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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
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- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -
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Oh! Oh my god.
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Oh, my... I'm not even in the house.
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I'm fucking soaked.
5
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I'm not even in the house. How
long have you had that there?
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About 40 minutes, right. 'Cause
I was just waiting like a dog
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- at the window.
- You prick.
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I can't believe that I'm soaked!
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- Ahh, tough day at work?
- No.
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Really easy day at work.
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No. Tough time the second
I get into my own house.
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Look at how happy you are.
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Good girl.
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- Are you goin' in there?
- Yeah.
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- Can you give that to him?
- Yeah, course.
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Ta.
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- You're a friend of his are you?
- Yeah.
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Oh.
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- All right?
- Some post.
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- Where d'you get that?
- Postman gave it to me.
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What? Oh, for f...
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Should've made him put
it through the letterbox.
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I was walking along the side of the
road 'cause there was no pavement.
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I slipped down this steep
bank and onto some rubbish...
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big chunk of wood with, like, a nail,
metal spike sticking out of it...
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and went right on it.
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Well, it just went right through
me, right through me side,
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out me back.
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There was blood everywhere.
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It's a miracle I'm still alive
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'cause the doctor said,
because I'm so big,
32
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it just went straight through me
33
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and missed me vital organs.
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- You know, just straight through the...
- Flab.
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So, in a way, my fatness saved my life.
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Not really.
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If you'd have been thin,
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the spike would have missed
you altogether, wouldn't it?
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You'd just be lying next
to a spike. Not a problem.
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Hmm.
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Cheers.
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Good pictures.
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Lisa's old room.
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Ahh.
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Hungry?
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Stupid question.
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Thought you were gonna
grab the back of my neck.
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Not yet.
49
00:03:31,045 --> 00:03:34,325
Say you wanna use this
photo here, you just...
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00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:39,445
take the file P100124.jpg,
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00:03:39,525 --> 00:03:43,325
and you just drag it across and
pop it in the folder and it uploads.
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That's done. And then
check the next image.
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Looks like P100125.jpg.
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You just click it, move it
across, pop it in the folder.
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Fuck me!
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Why do you wanna work here?
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- It's exciting.
- What is?
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Journalism.
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00:04:03,085 --> 00:04:05,645
- This isn't fucking journalism.
- You've gotta start somewhere.
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Yeah, but if you start
here, you'll end here.
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Look at this.
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Not true, actually, no.
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00:04:10,725 --> 00:04:12,565
No, this is a great
stepping stone, this place.
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There was a guy who
worked here a while ago,
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- went on to work for The Guardian.
- What was his name?
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00:04:18,085 --> 00:04:20,525
- No, I can't remember his name.
- Oh, he made it big then?
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- The point is...
- Bill Coombes.
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Wasn't here long.
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Was a bit grabby.
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I do get that a lot though.
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He's a lorry driver now.
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Since the court case.
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I didn't know that.
But the point is, okay,
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you start here, then you go on to
have a bright future in journalism.
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00:04:43,325 --> 00:04:44,965
There is no bright future in journalism.
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00:04:45,045 --> 00:04:47,501
By the time you're a features
writer, there won't be newspapers
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as we know them because it'll just
be a shit storm on the Internet.
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People posting nasty, fucking hateful
opinions that aren't even theirs
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'cause their editor told them to,
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to get clickbait for fucking advertisers
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because the world is
full of fuckin' morons.
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It's awful. It's an awful future.
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Tell you what, misery guts.
This might cheer you up... um...
84
00:05:07,525 --> 00:05:09,085
Just been speaking to Jill,
85
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and we might've got you a date.
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- For what?
- For...
87
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- Well, we know a lovely lady...
- Oh, a date?
88
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- Yeah.
- Forget it!
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Well, hang on. She's also a widow.
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00:05:19,485 --> 00:05:20,925
So we'd have a lot in common?
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00:05:21,005 --> 00:05:22,605
- I've told her all about you...
- Yeah?
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You told her I'm still married?
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- Well, no. I mean...
- To your sister.
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- No.
- Have you forgotten that?
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00:05:27,405 --> 00:05:29,165
Because I haven't. I
still know the deal.
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00:05:29,565 --> 00:05:33,565
I'm just getting on with stuff to
keep you off my back until it's time.
