1
00:00:04,526 --> 00:00:06,049
"Who is Eckhart Tolle?"
2
00:00:06,223 --> 00:00:08,138
"Who is Eckhart Tolle?!"
3
00:00:08,312 --> 00:00:12,577
Who is Eckhart Tolle?
4
00:00:12,751 --> 00:00:15,798
Only one of the most famous
spiritual teachers of our time,
5
00:00:15,972 --> 00:00:18,105
but most importantly,
he's Oprah's bestie.
6
00:00:18,279 --> 00:00:21,630
I thought Gayle was
Oprah's bestie.
7
00:00:21,804 --> 00:00:24,285
At least, according to
the little TV on the gas pump.
8
00:00:24,459 --> 00:00:25,590
Short pants,
short pants.
9
00:00:25,764 --> 00:00:28,550
"What are
knickerbockers?!"
10
00:00:28,724 --> 00:00:32,293
Don't tell me you're still
thinking of going on "Jeopardy!"
11
00:00:32,467 --> 00:00:34,643
It's not the same without
Alex Trebek, rest in peace.
12
00:00:34,817 --> 00:00:37,428
No, of course not, but Alex
would want it to go on,
13
00:00:37,602 --> 00:00:38,821
and he would
want me to go on.
14
00:00:38,995 --> 00:00:40,301
He told me that...
15
00:00:40,475 --> 00:00:42,825
when I was on
the hallucinogenic tea.
16
00:00:42,999 --> 00:00:47,134
Oh, well, if the drugs said so,
you gotta do it.
17
00:00:47,308 --> 00:00:49,832
Stop trying to neg me,
Dan.
18
00:00:50,006 --> 00:00:51,181
"What is
Little Big Horn?"
19
00:00:51,355 --> 00:00:54,271
I mean, "Who is Custer?"
Dammit, Jackie!
20
00:00:54,445 --> 00:00:57,970
You're going to "the show."
Get it together.
21
00:00:58,145 --> 00:01:01,974
Grandpa, can we go to Laser Maxx
Family Fun Center this weekend?
22
00:01:02,149 --> 00:01:03,498
They're social distancing.
23
00:01:03,672 --> 00:01:05,456
Oh, money's a little tight
right now, honey.
24
00:01:05,630 --> 00:01:08,285
Hey, you want to play laser tag,
let's go out in the yard
25
00:01:08,459 --> 00:01:10,853
and I'll chase you around
with a flashlight.
26
00:01:11,027 --> 00:01:12,463
[ Rhythmic knock on door ]
27
00:01:14,813 --> 00:01:16,163
Oh!
28
00:01:18,730 --> 00:01:19,992
Hey, man.
What's up?
29
00:01:20,167 --> 00:01:21,777
Oh.
Nothing.
30
00:01:21,951 --> 00:01:25,998
Just thought I'd drop by and ask
you to look out your window.
31
00:01:26,173 --> 00:01:27,783
It's a boat.
32
00:01:27,957 --> 00:01:29,785
Oh, it is a boat.
33
00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:33,745
Your commitment to these
practical jokes is impressive.
34
00:01:33,919 --> 00:01:36,052
Uh, it's mine.
I just bought it.
35
00:01:36,226 --> 00:01:38,141
It took me a minute
to convince Anne-Marie,
36
00:01:38,315 --> 00:01:40,491
but once I got the grandkids
to whine
37
00:01:40,665 --> 00:01:44,365
at that pitch that makes her
crazy, she gave in.
38
00:01:44,539 --> 00:01:46,062
Good for you.
Yeah.
39
00:01:46,236 --> 00:01:48,064
You want some coffee?
No, I don't want some coffee.
40
00:01:48,238 --> 00:01:49,413
I-I want you to
come look at my boat.
41
00:01:49,587 --> 00:01:51,850
I saw it.
You want some coffee or not?
42
00:01:52,024 --> 00:01:53,635
Iwant to go see
your boat!
43
00:01:53,809 --> 00:01:55,985
See, that's how you act
when someone gets a boat.
44
00:01:56,159 --> 00:01:57,769
[ Chuckles ]
45
00:01:57,943 --> 00:02:00,511
Come on.
Get excited, man.
46
00:02:00,685 --> 00:02:03,210
We're gonna have a blast
this summer on Lake Michigan.
47
00:02:03,384 --> 00:02:04,559
You know, I'm hoping
you and Louise
48
00:02:04,733 --> 00:02:06,300
will be able to join us
sometime, man.
49
00:02:06,474 --> 00:02:08,476
We can cruise around,
drink beer.
50
00:02:08,650 --> 00:02:10,608
[ Chuckles ]
Sure. Sounds great.
51
00:02:12,567 --> 00:02:14,656
Kind of ironic,
isn't it?
52
00:02:14,830 --> 00:02:16,266
What do you mean?
53
00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:18,573
No, I mean,
it just goes to show you.
54
00:02:18,747 --> 00:02:21,271
[ Scoffs ]
Just goes to show you what?
55
00:02:21,445 --> 00:02:24,405
Well, it's funny how
I'm the one that gave you a job,
56
00:02:24,579 --> 00:02:26,102
made you a partner
in my business,
57
00:02:26,276 --> 00:02:29,845
and now you have a boat
and I don't.
