[DING]
ANY OTHER DORMICE WANT TO COME OUT TO PLAY?
HUH!
[ALL GRUNTING]
OH, OH, OH!
[SIGHS]
HEH HEH HEH.
HELLO, LITTLE FRIEND.
[ELEVATOR DINGS]
OH, MY GOD!
YOU'RE ALICE!
CORRECTION.
I WAS ALICE.
[BUZZING]
[HEART MONITOR BEEPING]
[MOANS]
WHAT IS HAPPENING?
[ALARM DINGING]
OH, MY GOD.
YOU'RE AWAKE.
HOW AM I HERE?
THE BATTEAM GOT WIND OF YOUR BREAK-IN,
FOUND YOU UNCONSCIOUS
UNDERNEATH MARQUIS' POOL TABLE.
BEAT THE GCPD BY A FEW SECONDS
AND DUMPED YOU HERE.
Y-Y-YOU WERE-- YOU WERE OUT FOR A FEW HOURS.
I DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU'D WAKE UP.
[SIGHS]
OH. ALICE, YOU OK?
ALICE?
HOW DO YOU FEEL?
I FEEL LIKE BETH AGAIN.
WOMAN: WE'VE GATHERED THIS MORNING TO DISCUSS
THE PSYCHOLOGICAL EVALUATION OF ELIZABETH MARIE KANE.
THIS IS THE CASE OF A 13-YEAR-OLD CHILD,
WHO AFTER WITNESSING THE GRISLY DECAPITATION
OF HER MOTHER WAS ABDUCTED AND HELD AGAINST HER WILL
BY A MADMAN.
AFTER ENDURING 11 YEARS OF HIS PSYCHOLOGICAL
AND PHYSICAL TORTURE, BETH ESCAPED,
WHERE SHE EVENTUALLY ENCOUNTERED A CORRUPT HYPNOTIST,
WHO COMPELLED HER TO FULLY BREAK FROM HER HUMANITY.
AS A RESULT, MS. KANE DISASSOCIATED FROM REALITY
TO BECOME A CHARACTER
NAMED ALICE.
WELL, WHEN YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT.
WOMAN: FOR THE PAST 3 WEEKS, THE GOTHAM CITY PSYCHOLOGICAL...
IS IT JUST ME, OR DID THEY MAKE
ALICE SOUND LIKE A VICTIM?
SHH. I'M LISTENING.
OUR FINDINGS INDICATE THAT AFTER EXPOSURE
TO A SINGLE ELECTRICAL CHARGE MS. KANE'S BRAIN
ESSENTIALLY REWIRED ITSELF.
THE AREA THAT HAD BEEN CUT OFF FROM LOVE AND EMPATHY
HAS BEEN RESTORED.
IT IS OUR RECOMMENDATION TO THE COURT
THAT THE CRIMINAL CHARGES ARE DROPPED
AND MS. KANE BE RELIEVED OF HER TRIAL
AS WE CAN NO LONGER DEEM HER CLINICALLY INSANE.
REPORTER: MS. KANE, WHERE DID YOU GET THIS MAGICAL BUZZER?
ALICE: RYAN, RYAN, I'M SORRY.
APOLOGIES. YOU KNEW I NEEDED THAT BUZZER FOR MARQUIS.
YOU KNEW I NEEDED IT FOR ME.
THE COURT OF PUBLIC OPINION MAY HAVE CHANGED
THEIR MIND ABOUT YOU,
BUT THAT DOESN'T CHANGE THE TRUTH.
TAKE IT. MAYBE LUKE CAN FIGURE OUT
A WAY TO MAKE IT WORK AGAIN.
IT'S FRIED, ALICE.
IT'S DEAD. YOU WON.
REPORTER: MS. KANE, HOW ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT TODAY?
-MS. KANE, WHAT'S NEXT FOR YOU? -MS. KANE...
AS MUCH AS I'D CONVINCED MYSELF YOU WERE DEAD,
YOU WERE ALWAYS THERE.
YOU JUST NEEDED TO BE FOUND.
OCEAN: I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A SUCKER
FOR A HAPPY ENDING.
OCEAN?
HOW ARE YOU-- YOU CAN'T BE HERE.
YOU MEAN... BECAUSE I'M DEAD...
BECAUSE OF YOU?
THAT'S THE THING, ALICE.
I DON'T THINK YOU DESERVE A HAPPY ENDING.
[GAGGING]
NO, NO, NO. NO.
WHAT ARE--WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
[COUGHING]
NO! NO! I'M SORRY.
I'M SORRY.
IT WASN'T MY FAULT.
I'M SORRY.
I'M S...
WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME?
[SOBBING]
WHERE IS IT?
[CRYING]
LEAVE ME ALONE!
GET AWAY FROM ME, ALICE!
GET AWAY!
[CRYING]
OH! WHAT THE?
SOMEBODY, HEL--AAH!
