1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:03,800
ANIMALS BLEAT
2
00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:05,200
ALL CHATTER
3
00:00:05,200 --> 00:00:06,680
He's back! Mick's back!
4
00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:08,600
Mick?! Mick's back!
5
00:00:08,600 --> 00:00:11,520
Mick's back! He is! Look!
6
00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:15,600
Hi, everyone!
7
00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:15,600
ALL CHATTER EXCITEDLY
8
00:00:15,600 --> 00:00:18,880
All right, all right! One at a time,
let him speak! Speak, Mick.
9
00:00:18,880 --> 00:00:22,440
Oh, it was the adventure
of my life. I had an orange.
10
00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:24,200
Did you? Oh!
11
00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:25,840
I saw a bear kill a man.
12
00:00:25,840 --> 00:00:28,280
Oh, gosh!
13
00:00:28,280 --> 00:00:30,360
And I met the king.
14
00:00:30,360 --> 00:00:32,520
No, you didn't! Did you?
15
00:00:32,520 --> 00:00:34,600
YOU met the king?
16
00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:36,640
Yep. Ooh, jel.
17
00:00:36,640 --> 00:00:38,480
Went on his boat. Fishing.
18
00:00:38,480 --> 00:00:40,800
Fishing... Yeah, he asked
me to join his court,
19
00:00:40,800 --> 00:00:43,320
but I said no way
I'm leaving you lot.
20
00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:46,520
You didn't! Sweetie! Mick!
21
00:00:46,520 --> 00:00:49,440
I'd always wanted to visit
the city, hadn't I? So...
22
00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:52,400
You have. That's always been your
dream, actually. You had, yeah.
23
00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:54,320
Ooh, almost forgot!
24
00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:56,200
I got you all some gifts!
25
00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:58,480
That's naughty of you!
26
00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:58,480
ALL CHATTER EXCITEDLY
27
00:00:58,480 --> 00:01:01,800
You didn't think I'd go all that way
without bringing you back something!
28
00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:03,600
Got loads of salt.
29
00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:06,160
THEY CHATTER IN APPRECIATION
30
00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:08,360
And... For us?!
31
00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:10,840
Look at them! I can't
believe you've done that!
32
00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:12,200
Yeah!
33
00:01:12,200 --> 00:01:14,080
ALL CHATTER
34
00:01:12,200 --> 00:01:14,080
That's so generous of you!
35
00:01:14,080 --> 00:01:16,080
Yeah, one each! Yeah!
36
00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:18,440
Help yourselves.
Mick, that's naughty...
37
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:21,280
Help yourselves!
38
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:21,280
HE CHUCKLES
39
00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:23,040
HE COUGHS
40
00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:25,720
VILLAGERS CHATTER HAPPILY
41
00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:25,720
Look at it!
42
00:02:02,640 --> 00:02:05,560
Alison.
43
00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:07,360
CLEARS THROAT
44
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:08,880
Alison!
45
00:02:08,880 --> 00:02:11,200
Alison! Alison!
46
00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:14,640
MUFFLED DIN
47
00:02:14,640 --> 00:02:16,480
SHE GROANS
48
00:02:14,640 --> 00:02:16,480
DISTORTED: Alison! Alison!
49
00:02:16,480 --> 00:02:19,440
SHE WINCES
50
00:02:16,480 --> 00:02:19,440
Oh, my God...
51
00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:22,200
Alison! Alison!
52
00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:22,200
SHE GROANS
53
00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:23,760
Alison!
54
00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:25,200
Oh, my God...
55
00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:28,480
Alison! Alison...!
56
00:02:28,480 --> 00:02:30,120
Right. Stand by.
57
00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:32,080
Ready, steady, go!
58
00:02:32,080 --> 00:02:34,000
For King and country!
59
00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,960
Oh, I feel so sick...
60
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:39,040
Can you get me some water?
61
00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:40,560
CROAKY: Get your own w...
62
00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:43,800
CROAKY: I've lost my voice.
63
00:02:43,800 --> 00:02:47,200
I don't remember leaving the pub.
Must've had fun.
64
00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:49,480
At least we don't
have to work today.
65
00:02:50,520 --> 00:02:52,760
SHE SIGHS AND GROANS
66
00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:56,920
MOBILE PHONE VIBRATES
67
00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:00,560
Make it stop...
68
00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:03,000
SHE COUGHS
69
00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:05,120
Hello?
70
00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:07,320
Sorry, who from who?
71
00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:11,440
Isabelle from Belle's Weddings?
72
00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:12,800
HE GROANS
73
00:03:12,800 --> 00:03:15,080
Yeah, aw, thanks for
getting in touch.
74
00:03:15,080 --> 00:03:18,560
Yeah, we're really keen
to be on your books...