58
00:02:30,019 --> 00:02:30,846
[ Chuckles ]
59
00:02:31,020 --> 00:02:32,195
What are you, uh...
60
00:02:32,369 --> 00:02:33,936
You saying
I shouldn't have a boat?
61
00:02:34,110 --> 00:02:36,678
No, no, no. I'm not saying
you shouldn't have a boat.
62
00:02:38,201 --> 00:02:42,205
I'm just saying I probably
should have had a boat first.
63
00:02:42,379 --> 00:02:46,078
You know what, Dan,
you're right.
64
00:02:46,253 --> 00:02:49,169
How dare I have a boat
before you?
65
00:02:49,343 --> 00:02:50,692
Come on, I didn't mean it
like that.
66
00:02:50,866 --> 00:02:51,867
Oh, yes, you did.
67
00:02:52,041 --> 00:02:53,695
You just didn't know
you did.
68
00:02:53,869 --> 00:02:57,220
You know, I'll try and remember
to stay a step below you, Dan.
69
00:02:57,394 --> 00:02:59,918
What are you getting
so worked up about?
70
00:03:00,092 --> 00:03:02,182
I told you
I like your stupid boat.
71
00:03:02,356 --> 00:03:03,661
Now sit down
and have some coffee.
72
00:03:03,835 --> 00:03:05,185
Oh, don't tell me
what to do.
73
00:03:05,359 --> 00:03:07,230
I don't even know
why I came over here.
74
00:03:09,972 --> 00:03:11,930
[ Door opens, closes ]
75
00:03:12,104 --> 00:03:45,225
♪
76
00:03:45,399 --> 00:03:48,228
--Captions by VITAC--
77
00:03:48,402 --> 00:03:49,794
♪
78
00:03:49,968 --> 00:03:51,318
Wow.
79
00:03:51,492 --> 00:03:53,450
I can't believe
I have my own office.
80
00:03:53,624 --> 00:03:54,973
Well, if it's
too much for you,
81
00:03:55,147 --> 00:03:56,758
we can always get you
a milk crate and a stool.
82
00:03:56,932 --> 00:03:58,499
No, no. No.
83
00:03:58,673 --> 00:04:01,023
I-It's weird,
but it's kinda cool.
84
00:04:01,197 --> 00:04:04,940
In the meantime, I've, uh,
set up some interviews for you
85
00:04:05,114 --> 00:04:07,029
so you can hire
an assistant.
86
00:04:07,203 --> 00:04:08,335
An assistant?
87
00:04:08,509 --> 00:04:09,727
Uh, I'm pretty much
the kind of person
88
00:04:09,901 --> 00:04:11,555
that likes to do everything
by myself.
89
00:04:11,729 --> 00:04:13,470
Just ask my boyfriend
how I am in bed.
90
00:04:13,644 --> 00:04:16,212
I did.
He said you need an assistant.
91
00:04:18,170 --> 00:04:19,302
You were 10 minutes late
today.
92
00:04:19,476 --> 00:04:21,261
I was 15 minutes late
yesterday.
93
00:04:21,435 --> 00:04:24,220
How 'bout an 'atta girl?
94
00:04:26,744 --> 00:04:31,227
So, this is what it's like
living inside Robin's butt.
95
00:04:31,401 --> 00:04:33,229
Where do you
keep the stick?
96
00:04:33,403 --> 00:04:35,231
Okay, did you come here
just to torment me?
97
00:04:35,405 --> 00:04:36,754
Mostly.
98
00:04:36,928 --> 00:04:39,061
But I'm also here on
Union Steward business.
99
00:04:39,235 --> 00:04:41,411
The time clock is
five minutes off,
100
00:04:41,585 --> 00:04:44,458
so we're getting written up
for coming in late.
101
00:04:44,632 --> 00:04:47,199
Maybe you people up here could
put down your caviar spoons
102
00:04:47,374 --> 00:04:49,550
for a minute
and come down and fix it.
103
00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:51,856
Okay, okay.
I'll -- I'll look into it.
104
00:04:52,030 --> 00:04:53,293
Now beat it.
105
00:04:53,467 --> 00:04:54,903
I gotta interview
some assistants.
106
00:04:55,077 --> 00:04:56,339
You know, in an interview,
107
00:04:56,513 --> 00:04:58,428
you have to pretend
to listen to people.
108
00:04:58,602 --> 00:05:02,911
All I have to do is look in
their eyes, nod periodically,
109
00:05:03,085 --> 00:05:06,088
and then, you know,
there's the smiling.
110
00:05:06,262 --> 00:05:08,743
And that's how the Joker
became the Joker.
111
00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:12,834
[ Sighs ]
112
00:05:13,008 --> 00:05:14,226
Hmm.
113
00:05:14,401 --> 00:05:15,793
Yeah.
114
00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:22,104
Couldn't hold me down,
could you, Lanford?
115
00:05:22,278 --> 00:05:24,236
Who's the bitch now?
116
00:05:24,411 --> 00:05:25,629
Excuse me?
117
00:05:25,803 --> 00:05:27,457
Oh.
I'm here for the interview?
118
00:05:27,631 --> 00:05:29,633
Oh, my God. Hi.
I'm so sorry.
119
00:05:29,807 --> 00:05:31,853
I'm Darlene Conner.
First question --
120
00:05:32,027 --> 00:05:34,116
you still want to work for me
after hearing that?
