1
00:00:02,461 --> 00:00:04,421
DUNCAN: "It's laughter we're after"?

2
00:00:04,505 --> 00:00:06,590
That's the best
college boy could come up with?

3
00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:07,799
No, no, no.

4
00:00:07,883 --> 00:00:09,510
I can do better. Okay. Okay.

5
00:00:09,593 --> 00:00:11,094
How about, "Making kids laugh

6
00:00:11,178 --> 00:00:13,430
"is the contractual responsibility
of our staff"?

7
00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:14,556
Ah? (CHUCKLES)

8
00:00:14,640 --> 00:00:17,434
I got a better one for ya, four eyes.
How about this?

9
00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:18,810
"Laughter lights up your life

10
00:00:18,894 --> 00:00:22,439
"like an oxyacetylene blowtorch
with a multi-flame tip." Ow!

11
00:00:22,523 --> 00:00:24,608
Thank you. You're welcome.

12
00:00:25,317 --> 00:00:27,528
Mom, you didn't need to drive me.
I could've walked.

13
00:00:27,611 --> 00:00:30,113
I wanted to make sure
your second day started better.

14
00:00:30,197 --> 00:00:33,659
-I know, I get it. It's okay. Stop it.
-Just hold on a second. Here we go.

15
00:00:33,742 --> 00:00:36,870
-Stop! Mom...
-That's my little baby behemoth.

16
00:00:36,954 --> 00:00:39,373
I've got a plan.
Comedy class on my lunch breaks,

17
00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:41,250
and I'm gonna get on that Laugh Floor.

18
00:00:41,333 --> 00:00:45,963
This whole crazy MIFT thing
is just a temporary nightmare. Okay?

19
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:47,548
The Monsters Inc. Facilities Team?

20
00:00:47,631 --> 00:00:49,550
They can't be
as weird as you said they were.

21
00:00:49,633 --> 00:00:53,136
-Mom, I...
-FRITZ: MIFTer! MIFTer!

22
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:56,890
What's that I hear?
Oh, it's the call of the fledgling MIFTer.

23
00:00:56,974 --> 00:00:58,392
-Oh, boy.
-VAL: What's up, MIFToid?

24
00:00:58,475 --> 00:01:00,435
MIFTonian. MIFTied. MIFTerone.

25
00:01:00,519 --> 00:01:03,605
-Yeah, we get it.
-And who is this lovely lady?

26
00:01:03,689 --> 00:01:05,190
Thank you. That's enough. We get it.

27
00:01:05,274 --> 00:01:06,859
You didn't tell me you had a sister.

28
00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:08,527
It's my mom.

29
00:01:08,610 --> 00:01:11,864
-Enchanté, Tylor's very sister-like Mom.
-(MILLIE GIGGLES)

30
00:01:11,947 --> 00:01:14,491
Mama Tuskmon? So nice to meet you.

31
00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:17,202
I'm Val, Tylor's old college buddy
and new BFF.

32
00:01:17,286 --> 00:01:18,287
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

33
00:01:18,370 --> 00:01:20,080
-This is Val. This is Fritz.
-Enchanté.

34
00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:22,291
Everyone's met. We're good.
And you know what?

35
00:01:22,374 --> 00:01:24,209
Why don't I just see you guys inside?

36
00:01:24,293 --> 00:01:27,337
Oh, you bet you're gonna see us inside.

37
00:01:27,838 --> 00:01:29,214
Why are you blinking?

38
00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:30,299
That was a wink

39
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:34,011
because of the subtext
of what comes next inside.

40
00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:35,095
Wink-wink.

41
00:01:35,179 --> 00:01:36,430
(FRITZ AND VAL GIGGLING)

42
00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:38,390
MIFTer! MIFTer!

43
00:01:38,473 --> 00:01:41,101
Okay, I'll admit it. They're weird.

44
00:01:41,185 --> 00:01:43,187
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

45
00:02:13,884 --> 00:02:17,304
Hey, guys, that thing out front just now
with the winking and the blinking,

46
00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:21,725
bird calls, the super weird vibe
with my mom...

47
00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:23,644
(STUTTERS)

48
00:02:23,727 --> 00:02:24,728
Hello?

49
00:02:25,604 --> 00:02:28,065
Hello? Anybody?

50
00:02:29,233 --> 00:02:30,734
(GROWLS)

51
00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:34,196
FRITZ: MIFTer!

52
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:38,283
MIFTer!

53
00:02:42,621 --> 00:02:43,622
MIFTer!

54
00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:49,628
MIFTer!

55
00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:50,796
(CHUCKLES)

56
00:02:51,755 --> 00:02:52,840
Hello?

