinker's dawn.
Come to a meeting if you want. Leave off, Mum.
You staying for tea?
It's fishcakes.
Meat-free Wednesdays.
She's living here, ain't she?
She's moved out, and I've not noticed. Is that what's happened?
She's had an offer for next year.
Horticultural college.
Gardening? Permaculture.
She turned it down.
Why? Ask her.
Nan told me about your offer.
SHE SCOFFS Oh, what?
I told her! Why?
Why? Can't afford it, can we?
D'you wanna go?
I wanna live at my nan's and work in Londis forever.
If you wanna go, you should go.
What about the money?
I'll find the money.
Baby, I can find you the money, OK?
♪ I remember it all very well looking back
♪ It was the summer I turned 18
♪ We lived in a one-room rundown shack
♪ On the outskirts of New Orleans... ♪
Thank you very much. Thank you.
♪ We didn't have money for food or rent
♪ Several weeks we were hard pressed
♪ Then Mama spent every last penny we had to buy me a dancin' dress
♪ Mama washed and combed and curled my hair
♪ And she painted my eyes and lips
♪ And then I stepped into a satin dancin' dress
♪ That had a split on the side clean up to my hip
♪ It was red velvet trimming And it fit me good
♪ Standing back from the looking glass there stood a woman... ♪
I'm here to see Mr Taylor.
Room 18, top of the stairs, lift's out of service.
Hey, can I come in?
♪ Here's your one chance Fancy, don't let me down... ♪
Wow. It's a party.
Yeah. Let me.
D'you mind if I just use the little girls room?
♪ What else should I be?
♪ All apologies
♪ What else should I say... ♪
GROANING AND SHOUTING ON VIDEO
♪ Everyone is gay
♪ What else could I write... ♪
SHE GAGS
♪ I don't have the right
♪ What else should I be... ♪
MOBILE BUZZES # All apologies... ♪
SHE GROANS
♪ In the sun
♪ In the sun I feel as one
♪ In the sun
♪ In the sun... ♪
Hello? STELLA: Hey, I've got news.
Yep.
I'm so sorry.
The judge found in their favour.
All right.
I'm sorry, Hayley, I should have delayed it...
No, it's not your fault.
They've given us a date.
All right. And that's the cutting room, is it? Yeah.
When's that?
Next week, but you don't have to come.
No, I wanna be there.
Well, it's Thursday. I'll email you, yeah?
All right.
Bye.
SHE SOBS
♪ Easily amused
♪ Find my nest of salt
♪ Everything's my fault... ♪
SHE GAGS
♪ I'll take all the blame
♪ Aqua seafoam shame
♪ Sunburn, freezer burn
♪ Choking on the ashes of her enemy
♪ In the sun
♪ In the sun I feel as one
♪ In the sun In the sun... ♪
SHE SCREAMS
♪ Buried
♪ All in all is all we all are
♪ All in all is all we all are... ♪
VOICEMAIL: Hey, Jo, it's me, Sabelle. Thanks for your email.
Been thinking about you, too, so...
Like, if you wanted to get a coffee, we should, we should do that.
By the way, did you hear what happened to Amy?
So, what happened?
I was climbing out of a bathroom window.
OK, fine, whatever. It's just that I heard that you were escorting,
and I didn't realise you were doing that.
It's the same as porn.
It's the same as anything.
You just have to work out what people want and give it to them.
Most people have already decided what they want.
Some people...
..it's really easy, they tell you.
I'm a mum.
Who are you?
Honestly, I look at you, and I don't know
if you need a cuddle or an exorcism.
OK, fine.
I just wanted to say this.
What happened to you, that doesn't just happen.
That is years of abuse.
And maybe it was voluntary, or maybe it wasn't,
I don't know, or maybe, more likely, it was somewhere inbetween.
You, just being a person that somebody else wanted you to be.
Maybe it even happened in this house, but either way,
I think it's fucked you up a little bit, love.
And if you want me to help you with that, I will.
I'll do whatever you want, to help you with that.
This is your last chance...
..cos after I walk out that door I never wanna see you again.
