[TV static drones]
[bright tone]
[soft acoustic guitar]
[The Milk Carton Kids' "Younger Years"]
♪ ♪
both: ♪ Above the plains of Omaha ♪
♪ I think of all the sufferin' I saw ♪
♪ ♪
♪ The soakin' of the pavement ♪
♪ Sprawled upon a land without a law ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Everythin' I loved ♪
♪ Everythin' I found what I hoped for ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Frightened and surrounded ♪
♪ Who else is there to turn to anymore? ♪
♪ ♪
- Aunt May-May, Cousin Karl,
I gotta tell y'all, Peter Montgomery
is a evil Skeletor.
He is a very gross person to be related to.
- Worst uncle ever.
And that's saying a lot in this family.
- I'm just glad you guys are okay.
- Yeah, we are, thanks to you.
But no thanks to Daddy.
Pretty bold move not to make that ransom payment,
Dr. Elijah Gemstone.
I'm just curious,
what the fuck was going on in your head
when you made that call?
- I thought he was bluffing. - Bluffing?
You'd make a piss-poor poker player, muchacho.
- I guess I still remember the old Peter.
I hoped that man was somewhere inside him still.
- [imitating mockingly]
[scoffs] Daddy, you know what?
Next time, save your gut feelings
and your hopes for the horses, okay, Daddy boy?
Your kids' lives were in danger.
- Well, he has no idea what we went through.
- I almost pooed in a bucket, Daddy.
- I hate what you had to endure.
- Damn ass little daddy. I'm so sick of you.
- How am I the bad guy in this?
- You're not the bad guy in this, Uncle Eli--I am.
And I'm really sorry.
I'm gonna do what I can to make this right, guys.
At least you're owning it, Karl.
You hear that, Daddy?
Karl's being a big boy.
And as somebody who has recently fucked up,
I know how hard it is to do what you just did
by saying you're sorry.
So apology accepted.
- I forgive you, too, K-dog.
We all make mistakes.
But you, you on the good team now.
- Karl, I think even I'm ready to forgive you,
because you stepped up.
But fuck Chuck.
Next time I see him, I'll end his life
if he doesn't end mine first.
- Nobody's killing nobody. - We'll see.
- Flying off the handle won't help.
- Dr. Gemstone, I don't take advice from you no mo'.
At this moment, I am not in the mood
to discuss this any further.
Perhaps we can make an arrangement
sometime in the future.
- What are you looking at?
- I'm not talking to him anymore.
- Mm-hmm. - Oh. Okay.
Well, then that's what I'm gonna do too.
Ignored.
- ♪ Praise ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Praise ♪
[tense music]
♪ ♪
- Cops gonna be all over this place.
Y'all need to move faster.
- His damn fault we gotta move in the first place.
Can't believe your brother ran off with our hostages.
Y'all couldn't stop him?
- Karl's a big boy.
I'd like to see you try stopping him.
- Well, if it was me, I would've shot him.
- [groans]
- Spent all that time worrying about 'em
when they was kidnapped;
now they don't even wanna see me.
I'm sorry, May-May.
I've said terrible things about you.
I've said terrible things about your sons
and about your family.
Then you almost--
nearly got yourself killed trying to save my kids.
- Our kids.
Don't beat yourself up.
Ain't like I'm not accustomed to you being an asshole, Eli.
It's sorta your default. It don't shake me none.
[pensive music]
- Haven't always been kind to you, have I?
- Well, you've been as kind to me
as I've been to you.
We just don't blow smoke up each other's butts
like other people do, that's all.
I don't begrudge you for that.
- I don't begrudge you, neither.
I guess that's just how we do each other.
- That's right.
[chuckles]
- Come here. - Oh.
All right.
[horns honking]
[tense music]
♪ ♪
- [groans] What's he doing?
Does Peter even know where the hell he's going?
- Can Peter fucking drive?
♪ ♪
- Hey, Peter!
You think maybe we could have a plan or something?
Don't even gotta be a good one.
- You know, you sound like a woman
the way you piss and moan.
- I'm acting like a woman? - Yeah.
- You drive that damn U-Haul like a woman!
