Morning, Wratherheads.
We have a superfun Would You Wrather? today.
And it's all thanks to Gary's Exotic Pets.
As their slogan says:
"For all your exotic pet needs, go to Gary's.
Please.
I've failed at everything I've tried
and I really need this to work."
Thanks, Gare.
So today, we've each come up with a surprise choice,
and here they are:
Would you rather go to school dressed as a hip-hop leprechaun...
This is not a good look.
...or take a nice, relaxing worm shower?
I don't get it, I take a warm shower every day.
Aah! You said "worm" not "warm"!
In case you didn't catch that--
Cooper has an extreme fear of worms.
We said we would pick fun Would You Wrathers?
This is fun, for me.
-[mouse clicks] -Yes!
Hip-hop leprechaun wins with 98%.
Thank you, Wratherheads.
Okay, worm shower's out.
Which means...
[students chattering]
[hip-hop music playing on boom box]
[theme music playing]
♪ Would you rather lose your phone ♪
♪ Or give up pizza for a month? ♪
♪ Share your diary with the world ♪
♪ Or have to eat it for your lunch? ♪
♪ Sing out of tune to your friends ♪
♪ Or trip and fall into your crush? ♪
♪ Shave your head, paint it red ♪
♪ Or use your dog's toothbrush? ♪
♪ We need a little Q and A ♪
♪ Come on, Wratherheads, play along ♪
♪ Would you rather do this? ♪
♪ Or would you rather do that? ♪
♪ Would you rather do that? ♪
♪ Don't matter what we do ♪
♪ We're doing it with you ♪
♪ I'd rather do that ♪
♪ Ask the world Would you rather do this? ♪
♪ Would you rather do this? ♪
♪ Or would you rather just dance? ♪
♪ Don't matter what we do We're doing it with you ♪
♪ I'd rather do that ♪
Ask the world!
♪ Would you rather do that? ♪
Sorry for the snack bar food,
but I was just too tired to cook dinner tonight.
You could at least act a tiny bit disappointed.
Oh, yeah, miss your cooking, Mom.
Yep. Just not the same.
[mumbling incoherently]
Okay, those weren't even words.
Even the vegetables are deep-fried.
This place gets it.
-Ow! -[Charlotte] You okay?
Ollie's been sleeping in my bed.
All of a sudden, he's afraid of the dark.
Turns out, he's a sleep kicker, and pincher,
and biter-- it's been fun.
I'm gonna go get more wings. These things...
are equally as good as that brown thing you make.
At least call it by its name:
brown-loaf.
You're a mess, let's get you cleaned up.
You're probably wondering why I'm extra smiley today.
You're probably all, "Hey, what's up with Charlotte?"
Sure, let's go with that.
Caleb, that cute tuba player, is coming over tomorrow
to continue the chess match we started yesterday.
We brushed knuckles when I attacked his rook.
My word, in public?
Hey, what's up, Fred?
Cooper! What are you doing here?!
Just grabbing dinner.
I thought you were hanging out with your grandpa again.
-How's it going? -Oh, you know Grandpa.
No, I've never met him.
Hey, Fred, I'll grab us some fries.
That gaming session was intense!
Cooper, Grandpa. Grandpa, Cooper.
Not sure what's happening here,
but I'm Mason.
He gets confused.
We'll get you home soon, Pop-Pop!
Fred, what's going on?
Fine.
Don't wander off! I'll be right back!
Okay. He's a kid from another school who I met at the rink.
So what's with all the sneaking around?
I didn't want Mason to meet you.
You're too likable. I was worried he'd ditch me to be friends with you.
But I'd never steal someone's friend.
Kindergarten. May 14th.
I was best buds with Kyle Trout
until he introduced us in the sandbox.
You offered me your pail.
Kyle never stood a chance.
Fred, you don't give yourself enough credit.
Mason's not gonna jump friends.
You're a cool dude.
Kyle Trout was a cool dude.
You have nothing to worry about.
Maybe I am being a little dramatic.
I guess we could all hang out tomorrow.
Just stop being so likable.
Don't worry, I can turn it off.
Oh, here, let me get that for you.
Helping an old lady? You're a monster!
Morning, Cami, Charlotte,
Tuba... person.
Mom, you know very well his name is Caleb.
It's okay, I've been told I have a very forgettable face.
I'm so sorry, Caleb.
