(MUSIC PLAYING)
(SNICKERS)
Fucking cool, huh?
Yeah.
Ah. All right. Now.
Now...
Tell me what you see. Yeah there's this...
There's like two pages right here...
In the Henry one. And it feels like, you know,
you don't see her face, but you see his asshole sticking out.
Subversion, subverting the form, subverting expectation. Oh, okay.
I get the connection. That's right.
Always subvert. Right.
Right?
So, so, um, look at this one.
Think that one's too much?
Pft! Man that's fucking bent.
This one reminds me of like my stuff.
I just feel like you're saying that because you love me.
Look, obviously you need to hear this,
because I don't think currently
you're able to think outside your own critical box.
You're already at a professional level of drawing for what you want to do.
You need to package this up, put it in an envelope
and send it off to Mad Magazine.
I'm serious.
College is a pinheaded proposition.
I... I don't know what to tell you, man.
I have to go to college. I can't not go to college.
And what happens if you come out ruined,
which is what's going to happen to you.
Not going is...
It's not an option. Okay. Fair enough.
No judgments here.
And I'm saying this against my own will.
Okay? Thank you.
These? Mmm-hmm.
Michael Jordan. Okay, 17 years old Michael Jordan.
These. These.
Kobe Bryant. But I'm asking which one?
Not Kobe Bryant.
Offensive.
Those are the figure drawings.
I'm only... everyone's required to include those.
Everything in your portfolio needs to be very clearly
coming from who you are.
Okay, well, I have to have those in there to show my capabilities.
It's about who you want to be.
Who you want to please.
You're asking me to tell you nice things about your work?
Do you... Do you draw for me?
You draw for Dad?
Who do you draw for?
I mean, you need some, some, some, figurative drawing
that's got a freaky-deaky look to match the cartoon stuff.
It's not like they have people like you coming in there.
I could draw it. Yeah.
Do you want me to draw you?
Do you want to draw me?
Yes.
All right, well...
Let's do it then.
To the nook.
What's the matter?
Uh, no. No.
Robert, what are you doing?
Uh...
I'm looking for charcoal. Charcoal? It's in the left pack.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.
Come on.
Robert it's not a facial portrait.
Broad strokes, broad strokes, capture the body.
Yeah, just take it in, man.
(CHUCKLING) I can't.
(LAUGHING) What? I know. I know, I know.
I know. You got it.
Bulbous tits, but with hair on 'em.
And you've got like a big belly with a with a distension.
What is that? Is it alien?
Alien eggs? Who knows?
This is fucking awesome man.
You'll probably make it beautiful.
That's my point.
What are you looking for?
No, I just lost track of time.
My alarm. Your what?
An alarm. I set an alarm... I have to...
What are you doing?
Come on, let's finish the drawing. I can't finish the drawing.
I got to get out. Then go to the garage?
And this is much more important than work, Robert.
No, this is actually very important.
Rob. Okay, just wait. I gotta get there fast.
All right. Thanks. Bye.
See you on Monday.
(DJ SPEAKING ON RADIO)
(CAR HONKS)
Robert.
(CAR HONKS)
Hey.
Oh. Hey.
I wanted to make sure everything was okay, man.
I mean, did I freak you out at all back there?
No, no, no. It's fine.
It's... It's cool. It's great.
I mean, people on the outside might not understand,
but you know that I was just,
I was just trying to teach you something right?
No. I get it. It's cool.
Are you sure?
Yeah. We're good.
All right. Well, then get in the car.
I'll give you a lift to work.
Katano, I appreciate it, but um, I really like this, this walk.
Helps clear my mind for work.
It's fucking freezing outside, man.
Just get in the car. I'll drive you.
It's not a problem.
It's a five... it's a five minute walk.
It's no big deal.
Now you're making me feel weird.
All right. So if there's a problem, we can talk about it.
If it's not a problem, you don't have to talk about it.
But would you please just get in...
(CAR HONKS)
(CRASHES)
You okay?
Katano?
MAN 1: He was such a funny guy... You going to say anything?
A loving person He had a heart of gold. One of the funniest guys
I ever knew in my life.
MAN 2: He once told me after a mutual friend died,
that he wasn't afraid of death.
Enter life, trying to define it.
And exit back into the abstract.
WOMAN 1: I know this is a lot right now,
and I know you were close to him.
I just want you to know if there's
anything you want to talk about,
I'm here. I never got the sense
that he got a lot of respect from the rest of the faculty,
and I know for a fact he didn't like you very much.
So...
Mmm-hmm. I'm not trying to call you out but,
I'm just saying.
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
Shh. Shh! (METAL SCRAPING)
Easy.
You gotta let it down smooth, all right?
So just art and meaningful stuff, okay?
MILES: I'm scared.
ROBERT: Don't be scared. It's just gonna be two minutes.
(GLASS BREAKING)
Anything you leave behind is gonna get tossed,
just remember that. Okay?
MILES: (WHISPERING) Robert. ROBERT: (WHISPERING) What?
MILES: It's been five minutes.
ROBERT: Relax, it's fine.
MILES: You said two minutes.
You promised. Two minutes.
(LAUGHING)
Holy shit. What?
Miles, look. That's you.
MILES: Great. Put it in the bag. We'll look at them later.
Let's go.
Miles, wait. This stuff's incredible.
Fuck.
(KNOCKING ON DOOR) MAN: Who's in there?
(POLICE SIRENS WAILING)
Everything's going to be fine, okay?
It might be a little bit scary when you get in there,
but you just be calm and polite
and leave the rest to me. Cheryl.
Okay? Just a second Ryan. Cheryl.
Cheryl, I gotta talk to you.
Cheryl I gotta finish telling you
my goddamn fucking story. Please don't use that language.
This kid is going home.
CHERYL: Yes. Hopefully, he will be going home, and hopefully
you will be going home as well. RYAN: Yeah I got a fucking mile-long record.
He has none. Don't worry about anything. I got this covered.
I know the judge. I'll get this done in two minutes.
Cheryl, you gotta get me the fuck out of here.
Cheryl Quartermaine. I'm legal aid.
Oh, I'm sorry. We don't...
There must be some misunderstanding.
Robert has counsel.
Well, I've actually decided to work with Cheryl.
CHERYL: Your Honor, this wasn't a burglary case.
It's just the measly cost of a broken window.
