1 00:00:09,101 --> 00:00:11,982 [Maya] Oh, my God, Na, seventh grade! 2 00:00:12,065 --> 00:00:13,026 [Anna chuckles] I know. 3 00:00:13,569 --> 00:00:15,155 It's gonna be amazing. 4 00:00:15,614 --> 00:00:16,658 ♪ Give it to me ♪ 5 00:00:16,742 --> 00:00:18,411 ♪ I'm so addicted ♪ 6 00:00:18,494 --> 00:00:21,793 ♪ To the loving That you're feeding to me ♪ 7 00:00:21,877 --> 00:00:23,672 [Maya] Who else is in homeroom with us? 8 00:00:23,756 --> 00:00:25,801 -Like a Sam? -Oh, my God, he wishes. 9 00:00:25,885 --> 00:00:29,141 He wants you so bad, it's crazy. 10 00:00:29,224 --> 00:00:32,690 Ew, Na! Never in a trillion years, it's disgusting. 11 00:00:32,774 --> 00:00:35,070 -Like hell no! -[Anna] No. I know. 12 00:00:35,445 --> 00:00:37,407 Do you think Alex is still dating Heather? 13 00:00:37,491 --> 00:00:40,205 No, absolutely not. I heard that they broke up, 14 00:00:40,288 --> 00:00:43,629 because Heather gave a handjob to both Brandt J. and Dustin L. this summer. 15 00:00:43,712 --> 00:00:44,798 [Anna] Wait, what? 16 00:00:44,881 --> 00:00:46,593 -[Maya] Yeah. -That whole bag? 17 00:00:46,677 --> 00:00:48,179 [Maya] Such a slut. Oh, my God, also, 18 00:00:48,262 --> 00:00:51,645 I heard that Connie M. grew double D's her last night at camp. 19 00:00:51,728 --> 00:00:53,022 [Anna] That's so effed up. 20 00:00:53,147 --> 00:00:54,567 How is that even possible? 21 00:00:54,651 --> 00:00:57,364 [Maya] I don't know. It, like, happened in the middle of her sleep. 22 00:00:57,447 --> 00:00:59,201 [Anna] That's so unfair that that happens to people... 23 00:00:59,284 --> 00:01:00,453 -[Maya] I know. -[Anna] ...I wish that was me. 24 00:01:01,414 --> 00:01:03,292 -Na? -[Anna] Huh? 25 00:01:03,836 --> 00:01:06,925 I'm gonna ask you something, and I want you to tell me the truth. 26 00:01:07,008 --> 00:01:09,054 -Swear on your life. -Swear. 27 00:01:10,558 --> 00:01:13,479 Do I look exactly the same as last year? 28 00:01:13,564 --> 00:01:14,899 -[Anna] Oh, my God! -I won't be mad. Tell me. 29 00:01:14,983 --> 00:01:16,318 -Oh, my God, not at all. -[Maya] I won't be mad. 30 00:01:16,402 --> 00:01:18,072 -[Anna] Are you kidding me? -Really? 31 00:01:18,156 --> 00:01:19,283 [Anna] Promise. 32 00:01:19,366 --> 00:01:20,661 What are you going to wear tomorrow? 33 00:01:20,745 --> 00:01:23,625 I'm thinking, like, my blue shirt with, uh, the stripes. 34 00:01:23,709 --> 00:01:24,919 [Maya] Oh, my God! So cute. 35 00:01:25,003 --> 00:01:27,257 But, like, I'm also thinking of wearing a bra. 36 00:01:27,340 --> 00:01:29,261 Oh, my God. That's, like, really smart. 37 00:01:29,344 --> 00:01:30,598 You need it for your nipples. 38 00:01:32,058 --> 00:01:33,311 Yeah. 39 00:01:33,394 --> 00:01:34,689 I feel like we should make a pact. 40 00:01:34,773 --> 00:01:38,029 Duh! Let's like-- Let's, like, do everything together. 41 00:01:38,112 --> 00:01:41,202 Yeah, no doubt, like, all our first together like our first kiss. 42 00:01:41,285 --> 00:01:43,080 -Obviously. -Yeah, no doubt. 43 00:01:43,456 --> 00:01:44,626 Deal. 44 00:01:46,045 --> 00:01:50,011 Oh, my God! Seventh grade is gonna be so amazing. 45 00:01:50,094 --> 00:01:51,681 It's gonna be really, really good. 46 00:01:51,765 --> 00:01:54,269 This is gonna be like the best year of our lives. 47 00:01:54,353 --> 00:01:55,981 [keypad dialing, beeps] 48 00:01:56,065 --> 00:01:58,361 Shuji, get off AOL! 49 00:01:59,572 --> 00:02:01,408 Shuji! 50 00:02:01,492 --> 00:02:02,787 Maya? 51 00:02:03,705 --> 00:02:06,043 ♪ I... ♪ 52 00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:09,759 ♪ I am hiding ♪ 53 00:02:09,842 --> 00:02:15,563 ♪ The you I show to you is just a lie ♪ 54 00:02:16,272 --> 00:02:18,317 ♪ You take what you want ♪ 55 00:02:18,401 --> 00:02:20,029 ♪ You give what you take ♪ 56 00:02:20,113 --> 00:02:23,620 ♪ The high, high, high ♪ 57 00:02:48,795 --> 00:02:50,089 What's up! 58 00:02:51,968 --> 00:02:53,262 Yeah. 59 00:02:53,889 --> 00:02:56,728 I guess I did change a lot over the summer. 60 00:02:57,312 --> 00:02:59,609 Like, broke up with my camp boyfriend. 61 00:02:59,692 --> 00:03:02,405 Just like single now, so... 62 00:03:03,157 --> 00:03:05,913 Yeah. Line up. 63 00:03:11,131 --> 00:03:14,137 Do you like it? I changed it last night. 64 00:03:14,221 --> 00:03:16,016 No, it's stupid. 65 00:03:16,183 --> 00:03:18,939 No, it's not. It got layers. 