1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:04,720 {\an8}I've had another complaint. And it's a GMC one. It's going to tribunal. 2 00:00:04,760 --> 00:00:07,160 {\an8}Why would Erika complain again? She hasn't. It's anonymous. 3 00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:10,040 {\an8}You think that you are the cleverest person in the room, 4 00:00:10,080 --> 00:00:12,560 {\an8}and that makes you dangerous. You're a liability! 5 00:00:12,600 --> 00:00:14,760 I mean, I guess you are the one who sent her home early 6 00:00:14,800 --> 00:00:17,120 and then falsified the notes. All right, Judge Judy! 7 00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:19,720 If you ever want to chat about Harry, you know I'm here for you. 8 00:00:19,760 --> 00:00:22,400 I think I'm actually designed to be on my own. 9 00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:24,680 I'm sorry. I really did try. 10 00:00:24,720 --> 00:00:27,000 SOBS: I don't know what she was thinking. 11 00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:38,840 LOUD GROANING 12 00:00:38,880 --> 00:00:42,360 Sorry you've ended up with a twin room. No room at the inn today. 13 00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:43,800 Better than a bunk bed, I guess. 14 00:00:43,840 --> 00:00:46,000 Yeah - get four to a room that way! 15 00:00:46,040 --> 00:00:48,000 GROANING, DEVICE BEEPS AND VIBRATES 16 00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:51,920 Sorry! Sorry about the room. 17 00:00:51,960 --> 00:00:53,560 SCREAMING CONTINUES 18 00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:54,760 Sorry. 19 00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:00,800 BABY CRIES 20 00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:02,720 BEEPING AND VIBRATING 21 00:01:02,760 --> 00:01:05,640 Hey, baby! HE LAUGHS 22 00:01:05,680 --> 00:01:08,440 I'm so sorry about all this. 23 00:01:08,480 --> 00:01:12,080 He got wasted at the office party. I'm going to strangle him later. 24 00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:15,080 Make sure you do a thorough job - because they're really busy in A&E. 25 00:01:15,120 --> 00:01:18,480 That's a nice big contraction now. One last big push for me. 26 00:01:18,520 --> 00:01:19,760 You're doing really well. 27 00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:21,880 SHE GROANS 28 00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:23,640 Stop pushing. Pant. 29 00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:25,560 SHE PANTS, MAN LAUGHS 30 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:28,360 BABY CRIES 31 00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:30,760 Yay! Wahey! 32 00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:34,160 Love you! 33 00:01:35,240 --> 00:01:36,720 Love you. 34 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:52,880 LIQUID SPLASHES 35 00:01:52,920 --> 00:01:54,280 Sir! 36 00:01:54,320 --> 00:01:56,040 Sir! Stop that. 37 00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:58,120 This is not a toilet, you absolute... 38 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:00,400 SHE SHOUTS 39 00:02:06,240 --> 00:02:08,680 Why don't you pop downstairs and go for a walk for half an hour? 40 00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:11,240 What, you can't squeeze us in before then? 41 00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:13,160 I'm not running a Pizza Express, sir. 42 00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:16,000 Who bleeped me? Tracy needs an FBS done, love. 43 00:02:16,040 --> 00:02:17,920 Do me an FBS. 44 00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:21,920 What does FBS mean? Foetal blood sample. Oh. 45 00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:24,280 Which room? Five. Erm... 46 00:02:24,320 --> 00:02:26,600 Are you going to go to Shruti's thing later? 47 00:02:26,640 --> 00:02:29,240 Well, I was planning to, but I'm not sure I can leave all this with a 48 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:31,160 PE teacher in scrubs. 49 00:02:31,200 --> 00:02:34,360 Er, Adam, can I ask you a question about a patient I've just seen? 50 00:02:34,400 --> 00:02:39,000 Quick, then. So...she's 32 and a half years old, 51 00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:41,680 she's 37 weeks pregnant, generally fit and well. 52 00:02:41,720 --> 00:02:43,320 She has asthma, so sometimes... 53 00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:45,880 Quick's the one when you get to the fucking point. 54 00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:50,440 Right. She's got a urine infection, so... Yeah, erm... 55 00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:54,280 So, should I give her some antibiotics? 56 00:02:54,320 --> 00:02:57,560 As opposed to what, a healing crystal and some magic runes? 57 00:02:58,760 --> 00:03:00,320 Absolute waste of organs. 58 00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:03,400 And the award for Boss of the Year goes to...! 59 00:03:05,640 --> 00:03:08,080 MOBILE VIBRATES 60 00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:15,400 Angle the lamp a bit better for me. 61 00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:18,960 Please? 62 00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:22,000 Please. 63 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:27,520 Remember to file another complaint about my manners. 64 00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:29,320 I've had weeks of this now, Adam. 65 00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:32,280 Can you stop being quite so much of a twat. Tracy! 66 00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:35,160 No, don't "Tracy" me! Anyway, the patient's deaf. 67 00:03:35,200 --> 00:03:37,320 And if she wasn't sure, I'm sure she'd agree 68 00:03:37,360 --> 00:03:39,640 that was a pretty twat-ish thing to say. 69 00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:41,160 I know old habits are hard to change, 70 00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:43,080 but want to try being professional? 71 00:03:43,120 --> 00:03:44,680 What, like you? 72 00:03:44,720 --> 00:03:46,680 Well, that's assuming I still have a profession 73 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:48,400 after my hearing tomorrow. 74 00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:51,640 SHE SIGHS 75 00:03:51,680 --> 00:03:54,520 And just so you know, I'm nipping out to Shruti's memorial 76 00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:57,360 for five minutes, if I can. What, so you've got time for her 77 00:03:57,400 --> 00:03:58,840 now she's dead, do you? 78 00:04:01,320 --> 00:04:03,200 I'm...sorry. I didn't mean that. 79 00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:07,920 Absolutely sure that it's me that's the twat? 80 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:10,360 You do know I can lip-read, right? 81 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:15,920 Hey. 82 00:04:17,360 --> 00:04:19,280 You coming to the memorial? 83 00:04:19,320 --> 00:04:20,600 Yeah. 84 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:23,880 BEEPING AND VIBRATING 85 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:29,560 Have fun. Hey, give me that. 86 00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:32,520 She'd have wanted you there. 87 00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:37,200 You sure? Of course. 88 00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:43,040 MOBILE VIBRATES 89 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:44,400 You've got 30 seconds. 90 00:04:44,440 --> 00:04:47,560 Right. So Emma's been getting this weird pain in her groin. 91 00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:50,120 It only happens if she stands on one leg, but it's agony. 92 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:52,320 What do you reckon? Stand on two legs. 93 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:54,120 I mean, if she's putting her trousers on. 94 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:56,200 It's probably just symphysis pubis dysfunction. 95 00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:57,960 It's nothing to worry about. See a physio. 