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00:05:33,645 --> 00:05:35,725
Because when you see me,
for one moment you think
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I look like I'm enjoying
myself for a split second,
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know that in there I'm still fucking
in pain and the moment's ruined
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'cause I can't share it with her, okay?
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And I can't fucking wait to be with her.
102
00:05:45,645 --> 00:05:48,165
Tony, that doesn't make
sense. You're a rational man.
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You don't even believe in an afterlife.
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I know. She's nowhere, all right?
But get this through your head...
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I'd rather be nowhere with her than
somewhere without her, all right?
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Fucking hell. Why can't
you just leave me alone?
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Oh, God.
108
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I've been getting a bit of pressure...
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to maybe start dating again.
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I say "again." I've never dated.
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I don't see the point.
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I met someone, by chance,
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and she turned out to be perfect,
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and... I can't see that
ever happening again.
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What about just...
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- having fun?
- It won't be fun.
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Yeah, again, shit attitude, mate.
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All this, "Oh, where's my soulmate?"
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I'm not even sure it's natural
for us to have one mate for life.
120
00:07:07,645 --> 00:07:10,325
It's pretty rare in most
species, I've gotta tell you.
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There is... an Australian mouse.
122
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Now, the male lives for a year,
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because as soon as it becomes
an adult and it wants to mate,
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it goes out and mates...
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with about a hundred females.
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Literally, it gets the horn,
127
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and it thinks, "Right, I'm gonna
shag everything that moves."
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And it does.
129
00:07:32,765 --> 00:07:35,965
You know, there's no wooing,
there's no "Are we compatible?"
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"Is she my soulmate?"
There's none of that.
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He's just on her, whether
she likes it or not.
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I mean, it's basically rape, yeah?
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But there's no silly outcry.
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And then...
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exhausted...
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dead.
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That's ã68, please.
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00:07:58,045 --> 00:07:59,645
Any plans for the weekend?
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Gonna rape myself to death.
140
00:08:10,045 --> 00:08:11,285
- Hi.
- Hello.
141
00:08:11,365 --> 00:08:13,365
- Where's the other one?
- Which one?
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Scottish, mouthy.
143
00:08:15,645 --> 00:08:17,805
Emma. Do you want to speak to her?
144
00:08:17,885 --> 00:08:19,925
Err... yeah, please.
145
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Cheers.
146
00:08:23,765 --> 00:08:24,765
You all right, Dad?
147
00:08:28,525 --> 00:08:30,845
- Did you... wanna see me?
- Yeah.
148
00:08:33,005 --> 00:08:34,005
I'm sorry.
149
00:08:34,685 --> 00:08:35,725
What for?
150
00:08:36,125 --> 00:08:37,205
Doesn't matter, apparently.
151
00:08:37,245 --> 00:08:39,365
- What doesn't matter?
- Why I'm apologizing.
152
00:08:40,325 --> 00:08:41,725
I'm apologizing for...
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being an arsehole in general.
154
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Oh... right.
155
00:08:47,645 --> 00:08:50,725
So are you apologizing for
being an arsehole so far,
156
00:08:50,805 --> 00:08:53,605
or are you apologizing in advance?
157
00:08:58,405 --> 00:09:01,045
I think you do a great
job with my dad, and...
158
00:09:02,085 --> 00:09:03,925
I don't spend enough time with him.
159
00:09:04,005 --> 00:09:05,685
All right. Fine.
160
00:09:06,685 --> 00:09:08,045
I wouldn't worry about your dad.
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Cheers.
162
00:09:10,165 --> 00:09:11,165
Yeah...
163
00:09:12,005 --> 00:09:13,005
about your dad.
164
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You upset quite a few people
today, didn't you, Ray?
165
00:09:18,125 --> 00:09:19,125
How?
166
00:09:19,325 --> 00:09:23,325
Well, he told Ireney Tindall that
he'd like to do her from behind.
167
00:09:24,525 --> 00:09:26,005
Why from behind?
168
00:09:26,085 --> 00:09:28,405
- I don't really think that's the issue.
- No, sure...
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00:09:28,485 --> 00:09:29,885
- Ugly.
- Oh right.
170
00:09:30,325 --> 00:09:33,765
And he accused Charlie Willis
of sucking off Elton John.
171
00:09:34,285 --> 00:09:35,885
How old's Charlie Willis?
172
00:09:35,965 --> 00:09:37,245
Eighty nine.