66 00:03:22,269 --> 00:03:23,251 Mom! 67 00:03:24,074 --> 00:03:25,368 -[in English] What? -I'll fix it. 68 00:03:25,451 --> 00:03:26,495 Let me try fixing it. 69 00:03:26,579 --> 00:03:28,457 OK, fine. Just like a couple of layers. 70 00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:30,713 -OK, sit. -Just on the left side, though, OK? 71 00:03:30,796 --> 00:03:32,758 -Just like a little bit. -OK. OK. OK. 72 00:03:32,842 --> 00:03:34,261 It's not a lot. 73 00:03:34,344 --> 00:03:36,056 On the left side... 74 00:03:36,599 --> 00:03:38,227 What are you doing with that bowl? 75 00:03:38,310 --> 00:03:39,229 What now? 76 00:03:39,312 --> 00:03:40,899 -I'm going to make it better. -No, no, no. 77 00:03:40,983 --> 00:03:42,027 -I'm going to make it better. -Mom! 78 00:03:42,110 --> 00:03:43,905 -I'm going to make it better. -I'm not six anymore. 79 00:03:43,989 --> 00:03:45,116 Don't put it. 80 00:03:45,199 --> 00:03:49,041 -[speaking Japanese] -[Maya in English] OK, but... 81 00:03:49,834 --> 00:03:53,132 OK, but not really short. OK? Not like you've done before. 82 00:03:53,215 --> 00:03:55,428 -[Yuki] Like a layer, OK? -[Maya] Like a layer? 83 00:03:55,512 --> 00:03:56,430 [Yuki speaking Japanese] 84 00:03:56,514 --> 00:03:58,100 [in English] OK, with not, like, a bowl. 85 00:03:58,184 --> 00:03:59,854 What the fuck did you do? 86 00:03:59,937 --> 00:04:02,192 Shut up, Shuji! 87 00:04:13,214 --> 00:04:15,093 -Hi, Maya. -Hi. 88 00:04:15,176 --> 00:04:17,848 You ready for your first day in a new school, sweetie? 89 00:04:17,932 --> 00:04:20,269 -Yes, thanks. -First year, Mom. 90 00:04:21,898 --> 00:04:25,614 -Oh, my God! -I know. 91 00:04:25,697 --> 00:04:27,993 -How did you not tell me? You hair. -I hate it. I hate it. 92 00:04:28,077 --> 00:04:29,789 -Why? It looks so good. -No, it doesn't. 93 00:04:29,872 --> 00:04:31,751 -Are you serious? -Does it? You swear? 94 00:04:31,835 --> 00:04:32,795 Swear. 95 00:04:33,087 --> 00:04:36,009 -Swear on my life? -Swear on your freaking life. 96 00:04:36,093 --> 00:04:39,767 OK, I was going for Sarah Michelle Geller, but then, like, I ended up with this. 97 00:04:40,686 --> 00:04:41,938 That's who I was gonna say. 98 00:04:42,105 --> 00:04:44,192 But short? -Yeah, how do l look, though? 99 00:04:44,276 --> 00:04:45,779 -You look so good. -No, I don't. 100 00:04:45,863 --> 00:04:47,240 Yes, you do, like, so good. 101 00:04:47,323 --> 00:04:49,452 This is just like-- doesn't fit me right. 102 00:04:49,620 --> 00:04:51,373 No. It looks amazing. 103 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,296 [cackling] 104 00:04:55,591 --> 00:04:56,926 Oh, my God! You got spit on. 105 00:04:57,010 --> 00:04:58,387 Move your bag, dummy. 106 00:04:58,470 --> 00:04:59,724 Don't call me that. 107 00:05:00,183 --> 00:05:01,895 Maya, move your bag. 108 00:05:04,191 --> 00:05:05,903 -Are we picking up Sam next? -[Anna] Yeah. 109 00:05:14,712 --> 00:05:16,006 -Hi, Mrs. Kone. -Hello! 110 00:05:18,010 --> 00:05:19,722 Hi, guys. 111 00:05:20,807 --> 00:05:23,605 Maya, what the fuck did you do to your hair? 112 00:05:24,189 --> 00:05:26,903 -Na, you said it looked good. -It does look good. I don't know why... 113 00:05:26,986 --> 00:05:28,573 It looks like shit, Maya. 114 00:05:28,657 --> 00:05:30,451 Suck my balls, Sam. 115 00:05:30,535 --> 00:05:31,746 Suck these balls. 116 00:05:31,829 --> 00:05:33,708 -Ew! -That's nasty, Sam. 117 00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:35,754 [Maya] God! 118 00:05:37,048 --> 00:05:38,133 Hey, Shuji. 119 00:05:40,931 --> 00:05:42,518 Happy Eighth grade. 120 00:05:45,022 --> 00:05:47,193 -Mom! -[Maya] Yeah, this is good. 121 00:05:47,653 --> 00:05:50,742 [Maya, Anna] Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 122 00:05:50,826 --> 00:05:52,286 -[Anna] Maya, be cool. -[Maya] I am. 123 00:05:52,370 --> 00:05:53,288 -[Anna] Bye, Mom. -[Kathy] Go. 124 00:05:53,372 --> 00:05:54,959 [Maya] Thank you, Kathy. 125 00:05:55,042 --> 00:05:56,378 -Oh, my God. Maya? Maya? -What? What? 126 00:05:56,461 --> 00:05:58,717 We have to do it at the exact same time. 127 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:01,054 -Oh, yeah. -First steps in the middle school. 128 00:06:03,183 --> 00:06:05,021 OK, ready? Wait. 129 00:06:05,479 --> 00:06:08,611 [both] One, two, three. 