75
00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:21,320
..if you'll have us.
76
00:03:21,320 --> 00:03:23,600
It's a lovely house.
77
00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:25,800
Today?
78
00:03:25,800 --> 00:03:27,800
I wonder if...if...
79
00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:30,720
No, no, no, no, no. Oh, no. OK,
today... Today's fine. Today's fine.
80
00:03:30,720 --> 00:03:31,880
HE GROANS
81
00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:34,440
Maybe just sort of,
like, late, after...
82
00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:36,320
One o'clock, is it? OK.
83
00:03:36,320 --> 00:03:38,040
All right.
84
00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:40,280
OK, bye!
85
00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:43,320
Oh, my God. OK, I just
need to shake this off...
86
00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:46,040
Ohhh...
87
00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:46,040
SHE PUFFS
88
00:03:46,040 --> 00:03:48,400
Bit of breakfast...
89
00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:50,120
We'll be fine.
90
00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:00,600
SOBBING
91
00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:13,080
Shut your mouth! It is a mansion!
92
00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:14,720
Yeah, boy!
93
00:04:16,320 --> 00:04:18,760
The impertinence!
94
00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:20,720
Oh, this looks like fun!
95
00:04:20,720 --> 00:04:22,760
The bally nerve! It's gone midnight.
96
00:04:22,760 --> 00:04:25,560
Yeah, it is very late.
Yeah, absolutely.
97
00:04:25,560 --> 00:04:28,520
Welcome to my house!
98
00:04:25,560 --> 00:04:28,520
ALL CHEER
99
00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:32,520
CROAKY: Alison!
100
00:04:32,520 --> 00:04:34,680
Alison...! Oh...!
101
00:04:36,640 --> 00:04:38,280
Oh...!
102
00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:42,160
SHE GASPS
103
00:04:47,640 --> 00:04:49,680
QUIET SNORING
104
00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:51,400
They came back.
105
00:04:55,280 --> 00:04:57,480
I think I did my throat bass.
106
00:04:57,480 --> 00:05:00,280
HE BEATBOXES
107
00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:04,240
Yeah, you did.
108
00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:06,400
Oh.
109
00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:09,840
Shall we just call back and
cancel? No way, we need it.
110
00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:11,840
We can get this clean in time.
111
00:05:11,840 --> 00:05:12,960
Oh...
112
00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:16,600
Have you seen my other shoe?
113
00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:18,480
Mm-mm...
114
00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:20,320
OK.
115
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:23,160
You get people out and I'll...
116
00:05:23,160 --> 00:05:26,720
I'm going to get bin bags.
117
00:05:23,160 --> 00:05:26,720
SHE EXHALES
118
00:05:26,720 --> 00:05:28,640
Right...
119
00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:36,680
COUGHING NEARBY
120
00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:38,280
SHE COUGHS
121
00:05:38,280 --> 00:05:39,800
She awakes.
122
00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:41,400
Oh, God...
123
00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:44,360
As radiant as the sunrise itself.
124
00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:46,640
My mouth tastes like
the inside of a bin.
125
00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:49,080
I would have made you
breakfast, if I could.
126
00:05:49,080 --> 00:05:52,600
Perhaps lamb's kidney and onion...
Oh, stop it!
127
00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:55,160
I wanted to thank you
for last night.
128
00:05:55,160 --> 00:05:58,080
I'll never forget those
words you said to me.
129
00:05:58,080 --> 00:06:00,160
What did I say?
130
00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:03,000
Something that touched
me very deeply.
131
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:07,280
Forgive me, I know I've not
had a formal invitation,
132
00:06:07,280 --> 00:06:08,720
but I wonder if I might...
133
00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:10,760
Oh, Thomas, it's fine.
You're part of the family.
134
00:06:10,760 --> 00:06:12,480
Thank you, Alison.
135
00:06:12,480 --> 00:06:14,520
A thousand thank yous!
136
00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:17,600
UPBEAT DANCE MUSIC
137
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:26,760
Oh, that. Yeah, yeah, I meant it.
138
00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:28,840
HE SQUEAKS
139
00:06:28,840 --> 00:06:30,520
Are you OK?
140
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:35,600
OK.
141
00:06:35,600 --> 00:06:37,560
Hello? It's home time.
142
00:06:37,560 --> 00:06:39,280
MAN GROANS
143
00:06:42,320 --> 00:06:44,160
Come on, man. It's time to go.
144
00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:45,840
Why do you sound like Batman?
145
00:06:45,840 --> 00:06:48,520
I lost my voice. You've
got to go home, bruv.
146
00:06:48,520 --> 00:06:50,720
Got a wedding planner coming to
look at the house in two hours.