- You're the woman! - Stop calling me a woman!
You being a damn woman right now!
- Oh, yeah, woman? - Stop calling me a woman!
- You woman!
- Can we please stop talking
about who's a woman for a minute
and figure out where we're gonna go?
- I know where we're going! God!
Everybody gather 'round!
Get--all right, we're gonna pray!
Roll your eyes to the Lord? Wow.
All right.
Bow your heads--all of you!
[apprehensive music]
Dear heavenly Father.
We ask for your guidance today.
Calm these men and a woman of their anxieties.
Give them the courage to obey my commands.
Let them know that if they don't listen to me,
they're going against your word,
'cause I'm the keeper of your word.
And anyone who challenges me challenges you, dear Lord,
and any challengers of you get sent straight to hell.
In Jesus' name we pray, amen.
[both spit]
- The whole time you were in captivity,
I would light candles and just cry
while praying to God that if I ever got to see you again,
I would do everything I could to be a good husband.
- Oh, BJ.
You're the best fucking husband I ever could've imagined.
And believe me, I imagined quite a few--
Ryan Phillippe, Savion Glover the tap dancer.
But you're better than all of them.
You're perfect.
- I actually started thinking that maybe
all this stuff happened because
I wasn't enough for you?
- No.
BJ, come on. You're more than enough.
I don't know, I got wrapped up in all of it.
In being a famous singer, in being a boss of the church.
I lost myself.
- We're allowed to make mistakes.
Just as long as at the end of the day,
we have each other's back.
I will always have your back.
- And I will always have yours.
Now, if I've learned one thing from you,
it's that no matter how crazy life gets
or turned upside-down,
sometimes, the best way to reset
is with a really good, deep fucking.
- Well, I could use a nice reset.
- We both could.
[gentle music]
- Oh, no. Son, are you okay?
- I don't know, Daddy. I think I might be drowning.
- Oh, my gosh, I wish I had a chopper.
- You do, Daddy. And it's right here.
[imitating helicopter blades]
- [laughing]
- It's time to take the controls, Daddy.
- Yeah, I'm gonna fly the chopper
with my mouth.
[laughing]
- It was so scary, Keefe.
There were times I thought I was gonna lose my mind.
Go mad.
- You know, I can tell.
I can feel that stress and tightness
up here in your traps
all the way down to your glutes.
- And our fight, by the way?
100% my fault.
- [sighs]
- I was such an A-hole. - It's okay, brother.
I was just a bit jolted to see you and Taryn
working so closely so quickly right after I left.
So are, uh, you two dating?
Spread. - Nah.
She ain't my type.
Plus, I hated all the forced claps
and laughter and fun times.
I like doing claps and laughters with you.
- [chuckles] Yeah. Same here.
I love getting the children all zazzed up
and excited to learn about Jesus with you.
- Yeah. Totes agree.
I mean, Taryn was nice and all, but she's not you.
- She tried to be me,
but it was a failed try.
- Bring 'em down, bring 'em down,
my little bird boxes.
And halt. Remove the blindfolds.
Surprise! - Holy shit!
New 4-wheelers? - You're damn right.
I got one for each of you.
Put your names on 'em and everything.
- These things are so sick! Thanks, Dad.
- Yeah, well, you're welcome, my sweet family.
You know, after being kidnapped, uh,
I don't know, I just feel anew.
Just generous, like a changed man.
- Yeah, we noticed the change.
The silver chops are back.
- Silver chops? What are those?
- Your sideburns. They're gray again.
- Gideon, I appreciate your heroics in a pinch,
but your attention to detail is way off.
These burns always been gray, fella.
- No, I remember 'em black too.
Like, too black.
- Two big, black dicks
dangling down the sides of your face.
At least you're back to being your old self now.
An old fart.
- Aw. [chuckles]
Well, better an old fart than a young piece of shit
who's made terrible life choices.
Like putting damn Super Mario Brothers
on your fucking arm. - It's Stalin.
- It's stupid. - Jesse.
What is all this?
- I was insecure.
Felt like I didn't earn my place.
That made me threatened to share a stage
with my siblings, and even share a stage with you.