And I know that you think you're fine right now, and maybe you are,
maybe it doesn't even touch the sides, but...
..in ten years' time you are gonna wake up,
and you are gonna be so angry it's not even true.
You would not believe the rage that is gonna come out of you.
And when that happens...
..it is gonna make you so, so ugly.
Trust me.
SHE SIGHS
Did you see my bag?
Mm.
Yeah, it's lovely.
Ostrich skin, is it? Yeah.
Gorgeous.
Oh! You gave me a fright.
Erm, Mike's just mulching.
Mike? Mike?
Er, did you want tea, Hayley? Coffee?
Eh, there's cake, but I'm not very pleased with it. Oh, no, thank you.
Your house is, like, so lovely.
Ah, it all needs re-doing!
We're ripping the kitchen out.
Uh, this is Hayley, uh, Ellie's friend from the salon.
Hello, uh, uh...Mike. HE CHUCKLES
Have we met before? You're very familiar to me.
Yeah, I get that a lot! SHE LAUGHS
All right? All right.
In the light of everything Miss Burrows has gone through,
I'm only awarding 60% of costs.
I have a note here that Mr Quinn
does not wish to collect damages, is that...? That's correct.
We will still be seeking legal fees.
All right.
Then costs are set at £40,000.
My Lady, my client is currently unemployed.
We will need a long-term payment plan.
Miss Burrows own a property that could be sold to finance the costs.
My Lady, that's a family home, my client has three children...
All of whom live away from home or with their father.
No, that's temporary. That's just temporary.
That's correct, isn't it, Counsel?
Miss Burrows' children do not reside with her. I'm their mum.
I'm their mum!
My recommendation would be for the defendant to pay within 28 days,
with the ability to apply for an assessment of her financial means.
D'you wanna get a drink?
Eh, I try not to...
I've knocked it on the head at the minute, actually, so...
Wow.
That's... Wow.
Yeah, well, if I'm gonna be in a room with Tom Pain again
then I wanna be in control.
Hayley, no, that isn't the only option.
No, no, the other option is I sell my house,
um, I never go shopping again not looking for yellow stickers,
and I have a panic attack every time I have to call a plumber out.
That's insane!
Go back to the coffee shop. Sell your house. Who gives a shit?
I do!
I love that house.
My kids love that house.
It's just stuff!
When I was Izzy's age,
I never thought I'd get to live in a house as nice as that.
In what world is it worse losing your bloody house
than doing that with him?
In mine. In my world.
I've been working my arse off for you,
trying to get you out of this, so that you've got choices!
This is a choice!
I really wanna hit you!
Yeah, well, that's because you don't feel sorry for me anymore, isn't it?
And you can't save me, and you can't control me,
so you don't know what to do with me, do you?
So fuck off, go on.
Don't. Don't do that.
I'm not your fucking puppet.
Honestly, I would rather have
Tom Pain's dick up my arse than your hand.
I think you're lying to yourself.
We're all lying to ourselves, Stella.
Who goes to their job because they like it?
I do.
Well, you're a lucky cow, then, ain't ya?
Stella...
MEN LAUGH AND SHOUT
One for the road.
It's like kissing Hitler.
MAN: Oi! Darling!
Flick your bean for me, yeah?
Oi, mate, why don't you go buy some flowers,
take yourself for dinner, and go fuck yourself, yeah?
ALERTS BEEP
♪ When I stole a twig from our little nest
♪ And gave it to a bird with nothing in her beak... ♪
ALERTS BEEP
♪ And twisted around for a whole fucking week
♪ Why d'ya do it, she said
♪ Why d'ya let that trash... ♪
MOBILE BUZZES
TOM: You know it's considered polite to ask the gentleman
before you tell the world he's gonna fuck you?
Is that a yes?
It's not a no.
Where? Here.
I choose the director, 30/70 profit share, my favour.
40/60.
35/65. Je-sus!
Fine.
I wonder what could have changed your mind.
I just hate leaving a dollar on the ground for someone else to pick up.
Well, you need a lot of dollars, so...
Actually...
..I've been doing a lot of thinking, and, erm...