121
00:05:34,290 --> 00:05:35,987
No worries.
My last boss
122
00:05:36,161 --> 00:05:38,773
shot a champagne cork out
his window and killed a bird.
123
00:05:38,947 --> 00:05:40,557
Um...
124
00:05:40,731 --> 00:05:42,429
Okay.
125
00:05:42,603 --> 00:05:44,431
Where should we start?
126
00:05:44,605 --> 00:05:45,780
Can I sit down?
127
00:05:45,954 --> 00:05:48,086
Oh, my God. Yes.
Please sit down.
128
00:05:53,048 --> 00:05:56,268
So...um...
129
00:05:57,879 --> 00:05:59,446
I'm interested in you.
130
00:05:59,620 --> 00:06:00,969
Oh.
131
00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:02,797
Uh, what's that you got
in your hand?
132
00:06:02,971 --> 00:06:04,538
Oh, this is just
a little rabbit's foot
133
00:06:04,712 --> 00:06:06,278
my daughter Ruthie gave me.
134
00:06:06,453 --> 00:06:08,803
If I get this job,
she can get her own computer.
135
00:06:08,977 --> 00:06:10,152
She's been using
the computer
136
00:06:10,326 --> 00:06:12,067
at the halfway house
down the block,
137
00:06:12,241 --> 00:06:13,808
but I'm really not comfortable
with her asking the junkies
138
00:06:13,982 --> 00:06:16,463
how to spell things.
139
00:06:18,029 --> 00:06:19,509
You're hired.
140
00:06:19,683 --> 00:06:21,424
Whoa. Really?
141
00:06:21,598 --> 00:06:23,165
No other questions?
142
00:06:23,339 --> 00:06:25,994
Oh, God, no. I wouldn't put
either one of us through that.
143
00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:28,300
Thank you so much!
Oh, this is gonna be great.
Yeah.
144
00:06:28,475 --> 00:06:31,086
Okay. Oh. What do you
usually wear to work?
145
00:06:31,260 --> 00:06:32,609
Um...I don't know.
146
00:06:32,783 --> 00:06:34,176
Something kind of like
what I'm wearing today.
147
00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:35,307
Why?
148
00:06:35,482 --> 00:06:37,701
Let me just take
a quick photo.
149
00:06:37,875 --> 00:06:39,660
That way, I can be sure
we coordinate.
150
00:06:39,834 --> 00:06:41,966
I want people to know
I belong to you.
151
00:06:42,140 --> 00:06:43,533
Mm!
152
00:06:47,972 --> 00:06:51,236
You always get the last laugh,
don't you, Lanford?
153
00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:54,892
♪
154
00:06:55,066 --> 00:06:56,503
I don't know what
you're trying to flatten,
155
00:06:56,677 --> 00:06:58,766
but it must be pretty curled
to need all those books.
156
00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:01,943
Well, I realized that there are
some "Jeopardy!" categories
157
00:07:02,117 --> 00:07:03,335
I'm not as strong in,
158
00:07:03,510 --> 00:07:05,207
so I'm trying to
memorize history.
159
00:07:05,381 --> 00:07:06,774
Which part?
160
00:07:06,948 --> 00:07:08,384
Human.
161
00:07:08,558 --> 00:07:09,733
[ Knocks on door ]
162
00:07:09,907 --> 00:07:11,256
Hey, can I come in?
163
00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:13,215
I've been tested for
all sorts of things,
164
00:07:13,389 --> 00:07:15,783
but the COVID one is good.
165
00:07:15,957 --> 00:07:16,914
Sure.
166
00:07:17,088 --> 00:07:19,439
Alright.
167
00:07:19,613 --> 00:07:20,570
Jackie.
168
00:07:20,744 --> 00:07:22,659
Dwight.
169
00:07:22,833 --> 00:07:25,009
Chuck asked me
to drop this off.
170
00:07:25,183 --> 00:07:26,054
What's in it?
171
00:07:26,228 --> 00:07:27,795
It's a bill.
172
00:07:27,969 --> 00:07:29,536
Chuck is officially
breaking up the partnership,
173
00:07:29,710 --> 00:07:30,928
and he assumes
you're gonna keep
174
00:07:31,102 --> 00:07:32,408
all the equipment
you guys bought,
175
00:07:32,582 --> 00:07:34,715
so he wants to be
reimbursed for half.
176
00:07:34,889 --> 00:07:36,151
Chuck's breaking up
your partnership?
177
00:07:36,325 --> 00:07:37,631
What happened?
178
00:07:37,805 --> 00:07:39,589
I didn't do cartwheels
over his dumbass boat
179
00:07:39,763 --> 00:07:41,635
and he lost his mind
about it.
180
00:07:41,809 --> 00:07:43,854
He knows I'm struggling
to hang onto my house
181
00:07:44,028 --> 00:07:46,509
and he pulls a boat
into my driveway?
182
00:07:46,683 --> 00:07:47,989
Might as well park it
in my be-hind
183
00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:50,905
and call it
the "S.S. Take That."
184
00:07:51,079 --> 00:07:54,038
You know what would show Chuck
a thing or two
185
00:07:54,212 --> 00:07:56,171
is if you got yourself
a new partner.
186
00:07:56,345 --> 00:07:59,217
An attractive, young one.
187
00:07:59,391 --> 00:08:01,568
I'm done with partners.