My client wanted personal art of sentimental value
of his teacher, who had no family anyway.
The true issue here is a grieving kid
who just lost his teacher.
Your Honor, we've investigated the facts and the circumstances.
It's obvious this is a victimless crime,
considering both the relationship and the belongings.
Therefore, the state moves
to dismiss the case. JUDGE: Motion granted,
case dismissed.
Well, that was easy.
Thank you so much. I really appreciate this,
I have to say,
I admire your independence.
(CELL PHONE VIBRATING)
Well, your father is here now,
so maybe you'll say something to him.
(COUGHING)
You okay?
I'm fine.
I didn't get you anything. It's okay.
You know Peter's a good friend, right?
Mmm-hmm.
You know, he took the morning off so that he could help you?
You know he has a big job?
So what I think would be terrific
is if you could send him a note that you write,
and just thank him for his time and apologize.
You see, the thing is, I didn't ask him to help me.
You did.
Clearly, I didn't need his help.
So maybe you should write him an apology.
Get him a, I don't know, give him a fruit basket.
He'd like that. Fruit basket?
I've had a lot of time to think.
Especially last night.
Really, you know, cemented it into my mind.
And I made the decision I'm not gonna go back to school after winter break.
Oh, you have?
You had a cemented thought,
and then you're... that's your conclusion?
Do you want to explain that any further?
(MOUTH FULL) I can't really explain it.
Why am I not surprised?
If you want to take time off after you graduate, then that's an option.
But you need to get your diploma.
So come January, you're going to show up on time.
You're going to smile.
You're going to look interested.
You can get straight D's for all we care, but you're gonna pass.
Or I could just get my GED and never suffer again.
I don't understand how that works.
ROBERT: You don't under-- You know, that's the stupidest idea I've ever heard.
Right there. Right there. ROBERT: Uh-huh?
You know... you know what you get with it?
You know what you get with the GED?
You know what kind of job you would get?
What? Gas station.
I'd love to work in a gas station.
Would you like to work in the dishwasher?
Yeah. You want to work back there?
There's no reason to be so condescending
towards people who work those kinds of jobs.
JENNIFER: He's not being condescending.
You can't get a job as a dishwasher.
Do you know what time they wake up in the morning?
5 A.M. 4:45 probably.
It doesn't matter anyway.
How is that going to look on your application?
I don't give a shit.
Art schools don't give a shit, okay?
They only care about the portfolio.
Besides, I might not even go to college anyway.
What?
(MOUTH FULL) Yeah.
Can you get any more food in your mouth?
Huh?
All my heroes didn't go to college.
Great.
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING) I'll take anything you don't want.
Well, you're going to be taking a lot.
I think I can handle it.
All right. Okay.
Ah, nice. Great.
So, archive this one, this one.
That one. That one. That one.
Be gentle. Don't...
Don't rip it.
Woah, why are you so close?
MILES: What's your problem? You always do this, you get really close.
I'm just excited. Calm down, Rob.
I'm just saying... Are those Cartoon Quarterly's?
Yeah. You want one?
Yeah. Let me see. All right. You can have one.
There's only 25 copies, so be careful.
This from freshman year?
Yeah.
Found yours. What?
(CHUCKLES)
No, I was doing this lame stick figure-y thing.
MILES: It's pretty good. What's your problem?
Yeah, only in the context of high school.
Once there's no school, its complete shit. It sucks.
You need to be harder on yourself, Miles.
If you want to get someplace, you gotta you gotta be harder on yourself.
Any other Katano stuff?
Here, you can take these.
I don't want to be responsible for them anymore.
Our letters from the future?
He gave these to you?
I kinda want to open mine.
What? No. What do you mean you kind of want to open...
You can't open it for 20 years.
These are all our parents' addresses.
I hope nobody moves in 20 years.
I hope there's a postal service in 20 years.
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
I can hang out if you stick around till last period.
Thanks. But I'll pass.
See ya.
GEORGE: Four damage to target player.
Take that. MAN 4: I'll take it.
(VOCALIZING)
GEORGE: I'm kind of struggling here.
Why don't I play a little lightning helix?
Boom!
MAN 4: You can't target that... Shut up!
You don't know what the fuck you're talking about.
You think you're a fucking know it all.
Hey, did I sell you these? GEORGE: I can do that with a lightning helix and...
No, my uncle passed all that superhero crap down to me.
Never even read 'em.
I could do like five for the Marvel and Image stuff.
Great.
Why are you selling this stuff anyways?
Freaking garbage.
You know, I'm looking at a place in Trenton later, and...
I need a car, so. Whoa.
Trenton?
I know. It gets a little bit scary there, you know?
I'm just trying to get out of here.
I have no use for these Archie Comics.
Oh, shit. I totally forgot those were in here.
I'm not getting rid of this.
You got any Betty and Veronicas?
No.
We have some later Jugheads if you're interested.
Sorry, but no.
How much total? I can give you,
like 50 bucks for what I could sell these for.
But if you work some extra shifts during the weekends,
and on the holidays,
I'll give you the car.
What? The Cucaracha?
Yeah, I'm not giving you my mom's car.
Wow.
Wow. Thank you.
That fucking... And it's still running? It's...
I hope so.
(CHUCKLES)
Your problem now.
(TEETH CHATTERING)
RADIO ANNOUNCER: Welcome to Music to Spazz By, with Dave the Spazz,
our listeners' WFMU storage.
If you'd like to set your watch,
the correct Music to Spazz By time is exactly...
Half past the monkey's ass.
(RADIO ANNOUNCER LAUGHING)
Buddy. (KNOCKS ROOF OF CAR)
Yeah?
Your car is smoking.
Thanks, man.
Thank you.
(RETRO RADIO STATION PLAYING)
Are you Robert?
Hi, yeah!
You said you'd be here in the afternoon.
It's very hard to get here. I'm sorry.
It's after dusk. I know.
I'll give you the basics of everything.
I'll walk you through.
I have a couple of thumb rules here.
See that door?
Past midnight, locked up tight.
Okay.
This is our living room.
That's the couch there.
We have a couch.
That's the bathroom.
See that? You have a bathroom.
And, um, this is the TV.
You can watch that.
(SNICKERS)
It's great.
Oh, Jesus.
Oh, my God. This painting's incredible.
Let me show you the kitchen.
This room is mine.
You don't need to see it.