..oh, God, this is really hard for me to say, but,
I think...
..I think I'm in love with you.
A little advice for you, sweetheart.
Do not laugh at me.
I'm doing you a huge favour.
Huge. I don't fuck MILFs. I don't like MILFs.
I don't fuck old, I don't fuck saggy, I don't fuck stretched out.
So I'm making a lot of concessions to help you out.
How many fucking kids have you had?
Stop flirting, you.
SHE GROANS
ALARM BEEPS
♪ Shall we meet on the hilltop
♪ Where the two roads meet?
♪ We will form a circle
♪ Hold our hands and chant
♪ Let the great one know
♪ What it is we want
♪ Danger is great joy
♪ Dark is bright as fire... ♪
SHE BREATHES DEEPLY
OK.
Come on, madam.
♪ Sister we are waiting
♪ Cover up in shame
♪ Fly fast through the airwaves
♪ Meet with pride and truth... ♪
SHE EXHALES SLOWLY
Hiya!
APPLAUSE Oh, I'm so sorry that I'm late.
The traffic was terrible.
Ooh!
Hello, darling.
Jolene, you know Tom?
Yeah. Right, shall we crack on?
I have had a little bit of a rewrite,
please, if you just, there you go.
OK. And what are we using for the cream pie, babe?
Uh, icing sugar and water.
Yeah, no, I'm gonna have thrush for about a month, with that.
There you go, that's pre-mixed.
Do you consent to light slapping? BOTH: Yes.
Do you consent to oral sex? BOTH: Yes.
Do you consent to vaginal sex? BOTH: Yes.
Do you consent to anal sex?
Yes.
How do you plead, Jolene Dollar? How do you plead, Jolene Dollar?
CHANGES TONE: How do you plead?
Rrrrr! How do you plead? How do you plead, Jolene Dollar?
How do you plead?
Rrrrr!
Yeah!
Rrrrrrr!
GAVEL THUMPS
OK, let's go for one.
And...action.
OK, so now we're done shooting,
do you have any second thoughts about us putting out this video?
No.
And, did you do any alcohol or drugs today
that would have affected your decision-making?
No.
You know that you could have left at any time, right?
Yeah, yes.
Did you feel pressured to answer these questions in a,
like in a way that's...to please me?
Oh, my God, no, not at all.
OK, good, good.
We put you in your place today, didn't we?
Oh, absolutely.
Loved it. Had so much fun. I came loads.
Great. Can I ask, what's your natural hair colour?
Brown.
Well, you're beautiful as a redhead.
Thank you.
You made the right decision.
Can I ask you a question?
Is your mum still alive?
Uh...
Yeah.
Yeah?
Is she...was she strict?
Did she let you get away with stuff when you was a kid?
HE SIGHS
No.
I would say Rita never let anyone get away with anything.
OK, good.
Just cos one day soon,
people are gonna see you,
and you are gonna be shamed.
I mean, you're gonna be brutally, brutally shamed.
And it's gonna be so hard,
it's gonna make you feel so lonely,
and you are gonna lose, like, everything.
And when that happens,
I honestly hope there is still a woman in the world
who will give you a kiss and tell you that you're loved.
I also hope that woman doesn't let you get away with a fucking thing.
Are we done?
Cool!
♪ A kiss away A kiss away
♪ Oh Love's just a kiss away
♪ Children Love's just a kiss away
♪ It's just a kiss away Kiss away
♪ It's just a kiss away Love's just a kiss away
♪ Love's just a kiss away... ♪
CAR HORN HONKS
I'm so sorry, Jo.
Are you all right?
Starving. D'you wanna get a pizza?
I'm on the Dukan. It's awful.
Had the steak for breakfast.
Why are you on a diet? You're a skinny minnie.
We have different standards.
Real women have curves.
Sweetheart, there is nothing real about your curves.
My arse is real.
Can you eat chicken?
So what's next?
Organic porn. Ethically produced.
The market is still unproven.
Anyone who reads the Guardian and likes wanking, that's your market.
There's lots of them.
They're very conflicted.
OK.
So...
..let me help you.
You know what really pisses me off about this whole thing?