I got zero sleep last night.
Ollie's still afraid to sleep alone?
Yep. Poor little guy is suffering so much.
What up, fam?! I know I am!
Okay, that's it. We're getting you over this "afraid of the dark" thing right now.
Sure, right after I hit the showers.
The two of us are going into this pitch-black pantry together,
so you can see there's nothing to be afraid of.
-[Ollie screaming] -[loud clattering]
Okay, I guess we're not ready for that.
So, that's my family.
They seem...
So it's still your move.
You're quite good at this.
Your face gives nothing away.
Oh, uh,
I can go for long periods of time without blinking.
My mom took me to a doctor,
but turns out I'm fine.
You are so fascinating.
We just heard the same story, right?
I, uh, actually need to get going.
Where can I throw this out?
The blue recycling bin.
Okay, um...
see ya soon.
Uh... [chuckles]
Caleb, I said the blue recycling bin.
I actually never recycle.
Trash is...
simply trash, am I right? [clicks tongue]
-[door closes] -[sighs] Did he just...
I can't be with someone who doesn't sort his garbage.
It was only one bottle.
Sorry, Cami, I couldn't hear you
because the planet was gagging.
That was an awesome day, you guys.
All thanks to Fred.
He planned the whole thing, Melvin.
It's actually Mason.
Sure, whatever.
So anyway, this is the room
where Coop and I do our Would You Wrather? show.
Your Would You what?
It's a streaming show where Coop and his sister assist me
in doing would you rathers.
We have fun with it.
Sounds like I'll have to catch a show sometime.
Well, we've got a big one tomorrow at three.
I'll check it out.
Aah, shoot, I gotta go.
Nice hanging with you today, Cooper.
Yeah, you too, Mordecai.
-It's Mason. -Whatever.
Hey. Thanks for not being a friend-stealer.
You weren't cool, you weren't funny,
and you smelled really bad.
That wasn't part of the plan.
Anyway, I appreciate it.
Later, bud.
Hey. Sorry, almost forgot.
I just got the new Zombie Guts 4.
You wanna play sometime?
You said on your show it's your favorite video game ever.
I thought you never saw our show.
You and I should totally hang out tomorrow.
What about Fred?
He's way better to hang with.
Because I smell, see?
You are too funny.
Anyways, I'll hit you up.
I can already tell we're gonna be best buds.
"Mordecai" out!
Can you believe Caleb doesn't recycle?
I never knew I was dating such a...
law-breaking rebel.
Rebel?
He asked for an ice pack because he was getting "chess elbow."
I'd break up with him, but I don't want to hurt his feelings.
He has no facial expressions, how would you even know?
All right, I know I need to end it, but I just...
hate confrontation.
Excuse me. I need you to take back my veggie burger.
I asked for no ketchup.
You could scrape the ketchup off with your fork.
I could do a lot of things with my fork.
But for now, I'm politely asking for a new burger.
Yes, ma'am.
That was awesome.
I wish I was that up front with people.
Well, you're going to have to be with Caleb.
Unless you want me to break up with him for you.
No!
Please, please, please, please...
Fine!
But only because I'll enjoy it.
[phone chiming]
Someone's blowing up your phone.
It's from the dry cleaners.
Now, that's the kind of customer support I can get behind.
Hey, sorry again about yesterday.
I can't believe I thought you were gonna friend-steal Mason.
-I know. That's-- -[phone chiming]
Wow! This guy really wants me to pick up my pants.
Mom? Is that my batting helmet?
You try sleeping with Kung-Fu Ollie.
Morning, all.
I trust everyone had a good night's rest.
That's it. Tonight, I'm tying your limbs to the bedpost.
I have a very small bladder.
You're playing a dangerous game, madam.
[whines]
I'm gonna take off.
Mom gets worried if she doesn't see me every few days.
Just be sure to be back in time to help set up
for our big Would You Wrather? this afternoon.
Already confirmed our special delivery.
See you later, bud.
Hey, bud!
-[gasps] -[door closes]
Mason. What are you doing?
You didn't answer my texts.
I got worried.
[sighs] Mason, the truth is,
I'm not into making new friends right now.
You should just hang out with Fred.
But you and I have so much in common.
Right-handed people in the house!
Okay. Fine, I'll go.
Could I just use your bathroom first?
Top of the stairs.
