1 00:00:01,500 --> 00:00:03,630 [bright tone] 2 00:00:06,458 --> 00:00:09,288 ♪ hip-hop music ♪ 3 00:00:09,375 --> 00:00:10,705 ♪ Yeah, baby, thicken it up ♪ 4 00:00:10,792 --> 00:00:13,752 ♪ We can take it real slow, we can quicken it up ♪ 5 00:00:13,834 --> 00:00:14,424 ♪ I wanna witness you spinning your shit ♪ 6 00:00:14,500 --> 00:00:16,540 ♪ And picking it up ♪ 7 00:00:16,625 --> 00:00:17,995 ♪ Take you to that special place ♪ 8 00:00:18,083 --> 00:00:18,883 ♪ And we can figure it out ♪ 9 00:00:18,959 --> 00:00:20,539 Have we got crumpets? 10 00:00:20,625 --> 00:00:21,455 - Yes, just doing them. - Yes, yes, yes, yes. 11 00:00:21,542 --> 00:00:24,172 I've been sent a thing from production, 12 00:00:24,250 --> 00:00:26,580 getting feedback from, like, a focus group. 13 00:00:26,667 --> 00:00:27,627 Is it good feedback? 14 00:00:27,709 --> 00:00:28,789 Well, let me see. 15 00:00:28,875 --> 00:00:29,915 [man] Hey, everybody. 16 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:32,210 Thanks for coming to help us with this focus group. 17 00:00:32,291 --> 00:00:34,541 What you just saw was some footage 18 00:00:34,625 --> 00:00:36,665 from an upcoming documentary series. 19 00:00:36,750 --> 00:00:37,670 What do you think, ladies? 20 00:00:37,750 --> 00:00:40,330 Having an accent is-is kind of different 21 00:00:40,417 --> 00:00:41,497 from all the other comedians that you see. 22 00:00:41,583 --> 00:00:44,043 [man] It's like a charming British accent, 23 00:00:44,125 --> 00:00:45,665 so it makes you, like, just laugh. 24 00:00:45,750 --> 00:00:47,040 - I'm like, all right. - Yeah, I liked him. 25 00:00:47,125 --> 00:00:48,535 - That's really good. - See? 26 00:00:48,625 --> 00:00:49,625 [man] How would you describe his mom? 27 00:00:49,709 --> 00:00:52,169 [woman] She's more natural, down-to-earth. 28 00:00:52,250 --> 00:00:53,210 I don't know if they gave us enough of her. 29 00:00:53,250 --> 00:00:55,580 [Leesa] They're talking about you. 30 00:00:55,667 --> 00:00:57,537 She's just as funny as he is. 31 00:00:57,625 --> 00:00:59,415 - [Theo] Did you hear that? - Mm-hmm. 32 00:00:59,500 --> 00:01:01,210 [Theo] "She's as funny as he is." 33 00:01:01,291 --> 00:01:03,541 The way he talked to his mom bothered me. 34 00:01:03,625 --> 00:01:06,955 I see him being like a-- kind of like a jerk to her. 35 00:01:07,041 --> 00:01:08,791 I thought he was really disrespectful to his mom. 36 00:01:08,875 --> 00:01:10,575 He's just kind of being a jerk. 37 00:01:10,667 --> 00:01:13,787 I've-I've been called a jerk about six times in this so far. 38 00:01:13,875 --> 00:01:15,745 [man] What about him and his wife? 39 00:01:15,834 --> 00:01:17,254 - He was kind of a jerk. - [man] He's what? 40 00:01:17,333 --> 00:01:18,583 I said he's kind of a jerk. 41 00:01:18,667 --> 00:01:19,577 That's twice just from that. 42 00:01:19,667 --> 00:01:21,877 If my husband talked to me that way, 43 00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:23,419 we would not be together right now. 44 00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:25,250 Surprised you got a husband. 45 00:01:25,333 --> 00:01:27,173 [woman] Give us a redeeming quality. 46 00:01:27,250 --> 00:01:28,880 Ooh. 47 00:01:28,959 --> 00:01:30,789 We're in trouble. 48 00:01:30,875 --> 00:01:32,245 Uh, the feedback 49 00:01:32,333 --> 00:01:35,043 has not been great, I don't think. 50 00:01:35,125 --> 00:01:36,415 - Why is this guy interesting? - I don't have an answer. 51 00:01:36,500 --> 00:01:38,380 I don't think he is interesting, 52 00:01:38,458 --> 00:01:40,208 and I-I wouldn't watch it. 53 00:01:40,291 --> 00:01:41,251 [man] I don't know, just-he's just boring. 54 00:01:41,333 --> 00:01:43,173 [man] So he's boring to us? 55 00:01:43,250 --> 00:01:44,750 Why would I watch him yell at his wife 56 00:01:44,834 --> 00:01:46,044 'cause she's trying to help him do this? 57 00:01:46,125 --> 00:01:47,285 I won't. I could care less. 58 00:01:47,375 --> 00:01:49,745 And that's why he's boring to us. 59 00:01:49,834 --> 00:01:51,214 [Romesh] It's a form of torture. 60 00:01:51,291 --> 00:01:52,671 It's like a modern form of media, 61 00:01:52,750 --> 00:01:54,330 entertainment industry torture. 62 00:01:54,417 --> 00:01:56,497 [Ben] Well, the production just thought 63 00:01:56,583 --> 00:01:58,253 it'd be good for you to get some feedback on the show. 64 00:01:58,333 --> 00:02:01,253 [Romesh] This show is me, 65 00:02:01,333 --> 00:02:02,713 so when they say... 66 00:02:02,792 --> 00:02:03,882 when you get your feedback, 67 00:02:03,959 --> 00:02:07,129 that feedback is, "You need to improve as a human." 68 00:02:07,166 --> 00:02:08,786 The thing I don't get, 69 00:02:08,875 --> 00:02:11,875 like, "grumpy, miserable jerk," actually, I get. 70 00:02:11,959 --> 00:02:14,079 "Boring"? Am I boring? 71 00:02:16,959 --> 00:02:18,419 Um... 72 00:02:18,500 --> 00:02:22,750 Rom, not a word mentioned about me, mate. 73 00:02:22,834 --> 00:02:24,294 I think I'm not in the fucking show. 74 00:02:24,375 --> 00:02:25,875 They didn't mention a thing about me. 75 00:02:25,959 --> 00:02:27,249 Sorry, are you here to be in a show, 76 00:02:27,333 --> 00:02:28,833 or are you here to help me out? 77 00:02:28,917 --> 00:02:29,997 Because your motivations seem all over the place. 78 00:02:30,083 --> 00:02:31,633 Forget about it, man. 79 00:02:31,709 --> 00:02:33,379 - What's up with you? - I think this stinks. 80 00:02:33,458 --> 00:02:34,788 [Romesh] Do you know what I can't believe? 81 00:02:34,875 --> 00:02:35,875 - I've been slagged off. - Yeah. 82 00:02:35,959 --> 00:02:38,459 I've been told that I'm out of order to my mum. 83 00:02:38,542 --> 00:02:40,292 I've been told I'm a jerk to my wife. 84 00:02:40,375 --> 00:02:42,245 They've got no interest in watching the thing. 85 00:02:42,333 --> 00:02:43,583 And I'm thinking, Oh, I wonder what he's gonna say 86 00:02:43,667 --> 00:02:45,207 to soothe my conscience. 87 00:02:45,291 --> 00:02:47,461 "I wasn't mentioned, mate." It's not about you, Rags. 88 00:02:47,542 --> 00:02:51,082 Rom, I just wanted some feedback, man, okay? 89 00:02:51,166 --> 00:02:54,576 Maybe lose the topknot, yeah? 90 00:02:54,667 --> 00:02:57,627 You could also lose some diva attitude as well. 91 00:02:57,709 --> 00:02:59,329 [laughter] 92 00:02:59,417 --> 00:03:02,457 All right, yeah, so you're all gonna gang up now and... 93 00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:04,630 [laughter] 94 00:03:04,667 --> 00:03:07,707 ♪ piano arpeggios ♪ 95 00:03:07,792 --> 00:03:12,382 ♪♪♪ 96 00:03:12,458 --> 00:03:14,288 ♪ playful music ♪ 97 00:03:14,375 --> 00:03:16,915 [Ben] Rom, um, how's it going? 98 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:19,330 Um, yeah, good. 99 00:03:19,417 --> 00:03:22,207 I'm, uh, searching my name on Twitter 100 00:03:22,291 --> 00:03:25,081 to desperately find positive comments about myself. 