1
00:00:01,300 --> 00:00:02,606
[MUZAK PLAYING]
2
00:00:04,129 --> 00:00:08,481
"Total protection from the sun."
3
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[UP-TEMPO FOLK MUSIC]
4
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- VOCALIST: Hey!
- [BAT SQUEAKS]
5
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[QUIRKY MUSIC]
6
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- He's been off his food for days.
7
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- Hmm.
8
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This cage stinks.
Is that shit or death?
9
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[♪♪♪]
10
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Poke him.
11
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- You poke him!
- Mm...
12
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[♪♪♪]
13
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Oh.
14
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- Ugh.
15
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We could try CPR.
16
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Apparently, you do it
to "Staying Alive."
17
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It's like...
♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, staying alive, staying alive ♪
18
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- With a tiny
gerbil-sized heart?
19
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Don't think so,
it's gotta be something quicker
20
00:00:51,307 --> 00:00:52,786
like the "Benny Hill" theme.
21
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No... he's gone.
22
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I'm calling it.
Sprout's dead.
23
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- Oh, shit.
24
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How are you gonna tell the kids?
25
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- Me?
- Yeah.
26
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[DOORBELL BUZZES]
Oh.
27
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I told you to take the key!
28
00:01:08,150 --> 00:01:09,325
- Okay, kids deposited
29
00:01:09,368 --> 00:01:11,718
at the indoctrination center,
breakfast bought.
30
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I'm making myself
indispensable, aren't I?
31
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- No.
- Okay.
32
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Artisan sourdough,
only they have no idea
33
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how to make real sourdough.
34
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Terrible coffee
they think is great coffee,
35
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and what they call
Danish pastries,
36
00:01:28,126 --> 00:01:30,346
which have zero to do
with actual Danish pastries.
37
00:01:30,389 --> 00:01:34,219
- Yummy.
- All this for only £15,000!
38
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- Uh, Ally, I'm gonna stick
Sprout in the freezer
39
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till we decide what to do with him.
40
00:01:38,397 --> 00:01:39,461
- The gerbil's dead, Michael.
41
00:01:39,485 --> 00:01:41,835
- That would also be
my diagnosis.
42
00:01:41,879 --> 00:01:44,099
You should replace him
before Luke and Ava get home.
43
00:01:44,142 --> 00:01:45,317
- No way!
44
00:01:45,361 --> 00:01:47,754
They need to learn about life
and death and saying good-bye.
45
00:01:47,798 --> 00:01:51,149
- It's what we did with Frank.
Ally's fish.
46
00:01:51,193 --> 00:01:53,282
There must have been
at least five Franks.
47
00:01:53,325 --> 00:01:56,198
He was a different size
every time.
48
00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:58,374
- Any luck with finding
a place to live, Michael?
49
00:01:58,417 --> 00:01:59,853
- Oh, yeah, loads of leads.
50
00:01:59,897 --> 00:02:05,207
Just a ton of possibilities
bubbling away, really.
51
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- He's never gonna leave, is he?
52
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- Christ, no.
53
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[UPBEAT MUSIC]
54
00:02:12,388 --> 00:02:15,739
[♪♪♪]
55
00:02:15,782 --> 00:02:18,350
- Can I go home now?
56
00:02:18,394 --> 00:02:20,309
- The doctors and nurses
need to check
57
00:02:20,352 --> 00:02:22,006
a few things first,
but you're so...
58
00:02:22,049 --> 00:02:24,269
- Hey, you two.
Hey, kids.
59
00:02:24,313 --> 00:02:25,464
- Don't turn
the telly off, Paul.
60
00:02:25,488 --> 00:02:27,272
- Paul?
61
00:02:27,316 --> 00:02:28,554
- Daddy's got something to tell you.
62
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- Right.
63
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Uh, listen, s-sometimes...
64
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When you get very old or very ill,
65
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your body just sort of...
