1
00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:11,845
[news theme plays]
2
00:00:11,928 --> 00:00:14,347
I'm Tucker Carlson,
and I don't like you either.
3
00:00:14,431 --> 00:00:17,892
Tonight, the most devastating assault yet
on our American way of life:
4
00:00:17,976 --> 00:00:21,354
A rampaging mob of women
violently protest at a Hooters.
5
00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:23,690
[dog barks]
6
00:00:23,773 --> 00:00:26,276
Them women are right. Hooters is sexist.
7
00:00:26,401 --> 00:00:29,446
Every time I apply,
they say my tits is too big.
8
00:00:30,530 --> 00:00:33,199
Help me!
9
00:00:33,283 --> 00:00:36,494
I hate to interrupt
this important "police work,"
10
00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:37,954
but I'm taking the day off.
11
00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:39,038
It's a...
12
00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:40,248
black holiday.
13
00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:42,042
What is it? Ashy Wednesday?
14
00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:43,668
Come on, Hopson. That's racist.
15
00:00:43,752 --> 00:00:45,045
Hmm, you're telling me.
16
00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:47,797
Chief only gave me a half day off
for Ashy Wednesday.
17
00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,340
Uh, no, today's, uh...
18
00:00:49,424 --> 00:00:52,010
Martin Lawrence King day.
19
00:00:52,093 --> 00:00:55,263
All right, all these black holidays
sound like a crock of...
20
00:00:56,014 --> 00:00:58,600
[he stutters]
I feel like I'm walking on eggshells here.
21
00:00:58,683 --> 00:01:00,018
[Hopson] Oh, those are mine.
22
00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:05,065
A celebrity we can't mention
has a health website
23
00:01:05,148 --> 00:01:09,861
and she said puttin' a couple eggs
up your keister balances the chakras.
24
00:01:09,944 --> 00:01:11,279
But they won't stay put.
25
00:01:11,362 --> 00:01:14,616
I guess there's too many miles
on my turd tunnel.
26
00:01:14,699 --> 00:01:15,867
[eggs squelch]
27
00:01:15,950 --> 00:01:16,950
[he farts]
28
00:01:17,368 --> 00:01:21,039
These feminist terrorists,
or as I call them, "Gal-Qaeda,"
29
00:01:21,122 --> 00:01:23,500
won't stop
until they take our manhood.
30
00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:24,417
Literally.
31
00:01:24,501 --> 00:01:27,003
Well, if they want to take
my tiny inverted penis
32
00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:29,964
they'll have to pry it
from the pink Barbie salad tongs
33
00:01:30,048 --> 00:01:31,800
I use to hold it when I urinate.
34
00:01:31,883 --> 00:01:34,969
[gasps] Gal-Qaeda's coming after
my favorite sexist restaurant
35
00:01:35,053 --> 00:01:37,388
and the sad remains
of my precious manhood.
36
00:01:37,514 --> 00:01:40,266
Dad, that's just
more Tucker Carlson bullshit.
37
00:01:40,350 --> 00:01:42,977
Like when he said
zombie raccoons were on the loose.
38
00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:46,147
Or that pandas
were sex-crazed killing machines.
39
00:01:47,023 --> 00:01:48,066
Or craziest of all,
40
00:01:48,149 --> 00:01:52,570
that Kanye West has said
some genuinely interesting things.
41
00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:55,073
Don't talk smack about Tucker Carlson.
42
00:01:55,156 --> 00:01:57,534
He's right.
Women have nothing to complain about.
43
00:01:57,617 --> 00:01:59,661
They can be anything they want these days.
44
00:01:59,744 --> 00:02:02,956
Like that celebrity we can't mention
who's clearly a doctor.
45
00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:05,542
- [Hopson farts]
- [chick tweets]
46
00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:08,461
I agree with Chief.
Sexism isn't that bad anymore.
47
00:02:08,545 --> 00:02:10,880
It's not like I have a lower salary
than the male officers.
48
00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:11,965
Exactly.
49
00:02:12,048 --> 00:02:14,676
They just also get a 22% penis bonus.
50
00:02:14,759 --> 00:02:16,219
Penis bonus?
51
00:02:16,302 --> 00:02:19,514
How about I solve pay inequality
by ripping your dongs off?
52
00:02:19,597 --> 00:02:21,141
Randall, what is this?
53
00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:23,226
Gina gets paid less than you idiots?
54
00:02:23,309 --> 00:02:26,020
She's your best cop.
I insist you pay her equally.
55
00:02:26,104 --> 00:02:27,438
No can do, Karen.
56
00:02:27,522 --> 00:02:30,150
Women's equality is dangerous.
Tucker said so.
57
00:02:30,233 --> 00:02:32,652
- How does that even make sense?
- Glad you asked.
58
00:02:34,946 --> 00:02:37,615
Women get the vote.
Women start wearing pants.
59
00:02:38,032 --> 00:02:39,826
Women get equal pay.
60
00:02:39,909 --> 00:02:41,744
Skipping ahead, skipping ahead...
61
00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:43,246
Pile of Terminator skulls.
62
00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:44,914
Okay, then. Apology accepted.
63
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,083
Fine. If you won't raise Gina's pay,
64
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:50,253
I'll do something to prove
women are just as valuable as men.
65
00:02:50,336 --> 00:02:53,298
I'm starting an all-women police force!
66
00:02:53,965 --> 00:02:55,466
[Karen yells]
67
00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:56,551
[Gina yells]
68
00:03:03,224 --> 00:03:06,102
Is this really all the women
we could find in this town?
69
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:08,146
A receptionist, a circus freak...
70
00:03:08,229 --> 00:03:09,397
That's a car.
71
00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:11,566
And what's the celebrity
we can't mention doing here?
72
00:03:11,649 --> 00:03:14,652
I'm just here to sell my diarrhea
to this old man.
73
00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:16,738
She says it cures dandruff.
74
00:03:22,577 --> 00:03:25,038
[murmurs and chatter]
75
00:03:25,121 --> 00:03:26,289
Everybody, shut up!