101 00:03:25,166 --> 00:03:26,456 It's a bit sad, but I can't tell you 102 00:03:26,542 --> 00:03:28,042 it's the first time I've done it. 103 00:03:28,125 --> 00:03:28,995 - Hello, Mum. - Oh. 104 00:03:29,083 --> 00:03:32,543 Um, I've got a little surprise for you. 105 00:03:32,625 --> 00:03:34,785 [Ben] So the production have actually pulled a few strings, 106 00:03:34,875 --> 00:03:37,075 and they know that you and your mum's favorite film 107 00:03:37,166 --> 00:03:37,916 is Coming to America. 108 00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:38,960 Mm. 109 00:03:39,041 --> 00:03:41,751 [Ben] And they have got you a meeting with-- 110 00:03:41,834 --> 00:03:43,044 Eddie Murphy? 111 00:03:43,125 --> 00:03:44,205 [Ben] Uh, Arsenio Hall. 112 00:03:44,291 --> 00:03:46,211 That's great. 113 00:03:46,291 --> 00:03:48,081 Hold on, why have they sorted out a meeting 114 00:03:48,166 --> 00:03:49,206 with Arsenio Hall? 115 00:03:49,291 --> 00:03:50,171 You're joking, eh? 116 00:03:50,250 --> 00:03:51,710 No, we're meeting him today. 117 00:03:51,792 --> 00:03:52,382 - We're gonna go-- - Are we? 118 00:03:52,458 --> 00:03:54,458 - Yeah. - Oh, my God. 119 00:03:54,542 --> 00:03:55,632 Sorry, I thought this show was just 120 00:03:55,709 --> 00:03:57,169 documenting what we're doing. 121 00:03:57,250 --> 00:03:58,710 I didn't realize it was like Make-A-Wish. 122 00:03:58,792 --> 00:04:01,712 Why are we suddenly being delivered this thing? 123 00:04:01,792 --> 00:04:05,212 [Ben] Well, I think-I think, you-you know, they, uh... 124 00:04:05,291 --> 00:04:06,501 - I'm so excited. - Are you? 125 00:04:06,583 --> 00:04:07,883 Honest to God, Rom. Yes, yes, yes. 126 00:04:07,959 --> 00:04:09,289 - Are you? - I like these things. 127 00:04:09,375 --> 00:04:10,785 - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah. 128 00:04:10,875 --> 00:04:12,825 If I could meet Oprah as well, I would love it. 129 00:04:12,917 --> 00:04:14,917 Yeah, sure, I think she's gonna give us a lift there. 130 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:16,580 - Yeah? - Yeah, no. 131 00:04:16,667 --> 00:04:18,917 - All right, no? - No. 132 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:19,920 [Ben] Also, you're going wine tasting. 133 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:22,210 I mean... 134 00:04:22,291 --> 00:04:25,041 ♪ upbeat electronic music ♪ 135 00:04:25,125 --> 00:04:27,875 ♪♪♪ 136 00:04:27,959 --> 00:04:29,579 [Romesh] Are you gonna get drunk? 137 00:04:29,667 --> 00:04:31,827 No, I'll try my best not to get drunk. 138 00:04:31,917 --> 00:04:33,077 - How about that? - Okay. 139 00:04:33,166 --> 00:04:36,576 Oh, this is him, this is him, this is him, this is him. 140 00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:37,787 Holy shit. 141 00:04:37,875 --> 00:04:40,825 Eh-hey. [chuckles] 142 00:04:40,917 --> 00:04:42,247 - [Shanthi] Hello. - Hi. 143 00:04:42,333 --> 00:04:43,753 - Shanthi. - Yes. 144 00:04:43,834 --> 00:04:45,294 Oh, gosh, God bless you. 145 00:04:45,375 --> 00:04:46,125 Oh, you don't know how happy I am 146 00:04:46,208 --> 00:04:48,458 to see you, my God. 147 00:04:48,542 --> 00:04:50,292 Am I saying your name right? Shanthi? 148 00:04:50,375 --> 00:04:51,575 Yes, you have. 149 00:04:51,667 --> 00:04:53,127 Such a pleasure to meet you, man. 150 00:04:53,208 --> 00:04:54,958 Does he get his sense of humor from you? 151 00:04:55,041 --> 00:04:56,041 - You're gonna tell me... - Oh, okay. 152 00:04:56,125 --> 00:04:59,625 ...after talking to me, and you can judge that. 153 00:04:59,709 --> 00:05:00,419 I'm looking forward to today. 154 00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:03,130 [Romesh] But I'm not an idiot. 155 00:05:03,208 --> 00:05:04,788 This has been set up to the direct results 156 00:05:04,875 --> 00:05:06,245 of that focus group. 157 00:05:06,333 --> 00:05:08,753 You didn't even have the forethought 158 00:05:08,834 --> 00:05:09,634 to put some distance between it. 159 00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:12,749 We're literally... this is happening. 160 00:05:12,792 --> 00:05:14,582 ♪ lounge music ♪ 161 00:05:14,667 --> 00:05:16,577 [Arsenio] So, Shanthi, what do you do? 162 00:05:16,709 --> 00:05:18,129 I work for the post office. 163 00:05:18,208 --> 00:05:20,378 I've been working there for 25 years. 164 00:05:20,458 --> 00:05:23,168 When my son become millionaire, I can... 165 00:05:23,250 --> 00:05:24,750 That's her long-term financial plan. 166 00:05:24,834 --> 00:05:27,754 It's the best feeling in the world when you call your mom 167 00:05:27,834 --> 00:05:30,134 and say, "You don't have to work again." 168 00:05:30,208 --> 00:05:32,538 And your mama start cussing people out at the job. 169 00:05:32,625 --> 00:05:34,535 "What? You want me to do what? I ain't doing shit. 170 00:05:34,625 --> 00:05:38,665 'Cause Romi's a millionaire, motherfucker." 171 00:05:38,750 --> 00:05:40,170 I might do that. 172 00:05:40,250 --> 00:05:42,750 [laughter] 173 00:05:42,834 --> 00:05:46,134 [Arsenio] Wow, that one has an ass like Amber Rose, 174 00:05:46,208 --> 00:05:47,248 that one right there, that... 175 00:05:47,333 --> 00:05:48,173 ...all white and muscular. 176 00:05:48,250 --> 00:05:52,250 [laughter] 177 00:05:52,333 --> 00:05:53,543 [Shanthi] Oh, isn't it beautiful? 178 00:05:53,625 --> 00:05:55,285 [Arsenio] That doesn't even look real. 179 00:05:55,375 --> 00:05:56,745 I mean, if somebody painted it, 180 00:05:56,834 --> 00:05:59,794 you would say, "Ah, no clouds look like that." 181 00:05:59,875 --> 00:06:00,455 Gorgeous. 182 00:06:00,542 --> 00:06:01,542 [Shanthi] I love red wine. 183 00:06:01,625 --> 00:06:05,285 I think wine purists drink red. 184 00:06:05,375 --> 00:06:06,625 Right, yeah, sure. 185 00:06:06,709 --> 00:06:08,209 When you meet a wine expert, 186 00:06:08,291 --> 00:06:10,881 or someone who really, really knows wine, 187 00:06:10,959 --> 00:06:12,459 they don't want white. 188 00:06:12,542 --> 00:06:14,252 Yeah, red is the one. 189 00:06:14,333 --> 00:06:16,083 - Let's toast to the one. - Yes, one. 190 00:06:16,166 --> 00:06:18,206 [Arsenio] Yes. 191 00:06:18,291 --> 00:06:19,711 So how's it going with, uh... 192 00:06:19,792 --> 00:06:22,082 what-where is Coming to America 2 at? 193 00:06:22,166 --> 00:06:24,626 I'm hoping that the second draft 194 00:06:24,709 --> 00:06:28,079 will be finished by Christmas, maybe? 195 00:06:28,166 --> 00:06:29,576 So do you have, like- like, for example, 196 00:06:29,667 --> 00:06:31,497 will they come to you for this, 197 00:06:31,583 --> 00:06:33,883 for the sequel for casting decisions and stuff like that? 198 00:06:33,959 --> 00:06:35,459 Wh-why? 199 00:06:35,542 --> 00:06:36,382 It would be amazing to get, like, a tiny... 200 00:06:36,458 --> 00:06:38,078 do you know what I mean? 201 00:06:38,166 --> 00:06:41,286 It-it-it's too early to talk to me about casting 202 00:06:41,375 --> 00:06:42,375 for Coming to America. 