66
00:02:39,328 --> 00:02:42,244
shuts down, you know, like a...
67
00:02:42,287 --> 00:02:44,071
- A computer.
- Hmm.
68
00:02:44,115 --> 00:02:47,423
- No, more final.
Uh, like a coal mine.
69
00:02:47,466 --> 00:02:49,555
- Thank you.
70
00:02:49,599 --> 00:02:52,645
Sprout... died,
71
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I'm afraid.
72
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He's dead.
73
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- [WHIMPERS]
74
00:02:59,435 --> 00:03:01,611
- Oh.
- [SOBBING]
75
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- No, it's okay.
76
00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:04,483
Sprout's gone,
77
00:03:04,527 --> 00:03:07,399
but he's part of the universe now.
78
00:03:07,443 --> 00:03:11,186
- But Mrs. Fisher says
the universe is huge.
79
00:03:11,229 --> 00:03:12,578
How will we find him?
80
00:03:12,622 --> 00:03:17,496
- Oh, look, mate,
if the old gerbils don't die,
81
00:03:17,540 --> 00:03:19,257
then the new ones can't
come through, can they?
82
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It's like the circle of life.
83
00:03:21,413 --> 00:03:22,545
You've seen "The Lion King."
84
00:03:22,588 --> 00:03:24,329
- But Sprout was only two.
85
00:03:24,373 --> 00:03:26,505
- I know, but that's, like, Grandpa's age,
86
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isn't it, in gerbil years.
87
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- Yes!
- Kids.
88
00:03:29,116 --> 00:03:30,422
Sprout's not really dead.
89
00:03:30,466 --> 00:03:32,468
- That's not helpful.
- He sort of is dead.
90
00:03:32,511 --> 00:03:35,210
- Luke, can you see Sprout in your mind?
91
00:03:37,516 --> 00:03:39,344
- I think I can.
- Yeah.
92
00:03:39,388 --> 00:03:42,260
Ava, can you hear him drinking
from his little water bottle?
93
00:03:42,304 --> 00:03:43,435
[CLICKING TONGUE]
94
00:03:43,479 --> 00:03:47,483
- Yes.
- Do you love Sprout?
95
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Will you remember him forever?
96
00:03:48,614 --> 00:03:50,660
- Yeah.
- Then he's not dead.
97
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He just lives inside you now,
that's all.
98
00:03:54,359 --> 00:03:56,535
- Is that true, Paul?
99
00:03:56,579 --> 00:03:57,667
- Uh, yeah, in a--
in a way.
100
00:03:57,710 --> 00:03:59,601
This is because you call
your dad Michael, you know,
101
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all this Paul bollocks.
102
00:04:00,931 --> 00:04:03,238
- I just have to run out
for about half an hour.
103
00:04:03,281 --> 00:04:04,891
- Take a key.
- Yeah.
104
00:04:04,935 --> 00:04:07,720
- You okay?
- Mm...
105
00:04:08,939 --> 00:04:10,438
- Well, that's not really teaching them
106
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about death, is it?
107
00:04:11,637 --> 00:04:12,464
Telling them the gerbil’s not really dead?
108
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- They seem fine.
109
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I guess that's what
religion is, right?
110
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Heaven and that shit?
111
00:04:18,296 --> 00:04:19,689
- I'm sort of glad Sprout’s dead.
112
00:04:19,732 --> 00:04:21,473
- Oh, fuck me, yeah.
The smell.
113
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Having to have him looked after
when we went away.
114
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And gerbils don't
give affection.
115
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They're just little eating
and shitting tubes.
116
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We mustn't get another one.
117
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- Hell, no.
118
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[QUIRKY MUSIC]
119
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[♪♪♪]
120
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- Hey, Sprout 2.0,
you're gonna be a surprise
121
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for a couple
of really nice kids.
122
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- Oh, shit!
123
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- I didn't see him, right?
