1 00:00:01,521 --> 00:00:03,646 [bright tone] 2 00:00:06,479 --> 00:00:09,312 ♪ hip-hop music ♪ 3 00:00:09,396 --> 00:00:10,730 ♪ Yeah, baby, thicken it up ♪ 4 00:00:10,813 --> 00:00:13,771 ♪ We can take it real slow, we can quicken it up ♪ 5 00:00:13,855 --> 00:00:14,438 ♪ I wanna witness you spinning your shit ♪ 6 00:00:14,521 --> 00:00:16,563 ♪ And picking it up ♪ 7 00:00:16,646 --> 00:00:18,021 ♪ Take you to that special place ♪ 8 00:00:18,104 --> 00:00:18,896 ♪ And we can figure it out ♪ 9 00:00:18,980 --> 00:00:20,563 Have we got crumpets? 10 00:00:20,646 --> 00:00:21,479 - Yes, just doing them. - Yes, yes, yes, yes. 11 00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:24,187 I've been sent a thing from production, 12 00:00:24,271 --> 00:00:26,604 getting feedback from, like, a focus group. 13 00:00:26,688 --> 00:00:27,646 Is it good feedback? 14 00:00:27,730 --> 00:00:28,813 Well, let me see. 15 00:00:28,896 --> 00:00:29,938 [man] Hey, everybody. 16 00:00:30,021 --> 00:00:32,229 Thanks for coming to help us with this focus group. 17 00:00:32,312 --> 00:00:34,563 What you just saw was some footage 18 00:00:34,646 --> 00:00:36,688 from an upcoming documentary series. 19 00:00:36,771 --> 00:00:37,688 What do you think, ladies? 20 00:00:37,771 --> 00:00:40,354 Having an accent is-is kind of different 21 00:00:40,438 --> 00:00:41,521 from all the other comedians that you see. 22 00:00:41,604 --> 00:00:44,062 [man] It's like a charming British accent, 23 00:00:44,146 --> 00:00:45,688 so it makes you, like, just laugh. 24 00:00:45,771 --> 00:00:47,062 - I'm like, all right. - Yeah, I liked him. 25 00:00:47,146 --> 00:00:48,563 - That's really good. - See? 26 00:00:48,646 --> 00:00:49,646 [man] How would you describe his mom? 27 00:00:49,730 --> 00:00:52,187 [woman] She's more natural, down-to-earth. 28 00:00:52,271 --> 00:00:53,229 I don't know if they gave us enough of her. 29 00:00:53,271 --> 00:00:55,604 [Leesa] They're talking about you. 30 00:00:55,688 --> 00:00:57,563 She's just as funny as he is. 31 00:00:57,646 --> 00:00:59,438 - [Theo] Did you hear that? - Mm-hmm. 32 00:00:59,521 --> 00:01:01,229 [Theo] "She's as funny as he is." 33 00:01:01,312 --> 00:01:03,563 The way he talked to his mom bothered me. 34 00:01:03,646 --> 00:01:06,980 I see him being like a-- kind of like a jerk to her. 35 00:01:07,062 --> 00:01:08,813 I thought he was really disrespectful to his mom. 36 00:01:08,896 --> 00:01:10,604 He's just kind of being a jerk. 37 00:01:10,688 --> 00:01:13,813 I've-I've been called a jerk about six times in this so far. 38 00:01:13,896 --> 00:01:15,771 [man] What about him and his wife? 39 00:01:15,855 --> 00:01:17,271 - He was kind of a jerk. - [man] He's what? 40 00:01:17,354 --> 00:01:18,604 I said he's kind of a jerk. 41 00:01:18,688 --> 00:01:19,604 That's twice just from that. 42 00:01:19,688 --> 00:01:21,896 If my husband talked to me that way, 43 00:01:21,980 --> 00:01:23,438 we would not be together right now. 44 00:01:23,521 --> 00:01:25,271 Surprised you got a husband. 45 00:01:25,354 --> 00:01:27,187 [woman] Give us a redeeming quality. 46 00:01:27,271 --> 00:01:28,896 Ooh. 47 00:01:28,980 --> 00:01:30,813 We're in trouble. 48 00:01:30,896 --> 00:01:32,271 Uh, the feedback 49 00:01:32,354 --> 00:01:35,062 has not been great, I don't think. 50 00:01:35,146 --> 00:01:36,438 - Why is this guy interesting? - I don't have an answer. 51 00:01:36,521 --> 00:01:38,396 I don't think he is interesting, 52 00:01:38,479 --> 00:01:40,229 and I-I wouldn't watch it. 53 00:01:40,312 --> 00:01:41,271 [man] I don't know, just-he's just boring. 54 00:01:41,354 --> 00:01:43,187 [man] So he's boring to us? 55 00:01:43,271 --> 00:01:44,771 Why would I watch him yell at his wife 56 00:01:44,855 --> 00:01:46,062 'cause she's trying to help him do this? 57 00:01:46,146 --> 00:01:47,312 I won't. I could care less. 58 00:01:47,396 --> 00:01:49,771 And that's why he's boring to us. 59 00:01:49,855 --> 00:01:51,229 [Romesh] It's a form of torture. 60 00:01:51,312 --> 00:01:52,688 It's like a modern form of media, 61 00:01:52,771 --> 00:01:54,354 entertainment industry torture. 62 00:01:54,438 --> 00:01:56,521 [Ben] Well, the production just thought 63 00:01:56,604 --> 00:01:58,271 it'd be good for you to get some feedback on the show. 64 00:01:58,354 --> 00:02:01,271 [Romesh] This show is me, 65 00:02:01,354 --> 00:02:02,730 so when they say... 66 00:02:02,813 --> 00:02:03,896 when you get your feedback, 67 00:02:03,980 --> 00:02:07,146 that feedback is, "You need to improve as a human." 68 00:02:07,187 --> 00:02:08,813 The thing I don't get, 69 00:02:08,896 --> 00:02:11,896 like, "grumpy, miserable jerk," actually, I get. 70 00:02:11,980 --> 00:02:14,104 "Boring"? Am I boring? 71 00:02:16,980 --> 00:02:18,438 Um... 72 00:02:18,521 --> 00:02:22,771 Rom, not a word mentioned about me, mate. 73 00:02:22,855 --> 00:02:24,312 I think I'm not in the fucking show. 74 00:02:24,396 --> 00:02:25,896 They didn't mention a thing about me. 75 00:02:25,980 --> 00:02:27,271 Sorry, are you here to be in a show, 76 00:02:27,354 --> 00:02:28,855 or are you here to help me out? 77 00:02:28,938 --> 00:02:30,021 Because your motivations seem all over the place. 78 00:02:30,104 --> 00:02:31,646 Forget about it, man. 79 00:02:31,730 --> 00:02:33,396 - What's up with you? - I think this stinks. 80 00:02:33,479 --> 00:02:34,813 [Romesh] Do you know what I can't believe? 81 00:02:34,896 --> 00:02:35,896 - I've been slagged off. - Yeah. 82 00:02:35,980 --> 00:02:38,479 I've been told that I'm out of order to my mum. 83 00:02:38,563 --> 00:02:40,312 I've been told I'm a jerk to my wife. 84 00:02:40,396 --> 00:02:42,271 They've got no interest in watching the thing. 85 00:02:42,354 --> 00:02:43,604 And I'm thinking, Oh, I wonder what he's gonna say 86 00:02:43,688 --> 00:02:45,229 to soothe my conscience. 87 00:02:45,312 --> 00:02:47,479 "I wasn't mentioned, mate." It's not about you, Rags. 88 00:02:47,563 --> 00:02:51,104 Rom, I just wanted some feedback, man, okay? 89 00:02:51,187 --> 00:02:54,604 Maybe lose the topknot, yeah? 90 00:02:54,688 --> 00:02:57,646 You could also lose some diva attitude as well. 91 00:02:57,730 --> 00:02:59,354 [laughter] 92 00:02:59,438 --> 00:03:02,479 All right, yeah, so you're all gonna gang up now and... 93 00:03:02,521 --> 00:03:04,646 [laughter] 94 00:03:04,688 --> 00:03:07,730 ♪ piano arpeggios ♪ 95 00:03:07,813 --> 00:03:12,396 ♪♪♪ 96 00:03:12,479 --> 00:03:14,312 ♪ playful music ♪ 97 00:03:14,396 --> 00:03:16,938 [Ben] Rom, um, how's it going? 98 00:03:17,021 --> 00:03:19,354 Um, yeah, good. 99 00:03:19,438 --> 00:03:22,229 I'm, uh, searching my name on Twitter 100 00:03:22,312 --> 00:03:25,104 to desperately find positive comments about myself. 