76
00:03:26,372 --> 00:03:29,792
The Kingpin is coming to update us
on Operation DD,
77
00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:32,712
or at least tell us what "DD" stands for.
78
00:03:33,254 --> 00:03:35,215
I hope it's Operation Double-D
79
00:03:35,298 --> 00:03:38,301
and we get implants
so we can titty-fuck each other...
80
00:03:40,386 --> 00:03:42,263
...is what the devil would say.
81
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:44,682
It is probably Operation Dilly-Dally
82
00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:48,228
because we have been waiting here
for one, two, three days!
83
00:03:48,311 --> 00:03:50,813
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
84
00:03:51,147 --> 00:03:54,651
Laugh is just coping mechanism
since wife died.
85
00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:58,029
She had stage one, two, three cancer.
86
00:03:58,112 --> 00:04:00,448
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
87
00:04:00,531 --> 00:04:01,531
[door opens]
88
00:04:03,493 --> 00:04:06,204
All right, Legion of Dooooom.
89
00:04:06,287 --> 00:04:09,040
Today, Operation DD goes into overdrive.
90
00:04:09,123 --> 00:04:10,792
Introducing houndstooth meth.
91
00:04:10,875 --> 00:04:13,419
It's ten times more potent
than argyle meth
92
00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:16,005
- and 100 times more fashion-forward.
- [zipper loosens]
93
00:04:16,547 --> 00:04:18,091
I've got the recipe,
94
00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:21,386
but to make it,
we need a tanker truck of methylamine.
95
00:04:21,594 --> 00:04:23,930
So let me introduce our new supplier,
96
00:04:24,013 --> 00:04:27,350
but let me warn you,
he's the lowest of the low.
97
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:30,645
An evil, slimy motherfucker.
98
00:04:31,229 --> 00:04:32,981
[rats squeak]
99
00:04:33,648 --> 00:04:36,192
Brett DeMarco, pharmaceutical sales rep.
100
00:04:36,276 --> 00:04:38,361
Oh, dear God!
101
00:04:38,444 --> 00:04:39,904
[croaks]
102
00:04:39,988 --> 00:04:41,614
We know you have many choices
103
00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:44,033
when choosing a soulless
money-obsessed drug company.
104
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:45,326
We appreciate your business.
105
00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:46,619
Brett, I can assure you,
106
00:04:46,703 --> 00:04:49,872
we're using this chemical
for legitimate scientific purposes,
107
00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:51,749
not to kill people.
108
00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:54,585
Ha! Like we care.
My company makes opioids.
109
00:04:54,669 --> 00:04:56,587
We killed 300 people
in the time it just took me
110
00:04:56,671 --> 00:04:58,381
to say "300 people."
[chuckles]
111
00:04:58,464 --> 00:05:02,093
Killed one, two, three hundred people!
112
00:05:02,176 --> 00:05:03,720
Ha, ha, ha.
113
00:05:03,803 --> 00:05:06,723
This is a crippling form of OCD.
114
00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:11,769
Alrighty! Welcome everybody
to Paradise's new all-men police force.
115
00:05:11,853 --> 00:05:13,521
Karen took over the police station,
116
00:05:13,604 --> 00:05:15,982
so, uh, thanks for letting us
use your crib, hobo cop.
117
00:05:16,065 --> 00:05:18,776
- [Hopson snores]
- [slurred] Well, uh, I want you guys
118
00:05:18,860 --> 00:05:20,570
to feel at home here.
119
00:05:20,862 --> 00:05:23,323
Alexa, play some salsa music.
120
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,454
I don't understand
why we have to work outside.
121
00:05:29,537 --> 00:05:31,457
What am I supposed to do,
just shit on the ground
122
00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:33,541
and kick dirt at it
like some kind of animal?
123
00:05:33,624 --> 00:05:35,793
Most dogs shit outside, Bullet.
124
00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:38,463
Yeah, well most people
don't sweat when they think.
125
00:05:38,546 --> 00:05:40,048
Oh, yeah? Well, most dogs...
126
00:05:40,131 --> 00:05:41,883
Hold on, let me think.
[grunts]
127
00:05:42,550 --> 00:05:44,844
Look, we don't need no police station,
128
00:05:44,927 --> 00:05:47,722
or Karen, or no TWAT team, right?
129
00:05:48,222 --> 00:05:49,807
"TWAT" team? Like "SWAT"?
130
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:51,016
Nobody?
131
00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:53,186
Alright, I'll think of something better.
[grunts]
132
00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:55,980
It's not just the station, Dad.
133
00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:58,066
Instead of giving up
a few dollars for Gina,
134
00:05:58,149 --> 00:06:01,861
you gave up the uniforms,
the squad cars, and all the weapons.
135
00:06:01,944 --> 00:06:04,364
So? We'll get new man uniforms
136
00:06:04,447 --> 00:06:06,532
and get new man squad cars
137
00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:08,284
and we'll get man weapons,
138
00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:10,036
crossbows, ninja stars,
139
00:06:10,119 --> 00:06:11,412
t-shirt cannons!
140
00:06:11,496 --> 00:06:13,706
- [they cheer]
- [Hopson] What the hell's going on?
141
00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:16,709
All right, Thester.
142
00:06:16,793 --> 00:06:19,295
This stuff is explosive,
so drive carefully.
143
00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:21,089
Save three seconds by taking
144
00:06:21,172 --> 00:06:23,716
unfinished, dangerous pothole road
on left.
145
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:25,593
- All right, then.
- [engine revs]
146
00:06:26,969 --> 00:06:28,721
[they groan and stutter]
147
00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:31,724
[groans]
Thester! You're gonna kill us!
148
00:06:31,808 --> 00:06:35,520
No, I'm not. Those masked bandits
behind us are going to kill us.
149
00:06:35,603 --> 00:06:36,603
What?
150
00:06:37,605 --> 00:06:39,666
- [gunfire]
- I spent every penny I have on this truck.