130 00:06:10,448 --> 00:06:11,951 ["My Own Worst Enemy" by Lit] 131 00:06:13,495 --> 00:06:17,921 ♪ Can we forget about the things I said When I was drunk ♪ 132 00:06:18,882 --> 00:06:21,303 ♪ I didn't mean to call you that ♪ 133 00:06:22,931 --> 00:06:27,315 ♪ I can't remember what was said And what you threw at me ♪ 134 00:06:27,482 --> 00:06:29,820 ♪ Please tell me ♪ 135 00:06:29,904 --> 00:06:34,747 ♪ Please tell me why ♪ 136 00:06:34,830 --> 00:06:35,999 ♪ The car is in ♪ 137 00:06:36,208 --> 00:06:37,251 [boy] Watch out. 138 00:06:37,460 --> 00:06:38,797 [speaking indistinctly] 139 00:06:40,174 --> 00:06:41,677 Oh, my God! 140 00:06:41,761 --> 00:06:44,390 Connie M. is totally best friends with Heather now. 141 00:06:44,474 --> 00:06:45,727 [Maya] Ooh. Oh, my God! 142 00:06:45,811 --> 00:06:48,148 It's fricking true. They're ginormous! 143 00:06:49,234 --> 00:06:51,488 ♪ Bounce, oh, girl Get loose with it ♪ 144 00:06:51,531 --> 00:06:53,408 ♪ Bounce, oh, girl Get loose with it ♪ 145 00:06:53,492 --> 00:06:54,995 ♪ Bounce, oh, girl Get loose with it ♪ 146 00:06:55,079 --> 00:06:56,958 ♪ Bounce, oh, girl Get loose with it ♪ 147 00:06:57,041 --> 00:06:58,335 ♪ Get loose with it ♪ 148 00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:01,133 ♪ Now get loose with it And get loose with it ♪ 149 00:07:01,216 --> 00:07:02,803 [school bell rings] 150 00:07:12,071 --> 00:07:13,908 -Jessica Abrams. -Here. 151 00:07:14,535 --> 00:07:16,914 -Anna Kone? -Present. 152 00:07:17,248 --> 00:07:19,837 -Uh, Brent Jackson? -President! 153 00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:20,881 [all chuckle] 154 00:07:20,964 --> 00:07:23,218 OK. Cool guy. 155 00:07:23,928 --> 00:07:26,893 -Uh, Maya Ishii-Peters. -Present. 156 00:07:27,477 --> 00:07:29,899 Ishii... Oishi... you making me hungry. 157 00:07:29,982 --> 00:07:31,694 That means food, right? 158 00:07:31,777 --> 00:07:35,075 Yeah. That's crazy. How do you know that? 159 00:07:35,159 --> 00:07:37,915 Spent a little time in Japan teaching English in my 20s... 160 00:07:40,169 --> 00:07:42,423 -Right. Rebecca Roth? -[Rebecca] Here. 161 00:07:42,508 --> 00:07:43,843 -Maya. -What? 162 00:07:44,302 --> 00:07:46,891 Um, is Alex looking at me? 163 00:07:47,141 --> 00:07:50,064 -[Mr. O] Robert Terry? -[Robert] Here. 164 00:07:50,147 --> 00:07:52,235 -[Mr. O] Julie Burger? -No. 165 00:07:52,485 --> 00:07:54,698 How about now? Hold on. 166 00:07:54,782 --> 00:07:55,700 [girl] Present. 167 00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:57,245 No. 168 00:07:57,621 --> 00:07:59,959 No, he's hitting Brandt in the balls. 169 00:08:00,585 --> 00:08:02,338 Hey. Don't. Get away from my balls. 170 00:08:02,421 --> 00:08:04,552 -[Mr. O] Brian Carter? -[Brian] Here. 171 00:08:04,635 --> 00:08:06,639 -He'll probably look at me later. -[Maya] Yeah. 172 00:08:06,722 --> 00:08:08,560 OK. Listen up, everyone. 173 00:08:08,643 --> 00:08:10,271 I have your locker assignments. 174 00:08:10,354 --> 00:08:12,943 -So you can just... take it outside. -[bell rings] 175 00:08:14,572 --> 00:08:15,782 [indistinct] 176 00:08:18,495 --> 00:08:20,207 -Oh, my God! -What are these? 177 00:08:20,291 --> 00:08:21,376 What are what? 178 00:08:21,459 --> 00:08:22,879 There's, like, all these signs. 179 00:08:23,506 --> 00:08:25,092 "Brandt loves Maya." 180 00:08:25,594 --> 00:08:27,388 [Anna] "Dustin loves Maya." 181 00:08:27,471 --> 00:08:28,891 It says down there, too. 182 00:08:29,602 --> 00:08:30,687 Oh, my God! They all say 183 00:08:30,770 --> 00:08:31,981 "Brandt loves Maya" and "Dustin loves Maya." 184 00:08:32,064 --> 00:08:33,358 Anna, what is happening? 185 00:08:34,695 --> 00:08:35,905 Oh, my God! 186 00:08:36,197 --> 00:08:38,493 I mean, is that like me? 187 00:08:38,578 --> 00:08:40,372 -Yeah, it's you. -Crazy. Wait. Wait. Wait. 188 00:08:40,456 --> 00:08:43,086 They're literally the hottest guys in the school. 189 00:08:43,170 --> 00:08:45,090 Maya, it's happening. 190 00:08:45,174 --> 00:08:46,844 Hey, Maya, come over here. 191 00:08:46,927 --> 00:08:48,138 Yeah. Come over here. 192 00:08:48,472 --> 00:08:49,725 Oh, my God! 193 00:08:50,476 --> 00:08:52,648 -Come with me. Come with me. -I can't. 194 00:08:52,731 --> 00:08:53,858 -No, no, no. Come with me. -They didn't say me. 195 00:08:53,941 --> 00:08:54,943 -They only said you. -OK, all right. 196 00:08:55,027 --> 00:08:56,112 -OK. -You got it. 197 00:09:02,584 --> 00:09:03,753 What's up! 198 00:09:03,836 --> 00:09:05,339 You look so different. 199 00:09:06,801 --> 00:09:07,844 Thanks. Um... 200 00:09:08,638 --> 00:09:11,769 Yeah. I got a... I got a haircut last minute. 