96 00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:00,640 They can give her this special belt thing. You're a legend, and... 97 00:05:00,680 --> 00:05:01,720 Time's up! Bye. 98 00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:09,080 CHATTER 99 00:05:09,120 --> 00:05:10,880 WOMAN CLEARS THROAT 100 00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:14,120 Thanks so much to so many of you for coming. 101 00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:16,360 Christ knows who's looking after the labour ward. 102 00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:18,000 Better not be me! MOBILE RINGS 103 00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:21,360 We're obviously here to remember Shruti Akarya 104 00:05:21,400 --> 00:05:24,080 and to unveil this lovely... 105 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:28,240 ..I'm going to say oak tree in her honour. 106 00:05:29,400 --> 00:05:33,160 So let me hand over, first of all, to Mr and Mrs Akarya. 107 00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:36,200 Acharya. Acharya. 108 00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:40,680 Thank you, all, for coming. 109 00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:45,280 You know, Shruti loved being a doctor. 110 00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:48,680 But every time she called us, she would tell us how much 111 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:51,120 she enjoyed working with you all. 112 00:05:53,040 --> 00:05:59,240 Shruti...brought us huge pride in everything she achieved. 113 00:05:59,280 --> 00:06:03,720 And it brings us great joy that she will live on, 114 00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:07,360 not just in our hearts and our minds, 115 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:12,840 but in this beautiful tree which will live longer than anyone here. 116 00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:17,720 APPLAUSE 117 00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:22,080 As Shruti's educational supervisor, 118 00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:26,760 I know first-hand what a committed and dedicated doctor she was, 119 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:31,320 as evidenced by her passing her Part One exam first-time - 120 00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:33,920 something, I might add, I did not do. 121 00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:36,320 Seven driving tests, too, and counting. 122 00:06:36,360 --> 00:06:38,760 Can do a caesarean in five minutes with one hand, 123 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:40,600 can't reverse around a bloody corner! 124 00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:42,680 SUBDUED LAUGHTER 125 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:45,160 We're all the poorer for her loss. 126 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:51,560 But depression is cruel, and in Shruti's case, silent. 127 00:06:52,920 --> 00:06:54,240 While she was... 128 00:06:56,360 --> 00:06:58,080 ..clearly doing well at work, 129 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:00,960 obviously, there were other forces at play. 130 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:04,320 In life, like on labour ward, you never really know 131 00:07:04,360 --> 00:07:06,120 what's around the corner. 132 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:10,000 SHE GROANS 133 00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:13,160 Miss Houghton? All right? 134 00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:16,520 I think maybe Shruti wasn't quite as happy at work as you said. 135 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:19,840 SARCASTICALLY: No? Do you reckon? 136 00:07:19,880 --> 00:07:23,360 Well, what did you want her parents to hear, that she couldn't hack it? 137 00:07:24,880 --> 00:07:27,920 I mean, like, shouldn't there be some kind of investigation? 138 00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:31,120 Or are we all just going to keep pretending 139 00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:33,560 there's nothing wrong with this place? 140 00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:36,720 Sorry, I must be dementing. When did I say there was nothing wrong? 141 00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:40,520 This hospital's got about three doctors and a budget of £12.50. 142 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:43,040 So, if you want to change it, become a government minister, 143 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:45,880 because there is bollocks-all any of us here can do. 144 00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:47,760 Well, I... 145 00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:51,520 So what do we do now, then? 146 00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:53,840 Well, we all toddle off back to work, don't we? 147 00:07:55,480 --> 00:07:59,240 And eventually they forget to water the tree and that dies as well. 148 00:08:08,960 --> 00:08:11,200 MOBILE VIBRATES 149 00:08:18,800 --> 00:08:20,600 I'm so sorry for your loss. 150 00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:26,000 Er... Did you work closely with Shruti? 151 00:08:27,320 --> 00:08:28,400 I... 152 00:08:30,400 --> 00:08:32,480 No, not really, no. Erm... 153 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,640 But she's much missed. 154 00:08:46,160 --> 00:08:47,640 Walk with me, Kay. 155 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:54,600 So...tomorrow's your big day at GMC towers? 156 00:08:55,800 --> 00:08:57,600 Yes, yeah. It is, yeah. 157 00:08:57,640 --> 00:09:00,240 I must say, I'm very sorry you're going through all this. 158 00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:02,280 For what it's worth, I think it's bloody unfair 159 00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:04,920 that it has to end like this. I'm not sure it's going to end. 160 00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:09,560 Well, you falsified the notes. Seemed pretty cut-and-dry to me. 161 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:11,960 I'm not sure anyone really comes back from that. 162 00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:13,920 No, I wrote what you told me to write, 163 00:09:13,960 --> 00:09:15,400 and then you weaselled back on it. 164 00:09:15,440 --> 00:09:18,240 Well, my lawyer thinks I stand a fighting chance. 165 00:09:19,680 --> 00:09:22,160 How are you intending to play things at the tribunal? 166 00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:27,440 Well, hopefully I'll persuade them that a simple lapse 167 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:30,480 in my professional judgment shouldn't need to bring 168 00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:32,440 my future into question. 169 00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:34,440 You're a bloody good doctor, Adam. 170 00:09:35,440 --> 00:09:37,840 We need more doctors like you. 171 00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:41,320 You owe it to yourself, to your patients, to stay in the game. 172 00:09:41,360 --> 00:09:46,280 If I was in your position, I think I'd try and realign the narrative 173 00:09:46,320 --> 00:09:48,400 ever so slightly. 174 00:09:48,440 --> 00:09:50,840 I'm not sure that I follow. 175 00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:56,000 Well, you just tell our friends at the GMC that your colleague, 176 00:09:56,040 --> 00:10:00,120 Dr Acharya, mistakenly told you that I said it was OK 177 00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:04,560 to send the patient home when, in fact, she hadn't spoken to me. 178 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:10,040 She and she alone knocked over the first domino. 