151
00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:40,690
Do something, Thester!
152
00:06:40,733 --> 00:06:41,651
I'm trying,
153
00:06:41,734 --> 00:06:44,779
but there's no "bandit ambush"
in the dropdown menu.
154
00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:47,657
How will I warn the other Wazers?
155
00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:49,283
[tires squeal]
156
00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:52,560
- [brakes screech]
- [Thester gasps]
157
00:06:53,162 --> 00:06:55,331
[brakes screech]
158
00:06:59,043 --> 00:07:00,461
Who are you?
159
00:07:00,545 --> 00:07:02,672
The Russians? The Chinese?
160
00:07:02,755 --> 00:07:04,298
Mumford and Sons?
161
00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:05,382
Oh, no!
162
00:07:06,008 --> 00:07:07,385
We're Gal-Qaeda.
163
00:07:07,468 --> 00:07:08,553
You're real?
164
00:07:08,636 --> 00:07:09,929
Holy shit!
165
00:07:10,012 --> 00:07:12,223
Tucker Carlson was right about something?
166
00:07:16,769 --> 00:07:18,104
All right, motherfucker.
167
00:07:18,187 --> 00:07:20,481
Give me everything out the register.
168
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:21,691
[register dings]
169
00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:23,734
And hand over two job applications.
170
00:07:23,818 --> 00:07:24,902
We noticed you're hiring.
171
00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:26,612
[sirens approach]
172
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,030
[rock music plays]
173
00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:30,658
Freeze! Paradise PD Men's Force.
174
00:07:30,741 --> 00:07:32,994
- [rock music]
- Get 'em!
175
00:07:33,077 --> 00:07:34,454
[Hopson groans]
176
00:07:36,205 --> 00:07:37,205
[Hopson farts]
177
00:07:38,249 --> 00:07:40,168
[Dusty munches] Mmm!
178
00:07:40,251 --> 00:07:42,753
Hopson, your ass eggs
are better than Denny's.
179
00:07:42,837 --> 00:07:45,381
Well, do something!
Ninja star 'em, Kevin.
180
00:07:46,215 --> 00:07:48,009
Fuck!! I forgot to let go.
181
00:07:48,092 --> 00:07:49,510
Boys, I'm going in.
182
00:07:49,927 --> 00:07:51,429
Now, that's a good cop.
183
00:07:51,512 --> 00:07:53,181
No, I just want to take a shit indoors.
184
00:07:53,264 --> 00:07:55,099
May I please get the restroom key?
185
00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:56,684
I don't know how I can thank...
186
00:07:57,477 --> 00:07:59,228
[Bullet groans]
..uh, you.
187
00:08:01,898 --> 00:08:04,901
Everyone relax. The real cops are here.
188
00:08:04,984 --> 00:08:05,985
[Gina grunts]
189
00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:08,654
[sighs] Hey, Carla.
190
00:08:09,071 --> 00:08:10,698
You're looking really good.
191
00:08:10,781 --> 00:08:12,533
I see you're waxing now.
192
00:08:12,617 --> 00:08:13,910
My entire body,
193
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:16,370
from my grill to my gas hole.
194
00:08:16,454 --> 00:08:17,914
[he stammers]
195
00:08:19,582 --> 00:08:21,542
[punching and groans]
196
00:08:21,626 --> 00:08:23,426
[muffled]
I think I got the worst end of this.
197
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:24,879
I beg to differ.
198
00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:31,385
This is a fucking disaster!
199
00:08:31,469 --> 00:08:34,430
The women's force
was supposed to get me good publicity.
200
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:37,475
But it's overshadowed
by your violent rage-fest.
201
00:08:37,558 --> 00:08:39,810
I do not need this in my life!
202
00:08:39,894 --> 00:08:41,854
On it! Fuck you, dying media.
203
00:08:44,148 --> 00:08:45,650
Violence is not the answer!
204
00:08:45,733 --> 00:08:47,985
It is for nine across, hun.
205
00:08:49,987 --> 00:08:51,989
Gina, I need good press,
206
00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:54,325
so you need to learn to be more ladylike,
207
00:08:54,408 --> 00:08:55,660
and I know the perfect teacher.
208
00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:59,205
Someone poised, polished
and the epitome of feminine grace.
209
00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:01,499
- Anton.
- [Anton squeals]
210
00:09:01,582 --> 00:09:02,667
Fear not, liebling.
211
00:09:02,750 --> 00:09:05,545
If I can teach Nancy Pelosi
to stop cupping her farts,
212
00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:06,671
I can work with anyone.
213
00:09:06,754 --> 00:09:09,757
You hired a man
to teach me how to be a lady?
214
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:12,343
Well, I could've hired a woman
for 22% less,
215
00:09:12,426 --> 00:09:14,345
- but I wanted someone good.
- [bristling sound]
216
00:09:14,595 --> 00:09:16,097
Can you not do that?
217
00:09:17,014 --> 00:09:19,016
What? I got gum stuck in it.
218
00:09:20,476 --> 00:09:23,563
I can't believe a woman
made us look like idiots!
219
00:09:23,646 --> 00:09:26,065
- You mean Gina?
- No, I mean Kevin.
220
00:09:26,148 --> 00:09:28,943
Don't worry. I've got the hang
of these ninja stars now.
221
00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:31,821
- Fuck!
- You throw like a fetus!
222
00:09:31,904 --> 00:09:33,072
A girl fetus!
223
00:09:33,155 --> 00:09:34,490
But I am going to fix that.
224
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:37,159
I'm going to teach you
how to be more unladylike.
225
00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:38,744
I am going to make you a man.
226
00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:40,371
Will you make me a man, too?
227
00:09:40,454 --> 00:09:43,916
He should be 6' 4 ",
look like Charlton Heston
228
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,544
and have three assholes.
229
00:09:50,548 --> 00:09:52,174
Where'd you get this houndstooth meth?
230
00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:55,469
- The Legion of Dooooo...