101 00:03:25,187 --> 00:03:26,479 It's a bit sad, but I can't tell you 102 00:03:26,563 --> 00:03:28,062 it's the first time I've done it. 103 00:03:28,146 --> 00:03:29,021 - Hello, Mum. - Oh. 104 00:03:29,104 --> 00:03:32,563 Um, I've got a little surprise for you. 105 00:03:32,646 --> 00:03:34,813 [Ben] So the production have actually pulled a few strings, 106 00:03:34,896 --> 00:03:37,104 and they know that you and your mum's favorite film 107 00:03:37,187 --> 00:03:37,938 is Coming to America. 108 00:03:38,021 --> 00:03:38,980 Mm. 109 00:03:39,062 --> 00:03:41,771 [Ben] And they have got you a meeting with-- 110 00:03:41,855 --> 00:03:43,062 Eddie Murphy? 111 00:03:43,146 --> 00:03:44,229 [Ben] Uh, Arsenio Hall. 112 00:03:44,312 --> 00:03:46,229 That's great. 113 00:03:46,312 --> 00:03:48,104 Hold on, why have they sorted out a meeting 114 00:03:48,187 --> 00:03:49,229 with Arsenio Hall? 115 00:03:49,312 --> 00:03:50,187 You're joking, eh? 116 00:03:50,271 --> 00:03:51,730 No, we're meeting him today. 117 00:03:51,813 --> 00:03:52,396 - We're gonna go-- - Are we? 118 00:03:52,479 --> 00:03:54,479 - Yeah. - Oh, my God. 119 00:03:54,563 --> 00:03:55,646 Sorry, I thought this show was just 120 00:03:55,730 --> 00:03:57,187 documenting what we're doing. 121 00:03:57,271 --> 00:03:58,730 I didn't realize it was like Make-A-Wish. 122 00:03:58,813 --> 00:04:01,730 Why are we suddenly being delivered this thing? 123 00:04:01,813 --> 00:04:05,229 [Ben] Well, I think-I think, you-you know, they, uh... 124 00:04:05,312 --> 00:04:06,521 - I'm so excited. - Are you? 125 00:04:06,604 --> 00:04:07,896 Honest to God, Rom. Yes, yes, yes. 126 00:04:07,980 --> 00:04:09,312 - Are you? - I like these things. 127 00:04:09,396 --> 00:04:10,813 - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah. 128 00:04:10,896 --> 00:04:12,855 If I could meet Oprah as well, I would love it. 129 00:04:12,938 --> 00:04:14,938 Yeah, sure, I think she's gonna give us a lift there. 130 00:04:15,021 --> 00:04:16,604 - Yeah? - Yeah, no. 131 00:04:16,688 --> 00:04:18,938 - All right, no? - No. 132 00:04:19,021 --> 00:04:19,938 [Ben] Also, you're going wine tasting. 133 00:04:20,021 --> 00:04:22,229 I mean... 134 00:04:22,312 --> 00:04:25,062 ♪ upbeat electronic music ♪ 135 00:04:25,146 --> 00:04:27,896 ♪♪♪ 136 00:04:27,980 --> 00:04:29,604 [Romesh] Are you gonna get drunk? 137 00:04:29,688 --> 00:04:31,855 No, I'll try my best not to get drunk. 138 00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:33,104 - How about that? - Okay. 139 00:04:33,187 --> 00:04:36,604 Oh, this is him, this is him, this is him, this is him. 140 00:04:36,688 --> 00:04:37,813 Holy shit. 141 00:04:37,896 --> 00:04:40,855 Eh-hey. [chuckles] 142 00:04:40,938 --> 00:04:42,271 - [Shanthi] Hello. - Hi. 143 00:04:42,354 --> 00:04:43,771 - Shanthi. - Yes. 144 00:04:43,855 --> 00:04:45,312 Oh, gosh, God bless you. 145 00:04:45,396 --> 00:04:46,146 Oh, you don't know how happy I am 146 00:04:46,229 --> 00:04:48,479 to see you, my God. 147 00:04:48,563 --> 00:04:50,312 Am I saying your name right? Shanthi? 148 00:04:50,396 --> 00:04:51,604 Yes, you have. 149 00:04:51,688 --> 00:04:53,146 Such a pleasure to meet you, man. 150 00:04:53,229 --> 00:04:54,980 Does he get his sense of humor from you? 151 00:04:55,062 --> 00:04:56,062 - You're gonna tell me... - Oh, okay. 152 00:04:56,146 --> 00:04:59,646 ...after talking to me, and you can judge that. 153 00:04:59,730 --> 00:05:00,438 I'm looking forward to today. 154 00:05:00,521 --> 00:05:03,146 [Romesh] But I'm not an idiot. 155 00:05:03,229 --> 00:05:04,813 This has been set up to the direct results 156 00:05:04,896 --> 00:05:06,271 of that focus group. 157 00:05:06,354 --> 00:05:08,771 You didn't even have the forethought 158 00:05:08,855 --> 00:05:09,646 to put some distance between it. 159 00:05:09,730 --> 00:05:12,771 We're literally... this is happening. 160 00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:14,604 ♪ lounge music ♪ 161 00:05:14,688 --> 00:05:16,604 [Arsenio] So, Shanthi, what do you do? 162 00:05:16,730 --> 00:05:18,146 I work for the post office. 163 00:05:18,229 --> 00:05:20,396 I've been working there for 25 years. 164 00:05:20,479 --> 00:05:23,187 When my son become millionaire, I can... 165 00:05:23,271 --> 00:05:24,771 That's her long-term financial plan. 166 00:05:24,855 --> 00:05:27,771 It's the best feeling in the world when you call your mom 167 00:05:27,855 --> 00:05:30,146 and say, "You don't have to work again." 168 00:05:30,229 --> 00:05:32,563 And your mama start cussing people out at the job. 169 00:05:32,646 --> 00:05:34,563 "What? You want me to do what? I ain't doing shit. 170 00:05:34,646 --> 00:05:38,688 'Cause Romi's a millionaire, motherfucker." 171 00:05:38,771 --> 00:05:40,187 I might do that. 172 00:05:40,271 --> 00:05:42,771 [laughter] 173 00:05:42,855 --> 00:05:46,146 [Arsenio] Wow, that one has an ass like Amber Rose, 174 00:05:46,229 --> 00:05:47,271 that one right there, that... 175 00:05:47,354 --> 00:05:48,187 ...all white and muscular. 176 00:05:48,271 --> 00:05:52,271 [laughter] 177 00:05:52,354 --> 00:05:53,563 [Shanthi] Oh, isn't it beautiful? 178 00:05:53,646 --> 00:05:55,312 [Arsenio] That doesn't even look real. 179 00:05:55,396 --> 00:05:56,771 I mean, if somebody painted it, 180 00:05:56,855 --> 00:05:59,813 you would say, "Ah, no clouds look like that." 181 00:05:59,896 --> 00:06:00,479 Gorgeous. 182 00:06:00,563 --> 00:06:01,563 [Shanthi] I love red wine. 183 00:06:01,646 --> 00:06:05,312 I think wine purists drink red. 184 00:06:05,396 --> 00:06:06,646 Right, yeah, sure. 185 00:06:06,730 --> 00:06:08,229 When you meet a wine expert, 186 00:06:08,312 --> 00:06:10,896 or someone who really, really knows wine, 187 00:06:10,980 --> 00:06:12,479 they don't want white. 188 00:06:12,563 --> 00:06:14,271 Yeah, red is the one. 189 00:06:14,354 --> 00:06:16,104 - Let's toast to the one. - Yes, one. 190 00:06:16,187 --> 00:06:18,229 [Arsenio] Yes. 191 00:06:18,312 --> 00:06:19,730 So how's it going with, uh... 192 00:06:19,813 --> 00:06:22,104 what-where is Coming to America 2 at? 193 00:06:22,187 --> 00:06:24,646 I'm hoping that the second draft 194 00:06:24,730 --> 00:06:28,104 will be finished by Christmas, maybe? 195 00:06:28,187 --> 00:06:29,604 So do you have, like- like, for example, 196 00:06:29,688 --> 00:06:31,521 will they come to you for this, 197 00:06:31,604 --> 00:06:33,896 for the sequel for casting decisions and stuff like that? 198 00:06:33,980 --> 00:06:35,479 Wh-why? 199 00:06:35,563 --> 00:06:36,396 It would be amazing to get, like, a tiny... 200 00:06:36,479 --> 00:06:38,104 do you know what I mean? 201 00:06:38,187 --> 00:06:41,312 It-it-it's too early to talk to me about casting 202 00:06:41,396 --> 00:06:42,396 for Coming to America. 