1 00:00:01,583 --> 00:00:03,503 [bright tone] 2 00:00:05,750 --> 00:00:09,250 [seagulls crying] 3 00:00:09,333 --> 00:00:12,333 ♪ sedate orchestral music ♪ 4 00:00:12,417 --> 00:00:14,917 ♪♪♪ 5 00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:17,790 [Shanthi] Let me get some nice clothes for you, Romi. 6 00:00:17,875 --> 00:00:19,325 [Romesh] Yeah? What would you choose for me? 7 00:00:19,417 --> 00:00:21,127 Because I'll be honest. I don't really trust your taste. 8 00:00:21,208 --> 00:00:22,078 I like that shorts behind you. 9 00:00:22,166 --> 00:00:24,916 Yeah. Like, that's the sort of thing 10 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:26,420 that shows you don't know anything about me, Mum. 11 00:00:26,500 --> 00:00:28,420 I don't like the style-- your style at all. 12 00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:29,750 Why? What's wrong with my style? 13 00:00:29,834 --> 00:00:32,214 Look at you. Look at your neck. 14 00:00:32,291 --> 00:00:33,001 Why you have to put the buttons up here? 15 00:00:33,083 --> 00:00:35,923 It's like a stuffed turkey. 16 00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:37,580 Let me try. 17 00:00:37,667 --> 00:00:39,537 Maybe you're afraid to show your boobs, I think. 18 00:00:39,625 --> 00:00:41,165 Yeah, that's right. My boobs are up here, 19 00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:41,920 just underneath my Adam's apple. 20 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:44,210 Anyway, forget that. 21 00:00:44,291 --> 00:00:46,171 Shall we select some clothes, da? 22 00:00:46,250 --> 00:00:47,750 Okay, well, I've got some great news for you, actually. 23 00:00:47,834 --> 00:00:48,504 What's that? 24 00:00:48,583 --> 00:00:50,713 Uncle Rags is coming to America. 25 00:00:50,792 --> 00:00:52,792 What? 26 00:00:52,875 --> 00:00:56,455 So you are calling him all the way from Australia? 27 00:00:56,542 --> 00:00:58,082 Yes. 28 00:00:58,166 --> 00:00:59,626 I don't know why you need him there. 29 00:00:59,709 --> 00:01:00,459 I just think he's a good person to have-- 30 00:01:00,542 --> 00:01:03,082 Look at the way he dress up, da. 31 00:01:03,166 --> 00:01:05,286 - [Romesh] Yeah, he looks-- - He looks like a drug dealer. 32 00:01:05,375 --> 00:01:06,875 Ask him to dress well. 33 00:01:06,959 --> 00:01:10,249 I don't want this shaved hair, ponytail here. 34 00:01:10,333 --> 00:01:10,963 He's a good energy to have around, Mom. 35 00:01:11,041 --> 00:01:13,381 He's, like, positive. 36 00:01:13,458 --> 00:01:16,288 So when I tell you to be the positive things, 37 00:01:16,375 --> 00:01:17,955 you are saying, "I'm not going to listen to you." 38 00:01:18,041 --> 00:01:20,131 You said I've got boobs. 39 00:01:20,208 --> 00:01:22,958 Is he coming before me to LA? 40 00:01:24,041 --> 00:01:26,751 What do you think of this? 41 00:01:28,625 --> 00:01:31,625 ♪ dramatic piano music ♪ 42 00:01:31,709 --> 00:01:36,579 ♪♪♪ 43 00:01:38,750 --> 00:01:40,920 [man] So what do you want to achieve this week? 44 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:43,460 I want to, um, meet up with some people 45 00:01:43,542 --> 00:01:44,882 to talk about how I can actually 46 00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:46,499 sort of push my brand over here 47 00:01:46,583 --> 00:01:48,423 and work out how me and Rags are gonna work together. 48 00:01:48,500 --> 00:01:49,420 [man] Some people might think it's a bit weird 49 00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:52,170 that you've taken your uncle out here first, 50 00:01:52,250 --> 00:01:53,130 before your wife and kids. 51 00:01:53,208 --> 00:01:55,708 If Leesa and the kids came here, 52 00:01:55,792 --> 00:01:56,422 Leesa would be like, "Why the shit 53 00:01:56,500 --> 00:01:58,750 are we staying in a motel?" 54 00:01:58,834 --> 00:02:01,214 Rags'll come in and go, "Fuck, it's indoors? 55 00:02:01,291 --> 00:02:02,791 Amazing!" 56 00:02:02,875 --> 00:02:04,125 ♪ I stay humble ♪ 57 00:02:04,208 --> 00:02:06,208 ♪ And I can't grumble ♪ 58 00:02:06,291 --> 00:02:07,881 ♪ Juggling shit these days just blazin' ♪ 59 00:02:07,959 --> 00:02:09,709 [man] How would you describe him? 60 00:02:09,792 --> 00:02:11,382 [Romesh] He's like an older version of me, 61 00:02:11,458 --> 00:02:14,418 but with a genuine, actual lust for life. 62 00:02:14,500 --> 00:02:16,330 ♪ rap music with distorted vocal backup ♪ 63 00:02:16,417 --> 00:02:17,247 ♪ Yeah 4:20 on the clock ♪ 64 00:02:17,333 --> 00:02:19,963 ♪ And I'm ready for the drop ♪ 65 00:02:20,041 --> 00:02:21,751 ♪ You can tell that it's never gonna stop ♪ 66 00:02:21,834 --> 00:02:23,214 ♪ By the way that I'm bowling ♪ 67 00:02:23,291 --> 00:02:24,961 - [laughter] - Shit. 68 00:02:25,041 --> 00:02:26,881 Hi, man. 69 00:02:26,959 --> 00:02:29,249 - Good to see you, brother. - Yes, good to see you. 70 00:02:29,333 --> 00:02:31,213 Very good. What the hell is this, man? 71 00:02:31,291 --> 00:02:31,921 This is a vehicle, bro. 72 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:33,540 Why have you got this? 73 00:02:33,625 --> 00:02:35,875 We got to be different. You know what I mean? 74 00:02:35,959 --> 00:02:37,379 Because this LA, bro. 75 00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:39,628 Yeah, no, I get your, uh, philosophy. 76 00:02:39,709 --> 00:02:41,289 It's very nice. 77 00:02:41,375 --> 00:02:42,745 You know, we could've gone and got a Maserati, 78 00:02:42,834 --> 00:02:43,634 you know, like, a convertible or something, 79 00:02:43,709 --> 00:02:45,709 but, I mean, it's gonna cost us a-- 80 00:02:45,792 --> 00:02:46,502 - I know. I get it. - I mean, this is cool. 81 00:02:46,583 --> 00:02:48,583 - Yeah. - I mean, you'll love it. 82 00:02:48,667 --> 00:02:49,417 Once you hit the highway, man, it goes, bro. 83 00:02:49,500 --> 00:02:51,830 Well, let me show you the hotel first. 84 00:02:51,917 --> 00:02:53,417 Ah, Rom, look. 85 00:02:53,500 --> 00:02:54,330 Mate, I've seen all this before. 86 00:02:54,417 --> 00:02:56,537 What's the big deal about this hotel? 87 00:02:56,667 --> 00:02:58,077 - I mean, it's all right. - Yeah. 88 00:02:58,125 --> 00:02:59,245 You got a place to sleep in, right? 89 00:02:59,333 --> 00:03:00,883 - Yeah. - That's fine, bro. 90 00:03:00,959 --> 00:03:02,579 Let's go and get the shit done, all right? 91 00:03:02,667 --> 00:03:04,127 That's the main thing. What do you got planned for me? 92 00:03:04,208 --> 00:03:05,418 I'm trying to figure out a way 93 00:03:05,500 --> 00:03:07,750 of, like, marketing myself over here, 94 00:03:07,834 --> 00:03:09,794 so I've arranged a couple of meetings 95 00:03:09,875 --> 00:03:11,325 with, like, brand marketing consultants. 96 00:03:11,417 --> 00:03:12,997 Beautiful, man. Let's go and do it. 97 00:03:13,083 --> 00:03:14,383 All right. 98 00:03:14,458 --> 00:03:16,168 Are you honestly all right to drive this? 99 00:03:16,250 --> 00:03:18,210 Yeah, I'm--I'm cool, mate. 100 00:03:18,291 --> 00:03:19,711 Okay. 101 00:03:19,792 --> 00:03:20,542 Oh, Jesus. Don't hit this guy, please. 102 00:03:20,625 --> 00:03:22,205 - [car horn honks] - [Romesh] Fuck. 103 00:03:22,291 --> 00:03:23,881 We're gonna have to... 104 00:03:23,959 --> 00:03:25,459 Oh, my God, this is terrifying. 105 00:03:25,542 --> 00:03:27,332 What? Am I going too close? 106 00:03:27,417 --> 00:03:29,957 [Romesh] Is there a spot you're going for? 107 00:03:30,041 --> 00:03:32,791 [Rags] Kind of this one. I don't know. 108 00:03:32,875 --> 00:03:35,535 I can't see you! 109 00:03:35,625 --> 00:03:36,125 Rom, can you hear me? 110 00:03:36,208 --> 00:03:38,078 Rom, can I come in more? 111 00:03:38,166 --> 00:03:39,456 No, no, no, no, no! 112 00:03:39,542 --> 00:03:41,502 I can't see you in the mirror. 