HOLY CRAP! YOU'RE BATWOMAN.
AND YOU'RE MARQUIS JET'S LOYAL NUMBER TWO--
IN EVERY MORNING BEFORE SUNRISE,
NEVER TAKES A SICK DAY,
KEEPER OF MARQUIS' SCHEDULE,
AND--SHALL I PRESUME-- HIS SECRETS.
HEH.
[SIGHS]
[KEYS JINGLING]
HEH HEH.
HEY.
SO. IF YOU LEAVE ME ALONE IN BED,
YOU BETTER HAVE COFFEE.
OH!
CREAM AND SUGAR, DEAR?
ALICE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE?
I HAVE PATIENTS COMING IN.
-ALICE! -WHERE'S THE...
HALOPERIDOL, THE...CHLORPROMAZINE?
THE--THE ANTIPSYCHOTICS, MAR-BEAR?
-COUGH THEM UP! -I THOUGHT YOU WERE LEAVING!
I PACKED YOU A BAG!
I GAVE YOU ENOUGH CASH TO GET HALFWAY
ACROSS THIS COUNTRY.
ALICE, THERE'S AN APB ON YOUR HEAD!
YOU CAN'T BE HERE!
I AM LOSING MY MIND!
I'M--I'M LOSING MY MIND.
THE--THE HALLUCINATIONS ARE BACK BUT WORSE,
AND I--I JUST NEED A LITTLE EDGER
UNTIL YOU CAN GET ME THE JOY BUZZER.
BUT KIKI, SHE SAID THAT THERE WAS ONLY ONE BUZZ LEFT.
EXACTLY, SO WHY ARE WE STILL STANDING HERE?
BECAUSE RYAN NEEDS IT FOR HER BROTHER.
BUT YOU NEED IT FOR YOU SISTER.
EXCEPT YOU'RE NOT MY SISTER.
WHY DIDN'T YOU STOP ME?
A REAL SISTER WOULD HAVE STOPPED ME
BEFORE I KILLED SOMEONE.
YOU THINK THIS IS MY FAULT?
THAT WAS ALL YOU...
POISON MARY.
I WAS THERE FOR YOU, MAKING SURE NO ONE
GOT IN YOUR WAY.
YOU WEREN'T THERE FOR ME.
YOU TOOK ADVANTAGE OF ME.
YOU NEEDED ME, SO YOU ENCOURAGED ME,
AND--AND NOW A WIFE IS WITHOUT HER HUSBAND
AND THEIR TWO BOYS WITHOUT THEIR DAD,
AND THEIR LIFE IS RUINED, AND MY LIFE IS RUINED!
GOT IT. I AM SO SORRY
THAT YOU GUTTED A MAN WITH A TREE BRANCH.
MY BAD!
WOULD YOU JUST GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE?
WHAT IS THIS, "GILMORE GIRLS"?
RYAN AND I HAVE SOME FAMILY MATTERS TO DISCUSS.
YOU MEAN, YOU NEED HER PROTECTION FROM MARQUIS.
NOW THAT THE EVIDENCE OF HIM KILLING HIS FATHER
HAS BEEN DESTROYED, YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING
TO HOLD OVER HIS HEAD.
RYAN'S LIFE IS COMPLICATED ENOUGH
WITHOUT YOU PLAYING MOM ALL OF A SUDDEN.
THE ONLY ONE WHO'S PLAYING HERE IS MARQUIS,
AND IF WE DON'T GET OUR HANDS ON THAT JOY BUZZER
AND USE IT ON HIM SOON,
ALL OF GOTHAM CITY COULD BECOME HIS SANDBOX.
YOU KNOW, MAYBE IF YOU HAD TREATED HIM
LIKE A CRIMINAL AND NOT YOUR PRECIOUS BABY BOY
WE WOULDN'T BE IN THIS SITUATION TO BEGIN WITH.
RYAN: MMM, MMM. JADA: DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU--
TELL ME THAT IS NOT VEGAN PUFF PASTRY.
HEY. YOU COULD HAVE WARNED ME YOUR MOM WAS COMING OVER.
AT LEAST WHEN I LIVED WITH ALICE, SHE KNOCKED.
YOUR MAMA ALMOST SAW ME NAKED.
I AM SORRY. I--I SHOULD HAVE SAID SOMETHING.
SHE WANTED TO HUDDLE SO WE CAN GAME PLAN A WAY
TO STOP MARQUIS.
JADA: WHAT'S ALL THIS?
THIS IS MARQUIS' CALENDAR.
STEP ONE--WE CAN GET A SENSE OF HIS DAY,
SO STEP TWO--WE CAN AMBUSH HIS ASS.
RYAN: HUH? SOPHIE: WHAT'S WRONG?
THERE'S NOTHING ON HIS SCHEDULE.
YEAH, BUT LOOK AT TOMORROW
AND EVERY DAY LAST WEEK.