203 00:06:42,479 --> 00:06:44,896 It's-it's too early. 204 00:06:44,980 --> 00:06:46,438 Yeah, no, I get it. Sorry, I'm sorry. 205 00:06:46,521 --> 00:06:47,855 [Arsenio] Mom, does that make sense? 206 00:06:47,938 --> 00:06:49,062 - It does, it does. - Yeah, I know, I know. 207 00:06:49,146 --> 00:06:51,187 But I'm just saying, if it came up, do you know what I mean? 208 00:06:51,271 --> 00:06:52,896 Let's give it some time. 209 00:06:52,980 --> 00:06:53,771 ♪♪♪ 210 00:06:53,855 --> 00:06:56,354 [Arsenio] Boy. Are you loving this? 211 00:06:56,438 --> 00:06:57,771 [Shanthi] I love this, yes. 212 00:06:57,855 --> 00:06:58,688 You've stopped dating, right? 213 00:06:58,771 --> 00:07:03,021 I haven't had date for five years now. 214 00:07:03,104 --> 00:07:05,813 Do you still, um-do you still go up and stuff, like... 215 00:07:05,896 --> 00:07:08,021 Oh, yeah, as a matter of fact, I started doing stand-up again. 216 00:07:08,104 --> 00:07:09,187 I had stopped doing stand-up for a while, 217 00:07:09,271 --> 00:07:10,938 and now I'm doing it again. 218 00:07:11,021 --> 00:07:12,563 I was trying-I'm trying to get up as much as I can over here, 219 00:07:12,646 --> 00:07:14,813 do you know what I mean, but in the UK, 220 00:07:14,896 --> 00:07:16,521 I can get gigs, like, easy, 221 00:07:16,604 --> 00:07:18,229 and then over here it's been a bit of an adjustment 222 00:07:18,312 --> 00:07:20,980 because... 223 00:07:21,062 --> 00:07:22,604 ...like, a lot of these places won't let me go. 224 00:07:22,688 --> 00:07:25,730 Like, I went to The Comedy Store... 225 00:07:25,813 --> 00:07:27,771 ...and tried to sort of get some time, 226 00:07:27,813 --> 00:07:29,771 and they said they need someone to vouch for me, 227 00:07:29,813 --> 00:07:30,312 like, just someone to put in a good word, 228 00:07:30,396 --> 00:07:32,229 do you know what I mean? 229 00:07:32,271 --> 00:07:33,771 Yeah, yeah. 230 00:07:33,855 --> 00:07:36,312 Like, maybe, let's talk about it later? 231 00:07:37,229 --> 00:07:38,521 Yeah, sure. 232 00:07:38,604 --> 00:07:41,938 - Yeah, sure. - [Arsenio] Great. 233 00:07:42,021 --> 00:07:44,563 I couldn't believe when they told me you were 234 00:07:44,646 --> 00:07:46,104 a Coming to America fan. 235 00:07:46,187 --> 00:07:47,438 [laughter] 236 00:07:47,521 --> 00:07:48,813 I'm gonna go for a cigarette or something. 237 00:07:48,896 --> 00:07:50,396 - [Arsenio] You smoke? - Yeah. 238 00:07:50,479 --> 00:07:51,438 [Shanthi] That's no good. 239 00:07:51,521 --> 00:07:54,312 Even Mom knows that, man. 240 00:07:54,396 --> 00:07:57,479 [birds cawing distantly] 241 00:07:58,187 --> 00:08:00,396 I'll see you guys in a bit. 242 00:08:00,479 --> 00:08:02,312 [sneakers squeaking] 243 00:08:02,396 --> 00:08:03,813 His shoes are squeaking. 244 00:08:03,896 --> 00:08:05,479 - [laughs] - Did you hear his shoe? 245 00:08:05,563 --> 00:08:06,438 When he walked away, his shoes went... 246 00:08:06,521 --> 00:08:09,563 [imitating squeaking] 247 00:08:09,646 --> 00:08:11,479 Maybe he's not wearing socks. 248 00:08:11,563 --> 00:08:13,146 ♪♪♪ 249 00:08:13,229 --> 00:08:13,688 [Arsenio] This wine is too good. 250 00:08:13,771 --> 00:08:15,813 Too good. [laughs] 251 00:08:15,896 --> 00:08:17,104 He's gone now. I'ma use his chair. 252 00:08:17,187 --> 00:08:20,229 Could've been like this, me and you, all day, right? 253 00:08:20,312 --> 00:08:22,146 - All day, of course. - Yes, yes, yes. 254 00:08:22,229 --> 00:08:22,938 [Ben] Would you say that Arsenio 255 00:08:23,021 --> 00:08:25,563 was flirting with your mum? 256 00:08:25,646 --> 00:08:28,896 I think, had I not been there, 257 00:08:28,980 --> 00:08:31,146 they would've finished one of the bottles of red 258 00:08:31,229 --> 00:08:32,646 and just had it on the table. 259 00:08:32,730 --> 00:08:35,021 [both] Mmm. 260 00:08:35,104 --> 00:08:36,646 What are we doing tomorrow? What have you got planned? 261 00:08:36,730 --> 00:08:38,646 Are we going ice-skating with Julia Roberts? 262 00:08:38,730 --> 00:08:39,688 Pottery with Kevin Hart? 263 00:08:39,771 --> 00:08:42,730 Tomorrow, I'm doing my thing. 264 00:08:42,813 --> 00:08:44,396 I don't want any rocking up 265 00:08:44,479 --> 00:08:46,187 and saying, "Oh, just to let you know, 266 00:08:46,271 --> 00:08:48,479 we decided to-to send you on an intensive Latin course 267 00:08:48,563 --> 00:08:49,855 with Peter Dinklage. 268 00:08:49,938 --> 00:08:52,688 [Ben] Hey, Rom, can I just grab a quick, uh, 269 00:08:52,771 --> 00:08:54,688 word with both of you? 270 00:08:55,896 --> 00:08:59,855 Sha-uh-Shanthi, how was-you-just... 271 00:09:01,730 --> 00:09:02,604 - How was-- - [laughs] 272 00:09:02,688 --> 00:09:05,229 Uh, how was-how was that for you? 273 00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:07,855 Oh, I really enjoyed his company. 274 00:09:07,938 --> 00:09:09,855 - And, um-- - What are you doing? 275 00:09:09,938 --> 00:09:11,688 What is this? 276 00:09:11,771 --> 00:09:12,938 [Ben] Well, it's just-it's just this was Shanthi's-- 277 00:09:13,021 --> 00:09:16,104 So she's doing a fucking face-the-camera now? 278 00:09:16,187 --> 00:09:19,521 [Ben] Any thoughts about your experience, about the day? 279 00:09:19,604 --> 00:09:20,938 When I met him, 280 00:09:21,021 --> 00:09:23,104 I found him very funny. 281 00:09:23,187 --> 00:09:23,771 Very funny. 282 00:09:23,855 --> 00:09:26,479 And I-I enjoyed his company. 283 00:09:26,563 --> 00:09:28,187 So I thought, uh, yeah. 284 00:09:28,271 --> 00:09:32,062 This is one of the worst fucking things I've ever seen. 285 00:09:32,146 --> 00:09:34,521 - Shall we just go, please? - Okay. 286 00:09:37,354 --> 00:09:40,646 Did Arsenio get his dick out? 287 00:09:40,730 --> 00:09:42,354 I feel like slapping you, honest to God. 288 00:09:42,438 --> 00:09:44,146 [chuckles] 289 00:09:46,688 --> 00:09:49,563 ♪ hip-hop music ♪ 290 00:09:49,646 --> 00:09:51,062 ♪♪♪ 291 00:09:51,146 --> 00:09:54,062 ♪ I bet you've never seen a cooler person ♪ 292 00:09:54,146 --> 00:09:55,312 - ♪ It's James Bond ♪ - ♪ Who? ♪ 293 00:09:55,396 --> 00:09:57,229 ♪ The stupid version ♪ 294 00:09:57,312 --> 00:09:59,062 ♪ No good at what he does, so he can't be earning ♪ 295 00:09:59,146 --> 00:10:00,521 ♪ Do you have a day job? ♪ 296 00:10:00,604 --> 00:10:02,855 ♪ What bar do you work in? ♪ 297 00:10:03,896 --> 00:10:05,438 [Romesh] Be honest with me. Be genuine with me. 298 00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:06,521 Do you think I'm interesting? 