203 00:06:42,458 --> 00:06:44,878 It's-it's too early. 204 00:06:44,959 --> 00:06:46,419 Yeah, no, I get it. Sorry, I'm sorry. 205 00:06:46,500 --> 00:06:47,830 [Arsenio] Mom, does that make sense? 206 00:06:47,917 --> 00:06:49,037 - It does, it does. - Yeah, I know, I know. 207 00:06:49,125 --> 00:06:51,165 But I'm just saying, if it came up, do you know what I mean? 208 00:06:51,250 --> 00:06:52,880 Let's give it some time. 209 00:06:52,959 --> 00:06:53,749 ♪♪♪ 210 00:06:53,834 --> 00:06:56,334 [Arsenio] Boy. Are you loving this? 211 00:06:56,417 --> 00:06:57,747 [Shanthi] I love this, yes. 212 00:06:57,834 --> 00:06:58,674 You've stopped dating, right? 213 00:06:58,750 --> 00:07:03,000 I haven't had date for five years now. 214 00:07:03,083 --> 00:07:05,793 Do you still, um-do you still go up and stuff, like... 215 00:07:05,875 --> 00:07:07,995 Oh, yeah, as a matter of fact, I started doing stand-up again. 216 00:07:08,083 --> 00:07:09,173 I had stopped doing stand-up for a while, 217 00:07:09,250 --> 00:07:10,920 and now I'm doing it again. 218 00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:12,540 I was trying-I'm trying to get up as much as I can over here, 219 00:07:12,625 --> 00:07:14,785 do you know what I mean, but in the UK, 220 00:07:14,875 --> 00:07:16,495 I can get gigs, like, easy, 221 00:07:16,583 --> 00:07:18,213 and then over here it's been a bit of an adjustment 222 00:07:18,291 --> 00:07:20,961 because... 223 00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:22,581 ...like, a lot of these places won't let me go. 224 00:07:22,667 --> 00:07:25,707 Like, I went to The Comedy Store... 225 00:07:25,792 --> 00:07:27,752 ...and tried to sort of get some time, 226 00:07:27,792 --> 00:07:29,752 and they said they need someone to vouch for me, 227 00:07:29,792 --> 00:07:30,292 like, just someone to put in a good word, 228 00:07:30,375 --> 00:07:32,205 do you know what I mean? 229 00:07:32,250 --> 00:07:33,750 Yeah, yeah. 230 00:07:33,834 --> 00:07:36,294 Like, maybe, let's talk about it later? 231 00:07:37,208 --> 00:07:38,498 Yeah, sure. 232 00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:41,923 - Yeah, sure. - [Arsenio] Great. 233 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:44,540 I couldn't believe when they told me you were 234 00:07:44,625 --> 00:07:46,075 a Coming to America fan. 235 00:07:46,166 --> 00:07:47,416 [laughter] 236 00:07:47,500 --> 00:07:48,790 I'm gonna go for a cigarette or something. 237 00:07:48,875 --> 00:07:50,375 - [Arsenio] You smoke? - Yeah. 238 00:07:50,458 --> 00:07:51,418 [Shanthi] That's no good. 239 00:07:51,500 --> 00:07:54,290 Even Mom knows that, man. 240 00:07:54,375 --> 00:07:57,455 [birds cawing distantly] 241 00:07:58,166 --> 00:08:00,376 I'll see you guys in a bit. 242 00:08:00,458 --> 00:08:02,288 [sneakers squeaking] 243 00:08:02,375 --> 00:08:03,785 His shoes are squeaking. 244 00:08:03,875 --> 00:08:05,455 - [laughs] - Did you hear his shoe? 245 00:08:05,542 --> 00:08:06,422 When he walked away, his shoes went... 246 00:08:06,500 --> 00:08:09,540 [imitating squeaking] 247 00:08:09,625 --> 00:08:11,455 Maybe he's not wearing socks. 248 00:08:11,542 --> 00:08:13,132 ♪♪♪ 249 00:08:13,208 --> 00:08:13,668 [Arsenio] This wine is too good. 250 00:08:13,750 --> 00:08:15,790 Too good. [laughs] 251 00:08:15,875 --> 00:08:17,075 He's gone now. I'ma use his chair. 252 00:08:17,166 --> 00:08:20,206 Could've been like this, me and you, all day, right? 253 00:08:20,291 --> 00:08:22,131 - All day, of course. - Yes, yes, yes. 254 00:08:22,208 --> 00:08:22,918 [Ben] Would you say that Arsenio 255 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:25,540 was flirting with your mum? 256 00:08:25,625 --> 00:08:28,875 I think, had I not been there, 257 00:08:28,959 --> 00:08:31,129 they would've finished one of the bottles of red 258 00:08:31,208 --> 00:08:32,628 and just had it on the table. 259 00:08:32,709 --> 00:08:34,999 [both] Mmm. 260 00:08:35,083 --> 00:08:36,633 What are we doing tomorrow? What have you got planned? 261 00:08:36,709 --> 00:08:38,629 Are we going ice-skating with Julia Roberts? 262 00:08:38,709 --> 00:08:39,669 Pottery with Kevin Hart? 263 00:08:39,750 --> 00:08:42,710 Tomorrow, I'm doing my thing. 264 00:08:42,792 --> 00:08:44,382 I don't want any rocking up 265 00:08:44,458 --> 00:08:46,168 and saying, "Oh, just to let you know, 266 00:08:46,250 --> 00:08:48,460 we decided to-to send you on an intensive Latin course 267 00:08:48,542 --> 00:08:49,832 with Peter Dinklage. 268 00:08:49,917 --> 00:08:52,667 [Ben] Hey, Rom, can I just grab a quick, uh, 269 00:08:52,750 --> 00:08:54,670 word with both of you? 270 00:08:55,875 --> 00:08:59,825 Sha-uh-Shanthi, how was-you-just... 271 00:09:01,709 --> 00:09:02,579 - How was-- - [laughs] 272 00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:05,207 Uh, how was-how was that for you? 273 00:09:05,291 --> 00:09:07,831 Oh, I really enjoyed his company. 274 00:09:07,917 --> 00:09:09,827 - And, um-- - What are you doing? 275 00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:11,667 What is this? 276 00:09:11,750 --> 00:09:12,920 [Ben] Well, it's just-it's just this was Shanthi's-- 277 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:16,080 So she's doing a fucking face-the-camera now? 278 00:09:16,166 --> 00:09:19,496 [Ben] Any thoughts about your experience, about the day? 279 00:09:19,583 --> 00:09:20,923 When I met him, 280 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:23,080 I found him very funny. 281 00:09:23,166 --> 00:09:23,746 Very funny. 282 00:09:23,834 --> 00:09:26,464 And I-I enjoyed his company. 283 00:09:26,542 --> 00:09:28,172 So I thought, uh, yeah. 284 00:09:28,250 --> 00:09:32,040 This is one of the worst fucking things I've ever seen. 285 00:09:32,125 --> 00:09:34,495 - Shall we just go, please? - Okay. 286 00:09:37,333 --> 00:09:40,633 Did Arsenio get his dick out? 287 00:09:40,709 --> 00:09:42,329 I feel like slapping you, honest to God. 288 00:09:42,417 --> 00:09:44,127 [chuckles] 289 00:09:46,667 --> 00:09:49,537 ♪ hip-hop music ♪ 290 00:09:49,625 --> 00:09:51,035 ♪♪♪ 291 00:09:51,125 --> 00:09:54,035 ♪ I bet you've never seen a cooler person ♪ 292 00:09:54,125 --> 00:09:55,285 - ♪ It's James Bond ♪ - ♪ Who? ♪ 293 00:09:55,375 --> 00:09:57,205 ♪ The stupid version ♪ 294 00:09:57,291 --> 00:09:59,041 ♪ No good at what he does, so he can't be earning ♪ 295 00:09:59,125 --> 00:10:00,495 ♪ Do you have a day job? ♪ 296 00:10:00,583 --> 00:10:02,833 ♪ What bar do you work in? ♪ 297 00:10:03,875 --> 00:10:05,415 [Romesh] Be honest with me. Be genuine with me. 298 00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:06,500 Do you think I'm interesting? 