147
00:06:50,720 --> 00:06:52,520
Come on, then.
148
00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:56,040
Where are your shoes?
149
00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:58,280
LOUD DRILLING
150
00:06:58,280 --> 00:06:59,960
I'll go.
151
00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:01,800
DRILLING CONTINUES
152
00:07:09,440 --> 00:07:12,720
INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE
153
00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:15,840
Ah! Oh, hi, Michael.
Sorry about that.
154
00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:19,000
I was just wondering if you
could just save the drilling.
155
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:21,600
We're a bit fragile.
We're actually just finished.
156
00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:23,440
At last!
157
00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:23,440
ALL MURMUR
158
00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:25,280
We'll miss them, won't we?
159
00:07:25,280 --> 00:07:27,640
We made rather an exciting
discovery, actually.
160
00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:30,440
Because, you see, none of the
surrounding villages were struck,
161
00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:33,000
so we know the disease
was brought here...
162
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:34,880
ALL MURMUR
163
00:07:34,880 --> 00:07:37,920
...by a visitor or an individual
who went elsewhere and returned.
164
00:07:37,920 --> 00:07:40,080
It could be anyone,
I suppose, couldn't it?
165
00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:43,080
But then we found a few
samples of textiles and furs,
166
00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:47,240
and we can be certain that they
were host to plague-carrying fleas.
167
00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:50,200
Once they got out,
you've got no chance.
168
00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:52,680
Everyone's dead!
169
00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:52,680
HE CHUCKLES
170
00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,920
I'm so sorry. I didn't know.
171
00:07:57,920 --> 00:08:00,680
I don't think sorry's
going to cut it, mate.
172
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,720
Ah, Alison, there you are!
173
00:08:04,720 --> 00:08:07,920
Would you mind putting Guernsey's
Nazi Past on the VCR for me, please?
174
00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:09,680
I haven't watched my football yet.
175
00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:12,080
Would you kindly tell Patrick
that he missed his turn
176
00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:13,800
and a miss is as good as a mile?
177
00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:15,480
Guys, please, can you keep it down?
178
00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:17,600
No, Alison, I'm sorry...
I don't care!
179
00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:19,320
She doesn't!
180
00:08:19,320 --> 00:08:21,360
Alison...
181
00:08:19,320 --> 00:08:21,360
SHE SOBS
182
00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:23,680
Oh, I... Actually, I can't...
183
00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:26,120
I can't deal with this this morning.
184
00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:28,920
So hungover I actually, genuinely...
I do think I'm going to die.
185
00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:30,560
Hm, you need a remedy.
186
00:08:30,560 --> 00:08:33,000
Hair of the dog, love.
Just drink more booze.
187
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,880
Did you say that last night?
188
00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:36,920
Yes. I have the cure.
189
00:08:36,920 --> 00:08:40,360
Soak some mushrooms in milk
of the goat and vinegar
190
00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:42,760
till it's all warm and musty...
191
00:08:42,760 --> 00:08:44,440
No, stop it. Stop it now.
192
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:48,520
Well, you see, Alison, this is
what happens when you overindulge.
193
00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:51,640
Square! When you give
in to gay abandon.
194
00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:54,600
You reap what you sow.
You reap what you sow,
195
00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:56,720
and now the soil returns...
196
00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:58,400
Hey.
197
00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,520
Morrow.
198
00:09:03,720 --> 00:09:05,720
Oh, actually, no, yeah, good.
199
00:09:05,720 --> 00:09:07,520
Hey, look. Cola!
200
00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:09,520
Best thing for it.
201
00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:12,160
SHE SPITS
202
00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:12,160
Oh, God, that is...!
203
00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:14,600
Oh, no, sorry.
Ah, here she is!
204
00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:16,720
The madam! The hostess!
205
00:09:16,720 --> 00:09:19,440
Just when I think you have
grasped the responsibility
206
00:09:19,440 --> 00:09:22,960
of the family seat, you turn this
place into a den of iniquity,
207
00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:26,520
inviting goodness-knows-who
to do goodness-knows-what!
208
00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:30,120
SHE GASPS
209
00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:30,120
Sorry, I think someone's hid
210
00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:30,120
my clothes. Good Lord.
211
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:33,240
I shudder to think what happened
under this roof last night.
212
00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:35,760
This place is full of breakables,
213
00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:38,720
treasured family heirlooms,
irreplaceable bits of historical...
214
00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:42,280
Nothing's damaged, and it's just
a mess that I'm cleaning up,
215
00:09:42,280 --> 00:09:44,560
so just don't...don't worry.
216
00:09:44,560 --> 00:09:46,920
Well, don't think I won't notice.
217
00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:52,000
Oh, God!
218
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:53,720
Where's Dante?