188
00:08:01,742 --> 00:08:04,266
Okay.
So we're negotiating.
189
00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:06,094
You're offering me nothing.
190
00:08:06,268 --> 00:08:08,009
I will take
a silent partnership
191
00:08:08,183 --> 00:08:09,358
and I'll work for
minimum wage.
192
00:08:09,532 --> 00:08:10,751
Final offer.
193
00:08:10,925 --> 00:08:12,535
That's less than
I pay you now.
194
00:08:12,709 --> 00:08:14,929
Yes, but I'm a partner.
195
00:08:15,103 --> 00:08:18,280
Sounds way better
on Farmers Only.
196
00:08:18,454 --> 00:08:20,717
You city girls don't know
what you want.
197
00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:24,329
Anything you want me to
pass on to Chuck?
198
00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:25,766
Oh, yeah.
199
00:08:25,940 --> 00:08:27,202
Yeah, you can tell him
I'll get him his money
200
00:08:27,376 --> 00:08:29,857
when I'm damn good
and ready!
201
00:08:32,207 --> 00:08:34,209
Okay.
I'll give him the message.
202
00:08:34,383 --> 00:08:37,647
But I don't think I can
replicate your ferocity.
203
00:08:43,827 --> 00:08:46,830
Lisa, can you print
the latest production reports
204
00:08:47,004 --> 00:08:48,310
and put them on my desk,
please?
205
00:08:48,484 --> 00:08:50,312
Sure. Oh!
Hey, boss?
206
00:08:50,486 --> 00:08:51,966
Do you want me to get Ruthie
on her new computer
207
00:08:52,140 --> 00:08:54,490
so she can say thank you
to her Auntie Darlene?
208
00:08:54,664 --> 00:08:57,145
Aww, that's sweet,
but no.
209
00:08:57,319 --> 00:09:01,105
Uh, and I'm not really
comfortable with Auntie Darlene.
210
00:09:01,279 --> 00:09:02,585
Let's start with Ms. Conner
211
00:09:02,759 --> 00:09:04,805
and see where it goes
after five or six years.
212
00:09:04,979 --> 00:09:07,982
[ Telephone rings ]
213
00:09:08,156 --> 00:09:10,027
Darlene Conner's office.
214
00:09:10,201 --> 00:09:11,159
[ Clicks tongue ]
215
00:09:11,333 --> 00:09:13,770
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
216
00:09:13,944 --> 00:09:15,685
It's Ginette from Sales.
217
00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:25,652
Hey, Ginette.
218
00:09:29,264 --> 00:09:30,526
Uh...I-I'm sorry.
219
00:09:30,700 --> 00:09:32,615
Let me put you on hold
for a second.
220
00:09:32,789 --> 00:09:34,617
Why is Ginette
screaming at me?
221
00:09:34,791 --> 00:09:37,838
She just called me something
I only hear in Tarantino films.
222
00:09:38,012 --> 00:09:39,579
Oh. Right.
223
00:09:39,753 --> 00:09:41,537
You know,
she called earlier
224
00:09:41,711 --> 00:09:43,583
saying there's a lot of orders
coming in
225
00:09:43,757 --> 00:09:45,193
and that you need to
get on your people
226
00:09:45,367 --> 00:09:47,238
to increase their output.
227
00:09:47,412 --> 00:09:48,849
I told her that you said
228
00:09:49,023 --> 00:09:51,025
your people are working
as fast as they can
229
00:09:51,199 --> 00:09:52,635
and to get off your back
230
00:09:52,809 --> 00:09:56,117
or you'll come down there
and kick her ass.
231
00:09:56,291 --> 00:09:58,162
What?
Why would you do that?
232
00:09:58,336 --> 00:10:00,077
Ginette's just trying to
push you around
233
00:10:00,251 --> 00:10:01,862
because
you're a new boss.
234
00:10:02,036 --> 00:10:05,343
You need to shank someone
right away to get respect.
235
00:10:05,517 --> 00:10:07,519
Ginette?
236
00:10:07,694 --> 00:10:11,915
Ginette.
237
00:10:12,089 --> 00:10:14,135
Look, why don't I
come down to your office
238
00:10:14,309 --> 00:10:16,659
and we can hash this out,
okay?
239
00:10:18,356 --> 00:10:20,097
Alright,
we've got a problem.
240
00:10:20,271 --> 00:10:21,838
Are you mad at me?
241
00:10:22,012 --> 00:10:23,710
No.
242
00:10:23,884 --> 00:10:25,625
No, this is your first day,
243
00:10:25,799 --> 00:10:27,365
and I should
have made it clear
244
00:10:27,539 --> 00:10:30,238
that you shouldn't threaten
department heads on my behalf.
245
00:10:30,412 --> 00:10:32,980
Well,
that would've helped.
246
00:10:33,154 --> 00:10:34,764
My bad.
247
00:10:36,461 --> 00:10:38,159
[ Dramatic music plays
on television]
248
00:10:38,333 --> 00:10:39,726
Oh, my God!
"Twilight"!
249
00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:41,292
I want to see this.
250
00:10:41,466 --> 00:10:43,077
Mary, it's way
past your bedtime.
251
00:10:43,251 --> 00:10:44,992
What are you doing up?
252
00:10:45,166 --> 00:10:46,820
It's hard to sleep with all
that's going on in the world.