57
00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:55,634
(DOOR CLOSES)

58
00:02:57,135 --> 00:03:00,222
FRITZ: Young neophyte
Handy of duct tape

59
00:03:00,305 --> 00:03:04,685
Swift of repair
I welcome you to MIFT

60
00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:07,604
Yes, MIFT.

61
00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:09,857
Since the day
Monsters Incorporated was founded,

62
00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:13,402
there was a need,
a need for monsters behind the monsters.

63
00:03:13,485 --> 00:03:14,945
The unsung heroes.

64
00:03:15,571 --> 00:03:17,322
ALL: M-I-F-T.

65
00:03:17,406 --> 00:03:19,366
If a part breaks, we fix it.

66
00:03:19,449 --> 00:03:22,452
If a machine needs maintenance,
we maintain it.

67
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:25,122
This elite squad
of polished professionals,

68
00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:27,749
each of them an expert in their fields.

69
00:03:27,833 --> 00:03:29,084
They are the girdles...

70
00:03:29,168 --> 00:03:30,252
-"Girdles"?
-Girders.

71
00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:31,420
-Griddles...
-"Griddles"?

72
00:03:31,503 --> 00:03:33,213
...upon which the factory stands.

73
00:03:33,297 --> 00:03:34,631
And it's a very big factory.

74
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:35,883
Sorry, I'm not sure I...

75
00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:39,720
But before we proceed,
a few last words from our initiate.

76
00:03:39,803 --> 00:03:41,180
Oh, oh.

77
00:03:41,263 --> 00:03:42,764
This is an initiation ceremony.

78
00:03:42,848 --> 00:03:44,933
Hey, guys,
this is all just temporary. So...

79
00:03:45,017 --> 00:03:47,686
-So you're leaving?
-In a cardboard tube, most likely.

80
00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:50,147
Just like Rodney
after that hydraulic press incident.

81
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:51,523
Flat Rodney.

82
00:03:51,607 --> 00:03:53,692
-VAL: Coming through!
-FRITZ: Behold,

83
00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:57,446
you will now signify your readiness
for everlasting membership.

84
00:03:57,529 --> 00:03:58,614
-"Everlasting"?
-VAL: Yeah!

85
00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:01,450
Your first sacred tool.

86
00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:02,784
(TOOL WHIRRING)

87
00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:05,621
Ah, that's where I left it.

88
00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:12,753
-Tylor, I beseech you, wrench the nut.
-Uh...

89
00:04:12,836 --> 00:04:17,049
-Wrench the nut.
-ALL: Wrench the nut.

90
00:04:17,132 --> 00:04:19,885
What kind of nut are we talking about?
'Cause I have an allergy.

91
00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:21,386
-FRITZ: Wrench the nut.
-I don't...

92
00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:22,471
No, no nuts. I don't want...

93
00:04:22,554 --> 00:04:24,139
I want nothing to do with this nut.

94
00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:26,266
ALL: Wrench the nut.

95
00:04:26,350 --> 00:04:27,351
Okay, fine, fine, fine.

96
00:04:27,434 --> 00:04:29,394
If it'll make you stop chanting, (SIGHS)

97
00:04:29,478 --> 00:04:30,896
I'll wrench the nut.

98
00:04:32,356 --> 00:04:34,024
-ALL: Wrench the nut.
-TYLOR: Okay.

99
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:37,945
ALL: Wrench the nut. Wrench the nut.

100
00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:39,029
-Uh...
-FRITZ: Wrench...

101
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:40,113
CUTTER: Uh-oh.

102
00:04:41,990 --> 00:04:44,243
(NUT CLATTERS)

103
00:04:57,381 --> 00:04:58,382
Good enough.

104
00:04:58,966 --> 00:05:01,468
You have now endured
the ordeal of the nut,

105
00:05:01,552 --> 00:05:03,804
and you will cross over into MIFThood.

106
00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:06,056
-I don't wanna cross anything.
-Young tenderfoot,

107
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:08,267
cross through the door
of eternal membership.

108
00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:09,893
"Eternal." No, that sounds long.

109
00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:12,354
Guided by the candle
of infinite commitment

110
00:05:12,437 --> 00:05:13,605
and be cleansed

111
00:05:13,689 --> 00:05:16,275
-by the flames of no return!
-"Flames"?

112
00:05:16,358 --> 00:05:18,026
I love this part!

113
00:05:20,904 --> 00:05:22,030
(EXHALES)

114
00:05:22,114 --> 00:05:23,574
We used to use real flames.

115
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,909
Until Carl took a misstep to the right.

116
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:27,119
Lit up like the sun.

117
00:05:27,202 --> 00:05:30,038
Catastrophic, yet beautiful.

118
00:05:30,122 --> 00:05:33,041
This is crazy, okay?
Your ceremony is crazy.