124
00:04:49,371 --> 00:04:50,502
[STARK MUSIC]
125
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He just stepped out.
I didn't see him.
126
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- Get your phone out.
Get your phone out quickly.
127
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[♪♪♪]
128
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Um, can you--
can you hear me?
129
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Can you hear me?
130
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[♪♪♪]
131
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♪ Whether you're a brother
or whether you're a mother ♪
132
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♪ Staying alive, staying alive ♪
133
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♪ Ha, ha, ha, ha,
staying alive, staying alive ♪
134
00:05:18,225 --> 00:05:20,576
- Telly off!
Dinner's on the table!
135
00:05:20,619 --> 00:05:22,882
- Okay, coming!
136
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[DOORBELL BUZZES]
137
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- I told you to take a key,
you mad old wanker!
138
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Oh, God, I'm so sorry.
139
00:05:30,629 --> 00:05:32,327
I thought you were someone else.
140
00:05:32,370 --> 00:05:34,372
- Does a Mr. Michael Grant
live here?
141
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- What has he done?
142
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- Is it all right if I come in?
143
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- Yeah.
144
00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:46,079
He doesn't, like, actually,
like, really live here.
145
00:05:46,123 --> 00:05:49,213
He's just staying here
temporarily.
146
00:05:49,256 --> 00:05:52,172
- Is Mr. Grant a relative, a friend?
147
00:05:52,216 --> 00:05:54,479
- He's my father, my dad,
but I don't--
148
00:05:54,523 --> 00:05:56,786
I don't call him Dad.
I call him Michael.
149
00:05:56,829 --> 00:05:58,527
He's dead, isn't he?
150
00:05:58,570 --> 00:06:01,181
- I'm sorry, yes.
151
00:06:01,225 --> 00:06:03,575
Mr. Grant was involved in a collision.
152
00:06:03,619 --> 00:06:05,751
- [LAUGHS]
153
00:06:07,579 --> 00:06:10,452
I'm so sorry.
Are you--
154
00:06:10,495 --> 00:06:12,454
are you absolutely sure
that he's dead?
155
00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:15,152
Because he was alive,
like, an hour ago.
156
00:06:15,195 --> 00:06:17,633
- Efforts were made to revive him,
157
00:06:17,676 --> 00:06:19,635
but unfortunately, he was pronounced dead
158
00:06:19,678 --> 00:06:22,551
at the scene of the accident.
159
00:06:22,594 --> 00:06:25,641
- Where was he?
- On Church Street.
160
00:06:25,684 --> 00:06:27,338
We believe he'd just made a purchase
161
00:06:27,382 --> 00:06:30,646
from the Alpha Pet Store, a gerbil.
162
00:06:30,689 --> 00:06:32,561
- Ha!
163
00:06:35,912 --> 00:06:38,218
Is it safe?
164
00:06:38,262 --> 00:06:40,612
- We don't have it.
165
00:06:40,656 --> 00:06:43,267
Is there someone I can call,
a friend maybe?
166
00:06:43,310 --> 00:06:44,505
- Do you have people
out looking for him,
167
00:06:44,529 --> 00:06:45,748
for the--
for the gerbil?
168
00:06:45,791 --> 00:06:47,793
Because they can't survive
in the wild
169
00:06:47,837 --> 00:06:49,012
like foxes and stuff.
170
00:06:49,055 --> 00:06:50,729
- Perhaps you have a partner
I can contact?
171
00:06:50,753 --> 00:06:52,407
- No, I--
oh, no, I'm fine, I'm fine.
172
00:06:52,450 --> 00:06:54,496
My boyfriend
is gonna be back soon.
173
00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:56,149
He's just gone out
to get some booze,
174
00:06:56,193 --> 00:06:57,910
because we've had a bit
of a day of deaths, actually.
175
00:06:57,934 --> 00:07:00,676
- Oh, I'm very sorry.
- No.