[doorbell rings]
Morning, I have a swan delivery:
one real, one ice.
What do you mean? This stuff's not supposed to be here till three.
The time got changed.
Fred!
Now I have to move up the Would You Wrather?
-This thing is gonna melt! -This sucker's heavy.
I hope you have some help.
-[door closes] -Did I hear you need some help?
Breaking up with someone is so unpleasant.
Do I have to be here?
He's your boyfriend.
-But you're dumping him for me. -You're staying.
What's with the pie?
Oh, I thought it'd be a nice parting gift.
Pecan, as in, "Maybe pecan still be friends."
Go sit over there and don't speak.
[phone ringing]
Hey, Cooper.
-Calm down. -Talk to him later.
You're helping me.
Okay, so, the swan's melting,
you're gonna have to improvise.
It is too a word.
Hey, Charlotte.
You, uh, wanted to talk?
I did. I... so did.
Don't tell me I didn't.
Is that a pie?
It is a pie.
As in, "Pie don't we do something fun this weekend?"
[weakly] She said whaaat?
You're just gonna have to do the show without me.
Okay, I'll improvise you later, too.
So, did you break up with him?
Yes. Sort of. No.
He asked me to go to the fair tomorrow
to ride The Slingshot of Terror. I said yes.
This is why I told you not to speak.
I wouldn't have had to if someone did what they promised.
Fine, just give me his number.
I can't do it by text.
I'm gonna need to do it myself now.
But you're gonna have to teach me how to be tough.
[phone rings]
What now, Cooper?
Yes, I'm positive it's a word.
Where's Fred?
I've sent him, like, 15 texts.
He's probably doing something important.
You know Fred.
I do know Fred.
And that's why I know he's doing nothing important.
Thanks for helping me move this stuff
but you can take off now.
You sure? I could help with your show.
That's okay. Ollie's got me covered.
Almost got them untangled, Coop!
-Come on, I'm good with a camera. -No way!
Fred would be super upset if he knew we were hanging out.
I guess you could just wait for him.
It's not like the ice statue is going anywhere.
Oh, yikes. It kinda is.
Ugh! Fine.
Just stay behind the camera.
And to be clear-- Fred's your friend.
Hey, Wratherheads.
Sorry for the change of plans,
but today's Would You Rather? is our coolest yet.
Yeah, it is!
Cami, your voice sounds weird!
You should probably not talk.
So here it is: Would you rather
sit on a swan made of ice
or have a real swan sit on you?
Vote now.
Looks like ice swan takes it.
I'm with the Wratherheads on this one!
Hell-o! Not a good day to wear shorts.
Ooh! Swan-sicle!
Ollie, don't!
And his lips are frozen to the swan.
Yet Ollie kissing a bird
is only the second-most disturbing thing I'm looking at!
Uh-oh! Gotta go!
You two having fun?!
Where were you?! I tried texting you!
I lost my phone, but I see you had no problem getting in touch with Mason.
Coop needed my help.
I hope I didn't do anything wrong.
Fred, I texted you and I can prove it.
Where'd they go?
My texts are gone!
Looks like you two are in a really bad place.
I should go.
I'm glad I could help out today.
I thought you were my friend.
-Fred, you need to listen to me-- -Don't!
Not in front of the boy.
[lisping] Lil' help, please!
[alarm chiming]
-[pigeon cooing] -Ah, there's a bird on my stomach.
[shrieking] There's a bird on my stomach!
Morning, sunshine.
Cami...
What? What?!
-Is there a problem? -[huffs] Cami,
you've so crossed the line!
If you wanted a war, you got one.
I'm coming for you.
There it is.
You wanted me to teach you how to be tough.
Class dismissed.
Wait, what?
I got to thinking, and...
you have no problem being strong and direct
when it comes to dealing with me.
That's how you need to be with Caleb.
Couldn't you have made this point
without carting my entire bedroom to the backyard?
Oh, absolutely.
Now, let's go! You've got a non-recycler to break up with.
Fine.
But first, get out of my room. I need to change.
Couch digging? I'm in!
I'm trying to find Fred's phone,
so I can prove I sent him those texts.
We won't find it here.
I saw it in that Mason kid's back pocket.
Mason? Are you sure?
Unless there are two leopard print phone cases
that say "Fredster" on them.
That kid is up to something.
I bet he's the one who changed the swan delivery time.
