1
00:00:06,123 --> 00:00:09,323
‎NETFLIX 影集

2
00:00:29,083 --> 00:00:30,163
‎你這爛人

3
00:00:33,003 --> 00:00:34,283
‎-給我
‎-不用罵髒話吧

4
00:00:34,363 --> 00:00:38,083
‎快給我，你拿著那東西真的很討人厭

5
00:00:42,363 --> 00:00:44,883
‎快來，走吧，好乖

6
00:00:45,843 --> 00:00:47,283
‎快點，好乖

7
00:01:02,043 --> 00:01:04,323
‎-天啊
‎-笨蛋

8
00:01:06,003 --> 00:01:09,243
‎說不定活下去還是有意義的

9
00:01:09,323 --> 00:01:11,963
‎-我的天啊
‎-不好笑，我說真的，可能會…

10
00:01:12,043 --> 00:01:13,363
‎天啊，我不覺得

11
00:01:13,443 --> 00:01:15,123
‎-東尼，把這裡整理好
‎-不要

12
00:01:21,003 --> 00:01:22,283
‎我的手肘也受傷了

13
00:01:31,523 --> 00:01:32,803
‎真要命，快點

14
00:01:32,883 --> 00:01:35,083
‎我在伸展，我喜歡照規矩來

15
00:01:35,163 --> 00:01:36,443
‎例如穿白色打網球

16
00:01:36,523 --> 00:01:38,363
‎你他媽快把球給我

17
00:01:38,443 --> 00:01:40,723
‎東尼，注意你的措辭

18
00:01:46,003 --> 00:01:47,043
‎15比0

19
00:01:52,603 --> 00:01:53,803
‎加油，麥修

20
00:01:58,123 --> 00:02:00,003
‎-一比零
‎-好，換邊

21
00:02:00,083 --> 00:02:01,243
‎-不要，靠
‎-什麼？

22
00:02:01,323 --> 00:02:03,163
‎第一局打完就是要換邊

23
00:02:03,243 --> 00:02:06,363
‎但陽光照著我的眼睛
‎你這呆瓜，這對你有利

24
00:02:06,443 --> 00:02:10,242
‎不要一直在這用這種詞好嗎？拜託你

25
00:02:12,163 --> 00:02:14,003
‎-搞屁啊
‎-好啦，你就…

26
00:02:33,643 --> 00:02:35,083
‎不要

27
00:02:36,163 --> 00:02:37,083
‎你別想

28
00:02:38,203 --> 00:02:39,163
‎成熟點吧

29
00:02:44,203 --> 00:02:45,043
‎算你衰

30
00:02:45,963 --> 00:02:46,803
‎很精彩的比賽

31
00:02:50,243 --> 00:02:51,363
‎-瞧你那樣子
‎-怎樣？

32
00:02:51,443 --> 00:02:53,203
‎-簡直是笑話
‎-什麼啦？

33
00:02:53,283 --> 00:02:54,643
‎你看起來就像馬拉度納

34
00:02:55,763 --> 00:02:57,243
‎不是80年代的他，是…

35
00:02:58,163 --> 00:02:59,363
‎他過世之前

36
00:02:59,443 --> 00:03:01,123
‎-他死之後
‎-別耍嘴皮子

37
00:03:01,203 --> 00:03:04,163
‎（《坦伯里報章》）

38
00:03:06,923 --> 00:03:07,763
‎誰贏了？

39
00:03:08,803 --> 00:03:09,763
‎他贏了，不過…

40
00:03:09,843 --> 00:03:11,163
‎-真假？
‎-對

41
00:03:11,243 --> 00:03:14,403
‎我絕不會再回去那邊
‎他的措辭嚇死人了

42
00:03:14,483 --> 00:03:17,723
‎他滿場罵髒話
‎溫布頓會取消他的資格

43
00:03:17,803 --> 00:03:20,043
‎-去他的溫布頓
‎-知道我在說什麼了嗎？

44
00:03:20,123 --> 00:03:23,123
‎這不算什麼
‎他那天在咖啡館對著帶小孩的人吼

45
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,003
‎大家都在看，還罵他是爛人

46
00:03:25,083 --> 00:03:26,563
‎基於很好的理由

47
00:03:26,643 --> 00:03:28,203
‎-什麼理由？
‎-他是爛人

48
00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,483
‎絕對不能這樣說人家

49
00:03:31,563 --> 00:03:35,203
‎顯現詞彙量低落
‎哪個男的用那個字，我馬上拒絕他

50
00:03:35,283 --> 00:03:36,883
‎如果他說希特勒是爛人呢？

51
00:03:36,963 --> 00:03:37,963
‎下重藥講希特勒

52
00:03:38,603 --> 00:03:40,123
‎這不會困擾你吧？

53
00:03:40,203 --> 00:03:43,563
‎不會，但女生不喜歡聽的話
‎我不會在她身邊說

54
00:03:44,163 --> 00:03:48,243
‎所以我要不是在妳身邊不說
‎就是讓妳喜歡這個詞

55
00:03:48,763 --> 00:03:51,963
‎我會讓妳善用這詞彙
‎這會改變妳的一生，相信我

56
00:03:52,043 --> 00:03:55,203
‎-你永遠不會聽到我說那個詞
‎-等著瞧

57
00:03:55,283 --> 00:03:59,523
‎說到詞彙
‎我跟一位老師有約，那就…

58
00:03:59,603 --> 00:04:01,603
‎很好，他教什麼的？

59
00:04:02,323 --> 00:04:03,243
‎不知道，怎麼了？

60
00:04:03,803 --> 00:04:08,683
‎如果是自然科學
‎我可能不會提鬼魂和占星術

61
00:04:08,763 --> 00:04:10,523
‎為什麼？那也是科學

62
00:04:11,563 --> 00:04:12,923
‎不是，真的

63
00:04:13,443 --> 00:04:15,003
‎天秤的兩端，相信我

64
00:04:16,803 --> 00:04:18,002
‎她在這

65
00:04:18,562 --> 00:04:19,963
‎妳好嗎？我有個笑話

66
00:04:20,483 --> 00:04:23,563
‎-雞為什麼要過馬路？
‎-不知道

67
00:04:23,643 --> 00:04:26,403
‎為了遠離兩個吉普賽人
‎和我老婆上床的味道

68
00:04:28,763 --> 00:04:30,843
‎早上八點在喜互惠超市後面

69
00:04:30,923 --> 00:04:32,083
‎噁心

70
00:04:32,163 --> 00:04:35,683
‎你為什麼老是跟我說那些話？
‎根本不好笑

71
00:04:36,403 --> 00:04:37,763
‎現在成了喜劇評論家是吧？

72
00:04:37,843 --> 00:04:39,043
‎還有，這是種族歧視

73
00:04:39,123 --> 00:04:40,803
‎別鬧了，哪有？

74
00:04:41,443 --> 00:04:44,883
‎-“吉普賽人和我老婆上床的味道？”
‎-有味道的是我老婆

75
00:04:44,963 --> 00:04:48,323
‎動動腦袋，她很不注重女性衛生

76
00:04:48,403 --> 00:04:51,163
‎這還要我說嗎？我可是活生生的證明

77
00:04:51,243 --> 00:04:54,443
‎那兩個小子很乖，相當乾淨
‎丹尼李查德和席德納許

78
00:04:54,523 --> 00:04:57,083
‎很討喜的兩個男生，臭的是她

79
00:04:58,123 --> 00:05:01,763
‎我說過她的鮑鮑飄散著鮑味

80
00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:03,203
‎她根本不聽

81
00:05:04,243 --> 00:05:06,683
‎她說：“如果上帝要我有香香的下面

82
00:05:06,763 --> 00:05:08,603
‎祂就不會讓我跟渾球在一起”

83
00:05:08,683 --> 00:05:11,723
‎我知道妳在想什麼
‎“她說的對，布萊恩”