113 00:03:41,583 --> 00:03:42,753 [Romesh] Rags, go forward. 114 00:03:42,834 --> 00:03:44,294 Yeah. 115 00:03:44,375 --> 00:03:46,825 [bangs on truck] Go full lock right 116 00:03:46,917 --> 00:03:48,377 and reverse slowly-- go full lock. 117 00:03:48,458 --> 00:03:49,878 [Romesh] That's it, keep coming. 118 00:03:49,959 --> 00:03:52,079 No, that way, that way, that way! 119 00:03:52,166 --> 00:03:53,956 Will it be all right if you leave it like this? 120 00:03:54,041 --> 00:03:55,381 [Romesh] You ain't gonna get closer than that, mate. 121 00:03:55,458 --> 00:03:57,788 Just leave it. We get a ticket, we get a ticket. 122 00:03:57,875 --> 00:03:58,915 Yeah, I think we should bloody do it. 123 00:03:59,000 --> 00:03:59,830 Okay, come on, let's go. 124 00:03:59,917 --> 00:04:01,747 Look at the size of the fucking limo. 125 00:04:01,792 --> 00:04:02,792 [Romesh] How was that? 126 00:04:02,875 --> 00:04:04,375 That'll have to do it, man. 127 00:04:04,458 --> 00:04:07,878 [car alarm blaring] 128 00:04:07,959 --> 00:04:10,499 [blaring stops] 129 00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:11,543 ♪ orchestral waltz playing ♪ 130 00:04:11,625 --> 00:04:14,125 [Romesh] This company called Poletus-- 131 00:04:14,208 --> 00:04:15,668 they saw my Instagram profile, 132 00:04:15,750 --> 00:04:16,330 got in touch with me, and said that they could 133 00:04:16,417 --> 00:04:18,667 help with my social media, 134 00:04:18,750 --> 00:04:20,500 so I thought I'd give it a go. 135 00:04:20,583 --> 00:04:22,333 [Rishabh] Uh, first things first, 136 00:04:22,417 --> 00:04:23,667 pretty much everything you've been doing 137 00:04:23,750 --> 00:04:25,290 with your social media has been wrong. 138 00:04:25,375 --> 00:04:26,785 The fact that you have not been creating 139 00:04:26,875 --> 00:04:28,075 an emotional connection with your fans, right? 140 00:04:28,166 --> 00:04:29,826 So is my content no good? 141 00:04:29,917 --> 00:04:30,997 Yeah, content pretty much sucks as well. 142 00:04:31,083 --> 00:04:32,173 Sorry. 143 00:04:32,250 --> 00:04:34,170 Okay. What else? 144 00:04:34,250 --> 00:04:36,420 You usually do not use 145 00:04:36,500 --> 00:04:38,330 more than about two to three hashtags. 146 00:04:38,417 --> 00:04:40,167 [Rishabh] That's not good social media practice. 147 00:04:40,250 --> 00:04:41,130 So are you supposed to hashtag every post? 148 00:04:41,208 --> 00:04:43,458 I mean, like, for example, 149 00:04:43,542 --> 00:04:45,002 let's say if you were into deadpan comedy. 150 00:04:45,083 --> 00:04:46,293 They would never find your picture, 151 00:04:46,375 --> 00:04:48,325 'cause it is not tagged with it. 152 00:04:48,417 --> 00:04:50,537 [Rishabh] Now, excuse my language. 153 00:04:50,625 --> 00:04:52,375 One of your most engaging hashtags 154 00:04:52,458 --> 00:04:54,038 has been "#FuckTravel." 155 00:04:54,125 --> 00:04:55,625 - Very relatable. - [Romesh] Yeah, thank you. 156 00:04:55,709 --> 00:04:58,209 [Rags] The F-travel really works, though, doesn't it? 157 00:04:58,291 --> 00:04:59,881 So use more of that? 158 00:04:59,959 --> 00:05:02,999 [Bryant] Curate posts around it, so when you are traveling, 159 00:05:03,083 --> 00:05:03,753 - make it this whole thing. - Yeah. 160 00:05:03,834 --> 00:05:04,964 You know, like, #FuckTravel. 161 00:05:05,041 --> 00:05:06,381 [Romesh] Right. 162 00:05:06,458 --> 00:05:08,878 So that's like a brand? #FuckTravel. 163 00:05:08,959 --> 00:05:10,039 Yeah. 164 00:05:10,125 --> 00:05:10,995 Every day is a new day 165 00:05:11,083 --> 00:05:13,333 for you to reaffirm or reimagine your brand. 166 00:05:13,417 --> 00:05:15,707 [Bryant] 'Cause I'm going through your brand, all right? 167 00:05:15,792 --> 00:05:16,332 You're a very unique individual. 168 00:05:16,417 --> 00:05:17,707 You're hilarious, right? 169 00:05:17,792 --> 00:05:20,382 But it doesn't-- it doesn't come off that way. 170 00:05:21,583 --> 00:05:23,253 But it's a dance, right? 171 00:05:23,333 --> 00:05:24,213 Social media is a dance, specifically. 172 00:05:24,291 --> 00:05:25,421 It's 80%, 20%. All right? 173 00:05:25,500 --> 00:05:27,750 80%, I'm gonna inform you. All right? 174 00:05:27,834 --> 00:05:29,384 Boom, boom, I'm gonna inform you. 175 00:05:29,458 --> 00:05:30,708 I'm gonna educate you. I'm gonna love you. 176 00:05:30,792 --> 00:05:32,382 I'm gonna share my journey with you. 177 00:05:32,458 --> 00:05:33,628 Then the other 20% is a call to action. 178 00:05:33,709 --> 00:05:35,329 Exactly. 179 00:05:35,417 --> 00:05:36,417 [Romesh] Can I just ask-- I'm fascinated by this. 180 00:05:36,500 --> 00:05:38,920 - You like it? - I really like it. 181 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:40,710 - Yeah, what is it? - What it is--it's my brand. 182 00:05:40,792 --> 00:05:41,792 - You wear that every day? - [Bryant] I always wear it. 183 00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:44,165 - [Rishabh] He always wears it. - I wear it to bed. 184 00:05:44,250 --> 00:05:45,080 I wear it in the morning. Makes me interesting. 185 00:05:45,166 --> 00:05:46,996 [chuckles] 186 00:05:47,083 --> 00:05:48,213 [Rishabh] Um, so... 187 00:05:48,291 --> 00:05:50,581 our algorithm went through 188 00:05:50,667 --> 00:05:52,497 each and every post that you have had, 189 00:05:52,583 --> 00:05:54,753 and what we found out were 190 00:05:54,834 --> 00:05:56,754 your most engaging emotions-- but you don't do them often-- 191 00:05:56,834 --> 00:06:00,004 are actually when you're being very inspirational, 192 00:06:00,083 --> 00:06:02,583 you're being very reflective, okay? 193 00:06:02,667 --> 00:06:04,747 And you're also being a little bit angry. 194 00:06:04,834 --> 00:06:05,964 But I don't think I've been inspirational 195 00:06:06,041 --> 00:06:06,711 in my entire life. 196 00:06:06,792 --> 00:06:08,962 But that's what you think. 197 00:06:09,041 --> 00:06:10,631 They see something in you maybe--I hate to say it-- 198 00:06:10,709 --> 00:06:13,039 maybe you haven't seen in yourself yet, you know? 199 00:06:13,125 --> 00:06:13,915 Look at what you're trying to do. 200 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:15,710 It's one of the most inspirational things 201 00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:17,422 I've ever seen, okay? 202 00:06:17,500 --> 00:06:19,920 People are actually looking up to you, 203 00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:21,080 and I think maybe you need to own it. 204 00:06:21,166 --> 00:06:23,626 You have to really own it that, yes, you know what? 205 00:06:23,709 --> 00:06:26,039 I am a comedian. I actually change lives. 206 00:06:26,125 --> 00:06:26,495 Yes. 207 00:06:26,583 --> 00:06:28,293 Why do you think 208 00:06:28,375 --> 00:06:31,035 I am giving my time 209 00:06:31,125 --> 00:06:32,455 to you? 210 00:06:32,542 --> 00:06:34,252 [Bryant] How do you feel? 211 00:06:34,333 --> 00:06:35,713 'Cause look at how passionate he is, 212 00:06:35,792 --> 00:06:38,462 and I'm not getting the same back from you. 213 00:06:38,542 --> 00:06:40,382 [Romesh] It was an unusual resolution 214 00:06:40,458 --> 00:06:41,788 in that after having initially got in touch with me, 215 00:06:41,875 --> 00:06:44,915 the resolution was that they didn't want to work with me. 216 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:48,000 He's telling me he wants to fill out 6,000 seats, 217 00:06:48,083 --> 00:06:49,463 and he's barely talking. 