I was being a shitty little bitch
about The System because it's a hit.
I was afraid it was gonna take
some of your attention away from me.
And that's a fucked-up thing to think.
I support you, and I'm proud of you.
Thanks for having patience and for making me
the man I am today.
You know, with age comes wisdom.
- Hmm.
Except in Eli's case.
Him choosing not to pay that ransom.
I cannot believe that he did that.
- Gideon, next time you see your granddaddy,
I want you to tell him that I think
that he's a money-hungry bitch.
- I'll try to express that in my own words,
or maybe just in a softer way.
- And if he fucking tries to come back
and tries to talk shit about me...
- Mm-hmm. Mm. - Just crack his face.
- I'm not gonna do that.
- Daddy bonds are stronger than granddaddy bonds.
Don't forget that.
[truck horn blaring]
[tense music]
♪ ♪
- Uh, Pa? - What?
- Uh, Marshall here has some things
he wants to talk to you about. - No distractions.
Can't you see I'm trying to build a detonator here?
- Peter, uh, we're all just a little concerned.
Seems like your whole operation is slipping a little bit.
- Oh, slipping, huh?
What, because we left a dilapidated farm?
Uh, that's called "smart," Marshall.
That's called "staying ahead of the opposition," okay?
Strategic thinking. - Maybe.
But, uh, you know,
since we ain't got a damn shot at that ransom money now,
we just all kinda curious
what exactly your plan is going forward?
- Well, I'd say, uh,
5,000 pounds of ammonium nitrate
in the back of this truck here.
- Yeah. Cool.
Well, maybe it's time to try out
some other fellers' ideas since, you know,
yours don't seem to really be working.
- [laughs]
Is this about your dumbass statue protest again?
- You think it's dumb.
I think it's important.
- Why would you travel around the country
protesting statues?
That is the silliest thing I have ever heard in my life.
- We ain't protesting statues, Peter.
We're protesting the people protesting the statues.
These are monuments.
It's our culture and our heritage.
- Hey, nobody cares
about your stupid bullshit ideas, Marshall!
That will be all.
Return to your quarters.
- We ain't got no damn quarters, Peter.
- Well, then go s--
sit in your fucking truck and cool off!
♪ ♪
- So that's how you talk to guys
you've known since prison now, huh?
- No, that's how I talk to ungrateful dummies.
Which is what you are.
- [sighs]
Do you think that was wise, Pa?
You let me worry about that, all right?
- Shoot me straight, Gideon.
Your dad's still pretty sore at me, isn't he?
- I think he's just been tired and maybe a little bit moody
'cause of everything he's been through.
- Well, I hope he knows, I hope you know
that I would've paid if I thought
their lives were in danger.
I knew they weren't.
- You don't have to explain to me, Granddad.
I trust you.
Everybody got home safe.
- I can see why you wanna get away
from this family from time to time.
Without your grandma, it's a pretty toxic affair.
It's not that I wanna get away from the family.
I just wanna carve my own path.
Figure out what the hell it is I intend to do with my life.
- You mean you don't wanna drive your old granddad around
for the rest of your life?
- [laughs]
There are worse things to do.
- Yeah, there's a lot better things to do too. [laughs]
I'll tell you, when I was a young man your age,
I never would've imagined myself
becoming a preacher.
That's a fact.
But you never know where life's journey is gonna take you.
[metal ratchets] - [sighs]
[indistinct chatter]
[soft suspenseful music]
♪ ♪
[phone buzzing]
- Chuck, what's going on? - We moved.
I won't say where we are, so don't ask.
You really upset Pa, you know that?
You all escaping put us
in a real bad spot with the militia.
Everything's falling apart.
Some of 'em probably wanna put a bullet
in Daddy's back now.
- Chuck, just come home.
- No.
What about Mama?
Is she sore at me?
I wasn't really gonna shoot nobody.
Would you tell her that for me?
- She knows that, Chuckie.
Just come back, please?
I miss you. [phone beeps]
♪ ♪
- Hmm. - Howdy.
- What's up? - 'Sup what's up?
What the hell is all this?
- Yeah, that's what I was gonna say.