HE'S BOOKED SOLID 9 TO 6--
MEETINGS, LUNCHES, CALLS, DRINKS.
IS THERE SOMETHING SPECIAL ABOUT TODAY?
NOT THAT I KNOW OF.
OK. HOLD ON.
WAIT.
-WHO'S BARBARA KEAN? -WHY?
HE E-MAILED MILES ASKING HIM TO FIND
HER HOME ADDRESS.
OK. BARBARA KEAN IS THE OWNER OF AN ART GALLERY
IN THE BOWERY AND JIM GORDON'S EX-WIFE.
AS IN COMMISSIONER GORDON?
YEAH. APPARENTLY, THEY USED TO DINE
WITH GOTHAM'S UPPER CRUST BUT DIVORCED
AFTER THEIR SON J.J. WAS FOUND
WITH BODY PARTS IN HIS CLOSET.
BARBARA'S REPUTATION NEVER RECOVERED.
PROBABLY FOR THE BEST.
WELL, I'M ACTUALLY LATE FOR MY 8:00,
SO I'LL GET GOING.
WAIT. WHAT HAPPENED TO FINDING MARQUIS?
WELL, I WILL KEEP AN EAR TO THE GROUND,
AND YOU'LL DO THE SAME, AND WHATEVER YOU NEED,
UH, RESOURCES, MONEY, MANPOWER,
YOU GOT IT, IT'S YOURS.
THAT WAS WEIRD, RIGHT?
-WHAT? -STAY HERE.
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
JUST GIVE ME TWO MINUTES.
I DON'T KNOW HOW HE KNOWS OR WHAT HE'S DOING,
BUT IF IT INVOLVES BARBARA, IT COULD VERY WELL INVOLVE
YOU, ME, MARIO, ALL OF US.
LET YOUR SECURITY TEAMS KNOW WE'RE NOT SAFE.
FROM WHOM? BGS?
HOW'D YOU GET DOWN HERE SO FAST?
IT'S A LESBIAN BAR. KNOW YOUR EXITS.
WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL RYAN THAT BARBARA KEAN
IS PART OF THE BLACK GLOVE SOCIETY?
THIS DOESN'T NEED TO INVOLVE RYAN.
AHH. WORRIED HER KNOWING YOU'RE STILL AFFILIATED
WITH A MURDEROUS CABAL MIGHT SCREW UP
MOTHER-DAUGHTER BONDING TIME?
DESPITE APPEARANCES, SOPHIE,
I'M TRYING TO DO WHAT'S RIGHT.
NOW EXCUSE ME BEFORE PEOPLE GET HURT.
RYAN WANTS TO TRUST YOU.
YOU'RE NOT EVEN GIVING HER A CHANCE.
IF YOU CARE ABOUT RYAN,
YOU'LL KEEP THIS TO YOURSELF.
HI. CAN I ASK YOU WHO YOU'RE HERE TO PICK UP?
WHO ARE YOU?
IS IT JADA JET?
WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME THAT?
CALL 911. YOUR BOSS WAS JUST KIDNAPPED!
OH, MY GOD!
-HI. -CAN I HELP YOU?
UM...IS YOUR MOM HOME?
MOM, DOOR!
WOMAN: NOAH, YOU'RE GONNA WAKE UP YOUR LITTLE BROTHER.
SORRY. IF YOU'RE HERE TO SELL SOMETHING, IT'S NOT A GOOD TIME.
OH, NO. I'M NOT SELLING ANYTHING.
I'M MARY HAMILTON.
I'M SORRY TO STOP BY UNANNOUNCED
WHEN YOUR FAMILY'S GOING THROUGH SUCH A DIFFICULT TIME.
YES?
I BELIEVE I HAVE INFORMATION PERTAINING
TO YOUR HUSBAND'S DEATH.
UH...
COME IN.
MOUSE: UH-OH.
LOOK WHO'S LOSING HER GRIP...
FIGURATIVELY AND LITERALLY.
HEH HEH. MY SWEET MOUSE.
NO.
DID YOU THINK THIS WAS OVER?
I...AM NOT LISTENING TO YOU.
YOU'RE NOT HERE,
AND YOU'RE NOT REAL.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE,
TRYING TO GET YOURSELF A LITTLE JOY BUZZER,
AN UNDO SWITCH?
WOULDN'T THAT BE NICE?
GET...OUT OF MY HEAD!
UNH!
YOU DIDN'T REALLY THINK YOU'D SEEN THE LAST OF ME, DID YOU?
OK. WELL, THE GOOD NEWS IS BLACK ROLLS-ROYCE
WITH CRANBERRY LEATHER INTERIOR
ARE RARE EVEN FOR RICH PEOPLE.
THIS WAS TARGETED.
HOW ELSE WOULD SOMEONE KNOW THE IDENTICAL MAKE
AND MODEL OF JADA'S CAR?
