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The first moment
that I tried to pull away from him,
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he just grabbed me by my throat
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and squeezed so hard,
4
00:00:27,123 --> 00:00:28,603
and I was terrified.
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I knew that there was only one way
for it to end.
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And, uh…
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00:00:41,163 --> 00:00:44,483
I wasn't willing to let it
end with me dead.
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I just knew, like, I had to…
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00:01:09,043 --> 00:01:10,363
I had to fight back.
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00:02:16,523 --> 00:02:19,403
I always saw my parents being very loving.
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I can remember, you know, my dad kissing
my mom good morning in the kitchen, and…
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I always wanted that.
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My name is Jema Donahue.
14
00:02:37,723 --> 00:02:40,843
I was sentenced to ten years
in the Department of Corrections.
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I was born in Berlin, Germany.
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My father was in the military.
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I was the baby of the family.
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You know, everybody says
the baby is spoiled,
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00:02:56,723 --> 00:02:59,323
but that wasn't the case in,
in, uh, my household.
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I didn't get away with anything.
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Like, I was almost punished
before it ever even happened.
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We didn't really have friends
because we moved every, like, five years.
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So, we just really loved
and embraced each other as a family.
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00:03:32,003 --> 00:03:35,243
I was homeschooled
from second grade until sixth grade.
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And then my mother decided to enroll
my brother and I in public school.
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The children were
a lot more advanced than I was.
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They just knew more
about the world around them,
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whereas I feel
that we were kind of kept in a bubble.
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00:04:00,603 --> 00:04:03,723
My last year in middle school
was really hard.
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After the assault,
I had begged my mom not to call the police
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because I just wanted to act like
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nothing had ever happened.
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And she promised me that she wouldn't,
and then she did.
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00:04:32,803 --> 00:04:36,363
I do remember law enforcement
was trying to deter my mom
35
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as far as pressing charges,
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which, of course, my mother,
she's a mama bear,
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so she was like, "No,
she's gonna continue this."
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00:05:09,523 --> 00:05:11,963
I experienced a lot of bullying.
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00:05:12,843 --> 00:05:15,403
I had to leave the school district.
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I blame my mother, um…
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00:05:21,283 --> 00:05:25,403
for a lot that happened, um,
when I was a teenager.
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She became so protective.
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00:05:29,483 --> 00:05:32,363
I really wasn't allowed to have friends.
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00:05:33,483 --> 00:05:36,163
My mom would do background checks
on everybody.
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00:05:37,083 --> 00:05:39,323
So I stayed at home a lot.
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00:05:55,123 --> 00:05:59,963
Everybody around me was telling me that,
you know, that I ruined my life.
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And the day that I gave birth to my son
48
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and looked in his eyes…
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00:06:05,883 --> 00:06:06,723
…I knew
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00:06:08,363 --> 00:06:11,523
there was nothing I wouldn't do…
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…for my children.
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There's nothing in the world
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00:06:25,923 --> 00:06:29,203
like coming home
from a hard day at work and…
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walking through that door
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00:06:32,083 --> 00:06:36,123
and your children just running up to you
and wrapping their arms around you.
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I need a moment.
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00:07:12,563 --> 00:07:15,203
We were introduced from a mutual friend.
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Javon had went to prison,
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so he was being released from prison.
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00:07:20,723 --> 00:07:23,683
And the same mutual friend had asked me
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if I would let him use my address
as a home plan.
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And I said yes.
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00:07:34,043 --> 00:07:39,803
I remember, um, just being so curious
about his childhood
64
00:07:39,883 --> 00:07:42,643
because it was so different from mine, um…
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00:07:43,843 --> 00:07:46,483
He bounced around a lot and, um…
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00:07:47,443 --> 00:07:50,083
that was new to me,
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00:07:50,163 --> 00:07:51,683
and it was almost tragic.
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00:07:53,283 --> 00:07:55,763
He was previously, um, incarcerated
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00:07:55,843 --> 00:07:59,043
for manufacturing
and distribution of drugs.
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00:07:59,603 --> 00:08:02,243
But I believed
that he had been rehabilitated
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and changed his life around.
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So, from the very beginning,
I just had this…
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longing, like I needed to protect him.
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00:08:15,483 --> 00:08:18,843
We never really established
that we were going to be together.
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00:08:19,323 --> 00:08:21,283
It just kind of sort of happened.
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I was going
to University of Central Missouri.
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And he would stay at home with the kids.
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And that spoke volumes to me
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that he could be trusted with my children.
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The officer at the time said to me
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00:09:00,763 --> 00:09:05,323
Javon was a well-known
crack cocaine dealer in that county.
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00:09:06,163 --> 00:09:07,843
And I was just floored
83
00:09:07,923 --> 00:09:13,883
because I had never
heard or seen anything like that.
84
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And that was like the first
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00:09:17,883 --> 00:09:19,563
instance I ever realized
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00:09:19,643 --> 00:09:22,043
that maybe there were things
going on behind my back
87
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that I wasn't exactly aware of.
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00:09:29,603 --> 00:09:31,283
I was angry with Javon.