I ain't never been here on a weekday before.
I'm like, "Where the hell's the big table?"
- Yeah, I guess they bring the big table in
just for us special on Sundays.
- Yeah.
It's crazy being back, isn't it?
You all been able to slip back into your old lives?
- Real talk, dude?
It's better than before I got kidnapped.
- Makes everything snap into focus, that's for sure.
- Yeah. I feel the same way.
Like I can be more honest, you know?
True to myself.
- Yeah, I can tell you're going through some truthful stuff
'cause you got those gray chops back.
[both laugh]
- I guess I didn't realize how old they make you look.
You look old, dude.
You know, I can totally see why you were dyeing them.
- Okay, well, if you two are finished
discussing the tones of my hair,
I'd like to discus something a little more serious.
Our father, Elijah?
He does not love us.
All he cares about is money.
That's the harsh truth
that you two need to get your heads around.
Look, all of us know that our daddy's a dickhead, okay?
both: Yeah. - That is a fucking pill
that we always have known we have to swallow.
- Yes.
- But we can't think about that anymore.
Because now is the time for us to join together
to evolve into the independent,
free-thinking church leaders that the three
have-have been here to always to know.
- Oh, my God, what the fuck are you blathering about?
- I am so lost right now.
- I'm supposed to go back to church this Sunday.
With everything that's happened,
it just seems like it'd be kinda lame
for me to be up there by myself.
Now, I know you two quit your jobs.
I just wanted to see if maybe
you were having second thoughts.
Maybe consider coming back to the church.
[soft tense music]
- I don't know who the hell else you're gonna get.
Let me tell you this: we're family,
and I'm not gonna leave you in the lurch.
- Word. Kelvin?
You take back your quitting?
- God dang, Kelvin.
Don't be trying to take a long time to answer.
- I'm not taking a long time. I'm choosing my words.
And I've chosen them.
I take back my declaration to quit. [laughs]
I can't let you two go up there and hog it all for yourselves.
- Yeah! Put 'er there. Hands on hands.
- No, Jesse. - Mm-mm.
Hands hold hands.
- Hands hold hands?
But we're not that kind of family.
We never have been. We're hands on hands.
- Maybe it's time we shake some things up.
[soft dramatic music]
♪ ♪
[both exhale]
- [laughs]
- Holy shit.
Are we doing it?
- I think we're doing it.
- We're fucking holding hands.
- Ooh! Ooh!
- Will it work if we hold them high?
[all shout]
[laughter]
- Did y'all jizz?
- No?
- Uh... - Me neither.
- Surprise, surprise, chicken and fries!
Got good eats for everybody.
- Fast food?
Is that all we're getting to eat?
- Hey, Peter, can I have two Fancy Sandies?
- Everybody gets one sandwich, one fry, and one shake.
- Why can't I have two sandies, huh?
- 'Cause nobody gets two!
- I'm hungry.
- I said no, Jacob!
We gotta ration what we have, fellas.
Come on.
- We was supposed to get 15 million cash,
and now we can't even barely afford fast food.
That about sums it up.
[militia murmuring agreement]
Boys, we have officially accomplished
zero of our goals.
- Wrong!
We haven't accomplished our goals yet.
Your minds are weak with greed.
The devil has you salivating for cash.
Come on--we can still accomplish our goals.
- Now, why would we wanna do that now, huh?
Like, why would we wanna be out under a-a overpass
when we can't even eat a solid meal?
Like, why? [militia murmuring agreement]
- Wow, Jacob.
You too. - Just don't seem worth it.
- All right, we wouldn't even be dealing with this shit
if you hadn't let the fucking Gemstones escape.
[militia shouting agreement]
- Well, well, Marshall.
Congratulations-- you turned 'em all against me.
- We want you gone, Peter.
That's right.
You and Chuck.
We're seizing militia funds to start a new group.
The Keepers of Yesterday's Monuments.
[militia shouting agreement]
- Statue protests, that's what you're spending money on.
Statue protests. Call it what it is, okay?
So you gonna take all the funds,
you gonna take the truck, the explosives,
and just leave us with nothing, huh?