299 00:10:06,604 --> 00:10:09,563 No, I mean, am I boring? Is what I'm getting at. 300 00:10:09,646 --> 00:10:11,563 Sometimes, yes. 301 00:10:11,646 --> 00:10:13,187 Jesus Christ. 302 00:10:13,271 --> 00:10:17,229 Have you done anything to make it interesting? 303 00:10:17,312 --> 00:10:19,479 Have you done anything? 304 00:10:19,563 --> 00:10:21,730 Other than introducing your mum to this... 305 00:10:21,813 --> 00:10:23,479 what's-his-hall? 306 00:10:23,563 --> 00:10:25,104 - Arsenio. - Arsenio Hall. 307 00:10:25,187 --> 00:10:26,771 What is Arsenio Hall? 308 00:10:26,855 --> 00:10:28,104 - "What is Arsenio Hall"? - "What is Arsenio"-- 309 00:10:28,187 --> 00:10:30,438 Arsenio Hall is this lovely, ornate, 310 00:10:30,521 --> 00:10:31,980 sort of 19th-century hall 311 00:10:32,062 --> 00:10:33,521 in the middle of Los Angeles. 312 00:10:33,604 --> 00:10:36,688 - And you guys went there? - [both] Yeah. 313 00:10:36,771 --> 00:10:38,271 Have you heard of it, Arsenio Hall? 314 00:10:38,354 --> 00:10:40,604 I've heard of it, but why wasn't I invited? 315 00:10:40,688 --> 00:10:42,771 I didn't think it was a type of hall that you'd want to visit. 316 00:10:42,855 --> 00:10:44,271 I didn't think you would like going to halls. 317 00:10:44,354 --> 00:10:45,438 How do you know that I don't like-- 318 00:10:45,521 --> 00:10:46,312 All right, fine. [stammers] 319 00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:47,855 It's still there. 320 00:10:47,938 --> 00:10:49,521 If you want to go see Arsenio Hall, I'll take you. 321 00:10:49,604 --> 00:10:50,730 Mum loved the hall. 322 00:10:50,813 --> 00:10:53,021 I-I did, I-I really... 323 00:10:53,104 --> 00:10:54,730 liked the hall. 324 00:10:54,813 --> 00:10:56,396 Yeah, it felt like Mum really wanted to explore the hall. 325 00:10:56,479 --> 00:10:59,271 [laughs] No. 326 00:10:59,354 --> 00:11:03,604 I thought she was gonna get on top of the hall at one point. 327 00:11:03,688 --> 00:11:06,438 ♪ hip-hop music ♪ 328 00:11:06,521 --> 00:11:08,104 ♪♪♪ 329 00:11:08,229 --> 00:11:10,062 ♪ Long way down from the tenth floor ♪ 330 00:11:10,146 --> 00:11:13,062 ♪ But I couldn't be further from M4 ♪ 331 00:11:13,146 --> 00:11:15,062 ♪ I'm on all fours, head held high up ♪ 332 00:11:15,146 --> 00:11:17,855 ♪ Galloping around town, looking like a centaur ♪ 333 00:11:17,938 --> 00:11:20,604 [Romesh] So while Rags and Mum hang out, 334 00:11:20,688 --> 00:11:21,938 I have organized for Leesa and I 335 00:11:22,062 --> 00:11:23,271 to have a little sort of date day. 336 00:11:23,354 --> 00:11:26,896 [Ben] Obviously, this is a reaction to the focus group 337 00:11:26,980 --> 00:11:30,604 saying you weren't very nice to Leesa. 338 00:11:30,688 --> 00:11:32,563 No. 339 00:11:32,646 --> 00:11:34,271 [Ben] So the focus groups say you should be nicer 340 00:11:34,354 --> 00:11:36,730 to your family and should be more exciting. 341 00:11:36,813 --> 00:11:38,980 The next day, you're on horseback. 342 00:11:42,021 --> 00:11:44,771 ♪ exciting music ♪ 343 00:11:44,855 --> 00:11:46,271 [Leesa] I was very surprised 344 00:11:46,354 --> 00:11:48,229 that you wanted to go horse riding. 345 00:11:48,312 --> 00:11:49,938 I didn't know you were into horse riding. 346 00:11:50,021 --> 00:11:51,187 [Romesh] Um, I'm not really. 347 00:11:51,271 --> 00:11:53,646 I just thought it might be something you might be into. 348 00:11:53,730 --> 00:11:55,396 - [Romesh] Obviously not. - [Leesa] No. 349 00:11:55,479 --> 00:11:56,855 - No? - Not really. 350 00:11:56,938 --> 00:11:59,062 I haven't ridden a horse since I was eight. 351 00:11:59,146 --> 00:12:00,271 Just thought this might be something 352 00:12:00,354 --> 00:12:01,187 to do with the focus group. 353 00:12:01,271 --> 00:12:03,521 This is not because of the focus group. 354 00:12:03,604 --> 00:12:05,104 [Leesa] Okay. You just have to take everything 355 00:12:05,187 --> 00:12:06,146 with a pinch of salt and just not worry about it. 356 00:12:06,229 --> 00:12:08,354 [Romesh] Well, it's easier said than done. 357 00:12:08,438 --> 00:12:09,521 They weren't calling you a jerk. 358 00:12:09,604 --> 00:12:10,730 [laughs] 359 00:12:10,813 --> 00:12:12,980 - [Romesh] Ta-da. - [Leesa] Wow. 360 00:12:13,062 --> 00:12:14,938 - Nice, right? - Very romantic. 361 00:12:15,021 --> 00:12:15,813 [Romesh] I got healthy crap that you like. 362 00:12:15,896 --> 00:12:18,062 [Leesa] I'm very impressed. 363 00:12:18,146 --> 00:12:20,229 - [Romesh] Huh, yeah? - [Leesa] Yeah. 364 00:12:20,312 --> 00:12:22,938 - Cheers. - Cheers. Thank you. 365 00:12:23,021 --> 00:12:26,229 See, if we were living out here permanently, 366 00:12:26,312 --> 00:12:27,521 I'd do this for you every week. 367 00:12:27,604 --> 00:12:29,688 - Could you pass me a knife? - Sure. Certainly, my darling. 368 00:12:29,771 --> 00:12:31,021 And some bread. 369 00:12:31,104 --> 00:12:33,688 Which bread would you like, my honey bun? 370 00:12:33,771 --> 00:12:35,104 Oh, I don't know. 371 00:12:35,187 --> 00:12:36,021 Let me ask you a question. 372 00:12:36,104 --> 00:12:38,563 And I'll believe whatever you say to me. 373 00:12:38,646 --> 00:12:41,604 - Would you live here? - Yeah, what's not to like? 374 00:12:41,688 --> 00:12:43,396 - So you would live here? - Yeah. 375 00:12:43,479 --> 00:12:44,563 But you haven't changed your ticket. 376 00:12:44,646 --> 00:12:47,479 I know, but I need to get the kids back to school. 377 00:12:47,563 --> 00:12:49,563 Catch up, see their friends. 378 00:12:49,646 --> 00:12:52,104 It was always an open return ticket, wasn't it? 379 00:12:52,187 --> 00:12:54,229 It was never... 380 00:12:54,354 --> 00:12:56,396 It's not an open return ticket. It's a return ticket. 381 00:12:56,479 --> 00:12:58,604 [laughs] Okay, well, it's a return ticket. 382 00:12:58,688 --> 00:13:01,187 Do you ever wonder sometimes 383 00:13:01,271 --> 00:13:02,938 if our relationship is completely dependent 384 00:13:03,021 --> 00:13:04,563 on us not seeing each other that much, 385 00:13:04,646 --> 00:13:05,896 and if we did spend a lot of time together, 386 00:13:05,980 --> 00:13:08,229 we'd realize that we didn't get on? 387 00:13:08,312 --> 00:13:09,646 Yeah, probably. 388 00:13:09,730 --> 00:13:12,271 - I was joking. - Oh, I wasn't. 389 00:13:12,354 --> 00:13:15,104 - Yes, you were. - [giggles] 390 00:13:15,187 --> 00:13:16,396 Check that out. 391 00:13:16,479 --> 00:13:17,604 ♪ playful music ♪ 392 00:13:17,688 --> 00:13:19,062 It's the Greek. 393 00:13:19,146 --> 00:13:20,563 Any reaction? 394 00:13:20,646 --> 00:13:22,938 Yeah, it's the Greek. I've seen it before. 395 00:13:23,021 --> 00:13:24,730 Words of support? 