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00:09:31,803 --> 00:09:34,563
And I was like,
"You just need to go. Leave us alone."
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00:09:35,563 --> 00:09:40,003
And he just grabbed me by my throat
and squeezed so hard
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00:09:40,083 --> 00:09:42,363
and was, like, choking me.
92
00:09:42,443 --> 00:09:45,883
I remember to the point that
I couldn't breathe and I was terrified.
93
00:09:45,963 --> 00:09:49,003
And he was telling me, like,
"You're never gonna leave me."
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00:09:49,483 --> 00:09:54,163
"The only way that you'll ever leave me
is if I kill you, bitch."
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00:09:57,203 --> 00:10:00,123
I remember saying to him,
like, "I love you."
96
00:10:00,603 --> 00:10:02,323
"Why are you doing this to me?"
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And he would tell me,
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00:10:06,403 --> 00:10:07,923
"Fear lasts longer than love."
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00:10:08,003 --> 00:10:10,243
Like he never wanted to hear…
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00:10:11,443 --> 00:10:13,043
…um, that I loved him.
101
00:10:30,843 --> 00:10:34,043
I would tell myself
that if I could just help him
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or get him away from the drug scene
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that our marriage would be better.
104
00:10:41,163 --> 00:10:45,723
But the abuse with Javon
continued throughout our marriage.
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I learned really early on
106
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that the less that I struggled
during a strangulation,
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the quicker I would pass out.
108
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And that made things easier.
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I do believe
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that Javon loved me.
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But the only way he knew how to show me
was through violence.
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It was just…
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a nightmare,
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00:11:17,163 --> 00:11:19,483
but I think that also is what made
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the good times so good,
116
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because they were
so far and few in between…
117
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…and we cherished them.
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I didn't really want anyone to know
how bad it was,
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00:12:11,723 --> 00:12:15,883
so I just tried to keep it under wraps
and appease him.
120
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But then he was closer to his old friends
and started using drugs again,
121
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and it just got ugly.
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He locked me in the room.
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Beat me with a belt.
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00:12:34,763 --> 00:12:35,723
Um…
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Held knives and screwdrivers to my neck
as he would sexually assault me.
126
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And he would be just telling me,
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"I will kill everybody.
I have nothing to lose."
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And I believed him.
129
00:12:53,003 --> 00:12:54,963
I knew, at this point…
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something had to change
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because now it wasn't about me.
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00:13:01,683 --> 00:13:05,403
He wasn't just hurting me.
He was threatening to hurt everybody.
133
00:13:30,723 --> 00:13:32,643
Which brought us to Good Friday,
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00:13:33,283 --> 00:13:36,483
which would have been April 14th of 2017.
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00:13:39,283 --> 00:13:41,683
I just remember being really anxious
136
00:13:42,843 --> 00:13:47,683
because it was gonna be the first time
since obtaining the order of protection
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that I was going to be alone in the house.
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I went downstairs.
139
00:14:00,963 --> 00:14:03,443
And when I opened up the family room door…
140
00:14:06,203 --> 00:14:08,003
…Javon was standing there.
141
00:14:10,083 --> 00:14:14,763
He flew forward at me,
grabbed me by my throat.
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00:14:14,843 --> 00:14:18,243
He started dragging me up the stairs, um…
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00:14:20,523 --> 00:14:21,603
…um, by my neck.
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00:14:22,363 --> 00:14:25,203
The scariest thing in the world
is to know that somebody else…
145
00:14:26,403 --> 00:14:28,563
…is holding your life in their hands.
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00:14:31,403 --> 00:14:34,163
He started checking
the windows and the doors,
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making sure they were all locked.
148
00:14:37,963 --> 00:14:40,803
He went back downstairs.
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00:14:42,723 --> 00:14:43,603
And then,
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00:14:44,523 --> 00:14:46,043
I heard him call my name.
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And… I went downstairs.
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00:14:54,043 --> 00:14:57,123
And when I stepped into
the bedroom…
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he was holding a gun.
154
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And he pulled the trigger.
155
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And the gun jammed. It didn't go off.
156
00:15:08,803 --> 00:15:12,603
So he became angry
that the gun was, like, not working
157
00:15:12,683 --> 00:15:14,763
and he hit me over the head with it.
158
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And whenever he did, um,
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it fell to the ground.
160
00:15:19,923 --> 00:15:23,083
So I picked it up,
and I just remember, like…
161
00:15:24,963 --> 00:15:27,723
aiming it at him, and, um…
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I told him, "I want-- Just leave.
Just get out."
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And he didn't want to.
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So he stepped forward,
165
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and whenever he made that forward motion,
I just pulled the trigger.
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I hit him about right here
in his left shoulder.
167
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And, um, he screamed,
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like, "Ah! You hit me!"
169
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And then lunged forward at me again, um,
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grabbed me by my wrists.
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So my hands were kind of up like this,
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and he had both my wrists,
173
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and I pulled the trigger again.
174
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And he was flinging me around
and slamming me to the ground.
175
00:16:08,923 --> 00:16:11,243
And in that motion,
I pulled the trigger again.