84
00:05:11,803 --> 00:05:12,723
‎才怪咧

85
00:05:12,803 --> 00:05:15,483
‎問題不是她的屁眼，妳想想

86
00:05:17,763 --> 00:05:18,843
‎大夥早

87
00:05:19,763 --> 00:05:20,723
‎你好，布萊恩

88
00:05:22,603 --> 00:05:23,683
‎可以幫我一個忙嗎？

89
00:05:23,763 --> 00:05:24,723
‎看情況

90
00:05:24,803 --> 00:05:28,123
‎我的郵差現在很沮喪

91
00:05:28,203 --> 00:05:31,043
‎他對人生感到低潮

92
00:05:31,123 --> 00:05:36,363
‎我覺得如果他能跟一個很慘的人聊聊

93
00:05:37,043 --> 00:05:40,443
‎他可能會覺得自己沒那麼慘

94
00:05:40,523 --> 00:05:43,083
‎-沒問題，交給我
‎-謝啦

95
00:05:43,843 --> 00:05:45,563
‎我來泡茶喝，午茶時間到了

96
00:05:46,403 --> 00:05:47,803
‎好，打壁球

97
00:05:47,883 --> 00:05:48,763
‎-什麼？
‎-壁球

98
00:05:50,243 --> 00:05:54,243
‎不用了，我證明了我的觀點
‎你說的對，我沒這麼好鬥了

99
00:05:54,323 --> 00:05:55,603
‎-怕了？
‎-不是

100
00:05:55,683 --> 00:05:57,243
‎聽起來你是怕了

101
00:05:57,323 --> 00:05:58,923
‎-不是
‎-壁球讓你太累了？

102
00:05:59,003 --> 00:06:00,283
‎-不是
‎-你以前打過？

103
00:06:00,363 --> 00:06:02,483
‎本世紀沒有，不過那沒差

104
00:06:02,563 --> 00:06:05,243
‎沒差就好，球場見

105
00:06:07,443 --> 00:06:10,123
‎他絕對贏不了，我不可能讓他贏

106
00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:12,883
‎我會想盡辦法，一定讓他…

107
00:06:12,963 --> 00:06:14,763
‎看看他，激動得要命

108
00:06:14,843 --> 00:06:17,443
‎他無法接受，不相信我會打敗他

109
00:06:24,403 --> 00:06:28,563
‎所以你們是青梅竹馬，後來失聯？

110
00:06:28,643 --> 00:06:31,723
‎對，我們認識於1957年

111
00:06:31,803 --> 00:06:35,123
‎我那時16歲，比爾17歲

112
00:06:35,203 --> 00:06:39,003
‎我在工廠工作，比爾是管理員

113
00:06:39,083 --> 00:06:43,243
‎我們在一起大概一年後分開

114
00:06:43,323 --> 00:06:46,363
‎-妳記得原因嗎？
‎-我連早餐吃什麼都忘了

115
00:06:46,443 --> 00:06:49,563
‎他喝太多了，老是在喝酒

116
00:06:49,643 --> 00:06:51,523
‎-我現在不喝了
‎-我喝

117
00:06:52,363 --> 00:06:54,803
‎所以總之，我們算失聯了

118
00:06:54,883 --> 00:06:57,883
‎認識其他人
‎兩人都結婚了，就是這樣

119
00:06:57,963 --> 00:07:01,883
‎這些年來我們碰到彼此兩次吧

120
00:07:01,963 --> 00:07:04,203
‎所以我們發現彼此喪偶時

121
00:07:04,283 --> 00:07:08,083
‎一起喝了杯茶，再次點燃愛火

122
00:07:08,163 --> 00:07:09,723
‎火花永遠不會消失

123
00:07:09,803 --> 00:07:11,843
‎我們本來想省事不結婚

124
00:07:11,923 --> 00:07:15,163
‎但我是天主教徒
‎因為行房而開始感到心不安

125
00:07:15,243 --> 00:07:16,083
‎行房

126
00:07:16,803 --> 00:07:19,643
‎好，婚禮是什麼時候？

127
00:07:20,883 --> 00:07:23,243
‎-8月28日
‎-28日

128
00:07:23,323 --> 00:07:24,963