219
00:09:53,720 --> 00:09:55,200
Dante?
220
00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:56,360
The dog.
221
00:09:57,960 --> 00:09:59,600
SHE GASPS
222
00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:01,640
DANCE MUSIC
223
00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:05,920
ALL LAUGH
224
00:10:05,920 --> 00:10:09,000
Can we get a photo with him?
Oh, yes, let's get a photo, girls!
225
00:10:10,520 --> 00:10:13,120
Have you got your phone?
A photograph with the girls!
226
00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:14,760
Here's to me, too!
227
00:10:14,760 --> 00:10:16,560
Cheers! Cheers!
228
00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:19,200
Kitty's having a wonderful
time at the party!
229
00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:22,080
Don't forget me!
That's good! My turn!
230
00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:24,520
My turn! Take a photo with me!
231
00:10:24,520 --> 00:10:27,320
Alison! Alison, sorry to bother you.
232
00:10:27,320 --> 00:10:30,080
The captain asked me
to convey a message.
233
00:10:30,080 --> 00:10:33,320
Just to turn the music off,
234
00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:36,880
and to "cease the
talking immediately."
235
00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:38,880
Tell him to stick it.
236
00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:40,560
OK.
237
00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:44,840
Oh...
238
00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:51,680
Oh!
239
00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:55,240
He's not here.
240
00:10:55,240 --> 00:10:57,120
Ooh, you're in trouble now.
241
00:10:57,120 --> 00:10:59,320
But I thought he
was just an ornament.
242
00:10:59,320 --> 00:11:02,400
No, he did mean a lot to Lady B.
Loved it like her own child.
243
00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:05,440
Once told me she loved it more
than anything else in the world.
244
00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:07,080
Well, I'm sure that...
245
00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:09,680
Thanks, Alison. Great party!
Same time next week.
246
00:11:09,680 --> 00:11:12,320
Ha-ha-ha. No. Don't think so, mate.
247
00:11:22,680 --> 00:11:24,320
LAUGHTER
248
00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:26,280
Good luck, mate!
You're not going to make it.
249
00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:28,760
Oh! Oh, yes!
250
00:11:28,760 --> 00:11:30,600
Yeah, boy!
251
00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:36,680
Ready? I was born ready.
252
00:11:36,680 --> 00:11:39,840
'Tis a fair old wangle, that.
You haven't got the strength.
253
00:11:39,840 --> 00:11:41,560
I got this.
254
00:11:41,560 --> 00:11:43,440
Whoa! Ha-hey!
255
00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:46,400
"Stick it"?! Wahey!
Afraid so.
256
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:48,720
In my bottom, presumably. Oh!
257
00:11:48,720 --> 00:11:51,440
Well, you go down there
and you tell her...
258
00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:53,040
Me turn!
259
00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:55,240
Whoa! Whoa!
260
00:11:55,240 --> 00:11:57,480
Wahey!
261
00:11:57,480 --> 00:11:59,800
Yes! Well done!
262
00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:03,320
Told you! It's a stupid
game, anyway.
263
00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:05,720
You stupid.
264
00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,000
HE CHUCKLES
265
00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:10,880
I didn't think this through...
266
00:12:10,880 --> 00:12:12,240
Uh...
267
00:12:17,920 --> 00:12:19,480
CROAKY: Just getting my shoes.
268
00:12:19,480 --> 00:12:22,080
I can't say I'm surprised that
something like this would happen.
269
00:12:22,080 --> 00:12:24,120
I'll have to tell her,
of course. What? No!
270
00:12:24,120 --> 00:12:26,600
I will not allow Fanny to be
deceived like this, to be...
271
00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:28,960
No more war documentaries, then.
Your secret's safe with me.
272
00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:31,040
It's classified.
She'd have to kill me first.
273
00:12:31,040 --> 00:12:34,160
Well, you know what I mean.
Right. Find the dog. Clean up.
274
00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:35,640
Two hours...
275
00:12:35,640 --> 00:12:37,560
Oh, my word...! Ahh!
276
00:12:37,560 --> 00:12:39,360
What are you doing up here?!
277
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:41,640
We're actually going to
live up here now, actually.
278
00:12:41,640 --> 00:12:42,720
SHE SIGHS
279
00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:44,840
Mick killed us all.
Which is not remotely cool.
280
00:12:44,840 --> 00:12:46,560
MURMURS OF AGREEMENT
281
00:12:44,840 --> 00:12:46,560
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
282
00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:49,040
We can't be sharing the
place with these plebeians.
283
00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:50,960
What? He gave us all the plague.
284
00:12:50,960 --> 00:12:52,160
Yeah, look.
285
00:12:52,160 --> 00:12:53,800
ALL GROAN
286
00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:56,320
And this.