253
00:10:46,994 --> 00:10:48,604
Shh.
254
00:10:49,518 --> 00:10:50,911
[ Sighs ]
255
00:10:51,085 --> 00:10:52,303
You know what, Josh?
256
00:10:52,477 --> 00:10:54,262
I've seen this movie
so many times.
257
00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:57,439
What I really want to watch
right now is C-SPAN.
Mm.
258
00:10:58,962 --> 00:11:03,575
Legislator: Next order of
business, item number 1742.
259
00:11:05,273 --> 00:11:07,928
Does Josh know that mental
illness runs in our family?
260
00:11:08,102 --> 00:11:10,104
It's not mental illness.
261
00:11:10,278 --> 00:11:14,108
It's, uh -- It's uh, drug abuse,
alcoholism, and poor diet.
262
00:11:19,243 --> 00:11:20,680
You're rich,
right, Josh?
263
00:11:20,854 --> 00:11:22,856
Are you going to give Harris
some of that money?
264
00:11:23,030 --> 00:11:24,814
Let's go.
265
00:11:27,556 --> 00:11:29,210
Man on television:
[ Growls]
266
00:11:29,384 --> 00:11:32,082
[ Suspenseful music plays
on television]
267
00:11:32,256 --> 00:11:33,518
"Twilight"?
268
00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:35,303
That's a tricky one
for a girl your age.
269
00:11:35,477 --> 00:11:36,826
They're in love, but he wants
to suck her blood out
270
00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:38,262
and kill her.
271
00:11:38,436 --> 00:11:40,700
Remember, you deserve
better than that.
272
00:11:43,790 --> 00:11:45,792
Have you talked
to Chuck yet?
273
00:11:45,966 --> 00:11:47,576
No point.
274
00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:50,100
I'm writing up a custody
agreement about our equipment.
275
00:11:50,274 --> 00:11:52,494
I figure we could do
every other week.
276
00:11:52,668 --> 00:11:53,930
The important thing is that
277
00:11:54,104 --> 00:11:56,846
the tools don't think
it's their fault.
278
00:11:57,020 --> 00:11:59,501
You guys have known each other
for over 40 years.
279
00:11:59,675 --> 00:12:03,287
You're really gonna throw this
relationship away over a boat?
280
00:12:03,461 --> 00:12:04,680
I'll make new friends.
281
00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:08,031
No, you won't.
You're very unpleasant.
282
00:12:08,205 --> 00:12:09,816
Okay, maybe I was
a little jealous,
283
00:12:09,990 --> 00:12:11,339
but he's the one that
blew the whole thing up.
284
00:12:11,513 --> 00:12:14,908
Come on, Dan.
He's your best friend.
285
00:12:15,082 --> 00:12:16,953
If something good
happened to you --
286
00:12:17,127 --> 00:12:19,434
not that it's ever going to --
who would you call?
287
00:12:20,565 --> 00:12:22,611
When Roseanne went into labor
with Becky,
288
00:12:22,785 --> 00:12:24,874
who was the first person
at the hospital?
289
00:12:25,048 --> 00:12:26,223
Chuck.
290
00:12:26,397 --> 00:12:27,616
But he only beat me there
291
00:12:27,790 --> 00:12:29,270
because the place
he was drinking
292
00:12:29,444 --> 00:12:31,359
was closer to the hospital
than the place I was drinking.
293
00:12:31,533 --> 00:12:36,190
And...who'd you call first
when Roseanne died?
294
00:12:38,235 --> 00:12:40,934
[ Sighs ]
You should just call him.
295
00:12:41,108 --> 00:12:43,501
[ Cellphone chimes ]
296
00:12:43,675 --> 00:12:45,765
Oh, wait a minute.
297
00:12:45,939 --> 00:12:48,898
Oh, maybe we can get
our own damn boat
298
00:12:49,072 --> 00:12:52,815
because I just made the
"Jeopardy!" audition phase!
299
00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:55,600
Talk to Chuck or not,
I don't care.
300
00:13:02,869 --> 00:13:05,480
So, not only did you not
fix the clock,
301
00:13:05,654 --> 00:13:07,699
but now we can't
make eye contact with you
302
00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,136
in the hallway?!
303
00:13:09,310 --> 00:13:11,573
What?
304
00:13:12,704 --> 00:13:14,054
Oh, my God.
305
00:13:14,228 --> 00:13:16,143
This wasn't me --
this was Lisa.
306
00:13:16,317 --> 00:13:17,666
I mean, I kinda like
the concept,
307
00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:19,755
but it's not appropriate.
308
00:13:19,929 --> 00:13:21,539
This woman
is out of control.
309
00:13:21,713 --> 00:13:24,847
Well, you did ask her one whole
question in the interview.
310
00:13:25,021 --> 00:13:26,806
What more could you do?
311
00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:28,764
Well, I only needed
one question,
312
00:13:28,938 --> 00:13:30,897
but it should have been,
"Are you insane?"
313
00:13:31,071 --> 00:13:32,420
You gotta fire her.
314
00:13:32,594 --> 00:13:34,030
No, no.
315
00:13:34,204 --> 00:13:35,771
That's what our bosses always
have done to us,
316
00:13:35,945 --> 00:13:38,208
and we always complained that
we didn't get a second chance.