‎-我八月要結婚
‎-呆瓜

129
00:07:26,403 --> 00:07:30,963
‎恭喜，希望你們能永保幸福

130
00:07:31,043 --> 00:07:32,683
‎希望這次我先走

131
00:07:32,763 --> 00:07:36,083
‎希望我來得及找別人

132
00:07:37,883 --> 00:07:38,723
‎拍張照

133
00:07:40,243 --> 00:07:41,323
‎笑一個

134
00:07:44,523 --> 00:07:45,363
‎太好了

135
00:07:53,763 --> 00:07:55,283
‎我抱莉莎抱得夠嗎？

136
00:07:56,083 --> 00:07:57,323
‎你開什麼玩笑？

137
00:07:58,123 --> 00:07:59,963
‎我沒看過哪對情侶這麼專注於彼此

138
00:08:00,043 --> 00:08:04,363
‎不是，她知道我愛她
‎但我有大聲說出來過嗎？

139
00:08:04,443 --> 00:08:05,843
‎我有一直提醒她嗎？

140
00:08:05,923 --> 00:08:09,923
‎有，明眼人都看得出來，更不用說她

141
00:08:11,363 --> 00:08:12,283
‎你人真好

142
00:08:12,363 --> 00:08:15,043
‎我只是實話實說，這也是我想要的

143
00:08:15,643 --> 00:08:18,123
‎認識阿瓊已經是我這輩子最棒的事了

144
00:08:18,203 --> 00:08:21,083
‎信不信由你，我沒有你想的這麼夯了

145
00:08:22,123 --> 00:08:24,083
‎-你是很好的對象
‎-要抱一下嗎？

146
00:08:24,163 --> 00:08:27,643
‎-不要，離我遠一點，你這臭汗桶
‎-你剛才誇我是好對象

147
00:08:27,723 --> 00:08:30,763
‎對，但我是說在那種深海釣魚節目

148
00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:33,043
‎從海底釣起來的東西

149
00:08:33,643 --> 00:08:34,923
‎人家以為絕種的東西

150
00:08:35,003 --> 00:08:39,003
‎他們根本不曉得那是什麼
‎只知一團肉，可能是魚或蛞蝓

151
00:08:39,523 --> 00:08:40,842
‎又恢復正常了

152
00:08:42,323 --> 00:08:46,043
‎-沒什麼事會恢復正常
‎-靠，我真是自找麻煩？

153
00:08:46,963 --> 00:08:49,923
‎所謂的正常是我們喝醉，你睡在沙發

154
00:08:50,003 --> 00:08:53,483
‎今晚來喝酒吧，沒什麼的，我會回家

155
00:08:56,083 --> 00:08:57,203
‎也好

156
00:09:12,963 --> 00:09:13,803
‎小子

157
00:09:14,603 --> 00:09:15,803
‎-還好嗎？
‎-你好嗎？

158
00:09:15,883 --> 00:09:17,323
‎-好
‎-過得如何？

159
00:09:17,923 --> 00:09:19,283
‎-還行
‎-是嗎？

160
00:09:19,883 --> 00:09:20,843
‎天氣很好吧？

161
00:09:23,803 --> 00:09:25,883
‎-聽說你心情不好
‎-對

162
00:09:25,963 --> 00:09:26,803
‎跟我聊聊

163
00:09:27,723 --> 00:09:30,643
‎大家都知道蘿絲是做什麼的

164
00:09:30,723 --> 00:09:32,803
‎-我覺得很丟臉
‎-丟臉？

165
00:09:32,883 --> 00:09:35,803
‎我送信的對象可能跟她上過床

166
00:09:36,803 --> 00:09:37,643
‎最起碼是

167
00:09:38,883 --> 00:09:41,723
‎-什麼意思？
‎-不曉得是不是銀貨兩訖的交易

168
00:09:42,243 --> 00:09:43,163
‎懂我的意思嗎？

169
00:09:44,203 --> 00:09:46,803
‎你想想，小子，想像她要做多少事

170
00:09:47,323 --> 00:09:50,843
‎傳教士體位沒完沒了，無聊死了

171
00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:52,603
‎“轉過去，給我看屁股”