179 00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:15,040 But she... But she didn't do that. 180 00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:16,120 Who's to know? 181 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:21,440 You're suggesting that I throw her... 182 00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:23,320 ..I throw Shruti under the bus? 183 00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:25,120 No-one loses this way. 184 00:10:25,160 --> 00:10:28,480 It's time for pragmatism, Adam, not emotions - 185 00:10:28,520 --> 00:10:31,240 if you want to keep your job, that is. 186 00:10:32,640 --> 00:10:34,560 ENGINE STARTS 187 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:40,160 PIANO PLAYS SOFTLY 188 00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:48,920 I've got a crowbar! 189 00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:50,280 Just me, Mum. 190 00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:54,120 I know it's just you. I've come to smash up the piano. 191 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:57,880 Schubert. 192 00:10:57,920 --> 00:11:00,120 You'd never know just from listening. 193 00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:05,160 You all set for tomorrow? 194 00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:09,960 Yeah, I guess. It's just a hiccup. It's a vexatious bit of bureaucracy. 195 00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:13,120 You are going to shave, right? Mm-hm. 196 00:11:13,160 --> 00:11:15,280 Make sure you give a good showing, Adam, 197 00:11:15,320 --> 00:11:18,920 because we've all worked so hard to get you here. 198 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:20,400 Oh, "we", is it? 199 00:11:20,440 --> 00:11:23,200 Remind me how many labour ward shifts you've done. 200 00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:25,120 Oh, just the one visit to a labour ward, 201 00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:28,080 and then an entire lifetime given up to getting you here. 202 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:32,800 Not sure I remember ever asking you to. 203 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:35,440 Quite how you ended up so rude, I'll never know. 204 00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:40,320 A mystery for the ages. 205 00:11:55,560 --> 00:11:58,000 TANNOY: We are now approaching Manchester Piccadilly, 206 00:11:58,040 --> 00:11:59,960 where this service terminates. 207 00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:03,360 Yeah, so I just say yes or no to their questions. 208 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:07,000 And anything that needs a longer answer than that, I'll take it. 209 00:12:10,560 --> 00:12:12,720 Am I going to be all right? 210 00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:14,200 Yeah, totally. 211 00:12:17,600 --> 00:12:19,920 Oh, sorry, hang on. What did he say? 212 00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:22,680 Am I going to be all right? Oh, Christ knows. 213 00:12:23,720 --> 00:12:26,320 But... But you know my motto - 214 00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:28,160 never say never. 215 00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:32,320 I'm going to go to the bathroom. OK. 216 00:12:34,360 --> 00:12:36,360 You've got five minutes, Alan. 217 00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:38,320 DOOR BANGS 218 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:47,040 DOOR OPENS 219 00:12:50,600 --> 00:12:51,920 Just do it. 220 00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,000 You treated me like shit when I was alive. 221 00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:56,640 What does one more time matter? 222 00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:18,120 You weren't doing coke in there? 223 00:13:20,280 --> 00:13:21,480 No. 224 00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:24,400 Adam Kay? 225 00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:32,520 Right, after you. Good luck. 226 00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:39,400 Hope you saved some for us afterwards. 227 00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:50,840 Great. I'm going to get struck off in a room that looks like 228 00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:52,880 it's used for a speed-awareness course. 229 00:13:56,680 --> 00:13:59,520 Good afternoon. My name is Tina Sharpehouse, 230 00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:01,400 and I'm the tribunal chair. 231 00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:05,480 This is a fitness to practise hearing for Adam Richard Kay. 232 00:14:06,760 --> 00:14:08,840 Would you please stand up, Dr Kay? 233 00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:12,640 Still calling me "doctor" - that's a good start. 234 00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:14,840 Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth 235 00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:16,560 and nothing but the truth? 236 00:14:22,760 --> 00:14:24,120 I do. 237 00:14:24,160 --> 00:14:25,520 Please be seated. 238 00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:34,560 On April 16th, at 4.15pm, you reviewed patient Erika Van Hegan, 239 00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:38,200 25 weeks pregnant and presenting with a headache. 240 00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:40,240 You discharged her home. 241 00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:43,800 You wrote in the notes that you had discussed this decision 242 00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:46,640 with your consultant, Mr Nigel Lockhart, 243 00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:48,320 a fact that he denies. 244 00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:50,520 I'd like to say a few words. WHISPERS: No, you wouldn't! 245 00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:53,200 There's time for you to say anything you need to later on. 246 00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:55,400 You may sit back down. On the day in question, 247 00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:58,600 I was working alongside an SHO colleague... 248 00:15:02,240 --> 00:15:04,040 ..called Shruti Acharya. 249 00:15:10,160 --> 00:15:12,400 HE CHUCKLES I did not see that coming. 250 00:15:12,440 --> 00:15:14,880 I mean, if you'd asked me before, I'd have said you were toast, 251 00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:18,240 but then - bam, out of nowhere - you come out with that. 252 00:15:18,280 --> 00:15:20,040 I literally can't believe we won. 253 00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:23,200 I can't tell you how much I needed this, by the way. 254 00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:25,760 My numbers have NOT been good this year. 255 00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:34,480 PHONE VIBRATES 256 00:16:12,080 --> 00:16:13,560 Good to see you. 257 00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:16,280 You too. Do you want...something? 258 00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:17,800 No, thanks. 259 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,440 How are you? 260 00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:23,000 Yeah, not bad. 261 00:16:23,040 --> 00:16:24,640 That's good. 262 00:16:24,680 --> 00:16:26,560 The couple downstairs have a new baby, 263 00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:30,920 which screams, like, 20 hours a day, so your timing was pretty good. 264 00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:32,920 HE LAUGHS 265 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:35,880 You're looking well. 266 00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:37,680 Does that mean fat? 267 00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:40,440 BOTH LAUGH It's her cooking. It's... 268 00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:42,960 You know, the main ingredient is butter. 269 00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:46,920 How is it? 270 00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,600 Attached back to Mummy's apron strings? 271 00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:51,240 They're slightly strangling. 