Goodbye for a moment.
Cool man. Yeah.
Hi, there. Hey.
Sorry.
Is there another bedroom?
Here's the kitchen.
I know those boxes may be kind of a fire hazard.
Oh no, it's cool. It's totally cool.
Okay, Mister Robert, there's something that I have to be up front about.
No one can know that you lived here.
Okay.
So you'll just have to be rather discreet.
Yeah, sure. Understood.
Now, now that that's settled, please tell me your concerns.
I mean, it just feels like the air's a little, um...
It's a little... It's a little... Warm.
It's too hot for you?
Yeah, it's boiling hot.
Okay, I'll, I'll shut it down for a moment.
Thank you.
(CHUCKLES)
Legally, we have to keep the... keep it up at all times,
but we like to cool it down once a week.
Yeah, and where would I be staying?
Steven's room.
Oh, he's leaving. No, he's staying.
I'd be given half the room?
Yes, about.
But it's not really for me to say,
How much for the room? 350.
Okay. And is there any way I could stay tonight?
You want to stay here tonight?
Yeah. I mean, if it's possible.
It'd be greatly appreciated. Um...
I guess it's okay.
Wow. We have a spare mattress.
Awesome. Cool. By the way, I was I was wondering.
I don't... Is there a fish in here?
I didn't see any fish. Um... Oh.
He was eaten by another fish.
And where is he?
I don't know. Okay.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
Okay, down there is the DA's office.
He's the guy who wanted to put you behind bars.
Just kidding, Robert.
Here is Steven's office.
He kind of runs the show. (DOOR SLAMS)
Yeah, that happens.
He's usually in Trenton. And...
Back there is paralegal.
Hmm. Kind of a dump huh?
No, no, no, it's awesome.
Oh God, you're cute.
And last but not least,
this is me. Nice.
Now just drop your coat anywhere,
and make yourself at home. Okay.
Robert. (CLEARS THROAT) I have got to say,
this just...
(CHUCKLES) It just absolutely tickled me.
(LAUGHS)
Yeah?
(CHERYL CONTINUES LAUGHING)
I'm glad. Yeah.
(SIGHS) Oh, my God.
So tell me something about yourself.
Uh, well, I've recently left school.
Um, and I'm supporting myself for the first time.
And I'm looking for new opportunities.
I have an idea.
Yeah. I want to call in one of my coworkers,
and I just want you to draw him.
Can you do that for me?
Sure. Yeah, I can do that. Okay, hold on.
Jared, could you come to my office, please?
Okay.
Here. Don't let him see you do it and make it mean.
Yes. What do you want? Um, I'm curious,
did we ever get the discovery from the Judkins case?
Don't you remember? I told you like two hours ago
that she called and everything is going to be set up
for tomorrow morning's meeting?
Right. That's right. Excellent. Thank you.
Is Roberta in? Uh,
Roberta had to step out to the drugstore
to buy her mother some perfume and different kind of lotions
because she's having a skin problem now.
But she'll be back in a few minutes.
Okay. Can you tell her to come in?
Um, I can, if you really want me to.
Thank you so much.
But I'm not happy doing that. Pardon me?
I'm not really happy doing that.
I didn't ask you if you were happy doing it.
But if you could do it, it would be fabulous.
Okay, I will do it for you.
Yes. Thank you so much.
Bye. Bye.
Hand it over.
(CHERYL EXCLAIMS)
(CHORTLES)
(LAUGHING) Oh, my god.
(SNORTS)
Okay. You are truly delicious.
(WATER SPLASHING)
CHERYL: Your responsibility is very simple.
People are going to come in and they're going to talk.
So your job is to distill the essence of what they're trying to say.
into the fewest possible words. Right.
So that I have clear notes when I review it later on, you understand?
Yes. So,
for example, in your case, in your case, you were accused
of breaking and entering, right? Mmm-hmm.
But you said to me, It wasn't really burglary
because I was taking back what was rightfully mine.
Yeah. So, you would write down...
Uh, so, believes... "Believes," good.
"He was taking back," good.
"His own property."
"Property." "Property." Perfect.
Right. It's easy.
Hi, Wallace. It's so good to see you.
What's happening?
Uh, so, uh, Robert, meet our friend Wallace.
This is Robert.
He will be sitting in taking some notes.
what's happening?
CHERYL: So, Wallace.
It's so nice to see you again.
How are you feeling today?
What do you mean?
In whatever way.
Um, uh...
You know what? Don't worry about it. Okay.
Uh, in regard to your outburst at Rite Aid Pharmacy,
I think that you will want to plead guilty to that charge.
I think that's our best bet.
Listen.
I'd imagine you get a lot of maniacs in here.
But this is a very specific, unique case.
And I can assure are you that you are in good hands.
I approach all my cases with the same care.
Frankly, I'd be better off defending myself out there,
because after my last experience with this, I'm not in the market
for another simple jackass with an agenda.
Robert, honey, you don't need to be writing this part down.
I bet this wouldn't be just another case if I was paying you.
I refuse to go to court if this is my only option.
Well, not showing up for your court date
will ensure you time in jail, which is not an option.
Right, Wallace? Please don't make this difficult.
It is my job to believe you.
(LAUGHS)
Miles, you're so fucking disgusting.
What?
I don't know. You're just chewing really loud
and you got grease all over your fingers.
No wonder you skin looks like hell.
Pork rinds make it worse?
Yeah of course.
They did a study a little while ago, at Harvard.
They studied pork rinds at Harvard?
Yeah. Dr Frankensladder. You ever heard of him?
Well, basically, he came to the conclusion
that acne is an unconscious refusal to mature into adulthood.
What are you talking about?
Bad skin is one way to ensure absolutely no one in the world
expects you to act like a grown-up.
I'm not gonna stop eating pork rinds.
These things are good.
Wow. This is it?
Yeah.
It's incredible.
Yeah, it's cool.
Yeah.
This is the best.
Just shut that door.
I can't wait.
I'm going to take the train here every weekend.
We're going to stay up all night drawing.
We're going to have such a great time. All right, all right, Miles.
Please, just cool your jets. Don't embarrass me.
Okay.
Hey, Barry.
Hello.
Slam it tight.
(RADIATOR CLICKING)
(MAN SPEAKING ON TV)
(GRUNTING)
MAN: (ON TV) This is a sponge fisherman, a special breed of man...