172
00:09:55,323 --> 00:09:56,203
‎看膩了

173
00:09:56,283 --> 00:09:59,003
‎“轉過來，含住我的棒棒糖”

174
00:09:59,083 --> 00:10:01,843
‎“小心牙齒，別咬到了”

175
00:10:03,083 --> 00:10:05,123
‎“爽啦，好了，錢拿去”

176
00:10:05,203 --> 00:10:07,323
‎“現在回去找你的郵差男友”

177
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:11,283
‎懂我的意思嗎？

178
00:10:13,723 --> 00:10:15,963
‎至少她有收錢

179
00:10:17,083 --> 00:10:18,563
‎我老婆以前都給人免費幹

180
00:10:18,643 --> 00:10:21,563
‎有時偷偷來，有時會叫我幫忙拍

181
00:10:21,643 --> 00:10:24,723
‎我臉往哪擺？
‎我在拍耶，我臉往哪擺？

182
00:10:25,243 --> 00:10:26,243
‎沒用

183
00:10:26,323 --> 00:10:28,803
‎就像吃鳥屎的蛞蝓

184
00:10:28,883 --> 00:10:31,043
‎在雨中，只會被踩到

185
00:10:32,243 --> 00:10:33,443
‎孤獨地等死

186
00:10:34,123 --> 00:10:37,403
‎我是要說，別像我一樣當沒用的蛞蝓

187
00:10:38,403 --> 00:10:39,243
‎當個男子漢

188
00:10:41,403 --> 00:10:42,243
‎回頭見

189
00:10:50,923 --> 00:10:52,603
‎-你好
‎-你好

190
00:10:53,803 --> 00:10:54,923
‎你是我兒子

191
00:10:55,643 --> 00:10:56,483
‎對

192
00:10:57,963 --> 00:10:59,003
‎爸，你好嗎？

193
00:10:59,723 --> 00:11:00,723
‎沒得抱怨

194
00:11:01,723 --> 00:11:03,243
‎你跑去哪了？

195
00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:05,003
‎澳洲

196
00:11:06,443 --> 00:11:07,563
‎那是哪裡？

197
00:11:08,563 --> 00:11:10,883
‎如果你從這裡出去，往左轉

198
00:11:11,683 --> 00:11:13,483
‎大概距離16100公里

199
00:11:13,563 --> 00:11:14,763
‎這樣啊

200
00:11:15,403 --> 00:11:16,763
‎你現在回來了？

201
00:11:17,523 --> 00:11:18,723
‎-對
‎-不走了？

202
00:11:20,203 --> 00:11:21,323
‎-對
‎-你好

203
00:11:21,403 --> 00:11:22,763
‎-妳好
‎-嗨

204
00:11:22,843 --> 00:11:24,323
‎我只是在，妳知道的…

205
00:11:26,203 --> 00:11:27,043
‎聊聊

206
00:11:28,083 --> 00:11:30,843
‎你應該帶西洋棋組給我

207
00:11:31,763 --> 00:11:34,403
‎我擺一局給你
‎你小時候很會下西洋棋

208
00:11:34,483 --> 00:11:36,203
‎-有嗎？
‎-有

209
00:11:36,923 --> 00:11:38,123
‎你放哪？

210
00:11:39,963 --> 00:11:43,203
‎餐具櫃，跟…雪莉酒一起

211
00:11:44,883 --> 00:11:46,963
‎-我明天帶過來
‎-謝謝

212
00:11:48,043 --> 00:11:49,563
‎我還是先走好了，我只是…

213
00:11:49,643 --> 00:11:52,883
‎不介意的話
‎我可以休息一下，陪你走一段

214
00:11:52,963 --> 00:11:54,043
‎好，當然好

215
00:11:55,043 --> 00:11:56,123
‎-再見，爸
‎-再見

216
00:12:05,883 --> 00:12:06,883
‎妳在做什麼？

217
00:12:07,403 --> 00:12:08,643
‎朋友會牽手

218
00:12:08,723 --> 00:12:09,923
‎-會嗎？
‎-會

219
00:12:10,603 --> 00:12:12,803
‎-有些男的還會牽手呢
‎-同志才會

220
00:12:12,883 --> 00:12:15,203
‎直男有時也會牽手

221
00:12:15,283 --> 00:12:18,203
‎哪種直男走在街上會牽手？

222
00:12:18,723 --> 00:12:20,723
‎在西班牙，而且他們不是同志

223
00:12:21,323 --> 00:12:22,283
‎有些是

224
00:12:22,363 --> 00:12:25,883
‎-不是很多，很有男子氣概的鬥牛士
‎-好

225
00:12:27,243 --> 00:12:28,363
‎鬥牛士不是同志

226
00:12:28,443 --> 00:12:32,403
‎不是，戴著貝雷帽，穿著亮片緊身裝

227
00:12:32,483 --> 00:12:34,763
‎四處跳舞，有人拿玫瑰花丟向他們

228
00:12:34,843 --> 00:12:35,843
‎絕對不會是同志

229
00:12:36,363 --> 00:12:37,683
‎施虐成性的蠢蛋

230
00:12:38,723 --> 00:12:40,763
‎但不是同志，我們要去哪？

231