SPEAKING OF IDENTICAL,
WEREN'T YOU WEARING THAT YESTERDAY?
OH. UM... ACTUALLY, I--
HELPED ME TRACK DOWN MARQUIS' ASSISTANT ALL NIGHT.
SHE DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO GO HOME.
OH. OH, OK. GOT A HIT.
PARTIAL PLATE BELONGS TO A CAR PURCHASED
TWO DAYS AGO BY WAYNE ENTERPRISES.
MARQUIS. HE MADE HIS MOVE.
CALL ME CRAZY, BUT I THINK THIS
HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH BARBARA KEAN
AND THE BLACK GLOVE SOCIETY.
EXPLAIN IT TO ME ON THE ROAD.
LUKE, GIVE ME A TRACE ON THAT CAR.
WE NEED TO KNOW WHERE THE HELL HE'S TAKING HER ASAP.
ON IT.
MAKE ME A JOY BUZZER!
THIS CAN BE AN EXCITING TALE TO TELL THE GRANDKIDS
AROUND THE CAMPFIRE.
HA HA HA! NICE TRY,
BUT NOTHING BEATS THE ONE ABOUT THE TIME
I HELPED THE JOKER BEAT ROBIN TO DEATH WITH A CROWBAR.
HOLIDAY FAMILY CLASSIC.
SEE, THE THING IS, SWEETIE,
I ONLY HAVE THE PATIENCE TO WORK
FOR ONE PSYCHOPATH, AND UNFORTUNATELY FOR YOU,
MARQUIS JET SIGNS MY W-2s. HA HA HA!
AGH!
A LITTLE TIP ABOUT MANAGING PSYCHOPATHS.
IT'S BEST TO APPEASE THE ONE WHO HAS
THE KNIFE AT YOUR THROAT.
HEH HEH.
I'VE WORKED FOR THE JOKER SINCE I WAS 16.
YOU THINK YOU'RE THE FIRST CRAZY BLOND WOMAN
I'VE EVER DEALT WITH? HA HA!
[GUNSHOT]
SORRY ABOUT THAT. HEH.
WAY TOO MANY CRAZY PEOPLE IN THIS ROOM.
UGH. OF COURSE, IT'S IN HER POCKET.
SHE WAS MAKING SOME LAST-MINUTE TWEAKS FOR ME.
ALICE OF FREAKING WONDERLAND.
MAY I JUST SAY IT IS AN HONOR.
MARQUIS JET, I PRESUME.
IN THE FLESH. DON'T STEAL IT.
HA HA.
SO, ALICE OF FREAKING WONDERLAND,
WHAT--WHAT COULD YOU POSSIBLY WANT
WITH MY JOY BUZZER?
HERE'S THE THING. THAT HAS ONE MORE BUZZ IN IT,
AND IF YOU PLAY YOUR RAZOR-SHARP CARDS RIGHT,
IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE USED ON YOU.
OH, PRETTY PLEASE TELL ME YOU DIDN'T WANT TO
USE IT ON YOURSELF.
I MEAN, YOU'RE A LEGEND.
YOU'RE THE MENACE OF GOTHAM,
THE RINGLEADER OF RABBITS,
THE QUEEN OF HEARTLESSNESS.
LIKE YOU SAID, TOO MANY CRAZIES, TOO SMALL A SPACE.
-NOW GIVE ME-- -AH, AH, OH!
NOW THE THING IS, ALICE, YOU KNOW,
I MIGHT BE NEW TO THIS WHOLE--THE WORLD OF PUBLIC PSYCHOS,
BUT I'M NOT ABOUT TO START MY REIGN
BY LOSING ONE OF THE LEGENDS.
HA HA HA!
LET'S SEE IF I CAN'T CHANGE YOUR MIND.
HA HA HA!
[SOUND MODULATING]
HA HA! HA HA HA!
HA HA HA HA!
HA HA HA!
WHAT IN THE CULT FROM HELL?
MARQUIS: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE BLACK GLOVE SOCIETY,
THANK YOU FOR JOINING ME THIS EVENING.
NOW IN HONOR OF TRADITION,
LET US COMMENCE WITH ROLL CALL.
BARBARA KEAN?
-HERE. -OHH!
THEN WE HAVE BURTON CROWNE.
NICE 'STACHE, BRO.
NEXT, ONE OF THE BIGGEST PROFITEERS OF CRAZY,
MR. JEREMIAH ARKHAM HIMSELF.
MARIO FALCONE, WELCOME.
[GRUNTING]
AND LAST BUT CERTAINLY NOT LEAST,
THE LADY WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS FINE EVENING--
MS. JADA JET.
NOW ALLOW ME TO WELCOME YOU TO THE BLACK GLOVE SOCIETY'S
FINAL CEREMONY.
GO ON. LOOK AROUND.
THE PERSON TO YOUR RIGHT AND THE PERSON TO YOUR LEFT
ARE GOING TO DIE TONIGHT.