Special breed of man.
Oh, sorry. Wrong room.
Sit right down.
Sit down. Right here?
(TV CONTINUES PLAYING)
What? You started without me?
What are you watching? Beneath a 12-Mile Reef.
With Richard Boone and Robert Wagner,
on glorious Cinemascope.
He's very handsome.
You think so?
Did you ever hear of Richard Boone?
Nah.
He later played Paladin on TV, and once he was a guest
on The Joe Franklin Show.
Did you ever hear of The Joe Franklin Show?
Well, that was before your time.
But he was a big talk show host in New York for many, many years.
He was great.
You like adventure movies?
Oh, I love them. I love them all.
You know, Gulliver's Travels? The Dave Fleischer. Oh yes.
Oh sure I do. His brother Max. It was his studio.
full length animated feature in 1939.
Mmm-hmm. Yeah, that's great.
And I love the character of Gabby.
Remember him? The comedic character?
Yeah. He was great.
Hey.
What are you guys doing in here?
We're watching movies.
A friend of mine puts them on discs for me in exchange for things.
Cool.
(EXHALES)
Do you have any sodas?
Comics.
Oh, boy.
We have fans of the funnies, Steven.
Did you hear me?
Robert likes funny books, Steven.
Dick Tracy? Dick Tracy rules.
Blondie.
Yeah.
STEVEN: Batman and Robin. ROBERT: Yeah.
Dennis The Evil Menace with a slingshot. (CHUCKLES)
(LAUGHS) You like Archie and Jughead?
I was in the Archie Fan club.
What, really? BARRY: Mmm-hmm.
STEVEN: One Big Happy.
You guys sure like comics.
Doonesbury.
What's that one?
ROBERT: Wait, what. Steven.
Okay. Could you be careful with that one?
It's a rarity, isn't it?
Tijuana Bibles? Yeah.
This, this anonymous cartoonist did 'em, like a long time ago.
But they're so fucking dirty.
They're just really insane and vulgar. Um...
But, yeah, they're really... they're really rare.
You can find them if you're looking for em usually.
STEVEN: This is disgusting.
They're like 20, 30, sometimes higher.
It's a bit much isn't it?
Well, it's supply and demand.
There should be more actually.
But most people don't really care about that stuff.
That one's actually our old art teacher's.
Your teacher's? He was into subversive stuff.
That one had a lot of subversion.
Subversion.
Yeah.
I like that, Barry. Reminds me of The Munsters
where Paul Lynde went to the house
and they served him water in their best china, and he took a sip
and at the bottom of the glass was a giant widow spider.
(CHUCKLES)
Oh boy.
ROBERT: What's this comic called?
CLERK: Oh, it's some crappy, you know,
funny animal anthology, mess of reprints.
You know.
Pay wasn't good. Nobody took it seriously.
People batted the shit out overnight.
ROBERT: Sounds like it's good. Like look at this.
What is this red void he's floating on?
And why is his... Why is his chin cut off? (ROBERT LAUGHING)
Like a perfectly flat... What is that line a cut off for?
It's just a mess on every level.
It's like so they wouldn't even print these things right.
Half the time, it's like they have the colors spilling out
on the wrong sides of the lines and crap. They don't look that bad.
I mean, they don't look sloppy.
I love it, man. I think it's loose.
You know what I mean?
It's like Warhol. I brought my new Afrobot.
Nice.
I'm really proud of it.
Yeah, you want a critique?
Sure.
Afrobot and Segar's Treasure.
Like E.C. Segar. Artist to Popeye, you know?
(CHUCKLES)
What's funny?
I don't know, Miles.
Your linework's like really ratty.
That's just my style. But crude isn't a style.
I'm... I'm sorry.
I just want to help you.
I mean, this is the fifth one, right? Mmm-hmm.
I don't... I really... It's not for me.
I'm sorry. It's not for me.
The poor guy.
You've got to put him down.
He's like flailing around in a coma.
Just pull the plug. Robert.
Besides, nobody buys the mini-comics as it is.
Yo, move, move!
Yo, move.
I think I deserve a second opinion.
All right.
Hey, everybody.
Who wants to win a free comic book?
No, I'm okay. Nobody.
George. George.
If you give this a review, you get to keep it.
Just don't mince words.
They have a price, it says one measly buck.
Did you really draw this?
It looks like Tales from Beanworld to me.
The eyes look like Beanworld.
The Sprout-Butts, it's...
I'm sure he's just stealing from it subconsciously.
Yeah, I think he stole it.
I've never read Tales from the Beanworld.
I bet you have. Kinda reminds me
when Gran'Ma'Pa threw that fabulous Look See Show for all the beans.
Ring a bell?
Does that ring a bell?
Ding ding!
I think the Sprout-Butts
in Beanworld, they... they look more like little beads.
(LAUGHS) Oh my God, you have read it.
You're a cheater.
Pulling from Beanworld for inspo.
You're allowed to have diverse influences as a cartoonist, Robert.
You have the most obvious egghead taste in everything.
You have asshole taste.
You love the taste of asshole.
Taste of asshole?
Miles is making strides.
I'll buy five for the mini comics shelf.
Great. I only made five.
Can I owe you for those? Sure.
Oh. That's Neal Adams.
Grip that shit. Top shelf. Oh, cool.
Except Joe's idea of top-shelf was trash like McFarlane's early Spawn run.
Don't be a dickhead.
This shit's meant to be fun.
That's, that's why they call them the funnies.
They don't call them the funnies for no reason.
This is what you got?
Mmm-hmm.
(EXHALES)
You're not threatened by me or something,
now that I'm drawing cartoonier looking comics?
Miles, if I'm being honest, I think they show promise.
But... I asked you a question.
No, I'm certainly not threatened by you drawing like me.
Yeah, I'm flattered. But if Katano were alive,
he'd call it a hodge. A half-assed job.
Because it is.
I didn't want to tell you, but Katano helped me with the story line.
He actually loved it.
So he said I'd turned on my lights for this one.
Okay. Great.
Then why are you showing it to me?
You haven't seen this.
I've been working on it a long time.
Well, maybe don't mention his opinion.
if you're going to ask my advice.
Because I don't think he was always honest with us.
Honestly.
That's $4.50.
That's including the friendly discount?
Well, there's a friendly tax.
How long are you going to be?