287
00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:56,320
ALISON GAGS
288
00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:58,880
And this. Oh, what even is it?
289
00:12:58,880 --> 00:13:01,400
Guys, please! Oh, here she is!
290
00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:04,440
Guys, please, please...
Piss off, Mick!
291
00:13:04,440 --> 00:13:06,800
Can you please go back downstairs?
292
00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:09,720
Because, no offence, but you're
actually making me feel really sick.
293
00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:11,400
We're not going anywhere.
294
00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:13,720
Mick should go if anyone's doing
going! Yeah, he's a killer!
295
00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:16,680
ALL MURMUR
296
00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:16,680
Order! Order!
297
00:13:16,680 --> 00:13:18,720
We need to come to an
understanding here.
298
00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:20,360
These...people...
299
00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:22,200
People? Yeah. People.
300
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:25,800
These people deserve a
full inquiry, chaired by me.
301
00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:28,040
Get to the bottom of this business.
302
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:31,120
Ha! You couldn't get to
the bottom of a birdbath.
303
00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:35,240
I'll have you know I have extensive
experience of public inquiries.
304
00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:39,920
Nice to be the one ASKING the
questions, for a change. Ha-ha...
305
00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:42,560
Come on, then, oiks.
Come on, let's go.
306
00:13:42,560 --> 00:13:45,160
Not all of you.
Just your sharpest minds.
307
00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:46,880
Well, that's definitely me. You go.
308
00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:48,720
Do I have to come?
Yeah, you have to come.
309
00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:50,600
It's all about you, innit?
Right, you stay here.
310
00:13:50,600 --> 00:13:52,840
No, you stay. You definitely stay.
311
00:13:52,840 --> 00:13:54,720
Right, you guys search for Dante.
312
00:13:54,720 --> 00:13:56,600
And tell the others.
I've got to clear up.
313
00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:58,480
Patrick, you get the others...
You find the others...
314
00:13:58,480 --> 00:14:00,240
I'll begin the search.
I'll search upstairs.
315
00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:01,720
BOTH: I'm not taking
orders from you!
316
00:14:01,720 --> 00:14:03,760
What is the matter
with you two this morning?
317
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:05,600
Can you just find the dog? Please.
318
00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:07,280
Well...
319
00:14:15,760 --> 00:14:17,840
Ah, boy.
320
00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:24,000
Don't do it, mate.
Whatever it is, don't do it.
321
00:14:28,240 --> 00:14:30,360
HATCH CLUNKS
322
00:14:30,360 --> 00:14:33,080
Oh. No, no, no, no, no...
323
00:14:35,280 --> 00:14:36,760
Come on!
324
00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:43,560
CROAKY: Alison!
325
00:14:43,560 --> 00:14:46,320
WEAKLY: Alison!
326
00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:47,840
She can't hear you.
327
00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:49,680
I can't hear you.
328
00:15:02,480 --> 00:15:04,120
JULIAN: Yes, here we go.
329
00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:07,680
A bit more of that.
It's called a Long and Strong.
330
00:15:07,680 --> 00:15:09,880
It's called a Long and Strong.
331
00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:12,360
And a slug of dark rum.
Dark rum!
332
00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:13,720
Yeah. Oh!
333
00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:15,840
Oh, no! I spilt wine on him.
334
00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:17,800
I've heard white wine helps.
335
00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:20,480
Got it. Oh, yeah, salt helps.
336
00:15:20,480 --> 00:15:22,080
Is that helping?
337
00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:23,960
Maybe try white wine.
338
00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:26,320
Actually, white wine's meant
to be best, isn't it?
339
00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:28,520
I said it first!
340
00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:32,280
Nice little bath!
341
00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:33,800
I said it first!
342
00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:38,640
That's a good dog. You're fine.
343
00:15:45,680 --> 00:15:47,200
Where are you?
344
00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:49,760
Who? Who are you looking for?
345
00:15:49,760 --> 00:15:51,720
Nothing. No-one. Mike.
346
00:15:51,720 --> 00:15:53,760
Ah. Well, I saw him going upstairs.
347
00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:56,920
No trousers on. No shoes.
At this hour!
348
00:15:56,920 --> 00:15:58,400
I'll tell him.
349
00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:00,040
Hmm.
350
00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:03,640
Oh, God...
351
00:16:08,480 --> 00:16:10,920
And, Mick, is it fair to say
352
00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:15,440
that these boxes of cloths
and furs could have been
353
00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:17,800
brought in by anyone?
354
00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:21,000
No, I brought that box back
when I come back from London
355
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:25,000
when I gone there. He confesses!
Killer! He's just admitted to it!
356
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,160
Order! Order!