299 00:10:06,583 --> 00:10:09,543 No, I mean, am I boring? Is what I'm getting at. 300 00:10:09,625 --> 00:10:11,535 Sometimes, yes. 301 00:10:11,625 --> 00:10:13,165 Jesus Christ. 302 00:10:13,250 --> 00:10:17,210 Have you done anything to make it interesting? 303 00:10:17,291 --> 00:10:19,461 Have you done anything? 304 00:10:19,542 --> 00:10:21,712 Other than introducing your mum to this... 305 00:10:21,792 --> 00:10:23,462 what's-his-hall? 306 00:10:23,542 --> 00:10:25,082 - Arsenio. - Arsenio Hall. 307 00:10:25,166 --> 00:10:26,746 What is Arsenio Hall? 308 00:10:26,834 --> 00:10:28,084 - "What is Arsenio Hall"? - "What is Arsenio"-- 309 00:10:28,166 --> 00:10:30,416 Arsenio Hall is this lovely, ornate, 310 00:10:30,500 --> 00:10:31,960 sort of 19th-century hall 311 00:10:32,041 --> 00:10:33,501 in the middle of Los Angeles. 312 00:10:33,583 --> 00:10:36,673 - And you guys went there? - [both] Yeah. 313 00:10:36,750 --> 00:10:38,250 Have you heard of it, Arsenio Hall? 314 00:10:38,333 --> 00:10:40,583 I've heard of it, but why wasn't I invited? 315 00:10:40,667 --> 00:10:42,747 I didn't think it was a type of hall that you'd want to visit. 316 00:10:42,834 --> 00:10:44,254 I didn't think you would like going to halls. 317 00:10:44,333 --> 00:10:45,423 How do you know that I don't like-- 318 00:10:45,500 --> 00:10:46,290 All right, fine. [stammers] 319 00:10:46,375 --> 00:10:47,825 It's still there. 320 00:10:47,917 --> 00:10:49,497 If you want to go see Arsenio Hall, I'll take you. 321 00:10:49,583 --> 00:10:50,713 Mum loved the hall. 322 00:10:50,792 --> 00:10:53,002 I-I did, I-I really... 323 00:10:53,083 --> 00:10:54,713 liked the hall. 324 00:10:54,792 --> 00:10:56,382 Yeah, it felt like Mum really wanted to explore the hall. 325 00:10:56,458 --> 00:10:59,248 [laughs] No. 326 00:10:59,333 --> 00:11:03,583 I thought she was gonna get on top of the hall at one point. 327 00:11:03,667 --> 00:11:06,417 ♪ hip-hop music ♪ 328 00:11:06,500 --> 00:11:08,080 ♪♪♪ 329 00:11:08,208 --> 00:11:10,038 ♪ Long way down from the tenth floor ♪ 330 00:11:10,125 --> 00:11:13,035 ♪ But I couldn't be further from M4 ♪ 331 00:11:13,125 --> 00:11:15,035 ♪ I'm on all fours, head held high up ♪ 332 00:11:15,125 --> 00:11:17,825 ♪ Galloping around town, looking like a centaur ♪ 333 00:11:17,917 --> 00:11:20,577 [Romesh] So while Rags and Mum hang out, 334 00:11:20,667 --> 00:11:21,917 I have organized for Leesa and I 335 00:11:22,041 --> 00:11:23,251 to have a little sort of date day. 336 00:11:23,333 --> 00:11:26,883 [Ben] Obviously, this is a reaction to the focus group 337 00:11:26,959 --> 00:11:30,579 saying you weren't very nice to Leesa. 338 00:11:30,667 --> 00:11:32,537 No. 339 00:11:32,625 --> 00:11:34,245 [Ben] So the focus groups say you should be nicer 340 00:11:34,333 --> 00:11:36,713 to your family and should be more exciting. 341 00:11:36,792 --> 00:11:38,962 The next day, you're on horseback. 342 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:44,750 ♪ exciting music ♪ 343 00:11:44,834 --> 00:11:46,254 [Leesa] I was very surprised 344 00:11:46,333 --> 00:11:48,213 that you wanted to go horse riding. 345 00:11:48,291 --> 00:11:49,921 I didn't know you were into horse riding. 346 00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:51,170 [Romesh] Um, I'm not really. 347 00:11:51,250 --> 00:11:53,630 I just thought it might be something you might be into. 348 00:11:53,709 --> 00:11:55,379 - [Romesh] Obviously not. - [Leesa] No. 349 00:11:55,458 --> 00:11:56,828 - No? - Not really. 350 00:11:56,917 --> 00:11:59,037 I haven't ridden a horse since I was eight. 351 00:11:59,125 --> 00:12:00,245 Just thought this might be something 352 00:12:00,333 --> 00:12:01,173 to do with the focus group. 353 00:12:01,250 --> 00:12:03,500 This is not because of the focus group. 354 00:12:03,583 --> 00:12:05,083 [Leesa] Okay. You just have to take everything 355 00:12:05,166 --> 00:12:06,126 with a pinch of salt and just not worry about it. 356 00:12:06,208 --> 00:12:08,328 [Romesh] Well, it's easier said than done. 357 00:12:08,417 --> 00:12:09,497 They weren't calling you a jerk. 358 00:12:09,583 --> 00:12:10,713 [laughs] 359 00:12:10,792 --> 00:12:12,962 - [Romesh] Ta-da. - [Leesa] Wow. 360 00:12:13,041 --> 00:12:14,921 - Nice, right? - Very romantic. 361 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:15,790 [Romesh] I got healthy crap that you like. 362 00:12:15,875 --> 00:12:18,035 [Leesa] I'm very impressed. 363 00:12:18,125 --> 00:12:20,205 - [Romesh] Huh, yeah? - [Leesa] Yeah. 364 00:12:20,291 --> 00:12:22,921 - Cheers. - Cheers. Thank you. 365 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:26,210 See, if we were living out here permanently, 366 00:12:26,291 --> 00:12:27,501 I'd do this for you every week. 367 00:12:27,583 --> 00:12:29,673 - Could you pass me a knife? - Sure. Certainly, my darling. 368 00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:31,000 And some bread. 369 00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:33,673 Which bread would you like, my honey bun? 370 00:12:33,750 --> 00:12:35,080 Oh, I don't know. 371 00:12:35,166 --> 00:12:35,996 Let me ask you a question. 372 00:12:36,083 --> 00:12:38,543 And I'll believe whatever you say to me. 373 00:12:38,625 --> 00:12:41,575 - Would you live here? - Yeah, what's not to like? 374 00:12:41,667 --> 00:12:43,377 - So you would live here? - Yeah. 375 00:12:43,458 --> 00:12:44,538 But you haven't changed your ticket. 376 00:12:44,625 --> 00:12:47,455 I know, but I need to get the kids back to school. 377 00:12:47,542 --> 00:12:49,542 Catch up, see their friends. 378 00:12:49,625 --> 00:12:52,075 It was always an open return ticket, wasn't it? 379 00:12:52,166 --> 00:12:54,206 It was never... 380 00:12:54,333 --> 00:12:56,383 It's not an open return ticket. It's a return ticket. 381 00:12:56,458 --> 00:12:58,578 [laughs] Okay, well, it's a return ticket. 382 00:12:58,667 --> 00:13:01,167 Do you ever wonder sometimes 383 00:13:01,250 --> 00:13:02,920 if our relationship is completely dependent 384 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:04,540 on us not seeing each other that much, 385 00:13:04,625 --> 00:13:05,875 and if we did spend a lot of time together, 386 00:13:05,959 --> 00:13:08,209 we'd realize that we didn't get on? 387 00:13:08,291 --> 00:13:09,631 Yeah, probably. 388 00:13:09,709 --> 00:13:12,249 - I was joking. - Oh, I wasn't. 389 00:13:12,333 --> 00:13:15,083 - Yes, you were. - [giggles] 390 00:13:15,166 --> 00:13:16,376 Check that out. 391 00:13:16,458 --> 00:13:17,578 ♪ playful music ♪ 392 00:13:17,667 --> 00:13:19,037 It's the Greek. 393 00:13:19,125 --> 00:13:20,535 Any reaction? 394 00:13:20,625 --> 00:13:22,915 Yeah, it's the Greek. I've seen it before. 395 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,710 Words of support? 