176
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Um…
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When he landed on top of me,
178
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like as we were coming down on the ground,
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he said, "Fuck it.
We're gonna die together, bitch."
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00:16:24,923 --> 00:16:28,443
And he laid his head right next to my head
181
00:16:28,523 --> 00:16:33,323
and he grabbed the back… handle,
like the butt of the gun,
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and aimed it towards his left ear.
183
00:16:35,763 --> 00:16:40,003
And I just wrapped my finger around
to grab control of the handle
184
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and pulled the trigger.
185
00:16:42,323 --> 00:16:43,803
And, um…
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I just remember that last final shot.
187
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Just feeling the weight of him
on top of me.
188
00:16:52,843 --> 00:16:54,403
Everything was black.
189
00:16:59,443 --> 00:17:01,763
I never realized my eyes were closed.
190
00:17:02,603 --> 00:17:05,563
Like, I thought it was black
because I was, like, dead.
191
00:17:05,643 --> 00:17:06,683
I thought it was…
192
00:17:09,563 --> 00:17:10,803
And then, um…
193
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I just kind of crawled out from under him
when I realized,
194
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like, "Okay, it's over. I'm not--
I'm not dead."
195
00:17:25,603 --> 00:17:27,563
My mom pulled up from work…
196
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…and the phone was ringing.
197
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And it's saying, like, Johnson County
on the caller ID.
198
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I have no recollection of calling 911,
but I remember that I did call 911.
199
00:17:45,163 --> 00:17:46,763
And I handed her the phone.
200
00:17:48,123 --> 00:17:50,283
And I was, like, shaking my head no.
201
00:17:50,363 --> 00:17:51,723
I was like, "Please."
202
00:17:52,403 --> 00:17:56,003
I just felt like, in that moment,
203
00:17:56,083 --> 00:17:59,883
my best decision
of protecting my family and my children
204
00:18:00,363 --> 00:18:01,803
was to not…
205
00:18:04,203 --> 00:18:05,363
let anybody know.
206
00:18:08,083 --> 00:18:09,643
My mom answered the phone.
207
00:18:12,723 --> 00:18:17,083
And, um, she said it was a mistake.
"We didn't mean to call."
208
00:18:18,643 --> 00:18:21,283
The dispatch then said to her, um…
209
00:18:22,803 --> 00:18:25,643
"We're gonna send somebody out
there anyways."
210
00:18:25,723 --> 00:18:27,123
So I went and sat outside…
211
00:18:28,283 --> 00:18:30,523
…and waited for the police.
212
00:18:32,883 --> 00:18:38,123
I remember my mom coming out
to the front step
213
00:18:38,203 --> 00:18:41,283
and kind of tapped me on my shoulder,
rubbed me, and said,
214
00:18:41,843 --> 00:18:44,523
"Come inside, Jem. No one's coming."
215
00:19:24,443 --> 00:19:26,243
My name is Margaret Heffernan,
216
00:19:26,803 --> 00:19:29,243
and I'm the mother of Jema Donahue.
217
00:19:37,843 --> 00:19:41,203
Jema is the youngest
of three of my children.
218
00:19:44,003 --> 00:19:48,443
I can remember her
as, um, an infant sitting on my lap,
219
00:19:48,523 --> 00:19:50,443
and I said, "You'll never be too old."
220
00:19:53,643 --> 00:19:55,683
She excelled in school.
221
00:19:59,323 --> 00:20:01,843
Things were going in the right direction
222
00:20:01,923 --> 00:20:07,003
until she was sexually assaulted
at the age of 13 by a 21-year-old man.
223
00:20:21,683 --> 00:20:24,803
I was given the excuse
that they couldn't locate him.
224
00:20:27,003 --> 00:20:28,763
I was very surprised.
225
00:20:38,723 --> 00:20:41,523
So I told my son to go to school.
226
00:20:42,563 --> 00:20:45,003
First one that could tell me where he is,
227
00:20:45,963 --> 00:20:47,963
I would give them a hundred dollars.
228
00:20:48,483 --> 00:20:51,403
And in 15 minutes, that phone rang
229
00:20:51,483 --> 00:20:53,603
and I was told where he was.
230
00:20:53,683 --> 00:20:54,843
And I went out
231
00:20:55,803 --> 00:20:57,883
and sat in the car
232
00:20:57,963 --> 00:21:00,363
and waited for him to come out to his
233
00:21:00,443 --> 00:21:01,523
and followed him.
234
00:21:04,683 --> 00:21:08,523
He started coming towards me
and swearing at me.
235
00:21:09,963 --> 00:21:12,003
It's like a switch went off on me.
236
00:21:13,563 --> 00:21:16,043
And I drove straight for him.
237
00:21:17,203 --> 00:21:19,523
I was going to hit him.
238
00:21:22,523 --> 00:21:25,163
And the individual jumped over hedges.
239
00:21:30,203 --> 00:21:32,723
I lost common sense,
I guess you could say.
240
00:21:35,163 --> 00:21:38,523
I had the sheriff's department
come out to my house.