173
00:09:37,325 --> 00:09:38,645
Dirty bastard.
174
00:09:39,925 --> 00:09:43,405
- Anything else? Please say yes.
- Oh, yeah. He told Winston Freeman
175
00:09:43,485 --> 00:09:45,885
that he has the cock of a Chinaman.
176
00:09:45,965 --> 00:09:48,070
How do you know what a Chinaman's co...
177
00:09:48,071 --> 00:09:49,805
You shouldn't even say Chinaman, Dad.
178
00:09:52,965 --> 00:09:55,085
Ahh.
179
00:09:56,565 --> 00:09:57,765
- Oh.
- Oh.
180
00:10:01,405 --> 00:10:02,525
That's cheered me up.
181
00:10:02,805 --> 00:10:03,805
Tough day at work?
182
00:10:05,565 --> 00:10:06,565
I...
183
00:10:07,565 --> 00:10:10,725
Some of the guys are trying
to get me to go on a date.
184
00:10:10,805 --> 00:10:11,805
Mmm.
185
00:10:12,525 --> 00:10:15,605
Well, you should probably
go on a date, then.
186
00:10:17,365 --> 00:10:19,925
- Right, I'd better get back to work.
- Oh, okay.
187
00:10:20,005 --> 00:10:21,565
- All right, bye.
- Cheers.
188
00:10:22,845 --> 00:10:24,525
All right, Ireney?
189
00:10:29,125 --> 00:10:30,205
Here she is.
190
00:10:30,765 --> 00:10:32,365
Get in here, you dirty cow.
191
00:10:36,525 --> 00:10:38,925
My brother-in-law wants
me to try dating again.
192
00:10:39,845 --> 00:10:42,005
Oh, excellent.
193
00:10:42,805 --> 00:10:44,005
You need some tips.
194
00:10:45,445 --> 00:10:46,525
Why would I need some tips?
195
00:10:46,605 --> 00:10:48,605
Well, I imagine you're awful with women.
196
00:10:49,605 --> 00:10:50,605
Yeah?
197
00:10:50,965 --> 00:10:52,165
She's having a go, Stan.
198
00:10:52,645 --> 00:10:54,005
Well, all men are awful,
199
00:10:54,085 --> 00:10:56,205
but grumpy, selfish ones are the worst.
200
00:10:56,285 --> 00:10:59,165
Oh, all right. Let me take
notes. This is dynamite. Go on.
201
00:10:59,965 --> 00:11:03,285
Well, go on. What are you going
to say to her? I'll be your date.
202
00:11:04,445 --> 00:11:05,565
What, role-play?
203
00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:07,165
If you like.
204
00:11:14,245 --> 00:11:16,125
Hi, I'm Tony.
205
00:11:17,605 --> 00:11:19,365
I don't wanna appear ageist,
206
00:11:19,765 --> 00:11:23,005
but are those your own teeth?
207
00:11:24,365 --> 00:11:26,245
That's probably a bad
start, is it, getting hit?
208
00:11:26,285 --> 00:11:27,365
No.
209
00:11:28,005 --> 00:11:29,485
It's good. You made me laugh,
210
00:11:29,565 --> 00:11:32,845
but I'm assuming that your
date isn't as old as me.
211
00:11:32,925 --> 00:11:33,925
Fuckin' hope not.
212
00:11:35,805 --> 00:11:38,245
Swearing. Be serious!
213
00:11:38,325 --> 00:11:39,525
I can't. I...
214
00:11:40,445 --> 00:11:41,565
I'd just be honest.
215
00:11:42,125 --> 00:11:44,685
Tell her my situation, tell
her what I'm going through,
216
00:11:44,765 --> 00:11:46,045
be honest up front, and...
217
00:11:47,485 --> 00:11:49,085
So just all about you, then?
218
00:11:49,605 --> 00:11:51,605
What? I can't win, can I?
219
00:11:51,925 --> 00:11:53,405
I don't wanna date again.
220
00:11:54,125 --> 00:11:55,805
I don't wanna live without Lisa.
221
00:11:57,485 --> 00:11:59,445
But it's not just all about you, is it?
222
00:12:00,165 --> 00:12:01,325
That's what I'm saying.
223
00:12:02,125 --> 00:12:05,245
What if a nice date made her feel good?
224
00:12:06,445 --> 00:12:08,045
That might feel nice, right?