119
00:05:33,125 --> 00:05:34,877
As long as we're throwing out crazy ideas,

120
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,795
I got one for you guys. I'm gonna leave.

121
00:05:36,879 --> 00:05:40,424
You're on your way
to a lifelong membership in MIFT.

122
00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:43,177
-No! No! No!
-FRITZ: Do not feel unworthy!

123
00:05:43,260 --> 00:05:44,761
Cross through the door!

124
00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:46,930
-ALL: Cross through the door!
-I don't wanna do this.

125
00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:49,725
No, no. No "door."
No "cross." No! No "eternal."

126
00:05:49,808 --> 00:05:52,978
Cross over and become...

127
00:05:53,061 --> 00:05:54,271
One of us!

128
00:05:56,523 --> 00:05:58,609
FRITZ: Oh, another power outage.

129
00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:00,861
And just when it was getting good.

130
00:06:00,944 --> 00:06:02,446
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

131
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:03,614
This keeps happening.

132
00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:05,866
That's the second
power outage today, Sulley.

133
00:06:05,949 --> 00:06:08,994
All the jokesters we have
are working multiple shifts.

134
00:06:09,077 --> 00:06:10,454
(YELPS AND GRUNTS)

135
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:11,747
You got this, Phlegm!

136
00:06:11,830 --> 00:06:14,041
Thanks, Celia. (GROANS)

137
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:15,876
(BELL DINGS)

138
00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:18,629
Another Laugh Canister filled. (SIGHS)

139
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:20,797
Have a seat. How you doing, champ?

140
00:06:20,881 --> 00:06:22,257
Rinse! Swish!

141
00:06:22,341 --> 00:06:24,760
I tell ya, you're a comedy tank.
Comedy tank!

142
00:06:24,843 --> 00:06:27,596
When it comes to humor,
you throw no punch lines, Mr. Wazowski.

143
00:06:27,679 --> 00:06:29,515
Spit! You throw no punch lines!

144
00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:32,392
Now let's get you out there
for the next round.

145
00:06:32,476 --> 00:06:34,061
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

146
00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:35,979
You've been at this 18 hours straight.

147
00:06:36,063 --> 00:06:38,148
-You need to take a break.
-Ah! "A break"?

148
00:06:38,232 --> 00:06:40,692
Sulley, I am personally
powering Monstropolis.

149
00:06:40,776 --> 00:06:43,612
First place, second place... fourth place?

150
00:06:43,695 --> 00:06:47,032
Uh, that Lanky and his spinning bowtie.

151
00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:49,868
We'll see who gets the last laugh, Lanky.

152
00:06:49,952 --> 00:06:53,372
Mike, you need to relax.
Let the others handle it for a while.

153
00:06:53,455 --> 00:06:55,541
I'm fine. I gotta keep the kids laughing.

154
00:06:55,624 --> 00:06:56,959
I got a gift, Sulley.

155
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:58,836
You do not hide a gift like mine

156
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:02,923
from my tiny, adoring friends.

157
00:07:03,006 --> 00:07:04,216
(SNORING)

158
00:07:04,299 --> 00:07:06,218
If you're gonna keep the kids laughing,

159
00:07:06,301 --> 00:07:08,178
we'd better get you some coffee.

160
00:07:12,516 --> 00:07:13,642
Okay.

161
00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:16,812
Creamer, sugar.

162
00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:19,606
Sugars. Creamers, stir sticks.
No stir sticks.

163
00:07:19,690 --> 00:07:20,941
Where is it?

164
00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:23,485
(GRUNTS)

165
00:07:29,575 --> 00:07:30,659
(GROANS)

166
00:07:30,742 --> 00:07:32,619
There you go. That'll help.

167
00:07:33,161 --> 00:07:34,204
(GULPS)

168
00:07:34,288 --> 00:07:37,499
Yeah, that's horrible.
(SMACKS LIPS AND GROANS)

169
00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:39,418
Tastes like someone's finger.

170
00:07:39,501 --> 00:07:41,420
Uh. That's weird.

171
00:07:41,503 --> 00:07:42,754
Well, thanks, Sulley.

172
00:07:42,838 --> 00:07:44,006
-ROZE: Wazowski!
-(GASPS)

173
00:07:44,089 --> 00:07:48,594
Better not fall asleep
in your comedy class.

174
00:07:48,677 --> 00:07:51,305
That's right.
I'm teaching comedy class at lunch.

175
00:07:51,388 --> 00:07:53,599
Mike, you can't keep going like this.

176
00:07:53,682 --> 00:07:55,434
Actually, he can, Mr. Sullivan,

177
00:07:55,517 --> 00:07:59,021
with a little something called
36 1/2 Hour Energy drink.