357
00:16:27,160 --> 00:16:29,280
ALL TALK TOGETHER
358
00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:31,120
Shut up a second, please!
359
00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:34,440
Oh, right, you do it for her!
Has anyone seen a stuffed dog?
360
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,360
Mick probably killed it.
Gone walkies, has he?
361
00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:38,640
Yeah.
362
00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:42,000
You can't teach an old dog new
tricks! Oh, yeah, love that one.
363
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,240
DANCE MUSIC
364
00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:46,920
PLAYS ALONG TO MUSIC ON PIANO
365
00:16:50,360 --> 00:16:53,080
Hey, stay out
of my personal dance space!
366
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:55,320
You call that dancing?
367
00:16:55,320 --> 00:16:57,280
You do but bounce, boy!
368
00:16:57,280 --> 00:16:59,360
I bounce good!
369
00:17:15,400 --> 00:17:18,040
CAPTAIN: Stop it! Stop it!
370
00:17:18,040 --> 00:17:20,760
Patrick! Patrick!
What on God's green Earth
371
00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:22,680
do you think you're
playing at, man?!
372
00:17:22,680 --> 00:17:25,480
Well... I sent you down
here to stop this nonsense,
373
00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:27,320
and now you're joining in!
374
00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:30,320
Carousing! You are a
spineless little traitor!
375
00:17:30,320 --> 00:17:32,360
Oh, naff off, you wazzock!
376
00:17:32,360 --> 00:17:33,600
Yes!
377
00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:35,520
ALL CHEER
378
00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:41,280
Go out of it!
You'll see. Right!
379
00:17:43,120 --> 00:17:44,720
CAPTAIN: He's the wazzock...
380
00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:48,360
Oh, there, there. What ails thee?
381
00:17:48,360 --> 00:17:53,240
SOBBING: Alison...hates me!
382
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,360
SHE WAILS
383
00:17:55,360 --> 00:18:00,440
Let it all out. I always feel
better after little cry.
384
00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:02,960
SHE SOBS
385
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:05,960
DANCE MUSIC
386
00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:10,800
Have a little rest in here.
387
00:18:12,880 --> 00:18:14,480
Oh.
388
00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:19,280
Oh, God...!
389
00:18:19,280 --> 00:18:21,600
Oh, half an hour!
390
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:23,320
Mike!
391
00:18:23,320 --> 00:18:25,600
I could really do with
your help down here!
392
00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:27,680
WEAKLY: I could do with
your help up here!
393
00:18:32,480 --> 00:18:34,560
Ah. I've just checked in there.
394
00:18:34,560 --> 00:18:36,880
Well, I'd like to check for
myself, please, Patrick.
395
00:18:36,880 --> 00:18:39,120
Fine. Fine. Checking what?
396
00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:41,040
In my room?
397
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:42,760
Mice.
398
00:18:42,760 --> 00:18:45,240
Yes. Robin spotted some
earlier in the kitchen.
399
00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:48,760
And we know you're not fond,
so we thought we'd...ch-check.
400
00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:50,480
# Dante!
401
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:52,840
# Dan...
402
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:55,080
# ..iel. #
403
00:18:55,080 --> 00:18:56,640
Who's Daniel?
404
00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:59,680
Oh, I was just doing a
song about the nice names.
405
00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:02,600
# Daniel, Veronica
406
00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:05,040
# Clive, Annie. #
407
00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:07,080
Ugh.
408
00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:09,080
I already checked in there.
409
00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:11,880
No-one listen to me.
I don't know why I bother.
410
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:20,360
Sorry.
411
00:19:23,080 --> 00:19:25,640
MUFFLED DANCE MUSIC
412
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,680
Oh, she sleeps now.
413
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:33,240
Look so peaceful.
414
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:36,080
SLOW SOUL MUSIC
415
00:19:54,840 --> 00:19:56,800
Oh!
416
00:19:56,800 --> 00:19:59,480
Right, well, he's not in there.
No need to look again.
417
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,560
What's going on?
You are. What?
418
00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:09,240
CROAKS: Tony!
419
00:20:11,080 --> 00:20:12,840
Tony! Tony! Tony!
420
00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:15,360
Tone... No, no, no, no.
421
00:20:15,360 --> 00:20:17,480
Tone... Tone... Tony! Tony!
422
00:20:17,480 --> 00:20:19,400
HE SIGHS
423
00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:33,240
Long way down! You know that.
424
00:20:33,240 --> 00:20:34,760
Oh...
425
00:20:36,880 --> 00:20:39,040
Any luck? Negative.
Nothing, I'm afraid.
426
00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:40,600
And you? Nuh.
427
00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:42,040
I might know where he is.
428
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:44,040
Oh, thank goodness, Kitty. Where?