00:13:01,683 --> 00:13:03,603
‎-妳在做什麼？
‎-水仙花

232
00:13:04,123 --> 00:13:05,443
‎對，這是刑事損害

233
00:13:06,203 --> 00:13:09,203
‎媽的，我是要採給你的
‎你這沒救的王八蛋

234
00:13:14,763 --> 00:13:16,203
‎好，大家來吧

235
00:13:16,723 --> 00:13:18,883
‎你們有些可能知道

236
00:13:18,963 --> 00:13:23,083
‎這是坦伯里市集的500週年慶

237
00:13:23,163 --> 00:13:25,003
‎像我這樣的傻瓜要求

238
00:13:25,083 --> 00:13:27,683
‎坦伯里戲劇社
‎一定要為活動增添文化氣息

239
00:13:28,403 --> 00:13:30,003
‎我已經說服柯琳

240
00:13:30,083 --> 00:13:32,803
‎她會負責幕後花絮的籌劃

241
00:13:32,883 --> 00:13:35,803
‎還會幫我們拍一部大長片

242
00:13:36,843 --> 00:13:39,323
‎我很會讓大家注意我們，對吧？

243
00:13:39,403 --> 00:13:42,003
‎快想想要做什麼？我們需要一些點子

244
00:13:42,523 --> 00:13:46,003
‎-有想法嗎？跟歷史有關的
‎-《悲慘世界》

245
00:13:46,083 --> 00:13:49,283
‎《悲慘世界》的背景不是過去
‎我們不能拍那個

246
00:13:49,363 --> 00:13:51,043
‎我可不會付錢，管他的

247
00:13:51,123 --> 00:13:53,003
‎《艾薇塔》已經讓我付到受不了了

248
00:13:53,563 --> 00:13:55,003
‎現在還在付錢

249
00:13:55,083 --> 00:13:59,083
‎不行，我們需要能互動的東西
‎能讓你們走來走去

250
00:13:59,163 --> 00:14:00,763
‎有遊行的感覺

251
00:14:00,843 --> 00:14:04,643
‎大家走向你
‎有維京海盜走過來，姦淫擄掠

252
00:14:04,723 --> 00:14:05,723
‎不是真的啦

253
00:14:05,803 --> 00:14:08,723
‎有僧人走向你，祝福你，過去那一套

254
00:14:08,803 --> 00:14:12,483
‎海盜船，我不知道，豬，有豬到處跑

255
00:14:12,563 --> 00:14:14,243
‎這樣好嗎？我不知道

256
00:14:14,323 --> 00:14:17,443
‎快說點什麼，不能只有我說
‎我們還有什麼點子？

257
00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:19,603
‎我可以演失業的莎翁劇演員

258
00:14:21,083 --> 00:14:22,923
‎別開始抱怨，詹姆士

259
00:14:23,483 --> 00:14:26,883
‎這是大家的休閒娛樂
‎我們放棄自己的時間來這

260
00:14:26,963 --> 00:14:28,923
‎但你不用送報紙

261
00:14:29,003 --> 00:14:30,843
‎你也不用，你幾乎都丟掉了

262
00:14:33,803 --> 00:14:36,643
‎聽著，我過得不是很順…

263
00:14:36,723 --> 00:14:38,923
‎你沒順過，詹姆士，你在說什麼？

264
00:14:39,003 --> 00:14:41,203
‎那我怎麼辦？我選你等於押錯寶

265
00:14:41,283 --> 00:14:43,123
‎我有點擔心他

266
00:14:43,203 --> 00:14:46,363
‎因為沒有表演，他無事可做

267
00:14:46,443 --> 00:14:49,203
‎這就是表演，你還有什麼好要求的？

268
00:14:49,283 --> 00:14:51,283
‎但這只是演好玩的，這全都是

269
00:14:51,363 --> 00:14:54,403
‎演好玩的？你膽大包天

270
00:14:54,483 --> 00:14:57,403
‎我可是專業演員兼導演，我先說清楚

271
00:14:57,483 --> 00:15:02,163
‎-你演過什麼？
‎-《計程車司機》，音樂劇的，威根

272
00:15:02,803 --> 00:15:03,683
‎有紅嗎？

273
00:15:03,763 --> 00:15:05,203
‎你說說看啊

274
00:15:05,723 --> 00:15:08,803
‎你在跟我說話嗎？因為我在跟你說話

275
00:15:08,883 --> 00:15:11,763
‎我沒看到有人可以跟你說話

276
00:15:11,843 --> 00:15:12,683
‎碰碰

277
00:15:12,763 --> 00:15:14,483
‎我是計程車司機

278
00:15:15,083 --> 00:15:17,803
‎在晚上排班，看順眼的才載

279
00:15:17,883 --> 00:15:18,723
‎碰碰

280
00:15:18,803 --> 00:15:20,443
‎我是計程車司機

281
00:15:21,043 --> 00:15:25,043
‎如果你販毒，那就準備後腦吃子彈

282
00:15:25,123 --> 00:15:25,963
‎就是今晚

283
00:15:26,483 --> 00:15:27,403
‎計程車

284
00:15:31,323 --> 00:15:32,443
‎他很厲害

285
00:15:51,803 --> 00:15:55,403
‎-大家不彈手指叫服務生了，你好
‎-要給你酒單嗎？

286
00:15:56,043 --> 00:15:58,003
‎是“我可以拿酒單給您嗎？”