218 00:06:49,542 --> 00:06:51,002 [Romesh] So apparently I don't have 219 00:06:51,083 --> 00:06:52,463 the requisite energy that they require 220 00:06:52,542 --> 00:06:55,082 in order to get on board with me. 221 00:06:55,166 --> 00:06:56,666 What they were also very annoyed about 222 00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:58,920 was the existence of Rags. 223 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:01,080 If he was to get, like, this sort of numbers 224 00:07:01,166 --> 00:07:02,536 following him that you're talking about, right? 225 00:07:02,625 --> 00:07:04,075 - Sure. - Would that guarantee him 226 00:07:04,166 --> 00:07:06,536 a star role in a movie here in Hollywood? 227 00:07:06,625 --> 00:07:07,785 - It's a currency now. - [Rishabh] It opens the door. 228 00:07:07,875 --> 00:07:09,375 It's a currency now. Absolutely. 229 00:07:09,458 --> 00:07:10,498 [Rishabh] It's called social currency. 230 00:07:10,583 --> 00:07:11,833 - Okay. - [Rags] From there, 231 00:07:11,917 --> 00:07:13,247 can we speak to Steven Spielberg 232 00:07:13,333 --> 00:07:14,173 or some big director or producer, 233 00:07:14,291 --> 00:07:15,541 someone like that? 234 00:07:15,625 --> 00:07:17,785 Do you guys do things like that? 235 00:07:17,875 --> 00:07:19,455 No, we're an intelligence company. 236 00:07:19,542 --> 00:07:22,292 Yeah, so pretty much, you give a plan, like-- 237 00:07:22,375 --> 00:07:24,495 No, it's more than that. 238 00:07:24,583 --> 00:07:26,753 We help a crash-and-burn scenario, 239 00:07:26,834 --> 00:07:28,464 because this right here is a crash-and-burn scenario. 240 00:07:28,542 --> 00:07:30,462 But would you be able to guarantee, like, 241 00:07:30,542 --> 00:07:32,132 within this period 242 00:07:32,208 --> 00:07:34,458 that you would get so many fans or something like that? 243 00:07:34,542 --> 00:07:35,962 Wait a second, Uncle. 244 00:07:36,041 --> 00:07:37,291 In all of my marketing, I've never heard 245 00:07:37,375 --> 00:07:40,575 a more ridiculous assumption. 246 00:07:40,667 --> 00:07:42,457 [Romesh] They didn't like Rags, 247 00:07:42,542 --> 00:07:44,082 and by "didn't like," 248 00:07:44,166 --> 00:07:45,956 I mean, "fucking hated him, wanted him dead." 249 00:07:46,041 --> 00:07:47,631 Hey, do you want to see something cool? 250 00:07:47,709 --> 00:07:49,879 - Yeah, of--always. - All right, cool. 251 00:07:49,959 --> 00:07:51,749 Let me blow your mind away. Hold on. 252 00:07:51,834 --> 00:07:53,504 Am I--are we following you? 253 00:07:53,583 --> 00:07:55,253 [man] Did they have any good ideas? 254 00:07:55,333 --> 00:07:56,503 Yeah, they did. 255 00:07:56,583 --> 00:07:57,543 My Instagram is shit. 256 00:07:57,625 --> 00:08:00,285 I'm not great on Twitter. So I did-- 257 00:08:00,375 --> 00:08:02,285 I do take some of those tips on board, 258 00:08:02,375 --> 00:08:05,035 but all of that was sort of undermined 259 00:08:05,125 --> 00:08:06,995 by the way that they decided to close out the meeting. 260 00:08:07,083 --> 00:08:09,083 [intense piano music] 261 00:08:09,166 --> 00:08:15,036 ♪♪♪ 262 00:08:34,750 --> 00:08:36,880 [airy flute music] 263 00:08:36,959 --> 00:08:39,459 [Romesh] Even if they'd said, "We want to work with you. 264 00:08:39,542 --> 00:08:41,042 We can sell out the Greek," 265 00:08:41,125 --> 00:08:41,825 and then he'd started playing the flute, 266 00:08:41,917 --> 00:08:43,877 I'd go, "I'm sorry, man. I'm out." 267 00:08:43,959 --> 00:08:45,999 Also, you're an Indian in America. 268 00:08:46,083 --> 00:08:47,213 They don't know much about us, mate. 269 00:08:47,291 --> 00:08:48,211 Don't play the flute. 270 00:08:48,291 --> 00:08:49,631 They'll think you're a fucking snake charmer. 271 00:08:49,667 --> 00:08:52,287 Don't reinforce a stereotype. 272 00:08:52,375 --> 00:08:55,375 [flute music continues] 273 00:08:55,458 --> 00:08:57,128 ♪♪♪ 274 00:08:57,208 --> 00:08:58,748 ♪ sedate jazz music ♪ 275 00:08:58,834 --> 00:09:00,794 [Rags] That guy was going around in circles 276 00:09:00,875 --> 00:09:03,325 - about the same thing-- - Yeah, that is true. 277 00:09:03,417 --> 00:09:05,577 Social media, social media, social media. 278 00:09:05,667 --> 00:09:07,127 I thought they were weird guys, 279 00:09:07,208 --> 00:09:08,998 but I thought they had some nice ideas. 280 00:09:09,083 --> 00:09:10,333 The thing that they were talking about 281 00:09:10,417 --> 00:09:11,207 maybe, you know, keeping it 282 00:09:11,291 --> 00:09:13,461 a little bit positive, inspirational-- 283 00:09:13,542 --> 00:09:16,292 - [Jose] Hey, Rom! - Jose! 284 00:09:16,375 --> 00:09:17,245 - What's up? - How you doing, man? 285 00:09:17,333 --> 00:09:19,003 - How's it going? - How's it going, man? 286 00:09:19,083 --> 00:09:20,083 - All right. - Good seeing you. 287 00:09:20,166 --> 00:09:21,076 This is my Uncle Rags. 288 00:09:21,166 --> 00:09:22,286 Hey, nice to meet you. 289 00:09:22,375 --> 00:09:23,285 - Is this Jose? - My name's Jose. 290 00:09:23,375 --> 00:09:25,455 Hey, I heard about you, man. How you doing, bro? 291 00:09:25,542 --> 00:09:26,542 I love your hairdo. 292 00:09:26,625 --> 00:09:28,205 Yeah? Oh, thank you, man. 293 00:09:28,291 --> 00:09:30,381 - I like your cap, too. - Nice earrings, too. 294 00:09:30,458 --> 00:09:31,828 - Ah, sit down man. - Yeah, man. 295 00:09:31,917 --> 00:09:32,827 [Jose] You enjoying the food? 296 00:09:32,917 --> 00:09:35,167 - [Romesh] Very nice. - [Rags] Oh, yeah, yeah. 297 00:09:35,250 --> 00:09:36,170 - No, it's nice, yeah. - Really good, huh? 298 00:09:36,250 --> 00:09:40,130 Corn chips could be a little bit more browner. 299 00:09:40,208 --> 00:09:42,128 Yeah, I got to talk to these guys about that. 300 00:09:42,208 --> 00:09:45,328 - Yeah, sounds good. - [laughs] 301 00:09:45,417 --> 00:09:46,877 So how's your day been going? 302 00:09:46,959 --> 00:09:48,629 We had a meeting about marketing, brand-- 303 00:09:48,709 --> 00:09:51,169 - like about marketing myself-- - Yeah, yeah. 304 00:09:51,250 --> 00:09:52,960 - Are you on Instagram? - Yeah. 305 00:09:53,041 --> 00:09:55,041 What sort of hashtags would you put on a photo? 306 00:09:55,125 --> 00:09:56,785 For me, it's just food. 307 00:09:56,875 --> 00:09:57,995 [Romesh] They've told me that I've got to do 308 00:09:58,083 --> 00:09:59,083 more Instagram posts. 309 00:09:59,166 --> 00:09:59,996 Hello, this is me, 310 00:10:00,083 --> 00:10:01,673 with my brother from another mother-- 311 00:10:01,750 --> 00:10:04,500 - Jose. - And another father maybe. 312 00:10:04,583 --> 00:10:07,383 Yeah, and another father. And this is my Uncle Rags. 313 00:10:07,458 --> 00:10:09,668 [Romesh] Say hello, Rags. 314 00:10:09,750 --> 00:10:11,830 Sweet. Bye. 315 00:10:11,917 --> 00:10:12,377 I'll put #Jose, #Ragu. 316 00:10:12,458 --> 00:10:14,708 Any other hashtags? 317 00:10:14,792 --> 00:10:16,002 #Rom. 318 00:10:16,083 --> 00:10:18,253 - #FuckTravel. - Remember the other one? 319 00:10:18,333 --> 00:10:19,583 What was the other one that they said? 320 00:10:19,667 --> 00:10:21,667 I'm not putting #DeadpanComedy. 321 00:10:21,750 --> 00:10:22,500 Deadpan is, like, there's someone from the hospital 322 00:10:22,583 --> 00:10:24,673 gonna bloody like it. 323 00:10:24,750 --> 00:10:25,630 [both] That's a bedpan. 324 00:10:25,709 --> 00:10:29,499 ♪ upbeat percussive music ♪ 325 00:10:29,583 --> 00:10:32,753 ♪♪♪ 326 00:10:32,834 --> 00:10:34,714 [Romesh] You know this Instagram post. 327 00:10:34,792 --> 00:10:36,542 Oh, right, with Jose? 328 00:10:36,625 --> 00:10:38,875 Yeah. 17,000 views. 329 00:10:38,959 --> 00:10:40,209 There you go. 330 00:10:40,291 --> 00:10:42,041 So I've got to call Leesa. 