Just a minute. Oh, you're working for Cheryl, right?
Yeah. Sometimes.
You think she's good looking?
Uh, she's really nice. She's a really kind person.
She's also a dishonest person too.
You turn your back, she'll talk behind your back.
Um, I'm just gonna be a minute.
Before that, I was fixing computers.
And who were you fixing computers for?
For people whose computers were broken?
Okay.
And after that, you worked for a company called Image.
Years ago. Wait, Image Comics?
It says here that you were a creative supervisor of some sort.
That's just a fancy way of saying I was a color separator.
It's like an assistant to the colorist,
but more assembly line.
I wasn't an artist. Nobody get all excited.
And what ended your position
as an assistant colorist there?
Isn't that in your notes?
Yeah. No, it's, it's just mentioned briefly,
but I would, I would love to hear it from you,
since that was the position that you had the longest
and had the most responsibilities.
Because you're talking about a 10-year-old incident.
It's completely irrelevant,
and inappropriate to bring into this. Wallace...
It's... It's obviously all in front of you.
You don't need to hear anything about it from me.
I understand why it would seem that way,
but it is better for me.
I can build a better case for you
if I understand... Let's close this subject.
Yo, Joe.
Yeah. Where are those old Image back issues I sold you?
Hell of a constitution you have.
Yeah, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yuck it up.
Could you move?
What? Move.
No! Go.
JOE: You're not getting a discount on those.
Come on, now. Those aren't yours anymore.
Hey, man.
Sorry to bother you.
I just can't believe you worked at Image.
It's definitely, uh, really big, early, you know, an inspiration for me.
Inspiration to what?
Become a typist?
(LAUGHS)
No, no, I'm actually... My main thing is I, uh...
Draw.
Okay, well, again, I was assistant to a colorist.
Color separator, I had no creative input in the product you read.
(DOOR SLAMS)
(WHISPERS) Wow!
MAN: I had to go to the bathroom bad,
and everything's closed down, you know?
So, I got a cup, I went in the bathroom,
and I took a hot piss in the car.
Right?
And then a woman must have saw me, called the police.
They opened up the doors, they grabbed me,
he punches me in my face, throws me against the cop car.
She's making me plead guilty against my will.
Boy, you guys--
I just... I wanted to say that I think your mark on those Image books is,
like way more distinctive than you think.
What does that mean?
It feels like it doesn't...
mean anything, but it... You speak very well.
Very good. Um...
Just that it does. It's art, and it has impact
and meaning and-- Impact.
Well, like think of how many people read the books that you worked on.
You separated those colors, you know, that's a big deal.
I know. He's a professional.
I don't know. This is really crazy for me.
I've just never met a professional cartoonist before.
And I really think that your separating style is really its own unique thing.
I just, I have to show you.
I have to show you like, like...
(ROBERT EXHALES)
Like here, the way the neon colors bleed over the lines.
You only really get that in older printing,
And it's kind of-- That's what I worked on?
Um, I think. Is it?
Maybe it's not-- Boy, you did beautiful work
Doin' that stuff. Why'd you have this?
Um... Weirdly, I've just been re-reading them.
But what were you going for them with that style? It's--
You're making him upset.
I was going for my survival.
I'm in the middle of legal counseling here.
Right. Yeah. I'm so sorry.
ROBERT: Sorry. Some crazy kid.
What the hell's wrong with him?
With a guy like that, you gotta calm down.
Forget about him.
Hey kid.
Well, I guess I'm off to my hour long bus ride back home.
Hey, break a leg at the trial.
Even though I live 40 minutes away in Trenton and the bus route is absurd.
I live over by the Trenton Monument. Do you, uh, you want a lift?
Okay. Cool.
ROBERT: I'm trying to find WFMU.
Also for the record, I didn't sweet talk you into driving me home.
Okay. I'm just saying that so it doesn't seem like
I'm ungrateful for something I didn't specifically ask for.
Sweet.
It's on Hermitage Avenue, just stay on Hermitage Avenue.
There's a mall on Hermitage, it's coming up.
I have to pick up a prescription.
Hmm.
I'm not telling you what the prescription is, if that's what you're--
No, Sorry. No, that's--
(EXCLAIMS) You just missed it.
You just missed it.
Oh shit. I'm sorry.
You know what? Do you want to actually go to Burger King? I'm hungry.
Maybe we could just talk shop there.
I need to pick up something for my well-being.
Should I make a U? What do you think?
Really.
Now you roll down the window, roll down the window.
I need some fucking air.
Roll-- Oh my God. I don't know why it doesn't work.
Would you just sit for a second?
(EXHALES)
What do you think?
Do you uh... Do you recognize her?
(ROBERT SIGHS)
Are you gonna get your prescription?
I actually need you to talk to this guy for me in there first.
Okay? He's a pharmacist.
You're going to talk to him for me
and I'm gonna wait here while you do it.
(SIREN BLARING)
This is the...
Is this, this is--
Despite whatever propaganda Cheryl has drilled into your head,
he pushed me first. Okay?
Okay.
Richard is a very,
very sick man with very twisted ideas about how a pharmacy operates.
I know for a fact!
I'm sorry. I didn't realize he was the one who started it.
He's unhinged, very violent.
And all it would take is for you to fuck with him a little
to push him over the edge.
All I'm asking is for you to fuck with him a little and then fire.
You want me to fuck with him? Provoke him!
I just want it on record
that I'm not the only one he does this to and that it was him.
Not me. You're gonna see he's gonna get riled up very fast.
Okay? What do you mean, what's he gonna do? (LAUGHS)
You'll see, He's probably gonna put his hands on you.
His hands on me? He's like...
Okay, but if he's, like, really unhinged, couldn't it get ugly?
Couldn't get really-- No, no, I'll jump in when it gets bad.
Okay?
I promise. And, and, and, I'm not even allowed in there.
That's how much I'm willing to go to the wall with this.
I just want the same from you.
You're sure he's in there?
Very sure.
He's definitely in there? Fuck it.
You don't have to care about me. No, no, no, no.
Just drop me off at the bus stop.
Fuck it. Go fuck yourself. No, no, no, no, no, wait.
I'll do it. Great.
Now just get him upset,
so he does something incriminating for me and we can get it on tape.
You could say...
You could say you're a junior pharmacist,
from, from, a Walgreens.
In Princeton.