225
00:12:09,245 --> 00:12:11,765
We're not just here for
us, we're here for others.
226
00:12:11,845 --> 00:12:13,525
I don't do the whole
God thing, I'm afraid.
227
00:12:13,605 --> 00:12:15,365
No, neither do I. Load of rubbish.
228
00:12:15,445 --> 00:12:17,045
All we've got is each other.
229
00:12:17,605 --> 00:12:20,045
We've got to help each other
struggle through till we die,
230
00:12:20,125 --> 00:12:21,325
and then we're done.
231
00:12:21,405 --> 00:12:23,085
No point in feeling sorry for ourselves
232
00:12:23,165 --> 00:12:24,885
and making everyone else unhappy, too.
233
00:12:24,965 --> 00:12:27,045
Might as well top yourself
if you feel like that.
234
00:12:28,205 --> 00:12:30,645
Are you sure you wanna
work for the Samaritans?
235
00:12:30,725 --> 00:12:32,445
All I'm saying is that...
236
00:12:32,525 --> 00:12:34,165
I think that deep down,
237
00:12:34,845 --> 00:12:37,045
that you still think
life's worth living.
238
00:12:37,125 --> 00:12:39,125
It's nowhere near over for you.
239
00:12:40,125 --> 00:12:41,125
You're in pain.
240
00:12:43,445 --> 00:12:44,725
But the thing you lost...
241
00:12:45,605 --> 00:12:47,725
is the same thing that
can stop that pain.
242
00:13:03,685 --> 00:13:05,805
- I'm sorry.
- It's fine, seriously.
243
00:13:05,885 --> 00:13:06,885
No, it's... I...
244
00:13:07,605 --> 00:13:08,605
I shouldn't have...
245
00:13:09,925 --> 00:13:10,925
I'll...
246
00:13:11,405 --> 00:13:13,125
I'll do the date.
247
00:13:13,805 --> 00:13:14,965
Really?
248
00:13:15,045 --> 00:13:17,925
Great. Well, I'll call
her and book a restaurant.
249
00:13:19,125 --> 00:13:20,125
Indian okay?
250
00:13:20,525 --> 00:13:22,085
Yeah. I don't care what she is.
251
00:13:23,325 --> 00:13:25,005
No, I meant... food.
252
00:13:25,365 --> 00:13:27,125
Oh... Err...
253
00:13:27,525 --> 00:13:30,565
No, Italian'd be best.
Soak up the alcohol.
254
00:13:31,845 --> 00:13:33,285
Okay. Yeah, I'll book that.
255
00:13:34,045 --> 00:13:35,045
Great.
256
00:13:39,365 --> 00:13:40,725
So, what are you gonna wear?
257
00:13:41,885 --> 00:13:44,205
- Why?
- Well, first impressions are important.
258
00:13:44,285 --> 00:13:45,725
I mean, look at me and June.
259
00:13:46,245 --> 00:13:48,765
She'd noticed my style
before my personality.
260
00:13:49,045 --> 00:13:50,795
I don't care about first impre...
261
00:13:50,796 --> 00:13:52,605
I don't care about any impression, do I?
262
00:13:52,685 --> 00:13:54,525
If you want any help,
I could give you tips.
263
00:13:55,205 --> 00:13:56,630
He's had a girlfriend for about a minute
264
00:13:56,631 --> 00:13:59,165
and he thinks he's Bryan fucking Ferry.
265
00:13:59,805 --> 00:14:02,285
And why do people think
I need tips with women?
266
00:14:02,365 --> 00:14:03,365
Tips on style.
267
00:14:03,445 --> 00:14:04,605
Tips on style?
268
00:14:04,685 --> 00:14:05,685
From you?
269
00:14:05,765 --> 00:14:06,965
- Yeah.
- Go on.
270
00:14:07,285 --> 00:14:09,781
- Okay. Lunch or dinner?
- What difference does that make?
271
00:14:09,805 --> 00:14:12,205
Well, for dinner, she
might wear a ball gown,
272
00:14:12,285 --> 00:14:14,565
in which case you'll
wanna wear a dress suit.
273
00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:17,101
But for lunch, you'll probably
get away with blazer and slacks?
274
00:14:17,125 --> 00:14:19,565
- Slacks?
- Are you from the 1940s?
275
00:14:19,645 --> 00:14:21,245
- No need to wear a suit.