331 00:10:42,125 --> 00:10:44,165 She just said I need to call her about the house, 332 00:10:44,250 --> 00:10:47,630 and I've done absolutely nothing about it, so... 333 00:10:47,709 --> 00:10:48,879 How hard would that be, man? 334 00:10:48,959 --> 00:10:50,539 Just get on the Internet, Google it, 335 00:10:50,625 --> 00:10:52,035 and fucking find it, man. 336 00:10:52,125 --> 00:10:53,825 It's not as easy as that. 337 00:10:53,917 --> 00:10:55,667 You have to, like, find the right place, don't you? 338 00:10:55,750 --> 00:10:57,880 You have to go and look at places. 339 00:10:57,959 --> 00:10:59,419 When have we had time to do that? 340 00:10:59,500 --> 00:11:00,830 I mean, all she wants is a nice place, right? 341 00:11:00,917 --> 00:11:04,327 With a pool and a big garden and things like that 342 00:11:04,417 --> 00:11:06,037 and, like, a few bedrooms for the kids. 343 00:11:06,125 --> 00:11:07,625 You've described a house, yes. 344 00:11:07,709 --> 00:11:10,959 Yeah, get a nice big place, and she will be happy. 345 00:11:11,041 --> 00:11:12,581 Man, don't tell her I'm here, all right? 346 00:11:12,667 --> 00:11:14,577 - [line trilling] - Why? 347 00:11:14,667 --> 00:11:16,037 Because then I have to get involved, because-- 348 00:11:16,125 --> 00:11:18,495 She's not gonna be dying to talk to you. Don't worry. 349 00:11:18,583 --> 00:11:21,583 - [line trilling] - Hello, it's Rom. 350 00:11:21,667 --> 00:11:23,497 I'm here with Rags. 351 00:11:23,583 --> 00:11:26,253 I'm not here, Leesa. 352 00:11:26,333 --> 00:11:27,583 Yeah, all right. 353 00:11:27,667 --> 00:11:28,827 [Leesa] So... 354 00:11:34,166 --> 00:11:36,076 So have you been looking, then? 355 00:11:36,166 --> 00:11:37,916 But how are you better equipped to look than me? 356 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,290 I'm here, and you're there. You're look-- 357 00:11:44,875 --> 00:11:47,035 So I'm going to see this house for you? 358 00:11:47,125 --> 00:11:47,705 And how much do you like it? 359 00:11:47,792 --> 00:11:50,922 What you shaking your head-- 360 00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,920 Okay, so you want it, do you? 361 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,250 Okay. All right, I'll have a look. 362 00:11:55,333 --> 00:11:57,923 [Romesh] Should we sort out looking at this place, then? 363 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,330 - All right, let's go, man. - All right. 364 00:12:00,417 --> 00:12:03,127 By the way, do you mind driving the vehicle today? 365 00:12:03,208 --> 00:12:03,918 Why? 366 00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:06,170 You want to experience that, mate. 367 00:12:06,250 --> 00:12:07,540 It's bloody nice. 368 00:12:07,625 --> 00:12:09,785 You don't like driving it, do you? 369 00:12:09,875 --> 00:12:11,915 ♪ Scoot ♪ 370 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:13,830 ♪♪♪ 371 00:12:13,917 --> 00:12:16,077 ♪ You see me driving, see me driving ♪ 372 00:12:16,166 --> 00:12:19,206 ♪ Front's out so you know I'm always smiling ♪ 373 00:12:19,291 --> 00:12:22,461 ♪ You say mother hens forever vibing ♪ 374 00:12:22,542 --> 00:12:25,332 ♪ Four by four, we're shining like a diamond ♪ 375 00:12:25,417 --> 00:12:27,167 Thanks a lot, buddy, for driving, all right? 376 00:12:27,250 --> 00:12:28,500 [Romesh] I feel like I'm driving a boat 377 00:12:28,583 --> 00:12:29,713 through LA, man. 378 00:12:29,792 --> 00:12:31,252 [Rags] Yeah, that's what it is. 379 00:12:31,333 --> 00:12:32,293 - And, remember, Rom... - Yeah. 380 00:12:32,375 --> 00:12:34,125 I'm gonna have to be with you for a little while 381 00:12:34,208 --> 00:12:37,668 until I go back, right, to get you through this stage. 382 00:12:37,750 --> 00:12:39,380 - Yeah. - Just please consider that, 383 00:12:39,458 --> 00:12:40,828 you know, I don't want to be, like, 384 00:12:40,917 --> 00:12:42,077 in the way of Leesa and kids and all that. 385 00:12:42,166 --> 00:12:44,956 There's a very easy way for you to do that, actually-- 386 00:12:45,041 --> 00:12:46,461 to be in another house. 387 00:12:48,333 --> 00:12:50,963 ♪ sedate music ♪ 388 00:12:51,041 --> 00:12:52,671 [Romesh] Yeah, this is it. Looks nice, right? 389 00:12:52,750 --> 00:12:54,130 [Rags] Oh, yeah, it looks good, mate. 390 00:12:54,208 --> 00:12:56,628 Yeah, I like those palm trees. 391 00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:58,129 - Hello? - [man] Hey. 392 00:12:58,208 --> 00:12:59,918 - Hi, Romesh. - Romesh. Carmine. 393 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:01,130 - [both] Nice to meet you. - How you doing, man? 394 00:13:01,208 --> 00:13:03,078 - This is my Uncle Rags. - [Rags] Hi. Rags. 395 00:13:03,166 --> 00:13:04,166 - [Carmine] Come on in. - [Rags] All right, thank you. 396 00:13:04,250 --> 00:13:06,830 [Romesh] You've been speaking to Leesa, right? 397 00:13:06,917 --> 00:13:08,377 - [Carmine] Yeah. - [Romesh] So I'm gonna try 398 00:13:08,458 --> 00:13:11,078 - and see if I can get her. - [phone ringing] 399 00:13:11,166 --> 00:13:12,956 - [Leesa] Hello? - Hello? Hello? 400 00:13:13,041 --> 00:13:14,791 We're in the house. This is Carmine, 401 00:13:14,875 --> 00:13:15,875 - who you've spoken to. - Hi, Leesa. How are you? 402 00:13:15,959 --> 00:13:18,129 Good. Well, he's finally here 403 00:13:18,208 --> 00:13:19,708 at the house that you really liked, 404 00:13:19,792 --> 00:13:21,502 so we thought maybe it'd be a good idea 405 00:13:21,583 --> 00:13:23,583 to take you on a little virtual tour with us. 406 00:13:23,667 --> 00:13:24,997 [Carmine] This area particularly, 407 00:13:25,083 --> 00:13:27,463 I think is a nice area for entertaining. 408 00:13:27,542 --> 00:13:28,922 Nice little fireplace. 409 00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:31,500 What do you think, Leesa? 410 00:13:31,583 --> 00:13:33,333 [man] What did you make of the house? 411 00:13:33,417 --> 00:13:34,497 [Romesh] The truth is, my opinion 412 00:13:34,583 --> 00:13:37,003 doesn't really matter in these sorts of decisions. 413 00:13:37,083 --> 00:13:38,833 Look at this. 414 00:13:38,917 --> 00:13:40,997 - Yeah. - So you've got the pool 415 00:13:41,083 --> 00:13:42,963 and the Jacuzzi with the waterfall. 416 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:43,500 [Romesh] The house that we bought in the UK, 417 00:13:43,625 --> 00:13:45,955 I hadn't seen 418 00:13:46,041 --> 00:13:48,041 before we'd made an offer and had it accepted, 419 00:13:48,125 --> 00:13:50,165 and also, I'm just not that fussy, 420 00:13:50,250 --> 00:13:52,920 so how I figure it is, if she likes it, we're in. 421 00:13:52,959 --> 00:13:53,789 [man] Are you saying you bought a house 422 00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:55,625 without having stepped in it? 423 00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:57,249 Correct, yeah. 424 00:13:57,333 --> 00:13:58,333 [Romesh] Leesa, we've seen everything, 425 00:13:58,417 --> 00:14:02,537 so I'm gonna call you back in a bit, all right? 426 00:14:02,625 --> 00:14:03,535 But you like it, yeah? 427 00:14:03,625 --> 00:14:05,915 Yeah, okay. 428 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:09,420 Okay, so how much is it for--for this? 429 00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:13,420 The, uh--the monthly lease is $16,000 a month, 430 00:14:13,500 --> 00:14:14,750 which I know may be a little bit 431 00:14:14,834 --> 00:14:16,214 of a sticker shock for you. 432 00:14:16,291 --> 00:14:18,421 - Yeah. - [laughs] 433 00:14:18,500 --> 00:14:20,330 You know, it's actually pretty reasonable 434 00:14:20,417 --> 00:14:21,877 for this size of a home. 435 00:14:21,959 --> 00:14:24,249 So it's not bad at all, man. 436 00:14:24,333 --> 00:14:25,963 That's quite cheap, isn't it? 437 00:14:26,041 --> 00:14:26,751 Right. 