201 00:09:11,852 --> 00:09:12,938 Oh, where did you get it? 202 00:09:13,564 --> 00:09:14,900 Where did I get it? 203 00:09:16,361 --> 00:09:20,787 -At the salon, that was, like, called... -Superb. 204 00:09:20,870 --> 00:09:22,289 Salon Superb. 205 00:09:22,456 --> 00:09:24,001 Hmm. Never heard of that one. 206 00:09:24,085 --> 00:09:25,254 Becca! 207 00:09:25,337 --> 00:09:27,007 But whatever you did, it worked. 208 00:09:27,091 --> 00:09:30,055 Because Brandt and Dustin obviously think you're, like, so fine this year. 209 00:09:30,139 --> 00:09:31,976 No, they don't. You guys-- 210 00:09:32,143 --> 00:09:34,147 -They're totally into you. -Everyone's talking about it. 211 00:09:34,230 --> 00:09:35,441 -They were staring at you. -Stop! 212 00:09:35,525 --> 00:09:37,946 Yeah, Brandt's so fine, and they both like you. 213 00:09:38,029 --> 00:09:39,950 -Isn't that amazing? -I know, like, what! 214 00:09:40,033 --> 00:09:42,413 -Crazy! -It's crazy, you guys, 215 00:09:42,496 --> 00:09:45,127 like, I'm losing my mind right now. 216 00:09:47,381 --> 00:09:49,093 [school bell rings] 217 00:09:51,264 --> 00:09:54,103 [Maya] They think I'm fine, and Heather likes my haircut. 218 00:09:54,187 --> 00:09:55,397 -[Anna] Brandt loves you... -Brandt loves Maya... 219 00:09:55,565 --> 00:09:56,984 -Dustin loves Maya. -Dustin loves you. 220 00:09:57,067 --> 00:09:59,155 Wait. Wait a second. Wait. 221 00:10:00,365 --> 00:10:01,744 Is there another Maya? 222 00:10:01,827 --> 00:10:02,871 [woman talking indistinct] 223 00:10:02,954 --> 00:10:04,165 -No. -No. 224 00:10:04,248 --> 00:10:06,085 No. I can't... I can't think of anyone. 225 00:10:06,169 --> 00:10:07,964 -Yeah. So it's me. -It's you. 226 00:10:08,048 --> 00:10:09,342 It's me. Oh, my God! 227 00:10:09,510 --> 00:10:10,595 Oh, my God! 228 00:10:10,678 --> 00:10:12,891 Hey! You two! 229 00:10:12,974 --> 00:10:14,728 You think you can talk over me? 230 00:10:15,270 --> 00:10:16,607 [both] No. 231 00:10:17,984 --> 00:10:19,195 Oh, thank you. 232 00:10:20,740 --> 00:10:22,201 I've got my eye on you two. 233 00:10:22,326 --> 00:10:23,579 [Maya sighs] 234 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:25,708 Oh, my God! 235 00:10:27,838 --> 00:10:29,925 [kids cheering] 236 00:10:30,593 --> 00:10:32,346 -[girl 1] Come, come on. -[girl 2] Get him, get him. 237 00:10:32,514 --> 00:10:35,854 Oh, my God. I'm so sorry, but, like, here comes Brandt. 238 00:10:35,937 --> 00:10:37,314 God, no! 239 00:10:38,776 --> 00:10:40,445 [boy] OK, just throw it. 240 00:10:42,576 --> 00:10:44,955 Stop! Stop. Stop! 241 00:10:47,961 --> 00:10:51,426 ♪ Lying in your arms ♪ 242 00:10:51,510 --> 00:10:53,723 ♪ So close together ♪ 243 00:10:53,806 --> 00:10:57,606 ♪ Didn't know just what I had ♪ 244 00:10:59,066 --> 00:11:01,655 But then again, there's Dustin. He's fly. 245 00:11:01,947 --> 00:11:04,285 ♪ Now I toss and turn ♪ 246 00:11:04,578 --> 00:11:05,580 ♪ Cause I... ♪ 247 00:11:05,788 --> 00:11:08,209 His earring is so hot. 248 00:11:08,293 --> 00:11:10,673 -Yeah, I know. -[Maya] He is so cute. 249 00:11:14,765 --> 00:11:17,938 And then there's... him. 250 00:11:18,021 --> 00:11:22,363 ♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪ 251 00:11:22,697 --> 00:11:27,498 ♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪ 252 00:11:27,749 --> 00:11:30,128 ♪ La, la, la, la, la ♪ 253 00:11:30,212 --> 00:11:35,222 ♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪ 254 00:11:35,305 --> 00:11:38,521 Earth to Blondie! Batter up! 255 00:11:38,604 --> 00:11:40,525 -Sorry. -Anna, that's you. Oh, my God, go. 256 00:11:43,488 --> 00:11:44,908 [Maya] Go, Na! 257 00:11:45,450 --> 00:11:47,121 You got this. 258 00:11:48,081 --> 00:11:49,710 Kick it, Na! 259 00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:51,337 Kick it. Kick it! 260 00:11:56,139 --> 00:11:57,976 -[coach whistles] -[Anna gasps] 261 00:11:58,435 --> 00:12:02,192 [Holivido] Man down. Everybody, sit down. 262 00:12:02,276 --> 00:12:05,908 Hey, you! Take your victim to the nurse. 263 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:12,630 I'm really, really, really, really sorry. 264 00:12:13,716 --> 00:12:14,968 It's chill. 265 00:12:16,555 --> 00:12:18,809 Um, it's crazy, though, 266 00:12:18,893 --> 00:12:21,899 because you don't even look bad with blood on your face. 267 00:12:24,821 --> 00:12:27,242 Um, do you know my friend Maya? 268 00:12:27,326 --> 00:12:28,537 Nah. 269 00:12:30,165 --> 00:12:33,379 Oh, my God, that... that's crazy. 