396 00:13:24,813 --> 00:13:26,896 You're deeply, deeply difficult to impress, 397 00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:28,104 do you know that? 398 00:13:28,187 --> 00:13:30,396 I know. 399 00:13:30,479 --> 00:13:31,980 You're so lucky I settled for you. 400 00:13:32,062 --> 00:13:32,563 [laughs] 401 00:13:32,646 --> 00:13:35,146 What is gonna happen 402 00:13:35,229 --> 00:13:37,146 is I'm gonna smash it for the next few weeks. 403 00:13:37,229 --> 00:13:38,354 - Sell out the Greek... - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 404 00:13:38,438 --> 00:13:40,229 ...then you're gonna hear about me selling out the Greek, 405 00:13:40,312 --> 00:13:43,187 either from a text message from me, or from the news. 406 00:13:43,271 --> 00:13:44,312 You'll be on the news. 407 00:13:44,396 --> 00:13:45,855 And then you'll arrive at LAX, 408 00:13:45,938 --> 00:13:46,896 and then I'll be waiting for you, and you'll go, 409 00:13:46,980 --> 00:13:48,354 "Romesh, I'm sorry I doubted you. 410 00:13:48,438 --> 00:13:50,229 I went back to England 411 00:13:50,312 --> 00:13:51,771 despite the fact that you were on your way 412 00:13:51,855 --> 00:13:52,730 to becoming a huge success in America. 413 00:13:52,813 --> 00:13:54,563 How will you ever forgive me?" 414 00:13:54,646 --> 00:13:56,604 I'll say, "Leesa, I don't know if I can," and then you'll go, 415 00:13:56,688 --> 00:13:58,688 "Romesh, what can I do to make it up to you?" 416 00:13:58,771 --> 00:14:00,646 And then I'll go, "How about a blowie?" 417 00:14:00,730 --> 00:14:01,646 [snickers] Oh, God. 418 00:14:01,730 --> 00:14:03,104 And then you'll go, "Yes." 419 00:14:03,187 --> 00:14:05,104 And then it'd be, like, just fade to black, 420 00:14:05,187 --> 00:14:07,604 as you suck me off. 421 00:14:07,688 --> 00:14:08,771 That's never gonna happen. 422 00:14:08,896 --> 00:14:10,187 [laughs] 423 00:14:12,896 --> 00:14:15,438 ♪ playful music ♪ 424 00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:17,312 [Shanthi] Did you both enjoy your date? 425 00:14:17,396 --> 00:14:19,813 - [Leesa] Yeah, it was good. - [Romesh] It was great. 426 00:14:19,896 --> 00:14:20,980 Tea, anyone? 427 00:14:21,062 --> 00:14:22,187 I'll have an Earl Grey, please. 428 00:14:22,271 --> 00:14:23,354 Earl Grey. 429 00:14:23,438 --> 00:14:24,521 Can I have green tea, please, Leesa? 430 00:14:24,604 --> 00:14:27,938 [Rags] Thanks, Leesa, you're really nice, thank you. 431 00:14:28,021 --> 00:14:30,938 What are we doing? Like, we watching some TV or... 432 00:14:31,021 --> 00:14:32,604 Uh, well, I thought you and I could go out, Mum. 433 00:14:32,688 --> 00:14:34,104 Yeah? 434 00:14:34,187 --> 00:14:35,855 Do you know how when we were with Arsenio... 435 00:14:35,938 --> 00:14:37,813 Yes? 436 00:14:37,896 --> 00:14:39,521 ...and you said, "I haven't been on a date for five years." 437 00:14:39,604 --> 00:14:40,396 - That's very true. Yeah. - Yeah. 438 00:14:40,479 --> 00:14:41,646 So what I thought we could do today... 439 00:14:41,730 --> 00:14:43,312 [Shanthi] Mm-hmm? 440 00:14:43,396 --> 00:14:47,146 ...I'm taking you to sort of like a-a cookery 441 00:14:47,229 --> 00:14:48,855 kind of mixer, 442 00:14:48,938 --> 00:14:51,271 which is where you and I are gonna do some cooking. 443 00:14:51,354 --> 00:14:53,021 But there are some gentlemen there, 444 00:14:53,104 --> 00:14:55,229 and you can chat and mingle and stuff like that. 445 00:14:55,312 --> 00:14:56,604 [Shanthi] Oh, yeah. 446 00:14:56,688 --> 00:14:59,688 And if you get on with somebody... 447 00:14:59,771 --> 00:15:01,980 - Yeah? - You can have a bit of dick. 448 00:15:02,062 --> 00:15:03,104 ♪♪♪ 449 00:15:03,187 --> 00:15:05,104 ♪ Take it on the chin ♪ 450 00:15:05,187 --> 00:15:06,563 ♪ Six million ways to shake it and it's grim ♪ 451 00:15:06,646 --> 00:15:08,354 ♪ That's disgusting ♪ 452 00:15:08,438 --> 00:15:10,688 ♪ Got me staying for the dim, baby, I'ma win ♪ 453 00:15:10,771 --> 00:15:12,021 ♪ I'ma cut the cake and get it in, uh ♪ 454 00:15:12,104 --> 00:15:16,479 ♪ Bad man ting, bad man ting ♪ 455 00:15:16,563 --> 00:15:19,146 We're really excited to welcome everybody tonight 456 00:15:19,229 --> 00:15:21,980 to BLVD Kitchen for our cooking class 457 00:15:22,062 --> 00:15:23,813 on foods of love. 458 00:15:23,896 --> 00:15:25,187 So the first thing we're gonna make tonight 459 00:15:25,271 --> 00:15:27,354 is going to be a cocktail with watermelons. 460 00:15:27,438 --> 00:15:29,855 It's been said to actually even mimic Viagra. 461 00:15:29,938 --> 00:15:32,479 So we're gonna start off 462 00:15:32,563 --> 00:15:34,521 with our watermelon cocktail tonight. 463 00:15:34,604 --> 00:15:37,021 [Ben] Are you sort of nervous for your mum? Are you...? 464 00:15:37,104 --> 00:15:38,688 [Romesh] Yes, I am nervous for my mum. 465 00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:40,771 I don't think my mum's ever been on a date. 466 00:15:40,855 --> 00:15:42,688 I mean, she's been on a date with my dad. 467 00:15:42,771 --> 00:15:45,187 But that was after they'd sort of settled down and got married. 468 00:15:45,271 --> 00:15:46,438 So I'm gonna try and encourage her 469 00:15:46,521 --> 00:15:48,354 to sort of talk to people, 470 00:15:48,438 --> 00:15:50,646 which she won't do instinctively. 471 00:15:50,730 --> 00:15:52,730 - How are you? - Good, thank you. 472 00:15:52,813 --> 00:15:54,354 Enjoy your lesson? 473 00:15:54,438 --> 00:15:56,688 Do you come very often here or...? 474 00:15:56,771 --> 00:15:57,980 [Ben] I just want to say, this is great. 475 00:15:58,104 --> 00:15:59,354 You know, the focus group said 476 00:15:59,479 --> 00:16:00,646 you should be nicer to your mum. 477 00:16:00,771 --> 00:16:02,146 You're being nicer to your mum. 478 00:16:02,229 --> 00:16:04,396 Oh, my God. Can you help me? 479 00:16:04,479 --> 00:16:06,271 You got to put it hard, like this. 480 00:16:06,354 --> 00:16:07,938 Ah. 481 00:16:08,021 --> 00:16:10,229 I'm not doing this in response to the focus group. 482 00:16:10,312 --> 00:16:11,896 I'm doing this because I want to help my mum out. 483 00:16:11,980 --> 00:16:13,604 [laughs] 484 00:16:13,688 --> 00:16:15,521 Is it an interesting coincidence 485 00:16:15,604 --> 00:16:16,396 that it's off the back of the focus group 486 00:16:16,479 --> 00:16:17,896 saying I'm not nice enough to my mum? 487 00:16:17,980 --> 00:16:19,187 Yes, arguably yes. 488 00:16:19,271 --> 00:16:20,688 Pat, pat, pat, pat, pat, like that. 489 00:16:20,771 --> 00:16:23,146 Don't be afraid. [laughs] 490 00:16:23,229 --> 00:16:25,521 [chef] You know, I get the cherries out... 491 00:16:25,604 --> 00:16:26,229 [man] I like to pick my cherries. 492 00:16:26,312 --> 00:16:27,938 - [chef] Ooh. - [laughter] 493 00:16:28,021 --> 00:16:30,354 [chef] It's getting racy in here. 494 00:16:30,438 --> 00:16:32,062 [Shanthi] I'm going to get drunk. 