- I won't.
276
00:14:21,325 --> 00:14:23,845
- Smart jeans, nice shirt.
- Exactly, yeah.
277
00:14:23,925 --> 00:14:25,645
Have you got smart
jeans and a nice shirt?
278
00:14:27,925 --> 00:14:29,405
- Err...
- Hm.
279
00:14:29,485 --> 00:14:31,405
I'll take you shopping, if you like.
280
00:14:31,485 --> 00:14:33,085
But remember, black is slimming.
281
00:14:33,685 --> 00:14:35,445
Can't work miracles though, can it?
282
00:14:35,525 --> 00:14:37,125
Cheers, thank you.
283
00:14:38,005 --> 00:14:39,565
I don't need to go shopping.
284
00:14:39,645 --> 00:14:40,765
- Come on.
- Really?
285
00:14:40,845 --> 00:14:43,325
- Yeah.
- Ah. It's embarrassing.
286
00:14:43,405 --> 00:14:44,445
No, it's not.
287
00:14:44,525 --> 00:14:47,765
It is. A grown man
being told what to wear.
288
00:14:49,205 --> 00:14:51,485
Go in here.
289
00:14:51,565 --> 00:14:53,805
Fuck off.
290
00:14:57,685 --> 00:15:00,085
- Do you take requests?
- What?
291
00:15:00,965 --> 00:15:02,325
Have you got any Bee Gees?
292
00:15:05,485 --> 00:15:08,125
- What do you mean?
- Oh, sorry, I thought this was a disco.
293
00:15:08,605 --> 00:15:09,685
He's very old.
294
00:15:10,525 --> 00:15:11,805
Are you two together?
295
00:15:12,765 --> 00:15:14,405
- No.
- No, I was gonna say...
296
00:15:18,805 --> 00:15:20,925
Got one of these in 42 chest?
297
00:15:27,485 --> 00:15:28,845
- Be nice.
- Yeah.
298
00:15:34,165 --> 00:15:36,645
It's not a waste of
time, you working here.
299
00:15:37,205 --> 00:15:39,965
It is a good stepping stone,
and you can go on and do...
300
00:15:40,445 --> 00:15:42,205
anything you want. I didn't...
301
00:15:43,285 --> 00:15:44,285
'cause I didn't want to.
302
00:15:44,365 --> 00:15:45,725
I didn't do overtime,
303
00:15:46,405 --> 00:15:47,765
try and get promoted, or...
304
00:15:48,445 --> 00:15:50,845
get a better job in a
different town. I just...
305
00:15:51,565 --> 00:15:54,325
I just wanted to get home every night...
306
00:15:55,725 --> 00:15:58,765
spend every available
minute I could with Lisa.
307
00:16:01,325 --> 00:16:02,845
And I made the right decision.
308
00:16:04,725 --> 00:16:05,765
That's so lovely.
309
00:16:05,845 --> 00:16:07,765
Don't cry. Not in front
of your new boyfriend.
310
00:16:07,845 --> 00:16:09,245
Here he comes.
311
00:16:09,565 --> 00:16:10,565
Hi.
312
00:16:10,805 --> 00:16:12,765
It just won't look as good in this size.
313
00:16:17,325 --> 00:16:20,485
I could see the look of
disappointment when I went in his shop.
314
00:16:20,565 --> 00:16:21,741
- Hello.
- You all right?
315
00:16:21,765 --> 00:16:22,765
Yeah.
316
00:16:23,805 --> 00:16:26,645
This is Sandy, who works for me.
317
00:16:26,725 --> 00:16:27,885
- Hello, Sandy.
- Hello.
318
00:16:27,965 --> 00:16:29,605
- This is...
- Nice to meet you.
319
00:16:29,685 --> 00:16:30,685
... Daphne,
320
00:16:31,365 --> 00:16:33,805
who's a cleaner, my cleaner.
321
00:16:35,845 --> 00:16:36,845
Yeah.
322
00:16:37,285 --> 00:16:38,285
I'm his cleaner.
323
00:16:38,685 --> 00:16:40,607
Err... Not his friend or anything
324
00:16:40,608 --> 00:16:42,645
with a job he's embarrassed
about on my behalf.
325
00:16:42,965 --> 00:16:43,965
Anyway,
326
00:16:44,005 --> 00:16:46,565
I was just on my way to your
house to do some cleaning,
327
00:16:46,645 --> 00:16:49,605
and I forgot my keys, so it's
lucky we ran into each other.