272 00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:54,080 But, you know, 273 00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:56,960 when did a bit of light strangulation ever hurt anyone? 274 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:06,360 So, I had a good chat with the estate agents. 275 00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:08,720 They said there's actually a six-month break clause, 276 00:17:08,760 --> 00:17:10,360 so I can move out in September. 277 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:13,240 I printed off the form. 278 00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:16,080 You just need to sign at the bottom. 279 00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:24,360 How's work? 280 00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:26,600 HE CRIES 281 00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:30,480 Shit. 282 00:17:37,240 --> 00:17:38,520 Shruti? 283 00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:42,080 It's so horrible. 284 00:17:44,080 --> 00:17:46,920 I just keep playing over in my mind everything I said to her. 285 00:17:52,400 --> 00:17:54,520 Everything I should have said. 286 00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:00,640 Everything I shouldn't. I just... 287 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:02,840 ..I don't understand how it... 288 00:18:04,720 --> 00:18:06,200 Anyway. 289 00:18:07,840 --> 00:18:09,320 I let her down so terribly. 290 00:18:10,360 --> 00:18:12,000 Don't beat yourself up. 291 00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:15,480 I'm sure you were a great boss. 292 00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:17,440 I was a crap boss. 293 00:18:19,040 --> 00:18:20,840 Crap boyfriend. Crap doctor. 294 00:18:22,880 --> 00:18:24,080 Hey, come on. 295 00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:28,040 So, what, I was an amazing boyfriend? 296 00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:37,200 What are you doing Saturday? 297 00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:38,520 A 10K. 298 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:40,840 That sounds awful. 299 00:18:42,040 --> 00:18:45,120 Well, there's still a place at Greg's wedding if you fancy it. 300 00:18:46,280 --> 00:18:47,880 And that's meant to be an upgrade? 301 00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:54,360 Emma's designed the table decorations. They're terrible. 302 00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:57,080 Like 4ft foot glass dildos. Christ. 303 00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:01,000 Anyway, 304 00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:04,520 would you consider being my temporary plus-one? 305 00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:08,080 Oh, I don't know. I don't... I'm not sure. 306 00:19:08,120 --> 00:19:09,280 Special... 307 00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:13,200 ..one-night-only cameo appearance? 308 00:19:19,600 --> 00:19:22,160 PHONE VIBRATES 309 00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:24,280 Hi, Greg. Quick one - sure it's nothing. 310 00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:25,720 Then, maybe don't phone me about it. 311 00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:27,840 Emma just called to say the baby's not been kicking. 312 00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:30,480 You know, it's normally a right little Ronaldo, but this morning 313 00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:33,720 it's more of a Ronny Rosenthal. More homosexual references, please. 314 00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:36,080 Footwork of Bob Fosse, that kind of thing. 315 00:19:36,120 --> 00:19:39,000 When did she last feel any movement? About 90 minutes ago. 316 00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:41,480 Tell her to drink a pint of ice-cold water. 317 00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:42,800 Should get it moving. 318 00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:45,400 Bit like chucking a pint of cold water over Jakesy to wake him up. 319 00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:46,680 Exactly. 320 00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:52,040 Isn't one of the school lot a recruitment consultant now? 321 00:19:52,080 --> 00:19:54,120 Yeah, Welly. Oh, shit. 322 00:19:54,160 --> 00:19:56,680 Is anyone else? He's amazing at it, amazingly. 323 00:19:56,720 --> 00:20:00,520 He's a bit like the Incredible Hulk, only it's tequila that sets him off. 324 00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:02,120 Is this about the...? 325 00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:04,280 Oh, Christ, did you get struck off? 326 00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:06,760 No, no. I did what I had to. 327 00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:08,000 Meaning? 328 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,480 Just wonder if a change of scenery might be good for me. 329 00:20:10,520 --> 00:20:11,920 DISTANT SIREN WAILS 330 00:20:18,520 --> 00:20:20,200 OK, look at you! 331 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,240 Look who's here. 332 00:20:25,280 --> 00:20:26,600 My God, Dr Adam! 333 00:20:26,640 --> 00:20:28,160 Oh, my God. 334 00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:30,240 I'm so glad you made it. 335 00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:32,320 Can you believe Misty's going home? 336 00:20:32,360 --> 00:20:33,680 You've got to say hello. 337 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,600 Look who came to see you. 338 00:20:36,640 --> 00:20:38,800 BABY GURGLES Dr Adam. 339 00:20:38,840 --> 00:20:41,520 I'm just very pleased that everything's 340 00:20:41,560 --> 00:20:43,200 turned out well in the end. 341 00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:45,120 Well, I actually got you something. 342 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:48,000 Just to say thank you. 343 00:20:48,040 --> 00:20:50,640 I mean, he wouldn't be here without you. 344 00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:57,040 Wow. 345 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:02,480 "World's best doctor." 346 00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:04,880 I don't know about that, but... You are. 347 00:21:07,160 --> 00:21:08,600 Oh, joint best. 348 00:21:08,640 --> 00:21:10,680 I got one for the lovely Asian lady doctor, too, 349 00:21:10,720 --> 00:21:12,640 so would you mind passing it on? 350 00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:14,240 Actually, she... 351 00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:18,840 No problem. 352 00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:21,200 Do you want to hold him? Sure. 353 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:23,040 Yeah? 354 00:21:23,080 --> 00:21:24,840 Yeah! 355 00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:26,520 Cuddles. 356 00:21:26,560 --> 00:21:28,320 Ah, yes! 357 00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:33,760 Look. 358 00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:40,400 You're going to be a surgeon like Dr Adam when you grow up. 359 00:21:40,440 --> 00:21:42,560 If that's what he really wants to do. 360 00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:47,240 Whatever he does, I'm sure he'll make you very proud. 361 00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:51,760 Well, I guess being a doctor isn't everyone's cup of teeth. 362 00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:53,120 BEEPING Oh, sorry. 363 00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:55,760 WOMAN: Labour ward, room one, shoulder dystocia. I have to... 364 00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:58,280 That's labour ward, room one, shoulder dystocia. Dr Adam... 365 00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:00,120 ..Dr Adam, you forgot your present. 366 00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:02,760 Shoulder dystocia are two words you never want to hear 367 00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:04,160 as an obstetrician. 