495 00:16:32,146 --> 00:16:35,771 [laughter] 496 00:16:35,855 --> 00:16:37,563 [Ben] Uh, I guess you didn't really need to worry, 497 00:16:37,646 --> 00:16:41,730 because your mum was actually more sociable than you were. 498 00:16:41,813 --> 00:16:44,479 Yes, my mum was a lot more interesting and sociable 499 00:16:44,563 --> 00:16:46,104 and funny than I was, yes. 500 00:16:46,187 --> 00:16:46,646 I have to concede that. 501 00:16:46,730 --> 00:16:48,229 [Shanthi laughs] 502 00:16:48,312 --> 00:16:52,896 That's-that's, uh, namaste. That's namaste. 503 00:16:52,980 --> 00:16:54,646 - How are you doing, Mum? - Doing fine. 504 00:16:54,730 --> 00:16:56,438 I didn't think that I will enjoy so much, 505 00:16:56,521 --> 00:16:58,146 but it's good, good, meeting-- 506 00:16:58,229 --> 00:17:00,062 Isn't it-isn't it mainly Buddhists that say that line? 507 00:17:00,146 --> 00:17:02,604 No, no, there are Hindus, Muslims. 508 00:17:02,688 --> 00:17:06,104 [Ben] I mean, did you have any sort of fun at all? 509 00:17:06,187 --> 00:17:08,229 Um... 510 00:17:08,312 --> 00:17:10,980 Me, Don, and Bob had an interesting conversation 511 00:17:11,062 --> 00:17:12,896 about how, uh, 512 00:17:12,980 --> 00:17:14,855 phones have affected our lives. 513 00:17:14,938 --> 00:17:16,521 What do you use, Rom? 514 00:17:16,604 --> 00:17:18,980 I've got an iPhone as well, 515 00:17:19,062 --> 00:17:20,271 iPhone 6. 516 00:17:20,354 --> 00:17:21,938 [laughter] 517 00:17:22,021 --> 00:17:24,312 Yeah, it's an amazing device. It really is. 518 00:17:24,396 --> 00:17:28,229 It's so nice to meet so many different people. 519 00:17:28,312 --> 00:17:30,563 [Romesh] I went into this week 520 00:17:30,646 --> 00:17:31,521 sort of pissed off about 521 00:17:31,604 --> 00:17:33,688 what the focus group said, and, you know, 522 00:17:33,771 --> 00:17:36,271 them sort of insinuating that I'm boring. 523 00:17:36,354 --> 00:17:37,855 And after this evening, 524 00:17:37,938 --> 00:17:39,354 I actually think they weren't harsh enough. 525 00:17:39,438 --> 00:17:40,396 I am dull as fuck. 526 00:17:47,771 --> 00:17:50,730 ♪ instrumental music ♪ 527 00:17:50,813 --> 00:17:54,479 ♪♪♪ 528 00:17:54,563 --> 00:17:54,980 - [Romesh] All right, Rags? - [Rags] Hi, there. 529 00:17:55,062 --> 00:17:57,104 All right, man. 530 00:17:57,187 --> 00:17:59,438 What's up with you? You seem a bit down. 531 00:17:59,521 --> 00:18:01,980 I mean, like, the focus group thing. 532 00:18:02,062 --> 00:18:03,771 That-that sort of brought me right down, you know, like-- 533 00:18:03,855 --> 00:18:05,146 Look, I'm sorry. 534 00:18:05,229 --> 00:18:07,855 I'm sorry that when I was watching 535 00:18:07,938 --> 00:18:09,604 the focus group, 536 00:18:09,688 --> 00:18:11,646 and they said that I was a jerk, 537 00:18:11,730 --> 00:18:13,271 and that I was out of order to my mum, 538 00:18:13,354 --> 00:18:14,688 I was out of order to Leesa, 539 00:18:14,771 --> 00:18:16,771 I was unlikable, I was not funny, 540 00:18:16,855 --> 00:18:19,146 I was boring, I wasn't interesting. 541 00:18:19,229 --> 00:18:21,396 I'm sorry that when I was watching all of that, 542 00:18:21,479 --> 00:18:23,312 I didn't think to myself, 543 00:18:23,396 --> 00:18:24,938 "Poor Rags, he's not been mentioned." 544 00:18:25,021 --> 00:18:26,813 You did think that? 545 00:18:26,896 --> 00:18:27,938 No, I'm sorry that I didn't think that. 546 00:18:28,021 --> 00:18:29,479 Oh, right, yeah, thanks, man. 547 00:18:29,563 --> 00:18:31,312 For me to be in this show properly, 548 00:18:31,396 --> 00:18:32,813 and then people to notice me, 549 00:18:32,896 --> 00:18:34,312 I think I have to do something good. 550 00:18:34,396 --> 00:18:35,855 Okay, so what I've done, 551 00:18:35,938 --> 00:18:38,980 I've just organized the stand-up comedy lady 552 00:18:39,062 --> 00:18:40,187 that actually teaches everyone to do 553 00:18:40,271 --> 00:18:42,229 stand-up comedy properly in the U.S. 554 00:18:42,312 --> 00:18:44,771 So you want to be a stand-up comedian? 555 00:18:44,855 --> 00:18:45,604 Yeah, I've always wanted to be 556 00:18:45,688 --> 00:18:48,104 in the entertainment industry, but-- 557 00:18:48,187 --> 00:18:49,688 So you've tried to get into the entertainment industry 558 00:18:49,771 --> 00:18:51,187 before, have you? 559 00:18:51,271 --> 00:18:52,896 Well, I formed a band called Unwanted Generation 560 00:18:52,980 --> 00:18:53,896 back in the old days. 561 00:18:53,980 --> 00:18:55,187 Unwanted Generation? 562 00:18:55,271 --> 00:18:58,021 Unwanted Generation, back in Sri Lanka. 563 00:18:58,104 --> 00:19:00,187 You know, we went on shows. 564 00:19:00,271 --> 00:19:01,396 I had the guitar, 565 00:19:01,479 --> 00:19:02,396 but it was not plugged in. 566 00:19:02,479 --> 00:19:05,229 And I used to just walk around doing this. 567 00:19:05,354 --> 00:19:06,521 Why did you do that? 568 00:19:06,604 --> 00:19:07,604 Like, I wanted to be in the band, mate. 569 00:19:07,688 --> 00:19:08,771 That's what I was born to do. 570 00:19:08,855 --> 00:19:09,688 But my parents didn't allow-- 571 00:19:09,771 --> 00:19:11,688 I mean, you can't be born to do it. 572 00:19:11,771 --> 00:19:12,730 You can't be born to be a guitar player. 573 00:19:12,813 --> 00:19:16,730 My parents didn't allow me to learn it, all right? 574 00:19:16,813 --> 00:19:17,771 Will you actually be doing the stand-up yourself? 575 00:19:17,855 --> 00:19:19,896 Or do you want to just stand there and mime 576 00:19:19,980 --> 00:19:21,354 and somebody else does the set for you? 577 00:19:21,438 --> 00:19:25,688 Okay, fine, I will come and support you 578 00:19:25,771 --> 00:19:27,730 on your lifelong dream of becoming a stand-up comedian, 579 00:19:27,813 --> 00:19:31,563 which started two days ago when you watched the focus group. 580 00:19:31,646 --> 00:19:33,312 ♪ hip-hop music ♪ 581 00:19:33,396 --> 00:19:35,730 [Romesh] Rags has lived his whole life 582 00:19:35,813 --> 00:19:36,938 believing that he should be famous. 583 00:19:37,021 --> 00:19:38,604 Stand-up comedy, I don't know where that's come from. 584 00:19:38,688 --> 00:19:42,563 But I-I don't think the discipline matters. 585 00:19:42,646 --> 00:19:45,604 If he discovered that origami was the way to worldwide fame, 586 00:19:45,688 --> 00:19:48,396 then he'd be folding paper like a motherfucker. 587 00:19:48,479 --> 00:19:50,187 ♪ Pretty good at this ♪ 588 00:19:50,271 --> 00:19:52,271 ♪ You should swing by the session ♪ 589 00:19:52,354 --> 00:19:54,646 ♪ About a thousand people even think that I'm a legend ♪ 590 00:19:54,730 --> 00:19:57,563 [man] I'm white, I'm Christian, 591 00:19:57,646 --> 00:19:58,813 I smoke cigarettes inside my home, 592 00:19:58,896 --> 00:20:00,187 I eat red meat, 593 00:20:00,271 --> 00:20:01,146 and I live in Los Angeles, California. 