- Enough of your lies!
231
00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:58,431
Nein! A lady never interrupts a man
when he is speaking.
232
00:09:58,514 --> 00:10:00,099
But he's a piece-of-shit criminal.
233
00:10:00,182 --> 00:10:01,892
Ja, und if you interrupt him,
234
00:10:01,976 --> 00:10:03,603
he will never ask you to marry him.
235
00:10:03,686 --> 00:10:06,939
Robbie always says why marry the cow
when you can plow the cow for free?
236
00:10:07,023 --> 00:10:11,027
You can find that quote and many more
in my book, Proverbs for Perverts,
237
00:10:11,110 --> 00:10:12,820
available now at Barnes & Noble.
238
00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:17,950
All right. Here's lesson one
of how to be a man's man.
239
00:10:18,534 --> 00:10:20,494
Dad, what the hell are you doing?
240
00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:22,371
I'm going to teach you
how to make a campfire
241
00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:23,789
by rubbing two dicks together.
242
00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:26,626
Sticks. You rub two sticks together.
243
00:10:26,709 --> 00:10:28,419
Oh. Okay, then.
244
00:10:28,919 --> 00:10:31,172
Apparently, I was molested
in the Boy Scouts.
245
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:32,464
Many times.
246
00:10:35,968 --> 00:10:39,013
Help! That man stole my purse!
247
00:10:39,096 --> 00:10:40,096
I'll get him.
248
00:10:43,434 --> 00:10:44,352
Eventually.
249
00:10:44,435 --> 00:10:47,438
- That's it! Back straight, shoulders up.
- [Gina grunts]
250
00:10:53,861 --> 00:10:55,696
[she grunts and sighs]
251
00:10:57,948 --> 00:10:59,742
Nein! From the top.
252
00:10:59,825 --> 00:11:00,825
[she groans]
253
00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:05,373
Holy shit, Gina!
254
00:11:05,456 --> 00:11:06,749
You bought my book.
255
00:11:06,832 --> 00:11:09,710
Let me sign this for you.
Who should I make this shit out to?
256
00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:13,714
Next I'm going to teach you
the most manly thing a man can do.
257
00:11:13,798 --> 00:11:14,965
Headbutt a ram.
258
00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:17,259
What? No, I'm not gonna do that.
259
00:11:17,343 --> 00:11:20,054
What? Okay, sure, no problem.
That's reasonable.
260
00:11:20,137 --> 00:11:21,937
- Hey, your shoelace is untied.
- [ram snorts]
261
00:11:23,974 --> 00:11:25,518
Oh, shit!
[he stammers]
262
00:11:25,601 --> 00:11:26,852
Five second rule.
263
00:11:28,729 --> 00:11:31,315
Attaboy! Your first ram coma.
264
00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:33,067
Ooh, got a little brain-bleed there.
265
00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:35,277
Nothing a testosterone patch won't fix.
266
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:43,035
- Come on!
- [rustling]
267
00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:45,746
Ha! Kevin, you don't know shit.
268
00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:52,878
[she yells]
269
00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:56,924
Great. Operation DD is in the shitter
and all my money is gone.
270
00:11:57,007 --> 00:11:58,300
Not to worry, boss.
271
00:11:58,384 --> 00:12:01,178
I've got lots of ideas
that will make us money.
272
00:12:01,387 --> 00:12:04,890
Like decorative,
non-functioning trampolines
273
00:12:04,974 --> 00:12:06,851
for people who hate their kids,
274
00:12:07,143 --> 00:12:10,688
but still want the high status
of a trampoline owner.
275
00:12:10,771 --> 00:12:12,189
Shut the fuck up, Thester!
276
00:12:12,273 --> 00:12:14,233
Where are we? Why are you doing this?
277
00:12:14,316 --> 00:12:16,861
Because we as a sex
are tired of not being heard,
278
00:12:16,944 --> 00:12:18,070
so our plan is to...
279
00:12:18,154 --> 00:12:20,072
Okay. Let me stop you right there.
280
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:22,742
The first thing you need is a plan,
little lady.
281
00:12:22,825 --> 00:12:24,910
If you could stop mansplaining,
282
00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:26,871
we do have a plan. We...
283
00:12:26,954 --> 00:12:30,916
Okay, whoa. I can hear you.
You don't have to shout, tootsie.
284
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,145
- [she groans]
- I think what you're trying to say is...
285
00:12:33,169 --> 00:12:35,087
[he groans]
...sweetheart.
286
00:12:35,546 --> 00:12:38,674
- What's her problem, then?
- I don't know, I wasn't listening.
287
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:42,678
Okay, ladies. Listen up.
288
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:44,889
We've got a very serious crime
in progress.
289
00:12:44,972 --> 00:12:46,140
A jaywalker.
290
00:12:47,808 --> 00:12:50,478
Don't worry.
I'll stop him from jaywalking.
291
00:12:50,561 --> 00:12:52,521
Or any walking.
292
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:54,398
Nein, Gina. Be a lady.
293
00:12:54,482 --> 00:12:57,067
If you want to kill him,
kill him with kindness.
294
00:12:57,151 --> 00:12:59,445
Oh, fine. I'll try talking to him.
295
00:13:00,154 --> 00:13:01,530
Uh, hey there.
296
00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:03,115
[she stutters]
297
00:13:03,199 --> 00:13:04,867
Uh, you having a bad day?
298
00:13:04,950 --> 00:13:08,871
Wow! Your words have really
put me in touch with my feelings.
299
00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:11,499
Feelings of homicidal rage!
300
00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:13,375
[screaming]
301
00:13:13,834 --> 00:13:15,187
- [engine revs]
- [rock music plays]
302
00:13:15,211 --> 00:13:16,420
[Crawford laughs, then groans]
303
00:13:17,254 --> 00:13:20,174
Hey, Karen, your "vag-es with badges"...
304
00:13:20,257 --> 00:13:21,634
Sick burn, Crawford.