178
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:01,398
Yeah. Me and Needleman drink two of those

179
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:03,775
when we run out of our
73 Hour Energy drink.

180
00:08:03,859 --> 00:08:07,196
It's twice as good
as the 18 1/4 Hour Energy drink.

181
00:08:07,279 --> 00:08:08,280
Yeah? I don't know.

182
00:08:08,363 --> 00:08:11,783
Thirty-six-and-a-half hours sounds like
a lot of energy for such a little...

183
00:08:11,867 --> 00:08:12,868
Hmm. (SMACKS LIPS)

184
00:08:17,539 --> 00:08:18,707
Wow.

185
00:08:18,790 --> 00:08:21,335
And now,
the moment you've been waiting for.

186
00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:24,463
-Haven't been waiting.
-Tylor, this is your desk.

187
00:08:24,546 --> 00:08:26,757
-Lucky.
-Isn't this your break table?

188
00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:28,675
-This table...
-Which is everybody's table.

189
00:08:28,759 --> 00:08:30,636
...will double as your very own desk.

190
00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:33,555
And what desk wouldn't be complete

191
00:08:33,639 --> 00:08:35,682
-without your very own nameplate?
-Yes!

192
00:08:35,766 --> 00:08:37,643
-You get...
-Complimentary Drooler Cooler.

193
00:08:37,768 --> 00:08:38,977
Real drool in every drop.

194
00:08:39,061 --> 00:08:41,480
-"I gift MIFT" coffee mug.
-VAL: That used to be mine.

195
00:08:41,563 --> 00:08:43,982
-A picture of yourself.
-And me.

196
00:08:44,066 --> 00:08:45,984
Is this from a security camera?

197
00:08:46,068 --> 00:08:48,237
-And last but not least...
-VAL: Not least.

198
00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:51,365
...your ceremonial
sacred wrench engraved...

199
00:08:51,448 --> 00:08:53,784
-I engraved it.
-...with the name of our newest member.

200
00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:56,036
-Welcome, Tylor!
-One of us!

201
00:08:56,119 --> 00:08:59,248
I mean, you really shouldn't have
gone to all this trouble.

202
00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:01,750
I am not going to be here that long.

203
00:09:01,834 --> 00:09:04,378
Oh. I like the sound of that.

204
00:09:04,461 --> 00:09:06,713
-Do you like it, Roto?
-(GROWLS)

205
00:09:06,797 --> 00:09:09,675
Roto doesn't trust it.
Therefore, I don't trust it.

206
00:09:09,758 --> 00:09:12,302
-(GROWLS)
-Oh. Oh. Uh...

207
00:09:12,386 --> 00:09:14,429
Is he even allowed to have pets at work?

208
00:09:14,513 --> 00:09:16,974
"Pet"? He's my emotional support animal.

209
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,684
Aren't you, Roto? (KISSES)

210
00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:20,018
It's a medical condition.

211
00:09:20,102 --> 00:09:23,397
Now, you wait here, Tylor,
'cause we have one more surprise.

212
00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:26,692
-You're gonna love it.
-CUTTER: L-U-C-K-Y.

213
00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:28,610
Uh-huh. Meanwhile,
I'll get ol' young Tylor here

214
00:09:28,694 --> 00:09:30,487
set up with some canister refurbishments.

215
00:09:31,947 --> 00:09:34,658
All right, pretty boy.
Here's a type A-188 series B canister.

216
00:09:34,741 --> 00:09:38,245
The screen valve's about to experience
a catastrophic failure in 23 seconds.

217
00:09:38,328 --> 00:09:40,539
-Here's the manual. Go.
-(STUTTERS) Okay...

218
00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:41,832
Fifteen seconds!

219
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:44,626
"Flow valve, F-4." No, no. Forget it.

220
00:09:44,710 --> 00:09:46,753
-Five seconds!
-There's gotta... No. No, no, no.

221
00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:52,926
(EXCLAIMS)

222
00:09:55,429 --> 00:09:56,555
Oh!

223
00:09:56,638 --> 00:09:58,015
Get down! Get down!

224
00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:03,604
Well, time for lunch.

225
00:10:05,439 --> 00:10:06,481
(DUNCAN WHISTLES)

226
00:10:07,316 --> 00:10:09,318
(CLICKS TONGUE)
Fritz sure will be disappointed.

227
00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:12,905
You really messed that up.
(CHUCKLES)

228
00:10:12,988 --> 00:10:14,656
I'll tell you what's messed up.

229
00:10:14,740 --> 00:10:16,617
You trying to kill me, okay?

230
00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:18,869
You guys are the ones who are messed up.

231
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,455
I'm going to comedy class. Crazy MIFTers.

232
00:10:21,538 --> 00:10:24,333
MIFTonians. MIFTies.