270 00:12:33,463 --> 00:12:34,841 That's her nickname for me. 271 00:12:35,300 --> 00:12:36,302 Na. 272 00:12:36,427 --> 00:12:39,350 Um, she's my best friend. She's amazing, 273 00:12:39,433 --> 00:12:42,774 and actually two of your best friends are, like, in love with her. 274 00:12:44,235 --> 00:12:45,905 So it's like, how do you pick, you know, 275 00:12:45,988 --> 00:12:48,744 'cause, like, I've only ever been in love with one person. 276 00:12:53,963 --> 00:12:57,052 Brandt's nice, but you know, Dustin has an earring. 277 00:12:57,135 --> 00:12:58,639 Dustin's a bitch. 278 00:13:01,895 --> 00:13:04,526 -Dustin is a bitch? -[mumbles indistinctly] 279 00:13:07,991 --> 00:13:09,285 Dustin is a bitch. 280 00:13:09,368 --> 00:13:10,453 A bitch? 281 00:13:10,538 --> 00:13:12,499 -[Anna] That's what Alex said. -Oh, my God. 282 00:13:12,584 --> 00:13:14,504 Yeah, so I really think that you should just go with Brandt. 283 00:13:14,588 --> 00:13:16,592 I mean, obviously, whatever you wanna do. 284 00:13:16,675 --> 00:13:18,344 But do you really wanna do with the bitch 285 00:13:18,428 --> 00:13:19,639 that doesn't hang out with Alex? 286 00:13:20,223 --> 00:13:22,687 I don't know. Maybe being with a bitch is the best thing for me. 287 00:13:22,854 --> 00:13:25,400 Look, I like his earring. Shit. 288 00:13:26,068 --> 00:13:28,364 Can't believe they're not friends. They're not best friends? 289 00:13:28,448 --> 00:13:30,327 Yeah, I mean, obviously, not anymore. 290 00:13:30,410 --> 00:13:31,830 [Maya] That is crazy. 291 00:13:31,914 --> 00:13:34,878 OK. Well, then I don't wanna be with him. I don't. 292 00:13:34,961 --> 00:13:36,840 I only wanna be with someone who's best friends with Alex, 293 00:13:36,924 --> 00:13:39,136 'cause I wanna be in the same room with you for our first fingers. 294 00:13:39,219 --> 00:13:41,057 Like, I'm not gonna do without you. 295 00:13:41,140 --> 00:13:43,102 Seriously, like, I'm gonna go with Brandt. 296 00:13:43,186 --> 00:13:45,440 [Mrs. Bell] Quiet, please. Settle down. 297 00:13:45,858 --> 00:13:49,031 Young sir in the Care Bear sweatshirt. 298 00:13:49,114 --> 00:13:50,075 Huh? 299 00:13:50,158 --> 00:13:51,536 -She's a girl. -[all chuckle] 300 00:13:51,995 --> 00:13:53,081 Yeah, I'm a girl. 301 00:13:53,164 --> 00:13:56,212 Care to share something you did over the summer? 302 00:13:56,797 --> 00:13:58,424 Come up to the front. 303 00:14:06,876 --> 00:14:07,944 [Maya] Um... 304 00:14:07,944 --> 00:14:11,325 I guess, like, the most memorable thing I did over this summer 305 00:14:11,409 --> 00:14:14,666 was I watched Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, like, six times in a row. 306 00:14:15,083 --> 00:14:16,545 And it is, like, really funny. [chuckles] 307 00:14:17,462 --> 00:14:21,470 'Cause he does, like, all this like, rewind, like, fast forward stuff, like-- 308 00:14:22,097 --> 00:14:24,435 I'll just do it. It's like... 309 00:14:25,521 --> 00:14:27,817 "I really wanna play, Coach. Just give me a chance. 310 00:14:28,484 --> 00:14:30,614 Let's see that in instant slow-mo." 311 00:14:30,698 --> 00:14:33,704 [continues impersonating] 312 00:14:44,475 --> 00:14:46,187 [speaking gibberish] 313 00:14:50,863 --> 00:14:52,992 Really makes me laugh. 314 00:14:53,076 --> 00:14:55,539 And he does this other thing, where he's like... 315 00:14:56,541 --> 00:14:58,086 Ahhh! 316 00:15:04,933 --> 00:15:06,978 Sit down. 317 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:12,072 Enough of that. 318 00:15:12,155 --> 00:15:15,120 OK. Everyone, take out your summer reading, 319 00:15:15,286 --> 00:15:17,082 and get into groups of four. 320 00:15:17,165 --> 00:15:20,840 Uh, John, Lydia, Jafeer... 321 00:15:20,923 --> 00:15:24,429 OK, so, what do you think about this if I give that to Brandt? 322 00:15:24,556 --> 00:15:28,312 [Anna reading] 323 00:15:28,730 --> 00:15:30,818 Um, it could go like this. 324 00:15:33,824 --> 00:15:35,285 [Maya reading] 325 00:15:40,295 --> 00:15:41,631 [Anna] Look, I feel like it needs a question. 326 00:15:41,715 --> 00:15:43,009 [Maya] OK. Yeah, I know. You're right. 327 00:15:43,092 --> 00:15:45,388 And then put my name, 'cause he won't know who it is. 328 00:15:46,432 --> 00:15:47,434 Perfect. 329 00:15:50,649 --> 00:15:52,152 [Anna] So exciting. 330 00:15:55,450 --> 00:15:57,663 OK, Brandt. 331 00:16:02,005 --> 00:16:04,886 I'm gonna, like, have my first boyfriend. 332 00:16:05,053 --> 00:16:06,013 No doubt. 333 00:16:06,096 --> 00:16:07,725 That's freaking crazy. 