Yeah, and tangled me in cords!
Nope, that was all you, bud.
I gotta talk to the Wratherheads.
Hey, guys. This kid's been messing with me,
and now my best friend thinks I lied to him.
I need some ideas on how to prove I'm his real friend.
Interesting.
Not bad.
Absolutely not, PsychoTed.
Coop, it happened again.
Oh, yay, there's furniture in my backyard.
Ollie?
Who's there?!
I thought you said you couldn't fall asleep in the dark.
It's pretty dark with this on. Care to explain?
I'm good!
Sweetie, just be honest with me.
Whatever you say, I won't be mad.
Okay.
I faked my nightmares so I could crash with you
and not have to make my bed every day.
I'm sorry, what was that?
I don't like chores.
So, I figured I'd bunk with you.
Your bed, your mess.
You little demon!
You said you wouldn't get mad!
I lied!
From now on, until I say otherwise,
you will be making all five beds, starting with this one!
I lied again. Make this one later!
[man over loudspeaker] Now hold on tight for The Slingshot of Terror!
[screaming]
Well...
that looks fun.
-I have to go blow my nose. -Okay.
-So, I'm gonna go look for a tissue. -Sounds good.
Hmm...
So, you sure you wanna break up with him?
Because just listening to you two--
the chemistry, I mean, wow.
Cami, I don't think I can go through with this.
Yes, you can.
Direct and strong, like in the backyard.
Remember? You're a tough girl!
Where do you think I learned all my toughness from, Cooper?
[both laughing]
-Thanks. -You got this.
I had to use a napkin.
That's very rough paper to rub against my nose.
Is something wrong?
No! No, no. I don't know.
Did you recycle the napkin?
Nope, I just tossed it behind my back and--
Oh, I can't do this anymore!
-Excuse me? -I recycle, okay?
Oh, that felt so good to say.
I just pretended I didn't
because I wanted to give you a reason to break up with me.
You wanted me to break up with you?
Sorry, I hate conflict,
I didn't want to do it myself.
Are you kidding?
I was trying to break up with you, but I also hate conflict.
I wanna break up with both of you.
I guess we have more in common than I thought.
I guess we do.
Wait, why did you want to break up with me?
Your family scares me.
We do have a lot in common!
Maybe we should give it another shot.
Definitely.
And maybe we should also get off this insane ride.
I'm glad you said that.
Someone! Anyone?!
Here's 20 bucks, crank it up to mega speed.
[ride bell dings]
[screaming]
Fred, we need to talk.
Hold on to your friends, people,
Cooper Wrather just walked in.
Mason's not your friend.
He just wants to mess up our friendship.
You can't mess with something that's... not there.
I don't know what this guy's up to,
but he lied about not knowing the show.
Ollie saw him with your phone,
and I'm pretty sure he deleted all my texts to you.
Hey, fellas. You two patch things up?
No, we did not.
You know, I was thinking,
maybe you guys wouldn't fight as much if you spent less time together.
Maybe you should take time off the show. Relax a little.
Thank you, Mason, that's exactly what a friend would say.
I'm done playing games.
-Fellas, a lil' help! -What are you doing?
I'm facing my biggest fear to prove to you that I'm the real friend.
And real friends don't lie.
Time to take a worm shower.
What's the big deal? I take a warm shower every day.
[screams] You said "worm," not "warm"!
[sighs] I sure did.
Cooper, you're terrified of worms.
And that's why I'm doing it.
Three, two, one--
Wait!
You don't have to.
I believe you about Mason.
You do?
You, willing to take a worm shower?
You'd only do that for a friend.
A best friend.
You're making a big mistake, Coop!
I should be on the show.
I'm a way better Fred than Fred.
Check this out.
"We're streaming!"
Okay, so he's completely bonkers.
-What'd we do? -We leave immediately.
Wait! You guys!
I could be Ollie! "I want pie!"
[screaming]
He does scream like you.
I don't sound like that.
My phone!
A worm just touched me! [screaming]
-[doorbell rings] -I'll get it!
One large pepperoni.
Ooh, we actually ordered onion only.
So pretend the pepperonis are onions.
Is there a problem?
Nope. I got this.
Take this pizza back and bring us the right one,
or you won't have the satisfaction of knowing you did your job correctly.
Good first step.
Get it right or lose your thumbs.
Yes, ma'am!
Whee!