You got all that?
Yeah. Okay. All right. Yeah.
(DOOR CLOSES)
Excuse me.
(DOOR CLOSES)
CASHIER: Anything else?
(TOY MUSIC PLAYS)
CASHIER: Are you okay?
(CHUCKLING SOFTLY)
(JINGLE BELLS PLAYING SOFTLY)
Are you okay? Mmm.
CASHIER: Richard?
RICHARD: Yeah? CASHIER: Can you get this from the back?
RICHARD: Yeah.
CASHIER: How are you?
WOMAN: What are you doing here?
I just... I'm checking out the pharmacy here.
I'm a junior pharmacist in Princeton.
Could you get me a Percocet?
Percocet?
Please, just get me a Percocet.
I'd do anything, literally.
I'm sorry. What do you mean? You need that right now?
Well, aren't you the pharmacist?
Yeah. I can't prescribe stuff like that.
I'm still junior pharmacist.
What on earth is a junior pharmacist?
I have no power at all.
I have, like, no access to that medication.
I can't prescribe it to anybody.
So you say. No, really.
I'm like a, I don't know. I'm like a doorman or something.
Doormen have lots of power.
They have door power.
Don't you get your medication here?
Get me a Percocet you schmuck!
(BEEPING)
(WHISPERS) You told me to do something I don't know--
(MOUTHING)
Do you know him?
He's horrible.
He's a horrible man.
WALLACE: (WHISPERING) Don't look at me. Do it. Do it. (MOUTHING)
No, no, I don't know-- Do you sell DVDs?
I don't work here.
What the fuck are you doing here?
I was going to get him...
One of these, actually, because he's actually not doing so well.
Is that like a pig for Christmas?
(SIGHS)
CASHIER: Richard? RICHARD: Yeah?
CASHIER: Simchowitz? MAN 6: Yep.
All right. Nice meeting you.
Ow. Fuck!
CASHIER: Oh my God.
RICHARD: Ow! Ow! Ow!
RICHARD: Let go of me!
CASHIER: Oh my God. Are you okay?
RICHARD: He throw a horsey. Fuck.
Wallace--
The idea was to provoke... I was 100 percent entirely trying to do what I thought
you would do in there. I don't want to talk about it.
(SIREN WAILING)
I'm gonna help you, Wallace.
Just so you know, when you're tucked in your warm bed tonight
that I'll be sleeping in a rat's ass!
I live in a shithole apartment in Trenton.
It's a total shithole, Wallace.
(DOGS BARKING) (KEYS JINGLING)
Wallace. Wait one second.
Please. Just talk to me.
What would it take for a drawing lesson?
Honestly, you consider yourself a cartoonist, right?
I'd pay you.
How much?
Two hundred? Three?
Show it to me.
I mean, I don't... I don't have it on me.
But how about you come over tomorrow?
Christmas!
You want me to go to a child's apartment on the worst day of the year?
My parents make these chocolate chip pancakes at their place in Princeton.
What part?
There in sort of the middle class part.
There is no middle class part.
Go.
Have the money and the food ready to go.
Five Oldfield Lane. Like "old field."
(KEYS JINGLING)
(SIREN WAILING)
(LOUD RETRO MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)
Barry, can you turn the music down?
(BARRY GROANS) Barry, are you okay?
(LOUD MUSIC CONTINUES)
Barry!
(FLESH SLAPPING)
Oh!
(MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING)
(FISH FLOPPING)
(GASPS)
(ENGINE SPUTTERING)
(ENGINE REVVING)
(ENGINE SPUTTERING)
ROBERT: Fuck.
(ENGINE CONTINUES SPUTTERING)
Fuck!
Fuck! Fuck!
(ENGINE SPUTTERING)
LEWIS: Hey.
LEWIS: Merry Christmas.
Your bed's made.
(AMUSING INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)
(SNICKERS)
Merry Christmas.
Did you come here to get your presents?
I came for the pancakes.
Hmm. Presents, too.
Merry Christmas.
Oh, it's the Neat Stuff Anthology.
Yeah, I know you like Peter Bagge,
and that's supposed to be a really good collection.
Well, exactly. It's a collection,
and I have all the original Issues. No, that just came out.
What I'm saying is it's a reprint of what I already have. So...
I, I have the issues, and I mean, it's a very attractive collection.
You know what? These are actually really nicely bound.
I think I'm going to keep them, you know, for backup.
Okay. So... thanks.
(DOORBELL RINGING)
Who is that?
Oh yeah, that's my friend, Wallace.
I forgot to tell you. I invited him.
You forgot? Well, it slipped my mind.
God damn it! I'm gonna grab the door.
Do you know who Wallace is?
No, I don't know Wallace.
Hey. Hey.
It's very confusing.
You have two front doors, so I I just went for the fancier one.
Yeah, no, everybody gets that mixed up.
Here. Let me get your coat.
Hey, everybody, this is Wallace. Hi there, Wallace.
I'm Lewis, Robert's father.
What's happening?
I feel overdressed.
Oh, no, no shoes on the carpet.
Mom, Mom, it's fine. All right. You can wear your shoes.
It's fine. (STAMMERS) It...
It's literally the only rule that we have in the house.
I just wasn't...
...thinking I would take off my shoes.
LEWIS: Where do you live, Wallace?
Uh, Trenton. LEWIS: Oh, is that where you're from?
Yeah. I'm from Trenton.
You still have family there? This isn't a job interview, Dad.
(WHISPERS) Don't ask him about that.
My parents are there as far as I know, but I don't speak to them.
I'm not a big fan of my family.
Totally understand.
I mean, I live in a house with a son and we... he barely speaks to me.
Actually, we don't live in the same house anymore, so...
I guess he moved out.
How do you two know each other?
We work together. At the garage.
No, Dad, I I got a new job.
Working for a lawyer. So...
What lawyer? Cheryl.
Her name is Cheryl. You guys met.
So let me get this straight.
The lawyer who was given to you for free is now the lawyer that you work for.
Well you say I don't tell you anything about my life,
and when I tell you, you're immediately judgmental.
Nobody's being judgmental here.
I'm just saying, you know, I like this job.
Well, Wallace, now that we have you here,
maybe you could answer some questions about Robert's life.
All right. Maybe this is why Wallace doesn't talk to his own family.
That's not actually why.
I'd like to know more about this job.