438 00:14:26,834 --> 00:14:28,254 That's very cheap. 439 00:14:28,333 --> 00:14:32,333 Property prices in LA are unacceptable, 440 00:14:32,417 --> 00:14:33,747 and I can't believe 441 00:14:33,834 --> 00:14:35,464 there's a single person living here. 442 00:14:35,542 --> 00:14:36,582 This should be, 443 00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:39,287 like, a desolate Mad Max style ghost town. 444 00:14:39,375 --> 00:14:40,955 You know, it's a lot of money. 445 00:14:41,041 --> 00:14:42,421 Do you know what I mean? And that's why I'm sort of-- 446 00:14:42,500 --> 00:14:43,420 [Carmine] You know, if we are wanting 447 00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:44,630 to go down in price, it's gonna compromise 448 00:14:44,709 --> 00:14:46,999 the size and space. 449 00:14:47,083 --> 00:14:47,793 By how much? 450 00:14:47,875 --> 00:14:49,285 No, if anything, bigger, 451 00:14:49,375 --> 00:14:51,325 - but this is fine. - [Carmine] Right. 452 00:14:51,417 --> 00:14:54,167 [Romesh] I don't know what Uncle Rags was doing. 453 00:14:54,250 --> 00:14:55,750 He was saying it was cheap. 454 00:14:55,834 --> 00:14:56,464 He was saying it's an amazing. 455 00:14:56,542 --> 00:14:58,792 Did you hear him at any point 456 00:14:58,875 --> 00:15:00,125 suggest that he might chip in for the rent? 457 00:15:00,208 --> 00:15:02,538 Leesa--I mean, you heard what Leesa was saying. 458 00:15:02,625 --> 00:15:04,825 Right. 459 00:15:04,917 --> 00:15:06,247 I was just wondering if there's any way 460 00:15:06,333 --> 00:15:09,043 that you could sort of email her to sort of go like, 461 00:15:09,125 --> 00:15:09,955 "This isn't the right place for you." 462 00:15:10,041 --> 00:15:12,671 But I do think it's a good fit. 463 00:15:12,750 --> 00:15:15,130 Yes, I know, I know. 464 00:15:15,208 --> 00:15:16,788 So you want me to lie to Leesa? 465 00:15:16,875 --> 00:15:17,825 - [Romesh] Uh... - [Carmine] 'Cause I'm not 466 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,957 comfortable lying to her about it. 467 00:15:20,041 --> 00:15:22,671 Plan B was to ask Rags and the realtor 468 00:15:22,750 --> 00:15:24,630 to sort of step outside for a little bit 469 00:15:24,709 --> 00:15:25,709 and then call Leesa 470 00:15:25,792 --> 00:15:28,292 and have a proper sort of honest exploration 471 00:15:28,375 --> 00:15:30,075 of the house. 472 00:15:30,166 --> 00:15:31,666 The issue is, I don't want her 473 00:15:31,750 --> 00:15:33,000 to know what the fucking prices are here. 474 00:15:33,083 --> 00:15:35,673 If she's just walked around the house, 475 00:15:35,750 --> 00:15:38,500 she's found it, she loves it, and then I say to her, 476 00:15:38,583 --> 00:15:39,423 "You saw that house that you loved? 477 00:15:39,500 --> 00:15:40,960 You know that level of accommodation 478 00:15:41,041 --> 00:15:43,541 that you think is perfect and ideal? 479 00:15:43,625 --> 00:15:45,995 That's so far above our budget, it's unbelievable." 480 00:15:46,083 --> 00:15:47,503 I reckon we are in. 481 00:15:47,583 --> 00:15:48,883 Yeah, I think it's--I mean, I really do think 482 00:15:48,959 --> 00:15:50,249 - it's the right fit. - Yeah. 483 00:15:50,333 --> 00:15:51,383 It's like going to a kid-- 484 00:15:51,458 --> 00:15:52,378 "Do you like this toy? 485 00:15:52,458 --> 00:15:54,128 Do you like this toy?" 486 00:15:54,208 --> 00:15:55,248 "Yes, it's my favorite toy. I'd love that toy." 487 00:15:55,333 --> 00:15:56,713 "You can't have it." 488 00:15:56,792 --> 00:15:58,292 I'm gonna get him to do this deal for you. 489 00:15:58,375 --> 00:15:59,955 - Yeah. - Right. 490 00:16:00,041 --> 00:16:01,881 So it's gonna beneficial to you and also for us. 491 00:16:01,959 --> 00:16:03,499 - Yeah, of course. - Particularly me, right? 492 00:16:03,625 --> 00:16:04,825 - Yeah. - "Would you like 493 00:16:04,917 --> 00:16:06,037 a much smaller, 494 00:16:06,125 --> 00:16:07,495 shittier version of this toy 495 00:16:07,625 --> 00:16:08,745 that has some safety issues? 496 00:16:08,834 --> 00:16:10,084 'Cause I can get you that." 497 00:16:11,083 --> 00:16:13,293 [stomps foot] That floor is so hard, Leesa. 498 00:16:13,375 --> 00:16:15,495 [stomps foot] Do you not think that's too much? 499 00:16:15,583 --> 00:16:16,583 Can you hear-- [stomps foot] 500 00:16:16,667 --> 00:16:17,627 Can you hear that? 501 00:16:17,709 --> 00:16:19,579 Look at--can you hear that? 502 00:16:22,083 --> 00:16:24,043 Yeah. 503 00:16:24,125 --> 00:16:25,705 [Carmine] Romesh just has to get over the sticker price. 504 00:16:25,792 --> 00:16:26,792 I'll make sure that happens, mate. 505 00:16:26,875 --> 00:16:28,625 - Okay. - He's my nephew. 506 00:16:28,709 --> 00:16:30,039 - You know what I mean? - That's what I'll tell him. 507 00:16:30,125 --> 00:16:31,915 - Right. - That's really dark. 508 00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:32,670 These doors probably suck the light out. 509 00:16:32,750 --> 00:16:34,670 Look at that. 510 00:16:34,750 --> 00:16:37,540 That's horrible, isn't it? 511 00:16:37,625 --> 00:16:39,245 We'll probably end up buying this place. 512 00:16:39,333 --> 00:16:41,423 You know what I mean? That's a very good possibility. 513 00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:42,540 Yeah. 514 00:16:42,625 --> 00:16:43,825 Oh, Jesus! 515 00:16:43,917 --> 00:16:45,077 That is-- 516 00:16:45,166 --> 00:16:47,036 Leesa, that step is a nightmare. 517 00:16:47,125 --> 00:16:49,995 Can you imagine if that was one of the kids or something? 518 00:16:50,083 --> 00:16:51,713 [man] Why are you falling over steps? 519 00:16:51,792 --> 00:16:55,212 Did I pretend to trip over a step that was perfectly fine 520 00:16:55,291 --> 00:16:57,921 in order to help hammer my point home? Yes. 521 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,790 Did I pretend that the wood was really, really dark 522 00:17:00,875 --> 00:17:02,415 and, in fact, it was absolutely beautiful 523 00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:03,210 and possibly some of the nicest interior furnishing 524 00:17:03,291 --> 00:17:05,751 I've ever seen in my life? Yes. 525 00:17:05,834 --> 00:17:08,174 Do I think that what I did was the wrong thing? 526 00:17:08,250 --> 00:17:09,920 No, I don't, 'cause there's absolutely no way 527 00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:10,710 I can afford that fucking place. 528 00:17:10,792 --> 00:17:13,382 I don't know exactly. 529 00:17:13,458 --> 00:17:14,828 I'm gonna find out from the guy in a minute, 530 00:17:14,917 --> 00:17:16,207 but you're sure, though? 531 00:17:16,291 --> 00:17:18,881 Because it is very-- that step's a nightmare. 532 00:17:21,166 --> 00:17:22,786 [Romesh] Thanks very much for that. 533 00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:23,575 - [Carmine] Yeah, of course. - Um... 534 00:17:23,667 --> 00:17:25,747 - How'd it go? - Appreciate it. 535 00:17:25,834 --> 00:17:27,084 Yeah, oh, she loves it, so I guess I'll be in touch. 536 00:17:27,166 --> 00:17:28,876 Yeah, just keep me posted. 537 00:17:28,959 --> 00:17:31,579 I said to him I was gonna be in touch. 