287
00:15:58,083 --> 00:15:59,203
‎-不好意思
‎-謝謝

288
00:16:01,203 --> 00:16:02,483
‎妳對酒熟嗎？

289
00:16:03,603 --> 00:16:05,643
‎不太熟，我喜歡普羅賽克氣泡酒

290
00:16:06,963 --> 00:16:08,403
‎-要我點嗎？
‎-好

291
00:16:09,003 --> 00:16:12,563
‎可以給我們兩杯

292
00:16:12,643 --> 00:16:16,923
‎2017年的古典奇揚地嗎？麻煩你

293
00:16:17,003 --> 00:16:19,923
‎-之後我們再看看
‎-哪一個？

294
00:16:21,243 --> 00:16:25,883
‎我說得很清楚，2017年的古典奇揚地

295
00:16:25,963 --> 00:16:28,243
‎白紙黑字寫在酒單上

296
00:16:28,323 --> 00:16:30,203
‎-好
‎-要充分了解你的工作

297
00:16:32,003 --> 00:16:35,083
‎如果你沒有心，也許不該在這

298
00:16:36,243 --> 00:16:37,563
‎我拿最低工資，老兄

299
00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:39,723
‎用功唸書，老兄

300
00:16:41,603 --> 00:16:43,643
‎他走了，逃之夭夭

301
00:16:44,163 --> 00:16:48,963
‎所以妳在…
‎手肘不要靠桌上，妳在報業任職？

302
00:16:49,043 --> 00:16:50,483
‎-對
‎-報業人員？

303
00:16:52,603 --> 00:16:53,683
‎對

304
00:16:55,283 --> 00:16:56,843
‎我只看《衛報》

305
00:16:58,043 --> 00:17:01,123
‎偶爾會看《私家偵探》
‎但即使是這樣我還是會換著看

306
00:17:01,683 --> 00:17:04,882
‎我喜歡稱我的大腦為創意大腦

307
00:17:06,323 --> 00:17:07,443
‎我有寫詩

308
00:17:09,763 --> 00:17:10,642
‎妳喜歡詩嗎？

309
00:17:12,203 --> 00:17:13,122
‎-喜歡
‎-對

310
00:17:14,162 --> 00:17:16,043
‎-喜歡嗎？
‎-對

311
00:17:16,683 --> 00:17:18,443
‎很多人都說自己喜歡詩

312
00:17:18,523 --> 00:17:22,162
‎但他們說的是
‎喜歡魯德亞德吉卜林的《假如》

313
00:17:22,243 --> 00:17:25,362
‎他們覺得這樣說是高級藝術的表現

314
00:17:26,283 --> 00:17:28,122
‎就像有人說會下…手肘

315
00:17:28,203 --> 00:17:30,043
‎就像有人說會下棋

316
00:17:30,123 --> 00:17:33,803
‎但他們其實是在說
‎他們知道棋子能怎麼走

317
00:17:37,163 --> 00:17:38,043
‎妳喜歡下棋嗎？

318
00:17:38,123 --> 00:17:41,403
‎-我不…不下棋
‎-妳不下棋，很好

319
00:17:41,483 --> 00:17:44,403
‎-那妳知道棋子怎麼走嗎？
‎-我知道幾個

320
00:17:44,483 --> 00:17:45,323
‎很好

321
00:17:46,243 --> 00:17:47,763
‎-幾個
‎-妳說什麼？

322
00:17:49,203 --> 00:17:51,563
‎西洋棋裡有馬，小馬

323
00:17:51,643 --> 00:17:52,963
‎有騎士

324
00:17:53,043 --> 00:17:55,763
‎-還有…餅？
‎-兵

325
00:17:56,723 --> 00:17:57,883
‎我下的是英國跳棋

326
00:17:57,963 --> 00:17:59,483
‎跳棋不是比較簡單嗎？

327
00:17:59,563 --> 00:18:01,003
‎跳棋是很簡單的遊戲

328
00:18:10,163 --> 00:18:11,003
‎好乖

329
00:18:16,483 --> 00:18:18,083
‎這是你一日五蔬果的其中一份

330
00:18:18,603 --> 00:18:20,003
‎-葡萄
‎-對，正解

331
00:18:21,723 --> 00:18:22,963
‎-敬你
‎-敬你

332
00:18:28,123 --> 00:18:30,243
‎-你沒事吧？
‎-對，我很好，你好嗎？

333
00:18:30,923 --> 00:18:33,003
‎我有件事想問你

334
00:18:33,683 --> 00:18:36,323
‎-好
‎-拒絕沒關係，這沒什麼

335
00:18:36,843 --> 00:18:39,803
‎但你是否願意在我的婚禮上當伴郎

336
00:18:41,923 --> 00:18:42,763
‎幹

337
00:18:44,443 --> 00:18:45,963
‎我真的是最佳人選嗎？

338
00:18:46,043 --> 00:18:48,283
‎-你萬中選一，我說真的
‎-好

339
00:18:49,643 --> 00:18:50,483
‎好

340
00:18:54,403 --> 00:18:57,443
‎我不答應也不行吧？

341
00:18:58,483 --> 00:18:59,883
‎如果我還活著的話就答應你

342
00:19:00,603 --> 00:19:02,563
‎-你還把死掛嘴邊？
‎-沒有

343
00:19:03,323 --> 00:19:06,083
‎我吃多喝多，說不定活不到八月

344
00:19:06,163 --> 00:19:09,323
‎好，只要你是自然死亡就沒關係

