[electricity crackling]
[theme music playing]
[enthralling instrumental music playing]
Well, I just withdrew my entire life's savings from the bank.
I don't have two nickels to rub together!
Now how will Daffy and I make this month's rent?
[screams]
What gives?
Dazzling Duck Beauty Contest?
$50 grand prize!
Why, I know a dazzling duck.
Dazzling duck!
-Wrong apartment. -No, no.
There's a beauty compet-- A good-looking duck contest!
And, when you win the $50 grand prize we can pay our rent!
Pass.
First we'll pay the rent, and then--
Oh! And merciful heavens, Daffy! You're an Abomination!
Balderdash!
Daffy, if you're going to win this contest,
then you're gonna have to take a bath.
No way, Jose! I got trauma, don't chya know?
Why, it was years ago, when I was but a young duckling,
A bath beat me up and stole my lunch money.
No! no! You can't do this to me!
Ducks are afraid of water!
Now, Daffy, we need that $50.
[water splashes]
Doesn't that feel better?
A dummy!
Takes one to know one, fatso!
[whooping]
You're getting clean one way or another!
[whooping]
-Ow! -[whooping]
Now I've got you cornered.
No! No!
You don't have to do this!
Yes, yes I do!
[whooping]
Now, you come out of there, you dirty bird!
♪ Kiss me my little cannoliii♪
♪ By the mooonliiiight ♪
-[gasps] -Hmm?
Hey buster, a little privacy if you wouldn't mind!
Jeez, what a weirdo!
All right, where is that duck?
I'm right here, ya dope!
Here lookin' at you, kid!
[humming]
Oh, I'm gonna get you.
Missed me!
Missed me again! [whooping]
[laughing maniacally]
Alrighty, that does it!
Gee, that's a tough break there, buddy.
[humming]
There ya go, ol' pal.
[scatting]
Oh, my goodness, little fella.
What are you doing in here all... by...your... self?
[chomping]
[cheerful humming] Won't be long now...
[chomping continues]
Now I've got you right where. Come to papa!
[sniffles] Guess I... I guess there's only one thing left to do.
All right, let's have a look at you.
Yes yes, fine plumage, very good,
Mmm-hmm, excellent posture.
Great Scott!
Forgive me ladies and gentlemen, but is this some kind of joke?
This pageant is over!
Because we have such an obvious winner!
There you are, son.
Thank you very much!
Congratulations to this year's Dazzling Duck!
I just knew you could do it, pal!
[humming] ♪ Do, da, do, da, roo, da, da♪
♪ Roo, da, do, da♪
♪ Do, do, do, da, do, da, de♪
♪ Oh, da, do, da, de♪
♪ Dum, dum, do, da do, da, da♪
♪ Do, da, do, da♪
♪ Da, da, do, da, da♪
♪ Oh, da, do, da, de ♪
[growling]
[barking]
Ah, shaddap!
Well, you're all bark and no bite, boy.
Maybe you're just not cut out
for this guarding the henhouse business.
Might be time to try something else.
Find a new calling. Vocation that is.
Well, I say, what ya got there?
Painting a picture, huh?
That's good, boy.
Better put your efforts into something more artistic,
I say with a little bit more perseverance,
you might become a regular Hieronymus Bosch.
Hey! Lemme see!
What, I say, what do we have here? Huh?
Oh,
what is this modern art junk?
I don't get it.
Is it supposed to be representative of something?
Well, speak up, boy.
I say, let's call this whole-thing off.
[groans]
[theme music playing]
[whirring, clanging]
Eureka!
My creation is complete!
[laughs whimsically]
Oh, I'm such an evil genius.
I bet you think this is a "free money" tunnel, don't you?
Boy, are you wrong!
It's a fried rabbit sandwich making machine...
In disguise.
[crunching and chewing]
Eh...
What you got there, Doc?
Oh, hello, Mr. Wabbit.
This is a money tunnel.
You simply walk through it,
and at the very end
there is a big pile of money waiting for you.
No kidding?
No kidding.
Go on, give it a try.
[laughing maniacally]
Gee, thanks, Doc.
You know, you have a really big heart.
And after I eat you,
I'll have a really big stomach, too.
[buzzing]
Let the process begin.
-[dings] -Oh, the plucking. The plucking!
Goodbye, mangy wabbit fur.
-[dings] -Oh, "Tenderize."
Not so tough anymore, are ya, wabbit?
-[dings] -Let the good times "Roll."
-[dings] -And basting and roasting.
-And mayonnaising. -[buzzing]
[creepy voice] Because everyone loves mayonnaise.
Everyone.
And finally...
-[dings] -Oh, he's frying.
He's frying!
Oh, boy. Time to feast on crispy wabbit flesh!
[dings and buzzing]
Wow-wee, Doc.
I'm gonna buy me a carrot farm.
You better get in there, Doc!
Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope.
I am not gonna fall for that old twick.
Gimme that cash!
[screams]
-[dings] -Wait a second.
Hey! [laughs]
[dings]
[groaning]
[dings]
Where's the cash...
[dings]
[screaming]
-[dings] -[continues screaming]
So, uh, listen, Doc, I was wondering...
[dings and buzzing]
-[sizzling] -Hang on a second.
Is that mayonnaise?
Everyone loves mayonnaise!
Whoa!
[spits and gags]
Yuck! Taste like failure.
[Elmer] Oh, well, back at the drawing board.
[theme music playing]
Well, time to put the cat out.
[grunts] Come on, Sylvester, you know the drill.
Cats out at six-forty... Six-forty... Quarter to seven!
[thudding]
Why you--
[blows raspberry]
[stammering]
[screams] Sylvester!