241
00:21:41,963 --> 00:21:43,403
They said, um…
242
00:21:43,483 --> 00:21:46,963
well, possibly,
if I don't press charges against him,
243
00:21:47,443 --> 00:21:49,643
they won't press charges against me.
244
00:21:50,163 --> 00:21:52,283
And I said I would not drop the charges.
245
00:21:54,843 --> 00:21:56,803
Jema was very angry with me
246
00:21:57,443 --> 00:22:01,683
for contacting, um, the police.
247
00:22:02,283 --> 00:22:04,363
She felt that I betrayed her,
248
00:22:04,443 --> 00:22:07,763
and, um, our relationship, I would say,
249
00:22:07,843 --> 00:22:11,723
was damaged through her teenage years
because of that.
250
00:22:14,803 --> 00:22:17,283
You want to protect your child.
251
00:22:19,203 --> 00:22:22,643
And you want to be able
to handle a situation.
252
00:22:23,963 --> 00:22:25,563
And it was out of my hands.
253
00:22:53,563 --> 00:22:54,843
I questioned him,
254
00:22:55,803 --> 00:22:58,803
and I said, "Did you put your hands
on my daughter?"
255
00:22:59,403 --> 00:23:00,763
And he didn't answer me.
256
00:23:01,243 --> 00:23:04,963
And I told him, "You just answered me
by saying nothing."
257
00:23:05,043 --> 00:23:08,883
I says, "Promise me you will never
lay your hands on her again,"
258
00:23:09,643 --> 00:23:11,203
and he wouldn't say the words.
259
00:23:14,883 --> 00:23:18,483
I'm angry that
he hurt my daughter repeatedly.
260
00:23:21,603 --> 00:23:25,843
Especially, you know, when I asked him,
"Please don't."
261
00:23:31,083 --> 00:23:33,483
She's a survivor of domestic violence.
262
00:23:34,923 --> 00:23:36,283
It was self-defense.
263
00:23:38,843 --> 00:23:43,363
Nobody knows what they're going to do
until they're in the situation,
264
00:23:44,323 --> 00:23:45,443
and…
265
00:23:47,723 --> 00:23:48,763
and it's done.
266
00:24:23,123 --> 00:24:25,123
My name's Aaron Brown,
and I'm a major here
267
00:24:25,203 --> 00:24:27,603
with the Johnson County, Missouri
Sheriff's Office.
268
00:24:30,163 --> 00:24:31,923
I got a call from a-- a source.
269
00:24:37,043 --> 00:24:39,803
They advised that, um, Javon Donahue
270
00:24:40,563 --> 00:24:44,203
was, in fact, shot and killed
by his wife Jema.
271
00:24:44,723 --> 00:24:47,963
Um… And during the process of that,
272
00:24:48,043 --> 00:24:51,563
um, the body was taken to the farm
and buried on the farm.
273
00:25:01,483 --> 00:25:03,963
We went out to the residence,
uh, the farm.
274
00:25:04,923 --> 00:25:07,203
But Johnson County is, is a rural county.
275
00:25:08,163 --> 00:25:11,443
It's a cattle-grazing, uh, farms area.
276
00:25:11,523 --> 00:25:13,723
Um, so just merely driving down a road,
277
00:25:13,803 --> 00:25:16,883
uh, you're not able to see terribly much,
just the house.
278
00:25:23,963 --> 00:25:27,643
We needed a helicopter or a plane
to go overhead to look at this property.
279
00:25:44,083 --> 00:25:46,003
At this point, it is a crime scene.
280
00:25:46,923 --> 00:25:47,883
So we tape it off,
281
00:25:47,963 --> 00:25:51,723
uh, we begin coordinated interviews
with everybody that was on the property
282
00:25:51,803 --> 00:25:52,643
or in the house.
283
00:25:54,403 --> 00:25:57,683
And during a conversation
with one of the individuals at the farm,
284
00:25:58,203 --> 00:26:01,843
they advised that they knew
where Javon was buried at on the property.
285
00:26:03,603 --> 00:26:05,083
And they led us to Javon.
286
00:26:09,323 --> 00:26:11,283
We dug up the body,
287
00:26:12,363 --> 00:26:16,043
wrapped in a white tarp
with rope around, uh, the tarp.
288
00:26:32,203 --> 00:26:33,963
We needed to locate those individuals
289
00:26:34,043 --> 00:26:36,163
and conduct interviews with them
immediately.
290
00:26:38,563 --> 00:26:41,043
And, uh, one of those
happened to be Jema's mom.
291
00:26:54,843 --> 00:26:55,963
Just shut it off.
292
00:26:57,003 --> 00:26:59,523
Just shut it off and I'll talk to you.
293
00:27:25,243 --> 00:27:30,643
I told them
I saw Jema standing outside, dazed.
294
00:27:32,483 --> 00:27:34,243
She said, "Javon is in the house."
295
00:27:34,323 --> 00:27:37,523
I says, "We need to call the police."
296
00:27:37,603 --> 00:27:39,563
"No, he's dead."