[HOSTAGES GRUNTING]
WE HAVING FUN YET?
SO AS I'VE RECENTLY COME TO DISCOVER,
THE BLACK GLOVE SOCIETY WAS FOUNDED
BY MARLA ELLIOT IN 1984.
HER SON TOMMY HAD THIS DEEPLY CREEPY NEED
TO BE JUST LIKE HIS BESTIE BRUCE WAYNE.
EVEN WANTED TO BE AN ORPHAN LIKE BRUCE,
WHICH MEANT HE WENT AT MOMMY WITH HER SEWING SCISSORS. OOF.
"UH-OH!" SAID MARLA ELLIOT,
HIDING HER STAB WOUNDS BEHIND HER PLASTIC SURGERY.
"I'M GOTHAM'S HIGH SOCIETY.
I CAN'T HAVE A FREAK SHOW FOR A SON."
[KISS]
"WHAT IF SOMEBODY STOPS INVITING ME
"TO LUNCHES AT THE POLO CLUB?
GUESS WE GOT TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THAT, RIGHT?"
AND THUS...
THE BLACK GLOVE SOCIETY WAS BORN.
AM I GETTING THIS RIGHT SO FAR?
NOD IF I'M CLOSE.
GOOD.
[CLACKING]
BARBARA KEAN,
NOW YOU'RE THE MOTHER OF J.J. GORDON, RIGHT?
IF I'M REMEMBERING THIS CORRECTLY,
WHEN J.J. WAS 15, HE TIED A LABRADOODLE
TO TRAIN TRACKS?
AH. THAT'S, UH-- THAT'S ROUGH, YOU KNOW,
BECAUSE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU RUN
FOR PHILANTHROPIC CHAIR, AND SOMEBODY'S LIKE,
"HEY. DIDN'T YOUR KID MURDER A FREAKING LABRADOODLE?"
SO TO HIDE AN UNSIGHTLY SCENE,
YOU HIRED SOME OFF-THE-BOOKS DOCTORS TO FILL J.J.
WITH EXPERIMENTAL MEDICATION
SO YOU COULD TRY TO FIX HIM.
PROBLEM IS--SHOCKER-- IT DIDN'T WORK.
NOW HE'S JUST A DROOLING HUSK AT ARKHAM.
JADA, WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING?
YOU NEED TO DO SOMETHING, PLEASE!
MARQUIS: OH, COME ON. DON'T FIGHT IT, BABS.
I MEAN, YOU DID USE THIS ON YOUR OWN SON,
SO HOW DANGEROUS COULD IT BE, RIGHT?
7 CLINICAL TRIALS IN ALL.
THIS DOSE CONTAINS EVERY SINGLE INGREDIENT
OF EVERY SINGLE MEDICINE YOU'VE GIVEN HIM.
[GAS HISSING]
I'M SORRY.
[WHIMPERING]
[MEN GRUNTING]
[GASPING]
SAY HI TO MARLA FOR US, WOULD YOU?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU KNOW, I BET YOU HE'D LET YOU KILL A FEW OF THEM.
MARQUIS: MARIO FALCONE.
HE SEEMS TO REALLY LIKE YOU.
-I'M GOOD, THANKS. -YOU SURE?
ISN'T THIS SORT OF THING KIND OF LIKE YOUR SUPER BOWL?
REVENGE, FLAIR,
A FUN, LITTLE WHEEL TO MAKE IT A GAME.
WHY ARE YOU HERE?
THE JOY BUZZER, ALICE.
YOU DON'T DESERVE THAT.
PLAIN AND SIMPLE.
SEE...THAT'S CONFUSING
BECAUSE YOU ARE A FIGMENT OF MY DELIRIUM,
AND I KNOW IN MY BONES
THAT I NOT ONLY DESERVE IT, I NEED IT,
SO BE GONE, SWEET MOUSE.
YOUR LOGIC DOESN'T FIT INTO MY WORKING NARRATIVE.
YOU POISONED ME.
AT OUR TEA PARTY.
YOU TAPED A LIVE RAT TO MY CHEST
TO LURE BATS TO MY FLESH.
MY BLOOD.
THAT'S WHAT YOU DID...
TO YOUR BEST FRIEND.
DO YOU THINK YOU COULD JUST WALK AWAY FROM THAT,
ERASE IT, MOVE ON?
GET AWAY FROM ME!
[GUNSHOT, THUD]
WOMAN: SO YOU SAID YOU HAD INFORMATION
ABOUT MY HUSBAND'S MURDER?
RIGHT. AHEM.
SO...THIS IS DIFFICULT,
BUT...I KNOW YOUR HUSBAND'S KILLER.
UM, SO DO WE.
YOU DO?
UH...
IT'S VERY BRAVE OF YOU, MARY,
TO COME HERE,
CONSIDERING YOUR STEPSISTER TOOK HIS LIFE.