176
00:07:00,719 --> 00:07:02,567
Um, do you want some pasta?
I've made some pasta.
177
00:07:02,591 --> 00:07:05,637
It's vegan, but--
oh, shit, no.
178
00:07:05,681 --> 00:07:08,553
I put cheese--
I put cheese in it.
179
00:07:10,076 --> 00:07:13,036
[DOWNBEAT MUSIC]
180
00:07:13,079 --> 00:07:20,043
[♪♪♪]
181
00:07:20,086 --> 00:07:22,437
- Hey, remember
what we talked about before,
182
00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:24,569
when Sprout passed on?
183
00:07:24,613 --> 00:07:27,659
And eventually,
you were very brave.
184
00:07:27,703 --> 00:07:30,662
Well... this afternoon,
185
00:07:30,706 --> 00:07:34,318
Granddad Michael,
you know, Mummy's daddy,
186
00:07:34,361 --> 00:07:35,711
he left us.
187
00:07:37,930 --> 00:07:39,279
He died.
188
00:07:40,672 --> 00:07:41,672
He's dead.
189
00:07:46,635 --> 00:07:48,375
Which is obviously very sad.
190
00:07:51,944 --> 00:07:53,598
Have you got any questions?
191
00:07:53,642 --> 00:07:56,296
- No, Paul, I haven't.
192
00:07:56,340 --> 00:07:57,820
- Do you understand
what I'm saying?
193
00:07:57,863 --> 00:08:00,649
- Yes, Paul.
- But you're not sad?
194
00:08:00,692 --> 00:08:03,608
- No, because Michael said when people die,
195
00:08:03,652 --> 00:08:04,609
they live inside of you.
196
00:08:04,653 --> 00:08:06,655
- Mm-hmm.
- So he's not really dead.
197
00:08:06,698 --> 00:08:08,134
- He is, though.
198
00:08:13,749 --> 00:08:15,098
What about if I died?
199
00:08:15,141 --> 00:08:18,493
- I think you would live inside us too.
200
00:08:18,536 --> 00:08:19,687
- Well, that's probably
quite a nice way
201
00:08:19,711 --> 00:08:20,732
of looking at it, actually.
202
00:08:20,756 --> 00:08:21,974
Hmm.
203
00:08:22,018 --> 00:08:23,889
- Can you stop me and Ava
from dying?
204
00:08:23,933 --> 00:08:25,587
- Oh, mate.
205
00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:28,807
I would do everything
humanly possible
206
00:08:28,851 --> 00:08:30,809
to keep you and Ava safe,
you know I would.
207
00:08:30,853 --> 00:08:35,161
But, truth is,
eventually, everyone...
208
00:08:35,205 --> 00:08:38,338
- [WHIMPERING]
209
00:08:38,382 --> 00:08:40,819
- Hey, hey, hey,
there's no need to be sad.
210
00:08:40,863 --> 00:08:42,908
Listen, listen, mate,
that's not gonna happen
211
00:08:42,952 --> 00:08:45,737
for a long, long, long time.
212
00:08:48,044 --> 00:08:52,657
Hey, haven't you--
you must have known that.
213
00:08:52,701 --> 00:08:56,748
Luke, oh, Christ.
I'm sorry, I didn't--
214
00:08:56,792 --> 00:08:58,924
oh, right--
excuse me, darling.
215
00:08:58,968 --> 00:09:01,231
Hey.
216
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:02,774
- Um, I'm just gonna call Mum.
Is everything okay?
217
00:09:02,798 --> 00:09:03,755
- Uh, yeah, no--
218
00:09:03,799 --> 00:09:05,801
Luke's just upset about your dad.
219
00:09:05,844 --> 00:09:06,584
- Aww.
220
00:09:06,628 --> 00:09:08,064
- It seems he was really important
221
00:09:08,107 --> 00:09:09,718
to both of them, but I've got this.