233
00:10:24,416 --> 00:10:27,920
MIFTamacallits. MIFTouts.

234
00:10:28,003 --> 00:10:29,630
Uh... Push?

235
00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:30,714
(PANTING)

236
00:10:31,507 --> 00:10:32,925
MIFTfits.

237
00:10:34,051 --> 00:10:38,472
-Piñata time, piñata time, olé!
-Piñata time, piñata time, olé!

238
00:10:39,056 --> 00:10:40,724
-Hey.
-What happened?

239
00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:42,267
Duncan, what did you do?

240
00:10:42,351 --> 00:10:43,519
(SPUTTERS)

241
00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:46,522
Whoa. Don't listen to him, okay?

242
00:10:46,605 --> 00:10:49,149
He's exaggerating.
I didn't try to kill him.

243
00:10:49,233 --> 00:10:51,193
The rookie couldn't change a simple valve.

244
00:10:51,276 --> 00:10:52,277
Where did he go?

245
00:10:52,361 --> 00:10:54,363
He said something about a comedy class.

246
00:10:54,446 --> 00:10:56,198
-I don't keep his schedule.
-Comedy class?

247
00:10:56,281 --> 00:10:58,283
He didn't say anything
about a comedy class.

248
00:10:58,367 --> 00:10:59,910
I don't understand.

249
00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:02,079
I tried so hard
to make him feel welcome here.

250
00:11:02,162 --> 00:11:05,040
I gave him a desk, a nameplate, and look,

251
00:11:05,123 --> 00:11:08,126
he never even drank his Drooler Cooler.

252
00:11:08,210 --> 00:11:10,045
Sad sigh.

253
00:11:10,128 --> 00:11:12,631
Welcome to Mike's
very first class on comedy.

254
00:11:12,714 --> 00:11:13,799
I'm Mike. Hello.

255
00:11:13,882 --> 00:11:16,301
It's my class, on comedy.
Before we get started,

256
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:18,679
I'd like to say a few words
about my comedy journey.

257
00:11:18,762 --> 00:11:20,264
I was born in a tiny hamlet...

258
00:11:20,347 --> 00:11:22,599
I have got to get onto that Laugh Floor.

259
00:11:22,683 --> 00:11:24,643
Yeah, can't happen soon enough.

260
00:11:24,726 --> 00:11:27,521
Tell me about it.
They stuck me down with the MIFT lunatics.

261
00:11:27,604 --> 00:11:29,022
Huh. Brutal.

262
00:11:29,106 --> 00:11:31,608
Yeah. "Monsters, Inc. Facilities Team."
(SCOFFS)

263
00:11:31,692 --> 00:11:33,610
I've yet to see them fix anything.

264
00:11:33,694 --> 00:11:35,654
I'm surprised
this place is still standing.

265
00:11:35,737 --> 00:11:37,781
Sooner I get away from those guys,
the better.

266
00:11:37,865 --> 00:11:39,992
Tylor. Tylor.

267
00:11:40,075 --> 00:11:41,493
-Tylor! Hey!
-No. Stop it!

268
00:11:41,577 --> 00:11:42,661
Ty-Ty! Hi!

269
00:11:42,744 --> 00:11:43,829
What are you doing here?

270
00:11:43,912 --> 00:11:46,248
-You forgot your Drooler Cooler.
-And us.

271
00:11:46,331 --> 00:11:48,709
So, I insisted we all bring it to you.

272
00:11:48,792 --> 00:11:50,127
Aren't we lucky?

273
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:52,379
Ah! More students. Hello! Take a seat.

274
00:11:52,462 --> 00:11:56,216
Hey, thanks!
So, when you say "take a seat,"

275
00:11:56,300 --> 00:11:58,552
does that mean I have to return it?

276
00:11:58,635 --> 00:12:00,262
Ha! You see what I did there?

277
00:12:00,345 --> 00:12:01,930
My first joke. Wow.

278
00:12:02,014 --> 00:12:04,558
Mr. W, the class really works.

279
00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:05,893
Don't quit your day job.

280
00:12:05,976 --> 00:12:08,562
We'll be chatting about my
Ten Rules of Comedy. Ready?

281
00:12:08,645 --> 00:12:11,106
"Punch line does not mean
actually punching somebody."

282
00:12:11,190 --> 00:12:13,358
I joined the improv group at MU,
Monsters of Comedy.

283
00:12:13,442 --> 00:12:14,526
-You were in it?
-Nope.

284
00:12:14,610 --> 00:12:16,153
They did this thing, "Yes, and..."

285
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:17,738
where you have to say, "Yes, and..."

286
00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:20,157
They asked for 50 bucks
and I said, "Yes, and..."