I'M SORRY. WHAT?
I FIGURED THAT'S WHY YOU CAME HERE.
YESTERDAY, THE POLICE INFORMED US
THEY RECEIVED A CALL FROM A WOMAN
CLAIMING TO BE ALICE.
SHE OWNED UP TO THE MURDER.
THEY'RE STILL CONFIRMING ALL THE FACTS,
BUT IT ADDS UP.
SHE KNEW THE EXACT LOCATION
AND THE CAUSE...
AND THE DESCRIPTION MATCHES
WHAT MY YOUNGEST TOLD US...
THAT HE SAW A WOMAN WITH BLOND HAIR
ATTACK MY HUSBAND.
I--I ASSUME THAT'S WHAT YOU WERE HERE TO TELL US.
YES.
THAT.
I'M SO SORRY.
I'M SORRY
FOR HOW I RESPONDED WITH LUKE.
I FROZE.
NOT A BIG DEAL.
MAYBE A LITTLE BIT OF A DEAL, THOUGH.
I'M NOT SAYING WE NEED TO SHOUT ANYTHING FROM ROOFTOPS,
BUT YOU HAVE TO ADMIT THERE'S A DIFFERENCE
BETWEEN KEEPING SOMETHING PRIVATE
AND HIDING SOMETHING.
I WASN'T HIDING ANYTHING.
IT WAS NONE OF HIS BUSINESS.
LUKE: BATWING TO BATMOBILE.
BATWING, WE'RE HERE. STATUS UPDATE?
FOUND A MATCH ON OUR CAR.
IT'S PARKED ON THE EDGE OF A CEMETERY
ON THE OTHER SIDE OF GOTHAM U.
-JUST SENT YOU THE COORDINATES. -OK. THANKS.
UNH!
[MOANING AND WHIMPERING]
HYAH!
AAH! AAH!
I WONDER WHO WE GOT NEXT.
[MUFFLED] MARQUISH, MARQUISH, S-S-SHTOP.
DOES THAT LOOK FAMILIAR?
-OHH! -HMM?
SHTOP. SHTOP.
YOU--YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS, SON.
I'M GONNA FREEZE YOU
LIKE YOU TRIED TO FREEZE ME, MOM.
IT'S GONNA BE JUST LIKE YOU ALWAYS USED TO SAY--
GO STAND IN THE CORNER
AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE.
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE DECADES TO DO EXACTLY THAT
EXCEPT THEY'RE NOT GONNA BE PLEASANT THOUGHTS.
THEY'RE GONNA BE THE THOUGHTS
OF A WOMAN WHO IS MORE LIKE
HER CRAZY SON THAN SHE'D EVER LIKE TO ADMIT.
[WHIMPERING]
MARQUIS.
WELCOME TO THE CLUB, JADA JET.
MARQUIS, MARQUIS, DON'T!
-WE'RE ALL MAD HERE. -DON'T.
AGH!
RAAH!
DAMN. I THROW YOU A PARTY,
AND THIS IS HOW YOU THANK ME?
GIVE...IT TO ME.
OR--OR...
WE RULE GOTHAM TOGETHER.
YOU COULD BE THE HARLEY TO MY JOKER.
HEH HEH.
I THINK YOU HAVE THAT BACKWARDS.
BESIDES, WE COME FROM DIFFERENT SCHOOLS OF LOONEY TUNE.
IS THAT WHAT YOU REALLY THINK?
MM-HMM.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA, DO YOU?
2003--MY SECOND GRADE CLASS WAS ON A FIELD TRIP
WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN OUT OF NOWHERE,
SOMEONE BANGS ON THE DOOR,
AND LO AND BEHOLD, IT'S THE FREAKING JOKER.
HE BLOWS BUS DRIVER'S HEAD OFF.
[KIDS SCREAMING]
NOW I REALIZED NOBODY WAS GONNA DO ANYTHING TO HELP,
SO I THOUGHT, YOU KNOW, MAYBE IT SHOULD BE ME,
SO I WALK UP TO HIM TERRIFIED
BUT ACTING ALL BRAVE,
AND HE LOOKS DOWN AT ME
WITH HIS DEFORMED SMILE,
AND THEN HE JUST STARTS LAUGHING AND LAUGHING.
[JOKER LAUGHING]
THEN THE JOKER LEANS IN,
AND HE SAYS,
"I'M TAKING YOU KIDS TO AMUSEMENT MILE,
"WHERE I'M HIDING THE BIGGEST ACID BOMB YOU'VE EVER SEEN,
"AND GOTHAM CITY'S GONNA RAIN CHEMICALS
UNTIL EVERYBODY LOOKS LIKE THE JOKER."
HA HA HA HA! HA HA HA HA! HA HA HA!
ZZZAP!
NEXT THING I KNOW,
SOMEBODY YELLS THAT BATMAN IS FOLLOWING US.