334 00:16:07,808 --> 00:16:09,394 It's amazing, and we'll go on, like, double dates and stuff. 335 00:16:09,478 --> 00:16:10,648 I know, with, like, Alex. 336 00:16:10,731 --> 00:16:11,942 I mean, if he wants to. 337 00:16:12,359 --> 00:16:13,820 Dustin says yes. Dustin says yes. 338 00:16:13,904 --> 00:16:14,989 -Brandt says yes. -I do not say yes. 339 00:16:15,073 --> 00:16:15,991 -Yes, he does. -No, I do not. 340 00:16:16,075 --> 00:16:16,993 -[Brandt] Yes, he does. -[Dustin] No, I do not. 341 00:16:17,077 --> 00:16:18,622 Oh, my God, wait. 342 00:16:18,705 --> 00:16:20,500 Dustin, that is, like, so presumptuous to think 343 00:16:20,584 --> 00:16:22,045 that she's asking you. She asked him. 344 00:16:22,128 --> 00:16:23,590 You guys, stop. 345 00:16:23,674 --> 00:16:26,513 This is, like, so mean. Just tell her. 346 00:16:26,846 --> 00:16:28,809 [Dustin] U-G-I-S, biyatch! 347 00:16:28,892 --> 00:16:30,353 -UGIS. -UGIS. 348 00:16:30,436 --> 00:16:32,065 [both yelling] 349 00:16:32,482 --> 00:16:33,735 Wait, what? 350 00:16:33,902 --> 00:16:35,531 Oh, honey, don't you know? 351 00:16:35,614 --> 00:16:37,535 It means ugliest girl in school. 352 00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:44,006 [boy] UGIS! 353 00:16:44,131 --> 00:16:45,759 [Becca] They're so mean. 354 00:16:46,928 --> 00:16:48,640 And they said they don't know why you are wearing a bra, Anna, 355 00:16:49,224 --> 00:16:51,061 'cause there's nothing to go in it. 356 00:16:51,771 --> 00:16:53,609 I'm so sorry. 357 00:16:55,486 --> 00:16:58,535 It's cool, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, this is really funny. 358 00:16:59,787 --> 00:17:01,916 [boys] UGIS! UGIS! 359 00:17:02,208 --> 00:17:04,379 -Thanks for telling me, Becca. -[Becca] You're welcome. 360 00:17:04,463 --> 00:17:06,175 -OK. -Bye. 361 00:17:06,258 --> 00:17:07,595 Bye. 362 00:17:16,946 --> 00:17:19,535 It's not they like my haircut. 363 00:17:19,786 --> 00:17:21,246 They're assholes. 364 00:17:21,497 --> 00:17:23,209 [Maya] No. They were right. 365 00:17:24,086 --> 00:17:28,344 -I am ugly. I'm a freaking freak. -No, you're not. 366 00:17:28,845 --> 00:17:31,058 Like... [sniffles] 367 00:17:31,225 --> 00:17:32,645 I'm UGIS. 368 00:17:33,396 --> 00:17:37,822 Maya, if UGIS means beautiful unicorn, 369 00:17:38,114 --> 00:17:41,830 then yeah, you--you you're UGIS. Then, yeah, you are. 370 00:17:41,913 --> 00:17:44,334 No. Na, do you understand, like, 371 00:17:44,418 --> 00:17:46,673 I'm the ugliest girl in school. 372 00:17:47,173 --> 00:17:49,679 You get that in your skull? 373 00:17:50,012 --> 00:17:52,518 Like, to love me is the biggest insult. 374 00:17:52,643 --> 00:17:54,981 Like, that's what it means. 375 00:17:55,440 --> 00:17:56,609 [Maya sobbing] 376 00:17:58,655 --> 00:18:02,495 Then I guess, you know, I've been insulted the greatest. 377 00:18:15,689 --> 00:18:17,233 ["Hanging by a Moment" by Lifehouse] 378 00:18:18,027 --> 00:18:21,450 ♪ I'm desperate for changing ♪ 379 00:18:21,785 --> 00:18:25,416 ♪ Starving for truth ♪ 380 00:18:25,500 --> 00:18:29,466 ♪ I'm closer to where I started ♪ 381 00:18:29,550 --> 00:18:32,263 ♪ Chasing after you ♪ 382 00:18:32,347 --> 00:18:36,355 ♪ I'm falling even more in love with you ♪ 383 00:18:36,438 --> 00:18:40,196 ♪ Letting go of all I've held onto ♪ 384 00:18:43,745 --> 00:18:47,670 You literally look, like, hot right now. 385 00:18:49,799 --> 00:18:51,678 You know, none of this actually makes any sense. 386 00:18:51,761 --> 00:18:52,763 I know. 387 00:18:52,847 --> 00:18:54,892 Like Terra Newback? It's a hunchback for Pete's sake. 388 00:18:54,976 --> 00:18:56,563 Yeah, I know. Or freaking Cindy Puchak like? 389 00:18:56,646 --> 00:18:58,023 Her mole covers her whole neck. 390 00:18:58,107 --> 00:19:00,152 It's the size of my face, like, it's bigger. 391 00:19:00,236 --> 00:19:01,906 And like, think about Beth Mahoney. 392 00:19:01,990 --> 00:19:04,537 Beth Mahoney is freaking busted like... 393 00:19:04,620 --> 00:19:06,708 -She's UGIS. -She's so UGIS. 394 00:19:06,791 --> 00:19:08,377 -Like I'm UGIS? -You're not UGIS. 395 00:19:08,460 --> 00:19:10,883 -Hey, UGIS. -Go fuck your mom. 396 00:19:11,593 --> 00:19:13,220 They're all a bunch of fuckers. 