297
00:27:40,203 --> 00:27:42,123
I said, "Are you sure he's dead?"
298
00:27:42,603 --> 00:27:44,163
And she says, "He's dead."
299
00:27:52,523 --> 00:27:56,923
She had dialed 911 and hung up.
300
00:27:59,483 --> 00:28:01,163
911 called back.
301
00:28:03,043 --> 00:28:06,083
She's throwing the phone at me.
She's shaking her head no,
302
00:28:06,563 --> 00:28:08,403
back and forth, but no words.
303
00:28:10,163 --> 00:28:13,043
And I told them,
"I'm sorry to bother you,"
304
00:28:13,123 --> 00:28:14,563
that I made a mistake.
305
00:28:16,523 --> 00:28:20,323
And he said, "Unfortunately,
we still have to send somebody out."
306
00:28:20,803 --> 00:28:22,523
And I said, "I understand."
307
00:28:26,243 --> 00:28:28,003
I remember saying to her,
308
00:28:28,723 --> 00:28:30,283
"When the cops come, Jema,
309
00:28:31,243 --> 00:28:33,323
please let me tell them I did this."
310
00:28:35,883 --> 00:28:37,243
"I lived my life."
311
00:28:38,723 --> 00:28:40,443
"You have children to raise."
312
00:28:44,843 --> 00:28:48,043
She said, "No, Mom. I will not."
313
00:28:52,043 --> 00:28:53,763
But it's what I wanted to do.
314
00:28:58,523 --> 00:29:00,883
I let Jema down when she was 13,
315
00:29:01,563 --> 00:29:02,603
and I felt
316
00:29:03,963 --> 00:29:05,763
I can't do that again to her.
317
00:29:06,603 --> 00:29:12,243
I remember our relationship
just being undone
318
00:29:13,323 --> 00:29:14,643
overnight.
319
00:29:14,723 --> 00:29:16,683
I didn't want to go through that again.
320
00:29:26,643 --> 00:29:30,283
We were probably out there
a good 45 minutes, and they never came.
321
00:29:32,083 --> 00:29:36,603
And I told myself maybe this is
the way it's supposed to be.
322
00:29:41,443 --> 00:29:44,763
When the police didn't show up
at the house was the turning point
323
00:29:44,843 --> 00:29:47,843
that we'll take matters
into our own hands.
324
00:29:48,803 --> 00:29:52,203
I thought, "Okay, we can do this."
325
00:29:52,963 --> 00:29:54,763
"We can get away with this."
326
00:30:09,683 --> 00:30:11,523
We placed Javon's body
327
00:30:12,083 --> 00:30:14,203
in an area that he dug.
328
00:30:14,283 --> 00:30:17,283
And he says, "I don't want you to know
where I'm gonna bury him."
329
00:30:17,363 --> 00:30:19,323
"I have two other holes dug."
330
00:30:20,283 --> 00:30:23,483
And I thought,
"Well, that's good that I-- I won't know."
331
00:30:31,523 --> 00:30:35,723
I-- I prayed that Jema
was gonna be strong enough
332
00:30:35,803 --> 00:30:38,603
to keep her mouth shut
333
00:30:39,363 --> 00:30:41,683
and not share this with anybody.
334
00:30:41,763 --> 00:30:44,923
That we would have to go to our grave
335
00:30:45,843 --> 00:30:47,363
knowing what we did.
336
00:32:04,443 --> 00:32:06,203
My name is Dr. Lisa Witcher.
337
00:32:09,483 --> 00:32:15,123
And I was a state-appointed
forensic examiner, um, for Jema's case.
338
00:32:29,523 --> 00:32:32,563
When we're looking
at battered spouse syndrome,
339
00:32:33,763 --> 00:32:36,323
we're looking for the cycle of violence.
340
00:32:40,523 --> 00:32:43,203
Part one is this tension-building phase.
341
00:32:45,563 --> 00:32:50,403
So where you start seeing
the perpetrator of the abuse
342
00:32:50,483 --> 00:32:55,123
becoming triggered by either you
or the environment around them.
343
00:32:58,443 --> 00:33:02,403
The second phase
is the acute or crisis phase.
344
00:33:03,803 --> 00:33:06,083
That is when violence occurs.
345
00:33:08,883 --> 00:33:11,803
After that, the honeymoon phase,
346
00:33:12,883 --> 00:33:16,243
when the batterer promises
347
00:33:16,323 --> 00:33:18,163
to never let that happen again.
348
00:33:20,123 --> 00:33:22,163
And then the cycle starts over again.
349
00:33:28,923 --> 00:33:30,443
There was an incident.
350
00:33:30,523 --> 00:33:32,083
We were in a motel room.
351
00:33:34,083 --> 00:33:37,203
And Javon raped me, sodomized me,
352
00:33:37,283 --> 00:33:39,803
and afterwards, he called his friend
353
00:33:40,563 --> 00:33:43,283
and was kind of laughing and making jokes,
354
00:33:43,363 --> 00:33:48,843
saying, "How long is it gonna take her
to stop, like, bleeding?"