305
00:13:21,717 --> 00:13:24,178
...can't even handle a simple jay-killer.
306
00:13:24,261 --> 00:13:26,597
We are doing fine, thank you very much.
307
00:13:26,680 --> 00:13:28,182
[she screams]
308
00:13:28,265 --> 00:13:29,099
Hun.
309
00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:30,643
[she continues screaming]
310
00:13:30,726 --> 00:13:32,436
Don't worry. The men'll handle it
311
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,355
with our new secret weapon.
312
00:13:34,438 --> 00:13:36,148
[engine revs]
313
00:13:36,232 --> 00:13:37,650
Is that Kevin?
314
00:13:38,067 --> 00:13:39,109
♪ Kevin ♪
315
00:13:39,193 --> 00:13:41,987
♪ Rides two motorcycles
at the same time ♪
316
00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:44,198
♪ Doesn't understand
a self-checkout line ♪
317
00:13:44,281 --> 00:13:47,326
♪ Attends funerals in cargo pants ♪
318
00:13:47,409 --> 00:13:49,995
♪ Impregnates women with a single glance ♪
319
00:13:50,079 --> 00:13:52,665
♪ Takes a dump
but doesn't wash his hands ♪
320
00:13:52,748 --> 00:13:56,669
♪ Doesn't clap when the plane la-a-ands ♪
321
00:13:56,752 --> 00:13:58,045
♪ Kev Man ♪
322
00:14:00,673 --> 00:14:02,007
Ha, you missed.
323
00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:06,971
♪ Kev Ma-a-an! ♪
324
00:14:08,305 --> 00:14:10,099
[Fitz grunts]
325
00:14:10,182 --> 00:14:12,434
We'll never escape
with three guards to distract.
326
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:13,394
I gotta pee.
327
00:14:13,477 --> 00:14:14,478
I'll come with you.
328
00:14:14,562 --> 00:14:15,646
Me too!
329
00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:18,148
[he scoffs] Women.
330
00:14:18,232 --> 00:14:19,900
Now, if we could just get out of these...
331
00:14:20,734 --> 00:14:23,237
Oh, they just tied a bow.
332
00:14:23,737 --> 00:14:24,655
There's the exit!
333
00:14:24,738 --> 00:14:27,199
No way. We are not leaving
until we find that truck
334
00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:28,409
and get my investment back.
335
00:14:28,492 --> 00:14:31,745
But we're two men
in an all-lady compound.
336
00:14:31,829 --> 00:14:32,830
They'll notice us.
337
00:14:32,913 --> 00:14:35,040
Yeah, but they won't notice...
338
00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:37,376
Mrs. Doubtfire and Madea.
339
00:14:37,459 --> 00:14:40,337
Hey! Why are you two idiots
dressed as men dressed as women?
340
00:14:40,421 --> 00:14:41,881
Let's get out of here!
341
00:14:41,964 --> 00:14:43,299
In these heels?
342
00:14:48,929 --> 00:14:51,307
What the hell is all this?
343
00:14:51,390 --> 00:14:53,142
I'll tell you exactly what this is.
344
00:14:53,225 --> 00:14:55,269
- This is where we...
- Make meth.
345
00:14:55,352 --> 00:14:57,271
Ladies do like to cook.
[chuckles]
346
00:14:57,354 --> 00:14:58,856
Shop and cook.
347
00:15:01,650 --> 00:15:02,484
There.
348
00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:05,112
Now maybe I can speak
without you being condescending.
349
00:15:05,195 --> 00:15:08,282
[muffled speech]
350
00:15:08,365 --> 00:15:09,950
We're not making drugs.
351
00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:13,495
Methylamine can also be made
into a chemical that dissolves penises.
352
00:15:14,330 --> 00:15:16,165
Oh, look who's listening now!
353
00:15:16,248 --> 00:15:18,167
We just needed
the perfect delivery method.
354
00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:19,877
Hot wing sauce.
355
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:22,630
There are two things no man can resist.
356
00:15:22,713 --> 00:15:23,881
Buffalo wings
357
00:15:23,964 --> 00:15:26,675
and touching
their dirty, dirty ding-dongs.
358
00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:29,678
Since wing sauce
stays on your fingers for three days
359
00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:32,514
and no man can go half a day
without jerking it,
360
00:15:32,806 --> 00:15:35,893
we will rid the world of all penises!
[laughs]
361
00:15:35,976 --> 00:15:36,976
[buzzer sounds]
362
00:15:38,646 --> 00:15:40,230
[munches]
363
00:15:44,818 --> 00:15:46,487
Ehh.
[munches]
364
00:15:46,570 --> 00:15:49,073
We call our plan to dissolve dicks
365
00:15:49,156 --> 00:15:51,033
"Operation DD."
366
00:15:51,116 --> 00:15:54,244
What? Operation DD?
367
00:15:54,328 --> 00:15:57,998
You can't dissolve my dick
and steal my evil plan name.
368
00:15:58,082 --> 00:15:59,541
Let me handle this, boss.
369
00:15:59,625 --> 00:16:00,834
Here's our offer.
370
00:16:01,126 --> 00:16:04,672
You dissolve our dicks,
but we get to keep the name.
371
00:16:04,755 --> 00:16:07,967
- That's not a good deal, Thester.
- Then it's settled.
372
00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:10,928
You will dissolve our dicks
and keep the name.
373
00:16:14,598 --> 00:16:15,933
Now, that is a great headline.
374
00:16:16,016 --> 00:16:18,519
How is it great?
It says, "Male cop saves the day."
375
00:16:18,602 --> 00:16:19,895
Not that headline.
376
00:16:20,479 --> 00:16:21,522
This one!
377
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,692
Ooh, and look at your hips in this photo.
378
00:16:24,775 --> 00:16:26,193
Perfect for childbearing.
379
00:16:26,276 --> 00:16:28,070
Another 50 lessons with Anton
380
00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:30,489
and we'll make you
the best female cop yet.
381
00:16:30,572 --> 00:16:31,907
What? Fuck that noise!