328
00:16:49,685 --> 00:16:52,765
But he's just gonna give me
his 'cause I'm his cleaner.
329
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,525
- It's not a problem, is it?
- No.
330
00:16:54,605 --> 00:16:56,805
Trust your cleaner. Give
your keys to your cleaner.
331
00:16:57,205 --> 00:16:59,125
It's not like giving them
to a prostitute, is it?
332
00:17:00,205 --> 00:17:01,645
- See you later!
- Hope so.
333
00:17:08,885 --> 00:17:09,885
You all right, George?
334
00:17:20,525 --> 00:17:21,765
You left the keys in the door.
335
00:17:22,285 --> 00:17:23,685
- Did I?
- Yeah.
336
00:17:26,565 --> 00:17:27,565
That's amazing.
337
00:17:29,045 --> 00:17:30,445
Can't believe you've done all this.
338
00:17:30,485 --> 00:17:32,165
I can't believe you gave me your keys.
339
00:17:32,245 --> 00:17:33,605
I didn't wanna back down.
340
00:17:33,685 --> 00:17:34,845
I know.
341
00:17:36,845 --> 00:17:37,965
How much do I owe you?
342
00:17:38,685 --> 00:17:39,685
Nothing.
343
00:17:39,925 --> 00:17:41,885
Just wanted to see if you trusted me.
344
00:17:42,325 --> 00:17:43,725
Sorry about the whole...
345
00:17:43,805 --> 00:17:44,885
saying you're my cleaner.
346
00:17:44,965 --> 00:17:46,845
I thought you'd prefer it to prostitute.
347
00:17:46,925 --> 00:17:47,925
Sex worker.
348
00:17:48,005 --> 00:17:50,285
And only 'cause people
prejudge you when you say that,
349
00:17:50,365 --> 00:17:51,521
and I don't wanna scare the new girl.
350
00:17:51,522 --> 00:17:53,400
"This is my friend, she's a prostitute."
351
00:17:53,525 --> 00:17:55,005
- Sex worker.
- Right.
352
00:17:55,885 --> 00:17:56,885
No worries.
353
00:17:57,925 --> 00:17:58,925
D'you want a coffee?
354
00:17:59,005 --> 00:18:00,205
No, I've just had one.
355
00:18:00,645 --> 00:18:02,485
Actually, I've got to be going.
356
00:18:04,165 --> 00:18:06,165
You sure I can't give
you anything for this?
357
00:18:06,245 --> 00:18:08,005
No, it's my pleasure.
358
00:18:08,845 --> 00:18:10,525
Not everyone is out to get you, Tony.
359
00:18:10,965 --> 00:18:13,805
Most people are all right.
They're just having a bad day.
360
00:18:14,645 --> 00:18:16,711
Sometimes they don't
think, they get caught up.
361
00:18:16,712 --> 00:18:17,765
They're just trying to survive.
362
00:18:18,605 --> 00:18:21,765
Bad things happen to good people,
good things happen to bad people,
363
00:18:21,845 --> 00:18:22,885
and sometimes...
364
00:18:23,805 --> 00:18:25,005
it's just no one's fault.
365
00:18:27,325 --> 00:18:28,325
Cheers.
366
00:18:29,445 --> 00:18:31,485
Right, shoes on. See you later, mate.
367
00:18:32,205 --> 00:18:33,245
See you later.
368
00:18:34,525 --> 00:18:36,845
Good girl.
369
00:18:47,445 --> 00:18:48,445
Uh-uh-uh.
370
00:18:55,125 --> 00:18:56,125
Good.
371
00:18:57,125 --> 00:18:58,965
I should say from the off,
372
00:19:00,125 --> 00:19:04,005
I didn't want to do this, but
Matt said you're a widow, too, and,
373
00:19:04,085 --> 00:19:06,525
you know, absolutely
nothing, apart from eating,
374
00:19:07,285 --> 00:19:08,285
could ever come of this
375
00:19:08,325 --> 00:19:10,765
because I'm still attached to my wife,
376
00:19:10,845 --> 00:19:13,165
and... I'm just being honest.
377
00:19:13,565 --> 00:19:15,885
Is this your way of saying
we're gonna split the bill?