594 00:20:01,229 --> 00:20:03,730 I'm the freaking minority. 595 00:20:03,813 --> 00:20:05,813 [laughter and applause] 596 00:20:05,896 --> 00:20:06,813 [woman] And I go in there 597 00:20:06,896 --> 00:20:08,688 and I go up to this male sales assistant, 598 00:20:08,771 --> 00:20:11,104 and I say, "Oh, um, excuse me, um, 599 00:20:11,187 --> 00:20:13,438 can you tell me where I can find the knickers, please?" 600 00:20:13,521 --> 00:20:14,312 And do you know what he whispers to me? 601 00:20:14,396 --> 00:20:17,187 He whispers, "Are you asking me 602 00:20:17,271 --> 00:20:19,730 where you can find the black people?" 603 00:20:19,813 --> 00:20:23,021 [laughter] 604 00:20:23,104 --> 00:20:25,438 I live in Little Baghdad. 605 00:20:25,521 --> 00:20:27,104 I mean, Iran. I mean, Persia. 606 00:20:27,187 --> 00:20:29,604 I mean, Beverly Hills. 607 00:20:29,688 --> 00:20:32,771 [woman guffaws] 608 00:20:32,855 --> 00:20:33,896 It's so crowded there, 609 00:20:33,980 --> 00:20:37,521 you can't even find a place to park your camel. 610 00:20:37,563 --> 00:20:39,938 [laughter] 611 00:20:40,021 --> 00:20:43,062 ♪ playful music ♪ 612 00:20:43,146 --> 00:20:47,896 I heard more racism in the hour that I was sat in there 613 00:20:47,980 --> 00:20:49,563 than you get at a Klan rally. 614 00:20:49,646 --> 00:20:52,771 They have a new restaurant. I think it's in Westwood. 615 00:20:52,855 --> 00:20:53,354 It's a fast food joint. 616 00:20:53,438 --> 00:20:56,062 It's called Burka King. 617 00:20:56,146 --> 00:20:58,730 [laughter] 618 00:20:58,813 --> 00:21:00,980 [woman laughing loudly] 619 00:21:01,062 --> 00:21:04,730 ♪♪♪ 620 00:21:04,813 --> 00:21:06,479 It's a funny joke. 621 00:21:06,563 --> 00:21:08,813 [Ben] So you've learned a little bit 622 00:21:08,896 --> 00:21:10,312 about how to do stand-up in America? 623 00:21:10,396 --> 00:21:12,896 Yes, I have learned a little bit 624 00:21:12,980 --> 00:21:13,521 about how to do stand-up in America. 625 00:21:13,604 --> 00:21:15,438 You pick an ethnic group, 626 00:21:15,521 --> 00:21:17,396 and you batter the shit out of them verbally. 627 00:21:17,479 --> 00:21:18,604 [applause] 628 00:21:18,688 --> 00:21:22,312 Comedy comes in many colors, in many ways, in many things, 629 00:21:22,396 --> 00:21:23,312 and I've got a new person. 630 00:21:23,396 --> 00:21:24,646 Can I have your name? 631 00:21:24,730 --> 00:21:25,104 Uh, it's not me, it's my-Rags. 632 00:21:25,187 --> 00:21:26,604 Why don't you? 633 00:21:26,688 --> 00:21:29,312 Oh, with that hair? Give him a round of applause. 634 00:21:29,396 --> 00:21:31,312 He's coming up here. 635 00:21:31,396 --> 00:21:33,896 - We're gonna get you up here. - Whoa. 636 00:21:33,980 --> 00:21:35,479 All right, now, let's do this real quick. 637 00:21:35,563 --> 00:21:36,563 What name are you gonna go by? 638 00:21:36,646 --> 00:21:38,187 - Rags. - Rex. 639 00:21:38,271 --> 00:21:40,563 - Rags. - Rags! Oh, is that what it is? 640 00:21:40,646 --> 00:21:41,980 Let's go from Rags to riches. 641 00:21:42,062 --> 00:21:42,980 Ladies and gentlemen, 642 00:21:43,062 --> 00:21:44,521 bringing up the comedy, Rags! 643 00:21:44,604 --> 00:21:47,187 First time performing. Let's do this. 644 00:21:47,271 --> 00:21:49,104 [Romesh] When he walked up, 645 00:21:49,187 --> 00:21:51,646 I felt terrif-I felt like I was doing my first gig. 646 00:21:51,730 --> 00:21:53,062 Um... 647 00:21:53,146 --> 00:21:55,896 ♪ dramatic percussive music ♪ 648 00:21:55,980 --> 00:21:57,813 My name is Rags. 649 00:21:57,896 --> 00:22:01,187 ♪♪♪ 650 00:22:01,271 --> 00:22:03,479 Uh, I'll have to be honest. 651 00:22:03,563 --> 00:22:04,896 This is the first time I'm standing up 652 00:22:04,980 --> 00:22:07,229 trying to attempt at this, right? 653 00:22:07,312 --> 00:22:08,980 Being a stand-up comedian, I guess. 654 00:22:09,062 --> 00:22:12,312 I came in today thinking that it was gonna be a class, 655 00:22:12,396 --> 00:22:14,229 so I was prepared to bring something. 656 00:22:14,312 --> 00:22:17,187 I was expecting notebook, pen, things like that. 657 00:22:17,271 --> 00:22:20,187 [laughter] 658 00:22:20,271 --> 00:22:23,354 He basically freestyled five minutes of stand-up. 659 00:22:23,438 --> 00:22:24,438 So we used to look over the grass and go, 660 00:22:24,521 --> 00:22:27,896 "Where the fuck are we?" You know what I mean? 661 00:22:27,980 --> 00:22:28,896 - [laughter] - So... 662 00:22:28,980 --> 00:22:31,146 [Romesh] It was great. He was amazing. 663 00:22:31,229 --> 00:22:32,980 I was really proud of him. I was buzzing, watching him. 664 00:22:33,062 --> 00:22:34,688 "How are you enjoying it?" And I said, 665 00:22:34,771 --> 00:22:36,938 "How can I enjoy, darling? My balls are on the ceiling." 666 00:22:37,021 --> 00:22:38,730 [laughter] 667 00:22:38,813 --> 00:22:40,980 [Romesh] I thought his delivery was perfect. 668 00:22:41,062 --> 00:22:42,271 I thought, you know, he had some good jokes in there. 669 00:22:42,354 --> 00:22:43,813 It's his first time ever. 670 00:22:43,896 --> 00:22:45,771 He's just pulling them out of the air. 671 00:22:45,855 --> 00:22:46,980 I thought it was great. 672 00:22:47,062 --> 00:22:48,855 You were absolutely fantastic. 673 00:22:48,938 --> 00:22:49,980 - Yeah? - How did it feel? 674 00:22:50,062 --> 00:22:51,104 I feel like I can do it, yeah. 675 00:22:51,187 --> 00:22:52,980 [Romesh] I thought you were better than everyone. 676 00:22:53,062 --> 00:22:54,730 I mean, I didn't want to push too hard, 677 00:22:54,813 --> 00:22:55,938 but at the end of the day, 678 00:22:56,021 --> 00:22:57,730 maybe a possibility at some stage 679 00:22:57,813 --> 00:23:00,396 that I could do a little bit with you, or...? 680 00:23:00,479 --> 00:23:02,521 [music stops] 681 00:23:02,646 --> 00:23:05,271 Uh, I'm not saying that we've created a monster. 682 00:23:05,354 --> 00:23:07,438 I'm just thinking, like, as a small guest spot or something. 683 00:23:07,521 --> 00:23:11,855 Why don't we enjoy tonight? Yeah? 684 00:23:11,938 --> 00:23:14,187 We might've created a monster. 685 00:23:14,271 --> 00:23:17,438 ♪ staccato orchestral music ♪ 686 00:23:17,521 --> 00:23:19,062 ♪♪♪ 687 00:23:19,146 --> 00:23:21,229 Did you contact any of those blokes? 688 00:23:21,312 --> 00:23:23,688 I had good time cooking and watching them, 689 00:23:23,771 --> 00:23:24,312 but... 690 00:23:24,396 --> 00:23:26,896 I didn't like any of them. 691 00:23:26,980 --> 00:23:28,104 You don't know my taste. 692 00:23:28,187 --> 00:23:29,980 What is your taste? 