287
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:23,202
"Hundred bucks?" "Yes, and..."
"Two hundred bucks?" "Yes, and..."

288
00:12:23,285 --> 00:12:25,412
-It was a very expensive class.
-MIKE: That's it for me.

289
00:12:25,495 --> 00:12:26,997
Got through quicker than I thought.

290
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,707
Here's Ms. Flint to share comedy data.

291
00:12:28,790 --> 00:12:29,917
Back to the Laugh Floor.

292
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,544
"Comedy theory. It's no laughing matter."

293
00:12:37,174 --> 00:12:38,759
Another power outage?

294
00:12:38,842 --> 00:12:41,845
Don't you worry, schmoopsie-poo.
Your power ball of comedy is back.

295
00:12:41,929 --> 00:12:43,180
(BREATHING RAPIDLY)

296
00:12:44,765 --> 00:12:45,933
Perfect timing, Fungus.

297
00:12:46,016 --> 00:12:48,143
With these power outages,
I don't think it's safe.

298
00:12:48,227 --> 00:12:49,228
Out of my way.

299
00:12:49,311 --> 00:12:51,772
I got 35 and three-quarter hours
left on my energy drink.

300
00:12:51,855 --> 00:12:53,941
-I don't think you should!
-I'm going in!

301
00:12:55,442 --> 00:12:57,528
(EXCLAIMS) Reset, reset, reset!

302
00:12:58,403 --> 00:12:59,530
Oh, that's not working.

303
00:12:59,613 --> 00:13:00,781
(MACHINE BEEPING)

304
00:13:00,864 --> 00:13:03,951
(SHUDDERS) We've got a 13-20. A 13-20!

305
00:13:04,034 --> 00:13:06,119
-Googly bear's trapped!
-(SNAKES SCREAMS)

306
00:13:06,203 --> 00:13:08,038
MISS FLINT: Comedy is not
just about laughter.

307
00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:10,249
It's also about rules,
categories, and acronyms.

308
00:13:10,332 --> 00:13:11,875
Any questions?

309
00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:13,168
(SPUTTERS)

310
00:13:13,252 --> 00:13:15,212
(LAUGHS) Oh.

311
00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:17,589
-Interesting insight.
-(ALARM BLARING)

312
00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:20,217
CELIA: (OVER PA)
Attention, please. We have a 13-20.

313
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,553
I need MIFT to report
to Laugh Floor F-station-five.

314
00:13:22,636 --> 00:13:23,887
13-20. A monster is trapped.

315
00:13:23,971 --> 00:13:25,639
-Duncan, grab Cutter.
-Got it.

316
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:26,890
-Val, gear up!
-Gearing up.

317
00:13:26,974 --> 00:13:30,060
-Tylor, you're with us. Come on!
-Me? Yeah, there's nothing...

318
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:33,814
Tylor, you are with us. Come on!

319
00:13:34,815 --> 00:13:36,441
MISS FLINT: Actually, Banana Bread, is it?

320
00:13:36,525 --> 00:13:37,526
(SPUTTERS)

321
00:13:37,609 --> 00:13:39,695
-Could you stay behind for a moment?
-(ALARM BLARING)

322
00:13:40,362 --> 00:13:41,655
(TYLOR EXCLAIMING)

323
00:13:47,619 --> 00:13:49,204
-Who's trapped?
-It's Mike!

324
00:13:52,249 --> 00:13:53,292
Come on, let's go.

325
00:13:54,168 --> 00:13:56,295
We need to get power
to this control panel.

326
00:13:56,378 --> 00:13:59,173
-Val, generator.
-Look out! Coming through!

327
00:13:59,256 --> 00:14:00,674
-We need cable, stat.
-Yes, sir.

328
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:02,968
-FRITZ: Cutter, bypass control.
-You got it.

329
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:07,764
VAL: We got power!

330
00:14:08,390 --> 00:14:09,391
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

331
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:11,518
(BEEPS)

332
00:14:12,269 --> 00:14:13,645
DUNCAN: Back in business!

333
00:14:13,729 --> 00:14:16,815
(SIGHS) I spent my whole life
trying to get my foot in the door.

334
00:14:16,899 --> 00:14:19,151
Then I couldn't even get it...
(SCREAMS)

335
00:14:19,234 --> 00:14:20,235
Mike!

336
00:14:20,319 --> 00:14:23,030
The control panel's fried.
Cutter, open the pit.

337
00:14:23,113 --> 00:14:25,490
CUTTER: Way ahead of you!
Open in three, two, one.

338
00:14:26,158 --> 00:14:28,076
-Duncan. Eyes down below.
-Yep!

339
00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:29,328
(GRUNTING)

340
00:14:30,996 --> 00:14:32,956
Backup system's shorted out.