345
00:19:10,363 --> 00:19:11,763
‎我也這樣希望

346
00:19:13,043 --> 00:19:16,483
‎我寧可去死也不要當伴郎

347
00:19:20,363 --> 00:19:22,523
‎我受寵若驚，真要命

348
00:19:22,603 --> 00:19:24,203
‎我一定要滴酒不沾嗎？

349
00:19:25,163 --> 00:19:27,003
‎可能要撐到致詞

350
00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:29,643
‎先致詞再舉行儀式吧

351
00:19:29,723 --> 00:19:30,843
‎好，也行

352
00:19:30,923 --> 00:19:32,403
‎你別鬧了，我們就…

353
00:19:39,403 --> 00:19:41,363
‎你教自然科學嗎？

354
00:19:41,443 --> 00:19:42,283
‎沒有

355
00:19:42,883 --> 00:19:48,443
‎我從事藝術方面的教學

356
00:19:48,523 --> 00:19:49,363
‎我教英文

357
00:19:50,003 --> 00:19:52,883
‎-語言及文學，終於合而為一
‎-那很好

358
00:19:54,163 --> 00:19:56,123
‎-我喜歡占星術
‎-不好意思？

359
00:19:56,643 --> 00:19:58,003
‎我喜歡占…

360
00:19:58,083 --> 00:19:59,363
‎-占星術
‎-對

361
00:20:01,683 --> 00:20:04,443
‎-你呢？
‎-我喜歡占星術嗎？

362
00:20:05,683 --> 00:20:07,963
‎-對
‎-不行，肯定不喜歡

363
00:20:09,203 --> 00:20:10,363
‎胡言亂語，亂七八糟

364
00:20:12,323 --> 00:20:13,283
‎一廂情願的想法

365
00:20:14,003 --> 00:20:16,083
‎給腦波弱、走投無路的人

366
00:20:16,163 --> 00:20:17,043
‎沒別的意思

367
00:20:18,163 --> 00:20:19,083
‎坐挺

368
00:20:19,883 --> 00:20:22,483
‎肩膀往後，手肘離開桌子，不能放

369
00:20:26,803 --> 00:20:29,803
‎-你期待嗎？婚姻生活？
‎-那當然

370
00:20:29,883 --> 00:20:33,683
‎對，一定的，我都放棄拈花惹草了

371
00:20:34,523 --> 00:20:36,523
‎但利大於弊

372
00:20:37,163 --> 00:20:38,003
‎很好

373
00:20:38,083 --> 00:20:41,843
‎例如我以前會看整晚的電視、吃東西

374
00:20:41,923 --> 00:20:44,043
‎我現在還是會

375
00:20:44,123 --> 00:20:47,323
‎但我不用站起來拿食物，她會拿給我

376
00:20:47,963 --> 00:20:50,603
‎-很好
‎-不得不看女生的節目

377
00:20:51,563 --> 00:20:52,563
‎例如什麼？

378
00:20:52,643 --> 00:20:55,683
‎《王冠》、《邋遢女郎》
‎《英國烘焙大賽》

379
00:20:55,763 --> 00:20:57,843
‎但要是我看到喜歡的蛋糕

380
00:20:57,923 --> 00:21:01,003
‎只要說：“看起來很好吃”
‎我知道隔天就會吃到

381
00:21:01,083 --> 00:21:04,643
‎所以《英國烘焙大賽》
‎對你而言就像購物頻道？

382
00:21:04,723 --> 00:21:06,723
‎-對
‎-不可思議，好棒的人生

383
00:21:08,043 --> 00:21:10,323
‎往前兩步，往右一步

384
00:21:10,403 --> 00:21:11,243
‎手肘

385
00:21:12,403 --> 00:21:13,363
‎謝謝

386
00:21:14,083 --> 00:21:15,523
‎-我來付
‎-太好了

387
00:21:15,603 --> 00:21:16,963
‎小費給妳出

388
00:21:17,483 --> 00:21:19,243
‎-多少錢？
‎-38英鎊

389
00:21:20,323 --> 00:21:22,523
‎-好
‎-百分之15

390
00:21:24,043 --> 00:21:24,923
‎所以是？

391
00:21:30,803 --> 00:21:32,763
‎38的百分之10是多少？

392
00:21:35,483 --> 00:21:36,563
‎3鎊80便士

393
00:21:36,643 --> 00:21:37,643
‎3鎊80便士，她算好了

394
00:21:38,323 --> 00:21:40,523
‎那再加百分之50呢？

395
00:21:41,203 --> 00:21:42,323
‎我就拿五英鎊鈔票吧

396
00:21:43,243 --> 00:21:44,403
‎這樣還不夠吧？

397
00:21:45,203 --> 00:21:46,923
‎-那就10英鎊鈔票吧
‎-超過太多了

398
00:21:47,003 --> 00:21:48,963
‎-我給小費很大方，行嗎？
‎-好

399
00:21:49,643 --> 00:21:51,323
‎好了，這裡有什麼卡呢？

400
00:21:52,003 --> 00:21:55,483
‎匯豐銀行、運籌理財英國記帳卡

401
00:21:56,723 --> 00:21:57,563
‎小鬍子

402
00:21:58,683 --> 00:22:00,123
‎小鬍子？

403
00:22:07,283 --> 00:22:09,883