538 00:17:31,667 --> 00:17:32,497 Uh... 539 00:17:32,583 --> 00:17:34,883 And that's probably my biggest lie, 540 00:17:34,959 --> 00:17:36,289 because I've got no intention of ever contacting him 541 00:17:36,375 --> 00:17:37,535 ever again in my life. 542 00:17:37,625 --> 00:17:40,745 ♪ Never had a problem with telling you how it is ♪ 543 00:17:40,834 --> 00:17:42,924 ♪ Never had an issue with showing you how it's done ♪ 544 00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:45,460 [insects chirping] 545 00:17:45,542 --> 00:17:48,252 [Romesh] Tomorrow I was thinking we could go to Venice, 546 00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:50,963 - do a load of flyering. - That's old-school, man. 547 00:17:51,041 --> 00:17:52,501 No, I know, but that's what-- that's how I-- 548 00:17:52,583 --> 00:17:53,673 you know, when I was doing Edinburgh Festival, 549 00:17:53,750 --> 00:17:55,130 that's what I did. 550 00:17:55,208 --> 00:17:56,748 I spent hours and hours flyering people. 551 00:17:56,834 --> 00:17:57,714 And what did you get out of it? 552 00:17:57,792 --> 00:18:00,082 We filled the venue that we were playing at. 553 00:18:00,166 --> 00:18:01,746 Whatever you want. That's fine. 554 00:18:01,834 --> 00:18:03,584 Okay, give me an exam-- how would you do it, though? 555 00:18:03,667 --> 00:18:04,577 If you're handing a flyer, what would you s-- 556 00:18:04,667 --> 00:18:06,327 - I would-- - Like, imagine I'm a flyerer. 557 00:18:06,417 --> 00:18:07,957 [Rags] I'll give the flyer, 558 00:18:08,041 --> 00:18:09,711 and then I'd try to take it away from you. 559 00:18:09,792 --> 00:18:12,502 You know, like, that take-away principle. 560 00:18:12,583 --> 00:18:14,293 - You know how it works? - No, go on. 561 00:18:14,375 --> 00:18:16,125 All right, it's just like, you hand over 562 00:18:16,208 --> 00:18:18,748 and let them fucking drool on it, 563 00:18:18,834 --> 00:18:20,084 you know, they look at it and they go, 564 00:18:20,166 --> 00:18:21,956 "Wow, you know, this looks good," 565 00:18:22,041 --> 00:18:23,671 and you bloody take it away from them, mate. 566 00:18:23,750 --> 00:18:24,710 - [Rags] It's gonna work. - So you give them the flyer. 567 00:18:24,792 --> 00:18:26,332 - [Rags] Yeah. - Then as they go to take it, 568 00:18:26,417 --> 00:18:27,287 you take it away? 569 00:18:27,375 --> 00:18:28,745 And then you go, 570 00:18:28,834 --> 00:18:31,174 "Mate, this is one-only show, 571 00:18:31,208 --> 00:18:34,668 but we need you to book it now." 572 00:18:34,750 --> 00:18:36,460 Yeah, but we don't have any tickets. 573 00:18:36,542 --> 00:18:38,582 Oh, shit. We might have to carry a-- 574 00:18:38,667 --> 00:18:41,377 like, a notebook or something, and put their names down. 575 00:18:41,458 --> 00:18:43,628 Carry a notebook? 576 00:18:43,709 --> 00:18:44,709 - [Rags] Yeah. - And write their names down? 577 00:18:44,792 --> 00:18:48,292 Yeah, and then we just come home and sort it out. 578 00:18:48,375 --> 00:18:49,785 You know? You happy with that? 579 00:18:49,875 --> 00:18:52,125 Yeah, I don't know why more people don't do that. 580 00:18:52,208 --> 00:18:54,578 I don't know why they bothered starting up Ticketmaster. 581 00:18:54,667 --> 00:18:55,537 ♪ hip-hop music ♪ 582 00:18:55,625 --> 00:18:58,325 [man] So how's the house hunting going? 583 00:18:58,417 --> 00:19:00,167 [Romesh] Well, actually, I've had some good news 584 00:19:00,250 --> 00:19:01,880 on that front, as in Carmine's actually found a place 585 00:19:01,959 --> 00:19:05,039 that's within budget. 586 00:19:05,125 --> 00:19:06,995 [man] That's good. And have you sorted out the flyers? 587 00:19:07,083 --> 00:19:09,963 Yeah. Here's a flyer. 588 00:19:10,041 --> 00:19:10,631 [man] Isn't that the same photo 589 00:19:10,709 --> 00:19:12,329 you used for your UK tour? 590 00:19:12,417 --> 00:19:13,787 - Yes. - [man] Couldn't you have 591 00:19:13,875 --> 00:19:14,535 done a new one or something fresh? 592 00:19:14,625 --> 00:19:16,035 [Romesh] I haven't changed much 593 00:19:16,125 --> 00:19:17,535 as an image, though, have I? 594 00:19:17,625 --> 00:19:18,785 If I was now living as a white woman, 595 00:19:18,875 --> 00:19:21,995 then, yes, maybe I should get a new photo, but I think-- 596 00:19:22,083 --> 00:19:23,883 I think people will know it's me. 597 00:19:23,959 --> 00:19:25,999 [man singing indistinctly] 598 00:19:26,083 --> 00:19:26,793 Hello, do you like stand-up comedy? 599 00:19:26,875 --> 00:19:28,245 I'm doing a show at the Greek. No? 600 00:19:28,333 --> 00:19:30,423 G'day. Come to our show, man. 601 00:19:30,500 --> 00:19:32,460 It's a comedy show, no? Right. 602 00:19:32,542 --> 00:19:35,502 Stand-up show at the Greek. 603 00:19:35,583 --> 00:19:36,583 Really rude, guys. 604 00:19:36,667 --> 00:19:39,627 [Romesh] Haven't seen you try this takeaway method. 605 00:19:39,709 --> 00:19:40,829 - I did. - When? 606 00:19:40,917 --> 00:19:41,917 - Did you see the-- - No. 607 00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:43,630 Those guys that put the-- 608 00:19:43,709 --> 00:19:45,669 No, look, try it on these people walking to us here. 609 00:19:45,750 --> 00:19:47,130 G'day, gentlemen. 610 00:19:47,208 --> 00:19:49,038 - You guys stayin' here? - No, thanks, man. 611 00:19:49,125 --> 00:19:51,995 [Rags] Yeah, you know, the most famous comedian from UK, man. 612 00:19:52,083 --> 00:19:52,883 - [Romesh] Hey. - What? 613 00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:54,379 [Romesh] You didn't take it away. 614 00:19:54,458 --> 00:19:56,168 He wouldn't take it, would he? 615 00:19:56,250 --> 00:19:58,250 Like, he's got to hold it first for me to take it away, man. 616 00:19:58,333 --> 00:20:00,753 But if he holds it to take it, then he's taken it. 617 00:20:00,834 --> 00:20:02,214 Excuse me. Interested in comedy? 618 00:20:02,291 --> 00:20:03,791 - [woman] No, thank you. - Yeah? 619 00:20:03,875 --> 00:20:06,745 Just have a look at it and see how you go. 620 00:20:06,834 --> 00:20:08,584 - They're just walking away. - You didn't take it. 621 00:20:08,667 --> 00:20:09,577 Not everyone's gonna hold it, are they? 622 00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:12,127 Yeah, but the reason they're not--the reason 623 00:20:12,208 --> 00:20:13,578 they're not holding it is because your method 624 00:20:13,667 --> 00:20:15,417 - is a load of rubbish. - Yeah, no, no, no. 625 00:20:15,500 --> 00:20:16,500 - The method works. - Let me try it. 626 00:20:16,583 --> 00:20:18,963 ♪♪♪ 627 00:20:19,875 --> 00:20:23,125 I cannot explain to you how quickly 628 00:20:23,208 --> 00:20:26,128 my enthusiasm dissolved. 629 00:20:26,208 --> 00:20:28,248 [Rags] Coming for a show? It's a great comedy show, man. 630 00:20:28,333 --> 00:20:29,673 From UK. Here you go. 631 00:20:29,792 --> 00:20:30,502 [Romesh] Oh, you gave one away. 632 00:20:30,542 --> 00:20:34,292 Stand-up comedy show at the Greek? 633 00:20:34,375 --> 00:20:36,325 - Stand-up comedy at the Greek? - [woman] No, thank you. 634 00:20:36,417 --> 00:20:38,127 Comedy at the Greek? Cheers, mate. 635 00:20:38,208 --> 00:20:39,038 Why are they taking them from you and not me? 636 00:20:39,125 --> 00:20:41,785 I have no idea. 637 00:20:41,875 --> 00:20:42,665 [man] Rags was very good at it, wasn't he? 638 00:20:42,750 --> 00:20:45,750 Yeah, Rags was surprisingly good at it. 639 00:20:45,834 --> 00:20:47,254 How you going, bro? Here, it's free. 640 00:20:47,333 --> 00:20:50,793 Why are you telling people it's free? 641 00:20:50,875 --> 00:20:52,785 The--this is free. 642 00:20:52,875 --> 00:20:53,785 [Romesh] He has got a charm 643 00:20:53,875 --> 00:20:56,665 that, when you're around it for a long time, 644 00:20:56,750 --> 00:20:58,040 starts to become irritating, 645 00:20:58,125 --> 00:21:00,455 but, upon initial exposure to it, 646 00:21:00,542 --> 00:21:04,462 is absolutely endearing and enchanting. 