368 00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:06,640 Baby's head delivers, but its shoulders get stuck. 369 00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:07,880 All the time this is going on, 370 00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:10,040 baby's brain isn't getting any oxygen. 371 00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:12,960 Five minutes of that, and it's irreversible damage. 372 00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:15,000 ALARM BLARES 373 00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:16,960 MOTHER PANTS 3 minutes 20. 374 00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:19,000 My name is Adam. I'm one of the doctors. 375 00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:21,120 I'm sure your midwife has explained 376 00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:23,880 the baby's head has come out, but the body is stuck. 377 00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:27,560 I want you to listen to what I ask you to do, and we'll get baby out. 378 00:22:27,600 --> 00:22:29,760 Get those knees up higher. MOTHER GROANS 379 00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:31,200 Higher, proper McRoberts. 380 00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:33,000 Come on, you need to get him out! 381 00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:34,800 SHE SOBS 382 00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:37,040 3 minutes 40. 383 00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:38,480 SHE SOBS 384 00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:40,040 What have you tried? 385 00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:41,760 Woods' Screw Manoeuvre? Posterior arm? 386 00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:43,680 Tracy? Agnieszka? Someone. 387 00:22:43,720 --> 00:22:46,040 Suprapubic pressure, rotating on all fours. 388 00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:47,640 We couldn't reach the posterior arm. 389 00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:49,440 You've emptied the bladder? Yes. 390 00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:51,680 SHE WAILS I'm going to put a hand inside 391 00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:52,960 to help baby out. 392 00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,000 SHE GROANS 393 00:22:58,240 --> 00:22:59,720 Fuck. 394 00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:02,400 I need the on-call consultant in here now. OK. 395 00:23:02,440 --> 00:23:03,920 That's four minutes. 396 00:23:03,960 --> 00:23:07,400 Last resort, seen it once three years ago. Do one, teach one. 397 00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:10,040 I'm going to have to break your baby's collarbone to get him out. 398 00:23:10,080 --> 00:23:12,080 He should heal perfectly, but there is a chance 399 00:23:12,120 --> 00:23:13,400 it can damage a nerve in his arm. 400 00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:15,160 Please don't hurt my baby. 401 00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:18,360 I don't have any other option. Please, please! 402 00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:23,240 4 minutes 20. My God. My God. 403 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:26,960 There's one other option. I can make a cut to divide your pubic bone. 404 00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:30,560 Never seen it. Can we have some time to discuss this? 405 00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:33,640 I've got less than one minute to get your baby delivered alive. 406 00:23:33,680 --> 00:23:35,160 OK. Cut the bone. 407 00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:36,600 SHE PANTS 408 00:23:36,640 --> 00:23:40,160 Local anaesthetic, needle, syringe, catheter, scalpel. 409 00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:42,200 Do you understand what I'm going to do? 410 00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:43,840 SHE WHIMPERS 411 00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:45,520 You've got this. 412 00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:48,920 SHE WAILS Stay nice and calm for me, darling. 413 00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:50,680 Anaesthetic's going in. 414 00:23:53,360 --> 00:23:55,240 OK? 415 00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:57,240 SHE MOANS OK, darling. It's OK. 416 00:23:58,880 --> 00:24:00,840 BONES CRACK, SHE SCREAMS Argh! Ah. 417 00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:02,880 Oh, God. SHE SOBS 418 00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:14,360 Is he OK? 419 00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:19,360 Is he OK? 420 00:24:19,400 --> 00:24:21,640 One, 1,000. 421 00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:23,240 Two, 1,000. 422 00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:24,640 Three, 1,000. 423 00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:26,800 BABY CRIES 424 00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:28,720 HE SIGHS 425 00:24:28,760 --> 00:24:30,600 Congratulations. 426 00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:44,640 Fuck. 427 00:24:47,880 --> 00:24:49,280 That was close. 428 00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:52,320 You did really well in there, Adam. 429 00:24:52,360 --> 00:24:54,040 I thought I was a menace to society 430 00:24:54,080 --> 00:24:56,360 and a danger to everyone I encounter. 431 00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:59,080 Can you just take a compliment? 432 00:24:59,120 --> 00:25:00,880 I'm not great at it, no. 433 00:25:04,480 --> 00:25:07,200 Can we just go back to insulting each other? 434 00:25:08,360 --> 00:25:10,760 Get a haircut. Going to have to hit me harder than that. 435 00:25:10,800 --> 00:25:13,000 Fine. Get a boyfriend. 436 00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:14,440 HE SIGHS 437 00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:17,240 Maybe slightly less hard. 438 00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:19,920 MACHINE BEEPS 439 00:25:23,360 --> 00:25:25,600 SOBBING 440 00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:35,520 Everything OK? 441 00:25:35,560 --> 00:25:37,400 I thought that baby was going to die... 442 00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:40,520 ..right in front of me. 443 00:25:41,760 --> 00:25:45,200 Yeah. Me, too, to be honest, but, hey, it didn't. 444 00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:46,840 I just didn't know what to do. 445 00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:49,480 I was useless. You weren't useless. 446 00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:51,440 You were actively making things worse. 447 00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:53,960 Not calling me for three minutes, then just standing there 448 00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:56,240 while all the rest of us... HE SOBS 449 00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:01,240 I'm sorry. I don't mean that. 450 00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:08,240 I was exactly the same as you at this stage. 451 00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:10,920 Maybe a bit better. 452 00:26:12,120 --> 00:26:14,120 And, yeah, the job can be horrible. 453 00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:17,600 So, you find ways of dealing with it. 454 00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:21,320 HE SOBS 455 00:26:21,360 --> 00:26:23,520 Give me your bleep. 456 00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:25,200 Take the rest of the afternoon off. 457 00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:28,200 Are you sure? 100%. 458 00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:31,840 Decompress, phone your mum, have a wank. Separately. 459 00:26:31,880 --> 00:26:34,440 Come on. Thank you, Adam. 460 00:26:35,880 --> 00:26:37,560 PAGER VIBRATES AND BEEPS 461 00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:13,240 Right, Dad's taking me to the station now. 462 00:27:13,280 --> 00:27:14,640 Um... 463 00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:17,520 ..I'll be late, so don't wait up. 464 00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:19,280 I'd check the invitation. 