396 00:13:24,792 --> 00:13:26,882 You're deeply, deeply difficult to impress, 397 00:13:26,959 --> 00:13:28,079 do you know that? 398 00:13:28,166 --> 00:13:30,376 I know. 399 00:13:30,458 --> 00:13:31,958 You're so lucky I settled for you. 400 00:13:32,041 --> 00:13:32,541 [laughs] 401 00:13:32,625 --> 00:13:35,125 What is gonna happen 402 00:13:35,208 --> 00:13:37,128 is I'm gonna smash it for the next few weeks. 403 00:13:37,208 --> 00:13:38,328 - Sell out the Greek... - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 404 00:13:38,417 --> 00:13:40,207 ...then you're gonna hear about me selling out the Greek, 405 00:13:40,291 --> 00:13:43,171 either from a text message from me, or from the news. 406 00:13:43,250 --> 00:13:44,290 You'll be on the news. 407 00:13:44,375 --> 00:13:45,825 And then you'll arrive at LAX, 408 00:13:45,917 --> 00:13:46,877 and then I'll be waiting for you, and you'll go, 409 00:13:46,959 --> 00:13:48,329 "Romesh, I'm sorry I doubted you. 410 00:13:48,417 --> 00:13:50,207 I went back to England 411 00:13:50,291 --> 00:13:51,751 despite the fact that you were on your way 412 00:13:51,834 --> 00:13:52,714 to becoming a huge success in America. 413 00:13:52,792 --> 00:13:54,542 How will you ever forgive me?" 414 00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:56,575 I'll say, "Leesa, I don't know if I can," and then you'll go, 415 00:13:56,667 --> 00:13:58,667 "Romesh, what can I do to make it up to you?" 416 00:13:58,750 --> 00:14:00,630 And then I'll go, "How about a blowie?" 417 00:14:00,709 --> 00:14:01,629 [snickers] Oh, God. 418 00:14:01,709 --> 00:14:03,079 And then you'll go, "Yes." 419 00:14:03,166 --> 00:14:05,076 And then it'd be, like, just fade to black, 420 00:14:05,166 --> 00:14:07,576 as you suck me off. 421 00:14:07,667 --> 00:14:08,747 That's never gonna happen. 422 00:14:08,875 --> 00:14:10,165 [laughs] 423 00:14:12,875 --> 00:14:15,415 ♪ playful music ♪ 424 00:14:15,500 --> 00:14:17,290 [Shanthi] Did you both enjoy your date? 425 00:14:17,375 --> 00:14:19,785 - [Leesa] Yeah, it was good. - [Romesh] It was great. 426 00:14:19,875 --> 00:14:20,955 Tea, anyone? 427 00:14:21,041 --> 00:14:22,171 I'll have an Earl Grey, please. 428 00:14:22,250 --> 00:14:23,330 Earl Grey. 429 00:14:23,417 --> 00:14:24,497 Can I have green tea, please, Leesa? 430 00:14:24,583 --> 00:14:27,923 [Rags] Thanks, Leesa, you're really nice, thank you. 431 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:30,920 What are we doing? Like, we watching some TV or... 432 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,580 Uh, well, I thought you and I could go out, Mum. 433 00:14:32,667 --> 00:14:34,077 Yeah? 434 00:14:34,166 --> 00:14:35,826 Do you know how when we were with Arsenio... 435 00:14:35,917 --> 00:14:37,787 Yes? 436 00:14:37,875 --> 00:14:39,495 ...and you said, "I haven't been on a date for five years." 437 00:14:39,583 --> 00:14:40,383 - That's very true. Yeah. - Yeah. 438 00:14:40,458 --> 00:14:41,628 So what I thought we could do today... 439 00:14:41,709 --> 00:14:43,289 [Shanthi] Mm-hmm? 440 00:14:43,375 --> 00:14:47,125 ...I'm taking you to sort of like a-a cookery 441 00:14:47,208 --> 00:14:48,828 kind of mixer, 442 00:14:48,917 --> 00:14:51,247 which is where you and I are gonna do some cooking. 443 00:14:51,333 --> 00:14:53,003 But there are some gentlemen there, 444 00:14:53,083 --> 00:14:55,213 and you can chat and mingle and stuff like that. 445 00:14:55,291 --> 00:14:56,581 [Shanthi] Oh, yeah. 446 00:14:56,667 --> 00:14:59,667 And if you get on with somebody... 447 00:14:59,750 --> 00:15:01,960 - Yeah? - You can have a bit of dick. 448 00:15:02,041 --> 00:15:03,081 ♪♪♪ 449 00:15:03,166 --> 00:15:05,076 ♪ Take it on the chin ♪ 450 00:15:05,166 --> 00:15:06,536 ♪ Six million ways to shake it and it's grim ♪ 451 00:15:06,625 --> 00:15:08,325 ♪ That's disgusting ♪ 452 00:15:08,417 --> 00:15:10,667 ♪ Got me staying for the dim, baby, I'ma win ♪ 453 00:15:10,750 --> 00:15:12,000 ♪ I'ma cut the cake and get it in, uh ♪ 454 00:15:12,083 --> 00:15:16,463 ♪ Bad man ting, bad man ting ♪ 455 00:15:16,542 --> 00:15:19,132 We're really excited to welcome everybody tonight 456 00:15:19,208 --> 00:15:21,958 to BLVD Kitchen for our cooking class 457 00:15:22,041 --> 00:15:23,791 on foods of love. 458 00:15:23,875 --> 00:15:25,165 So the first thing we're gonna make tonight 459 00:15:25,250 --> 00:15:27,330 is going to be a cocktail with watermelons. 460 00:15:27,417 --> 00:15:29,827 It's been said to actually even mimic Viagra. 461 00:15:29,917 --> 00:15:32,457 So we're gonna start off 462 00:15:32,542 --> 00:15:34,502 with our watermelon cocktail tonight. 463 00:15:34,583 --> 00:15:37,003 [Ben] Are you sort of nervous for your mum? Are you...? 464 00:15:37,083 --> 00:15:38,673 [Romesh] Yes, I am nervous for my mum. 465 00:15:38,750 --> 00:15:40,750 I don't think my mum's ever been on a date. 466 00:15:40,834 --> 00:15:42,674 I mean, she's been on a date with my dad. 467 00:15:42,750 --> 00:15:45,170 But that was after they'd sort of settled down and got married. 468 00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:46,420 So I'm gonna try and encourage her 469 00:15:46,500 --> 00:15:48,330 to sort of talk to people, 470 00:15:48,417 --> 00:15:50,627 which she won't do instinctively. 471 00:15:50,709 --> 00:15:52,709 - How are you? - Good, thank you. 472 00:15:52,792 --> 00:15:54,332 Enjoy your lesson? 473 00:15:54,417 --> 00:15:56,667 Do you come very often here or...? 474 00:15:56,750 --> 00:15:57,960 [Ben] I just want to say, this is great. 475 00:15:58,083 --> 00:15:59,333 You know, the focus group said 476 00:15:59,458 --> 00:16:00,628 you should be nicer to your mum. 477 00:16:00,750 --> 00:16:02,130 You're being nicer to your mum. 478 00:16:02,208 --> 00:16:04,378 Oh, my God. Can you help me? 479 00:16:04,458 --> 00:16:06,248 You got to put it hard, like this. 480 00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:07,923 Ah. 481 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:10,210 I'm not doing this in response to the focus group. 482 00:16:10,291 --> 00:16:11,881 I'm doing this because I want to help my mum out. 483 00:16:11,959 --> 00:16:13,579 [laughs] 484 00:16:13,667 --> 00:16:15,497 Is it an interesting coincidence 485 00:16:15,583 --> 00:16:16,383 that it's off the back of the focus group 486 00:16:16,458 --> 00:16:17,878 saying I'm not nice enough to my mum? 487 00:16:17,959 --> 00:16:19,169 Yes, arguably yes. 488 00:16:19,250 --> 00:16:20,670 Pat, pat, pat, pat, pat, like that. 489 00:16:20,750 --> 00:16:23,130 Don't be afraid. [laughs] 490 00:16:23,208 --> 00:16:25,498 [chef] You know, I get the cherries out... 491 00:16:25,583 --> 00:16:26,213 [man] I like to pick my cherries. 492 00:16:26,291 --> 00:16:27,921 - [chef] Ooh. - [laughter] 493 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,330 [chef] It's getting racy in here. 494 00:16:30,417 --> 00:16:32,037 [Shanthi] I'm going to get drunk. 