But I think it's great that it's something that you really like.
Is it great, Lewis?
I'm sorry, Wallace.
It's nothing personal. I know that...
You work for Cheryl also. Technically, she works for me.
Uh... What's your case about?
I think Wallace is here for some pancakes and not to be interrogated.
I'm not interrogating you, Wallace, am I?
GRANDPA: Jennifer.
Uh...
JENNIFER: Robert.
What? Go help your grandfather with his TV.
He's gonna figure it out on his own.
Go. Okay.
So Wallace, why don't you tell us about your case?
Are you familiar with the Rite Aid on Hermitage Avenue?
No.
Well you're lucky.
Why, what happened?
It's just a violent atmosphere.
Very poorly managed.
So what actually happened?
Excuse me?
Look. At the top corner... Okay. It's resetting.
What does that mean? Okay.
HDMI 2. HDMI 2, HDMI 1,
I didn't know which one it was. What were you watching?
Was C-SPAN.
C-SPAN? Yeah.
MAN: (ON TV) ...lives up to the commitment
that he made to me in my... I think that's it.
ROBERT: Cool, here. Okay. Come watch with me.
Not now. Come on. Be a nice boy.
MAN: (ON TV) That was specifically about this issue.
(INDISTINCT MURMURING)
(JENNIFER WHISPERING) LEWIS: I don't know. I don't--
Why are you asking me that? I don't understand why--
Where's Wallace?
I believe he's pretending to use the bathroom.
(SIGHS)
(WATER RUNNING)
(KNOCKS ON DOOR)
WALLACE: There's someone in here.
Wallace. It's me.
WALLACE: Can I have some fucking privacy?
Wallace, I'm alone. Do you want to let me in?
Get in here.
(WALLACE PANTING)
(SCREAMS) What is this?
Why the fuck did you invite me here?
Look, I don't, I don't know you. Okay? I don't...
...know you or what you're capable of.
This is a business transaction.
Money is exchanging hands.
Look, I'm sorry if you're uncomfortable.
Yes, it's uncomfortable!
I need... (GASPING) I need air.
(PANTING) Air. I need air.
Okay. I can open the window.
Just back up! Back the fuck up!
What the fuck?
LEWIS: What's going on? Hello?
(BANGING ON DOOR)
LEWIS: What's going on in there?
LEWIS: Open the door.
Don't come in. Don't come in. I'm making.
LEWIS: Robert open the door!
Dad, everything's fine. LEWIS: (SCREAMING) Robert, open the door now!
What the hell's going on in here?
What? What are you? What are you doing locking my kid in the bathroom?
He's not locking me in the bathroom.
What are you doing?
Are you... Are you funny?
Are you funny? No, sir. Not at all, sir.
What does that mean? No, I don't I don't mean, I don't know how to say it.
What...
What's this? That was me.
I did that. You did that.
For air. He was... He couldn't breathe.
And I opened it and the windows were stuck.
What do you mean he couldn't breathe?
What's going on? Do you have asthma?
No. Are you sick?
What? What?
Why? What is going on? He couldn't breathe.
He's a guest, and I was... He couldn't breathe so I opened the windows for him.
Well, did you unlock the lock?
Did you think of doing that? Yes.
It's stuck from when they were painted.
Asshole. So are you going to blame the painters?
Is that what this is about? No, I'm not blaming the painters, I'm trying
to explain my situation. 'Cause it's always someone else's fault.
It's always someone else's fault.
It's just an observation.
Can you two gentlemen get the fuck out now?
Felix the Cat. We meet again.
This is nice.
Yeah, the leg's broken, uh... throwing it away.
You're gonna toss it?
It's just a broken hinge, I could easily fix it.
This is you?
Yeah. Yeah. It's just some old stuff I drew.
Yeah, I don't really... I don't really get this kind of stuff.
This is disturbing. It's older stuff.
Where's your superhero shit?
Oh, I'm not really into superhero stuff.
I'm more into like, old humor comics and undergrounds.
This is what I'm working on right now.
What's this one?
Uh... oh, that's, it's Bill and Stan. It's uh...
It's ancient. Stop with that shit.
These are not ancient, you're not ancient.
You're 18.
It's an old father and son strip I used to do in middle school.
"What's so sad about losing his job?"
These jokes don't make any sense.
I begged my mom to send a letter to King Features Syndicate.
They distribute all the comics in the, you know, Princeton papers.
She sent those, and they sent them back without even opening them.
I was 13, I was already trying to be this hotshot professional.
It's pretty pathetic.
Oh no, it's hilarious that you thought these would ever be published.
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
What is it?
Merry Christmas.
Who's this? Oh uh...
Wallace, this is Miles.
For your new apartment.
On one side he's asleep and the other he's awake.
I'd leave him on his sleeping side.
Permanently.
Are these recent?
Yeah. I don't know. Uh...
I don't know. They're really good.
They're really not. Can you put them away, please? Yeah.
I don't really understand what you guys see in those funny animal comics.
You can't appreciate any funny animal comics?
Pogo? Pogo?
The Ducks? The Ducks?
Donald Duck and his nephews, Daisy, Grandma Duck,
Scrooge McDuck, Feathery Ducks.
Some of those Carl Barks Duck comics are actually pretty sophisticated.
Are you guys fucking Martians?
Those were for ten year-olds in the 50s.
The only people who read those now are pedophiles.
It's probably kid bait. Robert, that's bullshit.
You love the Duck comics. No I don't.
I stopped reading that Disney shit when I was like 15.
Fifteen is still kind of old to be reading the Ducks.
You know, Wallace used to work in the industry.
He used to work in Image.
Really? Yeah.
Shoot. Should've brought some of my new work.
Your work?
You know what? You should, You should go back home, get some stuff.
Yeah. I'll do that. Maybe. Maybe Wallace could give you some pointers.
Okay. I'll be back in seven minutes. Yeah.
Great. Cool.
And by the way, don't tell people I used to work for Image Comics.
That's not something I feel comfortable talking about.
Sorry about that.
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATION)
WALLACE: So you don't have the money. ROBERT: No I have the money.
WALLACE: Where is the money?
ROBERT: It's downstairs. I'll get it-- WALLACE: Go get the money.
ROBERT: I have the money, it's downstairs. WALLACE: Go get the money.
(DOOR OPENING)
What money?