378
00:19:15,965 --> 00:19:17,165
Erm, champagne.
379
00:19:17,245 --> 00:19:20,165
Definitely splitting the
bill. Whiskey, please.
380
00:19:20,245 --> 00:19:21,581
- Any particular sort?
- Large.
381
00:19:21,605 --> 00:19:22,885
Oh, discerning.
382
00:19:22,965 --> 00:19:25,405
You know what? It's a
mouthful of painkiller.
383
00:19:25,485 --> 00:19:28,045
This is good schtick.
You know, dark and down.
384
00:19:28,125 --> 00:19:31,165
But you're obviously not really
suicidal. It's just bullshit.
385
00:19:32,005 --> 00:19:33,325
Right, that's where you're wrong.
386
00:19:33,405 --> 00:19:36,205
No, I know the story.
But seriously though,
387
00:19:36,285 --> 00:19:38,285
how hard is suicide?
388
00:19:38,725 --> 00:19:39,925
My husband did it.
389
00:19:40,725 --> 00:19:43,245
Threw himself off Beachy
Head, hit the rocks,
390
00:19:43,325 --> 00:19:46,765
skull exploded. Poof! Efficient.
391
00:19:47,165 --> 00:19:49,725
He was shit at everything else,
but gotta give him his due.
392
00:19:49,805 --> 00:19:52,325
He really knew what he was
doing when it came to suicide.
393
00:19:52,925 --> 00:19:54,445
- Wow.
- Wow indeed.
394
00:19:54,525 --> 00:19:57,005
And no, I'm not grieving. He was a cunt.
395
00:19:57,085 --> 00:19:59,805
Well, I'm sure you
gave as good as you got.
396
00:19:59,885 --> 00:20:01,605
- Oh, I did.
- Oh, I believe you.
397
00:20:02,325 --> 00:20:04,365
Why are you so sarcastic all the time?
398
00:20:05,365 --> 00:20:08,165
'Cause it stops me killing
people, including myself.
399
00:20:09,045 --> 00:20:12,445
- Gotta do what you've gotta do.
- You have, indeed... and...
400
00:20:13,525 --> 00:20:15,645
I... nearly took some pills.
401
00:20:15,725 --> 00:20:18,405
You nearly took some
pills? Jesus Christ.
402
00:20:18,485 --> 00:20:20,541
- What is wrong with you?
- No, what is wrong with you?
403
00:20:20,565 --> 00:20:22,005
Why couldn't you go through with it?
404
00:20:22,045 --> 00:20:24,605
Because I had to look after my dog.
405
00:20:24,685 --> 00:20:26,861
- That's an excuse.
- It's not an excuse. It's a reason.
406
00:20:26,885 --> 00:20:29,125
Because I realized that my wife
407
00:20:29,205 --> 00:20:31,765
was probably the only human
being I actually liked,
408
00:20:31,766 --> 00:20:33,725
and my dog is second.
409
00:20:33,805 --> 00:20:35,285
Well, maybe I could come third.
410
00:20:35,365 --> 00:20:36,445
Yeah, good luck.
411
00:20:36,845 --> 00:20:38,365
No, but I do get it.
412
00:20:38,445 --> 00:20:39,887
Some people just feel more comfortable
413
00:20:39,888 --> 00:20:41,885
around animals than
they do around people.
414
00:20:41,965 --> 00:20:45,445
I'm comfortable around humans.
I just think animals are better.
415
00:20:45,525 --> 00:20:46,925
That's because you're hurt
416
00:20:47,005 --> 00:20:50,045
and you've lost someone and
you think no one compares. Mmm.
417
00:20:50,125 --> 00:20:51,325
No one does compare.
418
00:20:51,925 --> 00:20:53,885
- No offense.
- No, none taken.
419
00:20:54,165 --> 00:20:56,765
And the reason animals
are better than people
420
00:20:56,845 --> 00:20:58,885
is because they just get on with it.
421
00:20:58,965 --> 00:21:01,245
- They don't whinge all the time...
- Unlike you.
422
00:21:01,325 --> 00:21:02,325
What d'you mean?
423
00:21:02,325 --> 00:21:05,245
We haven't stopped whinging
since we got here. No offense.
424
00:21:07,365 --> 00:21:08,605
- Well, this is nice.
- Mmm.
425
00:21:09,885 --> 00:21:11,845
- Cheers, thanks.