465 00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:22,680 I imagine it says dress fancy, not fancy dress. 466 00:27:22,720 --> 00:27:24,400 Ha-ha. 467 00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,600 Unless you're entertaining the kiddies' table. 468 00:27:27,800 --> 00:27:29,960 I get it. You don't like my clothes, 469 00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:32,680 you want me to be more successful, you wish I was straight. 470 00:27:32,720 --> 00:27:34,760 I just want you to be happy. 471 00:27:34,800 --> 00:27:36,560 I was happy with Harry. 472 00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:39,360 Yes, but, clearly, he wasn't that happy with you, was he? 473 00:27:41,560 --> 00:27:43,760 What do you know about being happy anyway? 474 00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:47,920 I know that it's difficult playing second fiddle to somebody's job. 475 00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:50,480 By the time you've had children, you're third fiddle. 476 00:27:50,520 --> 00:27:52,640 You're practically sat back with the cellos. 477 00:27:52,680 --> 00:27:55,120 Not everybody is able to cope with that. 478 00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:02,000 Monica's nephew's a homosexual, too. 479 00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:04,880 There's a lot of it about. 480 00:28:04,920 --> 00:28:06,320 He's a barrister. 481 00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:08,880 We could... 482 00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:10,640 ..have them all over for lunch. 483 00:28:10,680 --> 00:28:12,200 Oh, so it's just graphic designers 484 00:28:12,240 --> 00:28:14,520 that you've got a bit of a thing against, is it? 485 00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:21,080 That was unkind. I'm sorry. 486 00:28:22,640 --> 00:28:25,080 I'm sorry if you think I've been hard on you. 487 00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:43,200 I don't... 488 00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:46,280 ..think you've been hard on me. 489 00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:53,240 Well, in that case, I'm going to get you some of your father's shoes 490 00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:56,880 because those are barely fit for gardening. 491 00:29:11,880 --> 00:29:14,800 MUSIC: Bridal Chorus by Wagner 492 00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:27,400 MAN: Would you please be seated? 493 00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:34,880 Ladies and gentlemen, what a beautiful setting we're in 494 00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:37,760 and what a beautiful reason we're here. 495 00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:40,440 The celebration of love. 496 00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:43,240 In the words of Andrew Lloyd Webber, 497 00:29:43,280 --> 00:29:46,160 "Love, love changes everything." 498 00:29:47,760 --> 00:29:49,160 I'd go one further. 499 00:29:50,160 --> 00:29:51,560 Love IS everything. 500 00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:54,160 It completes us. 501 00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:56,160 It fulfils us. 502 00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:58,360 It makes the half whole. 503 00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:02,120 INDISTINCT CHATTER AND LAUGHTER 504 00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:12,680 Well, hello. 505 00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:14,360 Ah, hello. Hello, Emma. Hello. 506 00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:16,880 Room for a little one? OTHERS LAUGH 507 00:30:19,480 --> 00:30:23,840 Congratulations, Emma. The table decorations look really amazing. 508 00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:25,920 Oh, they really do, don't they? 509 00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:29,560 Is Harry in the bathroom? 510 00:30:30,680 --> 00:30:32,440 No, he...he... 511 00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:35,560 ..he didn't make it. 512 00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:37,360 I thought that he... 513 00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:39,840 ..but, yeah, it was a no-show, I'm afraid. 514 00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:41,960 Oh, Adam. 515 00:30:42,000 --> 00:30:45,000 That's awful. Honestly, I'm having a lovely time on my own. 516 00:30:45,040 --> 00:30:46,600 We've got a reserve list of 20. 517 00:30:46,640 --> 00:30:49,160 My cousin Harriet's fiance couldn't have a place. 518 00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:51,080 They're actually IN a relationship. 519 00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:53,600 Sorry. 520 00:30:53,640 --> 00:30:55,600 How are you? 521 00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:57,040 I'm fine. Yeah? 522 00:30:57,080 --> 00:30:58,120 Um... 523 00:30:59,640 --> 00:31:02,560 ..would you mind if we go somewhere private quickly? 524 00:31:03,640 --> 00:31:05,760 If this is about money, can you speak to Gregory? 525 00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:07,280 It's not about money. 526 00:31:07,320 --> 00:31:09,720 No? Can we try out here? 527 00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:12,360 Excuse me. 528 00:31:14,040 --> 00:31:15,520 Just here. 529 00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:20,440 I just wanted to give you this. 530 00:31:29,200 --> 00:31:30,800 Oh, is this a vibrator? 531 00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:32,680 It's not funny. No, no, no. 532 00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:35,120 It's a sonic aid, like in an antenatal clinic. 533 00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:38,240 I just thought the last few weeks might be easier if, um... 534 00:31:38,280 --> 00:31:39,960 Anyway. Well, I'll show you. 535 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:41,760 So, you press this. Mm-hm. 536 00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:43,760 And, yeah, if you lift up your... 537 00:31:43,800 --> 00:31:45,920 Oh. Pop this... 538 00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:47,400 ..there. 539 00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:50,520 Hold on. 540 00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:52,640 Shit, sorry. I think it might be dead. 541 00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:54,040 What? 542 00:31:54,080 --> 00:31:55,920 No, the battery. 543 00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:57,480 The battery. Oh. 544 00:31:57,520 --> 00:31:58,920 Sorry, I just... 545 00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:01,160 Oh, no, that's on. OK. 546 00:32:02,240 --> 00:32:03,640 Right. 547 00:32:10,280 --> 00:32:11,680 HEARTBEAT 548 00:32:11,720 --> 00:32:13,600 HE CHUCKLES Oh! 549 00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:15,080 Oh. 550 00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:16,960 Listen. 551 00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:19,360 Now, you can hear Baby whenever you want. 552 00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:21,120 Incredible. 553 00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:22,720 Thank you so much. 554 00:32:22,760 --> 00:32:25,880 Best wedding gift, bar none. 555 00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:29,440 Well, until the main present arrives in a few weeks. 556 00:32:29,480 --> 00:32:30,760 Of course. When are you due? 557 00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:33,360 Oh, no, I meant the Maserati from Greg. 558 00:32:33,400 --> 00:32:34,760 Yeah. 559 00:32:34,800 --> 00:32:36,320 It's got held up in Bologna. 560 00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:37,960 Long story. Hm. 561 00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:40,920 Shall we have a photo? 