382
00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:34,952
I didn't join the police force
to balance a book on my head.
383
00:16:35,035 --> 00:16:37,830
I joined to shoot people
and make lifelong friends like...
384
00:16:37,913 --> 00:16:41,583
creepy old guy and Dog the Talking Dog.
385
00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:42,918
I quit!
386
00:16:43,252 --> 00:16:45,754
Congratulations!
You're out of the workforce.
387
00:16:45,838 --> 00:16:47,673
You're now the ideal woman.
388
00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:50,342
You can finally marry
Tits-Hat Hillbilly Man.
389
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:53,846
My only request is that,
when we do our baby-making,
390
00:16:53,929 --> 00:16:55,806
you wear this here Delbert mask,
391
00:16:55,889 --> 00:16:58,017
'cause if you don't,
I'll be soft as a noodle.
392
00:16:58,434 --> 00:16:59,601
What'd I say? Ow!
393
00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:02,312
I am so proud of you, Kev Man.
394
00:17:03,564 --> 00:17:04,440
[gruff voice] Gay.
395
00:17:04,523 --> 00:17:06,692
[he sniffs] Look at me, I'm crying.
396
00:17:06,775 --> 00:17:10,362
From now on, we are gonna use
all of our resources on you.
397
00:17:10,446 --> 00:17:11,739
Time for more training.
398
00:17:12,239 --> 00:17:14,783
[Kevin grunts]
399
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:18,162
Ah, that's enough heavy work, Kevin.
Move on to the speed bag.
400
00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:25,252
Gimme my damn balls back.
401
00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:27,921
I cannot believe
you're making me do this, Chief.
402
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:30,591
Kev Man, can you go half speed, maybe?
403
00:17:30,674 --> 00:17:31,800
Ow!
404
00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:34,511
You know some poor fellow in Korea
had to animate that?
405
00:17:34,928 --> 00:17:36,764
Great training session, men.
406
00:17:37,181 --> 00:17:40,142
Let's meet back here
for the next session in, say, two minutes.
407
00:17:40,225 --> 00:17:43,020
Oh, to hell with this. I quit.
408
00:17:43,103 --> 00:17:46,106
I'm gonna start my own police force.
409
00:17:48,692 --> 00:17:50,444
If he can quit, I quit,
410
00:17:50,527 --> 00:17:52,571
to start my own police force.
411
00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:55,074
[they wheeze]
412
00:17:55,157 --> 00:17:57,117
[sighs]
Well, in the interest of the gag,
413
00:17:57,201 --> 00:17:58,911
I guess I can make a few calls.
414
00:18:01,413 --> 00:18:02,706
Who needs them?
415
00:18:02,790 --> 00:18:05,709
Kev Man, you're more man
than all of 'em combined,
416
00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:07,294
or at least you will be.
417
00:18:07,377 --> 00:18:10,464
I need to, uh, re-open your head wound
and change the dressing.
418
00:18:10,547 --> 00:18:11,547
No problem.
419
00:18:13,008 --> 00:18:14,008
[ram snorts]
420
00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:19,597
You know what?
421
00:18:19,973 --> 00:18:23,352
I don't think
this is going to turn out well for Kevin.
422
00:18:23,977 --> 00:18:26,146
There! A double bow.
423
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:28,607
Now it's time to meet our leader.
424
00:18:30,651 --> 00:18:32,277
Tucker Carlson?
425
00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:34,113
You'rebehind Gal-Qaeda?
426
00:18:34,196 --> 00:18:35,114
That's right!
427
00:18:35,197 --> 00:18:39,284
Spouting insane bullshit for years
was all part of my master plan.
428
00:18:39,368 --> 00:18:41,328
By saying Gal-Qaeda existed,
429
00:18:41,411 --> 00:18:43,455
I ensured no one would believe it.
430
00:18:43,539 --> 00:18:47,042
But why would a bunch of feminists
work for the likes of you?
431
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:50,170
Because we're not feminists.
We're the complete opposite.
432
00:18:50,254 --> 00:18:54,091
Women who work for Fox News!
Woo-hoo!
433
00:18:54,174 --> 00:18:56,051
Once I dissolve every dick,
434
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,345
I will have the biggest dick on Earth.
435
00:18:58,428 --> 00:19:02,141
No one will make fun
of my tiny inverted penis again.
436
00:19:02,224 --> 00:19:04,685
[he laughs]
437
00:19:06,103 --> 00:19:07,479
[he laughs]
438
00:19:07,563 --> 00:19:09,523
Damn, look at that thing!
439
00:19:09,606 --> 00:19:12,234
Looks like a pimple on John Goodman's ass.
440
00:19:12,401 --> 00:19:14,570
Looks like a, uh, oh...
441
00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:15,653
Come back to me.
442
00:19:15,696 --> 00:19:18,824
Looks like a peach Jelly Belly
stuck in quicksand.
443
00:19:18,907 --> 00:19:21,326
You're telling me! It looks like a, uh...
444
00:19:21,410 --> 00:19:22,661
Uh, pass.
445
00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:25,289
Looks like a caterpillar
coming out of a bad melon.
446
00:19:25,372 --> 00:19:28,792
- [Fitz laughs]
- Yep, we got him good, the both of us.
447
00:19:31,628 --> 00:19:32,629
[engine revs]
448
00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:36,216
♪ Kev Man
Puts ranch dressing on everything ♪
449
00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:39,553
♪ Kev Man
His bed is just a box spring ♪
450
00:19:39,636 --> 00:19:42,681
[he scats]
451
00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:45,267
[radio hisses]
A maniac is destroying Paradise.
452
00:19:45,350 --> 00:19:48,020
All assorted
ridiculous police forces respond.
453
00:19:48,478 --> 00:19:50,647
Copy that. Man Force, on the way.
454
00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:52,274
- [radio hisses]
- Kev Man, come in.
455
00:19:52,357 --> 00:19:54,526
Kev Man?
Must already be on the scene.