- Cheers.
426
00:21:11,925 --> 00:21:14,605
- Can I tell you about the specials?
- No.
427
00:21:17,405 --> 00:21:18,405
Fuckin' hell.
428
00:21:32,125 --> 00:21:33,125
Good.
429
00:21:34,445 --> 00:21:36,101
- Fuckin' let go!
- Fuck off!
430
00:21:41,525 --> 00:21:42,525
Cunt!
431
00:21:52,045 --> 00:21:53,805
- Well, that was really silly.
- Why?
432
00:21:54,245 --> 00:21:56,741
Well, they could have had some
acid or stabbed you or something.
433
00:21:56,765 --> 00:21:57,765
Told you...
434
00:21:58,165 --> 00:21:59,885
- I don't care.
- What if they'd stabbed me?
435
00:22:00,965 --> 00:22:02,485
- Oh, cheers.
- Pleasure.
436
00:22:17,805 --> 00:22:18,805
Me again.
437
00:22:18,965 --> 00:22:20,485
This must be why they call it a habit.
438
00:22:21,045 --> 00:22:22,365
- Yep.
- Yep.
439
00:22:26,005 --> 00:22:27,885
You know I know how you feel?
440
00:22:28,725 --> 00:22:30,565
Okay, try imagining if...
441
00:22:31,525 --> 00:22:33,965
everyone you told about
your wife dying just...
442
00:22:35,165 --> 00:22:36,725
thought it was their own fault.
443
00:22:38,325 --> 00:22:39,325
What d'you mean?
444
00:22:41,325 --> 00:22:43,165
Well, Mel was an addict, wasn't she?
445
00:22:43,685 --> 00:22:45,125
She injected herself, so...
446
00:22:45,965 --> 00:22:47,925
you know, most people just
think it was her fault.
447
00:22:49,245 --> 00:22:51,485
Don't feel the same sympathy
448
00:22:51,565 --> 00:22:53,365
for me or for her. I mean...
449
00:22:53,925 --> 00:22:57,045
Every minute of every day
that I have my wits about me,
450
00:22:57,125 --> 00:22:58,485
all I can think about is...
451
00:22:58,845 --> 00:23:01,725
getting some gear before I
become too fucking conscious.
452
00:23:04,485 --> 00:23:05,485
When I was with...
453
00:23:06,365 --> 00:23:07,365
Lisa,
454
00:23:08,205 --> 00:23:10,605
we'd sort of get home,
open a bottle of wine...
455
00:23:11,285 --> 00:23:13,645
and go, "Yay! Just us. Let's party."
456
00:23:14,565 --> 00:23:15,605
And by "party,"
457
00:23:16,165 --> 00:23:19,405
I mean... sit here
like this, with the dog,
458
00:23:20,325 --> 00:23:23,405
watching telly, or listening
to music, or just talking.
459
00:23:23,685 --> 00:23:25,405
Just, the more we talked,
460
00:23:26,605 --> 00:23:27,605
the more we drank.
461
00:23:28,805 --> 00:23:30,445
We didn't want the night to end.
462
00:23:32,045 --> 00:23:33,045
Now I drink...
463
00:23:34,725 --> 00:23:36,285
'cause I want the night to end.
464
00:23:37,965 --> 00:23:40,685
It's like I'm already dead
inside, and yet I'm still...
465
00:23:41,365 --> 00:23:42,885
in the worst kind of pain.
466
00:23:45,125 --> 00:23:46,125
Well...
467
00:23:47,565 --> 00:23:48,845
as long as we're having fun.
468
00:23:51,005 --> 00:23:53,525
I still can't believe
we've got so much in common.
469
00:23:54,925 --> 00:23:56,885
We don't have anything in common.
470
00:23:56,965 --> 00:23:58,205
Why do you say that, though?
471
00:23:58,285 --> 00:24:00,365
Well... the big difference is...
472
00:24:02,045 --> 00:24:04,045
you haven't given up yet, have you?
473
00:24:05,165 --> 00:24:07,645
I mean, me, I would quite
happily die right now.
474
00:24:09,045 --> 00:24:10,165
If I had enough money,
475
00:24:11,365 --> 00:24:14,485
I would just take as many
drugs as I possibly could.
476
00:24:50,525 --> 00:24:51,685
Don't waste it on food.
477
00:26:11,085 --> 00:26:15,845
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -