1
00:00:01,377 --> 00:00:03,629
Ballmastrz!

2
00:00:03,713 --> 00:00:06,382
Ace: "Children of the night
serenade wet nurse of reprisal;

3
00:00:06,466 --> 00:00:09,093
Scream, bloodsucker, scream!"

4
00:00:09,177 --> 00:00:11,179
[ Eerie music ]

5
00:00:12,180 --> 00:00:14,223
Gaz: [ Drunkenly ]
So I says to him,

6
00:00:14,307 --> 00:00:17,351
"Are you gonna
make me a freaking cake,

7
00:00:17,435 --> 00:00:21,355
or do I got to lick the batter
off that whisk first?"

8
00:00:21,439 --> 00:00:23,816
[ Laughs ]

9
00:00:23,900 --> 00:00:27,153
Then the cops showed up.
[ Sighs ]

10
00:00:27,236 --> 00:00:30,406
I've often wondered if they
ever found that poor aardvark.

11
00:00:30,490 --> 00:00:31,199
Uh...

12
00:00:31,282 --> 00:00:34,702
Ah, the sporting life!

13
00:00:34,786 --> 00:00:35,620
[ Sighs ]

14
00:00:35,703 --> 00:00:38,206
[ Bell rings ]
Last call.

15
00:00:38,915 --> 00:00:40,583
Alright, boys.

16
00:00:40,666 --> 00:00:43,836
Which one of you
lecherous lotharios

17
00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:45,797
wants to waltz Gaz Digzy out

18
00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:49,967
for a little
pants-off dance-off?

19
00:00:50,051 --> 00:00:51,093
No. Nah.

20
00:00:51,177 --> 00:00:53,262
No. Nope.

21
00:00:53,346 --> 00:00:55,181
Oh, no way, Jose!

22
00:00:55,264 --> 00:00:56,265
Oh, hello.

23
00:00:56,349 --> 00:00:58,935
What do we have here?

24
00:00:59,018 --> 00:01:04,565
Come on over
and introduce yourself to Mama.

25
00:01:04,649 --> 00:01:10,154
♪♪

26
00:01:10,238 --> 00:01:11,656
[ Monster growls ]

27
00:01:13,741 --> 00:01:17,787
Bergdorf Sanguine,
shadowy gentleman.

28
00:01:17,870 --> 00:01:20,498
Well, Bergdorf,
I'm Gaz Digzy.

29
00:01:20,581 --> 00:01:21,791
You might
have heard of me.

30
00:01:21,874 --> 00:01:25,545
I'm sort of a big deal
in these parts.

31
00:01:26,379 --> 00:01:30,299
Hey, are you a musician?
You look like a musician.

32
00:01:30,383 --> 00:01:35,304
I'm really feeling such
a strong connection between us.

33
00:01:35,388 --> 00:01:36,472
Robot:
Closing time.

34
00:01:36,556 --> 00:01:38,516
Don't got to go home,
but you can't stay here.

35
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:43,896
So what do you say, handsome,
my place or yours?

36
00:01:43,980 --> 00:01:47,483
Great.
My place it is.

37
00:01:47,567 --> 00:01:49,151
[ Wolf howls in distance ]

38
00:01:49,235 --> 00:01:54,198
♪♪

39
00:01:54,282 --> 00:01:58,035
Oh, ho, ho, couldn't wait,
huh, Romeo?

40
00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:00,913
[ Growls ]

41
00:02:00,997 --> 00:02:04,000
[ Laughs ]
Now, that tickles.

42
00:02:04,083 --> 00:02:05,793
[ Knocking on window ]

43
00:02:05,877 --> 00:02:07,962
Gaz: Ace.

44
00:02:08,045 --> 00:02:11,215
Ace, open the window.
Come on.

45
00:02:11,299 --> 00:02:12,216
[ Drowsily ]
Gaz?

46
00:02:12,300 --> 00:02:14,844
Open the window, Ace.
Let me in.

47
00:02:14,927 --> 00:02:15,678
[ Keypad beeps ]

48
00:02:16,762 --> 00:02:18,848
[ Distorted ]
Ace, listen to me.

49
00:02:18,931 --> 00:02:20,850
Don't take this
the wrong way,

50
00:02:20,933 --> 00:02:25,521
but I really need
to suck on you for a bit.

51
00:02:25,605 --> 00:02:26,856
[ Screams ]

52
00:02:26,939 --> 00:02:30,359
Gaz, what in the name of Crayzar
has happened to you?

53
00:02:30,443 --> 00:02:31,652
[ Screams ]

54
00:02:31,736 --> 00:02:33,070
Suck!

55
00:02:33,154 --> 00:02:35,448
[ Hisses ]
Suuuck!

56
00:02:35,531 --> 00:02:36,699
What's all the fuss about?

57
00:02:36,782 --> 00:02:38,784
Oh, oh, oh, hey, now.

58
00:02:38,868 --> 00:02:40,036
Well, congratulations.

59
00:02:40,119 --> 00:02:41,871
I guess dreams really
do come true, huh?

60
00:02:41,954 --> 00:02:44,916
I can never unsee this.

61
00:02:44,999 --> 00:02:46,584
Ew. I just barfed
in my mouth a little.

62
00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:47,919
[ Terrified screeching ]

63
00:02:48,002 --> 00:02:50,630
[ Screaming ]Help!
Get her off of me!

64
00:02:50,713 --> 00:02:51,839
She's lost her mind!

65
00:02:51,923 --> 00:02:55,092
I'm gonna suck
the life from you!

66
00:02:55,176 --> 00:02:57,219
Help!

67
00:02:57,303 --> 00:03:01,891
Uh, guys, I think Ace
actually needs our help.

68
00:03:01,974 --> 00:03:03,517
Suck. Suck!

69
00:03:03,601 --> 00:03:06,395
The master commands it!

70
00:03:06,479 --> 00:03:07,563
Fan-freaking-tastic.

71
00:03:07,647 --> 00:03:08,856
She's been huffing glue again,
everybody.

72
00:03:08,940 --> 00:03:10,942
The master?
Who's the master?

73
00:03:11,025 --> 00:03:15,780
Yes, the master.
I do the master's bidding.

74
00:03:15,863 --> 00:03:20,493
You all have to answer
to the master.

75
00:03:20,576 --> 00:03:22,495
Hey.
What's this mark?

76
00:03:22,578 --> 00:03:23,579
Is she sick?

77
00:03:23,663 --> 00:03:27,249
Whoa. That is one
far-out hickey.

78
00:03:27,333 --> 00:03:29,168
That's no
ordinary hickey.

79
00:03:29,251 --> 00:03:31,170
I've seen
this mark before.

80
00:03:31,253 --> 00:03:33,547
There are some things in this
universe we cannot comprehend,

81
00:03:33,631 --> 00:03:36,425
and yet they are true.

82
00:03:36,509 --> 00:03:38,052
We're not fighting
some sort of disease here.

83
00:03:38,135 --> 00:03:42,223
These marks were made
by something unspeakable.

84
00:03:42,306 --> 00:03:46,727
Out there from the dread reaches
of the far frontier to live,

85
00:03:46,811 --> 00:03:48,145
it feeds
off our dear friend.

86
00:03:48,229 --> 00:03:52,108
Right now, Gaz lives
beyond the grace of Crayzar,

87
00:03:52,191 --> 00:03:56,320
her very sanity a wanderer
in the outer darkness!

88
00:03:56,404 --> 00:04:00,783
Our team captain is under
the meddling enchantment of --

89
00:04:00,866 --> 00:04:02,868
Drugs.
It's drugs, people.

90
00:04:02,952 --> 00:04:04,954
We're talking about gas here,
am I right?

91
00:04:05,037 --> 00:04:07,123
[ Explosion,
electricity crackling ]

92
00:04:07,790 --> 00:04:09,500
[ All gasp ]

93
00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:10,584
Master!