355
00:33:48,923 --> 00:33:50,963
Like, from my rectum. And…
356
00:33:52,243 --> 00:33:55,323
Just anything to humiliate me
or degrade me.
357
00:33:58,043 --> 00:34:01,523
You know, calling and bragging
about beating a woman…
358
00:34:04,083 --> 00:34:09,243
It's either a twisted call
for somebody to come intervene
359
00:34:09,803 --> 00:34:13,443
or it's truly despicable.
360
00:34:14,643 --> 00:34:18,763
It's truly someone
who believes that they have
361
00:34:19,803 --> 00:34:21,003
done what's right
362
00:34:21,643 --> 00:34:25,323
and taken what's theirs.
363
00:34:28,923 --> 00:34:32,043
I am surprised that Jema made it
as long as she did.
364
00:34:33,843 --> 00:34:36,763
And that she is alive
at the end of this story.
365
00:34:39,123 --> 00:34:41,363
Had he not come to the house that day,
366
00:34:42,043 --> 00:34:45,083
I don't think
he would have stopped pursuing her.
367
00:34:47,843 --> 00:34:50,883
She meets all of the factors
368
00:34:50,963 --> 00:34:52,963
that we look for, um,
369
00:34:53,043 --> 00:34:56,923
and that research has shown
is tied to women who become
370
00:34:57,883 --> 00:34:59,243
battered spouses.
371
00:35:19,643 --> 00:35:20,763
To my knowledge,
372
00:35:22,403 --> 00:35:25,723
battered spouse as a self-defense
373
00:35:25,803 --> 00:35:28,163
has not been successful yet in Missouri.
374
00:35:28,683 --> 00:35:32,643
It's been here a while, but it has not
really ever been a successful defense.
375
00:35:35,043 --> 00:35:35,883
Okay, come on.
376
00:35:37,003 --> 00:35:39,523
But the question wasn't whether or not
377
00:35:39,603 --> 00:35:42,003
she suffered
from battered spouse syndrome.
378
00:35:42,483 --> 00:35:46,363
It was whether or not
she used deadly force
379
00:35:46,443 --> 00:35:48,763
justifiably under the circumstances.
380
00:35:50,363 --> 00:35:55,643
A slap to the face
doesn't justify someone shooting someone.
381
00:35:57,923 --> 00:36:00,083
My name is Rob Russell,
382
00:36:00,763 --> 00:36:04,723
and I was the attorney
who prosecuted Ms. Jema Donahue
383
00:36:04,803 --> 00:36:06,843
for the homicide of Javon Donahue.
384
00:36:09,523 --> 00:36:12,723
As we were coming down
on the ground, he said,
385
00:36:13,203 --> 00:36:15,563
"Fuck it.
We're gonna die together, bitch."
386
00:36:15,643 --> 00:36:19,163
And he laid his head
right next to my head
387
00:36:19,243 --> 00:36:21,203
and he grabbed the butt of the gun
388
00:36:21,283 --> 00:36:23,843
and aimed it towards his left ear.
389
00:36:23,923 --> 00:36:25,883
And I just wrapped my finger around
390
00:36:26,523 --> 00:36:27,883
and pulled the trigger.
391
00:36:28,603 --> 00:36:33,843
And, um, I just remember
that last final shot. Just…
392
00:36:34,323 --> 00:36:37,123
feeling the weight of him on top of me.
393
00:36:38,683 --> 00:36:39,523
Well,
394
00:36:40,483 --> 00:36:45,523
her story doesn't match up
with the injuries suffered by Mr. Donahue.
395
00:36:49,123 --> 00:36:50,883
There are four bullets in his body.
396
00:36:53,083 --> 00:36:55,483
One is in the shoulder.
397
00:36:56,363 --> 00:37:00,323
One is through his jaw.
398
00:37:00,403 --> 00:37:02,483
One is in the back of his head.
399
00:37:02,963 --> 00:37:05,563
And one is underneath his chin,
straight up.
400
00:37:07,203 --> 00:37:10,283
The shot to the back of the head
would have been a fatal shot.
401
00:37:10,763 --> 00:37:14,243
The shot underneath his chin
was a fatal shot.
402
00:37:14,323 --> 00:37:17,203
His jaw would have been broken
403
00:37:17,283 --> 00:37:21,603
in such a way that he would not
have been able to talk to her
404
00:37:21,683 --> 00:37:23,363
and tell her that he loved her
405
00:37:23,443 --> 00:37:26,803
in this Romeo and Juliet moment,
they were both going to die together.
406
00:37:26,883 --> 00:37:29,803
That didn't happen
because he couldn't talk.
407
00:37:31,803 --> 00:37:34,883
So, I don't think the jury really
408
00:37:35,803 --> 00:37:39,803
bought into
that she was acting in self-defense.
409
00:37:43,123 --> 00:37:45,883
Certainly, when people try to…
410
00:37:46,523 --> 00:37:49,043
hide evidence of homicide,
411
00:37:49,123 --> 00:37:50,843
and certainly hiding the body
412
00:37:52,123 --> 00:37:54,123
tends to give you the impression
413
00:37:54,203 --> 00:37:57,603
that the person who's doing that
has a guilty conscience.