456
00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:55,610
[he gasps] Kevin!
457
00:19:55,652 --> 00:19:57,905
[screaming]
458
00:19:58,363 --> 00:19:59,990
[Kevin yells]
459
00:20:00,073 --> 00:20:02,492
Oh, no! He's too much man.
460
00:20:02,576 --> 00:20:04,912
I've created a "manster."
461
00:20:04,995 --> 00:20:06,079
♪ Manster! ♪
462
00:20:06,163 --> 00:20:08,624
♪ His theme song doesn't even need words ♪
463
00:20:08,707 --> 00:20:10,042
♪ Manster! ♪
464
00:20:10,125 --> 00:20:12,419
[sings nonsense words]
465
00:20:12,502 --> 00:20:14,671
[sirens wail]
466
00:20:15,297 --> 00:20:18,759
All right, you washed-up
cartoon characters, take him down.
467
00:20:19,343 --> 00:20:21,345
[Kevin yells]
468
00:20:22,095 --> 00:20:23,889
Get in there, Porky.
469
00:20:23,972 --> 00:20:24,848
[Porky stammers]
470
00:20:24,932 --> 00:20:25,932
Fuck that.
471
00:20:26,391 --> 00:20:28,310
What the hell did you do to our son?
472
00:20:28,393 --> 00:20:30,687
What? It's the same old Kevin.
473
00:20:33,398 --> 00:20:35,025
[he sniffs and grunts]
474
00:20:36,276 --> 00:20:37,276
Where's he going?
475
00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:39,780
Oh, there's only one place he's going.
476
00:20:39,863 --> 00:20:43,283
[grunting] Tits and wings!
477
00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:45,953
[munching]
478
00:20:46,036 --> 00:20:47,579
Mmm, these are good wings.
479
00:20:47,663 --> 00:20:49,957
Hey, you wanna masturbate here
or wait until we get home?
480
00:20:50,874 --> 00:20:51,750
[screaming]
481
00:20:51,833 --> 00:20:52,833
[Kevin growls]
482
00:20:59,633 --> 00:21:00,633
[he grunts]
483
00:21:01,802 --> 00:21:05,305
[Kevin growls]
484
00:21:05,389 --> 00:21:07,516
He won't kill us, will he?
He loves us, right?
485
00:21:07,599 --> 00:21:10,102
Oh, he loved Heathcliff
way more than he loves us.
486
00:21:10,185 --> 00:21:13,230
Call Gina. She's the only cop
tough enough to save us.
487
00:21:13,313 --> 00:21:15,440
Gina quit. I... I don't know where she is.
488
00:21:15,524 --> 00:21:17,985
I'm right here.
I get more respect at this job.
489
00:21:18,068 --> 00:21:19,068
Honk honk!
490
00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:20,946
I stand by my statement.
491
00:21:21,029 --> 00:21:23,740
Great, now beat the living shit
out of my only child and save us!
492
00:21:23,824 --> 00:21:26,076
- [Kevin growls]
- Nah, I don't think so.
493
00:21:26,159 --> 00:21:28,620
Not until I get an apology
for the way I've been treated.
494
00:21:28,704 --> 00:21:30,455
Randall, apologize to her,
495
00:21:30,539 --> 00:21:32,457
and give her equal pay, for fuck's sake!
496
00:21:32,541 --> 00:21:34,793
Uh, I guess we're gonna die here, Karen.
497
00:21:34,876 --> 00:21:35,752
Randall!
498
00:21:35,836 --> 00:21:38,755
I don't want an apology from him.
I want an apology from you.
499
00:21:38,839 --> 00:21:42,050
You made it seem like the new force
was about empowering women,
500
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:43,427
but it was just about you.
501
00:21:43,510 --> 00:21:44,845
Gina, you're right.
502
00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:47,764
I'm sorry. Women shouldn't hold women back
503
00:21:47,848 --> 00:21:49,599
from being violent psychos.
504
00:21:49,850 --> 00:21:52,311
So go full-on
Real Housewives of New Jersey.
505
00:21:52,394 --> 00:21:55,981
Thank you. Now, I have a ham-faced
knuckle-draggerto punch out.
506
00:21:57,566 --> 00:21:59,151
And now to deal with Kevin.
507
00:21:59,234 --> 00:22:00,234
[he growls]
508
00:22:02,988 --> 00:22:03,989
Huh?
509
00:22:06,283 --> 00:22:08,535
Can you put on this Robbie mask
and do that to me?
510
00:22:08,618 --> 00:22:10,912
[growling]
511
00:22:12,539 --> 00:22:14,666
Now to make you eat chicken wings.
512
00:22:14,750 --> 00:22:16,293
You'll get the sauce on your hands
513
00:22:16,376 --> 00:22:19,212
and then touch yourself
and dissolve your dick.
514
00:22:19,296 --> 00:22:22,049
Man, that seems unnecessarily complicated.
515
00:22:22,132 --> 00:22:24,259
Wouldn't it be simpler if we ate the wings
516
00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:26,261
and then jerked each other off?
517
00:22:26,345 --> 00:22:28,847
No, that would not be simpler, Thester.
518
00:22:28,930 --> 00:22:32,517
Or, since the sauce
will already be on our lips,
519
00:22:32,601 --> 00:22:33,685
a little...
[lip smacks]
520
00:22:33,769 --> 00:22:36,396
Shut up! I spent a lot of time on my plan.
521
00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,690
You have no idea how hard my life is.
522
00:22:38,774 --> 00:22:41,568
Tucker, so what
if you have a tiny inverted penis?
523
00:22:41,651 --> 00:22:43,236
You have a great life.
524
00:22:43,320 --> 00:22:45,447
You're famous everywhere I'm not welcome.
525
00:22:45,530 --> 00:22:47,199
It's not just the penis.
526
00:22:47,282 --> 00:22:49,743
I was born with other defects,
like this bald head,
527
00:22:49,826 --> 00:22:51,411
and the vein running down my chest,
528
00:22:51,495 --> 00:22:53,872
and my weird bulbous hairy feet.