317
00:13:38,382 --> 00:13:41,429
When I got fired in Chicago,
it literally killed me.
318
00:13:41,603 --> 00:13:43,431
I came home, I cried to Mom,
319
00:13:43,605 --> 00:13:45,302
and I didn't even know
how to move forward.
320
00:13:45,476 --> 00:13:47,652
I'm not gonna do that
to somebody else.
321
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:50,394
Okay, can I do it?
322
00:13:50,568 --> 00:13:51,743
No.
323
00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:53,571
I've got to step up
and be a boss.
324
00:13:53,745 --> 00:13:56,139
I'll be her mentor
the way Robin mentored me.
325
00:13:56,313 --> 00:13:59,142
But let's be honest, how good of
a job did Robin really do?
326
00:13:59,316 --> 00:14:01,275
I mean, look at you.
You're a mess.
327
00:14:01,449 --> 00:14:02,624
No, I'm not.
328
00:14:02,798 --> 00:14:04,931
I'm forging my own
management style.
329
00:14:05,105 --> 00:14:07,063
It's a mix of
conflict avoidance,
330
00:14:07,237 --> 00:14:09,631
blue-collar guilt,
with a dash of IBS.
331
00:14:09,805 --> 00:14:11,589
[ Smooches ]
Chef's kiss.
332
00:14:11,763 --> 00:14:15,550
♪
333
00:14:15,724 --> 00:14:18,118
Boy, this really is
a nice boat.
334
00:14:18,292 --> 00:14:21,164
I took the ferry to Muskegon
one time.
335
00:14:21,338 --> 00:14:25,516
I didn't experience
the pure joy of boating...
336
00:14:25,690 --> 00:14:29,477
because I was in my truck
eating a cheeseburger.
337
00:14:29,651 --> 00:14:30,957
What do you want,
Dan?
338
00:14:31,131 --> 00:14:32,872
Permission to come aboard?
339
00:14:34,090 --> 00:14:36,397
Suit yourself.
340
00:14:38,573 --> 00:14:40,444
Look...
341
00:14:40,618 --> 00:14:43,186
I'm sorry I didn't
jump up and down about the boat,
342
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:45,493
but you know what kind of
money troubles I got.
343
00:14:45,667 --> 00:14:48,365
I guess it felt like
you were...
344
00:14:48,539 --> 00:14:50,498
shoving the thing
in my face.
345
00:14:50,672 --> 00:14:53,675
Oh. But you know me
better than that, Dan.
346
00:14:53,849 --> 00:14:56,112
I just wanted you to
be happy for me -- that's all.
347
00:14:56,286 --> 00:14:57,984
Part of me was,
348
00:14:58,158 --> 00:15:01,117
but part of me was mad at myself
that I didn't get one, too.
349
00:15:01,291 --> 00:15:04,294
Hey, it's not my fault
that you suck at money.
350
00:15:04,468 --> 00:15:08,037
You couldn't hold onto a dollar
bill if it had a handle.
351
00:15:08,211 --> 00:15:09,604
Look, neither one of us
had a lot.
352
00:15:09,778 --> 00:15:11,998
The difference was that
I put away 20 bucks a week
353
00:15:12,172 --> 00:15:13,869
for 40 years.
354
00:15:15,305 --> 00:15:16,480
Yeah.
355
00:15:16,654 --> 00:15:18,221
But I bet
you never had the joy of
356
00:15:18,395 --> 00:15:20,441
blowing your entire paycheck
at the state fair
357
00:15:20,615 --> 00:15:24,010
on things that aren't supposed
to be fried but are.
358
00:15:24,184 --> 00:15:25,968
I'm a Black man.
359
00:15:26,142 --> 00:15:29,058
I got fried all day
every day at home.
360
00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:31,582
Look, I get why
you were pissed at me,
361
00:15:31,756 --> 00:15:34,977
but I don't know why you had to
bust up the business.
362
00:15:35,151 --> 00:15:38,807
Look, because you were going
on and on about doing me a favor
363
00:15:38,981 --> 00:15:42,419
for bringing me onto your crew
and making me your partner.
364
00:15:42,593 --> 00:15:44,204
You think that stuff happened
365
00:15:44,378 --> 00:15:45,727
because I couldn't do it
on my own?
366
00:15:45,901 --> 00:15:47,250
I didn't say that.
367
00:15:47,424 --> 00:15:49,165
Well, I couldn't.
368
00:15:49,339 --> 00:15:52,429
Because I'm Black
and you're white.
369
00:15:52,603 --> 00:15:54,388
What does that have to do
with anything?
370
00:15:54,562 --> 00:15:55,824
Are you kidding?
371
00:15:55,998 --> 00:15:57,304
Lanford in those days?
372
00:15:57,478 --> 00:15:58,958
A Black man running
a construction company
373
00:15:59,132 --> 00:16:00,960
wasn't gonna happen.
374
00:16:01,134 --> 00:16:03,658
I couldn't get a lumber yard
to give me credit.
375
00:16:03,832 --> 00:16:06,139
I couldn't get a loan
from a bank.
376
00:16:06,313 --> 00:16:07,749
And there were plenty
of white customers
377
00:16:07,923 --> 00:16:10,099
that wouldn't trust me
with their business.
378
00:16:10,273 --> 00:16:12,493
You never talked to me
about this.
379
00:16:12,667 --> 00:16:14,364
Come on, man.