341
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,750
(YELPING)

342
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,628
Don't worry, googly bear,
we're getting you down.

343
00:14:37,711 --> 00:14:39,588
Switch to manual override.

344
00:14:40,756 --> 00:14:42,549
-MIKE: Schmoopsie-poo!
-(DUNCAN GRUNTS)

345
00:14:45,636 --> 00:14:46,887
(EXCLAIMS)

346
00:14:46,970 --> 00:14:48,305
(SCREAMS)

347
00:14:57,898 --> 00:15:00,234
-CELIA: Oh. Mike...
-SULLEY: Googly bear...

348
00:15:00,776 --> 00:15:03,487
Duncan, reverse the conveyor track.

349
00:15:03,570 --> 00:15:04,571
Reverse! Yes, sir.

350
00:15:07,199 --> 00:15:08,742
(GRUNTING)

351
00:15:08,825 --> 00:15:10,661
It's rusted in place!

352
00:15:10,744 --> 00:15:12,496
I can't turn it.

353
00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:15,832
Duncan's arms are way too scrawny
and far too weak.

354
00:15:15,916 --> 00:15:17,084
-DUNCAN: I heard that.
-Val?

355
00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:19,628
Sorry, these puppies aren't long enough.

356
00:15:20,671 --> 00:15:22,089
Oh, dear.

357
00:15:23,173 --> 00:15:25,008
Of course. Tylor.

358
00:15:25,801 --> 00:15:26,969
Me? No, no, no.

359
00:15:27,052 --> 00:15:30,264
Get in there, champ, and wrench that nut.

360
00:15:31,098 --> 00:15:34,351
Come on, big guy. Wrench the nut.

361
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:36,728
Wrench the nut!

362
00:15:36,812 --> 00:15:38,313
Wrench the nut.

363
00:15:38,397 --> 00:15:40,023
-Wrench the nut.
-Wrench the nut.

364
00:15:40,107 --> 00:15:41,358
Wrench the nut.

365
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:42,693
Wrench the nut.

366
00:15:42,776 --> 00:15:44,570
Wrench the nut.

367
00:15:45,279 --> 00:15:46,488
Wrench the nut.

368
00:15:46,572 --> 00:15:48,198
(CHANTING CONTINUES)

369
00:15:51,785 --> 00:15:52,828
(SIGHS)

370
00:15:59,168 --> 00:16:00,210
(GROANS)

371
00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:06,258
(GRUNTING)

372
00:16:10,971 --> 00:16:12,097
(TYLOR EXHALES)

373
00:16:13,223 --> 00:16:14,224
MIKE: Whoo-hoo!

374
00:16:16,268 --> 00:16:18,478
Ready. Now!

375
00:16:24,109 --> 00:16:25,652
(BREATHING HEAVILY)

376
00:16:27,404 --> 00:16:29,364
Another Laugh Canister...

377
00:16:30,032 --> 00:16:31,033
(MACHINE DINGS)

378
00:16:31,617 --> 00:16:32,659
...filled.

379
00:16:32,743 --> 00:16:33,911
(SNORING)

380
00:16:35,204 --> 00:16:36,455
Only took him two hours

381
00:16:36,538 --> 00:16:39,416
to burn through all
thirty-six-and-a-half hours of energy.

382
00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:41,627
Oh, let's just let him sleep.

383
00:16:42,794 --> 00:16:45,422
Great job, MIFT. And thank you, Tylor.

384
00:16:45,506 --> 00:16:47,591
No, no. It was a team effort, really.
Really.

385
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:50,010
Well, they couldn't have
done it without you.

386
00:16:50,093 --> 00:16:52,554
You did it!
You wrenched the heck out of that nut.

387
00:16:52,638 --> 00:16:55,098
You finished your first job as a MIFTer.

388
00:16:55,182 --> 00:16:57,601
-Yeah!
-This calls for a celebration!

389
00:16:58,519 --> 00:17:00,938
-First round of Drooler Coolers on me!
-VAL: Oh, yeah.

390
00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:02,856
-(EXCLAIMS)
-CUTTER: There you go.

391
00:17:02,940 --> 00:17:06,652
You know what, guys?
The second round's on... Banana Bread?

392
00:17:06,735 --> 00:17:07,861
(SPUTTERS)

393
00:17:07,945 --> 00:17:10,989
Hey, Double B.
Come celebrate with your buddily bud-buds.

394
00:17:11,073 --> 00:17:12,324
There won't be time for that.

395
00:17:12,407 --> 00:17:14,660
Winchester here
is needed on the Laugh Floor.

396
00:17:14,743 --> 00:17:16,662
Whoa. Your name is Winchester?

397
00:17:16,745 --> 00:17:18,330
Wait. What? Laugh Floor?