414
00:38:09,043 --> 00:38:14,163
If they had accepted the self-defense
argument from Ms. Donahue,
415
00:38:14,643 --> 00:38:16,803
she would have been found
completely not guilty.
416
00:38:17,923 --> 00:38:22,123
But instead,
they found her guilty of manslaughter.
417
00:38:45,043 --> 00:38:49,923
I think that the decisions
that were made after Javon was killed
418
00:38:50,403 --> 00:38:52,043
did put her in prison.
419
00:38:54,763 --> 00:38:57,683
The dedication to burying the body
420
00:38:58,323 --> 00:39:03,203
really stuck in the craw
of a lot of the jury members.
421
00:39:09,563 --> 00:39:12,563
Her mom certainly
could have acted differently.
422
00:39:14,363 --> 00:39:18,123
I don't know if in her mother's mind
423
00:39:18,203 --> 00:39:20,123
that that was really a choice,
424
00:39:23,283 --> 00:39:26,203
but the concealment of Javon's body
425
00:39:26,283 --> 00:39:28,683
made things a lot worse for Jema.
426
00:39:33,203 --> 00:39:35,243
I blame my mother, um…
427
00:39:36,643 --> 00:39:40,843
for a lot that happened,
um, when I was a teenager.
428
00:39:42,043 --> 00:39:44,923
I really wasn't allowed to have friends.
429
00:39:45,443 --> 00:39:48,243
My mom would do background checks
on everybody.
430
00:39:48,803 --> 00:39:50,923
So I stayed at home a lot.
431
00:39:53,323 --> 00:39:56,843
You know, becoming a social pariah
432
00:39:57,443 --> 00:40:01,003
at a very young age
for a sexual assault she could not help.
433
00:40:02,323 --> 00:40:03,323
Then the…
434
00:40:04,003 --> 00:40:08,643
the withholding
of any type of social relationship.
435
00:40:09,163 --> 00:40:13,443
Essentially, what her mom was doing
was holding her hostage.
436
00:40:14,363 --> 00:40:19,523
Holding her in such a safe place,
437
00:40:20,563 --> 00:40:26,123
um, that it went overboard.
It went overboard into, quite honestly,
438
00:40:26,203 --> 00:40:28,123
emotional abuse.
439
00:40:28,203 --> 00:40:30,923
Um, not letting your child
out of the house ever.
440
00:40:31,003 --> 00:40:36,003
Not letting her socialize
in any normal type of way
441
00:40:36,083 --> 00:40:40,203
certainly sets up
a sense of learned helplessness.
442
00:40:41,723 --> 00:40:44,643
I don't think
there's anything malicious about it.
443
00:40:45,603 --> 00:40:49,683
I just do not believe
their relationship has ever been healthy.
444
00:41:02,043 --> 00:41:07,003
Jema describes her mother
as "an evil, wicked woman
445
00:41:07,083 --> 00:41:09,763
who is controlling and vengeful."
446
00:41:09,843 --> 00:41:13,723
"If she has the chance, she will kill me.
I'm sure of it."
447
00:41:14,723 --> 00:41:18,123
"She will bury me
like she did my husband."
448
00:41:20,243 --> 00:41:23,323
It's very possible that the line,
449
00:41:23,403 --> 00:41:26,363
"She will bury me
like she buried my husband,"
450
00:41:26,923 --> 00:41:30,483
was Jema's acknowledgement of
451
00:41:30,563 --> 00:41:34,443
"I'm into this even further now
because of her involvement."
452
00:41:41,643 --> 00:41:43,803
During my trial, um…
453
00:41:44,443 --> 00:41:47,163
I had a strained relationship
with my parents.
454
00:41:49,163 --> 00:41:50,843
I was drinking.
455
00:41:50,923 --> 00:41:55,203
I was abusing drugs. Um…
456
00:41:56,603 --> 00:42:01,243
Do I think today that my mother
would kill me or bury me in a field?
457
00:42:02,003 --> 00:42:02,843
No.
458
00:42:05,123 --> 00:42:07,363
We've come so far.
459
00:42:08,843 --> 00:42:10,483
It's not even the same relationship.
460
00:42:10,563 --> 00:42:12,523
Like, we're not even the same people.
461
00:42:13,523 --> 00:42:16,883
I've made great strides,
and she's made great strides.
462
00:42:21,923 --> 00:42:24,123
I've changed as a parent
463
00:42:24,203 --> 00:42:26,643
realizing that
464
00:42:28,403 --> 00:42:32,363
my ways of being a helicopter mom
over an adult was wrong.
465
00:42:34,123 --> 00:42:37,443
It's-- It's their life, their choice,
their decisions,
466
00:42:37,523 --> 00:42:39,603
and their consequences.
467
00:42:42,563 --> 00:42:46,443
This part of me that always had
to be in control and fix problems.
468
00:42:47,403 --> 00:42:50,603
Why give myself more problems
than I already have, you know?