429
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:47,680
Oh, you can hear me now, can you?
You've decided I exist again?
430
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:50,200
Oh, God. Kitty, you know
that it's very difficult
431
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,440
when other people are around.
432
00:20:52,440 --> 00:20:55,800
Actually, I think I tried
to tell you that last night.
433
00:20:57,120 --> 00:20:59,800
I'm so sorry, Kitty, but
I can't talk right now,
434
00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:02,240
because I've got guests here.
435
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:05,040
Kitty, I'm so sorry, but
I can't talk right now
436
00:21:05,040 --> 00:21:06,960
because I've got guests here.
437
00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:08,880
Kitty, I'm so sorry, but I...
438
00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:12,880
Oh! I thought you were talking
to someone else called Kitty.
439
00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:14,400
No.
440
00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:17,440
Well, that's fine, then!
Friends forever.
441
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:19,720
Great. Great.
442
00:21:19,720 --> 00:21:21,640
Yes, so where's Dante?
443
00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:23,640
Have you tried by the front door?
444
00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:25,840
That's where he usually is.
445
00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:31,040
Thank you, Kitty. You're welcome!
446
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:33,800
There's no way we're going
back down there with him.
447
00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:36,360
I said I was sorry.
I'm really sorry.
448
00:21:36,360 --> 00:21:38,760
You killed my kids, mate.
I've got a boil the size of...
449
00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:41,520
Look, look, look, we all have
disagreements, you know,
450
00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:45,160
but we move on. I'm sure you can all
remember something that annoyed you
451
00:21:45,160 --> 00:21:47,760
at the time, but that
after a while... You know.
452
00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,040
Yeah, like when John milked
my cow without asking.
453
00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:52,000
There you are. I asked your wife.
454
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:54,480
That's not good enough, though,
is it? So I can't make decisions
455
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:56,520
in my own marriage?
No, what I'm saying...
456
00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:58,720
Walter ate my best apple.
Only cos he widdled on my art.
457
00:21:58,720 --> 00:22:00,160
He did do that. I saw him. Yeah.
458
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:01,800
I improved it, if anything. What?
459
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:04,280
Yeah, you can't do faces.
I'm sorry, you can't do faces.
460
00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:05,600
What's that got to do...?
461
00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:07,920
I would have killed you if he hadn't
killed you! I would've bled you.
462
00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:10,880
I would have bled you out...
Order! Order!
463
00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:14,080
ALL TALK AT ONCE
464
00:22:14,080 --> 00:22:17,960
Mike? What are you doing?
She'll be here soon!
465
00:22:19,440 --> 00:22:21,960
So, how goes the search?
466
00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:23,560
What, for the dog or the husband?
467
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:26,720
Ha! You'd think he'd be more
helpful in your hour of need.
468
00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:28,480
Yeah, you'd think, wouldn't you?
469
00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:31,560
I've been thinking...about
what you said.
470
00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:35,320
And I know nothing has changed. But
everything has changed, has it not?
471
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:37,200
If we could only... Mike!
472
00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:39,440
Honestly, he's
probably asleep again.
473
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,360
Snoring, as he was last night.
474
00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:43,800
What?
475
00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:45,600
HE SNORES
476
00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:47,920
DOOR OPENS
477
00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:50,840
Thank you for walking me home.
478
00:22:50,840 --> 00:22:52,920
And thank you.
479
00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:57,960
It really was the merriest party
this house has seen in centuries.
480
00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:00,200
I shall bid you goodnight, then.
481
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:01,880
Thomas?
482
00:23:01,880 --> 00:23:03,080
Yes?
483
00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:05,760
If I was 400 years older...
484
00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:08,240
..and you were alive...
485
00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:11,120
..and we were the same age,
and if I wasn't,
486
00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:14,040
you know, with Mike, then...
487
00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:16,320
..you and me might have...
488
00:23:19,640 --> 00:23:21,880
Night.
489
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:23,440
Ah...!
490
00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:31,520
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, Thomas, I didn't mean to...
491
00:23:31,520 --> 00:23:33,200
I was very drunk, and...
492
00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:36,200
SNORING
493
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:37,640
Dante!
494
00:23:41,440 --> 00:23:44,120
Oh, God.
495
00:23:44,120 --> 00:23:47,880
Can we please get back
to the business in hand?
496
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:49,920
You're not very good
at this, are you?
497
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:52,760
Excuse me. I'm not about
to take diplomacy lessons from
498
00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:55,960
a diseased, unwashed...you know.
499
00:23:55,960 --> 00:23:58,480
I beg your pardon? Sorry, what's
that supposed to mean, "unwashed"?
500
00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:00,200
I had a bath every year.
501
00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:02,160
Well...you smell!