222
00:09:09,761 --> 00:09:11,633
Don't worry. You go and call Leah.
223
00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:14,026
- Oh, thank you, darling.
- All right.
224
00:09:15,985 --> 00:09:17,421
All right.
225
00:09:23,427 --> 00:09:26,778
[QUIRKY MUSIC]
226
00:09:26,822 --> 00:09:28,824
- Whoo, well, don't you two look fancy?
227
00:09:28,867 --> 00:09:31,130
- We found them
in Grandpa Michael's suitcase.
228
00:09:31,174 --> 00:09:34,090
I found a scarf,
and Ava found a bracelet.
229
00:09:34,133 --> 00:09:35,613
- Look.
- Take that off.
230
00:09:35,657 --> 00:09:37,789
- No.
- Just let her wear it, Mum.
231
00:09:37,833 --> 00:09:39,530
- She can't, it's a cock ring.
232
00:09:39,574 --> 00:09:40,966
- Oh, my God. Come here.
233
00:09:41,010 --> 00:09:43,882
- No, I want to keep it!
- I gave it to your father.
234
00:09:43,926 --> 00:09:46,842
I can't believe he kept it
all these years.
235
00:09:46,885 --> 00:09:48,887
It's quite touching, actually.
236
00:09:48,931 --> 00:09:51,411
- Ava's wearing Dad's cock ring
as a bracelet.
237
00:09:51,455 --> 00:09:53,022
- Well, there's a thing.
- Mm.
238
00:09:53,065 --> 00:09:54,763
- I wasn't expecting
to feel this emotional
239
00:09:54,806 --> 00:09:57,243
about the big shit's death.
240
00:09:57,287 --> 00:09:58,854
- Paul's going to identify
his body.
241
00:09:58,897 --> 00:09:59,768
- Mm-hmm.
242
00:09:59,811 --> 00:10:01,465
- Well, I think I should,
as his widow.
243
00:10:01,508 --> 00:10:02,684
- Widow?
- We never divorced.
244
00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:05,687
So technically,
I am still Mrs. Big Shit.
245
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:06,731
- Actually, sorry,
246
00:10:06,775 --> 00:10:08,056
can you stop calling him that, please?
247
00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:09,168
- No.
248
00:10:09,212 --> 00:10:10,474
He was a big shit in life,
249
00:10:10,517 --> 00:10:11,693
and he's a big shit in death.
250
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,912
- Well, I think Michael should be identified
251
00:10:13,956 --> 00:10:15,716
by someone who doesn't think
he was a big shit.
252
00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:16,804
- Good luck finding that person.
253
00:10:16,828 --> 00:10:18,830
- Actually, Leah, that person is me.
254
00:10:18,874 --> 00:10:21,267
'Cause even though he may
have had shitty qualities,
255
00:10:21,311 --> 00:10:23,356
he wasn't as much of a twat
256
00:10:23,400 --> 00:10:25,228
as, admittedly, he first appeared to be,
257
00:10:25,271 --> 00:10:27,447
and the kids liked him, so, Leah,
258
00:10:27,491 --> 00:10:31,060
I'd like you to stop referring
to Ally's father as a big shit.
259
00:10:33,323 --> 00:10:35,891
- Fine. Sorry, Paul.
260
00:10:35,934 --> 00:10:37,806
- Well, it's not me
you need to apologize to.
261
00:10:40,025 --> 00:10:42,506
- Sorry, Michael.
262
00:10:42,549 --> 00:10:44,464
- No, no, your daughter.
263
00:10:44,508 --> 00:10:46,292
Apologize to Ally.
264
00:10:48,381 --> 00:10:49,774
- Sorry, Ally.
265
00:10:52,516 --> 00:10:53,691
- Okay.
266
00:10:53,735 --> 00:10:55,737
I'll see you soon.