647 00:21:04,542 --> 00:21:06,042 - [Rags] Hello, ladies. - [woman] Hello. 648 00:21:06,125 --> 00:21:08,075 We've got a show on the 21st. 649 00:21:08,166 --> 00:21:09,076 - Oh, okay. - So you gonna be here 650 00:21:09,166 --> 00:21:10,456 - on the 21st? - Yeah. 651 00:21:10,542 --> 00:21:11,832 [Rags] All right, cool. 652 00:21:11,917 --> 00:21:12,627 So you should come to this, right? 653 00:21:12,709 --> 00:21:14,379 [Romesh] They just loved him. 654 00:21:14,458 --> 00:21:16,248 Loved him so much, in fact, 655 00:21:16,333 --> 00:21:17,633 that they didn't even bat an eyelid 656 00:21:17,709 --> 00:21:19,829 when he creepily asked for their phone numbers. 657 00:21:19,917 --> 00:21:20,747 And if you can put your details, 658 00:21:20,834 --> 00:21:22,794 - and then we'll call you. - Mm-hmm. 659 00:21:22,875 --> 00:21:24,375 [Romesh] 90% of his conversations 660 00:21:24,458 --> 00:21:26,128 went like this-- "Are you gonna be in LA 661 00:21:26,208 --> 00:21:27,418 for the 21st of December?" 662 00:21:27,500 --> 00:21:28,830 "No." "Why don't you 663 00:21:28,917 --> 00:21:30,997 give me your number, and I'll call you 664 00:21:31,083 --> 00:21:33,963 in case you're in LA on the 21st of December?" 665 00:21:34,041 --> 00:21:35,001 What kind of system is that? 666 00:21:35,083 --> 00:21:37,133 It's better than not doing anything, isn't it? 667 00:21:37,208 --> 00:21:39,668 End of the day, have a go. 668 00:21:39,750 --> 00:21:40,710 If one thing doesn't work, try another. 669 00:21:40,792 --> 00:21:42,332 [Romesh] Let me just point out, he was good 670 00:21:42,417 --> 00:21:44,667 at getting people to talk to him, 671 00:21:44,750 --> 00:21:46,500 but nobody said they were gonna come to the show. 672 00:21:46,583 --> 00:21:48,333 So he and I 673 00:21:48,417 --> 00:21:51,417 took very different paths for the same result. 674 00:21:52,583 --> 00:21:53,923 Look, should we split up for a bit 675 00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:55,000 - and see how we get on? - Yeah, okay. 676 00:21:55,083 --> 00:21:56,753 You head down that way. I'll come find you in a bit. 677 00:21:56,834 --> 00:21:58,834 Yeah. 678 00:21:58,917 --> 00:21:59,827 [Romesh] Now, what was supposed to happen 679 00:21:59,917 --> 00:22:01,997 is that both of us went our separate ways 680 00:22:02,083 --> 00:22:03,633 and sort of flyered the shit out of it, 681 00:22:03,709 --> 00:22:04,579 but I think 682 00:22:04,667 --> 00:22:05,997 what we both accepted 683 00:22:06,083 --> 00:22:07,003 but we left unspoken 684 00:22:07,083 --> 00:22:09,173 was that we both had given up by that stage. 685 00:22:09,250 --> 00:22:13,080 ♪ energetic music ♪ 686 00:22:13,166 --> 00:22:14,496 And, in fact, what we'd actually done 687 00:22:14,583 --> 00:22:15,793 was gone our separate ways 688 00:22:15,875 --> 00:22:16,285 to just have quite a nice day 689 00:22:16,375 --> 00:22:18,665 at Venice Beach. 690 00:22:18,750 --> 00:22:20,790 ♪ Don't move, you gotta first want moves ♪ 691 00:22:20,875 --> 00:22:21,625 ♪ The dogs ain't quiet at the noose ♪ 692 00:22:24,583 --> 00:22:26,713 ♪ Bells on my shoes, smooth like I never do lose ♪ 693 00:22:26,792 --> 00:22:27,252 ♪ Never do it crude, yeah, I'm getting to a groove ♪ 694 00:22:27,333 --> 00:22:29,463 ♪ 'Cause I am ♪ 695 00:22:31,625 --> 00:22:32,955 [Romesh] What I would sum up today is, 696 00:22:33,041 --> 00:22:35,131 professionally, 697 00:22:35,208 --> 00:22:36,628 an abject failure, 698 00:22:36,709 --> 00:22:37,459 but, personally, 699 00:22:37,542 --> 00:22:40,172 I had quite a nice day with Rags. 700 00:22:40,250 --> 00:22:42,380 [insects chirping] 701 00:22:42,458 --> 00:22:44,498 [Rags] So Venice Beach. 702 00:22:44,583 --> 00:22:45,963 What did you think of what we did there? 703 00:22:46,041 --> 00:22:47,381 - After we split up today... - Mm. 704 00:22:47,458 --> 00:22:50,708 ...I threw the flyers in the bin. 705 00:22:50,792 --> 00:22:52,332 Really? 706 00:22:56,458 --> 00:22:59,458 That wasn't what we were supposed to do, man. 707 00:22:59,542 --> 00:23:01,672 [laughter] 708 00:23:07,208 --> 00:23:09,418 Man, an honest question, Rom, right? 709 00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:12,130 - [Rags] Seriously. - Yeah, go on. 710 00:23:12,208 --> 00:23:13,288 - You trust me? - Yes, I trust you. 711 00:23:13,375 --> 00:23:14,245 Yeah? 712 00:23:14,333 --> 00:23:17,213 So let me help you, 713 00:23:17,291 --> 00:23:18,331 you know, pick it up a notch. 714 00:23:18,417 --> 00:23:19,997 You know? Go to the next level. 715 00:23:20,041 --> 00:23:21,961 How do you think we can step it up a level? 716 00:23:22,041 --> 00:23:24,921 You have to somehow get on TV. 717 00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:26,420 You know, all the media. 718 00:23:26,500 --> 00:23:29,420 It's gonna give you amazing exposure, all right? 719 00:23:29,500 --> 00:23:31,750 Do you mean, like, getting your dick out? 720 00:23:31,834 --> 00:23:32,634 Um... 721 00:23:32,709 --> 00:23:35,999 ♪ "Billa" by Dead Players playing ♪ 722 00:23:36,083 --> 00:23:37,213 ♪ Let me show 'em where the future is ♪ 723 00:23:37,291 --> 00:23:39,631 ♪ You underachieve ♪ 724 00:23:39,709 --> 00:23:41,329 [man] So what's happening today? 725 00:23:41,417 --> 00:23:43,457 [Romesh] Well, Rags got frustrated, 726 00:23:43,542 --> 00:23:45,132 and he's come up with this plan now. 727 00:23:45,208 --> 00:23:47,078 He's had a banner made... 728 00:23:47,166 --> 00:23:48,826 ♪ Pump powders into snotty humans ♪ 729 00:23:48,917 --> 00:23:49,957 [Romesh] ...with the show information on, 730 00:23:50,041 --> 00:23:54,001 and he wants us to get into the back of Extra 731 00:23:54,083 --> 00:23:55,833 and just sort of unfurl the banner 732 00:23:55,917 --> 00:23:57,667 as a way of getting instant promotion. 733 00:23:57,750 --> 00:24:00,380 ♪♪♪ 734 00:24:00,458 --> 00:24:01,418 [man] What do you think of that idea? 735 00:24:01,500 --> 00:24:03,500 I think it's a terrible idea. 736 00:24:03,583 --> 00:24:06,333 [Rags] Let's come to terms with this, right? 737 00:24:06,417 --> 00:24:07,827 You're not known here, Rom. 738 00:24:07,917 --> 00:24:10,827 Nobody fucking knows you, man, unfortunately, right? 739 00:24:10,917 --> 00:24:14,827 UK, you're a big star, but here you're nobody, man. 740 00:24:14,917 --> 00:24:17,497 Okay, you don't have to keep reiterating that message. 741 00:24:17,583 --> 00:24:18,833 - I get it. - I'm just letting you know. 742 00:24:18,917 --> 00:24:20,707 Like, you know, just get off your high horse 743 00:24:20,792 --> 00:24:23,172 and try to understand that we want to get 744 00:24:23,250 --> 00:24:25,210 as much exposure as possible. 745 00:24:25,291 --> 00:24:26,921 What? What are you... 746 00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:28,420 - worrying about? - I just think it's fucking-- 747 00:24:28,500 --> 00:24:29,830 It's like a stunt. Do you know what I mean? 748 00:24:29,917 --> 00:24:31,747 It is a stunt. 749 00:24:31,834 --> 00:24:33,174 [Romesh] I don't think two brown guys with beards 750 00:24:33,250 --> 00:24:34,210 - pulling a surprise... - Yeah. 751 00:24:34,291 --> 00:24:36,081 Do you think that's a good move in America? 752 00:24:36,166 --> 00:24:37,416 What, do you think they're gonna think 753 00:24:37,500 --> 00:24:39,920 you're a terrorist or something? 754 00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:41,040 What do you think? 755 00:24:41,125 --> 00:24:42,035 You don't look like a terrorist. 756 00:24:42,125 --> 00:24:44,535 Not to you, I don't, because I'm your nephew. 