You all acted like I'd bitten the hand that feeds me,
like for years and years you've been doing me a favour, like I need you.
And I ain't needed you since they invented the selfie stick.
But I stayed with you, because I loved you,
and I thought you loved me.
I did.
And I do love you.
Maybe.
But sooner or later it is gonna be better for you to fuck me over
than to take care of me, and that ain't love, mate, that's economics.
♪ Well, I think I'm going out of my head...
ALERT CHIMES
I'm bored! I'm bored!
It's boring!
Say, yeah, Stella, yeah!
Oh!
Oh, oh, and... Oh, oh!
Ow!
Ah-hahaha!
She's stole my act!
DOORBELL RINGS
Hi, baby!
Mwah!
I thought you must be missing him.
I am.
Of course I am, I just...
It's their age. Can't change it. Just gotta get on with it.
Right, OK, come on, mate, we talked about this.
Give your mum a hug.
It's OK, he doesn't have to.
Yes, he does.
What you doing?
Just weeding.
Go and see Nana, you two.
D'you remember what I said to you about Polly,
after what happened to you when you was asleep?
Yeah. Yeah.
Well, I've been thinking about it a lot.
Quite a lot, actually, and, erm...
..I was wrong.
And I'm so sorry about that.
I was a baby when I had you, Phoebs.
And what I do now, it isn't real.
I mean, me giving you advice about sex, right, that's like...
..it's like Ratatouille giving Mary Berry advice about cooking.
Ratatouille's a really good cook.
But he isn't real, Phoebs.
He's a cartoon.
I mean, you couldn't have a real rat in a kitchen,
not in reality, could ya?
It's like a health and safety nightmare. They piss everywhere,
d'you understand what I'm saying?
What do you want, Hayley?
I want you tell him what you told me.
OK? You do it kindly,
but you look him in the eye,
and you tell him that it wasn't OK.
Yeah, I don't wanna do that.
OK, well...
..that's fine, too.
I just thought that maybe you might miss him, or...
But if you do do it...
..the thing you have to be ready for, darling,
is that even through you think about it every single day,
he might not even remember it.
Did you do that scene?
I did, love, yeah.
Was it painful?
A bit.
D'you want a tea?
Yeah, I'd love one.
What are you doing?
I was worried about ya.
It's been a hard year, Mum.
I know, love.
Hey, guys, something really sad happened just now.
I was fucking Jolene Dollar so hard, I, like, fucked her to death.
D'you know what? I thought this was gonna be fun,
but actually it's boring.
I'm really, really bored.
The hour is finally upon us! CHEERING
Are you ready to be bored?!
Bored!
Oh, you naughty, naughty boy!
You've made a terrible mess.
Oh, but don't worry, cos Mummy's here to clean it up!
CHEERING
Giddy up, giddy up! Bored little pony.
I'm bored.
Higher, higher.
Brrr!
We love you, Jolene!
DOORBELL RINGS
Tim's gone to Tenerife, so I'm just...covering his callouts.
Oh.
Shall I take a look?
Yeah.
How long d'you think it will take?
It's hard to say.
How's Keeley?
Kelly.
Mm-hm. HE CHUCKLES
Yeah, she's, eh...
I dunno, actually. I've not really...
Hmm.
It's a bit...
Have you got a guarantee for this, do ya?
Yeah, it's in the, eh, bad drawer.
DRAWER CLATTERS This fucking thing.
DRAWER THUDS
Mm... What about the kids?
Oh, they're at Mum's. Yeah?
No, no, no, leave that on.
Yeah? SHE GIGGLES
It's actually really hard to get my trousers off.
Yeah, no, take it off.
Hello!
That's retro.
Yeah, this is just something I'm trying.
SHE GASPS
HE SIGHS
WHISPERS: Yeah.
HE MOANS
Ah...
Ah!
♪ Well, I don't like intrusions
♪ And if I had my way
♪ I'd close the door behind me
♪ And they'd all melt away
♪ I'd open up the book and
♪ Climb right out off this town
♪ If you'd let me... ♪
Subtitles by Red Bee Media