495 00:16:32,125 --> 00:16:35,745 [laughter] 496 00:16:35,834 --> 00:16:37,544 [Ben] Uh, I guess you didn't really need to worry, 497 00:16:37,625 --> 00:16:41,705 because your mum was actually more sociable than you were. 498 00:16:41,792 --> 00:16:44,462 Yes, my mum was a lot more interesting and sociable 499 00:16:44,542 --> 00:16:46,082 and funny than I was, yes. 500 00:16:46,166 --> 00:16:46,626 I have to concede that. 501 00:16:46,709 --> 00:16:48,209 [Shanthi laughs] 502 00:16:48,291 --> 00:16:52,881 That's-that's, uh, namaste. That's namaste. 503 00:16:52,959 --> 00:16:54,629 - How are you doing, Mum? - Doing fine. 504 00:16:54,709 --> 00:16:56,419 I didn't think that I will enjoy so much, 505 00:16:56,500 --> 00:16:58,130 but it's good, good, meeting-- 506 00:16:58,208 --> 00:17:00,038 Isn't it-isn't it mainly Buddhists that say that line? 507 00:17:00,125 --> 00:17:02,575 No, no, there are Hindus, Muslims. 508 00:17:02,667 --> 00:17:06,077 [Ben] I mean, did you have any sort of fun at all? 509 00:17:06,166 --> 00:17:08,206 Um... 510 00:17:08,291 --> 00:17:10,961 Me, Don, and Bob had an interesting conversation 511 00:17:11,041 --> 00:17:12,881 about how, uh, 512 00:17:12,959 --> 00:17:14,829 phones have affected our lives. 513 00:17:14,917 --> 00:17:16,497 What do you use, Rom? 514 00:17:16,583 --> 00:17:18,963 I've got an iPhone as well, 515 00:17:19,041 --> 00:17:20,251 iPhone 6. 516 00:17:20,333 --> 00:17:21,923 [laughter] 517 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,290 Yeah, it's an amazing device. It really is. 518 00:17:24,375 --> 00:17:28,205 It's so nice to meet so many different people. 519 00:17:28,291 --> 00:17:30,541 [Romesh] I went into this week 520 00:17:30,625 --> 00:17:31,495 sort of pissed off about 521 00:17:31,583 --> 00:17:33,673 what the focus group said, and, you know, 522 00:17:33,750 --> 00:17:36,250 them sort of insinuating that I'm boring. 523 00:17:36,333 --> 00:17:37,833 And after this evening, 524 00:17:37,917 --> 00:17:39,327 I actually think they weren't harsh enough. 525 00:17:39,417 --> 00:17:40,377 I am dull as fuck. 526 00:17:47,750 --> 00:17:50,710 ♪ instrumental music ♪ 527 00:17:50,792 --> 00:17:54,462 ♪♪♪ 528 00:17:54,542 --> 00:17:54,962 - [Romesh] All right, Rags? - [Rags] Hi, there. 529 00:17:55,041 --> 00:17:57,081 All right, man. 530 00:17:57,166 --> 00:17:59,416 What's up with you? You seem a bit down. 531 00:17:59,500 --> 00:18:01,960 I mean, like, the focus group thing. 532 00:18:02,041 --> 00:18:03,751 That-that sort of brought me right down, you know, like-- 533 00:18:03,834 --> 00:18:05,134 Look, I'm sorry. 534 00:18:05,208 --> 00:18:07,828 I'm sorry that when I was watching 535 00:18:07,917 --> 00:18:09,577 the focus group, 536 00:18:09,667 --> 00:18:11,627 and they said that I was a jerk, 537 00:18:11,709 --> 00:18:13,249 and that I was out of order to my mum, 538 00:18:13,333 --> 00:18:14,673 I was out of order to Leesa, 539 00:18:14,750 --> 00:18:16,750 I was unlikable, I was not funny, 540 00:18:16,834 --> 00:18:19,134 I was boring, I wasn't interesting. 541 00:18:19,208 --> 00:18:21,378 I'm sorry that when I was watching all of that, 542 00:18:21,458 --> 00:18:23,288 I didn't think to myself, 543 00:18:23,375 --> 00:18:24,915 "Poor Rags, he's not been mentioned." 544 00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,790 You did think that? 545 00:18:26,875 --> 00:18:27,915 No, I'm sorry that I didn't think that. 546 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:29,460 Oh, right, yeah, thanks, man. 547 00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:31,292 For me to be in this show properly, 548 00:18:31,375 --> 00:18:32,785 and then people to notice me, 549 00:18:32,875 --> 00:18:34,285 I think I have to do something good. 550 00:18:34,375 --> 00:18:35,825 Okay, so what I've done, 551 00:18:35,917 --> 00:18:38,957 I've just organized the stand-up comedy lady 552 00:18:39,041 --> 00:18:40,171 that actually teaches everyone to do 553 00:18:40,250 --> 00:18:42,210 stand-up comedy properly in the U.S. 554 00:18:42,291 --> 00:18:44,751 So you want to be a stand-up comedian? 555 00:18:44,834 --> 00:18:45,584 Yeah, I've always wanted to be 556 00:18:45,667 --> 00:18:48,077 in the entertainment industry, but-- 557 00:18:48,166 --> 00:18:49,666 So you've tried to get into the entertainment industry 558 00:18:49,750 --> 00:18:51,170 before, have you? 559 00:18:51,250 --> 00:18:52,880 Well, I formed a band called Unwanted Generation 560 00:18:52,959 --> 00:18:53,879 back in the old days. 561 00:18:53,959 --> 00:18:55,169 Unwanted Generation? 562 00:18:55,250 --> 00:18:58,000 Unwanted Generation, back in Sri Lanka. 563 00:18:58,083 --> 00:19:00,173 You know, we went on shows. 564 00:19:00,250 --> 00:19:01,380 I had the guitar, 565 00:19:01,458 --> 00:19:02,378 but it was not plugged in. 566 00:19:02,458 --> 00:19:05,208 And I used to just walk around doing this. 567 00:19:05,333 --> 00:19:06,503 Why did you do that? 568 00:19:06,583 --> 00:19:07,583 Like, I wanted to be in the band, mate. 569 00:19:07,667 --> 00:19:08,747 That's what I was born to do. 570 00:19:08,834 --> 00:19:09,674 But my parents didn't allow-- 571 00:19:09,750 --> 00:19:11,670 I mean, you can't be born to do it. 572 00:19:11,750 --> 00:19:12,710 You can't be born to be a guitar player. 573 00:19:12,792 --> 00:19:16,712 My parents didn't allow me to learn it, all right? 574 00:19:16,792 --> 00:19:17,752 Will you actually be doing the stand-up yourself? 575 00:19:17,834 --> 00:19:19,884 Or do you want to just stand there and mime 576 00:19:19,959 --> 00:19:21,329 and somebody else does the set for you? 577 00:19:21,417 --> 00:19:25,667 Okay, fine, I will come and support you 578 00:19:25,750 --> 00:19:27,710 on your lifelong dream of becoming a stand-up comedian, 579 00:19:27,792 --> 00:19:31,542 which started two days ago when you watched the focus group. 580 00:19:31,625 --> 00:19:33,285 ♪ hip-hop music ♪ 581 00:19:33,375 --> 00:19:35,705 [Romesh] Rags has lived his whole life 582 00:19:35,792 --> 00:19:36,922 believing that he should be famous. 583 00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:38,580 Stand-up comedy, I don't know where that's come from. 584 00:19:38,667 --> 00:19:42,537 But I-I don't think the discipline matters. 585 00:19:42,625 --> 00:19:45,575 If he discovered that origami was the way to worldwide fame, 586 00:19:45,667 --> 00:19:48,377 then he'd be folding paper like a motherfucker. 587 00:19:48,458 --> 00:19:50,168 ♪ Pretty good at this ♪ 588 00:19:50,250 --> 00:19:52,250 ♪ You should swing by the session ♪ 589 00:19:52,333 --> 00:19:54,633 ♪ About a thousand people even think that I'm a legend ♪ 590 00:19:54,709 --> 00:19:57,539 [man] I'm white, I'm Christian, 591 00:19:57,625 --> 00:19:58,785 I smoke cigarettes inside my home, 592 00:19:58,875 --> 00:20:00,165 I eat red meat, 593 00:20:00,250 --> 00:20:01,130 and I live in Los Angeles, California. 