267
00:10:55,780 --> 00:11:00,959
[♪♪♪]
268
00:11:01,003 --> 00:11:02,657
- Hey, thank you
for saying that to Mum.
269
00:11:02,700 --> 00:11:04,963
- It's all right.
270
00:11:05,007 --> 00:11:06,114
- Hurry back,
because I'm strangely
271
00:11:06,138 --> 00:11:08,097
very, very horny.
272
00:11:08,140 --> 00:11:09,968
Mm.
273
00:11:10,012 --> 00:11:15,887
[♪♪♪]
274
00:11:19,717 --> 00:11:21,545
- Blimey.
275
00:11:21,588 --> 00:11:23,373
- Oh, glad to catch you, Paul.
276
00:11:23,416 --> 00:11:25,216
I'm objecting to the sheltered
housing scheme,
277
00:11:25,244 --> 00:11:27,464
and I wondered if you'd like
to object separately.
278
00:11:27,507 --> 00:11:28,789
- Can't talk now, Carl,
sorry, I'm just off
279
00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:31,686
to identify
my father-in-law's dead body.
280
00:11:31,729 --> 00:11:34,471
- Oh, God, no.
I'm so sorry, I--
281
00:11:34,514 --> 00:11:36,952
- Don't look at that.
282
00:11:36,995 --> 00:11:39,824
- Grief can be a strange beast.
- Yes.
283
00:11:42,392 --> 00:11:43,828
I'm gonna...
284
00:11:46,962 --> 00:11:48,920
[♪♪♪]
285
00:11:48,964 --> 00:11:50,922
Come on.
You can't do this to me.
286
00:11:50,966 --> 00:11:52,552
I don't even know
what your dad looks like.
287
00:11:52,576 --> 00:11:53,896
- I'm really sorry.
I can't leave.
288
00:11:53,925 --> 00:11:56,841
I'm trying to make
a good impression on Darren.
289
00:11:56,885 --> 00:11:57,949
- Hang on,
I'm supposed to be making
290
00:11:57,973 --> 00:11:59,975
a good impression on your dad.
291
00:12:00,018 --> 00:12:02,040
- Look, it was your idea
to meet him, it'll be fine.
292
00:12:02,064 --> 00:12:03,084
You'll probably get on
like a house on fire.
293
00:12:03,108 --> 00:12:04,806
- Okay, fine, fine.
294
00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:06,218
You'll hear about it later,
I guess.
295
00:12:06,242 --> 00:12:07,243
Love you.
296
00:12:07,286 --> 00:12:09,680
- Yeah, love you, bye.
297
00:12:09,724 --> 00:12:11,856
- Fuck's sake.
298
00:12:11,900 --> 00:12:17,732
[♪♪♪]
299
00:12:25,914 --> 00:12:26,978
Uh, looks like
she's not gonna make it,
300
00:12:27,002 --> 00:12:28,481
so do you want to put
a pin in this
301
00:12:28,525 --> 00:12:30,024
until we can actually
get together with Ally?
302
00:12:30,048 --> 00:12:32,007
- Yeah, yeah.
303
00:12:32,050 --> 00:12:34,009
Well, been very pleasant almost meeting you.
304
00:12:34,052 --> 00:12:37,055
- Yeah, you too, Michael.
- Yeah, oh, uh--
305
00:12:37,099 --> 00:12:38,622
- I've got this, it's fine.
306
00:12:38,665 --> 00:12:39,928
[♪♪♪]
307
00:12:39,971 --> 00:12:41,514
- Yeah, I think I'll head out
to somewhere
308
00:12:41,538 --> 00:12:43,061
a little more Turkish.
- Ah.
309
00:12:43,105 --> 00:12:44,454
- You're welcome to join me, Liam.
310
00:12:44,497 --> 00:12:46,630
- It's Paul,
and you're good, thanks.
311
00:12:46,673 --> 00:12:48,806
- Oh, sorry, Christ.