529
00:22:53,955 --> 00:22:57,751
Tucker, you don't need an evil plan
to have the world's biggest dick!
530
00:22:57,834 --> 00:23:00,003
You are the world's biggest dick!
531
00:23:00,087 --> 00:23:01,588
Oh, my god, you're right.
532
00:23:01,671 --> 00:23:03,298
How did I not notice this?
533
00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:05,008
I'm magnificent!
534
00:23:05,550 --> 00:23:08,261
You fucked with the wrong guy.
535
00:23:08,678 --> 00:23:10,514
Ooh.
[Tucker moans]
536
00:23:10,597 --> 00:23:12,682
Oh, no! He's a grower!
537
00:23:12,766 --> 00:23:15,143
[squeals]
Finish him, boss! Rub him out!
538
00:23:15,227 --> 00:23:16,812
Thester, you're not helping!
539
00:23:16,895 --> 00:23:18,105
D-don't talk. I'm close.
540
00:23:20,607 --> 00:23:21,607
[Fitz groans]
541
00:23:23,110 --> 00:23:25,612
What? It's my day off.
I do what I want.
542
00:23:26,613 --> 00:23:28,115
[Gina yells]
543
00:23:28,198 --> 00:23:29,783
Tits and wings! Tits and wi...
544
00:23:30,158 --> 00:23:31,159
[Gina grunts]
545
00:23:32,452 --> 00:23:33,662
What the hell's all this?
546
00:23:33,745 --> 00:23:35,622
Huh? H-how'd that get there?
547
00:23:38,542 --> 00:23:39,709
Kevin, say something.
548
00:23:39,793 --> 00:23:42,003
[normal voice] Tits And Wings.
549
00:23:42,587 --> 00:23:43,797
[birds tweet]
550
00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:45,757
I love that bird sanctuary.
551
00:23:45,841 --> 00:23:47,509
Remind me to renew my annual pass.
552
00:23:47,592 --> 00:23:49,386
[sarcastically] Oh, great. He's back.
553
00:23:53,014 --> 00:23:54,516
Full-face mushroom stamp.
554
00:23:54,599 --> 00:23:55,892
- [Tucker grunts]
- [Fitz groans]
555
00:23:57,185 --> 00:23:58,520
[Tucker grunts, then screams]
556
00:23:59,771 --> 00:24:01,440
[Fitz chokes and stutters]
557
00:24:02,023 --> 00:24:03,525
I can't see!
558
00:24:03,608 --> 00:24:06,611
[laughs]
You weren't expecting a pig in a blanket.
559
00:24:06,695 --> 00:24:09,114
Time to dissolve this dick.
560
00:24:10,782 --> 00:24:12,033
He's too big!
561
00:24:12,117 --> 00:24:13,910
Thester, crank the AC.
562
00:24:18,790 --> 00:24:20,000
[he screams]
563
00:24:24,838 --> 00:24:26,423
[he screams]
564
00:24:26,506 --> 00:24:28,049
What a world!
565
00:24:31,845 --> 00:24:36,099
This has got to be the strangest
Martin Lawrence King day I've ever had.
566
00:24:41,104 --> 00:24:42,939
Sorry I mutated you, Kevin.
567
00:24:43,023 --> 00:24:44,983
I should've liked you the way you were:
568
00:24:45,066 --> 00:24:47,110
After one ram coma,
when you were Kev Man
569
00:24:47,194 --> 00:24:48,612
and you had a cool theme song.
570
00:24:48,695 --> 00:24:51,781
Thanks, brain, Dad, damage, umbrella.
571
00:24:51,865 --> 00:24:53,074
Hey, everyone, I'm back!
572
00:24:53,158 --> 00:24:54,158
And happy to say,
573
00:24:54,201 --> 00:24:57,120
I'm finally making the same
as all of you cocktarts.
574
00:24:57,204 --> 00:25:00,207
Because Chief lowered everyone else's pay
to match yours.
575
00:25:00,290 --> 00:25:01,500
Like I had a choice.
576
00:25:01,583 --> 00:25:06,129
Do you know how many hundreds of dollars
it takes to rebuild a Hooters? Two.
577
00:25:06,213 --> 00:25:09,299
Well, I'm glad you're back, Gina.
No one can replace you.
578
00:25:09,382 --> 00:25:11,551
Not like that stinker Tucker Carlson.
579
00:25:11,635 --> 00:25:14,846
[voiceover] Tonight, filling in
for an MIA Tucker Carlson,
580
00:25:14,930 --> 00:25:18,642
making his triumphant return
to Fox News, Bill O'Reilly.
581
00:25:18,725 --> 00:25:19,893
Not that asshole!
582
00:25:19,976 --> 00:25:21,478
My mask isn't on yet.
583
00:25:21,561 --> 00:25:23,563
- Fuck it, we'll do it live!
- [woman screams]
584
00:25:23,647 --> 00:25:24,898
We'll do it live!
585
00:25:25,398 --> 00:25:26,483
♪ Kev Man ♪
586
00:25:26,566 --> 00:25:29,319
♪ Rides two motorcycles at the same time ♪
587
00:25:29,402 --> 00:25:31,947
♪ Doesn't understand
a self-checkout line ♪
588
00:25:32,030 --> 00:25:34,616
♪ Attends funerals in cargo pants ♪
589
00:25:34,699 --> 00:25:37,410
♪ Impregnates women with a single glance ♪
590
00:25:37,494 --> 00:25:40,121
♪ Takes a dump
and doesn't wash his hands ♪
591
00:25:40,205 --> 00:25:44,125
♪ Doesn't clap when the plane la-a-ands ♪
592
00:25:44,209 --> 00:25:45,794
♪ Kev Man! ♪
593
00:26:00,100 --> 00:26:01,434
♪ Kev Man! ♪
594
00:26:07,232 --> 00:26:10,443
♪ Kev Ma-a-an! ♪