562 00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:43,960 No, no, no, I'm all right. Oh. HE CHUCKLES 563 00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:46,320 Oh. You have to look into the... 564 00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:48,800 Quite fast. Is...? SHE LAUGHS 565 00:32:48,840 --> 00:32:50,200 Yay! Oh. 566 00:32:50,240 --> 00:32:52,120 OK. Yeah. 567 00:32:53,960 --> 00:32:56,360 I am sorry Harry couldn't make it. 568 00:32:56,400 --> 00:32:58,520 I hope you can still enjoy the day. 569 00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:16,080 I'm really happy for you, Greg. 570 00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:17,600 Ah. 571 00:33:17,640 --> 00:33:19,920 Well, that was almost convincing. I mean it. 572 00:33:21,720 --> 00:33:23,600 Love is a very precious thing. 573 00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:25,200 All right, Richard Curtis. 574 00:33:26,480 --> 00:33:28,240 I'm sorry that Harry bailed. 575 00:33:29,840 --> 00:33:33,000 But that does mean that I can set you up with Ayo. 576 00:33:33,040 --> 00:33:34,960 He works in derivatives, and he's got a jawline 577 00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:36,760 you could cut tiles with. I'm fine. 578 00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:39,240 Thank you. 579 00:33:39,280 --> 00:33:42,000 Anyway, that would never work. Ayo Kay?! 580 00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:43,120 Gregorio! 581 00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:44,640 Ladam! 582 00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:46,520 Now, when am I up? Probably next... 583 00:33:46,560 --> 00:33:47,800 ..ten mins? Ah. 584 00:33:47,840 --> 00:33:49,040 Right, shall we? 585 00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:53,440 Oh, did you guys get a chance to chat about work stuff yet? 586 00:33:53,480 --> 00:33:55,880 Yeah, you got any jobs for washed-up doctors? 587 00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:57,200 Every day of the week, mate. 588 00:33:57,240 --> 00:33:59,960 I must have placed, like, three ex-doctors into proper, grown-up, 589 00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:02,760 six-figure roles - minimum hours, maximum dosh. 590 00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:04,680 Dream scenario. Really? 591 00:34:04,720 --> 00:34:05,840 Totalmente. 592 00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:08,280 I mean, think of all those transferable skills you've got. 593 00:34:08,320 --> 00:34:09,840 Pulling babies out of vaginas? 594 00:34:09,880 --> 00:34:11,240 Uno, problem solving. 595 00:34:11,280 --> 00:34:13,080 Duo, time management. 596 00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:15,680 Tru-o, empathy. 597 00:34:15,720 --> 00:34:17,520 Yeah, well, that's two out of three, then. 598 00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:19,320 GLASS CLINKS Ladies and gentlemen, 599 00:34:19,360 --> 00:34:20,920 if you could please take your seats 600 00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:22,920 as the evening speeches are about to commence. 601 00:34:22,960 --> 00:34:26,200 Just call the office, and we'll fix a meeting, yeah? Boom. 602 00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:32,440 Ding-dong, the legend's here. Hello, everybody. 603 00:34:32,480 --> 00:34:36,120 My name is Welly, AKA the well of all knowledge, 604 00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:39,520 and I am the best man to young Greg, here. 605 00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:43,040 Now, a lot of people worry, naturally, that marriage 606 00:34:43,080 --> 00:34:45,520 is the biggest mistake they'll ever make. 607 00:34:45,560 --> 00:34:47,520 Not our Greg, though, because on his gap year, 608 00:34:47,560 --> 00:34:49,480 he lost his virginity to a prostitute 609 00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:52,240 who looked like Pavarotti. HE LAUGHS 610 00:34:52,280 --> 00:34:54,160 Only cost him three TENORS. 611 00:34:54,200 --> 00:34:56,080 That was genius. 612 00:34:56,120 --> 00:35:00,800 # The book of love is long and boring 613 00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:04,520 # No-one can lift the damn thing 614 00:35:05,880 --> 00:35:10,560 # It's full of charts and facts and figures 615 00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:14,960 # And instructions for dancing 616 00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:19,800 # But I 617 00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:24,920 # I love it when you read to me... # 618 00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:27,240 So sorry I'm late. 619 00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:29,920 Isn't that MY line? 620 00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:32,240 Did you know there's more than one Farmborough? 621 00:35:33,520 --> 00:35:35,040 Yes. And they're not close. 622 00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:37,000 Look, I tried to text, but I ran out of credit. 623 00:35:37,040 --> 00:35:38,640 I don't care. 624 00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:41,160 I'm just... 625 00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:42,440 ..glad you're here. 626 00:35:43,920 --> 00:35:46,000 How much have I missed? Um... 627 00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:49,440 ..not enough. Come on. 628 00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:53,280 Isn't the wedding where all those people with dinner jackets are? 629 00:35:53,320 --> 00:35:55,040 Exactly. 630 00:35:55,080 --> 00:35:56,440 Come on. 631 00:36:01,920 --> 00:36:07,280 "In lieu of wedding favours, we have made a donation 632 00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:09,320 "of £50 per person 633 00:36:09,360 --> 00:36:12,240 "to Chipping Norton Donkey Sanctuary." 634 00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:15,120 I hate donkeys. 635 00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:17,600 Can I get the 50 quid for myself? How can you hate babies? 636 00:36:18,760 --> 00:36:21,360 You what? Baby horses. 637 00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:23,480 No, donkeys are not baby horses. 638 00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:26,520 Well, what are they, then? 639 00:36:27,680 --> 00:36:29,000 Donkeys. 640 00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:32,600 Oh. HE LAUGHS 641 00:36:32,640 --> 00:36:34,320 Well, I...I grew up in London. 642 00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:37,120 I...they...we didn't have any... Schools? 643 00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:43,040 What would your ideal wedding be? 644 00:36:44,280 --> 00:36:45,600 Oh. 645 00:36:47,800 --> 00:36:49,560 All right, OK, um... 646 00:36:51,720 --> 00:36:56,200 ..free booze, loads of people, like, everyone in my contacts list... 647 00:36:56,240 --> 00:36:57,600 Estate agent. 648 00:36:57,640 --> 00:36:59,360 HSBC. 649 00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:01,120 Yeah, they love a party. 650 00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:02,400 Um... 651 00:37:03,880 --> 00:37:06,120 ..massive curry, no speeches, 652 00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:07,720 karaoke, 653 00:37:07,760 --> 00:37:09,680 and a kebab at 3am. 654 00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:12,240 It sounds nice. 655 00:37:14,880 --> 00:37:17,080 HARRY LAUGHS 656 00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:21,080 Hm. We've finished it. 657 00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:27,200 You can't do that. 658 00:37:27,240 --> 00:37:29,640 Don't worry. I'll go and get it. 659 00:37:36,440 --> 00:37:39,000 Woo! What are you doing? 660 00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:41,120 Woo! Come on, Grandad. 661 00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:48,760 Jesus! 662 00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:51,480 Oh, this is cold. HE CHUCKLES 663 00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:53,960 Oh, God. 664 00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:56,560 Oh, oh, oh, oh. 665 00:37:56,600 --> 00:37:58,480 It's fresh. 