380
00:16:14,538 --> 00:16:16,062
You've been in the world.
381
00:16:16,236 --> 00:16:19,587
Even if I told you,
you don't live it.
382
00:16:19,761 --> 00:16:22,590
You wouldn't understand.
383
00:16:22,764 --> 00:16:25,462
Look -- Look,
don't get me wrong.
384
00:16:25,636 --> 00:16:27,377
I appreciate the job
and the fact that
385
00:16:27,551 --> 00:16:31,642
your giant, pale, puffy face
helped me get my boat.
386
00:16:31,816 --> 00:16:34,428
Well, sometimes behind
a giant, white face
387
00:16:34,602 --> 00:16:37,257
is somebody that wants
the best for you.
388
00:16:37,431 --> 00:16:40,477
I hope you learned a little bit
about race here today.
389
00:16:40,651 --> 00:16:41,739
[ Chuckles ]
390
00:16:41,913 --> 00:16:43,654
Screw you, old man.
391
00:16:43,828 --> 00:16:46,266
[ Chuckles ]
392
00:16:47,832 --> 00:16:50,183
And just so you know,
393
00:16:50,357 --> 00:16:51,445
when I hired you,
394
00:16:51,619 --> 00:16:53,882
I thought
I was hiring a friend.
395
00:16:54,056 --> 00:16:55,840
No,
we weren't damn friends.
396
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:58,278
I did what I had to do
to get by.
397
00:16:58,452 --> 00:17:02,412
And it turned out that you were
a -- you were a good guy.
398
00:17:02,586 --> 00:17:06,460
So, hell yeah, nowwe're damn friends.
399
00:17:06,634 --> 00:17:08,766
You're like
a 14-year-old girl, Dan.
400
00:17:08,940 --> 00:17:12,509
I'll get you
a friendship bracelet.
401
00:17:12,683 --> 00:17:14,946
I want the kind where we each
get half a heart.
402
00:17:15,121 --> 00:17:16,644
[ Laughs ]
403
00:17:16,818 --> 00:17:18,428
Hey, what do you say we tear up
this custody agreement,
404
00:17:18,602 --> 00:17:20,735
get back to work,
huh?
405
00:17:20,909 --> 00:17:22,476
Yeah, well, uh...
406
00:17:22,650 --> 00:17:26,132
I've been thinking about that
lately, Dan.
407
00:17:26,306 --> 00:17:27,959
I'm tired.
408
00:17:28,134 --> 00:17:31,572
I've decided
I'm gonna retire.
409
00:17:31,746 --> 00:17:32,964
What?
410
00:17:33,139 --> 00:17:34,749
I-I-I don't want
to work anymore.
411
00:17:34,923 --> 00:17:36,577
I want to enjoy my life.
412
00:17:36,751 --> 00:17:38,187
Why would you want to
enjoy your life
413
00:17:38,361 --> 00:17:41,147
when you can work yourself
to death with me?
414
00:17:41,321 --> 00:17:43,192
I'm sorry, Dan.
415
00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:46,326
Oh, don't be.
I get it.
416
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:48,545
Ah.
417
00:17:48,719 --> 00:17:50,678
We should celebrate.
418
00:17:50,852 --> 00:17:53,289
Too bad you ain't got
no beer on this boat.
419
00:17:53,463 --> 00:17:55,117
Oh, lift up
the seat cushion.
420
00:17:55,291 --> 00:17:56,118
Which one?
421
00:17:56,292 --> 00:17:57,380
Any one.
422
00:17:58,468 --> 00:17:59,817
[ Chuckles ]
423
00:17:59,991 --> 00:18:01,950
Ta-da!
Whoo!
424
00:18:02,124 --> 00:18:05,127
Oh,
this is so great.
425
00:18:05,301 --> 00:18:07,521
I want to do this
with all my furniture.
[ Laughs ]
426
00:18:09,958 --> 00:18:13,396
♪
427
00:18:13,570 --> 00:18:15,572
Hey, Darlene.
428
00:18:15,746 --> 00:18:17,357
Look who knows
where you live.
429
00:18:17,531 --> 00:18:18,662
Oh.
430
00:18:18,836 --> 00:18:20,316
I'm so sorry,
431
00:18:20,490 --> 00:18:21,970
but I wanted to prepare you
before you got to work.
432
00:18:22,144 --> 00:18:23,580
I tried to move
your parking spot
433
00:18:23,754 --> 00:18:25,756
to the front of the building
by saying you had rickets.
434
00:18:25,930 --> 00:18:27,323
Now they're asking for
a doctor's note,
435
00:18:27,497 --> 00:18:29,717
so we're gonna have to
figure something out.
436
00:18:29,891 --> 00:18:32,285
Okay, sit down.
We need to talk.
437
00:18:32,459 --> 00:18:33,895
I was just gonna
shoot you a text,
438
00:18:34,069 --> 00:18:35,157
but I didn't want you to
freak out,
439
00:18:35,331 --> 00:18:36,115
'cause you know
how you do.
440
00:18:36,289 --> 00:18:37,942
[ Chuckles ]
441
00:18:40,684 --> 00:18:42,077
What are you doing,
Becky?
442
00:18:42,251 --> 00:18:44,471
As the Union Steward,
I feel I should be here
443
00:18:44,645 --> 00:18:47,300
to protect the interests
of this employee.