94
00:04:10,668 --> 00:04:13,295
This dandy petunia
is the master?

95
00:04:13,379 --> 00:04:16,007
Leto: Pshhh.
He doesn't look so tough.

96
00:04:16,090 --> 00:04:19,135
Jump him!
Leptons, charge!

97
00:04:19,802 --> 00:04:21,095
[ Screeches ]

98
00:04:21,178 --> 00:04:23,764
Run away!

99
00:04:21,178 --> 00:04:23,764
I don't want
to get sucked!

100
00:04:23,848 --> 00:04:24,557
[ Roars ]

101
00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:28,269
[ Hissing ]

102
00:04:28,352 --> 00:04:30,062
[ Laughs ]

103
00:04:30,146 --> 00:04:32,398
Vampire:
[ Laughs maniacally ]

104
00:04:32,481 --> 00:04:33,816
It took Gaz!

105
00:04:33,899 --> 00:04:35,026
[ Sobbing ]
Our poor Gaz!

106
00:04:35,109 --> 00:04:38,821
Sweet tears of Crayzar,
what was that abomination?

107
00:04:38,904 --> 00:04:41,324
That was Vampire.

108
00:04:41,407 --> 00:04:42,491
[ All gasp ]

109
00:04:42,575 --> 00:04:45,244
The vampire --
horrible, parasitic beasts

110
00:04:45,327 --> 00:04:48,080
that haunt the remote
hinterlands of the far frontier.

111
00:04:48,164 --> 00:04:51,625
No one knows
if they're mutants, demons,

112
00:04:51,709 --> 00:04:53,919
or monsters from the stars.

113
00:04:54,003 --> 00:04:56,881
This one has seduced our Gaz!

114
00:04:56,964 --> 00:04:58,007
Wow, Dee.

115
00:04:58,090 --> 00:05:01,343
How do you know
all this creepy stuff?

116
00:05:01,427 --> 00:05:05,473
This role of illustrious athlete
wasn't my first job.

117
00:05:05,556 --> 00:05:08,768
So, I guess I was going through
a bit of a goth period.

118
00:05:08,851 --> 00:05:12,772
I answered a classifieds listing
for a position in pest control.

119
00:05:12,855 --> 00:05:15,983
It was in the boondocks,
and turnover was pretty high,

120
00:05:16,067 --> 00:05:18,360
which should have
been a red flag,

121
00:05:18,444 --> 00:05:21,572
but I took the gig
on account of the recession.

122
00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:22,865
The hours were crap,

123
00:05:22,948 --> 00:05:26,202
but it paid off
all my student loans in no time.

124
00:05:26,285 --> 00:05:29,246
I was a hero of consummate skill
and unearthly grace,

125
00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:33,375
feared and despised
by bloodsuckers everywhere!

126
00:05:33,459 --> 00:05:37,088
The terrors in the dark
grew to fear the name --

127
00:05:37,171 --> 00:05:39,882
Vampire Hunter Dee Dee.

128
00:05:39,965 --> 00:05:41,300
Dee Dee:
No, silly.

129
00:05:41,383 --> 00:05:43,427
Far Frontier
Pest Solutions, Inc.

130
00:05:43,511 --> 00:05:46,055
But, hey,
that has a nice ring to it.

131
00:05:46,138 --> 00:05:47,598
It could totally stick.

132
00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:50,851
The hour has come to take up
the sword once more.

133
00:05:50,935 --> 00:05:54,814
Dee, are you, like, half vampire
with superpowers or something?

134
00:05:54,897 --> 00:05:56,816
Nope.
I'm just a badass.

135
00:05:56,899 --> 00:05:58,234
Deal with it.

136
00:06:00,611 --> 00:06:01,695
[ Engine roars ]

137
00:06:01,779 --> 00:06:03,405
Gaz has been taken
as the bride of Vampire.