[SCREAMING]
AND THERE WAS THIS, UH-- THERE WAS THIS CAR
IN FRONT OF US DRIVING HELLA SLOW.
I JUST HEARD THE JOKER REVVING HIS ENGINE.
[TIRES SQUEALING]
YOU...WERE ON THE BUS THAT DROVE MY MOM'S CAR OFF THE BRIDGE.
ALICE, THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO TELL YOU.
IT'S FATE.
YOU AND I WERE BORN ON THE SAME DAY.
YOU HEAR THAT, MOM?
I GUESS THAT MEANS TODAY'S YOUR BIRTHDAY.
BUCKLE UP.
WHAT IF I WERE TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING
THAT WOULD MAKE THE JOKER WISH HE WERE YOU?
SOPHIE: THAT'S NOT YOURS.
-OH. THANK GOD. -WHERE IS HE?
I DON'T KNOW. HE JUST LEFT.
YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME ABOUT BLACK GLOVE.
I COULD HAVE HELPED.
AND RISK LOSING YOU ALL OVER AGAIN?
YOU NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE NOW.
I'M NOT LEAVING YOU WITH HIM.
GO!
GIVE ME THE BUZZER, ALICE.
WHY ARE YOU HERE?
WE NEED IT FOR MARQUIS.
SAYS WHO? JADA?
THE WOMAN WHO TURNED YOUR SISTER INTO OLAF?
I'M NOT DOING IT FOR JADA.
I'M DOING IT TO STOP MARQUIS FROM WREAKING HELL ACROSS THIS CITY.
WELL...IF IT'S HELL THAT YOU WANT...
YOU'VE COME TO THE RIGHT GIRL.
OHH!
[BOTH GRUNTING]
HEH. HA HA HA!
I'M SORRY. I KNOW YOU SAID NEVER TO TOUCH YOUR GUN,
BUT, OH, IT'S SO ALLURING. HA HA!
UNH!
THAT IS SO UNFAIR!
-RRR! -UNH!
[ALICE AND SOPHIE GRUNTING]
ALICE: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? LET GO OF ME!
OHH! NO. NO, NO, NO, NO!
THAT'S MINE!
DON'T. NO!
[SOBBING]
NO, S-SOPHIE, PLEASE.
DON'T MAKE ME GO BACK THERE!
DON'T MAKE ME GO BACK TO ARKHAM.
BARBARA? BARBARA KEAN, WAKE UP.
[COUGHING]
I'M GONNA GET YOU HELP, OK?
JUST STAY WITH ME.
ARR!
I DON'T WANT TO HURT YOU.
HURT ME? WHAT, YOU WORE A SUPERSUIT HERE
BECAUSE IT'S CUTE?
LOOK AT YOU.
JUST A COWARD HIDING HER FACE.
OTHERWISE, EVERYONE WOULD KNOW SHE'S JUST
A PUNK-ASS STREET RAT WHOSE OWN MOMMY DIDN'T WANT HER.
-THAT BETTER? -OH, LOOK AT YOU. TOUGH GIRL!
I'M NOT COMPETING WITH YOU MARQUIS.
OH, IS THIS THE PART WHERE YOU TELL ME IT'S NOT MY FAULT,
THAT I'M A VICTIM, THAT YOU FEEL SORRY FOR ME?
I DON'T FEEL SORRY FOR YOU.
WHEN I FIRST LEARNED ABOUT YOU,
I WAS JEALOUS OF YOU.
YOU HAD EVERYTHING-- SECURITY, LOVE,
FAMILY, A FUTURE.
OH, YEAH, YEAH. MY BRAINS WERE SCRAMBLED EGGS,
BUT, HEY, DISNEYLAND FAST PASS, AM I RIGHT?
YOU GREW UP BELIEVING YOU COULD BE ANYONE,
THAT YOU COULD DO ANYTHING.
I WAS JEALOUS I DIDN'T GET THAT
TILL I REALIZED I HAD SOMETHING YOU DIDN'T HAVE--HOPE.
I HAVE HOPE!
I GOT HOPE COMING OUT OF MY EARS, WILDER.
FOR EXAMPLE...
[RYAN GROANS]
I WAS HOPING THAT DIDN'T KILL YOU...
-UNH! -SO I COULD FREEZE YOUR ASS
ALONGSIDE MOM.
JADA: THAT'S ENOUGH.
[COCKS PISTOL]
DON'T MAKE ME DO THIS, MARQUIS.
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, SHOOT YOUR OWN SON?
YOU'RE NOT MY SON,
NOT ANYMORE.
[GAS HISSING]
THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO RUN.
NICE TRY, BABY GIRL,
BUT I'M NOT MAKING THAT MISTAKE AGAIN.
[CELL PHONE CHIMES]
SO I'VE NEVER BEEN IN AN OUT RELATIONSHIP WITH A GIRL.