444
00:18:47,474 --> 00:18:48,170
You can't stay.
445
00:18:48,344 --> 00:18:49,737
Fine.
446
00:18:49,911 --> 00:18:51,434
Good luck
with everything.
447
00:18:51,608 --> 00:18:53,523
I don't need luck.
I let my work do the talking.
448
00:18:53,697 --> 00:18:57,136
[ Laughs ]
Okay.
449
00:18:57,310 --> 00:19:00,139
[ Sighs ] Listen,
here's the thing.
450
00:19:00,313 --> 00:19:02,750
You've been messing up
a lot,
451
00:19:02,924 --> 00:19:05,796
but I'm gonna be the kind of
boss I wish I'd had,
452
00:19:05,970 --> 00:19:07,233
so instead of firing you,
453
00:19:07,407 --> 00:19:09,148
I'm gonna give you
one warning.
454
00:19:09,322 --> 00:19:11,150
Let me stop you
right there.
455
00:19:11,324 --> 00:19:13,804
My job is to protect you.
456
00:19:13,978 --> 00:19:16,067
I'm the Doberman
that's going to protect
457
00:19:16,242 --> 00:19:19,506
the junkyard
that is Darlene Conner.
458
00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:23,118
Okay, I'm gonna give you
an extra warning.
459
00:19:23,292 --> 00:19:25,076
Thank you so much.
If you had fired me,
460
00:19:25,251 --> 00:19:27,122
I don't know what
I would have told Janie.
461
00:19:27,296 --> 00:19:28,732
Who's Janie?
462
00:19:28,906 --> 00:19:30,473
My daughter.
463
00:19:30,647 --> 00:19:33,433
Part of being a good manager
is remember people's names.
464
00:19:33,607 --> 00:19:35,130
This is why you need me.
465
00:19:35,304 --> 00:19:37,437
Your daughter's name
is Ruthie.
466
00:19:37,611 --> 00:19:40,048
Oh, I did say that.
Oops.
467
00:19:40,222 --> 00:19:41,745
I made her up to get the job.
[ Chuckles ]
468
00:19:41,919 --> 00:19:43,617
This is another reason
why you need me.
469
00:19:43,791 --> 00:19:46,054
You're gullible.
470
00:19:46,228 --> 00:19:47,882
Okay, you're fired.
471
00:19:48,056 --> 00:19:49,710
What?!
472
00:19:49,884 --> 00:19:51,625
Look, a-as someone who
considered being your mentor,
473
00:19:51,799 --> 00:19:53,540
you should know
there's something missing
474
00:19:53,714 --> 00:19:55,455
or broken in your head.
475
00:19:55,629 --> 00:19:59,023
I can't have another firing
on my résumé.
476
00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:01,461
I was unemployed for months
before this.
477
00:20:01,635 --> 00:20:05,813
Look, I've been there,
and it is gonna work out.
478
00:20:05,987 --> 00:20:07,641
How?
479
00:20:07,815 --> 00:20:09,599
How am I going to
pay my bills?
480
00:20:09,773 --> 00:20:11,645
Well,
that's a good point.
481
00:20:11,819 --> 00:20:13,647
But you don't have a kid
anymore,
482
00:20:13,821 --> 00:20:14,996
so that'll save you money.
483
00:20:15,170 --> 00:20:17,564
Can you still
be my mentor?
484
00:20:20,175 --> 00:20:23,352
I think that might be hard
since you'll have a new job
485
00:20:23,526 --> 00:20:25,702
and also you won't be allowed
in our building anymore,
486
00:20:25,876 --> 00:20:27,922
'cause that's my next call.
487
00:20:30,838 --> 00:20:32,405
So, I'm super easy
to work for,
488
00:20:32,579 --> 00:20:34,145
and I guess I just have
one question --
489
00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:36,104
you're not gonna
love me too much
490
00:20:36,278 --> 00:20:37,845
and do weird things,
are you?
491
00:20:38,019 --> 00:20:39,586
Oh, no.
[ Chuckles ]
492
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:42,023
You're an atheist
and full of the devil.
493
00:20:42,197 --> 00:20:45,592
I have to pray to God every time
I leave your presence.
494
00:20:45,766 --> 00:20:48,334
Perfect.
We're gonna get along just fine.
495
00:20:48,508 --> 00:20:52,294
Oh. And here is
a picture of Lisa.
496
00:20:52,468 --> 00:20:55,297
One of your jobs
is to keep her away from me.
497
00:20:55,471 --> 00:20:58,039
How permanently do you want me
to do that?
498
00:20:58,213 --> 00:20:59,823
What do you mean?
499
00:20:59,997 --> 00:21:04,872
Well, the hand of God will smite
thine enemies for 250 bucks.
500
00:21:05,046 --> 00:21:08,528
Are you talking about
250 bucks for a hitman?
501
00:21:08,702 --> 00:21:11,095
No.
That would be wrong.
502
00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:13,750
It's a contribution
to my prayer circle.
503
00:21:13,924 --> 00:21:16,492
It worked for my friend
with the abusive husband.
504
00:21:16,666 --> 00:21:18,581
He fell in the shower.
505
00:21:22,846 --> 00:21:25,153
Um, well, I only have a couple
more people to interview,
506
00:21:25,327 --> 00:21:27,416
but I think
this went well.