138
00:06:03,489 --> 00:06:07,159
We have to reach her before
they consummate at the union!

139
00:06:07,243 --> 00:06:09,745
Are you sure this isn't just
a fool's errand we're doing?

140
00:06:09,829 --> 00:06:12,414
I mean, who's to say she hasn't
boned that freak already?

141
00:06:12,498 --> 00:06:14,875
I mean, this is Gaz
we're talking about, right?

142
00:06:14,959 --> 00:06:16,085
All:
Baby Ball!

143
00:06:16,168 --> 00:06:18,254
Alright. Alright.
Jeez.

144
00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:23,801
[ Grunts ]

145
00:06:23,884 --> 00:06:26,428
[ Monsters growl and screech ]

146
00:06:28,806 --> 00:06:30,724
[ Screams ]

147
00:06:30,808 --> 00:06:32,226
Yah!

148
00:06:32,309 --> 00:06:34,353
Hi-yah!
Ah!

149
00:06:34,436 --> 00:06:35,980
Haaaaa!

150
00:06:36,063 --> 00:06:37,815
[ Screeches ]

151
00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:39,525
Yah! Wah!
[ Giggles ]

152
00:06:39,608 --> 00:06:43,154
♪♪

153
00:06:43,237 --> 00:06:45,906
Ballmastrz.

154
00:06:45,990 --> 00:06:48,367
[ Monsters growl ]

155
00:06:49,577 --> 00:06:50,953
Ace:
[ Laughs ]

156
00:06:51,036 --> 00:06:51,954
[ Screeches ]

157
00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:55,082
Ah!

158
00:06:57,626 --> 00:06:59,128
[ Screams ]

159
00:07:00,713 --> 00:07:03,549
[ All scream ]

160
00:07:04,300 --> 00:07:07,052
Ballmastrz.

161
00:07:07,136 --> 00:07:08,512
[ Laughs ]

162
00:07:08,596 --> 00:07:10,139
[ Chains rattle ]

163
00:07:10,222 --> 00:07:12,141
[ Flesh squelches ]

164
00:07:14,685 --> 00:07:16,729
[ Screams ]

165
00:07:16,812 --> 00:07:17,646
[ Laughs ]

166
00:07:17,730 --> 00:07:20,357
[ Groaning ]

167
00:07:21,692 --> 00:07:24,361
Yah!
[ Screams ]

168
00:07:24,445 --> 00:07:26,780
[ Sips chalice ]
Mmmm.

169
00:07:26,864 --> 00:07:28,324
Ah!
[ Chuckles nefariously ]

170
00:07:28,407 --> 00:07:31,702
Gaz:
Must clean.

171
00:07:28,407 --> 00:07:31,702
Vampire:
Yes.

172
00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:34,371
Must clean
for the master.

173
00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:34,371
Yes.

174
00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:41,503
Everything spotless, quality
service, unmatched value.

175
00:07:41,587 --> 00:07:43,631
Yes.

176
00:07:43,714 --> 00:07:45,674
Release our friend
from your wicked spell,

177
00:07:45,758 --> 00:07:46,550
or taste my blade!

178
00:07:46,634 --> 00:07:49,011
[ Laughs ]

179
00:07:50,679 --> 00:07:53,349
We're trapped!
Gaz is our only hope.

180
00:07:53,432 --> 00:07:54,725
We have to rally the strength
of her own inner spirit

181
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:57,019
to break the curse!

182
00:07:57,102 --> 00:07:59,688
Yeah, appeal to her sense
of self-worth and dignity!

183
00:07:59,772 --> 00:08:01,607
Oh, good luck with that!
Fight it, Gaz!

184
00:08:01,690 --> 00:08:03,067
Don't give into
this manipulator.

185
00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:06,070
You've never bent the knee
in servitude to a man before!

186
00:08:06,153 --> 00:08:09,198
This guy is definitely
not worth it!

187
00:08:09,281 --> 00:08:10,699
[ Sips chalice ]

188
00:08:10,783 --> 00:08:11,825
Meh!