594 00:20:01,208 --> 00:20:03,708 I'm the freaking minority. 595 00:20:03,792 --> 00:20:05,792 [laughter and applause] 596 00:20:05,875 --> 00:20:06,785 [woman] And I go in there 597 00:20:06,875 --> 00:20:08,665 and I go up to this male sales assistant, 598 00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:11,080 and I say, "Oh, um, excuse me, um, 599 00:20:11,166 --> 00:20:13,416 can you tell me where I can find the knickers, please?" 600 00:20:13,500 --> 00:20:14,290 And do you know what he whispers to me? 601 00:20:14,375 --> 00:20:17,165 He whispers, "Are you asking me 602 00:20:17,250 --> 00:20:19,710 where you can find the black people?" 603 00:20:19,792 --> 00:20:23,002 [laughter] 604 00:20:23,083 --> 00:20:25,423 I live in Little Baghdad. 605 00:20:25,500 --> 00:20:27,080 I mean, Iran. I mean, Persia. 606 00:20:27,166 --> 00:20:29,576 I mean, Beverly Hills. 607 00:20:29,667 --> 00:20:32,747 [woman guffaws] 608 00:20:32,834 --> 00:20:33,884 It's so crowded there, 609 00:20:33,959 --> 00:20:37,499 you can't even find a place to park your camel. 610 00:20:37,542 --> 00:20:39,922 [laughter] 611 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:43,040 ♪ playful music ♪ 612 00:20:43,125 --> 00:20:47,875 I heard more racism in the hour that I was sat in there 613 00:20:47,959 --> 00:20:49,539 than you get at a Klan rally. 614 00:20:49,625 --> 00:20:52,745 They have a new restaurant. I think it's in Westwood. 615 00:20:52,834 --> 00:20:53,334 It's a fast food joint. 616 00:20:53,417 --> 00:20:56,037 It's called Burka King. 617 00:20:56,125 --> 00:20:58,705 [laughter] 618 00:20:58,792 --> 00:21:00,962 [woman laughing loudly] 619 00:21:01,041 --> 00:21:04,711 ♪♪♪ 620 00:21:04,792 --> 00:21:06,462 It's a funny joke. 621 00:21:06,542 --> 00:21:08,792 [Ben] So you've learned a little bit 622 00:21:08,875 --> 00:21:10,285 about how to do stand-up in America? 623 00:21:10,375 --> 00:21:12,875 Yes, I have learned a little bit 624 00:21:12,959 --> 00:21:13,499 about how to do stand-up in America. 625 00:21:13,583 --> 00:21:15,423 You pick an ethnic group, 626 00:21:15,500 --> 00:21:17,380 and you batter the shit out of them verbally. 627 00:21:17,458 --> 00:21:18,578 [applause] 628 00:21:18,667 --> 00:21:22,287 Comedy comes in many colors, in many ways, in many things, 629 00:21:22,375 --> 00:21:23,285 and I've got a new person. 630 00:21:23,375 --> 00:21:24,625 Can I have your name? 631 00:21:24,709 --> 00:21:25,079 Uh, it's not me, it's my-Rags. 632 00:21:25,166 --> 00:21:26,576 Why don't you? 633 00:21:26,667 --> 00:21:29,287 Oh, with that hair? Give him a round of applause. 634 00:21:29,375 --> 00:21:31,285 He's coming up here. 635 00:21:31,375 --> 00:21:33,875 - We're gonna get you up here. - Whoa. 636 00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:35,459 All right, now, let's do this real quick. 637 00:21:35,542 --> 00:21:36,542 What name are you gonna go by? 638 00:21:36,625 --> 00:21:38,165 - Rags. - Rex. 639 00:21:38,250 --> 00:21:40,540 - Rags. - Rags! Oh, is that what it is? 640 00:21:40,625 --> 00:21:41,955 Let's go from Rags to riches. 641 00:21:42,041 --> 00:21:42,961 Ladies and gentlemen, 642 00:21:43,041 --> 00:21:44,501 bringing up the comedy, Rags! 643 00:21:44,583 --> 00:21:47,173 First time performing. Let's do this. 644 00:21:47,250 --> 00:21:49,080 [Romesh] When he walked up, 645 00:21:49,166 --> 00:21:51,626 I felt terrif-I felt like I was doing my first gig. 646 00:21:51,709 --> 00:21:53,039 Um... 647 00:21:53,125 --> 00:21:55,875 ♪ dramatic percussive music ♪ 648 00:21:55,959 --> 00:21:57,789 My name is Rags. 649 00:21:57,875 --> 00:22:01,165 ♪♪♪ 650 00:22:01,250 --> 00:22:03,460 Uh, I'll have to be honest. 651 00:22:03,542 --> 00:22:04,882 This is the first time I'm standing up 652 00:22:04,959 --> 00:22:07,209 trying to attempt at this, right? 653 00:22:07,291 --> 00:22:08,961 Being a stand-up comedian, I guess. 654 00:22:09,041 --> 00:22:12,291 I came in today thinking that it was gonna be a class, 655 00:22:12,375 --> 00:22:14,205 so I was prepared to bring something. 656 00:22:14,291 --> 00:22:17,171 I was expecting notebook, pen, things like that. 657 00:22:17,250 --> 00:22:20,170 [laughter] 658 00:22:20,250 --> 00:22:23,330 He basically freestyled five minutes of stand-up. 659 00:22:23,417 --> 00:22:24,417 So we used to look over the grass and go, 660 00:22:24,500 --> 00:22:27,880 "Where the fuck are we?" You know what I mean? 661 00:22:27,959 --> 00:22:28,879 - [laughter] - So... 662 00:22:28,959 --> 00:22:31,129 [Romesh] It was great. He was amazing. 663 00:22:31,208 --> 00:22:32,958 I was really proud of him. I was buzzing, watching him. 664 00:22:33,041 --> 00:22:34,671 "How are you enjoying it?" And I said, 665 00:22:34,750 --> 00:22:36,920 "How can I enjoy, darling? My balls are on the ceiling." 666 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:38,710 [laughter] 667 00:22:38,792 --> 00:22:40,962 [Romesh] I thought his delivery was perfect. 668 00:22:41,041 --> 00:22:42,251 I thought, you know, he had some good jokes in there. 669 00:22:42,333 --> 00:22:43,793 It's his first time ever. 670 00:22:43,875 --> 00:22:45,745 He's just pulling them out of the air. 671 00:22:45,834 --> 00:22:46,964 I thought it was great. 672 00:22:47,041 --> 00:22:48,831 You were absolutely fantastic. 673 00:22:48,917 --> 00:22:49,957 - Yeah? - How did it feel? 674 00:22:50,041 --> 00:22:51,081 I feel like I can do it, yeah. 675 00:22:51,166 --> 00:22:52,956 [Romesh] I thought you were better than everyone. 676 00:22:53,041 --> 00:22:54,711 I mean, I didn't want to push too hard, 677 00:22:54,792 --> 00:22:55,922 but at the end of the day, 678 00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:57,710 maybe a possibility at some stage 679 00:22:57,792 --> 00:23:00,382 that I could do a little bit with you, or...? 680 00:23:00,458 --> 00:23:02,498 [music stops] 681 00:23:02,625 --> 00:23:05,245 Uh, I'm not saying that we've created a monster. 682 00:23:05,333 --> 00:23:07,423 I'm just thinking, like, as a small guest spot or something. 683 00:23:07,500 --> 00:23:11,830 Why don't we enjoy tonight? Yeah? 684 00:23:11,917 --> 00:23:14,167 We might've created a monster. 685 00:23:14,250 --> 00:23:17,420 ♪ staccato orchestral music ♪ 686 00:23:17,500 --> 00:23:19,040 ♪♪♪ 687 00:23:19,125 --> 00:23:21,205 Did you contact any of those blokes? 688 00:23:21,291 --> 00:23:23,671 I had good time cooking and watching them, 689 00:23:23,750 --> 00:23:24,290 but... 690 00:23:24,375 --> 00:23:26,875 I didn't like any of them. 691 00:23:26,959 --> 00:23:28,079 You don't know my taste. 692 00:23:28,166 --> 00:23:29,956 What is your taste? 