OK. SO WE'RE DOING THIS.
JUST HEAR ME OUT.
I'VE NEVER INTRODUCED A GIRL TO MY FRIENDS
OR HAD TO GET JORDAN'S APPROVAL
OR--GOD HELP US ALL--
HAD A GIRL MEET MY MOM,
SO THAT'S WHAT TODAY TRIGGERED FOR ME.
WHAT IF I FINALLY FIND THE COURAGE TO BE OUT
BUT THE PERSON I'M INTERESTED IN
DOESN'T WANT THE SAME THING?
ONE...I'M PRETTY SURE JORDAN LOVES ME,
AND TWO...YOU'RE RIGHT.
I WAS HIDING,
NOT FROM LUKE, FROM MYSELF,
BECAUSE EVERY TIME I GET SOMETHING GOOD,
I END UP LOSING IT.
WELL, THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN THIS TIME.
YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME MEET YOUR MOM, AREN'T YOU?
DO I NEED TO REMIND YOU WHAT HAPPENED
THE NIGHT I MET YOUR MOM?
[SNORTS]
HA HA HA!
-YOU OWE ME BIG TIME. -OK.
CAN I WEAR THE BATSUIT AT LEAST?
I'M THE ONE SHE'S GONNA TRY TO KILL, NOT YOU.
SHE--SHE'S GONNA BE TRYING TO TELL ME TO DO ALL THIS OTHER STUFF THAT--
[FOOTSTEPS]
LUKE: WELL, MARQUIS DITCHED THE ROLLS,
SO WE LOST EYES ON HIM.
KNOWING HIM, HE WON'T STAY OFF THE RADAR VERY LONG.
SO WE CALL THE POLICE, SMOKE HIM OUT
BEFORE HE MAKES HIS NEXT MOVE?
I'M NOT LETTING HIM ROT IN ARKHAM
FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE.
LOOK. WE HAVE THE BUZZER.
ALICE CAN'T TAKE IT FROM US.
GIVE ME 24 HOURS.
IF I CAN'T STOP MARQUIS, THEN FINE,
TAKE IT OUT OF MY HAND,
BUT I DESERVE ONE SHOT.
SORRY. WEREN'T YOU WEARING THAT YESTERDAY?
OH, MY GOD. YOU, TOO?
WHAT IS WITH THE FASHION POLICE TODAY?
ARE--ARE YOU TWO...
WAIT.
NO. HANG ON.
WAIT.
OH, MY GOD!
YOU ARE, AREN'T YOU?
[GASPS]
LUKE: SORRY. WHAT IS HAPPENING?
RYAN AND SOPHIE ARE TOTALLY A THING.
SERIOUSLY?
YEAH.
WE'RE OFFICIALLY A THING.
[MARY CLAPS]
HA HA HA HA HA!
THIS IS--WOW! OK. YAY!
OH, I ACTUALLY CAN'T REMEMBER THE LAST TIME
I HEARD GOOD NEWS, SO..AAH!
ARE YOU OK RIGHT NOW?
WHY ARE WE STILL HERE?
WE'RE LEAVING, OK,
SO YOU TWO CAN HAVE THE WHOLE PLACE TO YOURSELVES
TO BE ALL CUTE AND COUPLY. HA HA!
HA HA! OH, MY GO-- OH, MY GOD, NO!
OK. COME ON!
[GASPING]
AAH!
[WHISTLING]
[GASPS]
OCEAN: YOU FIGURED IT OUT YET?
WE'RE NEVER GONNA LEAVE YOU.
SHOULD HAVE BUZZED YOURSELF WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE, ALICE.
YOU ARE THE ONE WHO STOPPED ME.
HEH HEH HEH.
EXACTLY.
SO THAT EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY
WE CAN BE HERE TO REMIND YOU
WHAT YOU DID TO US.
PLEASE GO AWAY.
JUST GO AWAY!
I SAID GET AWAY FROM ME!
OW!
-ARE--ARE YOU REAL? -YES.
YES, ALICE. I'M--I'M REAL.
I--I TOLD THE FACILITY THAT I WAS
YOUR PERSONAL PHYSICIAN.
YOU HAVE TO GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I...I HAD TO COME
AND SAY THANK YOU.
WHAT YOU DID FOR ME
WAS...ABOVE AND BEYOND ANYTHING
THAT ANYONE'S EVER DONE FOR ME.
THANK YOU.
WHAT'S ONE MORE ON THE RESUME?
CONSIDER IT A PARTING GIFT.
HEY. YOU DON'T HAVE TO DEFLECT.
I KNOW YOU'RE TRYING.
I'M SORRY, MARY.
IT'S OK.
NO.
I'M REALLY... REALLY SORRY.
WHAT DID YOU DO?
HA HA HA! HA HA HA!
AHH!
LET'S HAVE SOME FUN.
MAN: GREG, MOVE YOUR HEAD!