502
00:24:02,160 --> 00:24:03,760
There, I said it.
503
00:24:03,760 --> 00:24:05,360
That's a nasty thing to say.
504
00:24:05,360 --> 00:24:07,040
Not just him. Yeah, you all do.
505
00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:09,680
How dare you?! What are
you saying? I mean...
506
00:24:09,680 --> 00:24:12,920
Hang on, you can't take it
back now! Yeah, take that back.
507
00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:15,560
No, I don't want to take it back.
I mean it! You smell!
508
00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:18,800
You smell of dung, of caca,
of poo-poo. Manure!
509
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:21,280
Yes! I don't know how
I thought this could work.
510
00:24:21,280 --> 00:24:23,000
None of you have got any respect.
511
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:25,080
You know, that's the problem
with the common man -
512
00:24:25,080 --> 00:24:28,960
he doesn't know when to shut up
and listen to the voice of reason.
513
00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:39,840
Oh, God, this is...
Oh, God, it's really horrible.
514
00:24:39,840 --> 00:24:42,240
Just stuff its head back into
shape and pop its eye back in.
515
00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:43,640
Yes, I know, but...
516
00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:46,240
Maybe use some tissues or
something. Yes, but how do I...?
517
00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:48,400
Underneath the tail. Bum. Bum.
518
00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:49,920
She's coming!
519
00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:52,640
Quick, quick, quick. Stop, stop.
520
00:24:52,640 --> 00:24:55,080
FAINT VOICES
521
00:24:55,080 --> 00:24:57,320
Deeper, deeper, deeper, deeper!
522
00:24:59,880 --> 00:25:01,560
Oh, God.
523
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:04,080
FAINT VOICES
524
00:25:04,080 --> 00:25:06,880
Shh, shh. Oh, God, he's still wet.
525
00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:08,920
Stick him by the fire,
he'll soon dry out.
526
00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:10,600
Make haste!
527
00:25:13,120 --> 00:25:14,880
Yeah, no, yeah, no.
528
00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:16,480
Yeah, no...
529
00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:19,040
Oh! Nice to see you.
Oh, hello, you!
530
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:21,840
Hello, Fanny.
How are you doing?
531
00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:31,160
What's Dante doing there?
532
00:25:31,160 --> 00:25:34,080
Well, I was just tidying
up and I thought
533
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:36,960
that we should try
him in a new spot.
534
00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:53,640
Yes, he's nice there.
535
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,360
He used to like sitting by the fire.
536
00:25:56,360 --> 00:25:58,880
ALL LAUGH NERVOUSLY
537
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:07,440
INSECTS BUZZING
538
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:07,440
Uggggh.
539
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:09,920
Oh, yeah, that'll be
the pigeons, mate.
540
00:26:09,920 --> 00:26:12,200
Amazing how much they produce.
541
00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:18,920
SHE SIGHS
542
00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:20,680
We did it.
543
00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:26,160
Well, I did it.
544
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:28,800
Well, it was difficult,
but my careful diplomacy
545
00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:30,680
led them to a full reconciliation.
546
00:26:30,680 --> 00:26:32,440
I'm not staying up here with him.
547
00:26:32,440 --> 00:26:35,160
I'd rather live with Mick,
and he killed my whole family.
548
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:37,960
I am sorry. That's all right, Mick.
549
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:40,720
They were lovely...
Yeah, to die for.
550
00:26:40,720 --> 00:26:43,320
I suppose... You know,
people say things...
551
00:26:43,320 --> 00:26:45,480
..sometimes you get carried
away... ..they don't mean.
552
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:47,920
..and I really didn't mean to,
and... Well, all I want to say is
553
00:26:47,920 --> 00:26:50,880
I'm sorry... ..I'd like to forget...
..good to have you back. Thank you.
554
00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:57,560
We cool?
555
00:26:57,560 --> 00:26:59,400
Yeah, we be cool.
556
00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:02,200
OK.
557
00:27:08,320 --> 00:27:11,600
Mike, where are you?! She's here!
558
00:27:18,360 --> 00:27:20,880
Oh, God.
559
00:27:18,360 --> 00:27:20,880
KNOCK AT DOOR
560
00:27:20,880 --> 00:27:22,560
OK, everyone, shh!
561
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:26,560
BREATHES IN DEEPLY
562
00:27:26,560 --> 00:27:28,680
BREATHES OUT
563
00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:30,600
Welcome to Button House...
564
00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:32,320
CLATTERING
565
00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:36,280
SHE GASPS
566
00:27:37,360 --> 00:27:39,600
HE YELLS
567
00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:41,160
Ow!
568
00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:43,440
Urghhhhh!
569
00:27:43,440 --> 00:27:44,480
SHE RETCHES