693 00:23:30,041 --> 00:23:31,881 Tall black men. 694 00:23:31,959 --> 00:23:33,249 Sorry, did you just say your taste is tall black men? 695 00:23:33,333 --> 00:23:36,463 - Yes. - [chuckles] 696 00:23:36,542 --> 00:23:37,752 Okay, well... 697 00:23:37,834 --> 00:23:41,584 So I think I've been smashing life, basically. 698 00:23:41,667 --> 00:23:42,457 We had a nice day at the-- 699 00:23:42,542 --> 00:23:44,542 Did you enjoy your date-dating? 700 00:23:44,625 --> 00:23:45,575 Yeah, it was lovely. It was really nice. 701 00:23:45,667 --> 00:23:47,787 And Rags and I actually had a nice time 702 00:23:47,875 --> 00:23:49,535 at the stand-up class. 703 00:23:49,625 --> 00:23:50,245 [Leesa] Why did you take him to a stand-up class? 704 00:23:50,333 --> 00:23:52,673 He's agreed that I'm gonna be 705 00:23:52,750 --> 00:23:54,920 a-a good stand-up comedian, 706 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:56,420 so I'll be the second act, backing him. 707 00:23:56,500 --> 00:23:58,880 - The warm-up. - Before he--warm-up guy. 708 00:23:58,959 --> 00:24:00,379 [Leesa] You need to have 20 minutes-- 709 00:24:00,458 --> 00:24:02,038 I'll get 'em really nice and wet. 710 00:24:02,125 --> 00:24:03,955 And then he comes on stage. 711 00:24:04,041 --> 00:24:05,041 - Ew. - Why would you say "wet"? 712 00:24:05,125 --> 00:24:07,785 - Sweating in laughter. - No-nobody says that. 713 00:24:07,875 --> 00:24:08,995 Nobody says that. 714 00:24:09,083 --> 00:24:10,253 It means something else in the U.K. 715 00:24:10,333 --> 00:24:13,423 I think it's nice of Romesh to give you an opportunity. 716 00:24:13,500 --> 00:24:14,750 Yeah, I agree with that. 717 00:24:14,834 --> 00:24:16,134 He's only gone with you to the stand-up, 718 00:24:16,208 --> 00:24:18,078 he only took you to the dating thing, 719 00:24:18,166 --> 00:24:19,826 he only went on that horse riding date with me 720 00:24:19,917 --> 00:24:21,287 because of that focus group. 721 00:24:21,375 --> 00:24:22,455 I hold my hands up. 722 00:24:22,542 --> 00:24:24,422 I reacted to the focus group. 723 00:24:24,500 --> 00:24:25,960 They were saying I was a jerk. 724 00:24:26,041 --> 00:24:26,831 They were saying I was horrible to you. 725 00:24:26,917 --> 00:24:28,957 They were saying I was horrible to you. 726 00:24:29,041 --> 00:24:30,081 The sort of thing that got to me the most 727 00:24:30,166 --> 00:24:32,576 is, like, them saying I'm boring, if I'm being honest. 728 00:24:32,667 --> 00:24:33,457 When we all are together, 729 00:24:33,542 --> 00:24:36,632 but you don't say much, uh... 730 00:24:36,709 --> 00:24:38,789 So you think I'm boring? 731 00:24:38,875 --> 00:24:40,035 I like you being boring. 732 00:24:40,125 --> 00:24:41,205 - Uh-huh. - That's what I'm saying. 733 00:24:41,291 --> 00:24:44,131 Yeah, so you're agreeing. You all think I'm boring. 734 00:24:44,208 --> 00:24:45,628 [Shanthi] No, I don't-I didn't say that. 735 00:24:45,709 --> 00:24:47,579 You think I'm boring, you think I'm boring. 736 00:24:47,667 --> 00:24:50,287 - You think I'm boring. - A little bit boring. 737 00:24:50,375 --> 00:24:53,665 All right, well, would a boring person do this? 738 00:24:55,333 --> 00:24:57,133 [Rags] Oh, my God. 739 00:24:59,959 --> 00:25:02,959 Are you crazy? You nutter. 740 00:25:03,041 --> 00:25:05,251 Huh? It's sugar glass. I set it up. 741 00:25:05,333 --> 00:25:07,213 [whispering] Fucking hell. 742 00:25:07,291 --> 00:25:09,581 This guy's mad. 743 00:25:09,667 --> 00:25:12,037 Huh? 744 00:25:12,125 --> 00:25:14,875 ♪ playful music ♪ 745 00:25:14,959 --> 00:25:15,499 You've got to admit that that was impressive. 746 00:25:15,583 --> 00:25:17,543 I mean, that is me... 747 00:25:17,583 --> 00:25:20,503 I mean, the focus group, show 'em that. 748 00:25:20,583 --> 00:25:23,043 Show 'em a bit of that. See what they think then. 749 00:25:23,125 --> 00:25:24,575 [Ben] You said the whole way along that the focus group 750 00:25:24,667 --> 00:25:25,827 has not bothered you. 751 00:25:25,917 --> 00:25:26,457 Are you at least admitting now 752 00:25:26,542 --> 00:25:29,672 that it did bother you? 753 00:25:29,750 --> 00:25:33,080 ♪♪♪ 754 00:25:33,166 --> 00:25:34,996 Yes, it really did bother me. 755 00:25:35,083 --> 00:25:36,423 Was that not exciting? 756 00:25:36,500 --> 00:25:37,580 [Rags] That's not exciting. 757 00:25:37,667 --> 00:25:39,077 Leesa, did you not find that-- 758 00:25:39,166 --> 00:25:40,246 - I was scared. - I was scared as well. 759 00:25:40,333 --> 00:25:42,333 Man, I got such a fear, 760 00:25:42,417 --> 00:25:45,167 I thought you were gonna cut your neck off or something. 761 00:25:45,250 --> 00:25:46,420 [Ben] It looked a little bit suicidal. 762 00:25:46,500 --> 00:25:49,000 Yeah, I can see that. Yeah. 763 00:25:49,083 --> 00:25:51,543 You-you say, "You think I'm boring, 764 00:25:51,625 --> 00:25:52,915 you think I'm boring, you think I'm boring," 765 00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:55,210 then you jump through a sheet of glass. 766 00:25:55,291 --> 00:25:58,501 That is probably a man trying to kill himself. 767 00:25:58,583 --> 00:26:00,423 Go back to being boring. 768 00:26:01,959 --> 00:26:03,379 You better get the dustpan and brush. 769 00:26:03,458 --> 00:26:05,748 Yeah, clean it up. 770 00:26:05,834 --> 00:26:06,714 Okay. I'm sorry. 771 00:26:06,792 --> 00:26:10,172 Was is not even a little bit exciting? 772 00:26:13,083 --> 00:26:15,503 [sighs] Fuck. 773 00:26:15,583 --> 00:26:17,383 ♪ I keep pushing mommies ♪ 774 00:26:17,458 --> 00:26:18,628 ♪ Please don't try and tell me nothin' ♪ 775 00:26:18,709 --> 00:26:20,459 ♪ You are not my demographic ♪ 776 00:26:20,542 --> 00:26:22,002 ♪ I don't care if you say fuck him ♪ 777 00:26:22,083 --> 00:26:23,923 ♪ I'm erratic with my rappin' ♪ 778 00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:25,960 ♪ Give a fuck if you say somethin' 'bout my lyrics ♪ 779 00:26:26,041 --> 00:26:27,211 ♪ I spit lyrics for the nutter showin' lovin' ♪ 780 00:26:27,291 --> 00:26:28,041 ♪ I'll be sittin' here ♪ 781 00:26:28,125 --> 00:26:29,745 ♪ See my future crystal clear ♪ 782 00:26:29,834 --> 00:26:31,504 ♪ Sippin' on a whiskey ♪ 783 00:26:31,583 --> 00:26:33,463 ♪ On the beach in sunny center ♪ 784 00:26:33,542 --> 00:26:35,462 ♪ How we never liked the idea idolizing fuckin' neeks ♪ 785 00:26:35,542 --> 00:26:37,002 ♪ Ralph Lauren was such a cheat ♪ 786 00:26:37,083 --> 00:26:38,253 ♪ But man they rock him on the streets ♪ 787 00:26:38,333 --> 00:26:39,503 ♪ I'm sittin' here ♪ 788 00:26:39,583 --> 00:26:41,043 ♪ I don't rock no cedar wood ♪ 789 00:26:41,125 --> 00:26:41,705 ♪ Man I'm tryna speak as good ♪ 790 00:26:41,792 --> 00:26:44,002 ♪ Okay fam read a book ♪ 791 00:26:44,083 --> 00:26:44,753 ♪ Grab a matchstick and some oil ♪ 792 00:26:44,834 --> 00:26:46,754 ♪ Be a G, eat the top ♪ 793 00:26:46,834 --> 00:26:49,754 [bright tone]