None of your business.
You can take that. No, no, no, It's just...
He's fixing the table, so he...
Good. Wallace is gonna fix it? I'm just looking for tools.
Fixing the table and then he gets the table as a reward. Robert?
Robert. So, I'm just looking for tools for him to fix it.
Why are you doing this today?
What are you looking for, Robert? Duct tape.
He could be a career criminal, he could have killed somebody.
You have no idea who he is.
He's a stranger. He's not a stranger, he's my friend.
You know what? You're gonna stay down here, 'cause I forbid you to go upstairs.
What were you doing up there?
I was. I was. I was in my room and I wasn't near...
What's his name?
And you're not going to go near him, either. "What's his name?"
"What's his name" is my guest and you don't get to be rude to him.
Well, he's not our guest.
Okay? And you know what? You're gonna go back-- Don't touch me.
You're going to go back next semester.
Okay? You're gonna go back if I have to strap you
into a fucking straitjacket and put you on the bus, you understand?
Yeah. I'll be long dead before that happens.
Well, I'm sure you will.
I'm sure you will.
I'll visit your casket.
Okay? Come on. Let's go.
No, no, no... (BOTH GRUNTING)
Let go of me. Let go!
You think you're a rabble rouser?
You think you're a gangster?
(ROBERT BREATHING HEAVILY) You're a spoiled brat.
And that's all that this is, it's brat shit.
Do you understand me?
Let go.
If it's the last thing that you learn...
Fuck this. I'm leaving.
Wait. Where are you going? I can tell I'm not wanted.
Wait, wait! Don't touch me!
What about the lesson? I have the money. See?
It's $220.
You said $300.
Yeah. I'm sorry.
This is all I have. I'll have to owe you the rest.
Just please.
Please don't leave. Fine.
I fixed this, by the way.
See? I just bent back the hinge.
Are you okay?
This is uh...
Sort of a treat. You drew this?
Yeah, a while back. Held on to it all this time.
It's cool how they have the Image Inc. cover stock on it.
Well, that's great about the Image Inc. cover stock.
What about the art, asshole?
No, no, it's great. I love it.
Let me get the ink.
(SIGHS) God.
(WALLACE EXHALES)
Another.
They're really good.
I know.
Oh was this uh...
What was is this? An Image pencil test?
Yeah. For a pencil application. Never submitted.
(PENS JINGLING)
Okay. So...
Liefeld's inking is the gold standard.
Is it?
You should know that if you were studying Image from that period.
Oh yeah. Totally.
Thin lines.
The outlines could be thicker and chubbier looking, but not too thick.
I'm being particular, so you don't ruin it.
Here. You ink it so I don't fuck it up.
Are you sure? Yes, I'm sure.
Okay,
And...
if you do a good job,
maybe it will turn into something.
Seriously?
Look, I've haven't been in the game for a while but...
Let's just say I have connections.
You wanna...
I'm deeply moved. But be careful with that.
I just can't believe you would do that for me. Yeah, yeah.
Just be careful with that. Oh, okay.
I'm back.
I wanted to grab my original so you can see the details.
What do you think?
We're in the middle of a lesson. He paid for one lesson.
Just be careful with the shadows.
I can draw.
Katano said my style's my own.
Okay.
Don't know what that means.
Isn't imagination...
more important?
I mean, than craft?
You see the influence of the Duck book?
Just shut up, Miles. He doesn't care.
This is Wallace's?
Yeah, some sample stuff he did when he was separating.
MILES: Separating?
So you weren't even an artist at Image.
ROBERT: Miles, please. Is form really more important to you than soul?
Miles, please.
Is form really more important than soul to you?
What would Katano say about this?
Miles, please. Form is more important than soul?
Miles. Please. don't quiz a pro on art.
I'm quizzing him on soul. (SCREAMS) Don't--
Don't quiz me on soul.
What did you do?
Stand up. Now!
ROBERT: I was just practicing the texture, I was going to black it out.
I was gonna black that out eventually.
You ruined the fucking page.
Wallace. I was just practicing the texture. I'm just inking it out.
I'm... Look, I can white some of that out if you prefer.
I can do it great, I swear. No. You can't!
I'm trying to sell this, you fucking amateur!
Well, maybe what sells these days is originality.
Just face up to the fact that you failed and you're not very good.
Do I really just suck to you?
My style isn't-- You didn't fail.
If anything, he made it more...
Artistic.
No one in this room is an artist. Okay?
I'm not an artist.
You're not an artist.
You're definitely not an artist.
You don't just...
(SCREAMS) Get to be an artist!
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
It's not about being an artist.
Shut up, shut up!
You failed.
Yeah, but he failed with soul.
That's the difference.
Okay. Okay.
Can I um... Can I uh... Can I, um...
What? Can I take a look
at what you were writing?
Thank you. MILES: What are you doing?
Oh my God! Miles. Stop.
Guys, guys, guys. Chill out. Guys. Knock it off.
(BOTH GRUNTING)
ROBERT: What the fuck are you doing?
Please. Knock it off. (GRUNTING)
Stop! Stop!
Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. (MILES SCREAMS)
ROBERT: Oh my God!
Fuck! Fuck!
(CRYING) Miles!
ROBERT: Wallace! (SCREAMS)
What the fuck! LEWIS: What is going on!
What the fuck, Wallace! LEWIS: What is going on?
Oh my God.
Oh, fuck. What the fuck?
What... Miles! (SCREAMING)
Put pressure on it! Pressure! ROBERT: What do I do?
Get the first aid! First aid!
What is going on? Miles is hurt.
Oh my God, Lewis!
(CAR STARTING)
Oh my...
It doesn't work.
Wallace, it doesn't work.
It doesn't work.
(ENGINE ACCELERATING) No. It doesn't--
(CRASHES)
JENNIFER: I don't know.
LEWIS: (SCREAMING) Robert, get the first aid kit! Oh my God!
Oh my God, a man just crashed into our house!
Yes, he was just, I don't know. He was just--
Robert, get back here!
JENNIFER: Robert, get back here!
Robert, listen to me!
(BOTH PANTING)
(GRUNTS)
You have no right to interfere in my life!
(GRUNTS) Fuck you, you soulless creep!
You're obsessed with my failure!
Stay the fuck away from me.
Fucking creep.
(GROANING)
(SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING)
(BREATHING HEAVILY)