693 00:23:30,062 --> 00:23:31,896 Tall black men. 694 00:23:31,980 --> 00:23:33,271 Sorry, did you just say your taste is tall black men? 695 00:23:33,354 --> 00:23:36,479 - Yes. - [chuckles] 696 00:23:36,563 --> 00:23:37,771 Okay, well... 697 00:23:37,855 --> 00:23:41,604 So I think I've been smashing life, basically. 698 00:23:41,688 --> 00:23:42,479 We had a nice day at the-- 699 00:23:42,563 --> 00:23:44,563 Did you enjoy your date-dating? 700 00:23:44,646 --> 00:23:45,604 Yeah, it was lovely. It was really nice. 701 00:23:45,688 --> 00:23:47,813 And Rags and I actually had a nice time 702 00:23:47,896 --> 00:23:49,563 at the stand-up class. 703 00:23:49,646 --> 00:23:50,271 [Leesa] Why did you take him to a stand-up class? 704 00:23:50,354 --> 00:23:52,688 He's agreed that I'm gonna be 705 00:23:52,771 --> 00:23:54,938 a-a good stand-up comedian, 706 00:23:55,021 --> 00:23:56,438 so I'll be the second act, backing him. 707 00:23:56,521 --> 00:23:58,896 - The warm-up. - Before he--warm-up guy. 708 00:23:58,980 --> 00:24:00,396 [Leesa] You need to have 20 minutes-- 709 00:24:00,479 --> 00:24:02,062 I'll get 'em really nice and wet. 710 00:24:02,146 --> 00:24:03,980 And then he comes on stage. 711 00:24:04,062 --> 00:24:05,062 - Ew. - Why would you say "wet"? 712 00:24:05,146 --> 00:24:07,813 - Sweating in laughter. - No-nobody says that. 713 00:24:07,896 --> 00:24:09,021 Nobody says that. 714 00:24:09,104 --> 00:24:10,271 It means something else in the U.K. 715 00:24:10,354 --> 00:24:13,438 I think it's nice of Romesh to give you an opportunity. 716 00:24:13,521 --> 00:24:14,771 Yeah, I agree with that. 717 00:24:14,855 --> 00:24:16,146 He's only gone with you to the stand-up, 718 00:24:16,229 --> 00:24:18,104 he only took you to the dating thing, 719 00:24:18,187 --> 00:24:19,855 he only went on that horse riding date with me 720 00:24:19,938 --> 00:24:21,312 because of that focus group. 721 00:24:21,396 --> 00:24:22,479 I hold my hands up. 722 00:24:22,563 --> 00:24:24,438 I reacted to the focus group. 723 00:24:24,521 --> 00:24:25,980 They were saying I was a jerk. 724 00:24:26,062 --> 00:24:26,855 They were saying I was horrible to you. 725 00:24:26,938 --> 00:24:28,980 They were saying I was horrible to you. 726 00:24:29,062 --> 00:24:30,104 The sort of thing that got to me the most 727 00:24:30,187 --> 00:24:32,604 is, like, them saying I'm boring, if I'm being honest. 728 00:24:32,688 --> 00:24:33,479 When we all are together, 729 00:24:33,563 --> 00:24:36,646 but you don't say much, uh... 730 00:24:36,730 --> 00:24:38,813 So you think I'm boring? 731 00:24:38,896 --> 00:24:40,062 I like you being boring. 732 00:24:40,146 --> 00:24:41,229 - Uh-huh. - That's what I'm saying. 733 00:24:41,312 --> 00:24:44,146 Yeah, so you're agreeing. You all think I'm boring. 734 00:24:44,229 --> 00:24:45,646 [Shanthi] No, I don't-I didn't say that. 735 00:24:45,730 --> 00:24:47,604 You think I'm boring, you think I'm boring. 736 00:24:47,688 --> 00:24:50,312 - You think I'm boring. - A little bit boring. 737 00:24:50,396 --> 00:24:53,688 All right, well, would a boring person do this? 738 00:24:55,354 --> 00:24:57,146 [Rags] Oh, my God. 739 00:24:59,980 --> 00:25:02,980 Are you crazy? You nutter. 740 00:25:03,062 --> 00:25:05,271 Huh? It's sugar glass. I set it up. 741 00:25:05,354 --> 00:25:07,229 [whispering] Fucking hell. 742 00:25:07,312 --> 00:25:09,604 This guy's mad. 743 00:25:09,688 --> 00:25:12,062 Huh? 744 00:25:12,146 --> 00:25:14,896 ♪ playful music ♪ 745 00:25:14,980 --> 00:25:15,521 You've got to admit that that was impressive. 746 00:25:15,604 --> 00:25:17,563 I mean, that is me... 747 00:25:17,604 --> 00:25:20,521 I mean, the focus group, show 'em that. 748 00:25:20,604 --> 00:25:23,062 Show 'em a bit of that. See what they think then. 749 00:25:23,146 --> 00:25:24,604 [Ben] You said the whole way along that the focus group 750 00:25:24,688 --> 00:25:25,855 has not bothered you. 751 00:25:25,938 --> 00:25:26,479 Are you at least admitting now 752 00:25:26,563 --> 00:25:29,688 that it did bother you? 753 00:25:29,771 --> 00:25:33,104 ♪♪♪ 754 00:25:33,187 --> 00:25:35,021 Yes, it really did bother me. 755 00:25:35,104 --> 00:25:36,438 Was that not exciting? 756 00:25:36,521 --> 00:25:37,604 [Rags] That's not exciting. 757 00:25:37,688 --> 00:25:39,104 Leesa, did you not find that-- 758 00:25:39,187 --> 00:25:40,271 - I was scared. - I was scared as well. 759 00:25:40,354 --> 00:25:42,354 Man, I got such a fear, 760 00:25:42,438 --> 00:25:45,187 I thought you were gonna cut your neck off or something. 761 00:25:45,271 --> 00:25:46,438 [Ben] It looked a little bit suicidal. 762 00:25:46,521 --> 00:25:49,021 Yeah, I can see that. Yeah. 763 00:25:49,104 --> 00:25:51,563 You-you say, "You think I'm boring, 764 00:25:51,646 --> 00:25:52,938 you think I'm boring, you think I'm boring," 765 00:25:53,021 --> 00:25:55,229 then you jump through a sheet of glass. 766 00:25:55,312 --> 00:25:58,521 That is probably a man trying to kill himself. 767 00:25:58,604 --> 00:26:00,438 Go back to being boring. 768 00:26:01,980 --> 00:26:03,396 You better get the dustpan and brush. 769 00:26:03,479 --> 00:26:05,771 Yeah, clean it up. 770 00:26:05,855 --> 00:26:06,730 Okay. I'm sorry. 771 00:26:06,813 --> 00:26:10,187 Was is not even a little bit exciting? 772 00:26:13,104 --> 00:26:15,521 [sighs] Fuck. 773 00:26:15,604 --> 00:26:17,396 ♪ I keep pushing mommies ♪ 774 00:26:17,479 --> 00:26:18,646 ♪ Please don't try and tell me nothin' ♪ 775 00:26:18,730 --> 00:26:20,479 ♪ You are not my demographic ♪ 776 00:26:20,563 --> 00:26:22,021 ♪ I don't care if you say fuck him ♪ 777 00:26:22,104 --> 00:26:23,938 ♪ I'm erratic with my rappin' ♪ 778 00:26:24,021 --> 00:26:25,980 ♪ Give a fuck if you say somethin' 'bout my lyrics ♪ 779 00:26:26,062 --> 00:26:27,229 ♪ I spit lyrics for the nutter showin' lovin' ♪ 780 00:26:27,312 --> 00:26:28,062 ♪ I'll be sittin' here ♪ 781 00:26:28,146 --> 00:26:29,771 ♪ See my future crystal clear ♪ 782 00:26:29,855 --> 00:26:31,521 ♪ Sippin' on a whiskey ♪ 783 00:26:31,604 --> 00:26:33,479 ♪ On the beach in sunny center ♪ 784 00:26:33,563 --> 00:26:35,479 ♪ How we never liked the idea idolizing fuckin' neeks ♪ 785 00:26:35,563 --> 00:26:37,021 ♪ Ralph Lauren was such a cheat ♪ 786 00:26:37,104 --> 00:26:38,271 ♪ But man they rock him on the streets ♪ 787 00:26:38,354 --> 00:26:39,521 ♪ I'm sittin' here ♪ 788 00:26:39,604 --> 00:26:41,062 ♪ I don't rock no cedar wood ♪ 789 00:26:41,146 --> 00:26:41,730 ♪ Man I'm tryna speak as good ♪ 790 00:26:41,813 --> 00:26:44,021 ♪ Okay fam read a book ♪ 791 00:26:44,104 --> 00:26:44,771 ♪ Grab a matchstick and some oil ♪ 792 00:26:44,855 --> 00:26:46,771 ♪ Be a G, eat the top ♪ 793 00:26:46,855 --> 00:26:49,771 [bright tone]