397 00:19:16,603 --> 00:19:18,272 We just have to do something about this. 398 00:19:18,355 --> 00:19:19,525 Anna, I can't. 399 00:19:22,322 --> 00:19:23,617 I have an idea. 400 00:19:24,785 --> 00:19:26,706 Do you know where the eighth graders sit? 401 00:19:28,919 --> 00:19:30,463 [rock music playing] 402 00:19:43,280 --> 00:19:44,825 You shouldn't be here. 403 00:19:45,451 --> 00:19:47,246 -Get out of here, freaks. -OK. 404 00:19:47,330 --> 00:19:48,457 -[Shuji] Fucking leave. -We should go. 405 00:19:48,541 --> 00:19:50,378 Shuji, no. It's important. Stop. 406 00:19:51,372 --> 00:19:52,381 [Anna] Um... 407 00:19:52,423 --> 00:19:54,762 They were these boys in our grade, 408 00:19:54,845 --> 00:19:57,308 who were not kind to... 409 00:19:57,392 --> 00:19:59,563 -I need you to beat them up, Shuji. -Yeah. 410 00:19:59,647 --> 00:20:01,526 [Maya] Like, it just needs to happen. 411 00:20:01,693 --> 00:20:02,945 Why should I? 412 00:20:03,780 --> 00:20:06,034 See. Like I told you he wouldn't care. 413 00:20:06,118 --> 00:20:08,497 This is literally, like, the worst day of my life, 414 00:20:08,581 --> 00:20:10,836 and he'll probably call me UGIS, too. 415 00:20:12,715 --> 00:20:14,342 Did you just say UGIS? 416 00:20:14,677 --> 00:20:16,096 Yeah. 417 00:20:21,774 --> 00:20:23,945 UGIS is the worst thing you can be called. 418 00:20:24,029 --> 00:20:27,035 The list of UGIS's past, they're all heinous dogs. 419 00:20:27,118 --> 00:20:28,120 There's a list? 420 00:20:28,872 --> 00:20:31,293 Look, I'm not gonna beat up a seventh grader, 421 00:20:31,376 --> 00:20:32,838 but I can teach you some words. 422 00:20:33,631 --> 00:20:35,176 Um, what do they look like? 423 00:20:35,342 --> 00:20:38,390 Um. Well, like, um... 424 00:20:39,685 --> 00:20:44,110 Brandt, he, like, has this, like, chestnut silky hair, 425 00:20:44,194 --> 00:20:46,364 and it's like, he has brown honeydew-- 426 00:20:46,448 --> 00:20:48,160 No, what are his bad features? 427 00:20:49,580 --> 00:20:50,999 Oh. 428 00:20:51,291 --> 00:20:52,210 [Anna] Um... 429 00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:55,884 -I think he's like... he's, like, short. -Mm-hmm. 430 00:20:55,967 --> 00:20:57,513 -That's true. -Yeah. That's good. 431 00:20:57,596 --> 00:20:58,973 -[Maya] Is that good? -Mm-hmm. 432 00:20:59,057 --> 00:21:00,936 -And like, Stacy Davis told me that... -Oh, yeah. 433 00:21:01,019 --> 00:21:02,731 ...she gave me a handy when his dad was sick 434 00:21:02,815 --> 00:21:04,150 to help make him feel better, 435 00:21:04,234 --> 00:21:06,446 and she said he's not circumcised, 436 00:21:06,531 --> 00:21:08,117 and it looks like an aardvark. 437 00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:09,494 That's what she said. 438 00:21:09,578 --> 00:21:11,541 OK, for sure, you're gonna wanna bring up the aardvark dick. 439 00:21:11,624 --> 00:21:13,795 -OK. -OK, this is what you're gonna say. 440 00:21:13,878 --> 00:21:16,843 Hey, you porcupine midget piece of shit, 441 00:21:16,926 --> 00:21:19,557 I would never touch that aardvark dick with a 10-foot pole, 442 00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:21,476 so suck it, bitch. 443 00:21:25,902 --> 00:21:27,029 You got it? 444 00:21:27,906 --> 00:21:30,077 Yeah. Yeah. 445 00:21:30,244 --> 00:21:31,747 -That was great. -OK. All right. 446 00:21:31,831 --> 00:21:33,417 -OK. -Don't-- 447 00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:34,712 Come on. 448 00:21:36,841 --> 00:21:38,845 [indistinct talking] 449 00:21:42,185 --> 00:21:43,478 [girl chuckles] 450 00:21:44,063 --> 00:21:46,234 You guys. You guys! 451 00:21:46,777 --> 00:21:50,075 After school, I'm gonna bitch out Brandt and Dustin. 452 00:21:50,535 --> 00:21:52,038 -[all exclaim] -Magic. 453 00:21:53,373 --> 00:21:55,712 She's gonna get her butt kicked. 454 00:22:02,099 --> 00:22:03,310 -You can do this. -Yeah. 455 00:22:03,477 --> 00:22:05,105 Like don't let anyone stop you from your dreams. 456 00:22:05,189 --> 00:22:06,441 Yeah. 457 00:22:15,877 --> 00:22:17,129 [mouthing] 458 00:22:22,014 --> 00:22:24,185 -What's up? -So what's up! 459 00:22:24,937 --> 00:22:26,356 -What's up? -What's up? 460 00:22:26,899 --> 00:22:29,028 -You midget! -What are you doing? 461 00:22:29,112 --> 00:22:30,447 [mouthing] 462 00:22:30,824 --> 00:22:32,869 -Midget! -OK. 463 00:22:33,579 --> 00:22:34,790 Midget. 464 00:22:34,999 --> 00:22:37,587 You midget. Aardvark. You got an aardvark? 465 00:22:37,671 --> 00:22:40,259 -You got an aardvark. -I... I have a dog. 466 00:22:40,802 --> 00:22:42,179 Has a dog. 467 00:22:42,263 --> 00:22:44,267 -You're a piece of shit! -Yeah, you're a piece of shit! 468 00:22:44,350 --> 00:22:45,812 Oh, damn, you're gonna take that? 469 00:22:45,895 --> 00:22:47,607 Midget piece of shit. 470 00:22:47,691 --> 00:22:49,027 -[kids cheering] -Yeah, what? 471 00:22:50,947 --> 00:22:52,283 Come on. Come on, fight. 