[Miri] Previously...
[door clangs shut]
[Janice] Okay, six weeks out.
How are you coping with
life outside the facility?
[Miri] I am on it like a car bonnet.
-This is getting silly, Miri. -[Miri] You slept with Dom.
I'm not like you, Dad. I can't just pretend nothing happened.
There are no local environmental groups in this town.
Social media, here I come.
My only purpose is to be the town pariah.
"Tina Tiny Tits, you're so weak, you're a freak"?
And then you become a policewoman with a truncheon.
I was never here. Do you understand?
Yes.
[Miri] I saw Lara's mum-- Mrs. Boback.
[Norah] I've left him.
Miri, if there's something bothering you, then we sh--
Look, nothing is bothering me. It's just, can you just drop it?
I don't forgive you. I can't.
But we have to work it out for Lara.
And also, I need somewhere to stay
before I kill my fucking parents.
[John] It's the rage
I find the hardest, the fury that she gets to live
when she took my little girl from me.
[Janice] Congratulations! The job is yours!
[John] And I want to stop her,
halt her,
destroy her.
[John] There is a crying
In my heart
That never
Will be still
Like the voice
Of a lonely bird
Behind a starry hill
My feet are slow
My eyes are blind
My hands too weak
To hold
It is the universe
I seek
All life
I would enfold
Bye.
[crying] There is a crying
In my heart
That never will
[cries]
[sniffles]
[sniffles, sighs]
[yells]
[sighs]
[sniffles]
tense, haunting music
[birds screeching]
-Hi. -Oh, hi.
-Miri. Yes. -I was just... I was just
-coming to see you. -Yeah?
Um, I'm so sorry about the other day.
Yeah, I thought maybe it was an excuse for you not to--
-Oh, no! No, no, no. -No.
I just had to sort some stuff out.
And I did, and I'm here now.
Well, I'm just packing up some of Anna's stuff, so...
Oh, well, can I help you?
No! No, no, no, don't be silly.
-I can help you. -Really?
Please.
Okay, come on.
Yeah.
-[strumming softly] -[chuckles softly]
She liked stuff.
You must really miss her.
Yeah. Yeah, she was unconventional.
Kind of amazing.
I mean, she'd shit in a box and send it to your mum,
but she'd also flamingo-dance topless
in the middle of Times Square just 'cause she felt like it.
She was an adventure.
I'd never met anyone like her before.
And... I have...
[both chuckle]
...never met anyone like you before, either.
[Miri giggles]
Okay, um, drink?
-Do you want...? Yeah. -Yes. Thank you.
Right, I'll get you...
[inhales sharply, sighs]
Mm-hmm. Oh.
[footsteps approaching]
-Oh! -I got you an Um Bongo
just because... Whoa!
-Oh, no, no, no! No, no, no. -No, no.
-She had a very high-- -You don't need to explain.
-It's fine. Oh. -And what she'd...
Look. It's funny because she would like to pretend
-to be a horse, and I would-- -Oh! Wow! That sounds fun.
-Yeah. [stammers] The thing is, -Yeah. No.
-she sometimes, she sometimes, -Yeah.
-she would like to put these... -Great.
-...up-- -Great. Great. Oh, my God.
I'm so sorry. I've just seen... I remembered
that I have to go to my parents' house...
-Yeah. -'Cause we need
-to get some stuff. -Okay. Yes.
-So I hope I've been of use. -No. wait.
But, um... oh, before I go, I'm just gonna
clear up the mess that I have made.
I can do that. Don't touch that. Please, no, don't touch that.
Oh, that's probably been in a hole.
-An actual asshole. -Okay. [groans]
-Aah! A willy! Oh, my God. -[groans]
-Just-just... -Um, okay.
-I can't get that one in. -All right.
-Look. Hey. -It's okay. It's okay. Look.
This has been so much fun. It's so nice to see you!
-Yes. Yeah. [stammers] -And I'll see you again soon.
-Jesus Christ. [laughs] -Oh, God. Oh, God.
-[shrieks, laughs] -Right. Uh...
-What fun! Bye. -Yeah.
-[footsteps running] -Um...
[door closes]
-I saw Miri. -Which one?
The real one. She was outside Billy's.
I miss her, Oscar.
I don't know what to do with myself.
Well, maybe you should do something
for someone else for a change.
-I do. I... -[camera clicking]
Well, I... Sometimes I...
I can't work out this bloody Instagram thing.
I'm trying to start a "Make Hythe Clean" account,
but I... I keep taking photos of my chin.
Maybe I could help-- take the photo for you.
You're just as bad at phones as I am.
And, anyway, it's all about the selfie, apparently.
[sighs]
soft, whimsical music
[birds screeching]
[phone ringing]
-Hello? -[Janice] Miri, I'm here.
-Where? -Here!
Next to the lube.
What, there's lube on the beach now?
-Christ! -What? No!
I'm-I'm at the supermarket. I just spoke to your boss.
Oh! Oh, can you believe I got the job?
Of course.
Angela's my link. She gives all my girls a chance.
Oh, right. Okay.
But hear what, you can't start yet
because you're not in the system.
-What? -She emailed you?
Well, I don't have an email yet.
Oh.
Listen up, Grandma. You've got to be in the system
by today, or they can't put you on the payroll until next month.
So you need to get down here with your
-National Insurance number-- -Okay.
And, of course, your bank details.
My bank details. Yeah.
Miri, please tell me you've got a bank account.
-I have got a bank account. -Good.
Otherwise, you've flopped this
before you've even started, girl.
[laughs] Now leave me alone.
Oh, shit.
Cherry-flavored. Boom.
Oh.
[coughs]
[birds squawking]
[indistinct chatter]
-I've brought you some-- -Chlamydia?
No. A donation. Food.
And I have time if-if I can be of any use to the church group.
I think this town has had enough of you, Caroline.
soft, whimsical music
Unbelievable.
[sniffles]
Oh.
[footsteps approaching]
I thought you'd gone out.
I've got a sore tummy.
Where are you going?
Rubbish doesn't clear itself.
I've got a town to motivate.
I'd come with you, but I'm Hythe's most hated woman.
Yes, you are fairly divisive.
But they'll forget.
They always do.
But will he?
[sighs]
[phone buzzes]
upbeat, whimsical music
Miri Matteson. It's M-A-T-T--
No, it's not coming up. When did you last use the account?
Um, around Spring 2001?
2001?
-Yeah. -Right. Well, that's
-an awfully long time ago. -I do...
Well, I-I did have an account here.
-In 2001? -Yeah, I just haven't used it.
-Since 2001? -I'm aware that that might seem
a little bit strange.
You haven't used your account for 18 years?
Look, I-I'm not lying! I had all the pigs!
-The pigs? -Yeah. The one in the kilt.
-You had a pig in a kilt? -Yeah. And the one,
-um, with the top hat. -Right.
It's my first week back from maternity leave,
-and I'm knackered. -Yeah, they gave them out. Pigs.
-Course they did. -You may not have been born yet,
but that is what we had as, like, an incentive to bank here.
I had three broken hours of sleep last night.
She means piggy banks, and I had them, too, if it helps.
Fuck off, Dom. I'm so sorry about him.
Right, so if you want a bank account--
Yes, I do. I really, really do.
-She really does. -Just go away!
-Just go online. -I don't have online.
-She's analogue. -Ignore him.
-I'm just trying to help. -Fine. Then just
take this home and fill it in.
-I've got a pen, so-- -Name, address.
No! Can you piss off? Sorry. Piss off! Um,
-so if I am between addresses? -Oh, my God.
There's a really big queue behind you. Just take the form.
Should I just say that I live with my parents?
-If that's where you live, yes. -I don't care.
-Take the form. -I can help you with the form.
No, thank you. Thank you, Sharon.
Next!
...sake.
Wait. I got you a quiche.
I don't want a quiche.
Oh, I'm just trying to make amends.
What, with a quiche?
Well, a girl in my Bible group says it's good
to say sorry if you... well, if you want to start afresh.
What, you've found God now?
I'm just trying to get to know him.
I need any friend I can get.
No! No, no, no. No, I don't want to talk to you
or your mate, the Lord, so just give up.
I understand. You hate me. I let you down.
No, you entirely lived up to my expectations of you.
I just can't be bothered. Ugh!
Why is everything so fucking hard?!
Your mum just sent me a dick pic of my own dick.
[seagulls shrieking]
-What? -I know.
I-I think she's fucking with my head.
Sorry. She sent you a picture of your dick?
-Yeah. -Oh, uh, ugh.
That is smashed, so how do you even know that that--?
I know my own dick when I see it, Miri.
-Right. -So if you see her...
-[scoffs] -...just tell her
that's really hurtful.
And that I don't know what it means.
[laughs]
But tell her that I'm sorry, too.
Yeah? 'Cause I am. It's not funny.
No, I know, but it sort of is. Oh, Christ.
-It really got under my skin. -Oh, I mean, it was probably
a mistake, but, oh, my God, my mum sends sexual pictures now!
Oh, I want you to know that we hardly ever...
-Ugh! -It was mostly, like, hand jobs,
-second base. -Oh, yuck!
Like, sometimes we went to third.
Wait. Which one's boobies?
Oh, just enough of the sex stuff! It's everywhere!
Hey, I've been abstinent for three full weeks, so...
Well, it's been 18 years for me,
and now my mum gives better hand jobs than me
and sends people willy pictures, and people stick things
in their asses that make them look like horses.
And I have had enough, and I have
to find my National Insurance card right now,
or I will not have a job, okay? Goodbye!
Is this woman bothering you?
-Oh, my God! -Do you feel unsafe, sir?
Oh, no. She's my friend.
-I'm not your friend. -What are you doing outside
a bank at this time of day?
I'm planning a robbery, actually.
Right. That's treason. I'm writing that down.
That's not treason. Do you know what treason is?
It's not treason. Oh, my God.
Can everyone just leave me alone, please?
Leonard's on paternity leave, so guess who's covering for him.
-Who? -Me.
-[scoffs softly] -One foot wrong,
and you're back in prison, so don't forget that.
How can I, with you following me everywhere?
Yeah, my point exactly.
[seagulls screeching]
[Miri scoffs]
-Hey, do you want a lift? -No.
-She's following you. -I'm fine!
She's still following you.
hypnotic, percussive music
It smells quite... bummy.
-Does it? -Hmm, yeah.
I don't know. Uh, yeah, maybe.
Twins can be bummy. [laughs]
She... she kicked you out?
-She-- -No. No, I was...
Just like my car.
I like hanging out in it.
-Because it is now your house. -No.
[chuckling] No, it's all good.
We're good. Just...
happy as a Larry.
[Dom sighs]
Um, when we were...
Was I... was I, like...?
Was I okay at stuff?
Oh, you mean like...?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah. -Oh.
I was just grateful for anything.
-Forget it. -Do you mean,
were you better than your mum?
Oh, my God, no! No. No, forget it!
-Oh, no, no, no! [stammers] -Just forget it! Forget it!
You were a really good kisser. I mean, a little toothy
-on the blow job, but... -Oh, la, la, la, la, la, la, la!
But, like, hey, a blow job's a blow job.
I mean, are you looking for tips?
Porn is really great now.
Oh, I'll just nip down to Blockbuster, shall I?
[laughs] No. It's free. Google it.
That-that's what I would do if I wasn't abstinent.
Bye, Dom.
[seagulls screeching]
You try to help. [scoffs]
[inhales sharply]
[exhales]
Tit... wank.
No. No, no, no, no.
Oh, I'm sorry, big guy.
slow, contemplative music
You're late.
It's gone.
They're gonna make it into
a champagne oyster bar, apparently.
They've torn it all out inside.
Our table is still there, though, among the wreckage.
So no chip butties and hot tea?
No.
Do you remember when she tried to catch
a great white with that little ball of string?
All those burly fishermen in a row, and then her. [laughs]
So determined.
[seagulls screeching]
[sighs]
slow, haunting music
What were you gonna do in Bali anyway?
She always wanted to go there.
Do you really think you could cope on your own?
I wasn't thinking straight. I'm sorry.
We-we can go home. We can start again.
You've got your golf tournament on Friday.
No, no, no.
You wanted to be here.
I just wanted to say goodbye to Lara before--
Well, we're here now.
So we're not going anywhere.
There's things to do.
John, please.
I said I'm sorry. Please let's go home.
No.
I don't run away.
-[knocking] -[Caroline] Oh.
I thought you were Oscar.
No.
How are you?
Oh, I'm just looking for some proof of identity.
I need a bank account, or I can't start my job.
Ha!
[clicks tongue] Oh.
[Caroline] Here. This is everything.
Um, National Insurance card, passport, et cetera.
Kept it all safe for you.
-Thanks. -Not a problem.
-Where are you staying? -Uh, Mandy's.
-Oh. -It's temporary. We talked.
Are you okay?
Inflammatory pelvis.
-Because of? -Yeah.
An STD at my age, quite the badge of shame.
-Hmm. -And I deserve it.
Why did you, with Dom?
I mean, you can't have, like, loved him.
-Christ, no! -So, why?
Well, middle-aged men do this all the time.
We don't ask them why. We roll our eyes.
Oh, Mum, come on!
Relationships die without sex.
Well, not all of them do.
And you don't stop wanting to be wanted.
You don't just switch off... and your father has a lower sex--
Oh, right, okay! Enough, enough, enough,
enough, enough, enough, enough.
Oh, I am so sorry.
It was unforgivable.
You sent a dick pic back to him earlier.
-Dick what? -Yeah, I didn't know
what they were until today.
Well, I don't know anything, it seems, so...
Oh, oh, God!
No, no! I was trying to delete the...
Oh, Christ! Miri, you have to believe me. I--
Yeah, no, okay. I-I do. Don't worry.
-[sighs] -Anyway,
it really fucked with his head.
Hmm. Well, good.
Your room's always here if you need it.
Thanks.
soft, gentle music
Oh. Hello.
Hi.
Yeah.
I've just got to--
-Yeah, me too. I've got... Yeah. -Yeah.
[chuckles]
[laughs softly]
[Oscar] What's the world come to?
Forgetting to rinse tins,
plastic wrapping, perfectly good food...
Oh, fiddlesticks!
Bloody coffee cups.
Whoa. I don't want any trouble, man.
I just... I wanted to give you this.
A quiche?
Well, it's an apology.
No. It's a quiche.
For intercoursing my wife?
Look, you should forgive me.
You know, I-I forgave myself, and it felt great.
You're interrupting my livestream.
I'm giving you ten seconds.
-Ten. -All right.
-All right. All right. -Nine. Eight.
-All right! -Seven. six.
[grumbles]
You should get a selfie stick, by the way.
Yeah.
There we go. That is just a leaflet about Internet banking.
-Thanks. -Yeah.
Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no.
You work on commission? Big mistake. Big. Huge.
I've always wanted to say that.
You probably don't know that reference
because you're too young, but it's from the film Pretty Woman
where, um, Julia Roberts, the prostitute-- sex worker--
she goes back to the shop that wouldn't serve her before,
and then she shows 'em how rich she is now,
but then she won't shop there because they were too mean.
And they're like, "Ugh!"
Their faces are an absolute sight. [laughs]
So you-you won't be banking with us?
Oh, no. No, that's... Sorry.
No, that's not what I meant. [chuckles] So, here. Thank you.
So you would like to bank with us?
Yes, please. I'd love to. Thanks.
Oh, my God.
On further analysis, that quote doesn't entirely mirror
-this particular situation. -No, not remotely.
But it... you know, it felt right. The spirit of it.
-It felt right. -And your account details.
Please never come to my counter again.
[gasps] Thank you, Sharon. I promise I won't.
I love you. And get some sleep, okay?
Bye.
soft, upbeat music
I've got an account!
[Caroline humming a tune]
[continues humming]
[stops humming]
Thank you, but I think we both need to move on.
My Instagram account is on fire.
Three likes in four hours.
I've got a really good feeling about this.
-What on earth is that? -Well, it's a selfie stick.
I made it myself.
I'm just getting started.
Had a good chat with Miri, finally.
-And I'm feeling a bit better. -Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
I'm about to post a story.
You can watch me live if you like!
slow, quiet music
-Hey, Janice, it's me. -[Janice] Who?
It's Miri. I'm in the system.
-I start on Thursday. -Great.
I'm busy. Go celebrate with your boyfriend.
Oh, I'm going to.
But put some makeup on for once.
Hey, I might be wearing makeup. Why are you laughing?
slow, sinister music
[soft moaning on tablet]
I got the job.
-Hey, which job? -Uh, the... Uh, anyway,
I'm gonna go and see Billy. Can I borrow some makeup?
-Yeah, yeah. -Sorry. What is that noise?!
Oh, it's porn.
-What? -Yeah.
-Now? -[man and woman moaning]
Oh, look at her eyes. They're so sad.
Don't look at her eyes, Miri. Look at her tits.
But they're not her tits.
Ow! Oh! Where have everyone's pubes gone?
'Cause I have a lot of pubes. Sorry. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God, is that what people are doing now?
-Are you okay? -Because I can't.
-I don't know how to do that. -Are you--?
-No, I mean, I'm-I'm... -Okay.
I'm having a bit of a panic.
I think that part of me is dead.
-Okay. -What if it's dead? I can't--
Okay, Miri, calm down. Calm down, okay?
-I can't. -Okay, kay, kay, kay. All right.
Have you had a-a little, a little...
tingle in your pants yet with Billy?
A little... a little fanny tingle?
-Yeah. -Yeah?
Then you'll be fine.
-Really? -Yeah.
-Yeah. Yeah. -Okay.
-Yeah? [laughs softly] -Yes.
-Hmm. -[grunting over tablet]
I'm gonna borrow your daughter's bike.
No, don't. Seriously, she'll kill you.
soft, upbeat music
[siren toots]
Oh, my God, what?
Where are you going at such a pace?
I need to see a boy because, uh, uh...
It's none of your business.
Oh, greedy pussy. I remember.
-What?! -You're going over
-the speed limit. -I am cycling.
Yeah, on a pavement.
It's a... it's a promenade. Are you gonna ticket me?
I'm out of tickets.
But consider yourself ticketed if I had 'em.
-Look, can I please go? -No!
But you can go.
-Right now, but if I see you-- -What?
Legally cycling on a promenade?
-Yes! -Then what are you gonna do?
Probably exactly the same thing, but with a ticket.
Good for you! Now excuse me.
I've got a great big greedy pussy to feed.
See you, Teens.
soft, upbeat music
[sighs]
Oh, no.
Yes, come on! You can... you can do this.
You've got this.
-[doorbell rings] -Fuck.
-Hi. Hi. -Hi. Hi.
Listen, um, um, I'm so sorry, I, uh...
I panicked.
I'm a bit out of the loop. Um,
so I... I may never put something inanimate up my bum,
but I wanted you to know
that I do really, really...
Oh.
Oh, tingle.
-[laughs] -Oh.
-Yeah. -I, um...
I never expected you to put anything up your--
Shh, shh.
-What? -Good night, Billy.
Right, yes. Okay.
Oh. Okay.
Bye.
Please don't watch me go. It's gonna take ages.
[laughs] Yeah.
-Good night. -Night.
Oh. [laughs]
-I'm very smooth. -You are.
Bye!
tense, dramatic music
[shuddering breaths]
"Hey, Who Really Cares?"
Been coming down
For a long time
Changes coming down
On me
Can't seem to carry them all now...
-[yells] -[engine revving]
-[tires squeal, engine revs] -[panting]
[gasping]
Ow. [sighs]
[panting]
"Hey, Who Really Cares?"