757 00:24:44,625 --> 00:24:47,035 But we're two brown guys with full beards. 758 00:24:47,125 --> 00:24:48,535 I've got a rucksack on. 759 00:24:48,625 --> 00:24:50,035 - I'd only-- - And we're going to do 760 00:24:50,125 --> 00:24:51,495 a surprise thing on TV? 761 00:24:53,750 --> 00:24:55,210 It's just stupid. 762 00:24:55,291 --> 00:24:57,001 [man] If it's any motivation, 763 00:24:57,041 --> 00:25:01,081 I spoke to the Greek, and he's still only sold 27 tickets. 764 00:25:01,166 --> 00:25:03,876 Right, quick, quick, quick. Come on. 765 00:25:03,959 --> 00:25:04,919 Right, move in, move in, move in. 766 00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:07,500 [Romesh] The best thing that could happen 767 00:25:07,583 --> 00:25:09,383 is Mario Lopez turns around and goes "Oh, my gosh. 768 00:25:09,458 --> 00:25:11,458 Look at this banner. This is incredible." 769 00:25:11,542 --> 00:25:13,462 [man] Worst-case scenario? 770 00:25:13,542 --> 00:25:16,462 We're arrested and deported. 771 00:25:16,542 --> 00:25:19,632 And three, two, one. Applause! 772 00:25:19,709 --> 00:25:22,289 [Romesh] Put it up. Put it up! 773 00:25:22,375 --> 00:25:23,325 [Mario] Hey, everyone. Welcome to Extra. 774 00:25:23,417 --> 00:25:24,077 I'm Mario Lopez... 775 00:25:24,166 --> 00:25:26,706 [Rags grumbling] 776 00:25:26,792 --> 00:25:28,462 ...speaking out for the very first time 777 00:25:28,542 --> 00:25:30,042 [Romesh] Hold it, hold it, hold it. You got it? 778 00:25:30,125 --> 00:25:32,535 ...and how Oprah helped her survive... 779 00:25:32,625 --> 00:25:35,495 [Rags] And down on the ground. 780 00:25:35,583 --> 00:25:37,543 [man] Guys, you got to put the sign down, guys. 781 00:25:37,625 --> 00:25:38,705 [Mario] Who are those dudes? 782 00:25:38,792 --> 00:25:40,422 Hey, who are these guys? 783 00:25:40,500 --> 00:25:43,000 [Romesh] Why Rags 784 00:25:43,083 --> 00:25:44,963 got a banner that size is beyond me. 785 00:25:45,041 --> 00:25:47,081 - Rags? - Yeah, on the ground. 786 00:25:47,166 --> 00:25:49,576 - Pull it up, man. - Why is it this big? 787 00:25:49,667 --> 00:25:51,577 First of all, it's impossible to get up. 788 00:25:51,667 --> 00:25:53,627 Second of all, the information 789 00:25:53,709 --> 00:25:55,249 about the actual show is on the back of the banner. 790 00:25:55,333 --> 00:25:56,673 Insane. 791 00:25:56,750 --> 00:25:59,380 [man] Guys, you got to put the sign down, guys. 792 00:25:59,458 --> 00:26:00,418 Look, look, I'll just show you quickly, then we'll go. 793 00:26:00,500 --> 00:26:02,750 "World's greatest..." 794 00:26:02,834 --> 00:26:05,214 "World's greatest inspirational comic." 795 00:26:05,291 --> 00:26:06,581 Oh, okay. 796 00:26:06,667 --> 00:26:08,787 [Romesh] Mario Lopez looks around, 797 00:26:08,875 --> 00:26:10,495 and even he said, 798 00:26:10,583 --> 00:26:11,793 "Why are you taking so long to get the banner up?" 799 00:26:11,875 --> 00:26:13,705 Y'all got to be quicker with that 800 00:26:13,792 --> 00:26:15,712 if you want to make an impact-- that's not--Oh, God. 801 00:26:15,792 --> 00:26:17,132 [Mario] Whatever it is, I don't want to see it now. 802 00:26:17,208 --> 00:26:18,998 That is something I did not anticipate-- 803 00:26:19,083 --> 00:26:20,583 him going, "If you're going to do that, mate, 804 00:26:20,667 --> 00:26:22,417 don't be so shit at it." 805 00:26:22,500 --> 00:26:24,670 - [man] You got to go. - [man] We're shooting a show! 806 00:26:24,750 --> 00:26:25,460 [Rags] I mean, it's not hurting anyone, is it? 807 00:26:25,542 --> 00:26:28,042 They're all struggling. 808 00:26:28,125 --> 00:26:29,575 [man] Whatever you're doing, you can't have it here. 809 00:26:29,667 --> 00:26:31,127 [woman] Sir, you got to put it down. 810 00:26:31,208 --> 00:26:32,628 [woman] Put the sign down. They're shooting a show. 811 00:26:32,709 --> 00:26:34,879 [woman] Oh, yeah, the microphone. 812 00:26:34,959 --> 00:26:36,459 - You got to go. - Oh? 813 00:26:36,542 --> 00:26:37,962 We can't have it in the shot. We're shooting a show. 814 00:26:38,041 --> 00:26:40,711 - [Romesh] Come on. - [Rags] Why are you so fucking 815 00:26:40,792 --> 00:26:41,252 - pissed off at this? - [Romesh] That was a disaster. 816 00:26:41,333 --> 00:26:43,883 Man, it wasn't. 817 00:26:43,959 --> 00:26:44,879 What's it even say? 818 00:26:44,959 --> 00:26:45,919 Put it-- "The next big star 819 00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:47,960 - in Hollywood." - [Rags] Let's pull it out. 820 00:26:48,041 --> 00:26:49,041 Let some more people see it here. 821 00:26:49,125 --> 00:26:51,535 [Romesh] I mean, the content of the banner-- 822 00:26:51,625 --> 00:26:53,955 he just took things that Poletus said 823 00:26:54,041 --> 00:26:56,791 and used those in the banner. 824 00:26:56,875 --> 00:26:58,125 Why? 825 00:26:58,208 --> 00:26:59,498 See, it looks bloody nice, right? 826 00:26:59,583 --> 00:27:00,963 #FuckTravel? 827 00:27:01,041 --> 00:27:03,081 - What? - #FuckTravel? Why? 828 00:27:03,166 --> 00:27:04,706 Well, that's the hashtag you're gonna use, buddy. 829 00:27:04,792 --> 00:27:07,882 How are they gonna show that on Extra? 830 00:27:07,959 --> 00:27:09,789 Why wouldn't they? 831 00:27:09,875 --> 00:27:10,495 [Romesh] I started this week thinking it's great 832 00:27:10,583 --> 00:27:13,333 to have my uncle around. 833 00:27:13,417 --> 00:27:14,827 He thinks outside the box 834 00:27:14,917 --> 00:27:15,577 Do you know what I mean? He's got a lot of energy. 835 00:27:15,667 --> 00:27:17,957 He's got a lot of enthusiasm. 836 00:27:18,041 --> 00:27:19,631 I think we've got an opportunity here 837 00:27:19,709 --> 00:27:20,829 - to bloody open it up again-- - No, no, no. 838 00:27:20,917 --> 00:27:21,917 No, I'm not opening it up again. 839 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:23,630 Let's just go, please. 840 00:27:23,709 --> 00:27:24,749 [Romesh] And now I'm sort of concerned 841 00:27:24,834 --> 00:27:25,834 about having him here, 842 00:27:25,917 --> 00:27:27,327 because he has insane ideas, 843 00:27:27,417 --> 00:27:28,827 his enthusiasm is irritating, 844 00:27:28,917 --> 00:27:31,327 and he just doesn't know when to give up. 845 00:27:31,417 --> 00:27:32,667 [Romesh] The slight cloud to the silver lining of this 846 00:27:32,750 --> 00:27:35,420 is I sent Leesa the details of the house, 847 00:27:35,500 --> 00:27:37,170 and it turns out she hates it, 848 00:27:37,250 --> 00:27:40,540 and I'm staring down the barrel of Leesa and the kids arriving 849 00:27:40,625 --> 00:27:43,125 to stay with me and Rags in one motel room. 850 00:27:43,208 --> 00:27:45,578 So... 851 00:27:45,667 --> 00:27:47,377 I'm probably gonna get a divorce. 852 00:27:47,458 --> 00:27:50,038 ♪ Terminator funk ♪ 853 00:27:50,125 --> 00:27:52,535 ♪ Terminator funk ♪ 854 00:27:52,625 --> 00:27:55,035 ♪ Terminator funk ♪ 855 00:27:55,125 --> 00:27:57,375 ♪ Terminator funk ♪ 856 00:27:57,458 --> 00:27:59,248 ♪ Yo, as the planet spins round and around ♪ 857 00:27:59,333 --> 00:28:00,753 ♪ Turn the shit up ♪ 858 00:28:00,834 --> 00:28:02,794 ♪ Let it bump loud in the crowd ♪ 859 00:28:02,917 --> 00:28:05,077 ♪ The unknown specimen with African cells ♪ 860 00:28:05,125 --> 00:28:07,455 ♪ Got everybody counting sheep straight slapping themselves ♪ 861 00:28:07,500 --> 00:28:09,630 ♪ The sound boy burial's already begun ♪ 862 00:28:09,709 --> 00:28:11,079 ♪ The game needs a funk rebirth, let it be done, son ♪ 863 00:28:11,166 --> 00:28:15,036 ♪ One nation under a gun, under the thumb ♪ 864 00:28:15,083 --> 00:28:17,963 ♪ Some of us know the time while the others get dumb ♪ 865 00:28:18,041 --> 00:28:20,961 [bright tone]