189
00:08:11,909 --> 00:08:14,662
Gaz:
Must clean.

190
00:08:14,745 --> 00:08:15,746
[ Laughs ]

191
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,665
Must clean.

192
00:08:17,748 --> 00:08:21,377
Must clean.

193
00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:23,170
[ Sips chalice, sighs ]

194
00:08:23,254 --> 00:08:25,422
Must clean.

195
00:08:25,506 --> 00:08:27,925
♪♪

196
00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:31,470
[ Laughing maniacally ]

197
00:08:32,763 --> 00:08:36,642
Don't give in, Gaz!
Don't lose the true you!

198
00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:40,813
[ Growls ]

199
00:08:40,896 --> 00:08:43,565
Oh, I can't look!
He's gonna drink her blood!

200
00:08:43,649 --> 00:08:44,692
[ Echoing ]
Drink her blood.

201
00:08:44,775 --> 00:08:46,944
Drink her blood.

202
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:49,029
Drink her blood.

203
00:08:49,113 --> 00:08:51,615
Must -- Must drink.

204
00:08:51,699 --> 00:08:54,076
Must drink!

205
00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:55,619
Damn, I need a drink.

206
00:08:55,703 --> 00:08:58,414
[ Growling ]

207
00:08:58,497 --> 00:08:59,915
Yuck!

208
00:08:59,999 --> 00:09:03,752
The Bride of Vampire is
officially filing for divorce.

209
00:09:03,836 --> 00:09:06,714
[ Screams ]

210
00:09:09,341 --> 00:09:10,718
Now's our chance!

211
00:09:10,801 --> 00:09:12,761
Ball...

212
00:09:12,845 --> 00:09:14,722
Yah!
...mastrz.

213
00:09:14,805 --> 00:09:17,725
♪♪

214
00:09:17,808 --> 00:09:19,977
[ Groans ]

215
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,895
[ Exclaims ]

216
00:09:21,979 --> 00:09:23,147
[ Screams ]

217
00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:25,691
Die, vampire scum!

218
00:09:25,774 --> 00:09:34,908
♪♪

219
00:09:34,992 --> 00:09:43,167
♪♪

220
00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:45,502
Oh, Gaz,
I hope in the future

221
00:09:45,586 --> 00:09:46,587
you'll show
a little more discretion

222
00:09:46,670 --> 00:09:49,673
in your choice
of potential suitors.

223
00:09:49,757 --> 00:09:50,883
What can I say?

224
00:09:50,966 --> 00:09:52,509
When choosing between two evils,

225
00:09:52,593 --> 00:09:55,888
I always like to try the one
I've never tried before.

226
00:09:55,971 --> 00:09:57,222
[ Laughs ]
Oh, Gaz.

227
00:09:57,306 --> 00:09:59,892
Incorrigible, floozy.
My kind of gal!

228
00:09:59,975 --> 00:10:04,396
I generally avoid temptation
unless I can't resist it.

229
00:10:04,480 --> 00:10:05,981
What I meant to say is...

230
00:10:06,065 --> 00:10:10,361
stop picking up shady losers in
dive bars when you're hammered!

231
00:10:10,444 --> 00:10:11,653
Alright.
I get it.

232
00:10:11,737 --> 00:10:13,906
I dodged a real bullet
with this one,

233
00:10:13,989 --> 00:10:15,824
but enough with the lectures.

234
00:10:15,908 --> 00:10:17,910
Let's celebrate!

235
00:10:17,993 --> 00:10:22,247
I'm a free woman!
Who's down for body shots?

236
00:10:22,331 --> 00:10:23,332
[ Cheers ]

237
00:10:24,792 --> 00:10:34,259
♪♪

238
00:10:34,343 --> 00:10:43,060
♪♪

239
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:46,188
♪♪

240
00:10:46,271 --> 00:10:47,731
Chirp.

241
00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:49,274
Rad.