398
00:17:18,413 --> 00:17:21,792
I was intrigued by Winchester's
nuanced insight on comic theory.

399
00:17:21,875 --> 00:17:23,877
So, on that hunch, I ran some tests

400
00:17:23,961 --> 00:17:26,588
and, well, turns out, he's hilarious.

401
00:17:26,672 --> 00:17:28,257
-(SPUTTERS)
-(LAUGHS)

402
00:17:28,882 --> 00:17:31,343
Stop, stop! (LAUGHS)

403
00:17:31,426 --> 00:17:33,387
Seriously, save it for the kids.

404
00:17:33,470 --> 00:17:35,722
Oh. My stomach hurts from laughing.

405
00:17:36,890 --> 00:17:38,183
Way to go, Banana Bread.

406
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,936
Yep. There goes my free baked goods.

407
00:17:41,019 --> 00:17:44,356
You think you know a guy,
other than, of course, his real name.

408
00:17:44,439 --> 00:17:45,983
But I guess for some people...

409
00:17:46,066 --> 00:17:47,317
(SNIFFLES)

410
00:17:47,401 --> 00:17:49,027
MIFT just isn't special enough.

411
00:18:02,165 --> 00:18:04,293
But now, we've got Tylor.

412
00:18:04,376 --> 00:18:10,299
Swift with the wrench
I welcome you to your new desk

413
00:18:10,382 --> 00:18:12,593
Temporary new desk.
Not planning on staying.

414
00:18:12,676 --> 00:18:14,344
Good ol' Double T.

415
00:18:14,970 --> 00:18:16,388
I still have the piñata!

416
00:18:16,471 --> 00:18:17,514
Piñata time!

417
00:18:17,598 --> 00:18:19,224
Ooh. I'll take that action.

418
00:18:19,308 --> 00:18:21,226
I'd like to bash the head first, if I may.

419
00:18:21,310 --> 00:18:23,187
FRITZ: Piñata time!

420
00:18:23,270 --> 00:18:24,938
VAL: Piñata time!

421
00:18:25,522 --> 00:18:27,191
Yep. Weird.

422
00:18:27,274 --> 00:18:29,318
Piñata time!

423
00:18:29,401 --> 00:18:30,986
FRITZ: Piñata time!

424
00:18:37,659 --> 00:18:39,661
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

425
00:18:54,009 --> 00:18:57,137
While becoming a jokester
makes kids laugh,

426
00:18:57,221 --> 00:18:58,514
you'll have to be careful.

427
00:18:58,597 --> 00:18:59,765
(CLEARS THROAT)

428
00:18:59,848 --> 00:19:01,892
Otis, if you will.

429
00:19:01,975 --> 00:19:02,976
(PLAYS PIANO)

430
00:19:03,060 --> 00:19:05,437
Comedy can be dangerous, my friends
I'll tell you why

431
00:19:06,146 --> 00:19:08,774
When kids laugh and giggle
They could split a gut

432
00:19:08,857 --> 00:19:11,610
With a chortle, they could crack up
Beware, there is the chance

433
00:19:11,693 --> 00:19:14,655
You could make a kid laugh so hard
They'd pee their pants

434
00:19:14,738 --> 00:19:17,407
Fall out of bed, hit their head
While rolling on the floor

435
00:19:17,491 --> 00:19:20,410
Their bodies shake, sides will ache
They'll laugh until they're sore

436
00:19:20,494 --> 00:19:23,121
There's a funny bone, a danger zone
Someplace no one knows

437
00:19:23,205 --> 00:19:26,124
If you hit that zone, hold the phone
Milk shoots out their nose

438
00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:27,501
(ALL CHUCKLING)

439
00:19:28,919 --> 00:19:31,713
Kids are fragile
Careful not to scoff

440
00:19:31,797 --> 00:19:34,967
Your joke can make
Their heads and butts fall off

441
00:19:35,050 --> 00:19:37,594
Jokes and gags hit 'em hard
With punch lines, so I've read

442
00:19:37,678 --> 00:19:40,138
You could leave a kid in stitches
Or even knock 'em dead

443
00:19:40,222 --> 00:19:41,849
-Knock-knock.
-Who's there?

444
00:19:41,932 --> 00:19:43,350
-Police.
-Police, who?

445
00:19:43,433 --> 00:19:45,352
Police end this song.

446
00:19:45,435 --> 00:19:46,937
(PIANO PLAYS)

447
00:19:47,354 --> 00:19:49,356
(INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

448
00:22:38,817 --> 00:22:40,777
VAL: Whoo-hoo!
You watched all the credits.

449
00:22:40,861 --> 00:22:42,738
That makes you a true MIFTer!

450
00:22:43,906 --> 00:22:45,199
FRITZ: MIFTer!