666 00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:00,560 THEY LAUGH 667 00:38:03,640 --> 00:38:04,880 Go on, then. 668 00:38:07,200 --> 00:38:08,920 What would your ideal wedding be? 669 00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:13,160 Heated lake. 670 00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:15,640 Obviously. Obviously. 671 00:38:15,680 --> 00:38:18,920 And otherwise, the same as yours. 672 00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:24,200 Because I'd be marrying you. 673 00:38:30,240 --> 00:38:31,760 Adam... 674 00:38:33,960 --> 00:38:35,680 Tell me we weren't good together. 675 00:38:37,960 --> 00:38:41,680 We were good, but we were also quite bad. 676 00:38:41,720 --> 00:38:44,160 But the bad stuff was... 677 00:38:46,400 --> 00:38:48,000 ..that was all to do with my job. 678 00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:53,040 You know, medicine is not good for me. 679 00:38:54,720 --> 00:38:56,240 It's, um... 680 00:38:57,720 --> 00:38:59,600 ..it's ruined my life. 681 00:39:00,600 --> 00:39:02,360 And it destroyed us. 682 00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:03,960 I don't think it was... 683 00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:06,240 ..that simple. 684 00:39:08,000 --> 00:39:12,280 I'd like to say a few words. Dr Kay, you may sit back down. 685 00:39:12,320 --> 00:39:14,040 On the day in question, 686 00:39:14,080 --> 00:39:17,360 I was working alongside an SHO colleague 687 00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:19,640 called Shruti Acharya. 688 00:39:19,680 --> 00:39:21,240 Dr Kay... 689 00:39:21,280 --> 00:39:25,240 She asked me to review the patient in triage, 690 00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:28,440 and then she assisted me with the caesarean. 691 00:39:30,000 --> 00:39:31,680 Dr Acharya has since... 692 00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:40,480 Dr Acharya has since taken her own life. 693 00:39:42,840 --> 00:39:44,240 On the morning she died, 694 00:39:44,280 --> 00:39:49,680 Shruti found out she'd passed her Obs and Gynae membership exams, 695 00:39:49,720 --> 00:39:53,200 exams she worked ridiculously hard for... 696 00:39:54,640 --> 00:39:56,640 ..on top of the 90-hour weeks, 697 00:39:56,680 --> 00:39:58,480 on top of this complaint. 698 00:39:59,880 --> 00:40:03,000 But she didn't see this as a success. 699 00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:09,080 The idea of carrying on working in a broken system 700 00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:13,560 under shoddy conditions didn't feel like any kind of future. 701 00:40:16,160 --> 00:40:17,840 She was a great doctor. 702 00:40:20,520 --> 00:40:23,840 Kind, focused, determined. 703 00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:27,320 And it was still too much for her. 704 00:40:31,240 --> 00:40:33,080 It's too much for anyone. 705 00:40:34,560 --> 00:40:36,520 I mean, you saw what it... 706 00:40:36,560 --> 00:40:38,120 ..what it turned me into. 707 00:40:41,320 --> 00:40:44,200 I don't know if I can do it any more. 708 00:40:44,240 --> 00:40:46,040 Don't leave medicine for me. 709 00:40:49,960 --> 00:40:51,680 One doctor, 710 00:40:51,720 --> 00:40:54,160 in this country, takes their own life 711 00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:55,760 every three weeks. 712 00:40:57,400 --> 00:41:00,120 And it should be a national fucking headline every time it happens, 713 00:41:00,160 --> 00:41:02,560 and instead it's just brushed under the carpet. 714 00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:08,000 Doctors, nurses, midwives, pharmacists, physios, 715 00:41:08,040 --> 00:41:09,880 a million and a half of them... 716 00:41:13,160 --> 00:41:15,560 ..they don't do this for the money, 717 00:41:15,600 --> 00:41:17,920 for the kudos, for the anything. 718 00:41:20,160 --> 00:41:21,800 They do it because they care. 719 00:41:23,040 --> 00:41:25,960 Day in, day out, going the extra mile 720 00:41:26,000 --> 00:41:28,200 to keep the rest of us on the road. 721 00:41:28,240 --> 00:41:31,000 That's a pretty fucking special thing. 722 00:41:33,640 --> 00:41:37,080 And you could do yourselves a favour to remember that once in a while. 723 00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:47,680 You know, I... 724 00:41:51,320 --> 00:41:52,680 ..I really miss you. 725 00:41:58,160 --> 00:41:59,440 I know. 726 00:42:02,360 --> 00:42:05,040 This is the bit where you say that you miss me, too. 727 00:42:05,080 --> 00:42:06,520 Yeah, I do. 728 00:42:07,920 --> 00:42:09,560 Well, if you miss me, then... 729 00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:13,480 ..let's just...let's... 730 00:42:13,520 --> 00:42:15,320 Why don't we give it another go? 731 00:42:16,400 --> 00:42:17,960 A proper go. 732 00:42:19,960 --> 00:42:21,560 When you get all of me. 733 00:42:28,520 --> 00:42:30,120 But it's what you do. 734 00:42:32,480 --> 00:42:34,320 Being a doctor, it's who you are. 735 00:42:35,760 --> 00:42:37,160 Put your hand on your heart, 736 00:42:37,200 --> 00:42:39,360 and tell me you want to give all that up. 737 00:43:00,560 --> 00:43:02,120 I don't think I can. 738 00:43:07,120 --> 00:43:08,480 It's OK. 739 00:43:14,360 --> 00:43:15,760 It's OK. 740 00:43:32,800 --> 00:43:34,840 HE SIGHS 741 00:43:46,840 --> 00:43:48,360 WOMAN: Call an ambulance! 742 00:43:48,400 --> 00:43:50,160 Can't call an ambulance at a hospital. 743 00:43:50,200 --> 00:43:51,880 Get someone, then! 744 00:43:54,000 --> 00:43:55,480 Hello. 745 00:43:55,520 --> 00:43:57,040 I'm Adam. I'm one of the doctors. 746 00:43:57,080 --> 00:43:59,560 What kind of a doctor? Doesn't matter what kind! 747 00:43:59,600 --> 00:44:01,000 Right, hello. 748 00:44:01,040 --> 00:44:03,120 Baby's just sitting there, ready to come out. 749 00:44:03,160 --> 00:44:05,240 Probably best if we finish what you've started. 750 00:44:05,280 --> 00:44:07,240 Next contraction, give me a nice big push. 751 00:44:07,280 --> 00:44:09,440 Have you got anything to put down on the seats? 752 00:44:09,480 --> 00:44:11,600 Oh, is that ever going to come out of the upholstery? 753 00:44:11,640 --> 00:44:13,720 SHE SCREAMS Honestly, Tim! 754 00:44:13,760 --> 00:44:15,200 Shoelaces. 755 00:44:15,240 --> 00:44:17,520 You're doing so well. Nearly there. Nearly there. 756 00:44:17,560 --> 00:44:18,760 SHE WHIMPERS 757 00:44:18,800 --> 00:44:20,840 Push, push. Push, push, push! 758 00:44:20,880 --> 00:44:22,480 Here we go. 759 00:44:22,520 --> 00:44:24,560 SHE WAILS 760 00:44:24,600 --> 00:44:26,600 BABY CRIES 761 00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:29,440 Congratulations. 762 00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:31,880 Oh! 763 00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:33,480 Laces. 764 00:44:35,680 --> 00:44:37,520 Something to cut the cord? 765 00:44:40,240 --> 00:44:41,800 Hi. 766 00:44:47,160 --> 00:44:48,960 What do we do now? 767 00:44:49,000 --> 00:44:51,320 I think you have to feed it for a few years, 768 00:44:51,360 --> 00:44:53,800 let it live in your house, and then send it to school. 769 00:44:55,400 --> 00:44:57,960 Right, labour ward's on the second floor 770 00:44:58,000 --> 00:44:59,880 of that building there. Um... 771 00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:03,680 ..just give me a minute, and I'll get you up there. 772 00:45:03,720 --> 00:45:05,520 Thank you so much, Dr... 773 00:45:05,560 --> 00:45:07,600 Adam's a good name. 774 00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:15,560 Oh. 775 00:45:15,600 --> 00:45:16,680 For fuck's sake. 776 00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:19,840 # This is going to sting 777 00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:23,600 # This is going to slay you 778 00:45:24,960 --> 00:45:27,360 # This is going to break your heart 779 00:45:28,440 --> 00:45:30,600 # It's going to tear you apart 780 00:45:32,040 --> 00:45:34,160 # It's going to make your eyes water 781 00:45:35,520 --> 00:45:38,160 # Oh, it's a major, major trauma 782 00:45:39,720 --> 00:45:41,600 # Yes, this is going to hurt 783 00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:45,560 # Hurt me more than love. #