- Oh, we're taking the money,
but nobody gives a shit
about your little truck filled with firecrackers.
[laughter]
- All right, let's get out of here, Chuck.
I--we don't wanna stick around where we're not wanted.
- Take care, Peter. Fucking bye, man.
You drive save now.
- Fuck outta the way.
Fuckers.
Dickheads!
[tense music]
[shouts]
- Well, Dr. Gemstone,
I wanna thank you very much for coming here.
Now, as you know, I am Jesse's spiritual mentor at the church.
I advise all these children of yours.
Part of that duty is helping them
to navigate very, very difficult conversations.
- Kids, we don't have to talk through Baby Billy.
You can talk to me.
- [whispering indistinctly]
- Eli, the Gemstone progeny is very, very angry
that you were unwilling to pay the ransom
when they was being held hostage.
Now, I got to say that I-- I was taken aback, too, Eli.
I mean, these are your children now.
- I'm not doing this.
I know y'all got issues with me.
Say what you're gonna say. I'm right here.
- Daddy, you left us to die.
Uncle Peter would've definitely killed any one of us,
if not all three.
Or he'd just mutilate us and start mailing you
our body parts little by little.
- Nipples, penis, butthole shavings.
All our tender bits, Daddy. - Hold on, now.
I advise you to speak through me.
- Baby Bill, stay out of this.
- Uncle Peter's right about you.
All you care about is money.
I thought you cared about the church,
but seeing as how you just threw us into the deep end
and let us sink or swim without giving a shit,
I see it has nothing to do with the church.
You just about that money, boy.
- You're right about the church
not being the most important thing,
but it's not money.
[sentimental music]
You're the most important thing to me.
Maybe sometimes it don't feel that way,
but it's true.
I only care about the money because it ensures you kids
will always have the life your mama and I wanted for you.
♪ ♪
[all make farting noise]
- That's some sentimental-ass bullshit right there.
- Not buying it. - Phony baloney.
- What the fuck are you smiling at?
What's so funny?
- Look at you three.
You're doing it.
You're working together.
[chuckles]
If it takes hating on me as a common enemy,
so be it. It's for your own good.
Hate me if you want to.
If it means you work as a unified team,
I can die happy.
Thank you, kids.
This was nice.
♪ ♪
[chuckling]
- Okay, what? What just happened?
- Why the hell's he leaving? Where's he going?
- Did he win or did we win?
What are you smiling at?
- Now, I advised you to speak through me, now.
- Okay, Billy, you ain't no damn lawyer.
- I was a paralegal once
in another life, for your information.
- Paraplegic. Pfft.
- Paraplegic? Watch this.
Walk right the fuck outta here is what I'm gonna do.
How about this?
Can a paraplegic do this?
- Oh, God dang.
- They gonna give us the boot?
Well, let's see how that works out for 'em.
[exciting music]
[indistinct chatter]
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
- ♪ Step into the light ♪
♪ Let his love shine in your eyes ♪
[cheers and applause]
♪ For our righteous lives ♪
♪ So alive ♪
- They're cheering for us.
- Look, they're even up in the high seats.
- Yeah, they are. - This is nuts.
Why'd they even come?
- What do you think?
They wanna hear about our struggle.
We can finally play the victim.
- ♪ When there is nothing left to say ♪
♪ And all the clouds have faded away ♪
♪ And my mind wanders out there ♪
[sirens wailing]
[shouting]
♪ Just to be there in the morning ♪
♪ With the sun coming through the trees ♪
♪ Well, you know there ain't no other place ♪
♪ I'd rather be ♪
♪ ♪
♪ Sunday sunny Mill Valley groove day ♪
♪ ♪
♪ You can feel the magic in the air ♪
♪ ♪
♪ And when it's over ♪
♪ And the clover has left the mountainside ♪
♪ ♪
♪ You'll be king ♪
♪ Of what you survive ♪
- Where are we going, Pa?
- Going to church, Chuck.
♪ ♪
- ♪ Sunday sunny Mill Valley groove day ♪
- [whistling]
[tense music]
[choir vocalizing]
♪ ♪
[bright tone]