472 00:22:52,366 --> 00:22:54,538 Yeah! Yeah! You mi-- 473 00:22:54,621 --> 00:22:56,082 You midget piece of shit! Yeah! 474 00:22:56,207 --> 00:22:57,376 You gonna take that? 475 00:22:57,460 --> 00:22:58,880 -You better take that. -Yeah, take that. 476 00:22:58,963 --> 00:23:00,800 -You gonna take that? -What? 477 00:23:00,884 --> 00:23:02,596 -You're a midget piece of shit! -Yeah! 478 00:23:02,763 --> 00:23:06,186 And you got an aardvark dick, and that's why your dad died. 479 00:23:06,394 --> 00:23:12,198 -Oh! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Go! Go! -Yes! 480 00:23:12,281 --> 00:23:14,160 [Maya exclaiming] 481 00:23:18,586 --> 00:23:20,047 [Dustin] Hey, Brandt, are you OK? 482 00:23:22,009 --> 00:23:23,513 Can't believe you'd bring up his dad. 483 00:23:24,097 --> 00:23:25,850 What the fuck? Come on. 484 00:23:25,934 --> 00:23:28,105 You can't help it if Dustin's a bitch. 485 00:23:28,188 --> 00:23:29,232 Fuck you! 486 00:23:29,315 --> 00:23:30,902 -[car horn honks] -Oh, my God, my mom! 487 00:23:30,985 --> 00:23:33,031 -Go! Go! -Maya... 488 00:23:33,533 --> 00:23:35,035 It's OK. 489 00:23:41,381 --> 00:23:42,968 [Maya] Did I go too far today? 490 00:23:43,343 --> 00:23:47,226 [Anna] I mean, like, it was definitely, like, intense. 491 00:23:47,309 --> 00:23:50,232 I probably shouldn't have said that about his dad. 492 00:23:50,315 --> 00:23:52,236 [Anna] Yeah. I mean, it was crazy. 493 00:23:52,319 --> 00:23:55,284 -But, like, his dad did die. It's just a fact. -Oh, wait, Na. 494 00:23:55,367 --> 00:23:56,954 Oh! Mayi? 495 00:23:58,290 --> 00:24:00,169 Mayi? Hello? 496 00:24:00,252 --> 00:24:01,922 -Hold on. -OK. 497 00:24:04,010 --> 00:24:07,517 [Shuji voice-over reading] 498 00:24:10,773 --> 00:24:11,817 [Anna] What you doing? 499 00:24:13,654 --> 00:24:15,240 I mean, Maya, are you there? 500 00:24:17,119 --> 00:24:19,833 -Oh, my God, Na! -Oh, my God, what? 501 00:24:21,419 --> 00:24:23,633 -Oh, my God! -What? 502 00:24:26,722 --> 00:24:28,893 Holy f-balls! 503 00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:31,894 [Maya] Can't do this. 504 00:25:34,900 --> 00:25:36,904 I don't wanna face everyone. 505 00:25:39,241 --> 00:25:41,580 I don't wanna do seventh grade. 506 00:25:42,707 --> 00:25:44,418 I'm not doing seventh grade by myself. 507 00:25:44,503 --> 00:25:46,255 No, it's gonna be a lot easier for you now. 508 00:25:46,339 --> 00:25:48,009 I mean, like, you should go. 509 00:25:49,554 --> 00:25:50,556 Maya. 510 00:25:51,975 --> 00:25:54,773 You are my actual rainbow gel pen 511 00:25:55,817 --> 00:26:00,242 in a sea of blue and black writing utensils, like... 512 00:26:00,910 --> 00:26:02,079 -I'm not doing it alone. -Really? 513 00:26:02,162 --> 00:26:03,373 Yeah! Duh! 514 00:26:03,874 --> 00:26:06,045 -So we'll do it together? -Yeah. 515 00:26:06,129 --> 00:26:08,466 Just one step at a time. It's not like it's gonna last forever. 516 00:26:08,551 --> 00:26:09,970 -Yeah, it's not. -Like... 517 00:26:10,053 --> 00:26:11,515 And, like, I'll do it you do it. 518 00:26:12,099 --> 00:26:13,561 OK. I'll do it if you do it. 519 00:26:13,644 --> 00:26:14,563 OK. I'll do it if you do it. 520 00:26:14,646 --> 00:26:16,482 OK. I'll do it if you do it. 521 00:26:20,700 --> 00:26:21,869 Wait. 522 00:26:23,581 --> 00:26:26,753 We have to do it at the exact same time, OK? 523 00:26:29,551 --> 00:26:32,139 One, two... 524 00:26:34,644 --> 00:26:37,692 ♪ I wish I could tie you up in my shoes ♪ 525 00:26:37,775 --> 00:26:40,071 ♪ Make you feel unpretty too ♪ 526 00:26:40,155 --> 00:26:43,203 ♪ I was told I was beautiful ♪ 527 00:26:43,286 --> 00:26:45,415 ♪ But what does that mean to you? ♪ 528 00:26:45,499 --> 00:26:48,631 ♪ Look into the mirror Who's inside there ♪ 529 00:26:48,714 --> 00:26:50,718 ♪ The one with the long hair ♪ 530 00:26:50,801 --> 00:26:55,268 ♪ Same old me again today, yeah ♪ 531 00:26:56,395 --> 00:26:59,276 ♪ You can buy your hair if it won't grow ♪ 532 00:26:59,401 --> 00:27:01,865 ♪ You can fix your nose if he says so ♪ 533 00:27:01,990 --> 00:27:05,497 ♪ You can buy all the make-up That M. A. C can make ♪ 534 00:27:05,873 --> 00:27:09,923 ♪ But if you can't look inside you ♪ 535 00:27:10,006 --> 00:27:12,094 ♪ Find out who am I to ♪