312
00:12:48,850 --> 00:12:51,853
You know, Liam was this
dull-witted knuckle-dick.
313
00:12:51,896 --> 00:12:52,984
I hated him.
314
00:12:53,028 --> 00:12:54,856
- You know, I have got time
for a quick one.
315
00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:55,900
- Do you?
- Yeah.
316
00:12:55,944 --> 00:12:57,293
- Good.
317
00:12:57,336 --> 00:13:00,426
[♪♪♪]
318
00:13:00,470 --> 00:13:01,471
- Ooh.
319
00:13:04,256 --> 00:13:09,784
[♪♪♪]
320
00:13:15,137 --> 00:13:16,137
Mm.
321
00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:25,016
I just want you to know
that I'll look after Ally.
322
00:13:25,060 --> 00:13:26,844
Probably better
than you ever did.
323
00:13:26,888 --> 00:13:30,979
Sorry, that was below the belt,
in the circumstances.
324
00:13:31,022 --> 00:13:34,809
Anyway, just, uh... yeah.
325
00:13:36,854 --> 00:13:39,944
I want to thank you for having
such an amazing daughter.
326
00:13:42,468 --> 00:13:44,209
You have a rest, mate.
327
00:13:49,301 --> 00:13:50,999
Mm... just...
328
00:13:59,877 --> 00:14:00,878
[DOOR SNAPS SHUT]
329
00:14:02,662 --> 00:14:03,925
Hello.
330
00:14:03,968 --> 00:14:05,883
- Hi. Was it awful?
331
00:14:07,189 --> 00:14:10,018
- The policewoman said
it takes strength, but...
332
00:14:10,061 --> 00:14:11,062
- Aww.
333
00:14:12,803 --> 00:14:14,239
It happened again.
334
00:14:14,283 --> 00:14:17,503
I laughed when I told my
cousins about Michael being...
335
00:14:17,547 --> 00:14:18,940
- Dead?
- Ha!
336
00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:22,073
Oh, my God.
Am I going mad?
337
00:14:22,117 --> 00:14:24,032
- No, it's a bereavement thing.
338
00:14:24,075 --> 00:14:26,991
It's paradoxical laughter.
339
00:14:27,035 --> 00:14:30,908
- Thank you for being so brave
and so strong
340
00:14:30,952 --> 00:14:33,171
and so sexy.
341
00:14:33,215 --> 00:14:35,173
Come here.
342
00:14:35,217 --> 00:14:41,484
[♪♪♪]
343
00:14:45,575 --> 00:14:48,143
Wait, we can have that Bolognese tomorrow.
344
00:14:48,186 --> 00:14:49,100
- No, no, I'll make another one.
345
00:14:49,144 --> 00:14:50,493
- No, we're out of garlic.
346
00:14:50,536 --> 00:14:52,669
- I'll use the granules.
I prefer them anyway.
347
00:14:52,712 --> 00:14:54,366
[BOTH MOAN]
348
00:14:54,410 --> 00:14:57,065
[♪♪♪]
349
00:14:57,108 --> 00:14:59,458
- No, this is wrong.
- No, this isn't wrong.
350
00:14:59,502 --> 00:15:01,112
This is all kinds of right.
351
00:15:01,156 --> 00:15:04,115
Come with me tonight
on the train to Ipswich.
352
00:15:04,159 --> 00:15:06,074
- Yes!
353
00:15:06,117 --> 00:15:08,206
[GRANDIOSE ORCHESTRAL MUSIC]
[CHARACTERS MOANING]
354
00:15:08,250 --> 00:15:10,121
[♪♪♪]
355
00:15:10,165 --> 00:15:13,211
- She's here, thank God.
I am so, so sorry.
356
00:15:13,255 --> 00:15:14,972
- Oh, no, it's fine.
No, it's fine, it's fine.
357
00:15:14,996 --> 00:15:16,519
- You didn't have to come in, really.