469
00:42:50,683 --> 00:42:51,603
It's just, um…
470
00:42:51,683 --> 00:42:54,403
It's not my problem.
I don't need to fix it.
471
00:42:57,603 --> 00:43:00,083
Of course, I would do things differently.
472
00:43:02,163 --> 00:43:04,243
I blame the police not showing up.
473
00:43:04,963 --> 00:43:08,843
But ultimately, I, I told them,
like, "You don't have to come."
474
00:43:09,763 --> 00:43:10,963
"It was a mistake."
475
00:43:12,803 --> 00:43:15,563
So I started that.
476
00:43:16,523 --> 00:43:19,603
I started that with a lie.
477
00:43:22,323 --> 00:43:25,163
And the day had to come
where I had to acknowledge it.
478
00:43:29,643 --> 00:43:31,043
I have learned a lot,
479
00:43:31,123 --> 00:43:34,323
you know, about accountability
480
00:43:35,243 --> 00:43:36,363
and the importance of it
481
00:43:36,443 --> 00:43:39,123
in order for a person
to learn by their mistakes.
482
00:43:42,243 --> 00:43:44,683
I have seen such improvement in Jema
483
00:43:46,283 --> 00:43:48,243
since she's been incarcerated.
484
00:43:50,723 --> 00:43:53,843
She lights up when I see her,
when I visit her.
485
00:43:54,883 --> 00:43:58,243
And always a big hug, a kiss on the cheek.
486
00:44:00,923 --> 00:44:04,643
That's my daughter.
That's the baby that I had.
487
00:44:31,243 --> 00:44:33,403
When I first came to prison, um…
488
00:44:34,363 --> 00:44:37,083
life was in an uproar.
489
00:44:38,243 --> 00:44:42,003
But once I started to take advantage
of the different programs…
490
00:44:42,083 --> 00:44:44,003
I enrolled in, like, women's empowerment.
491
00:44:45,003 --> 00:44:49,523
I was able to kind of see my prison life
in a different light.
492
00:44:50,883 --> 00:44:53,603
It wasn't so much condemnation
493
00:44:53,683 --> 00:44:56,043
as much as rehabilitation.
494
00:44:58,443 --> 00:45:00,843
Also, in here,
495
00:45:01,523 --> 00:45:03,043
I've learned accountability
496
00:45:03,523 --> 00:45:07,603
because the fact is I still made
the choices that I made.
497
00:45:10,723 --> 00:45:14,003
The shot to the back of the head
would have been a fatal shot.
498
00:45:14,083 --> 00:45:17,403
The shot underneath his chin
was a fatal shot.
499
00:45:18,763 --> 00:45:23,843
He would not have been able to talk to her
and tell her that he loved her
500
00:45:23,923 --> 00:45:27,443
in this Romeo and Juliet moment,
they were both going to die together.
501
00:45:27,523 --> 00:45:29,043
That didn't happen.
502
00:45:30,803 --> 00:45:35,083
There was no Romeo and Juliet moment,
where Javon said, "Do you love me?"
503
00:45:35,163 --> 00:45:39,363
He said, "We're gonna die together, bitch.
Till death do us part."
504
00:45:39,443 --> 00:45:40,403
Those were his words
505
00:45:40,483 --> 00:45:43,483
as he was flinging me around
and slamming me to the ground.
506
00:45:44,923 --> 00:45:47,363
It's a really hard situation to decide,
507
00:45:47,443 --> 00:45:50,683
um… whose life is more important.
508
00:45:50,763 --> 00:45:53,763
Or do you take the chance
of fighting for your life?
509
00:45:56,003 --> 00:45:59,083
I hate the fact
510
00:45:59,163 --> 00:46:01,643
that I have to wake up every day…
511
00:46:02,643 --> 00:46:04,923
…and know that I took somebody's life.
512
00:46:05,003 --> 00:46:09,683
And on top of that,
it was someone's life whom I loved.
513
00:46:12,443 --> 00:46:14,203
I remember saying to her,
514
00:46:14,963 --> 00:46:16,563
"When the cops come, Jema,
515
00:46:17,083 --> 00:46:19,523
please, let me tell them I did this."
516
00:46:22,763 --> 00:46:24,243
And she said, "No, Mom."
517
00:46:25,083 --> 00:46:26,203
"I will not."
518
00:46:28,963 --> 00:46:31,563
I admire…
519
00:46:34,363 --> 00:46:38,883
…what my mother risked in helping me
520
00:46:38,963 --> 00:46:40,403
and trying to save me.
521
00:46:41,723 --> 00:46:44,843
She threw everything away.
522
00:46:45,883 --> 00:46:47,883
And honestly,
523
00:46:48,843 --> 00:46:51,483
I probably would do it
for my children as well.
524
00:46:54,123 --> 00:46:57,003
I mean, not go about it like that, but…
525
00:46:57,803 --> 00:47:02,163
we do what we need to
to protect and save our-- our babies.
526
00:47:12,123 --> 00:47:14,883
This time in our life is almost over, and…
527
00:47:17,123 --> 00:47:19,243
I see all good days ahead for us.