‎-你最近好像比較開心了
‎-有嗎？

404
00:22:11,403 --> 00:22:12,243
‎有

405
00:22:13,083 --> 00:22:15,083
‎我只想繼續過日子

406
00:22:15,163 --> 00:22:17,403
‎我當然想好起來

407
00:22:18,643 --> 00:22:20,243
‎我想當好人

408
00:22:21,803 --> 00:22:22,763
‎但有時候

409
00:22:23,723 --> 00:22:25,083
‎我就是懶

410
00:22:25,603 --> 00:22:27,083
‎太難了

411
00:22:27,163 --> 00:22:29,843
‎我們說的頭頭是道，但說到重點時

412
00:22:31,043 --> 00:22:35,483
‎我們都會逃避真正的犧牲，例如說

413
00:22:36,283 --> 00:22:38,003
‎我會把腎給陌生人嗎？

414
00:22:38,083 --> 00:22:40,363
‎不會，絕對不會

415
00:22:41,323 --> 00:22:43,883
‎我不會給你，但有些人會

416
00:22:44,483 --> 00:22:45,843
‎他們怎麼會這麼好？

417
00:22:46,363 --> 00:22:47,843
‎這真的很了不起

418
00:22:47,923 --> 00:22:51,243
‎我想做點好事，你知道嗎？

419
00:22:51,323 --> 00:22:53,283
‎我想犧牲，我想

420
00:22:54,003 --> 00:22:55,523
‎有一番作為

421
00:22:56,443 --> 00:22:57,443
‎但後來我又想

422
00:22:58,283 --> 00:22:59,403
‎“這樣有什麼意義？”

423
00:22:59,923 --> 00:23:01,763
‎所以我把腎給別人

424
00:23:02,803 --> 00:23:05,363
‎但他們橫豎有一天會死，所以

425
00:23:06,363 --> 00:23:07,443
‎誰會在意？

426
00:23:08,163 --> 00:23:10,083
‎我現在看到小孩在玩，我不會想說

427
00:23:10,163 --> 00:23:12,163
‎“他們前途一片光明”

428
00:23:12,243 --> 00:23:15,723
‎我會想說：“他們總有一天會死
‎所以這一切沒有意義”

429
00:23:15,803 --> 00:23:18,243
‎你會讓我改伴郎致詞嗎？

430
00:23:20,603 --> 00:23:23,723
‎但我要說的應該是我不再在意死亡

431
00:23:23,803 --> 00:23:25,723
‎我不是說我想死，我是說…

432
00:23:26,683 --> 00:23:27,523
‎隨便啦

433
00:23:27,603 --> 00:23:30,803
‎我不生氣了，我不想懲罰這個世界

434
00:23:31,323 --> 00:23:34,043
‎我有過好生活，什麼都不缺

435
00:23:34,563 --> 00:23:38,443
‎我討厭別人認為我可以再找到別人

436
00:23:38,523 --> 00:23:40,483
‎好像我可以取代莉莎，我做不到

437
00:23:41,083 --> 00:23:42,203
‎這點我可以接受

438
00:23:42,723 --> 00:23:47,243
‎因為這會讓我跟她的時間更彌足珍貴

439
00:23:47,323 --> 00:23:49,603
‎我現在有的一切歸功於她

440
00:23:49,683 --> 00:23:53,723
‎她還清房貸、買了壽險

441
00:23:55,243 --> 00:23:57,763
‎我有15萬英鎊還沒…

442
00:23:58,683 --> 00:23:59,763
‎我還沒去領

443
00:23:59,843 --> 00:24:01,923
‎你有15萬英鎊？

444
00:24:02,803 --> 00:24:04,403
‎對，我還沒兌現支票

445
00:24:05,203 --> 00:24:07,123
‎因為我不想要那筆錢

446
00:24:08,323 --> 00:24:09,163
‎因為

447
00:24:10,203 --> 00:24:11,083
‎那筆錢的由來

448
00:24:12,443 --> 00:24:14,643
‎東尼，拜託說你會去領

449
00:24:14,723 --> 00:24:17,763
‎就算從保險公司那拿錢也好

450
00:24:19,203 --> 00:24:21,283
‎可以去應門嗎？這樣我才不會吵醒狗

451
00:24:21,363 --> 00:24:22,963
‎-什麼啦？
‎-快去

452
00:24:29,163 --> 00:24:30,323
‎-妳好嗎？
‎-嗨

453
00:24:32,043 --> 00:24:32,883
‎是凱絲

454
00:24:37,163 --> 00:24:38,003
‎妳還好嗎？

455
00:24:38,603 --> 00:24:40,323
‎-很好
‎-約會順利嗎？

456
00:24:44,523 --> 00:24:45,723
‎我無法形容

457
00:24:46,843 --> 00:24:47,683
‎他是怎樣的人？

458
00:24:48,803 --> 00:24:50,043
‎絕對是爛人

459
00:24:52,363 --> 00:24:54,803
‎我真以妳為榮，要喝酒嗎？

460
00:24:55,443 --> 00:24:57,683
‎-好，麻煩你
‎-可以幫凱絲拿個杯子嗎？

461
00:24:58,203 --> 00:24:59,923
‎-什麼啦？
‎-別這樣，我沒辦法

462
00:25:00,523 --> 00:25:02,323
‎注意態度

463
00:26:03,563 --> 00:26:04,963
‎字幕翻譯：林佩孜