358
00:15:16,562 --> 00:15:19,174
You stay away as long as you need to.
359
00:15:19,217 --> 00:15:21,306
I mean, it's chaos without you.
[LAUGHS]
360
00:15:21,350 --> 00:15:24,309
I'm joking, we can cope.
Sort of.
361
00:15:24,353 --> 00:15:27,095
You go home,
take all the time you need,
362
00:15:27,138 --> 00:15:28,531
but before you do, could you see
363
00:15:28,574 --> 00:15:30,228
if you can mix
the strings high enough
364
00:15:30,272 --> 00:15:32,143
to make the moan
less powerfully erotic?
365
00:15:32,187 --> 00:15:33,144
- Sure.
366
00:15:33,188 --> 00:15:34,145
[TAPE WHIRRING]
367
00:15:34,189 --> 00:15:36,104
- Yes!
368
00:15:36,147 --> 00:15:37,453
[♪♪♪]
369
00:15:37,496 --> 00:15:39,150
- You're bloody incredible.
370
00:15:39,194 --> 00:15:41,065
- I haven't even done anything yet.
371
00:15:41,109 --> 00:15:42,980
- I'm talking about
your dad passing.
372
00:15:43,024 --> 00:15:44,851
Stupid word.
373
00:15:44,895 --> 00:15:46,027
Dying.
374
00:15:46,070 --> 00:15:48,246
When Ma died,
I was a soggy mess.
375
00:15:48,290 --> 00:15:50,683
Went to a grief specialist.
I can give you her number.
376
00:15:50,727 --> 00:15:54,513
She's this fantastic,
full-bodied older lady.
377
00:15:54,557 --> 00:15:56,167
She held me in her fleshy arms
378
00:15:56,211 --> 00:16:00,258
and rocked me like a baby
for 45 incredible minutes.
379
00:16:00,302 --> 00:16:01,042
- Wrong.
380
00:16:01,085 --> 00:16:03,000
- Yeah, I'm not sure
that's quite my thing.
381
00:16:03,044 --> 00:16:05,002
- Ipswich.
- Oh, no, no, it wasn't sexual.
382
00:16:05,046 --> 00:16:07,004
- No, brilliant.
- Don't contain the grief.
383
00:16:07,048 --> 00:16:10,138
Let it bleed through your pores.
384
00:16:10,181 --> 00:16:13,184
- Darren, I'm just trying to--
- Purge yourself of it.
385
00:16:13,228 --> 00:16:14,577
Flush it through--
- Darren!
386
00:16:14,620 --> 00:16:16,100
Darren, I'm fine. It's all fine.
387
00:16:16,144 --> 00:16:17,188
I barely knew Michael.
388
00:16:17,232 --> 00:16:18,885
I mean, you know,
I'm sad he's dead,
389
00:16:18,929 --> 00:16:21,018
but there are more important
things to me.
390
00:16:21,062 --> 00:16:23,368
Kids. Paul.
My job.
391
00:16:23,412 --> 00:16:26,676
- I hear you, yeah, and Dolby 5.1.
392
00:16:26,719 --> 00:16:29,244
- I'm not sure you do,
but thanks.
393
00:16:29,287 --> 00:16:30,941
- I admire and respect
your strength
394
00:16:30,985 --> 00:16:34,771
and positive agency so, so much.
395
00:16:34,814 --> 00:16:36,381
- Cool.
396
00:16:36,425 --> 00:16:39,210
- Come with me tonight
on the train to Ipswich.
397
00:16:39,254 --> 00:16:42,344
[TAPE WHIRS]
[GRANDIOSE ORCHESTRAL MUSIC]
398
00:16:42,387 --> 00:16:44,259
- Yes!
399
00:16:44,302 --> 00:16:46,174
[CHARACTER MOANS SOFTLY]
400
00:16:51,222 --> 00:16:54,617
- Literally everything
you're doing is turning me on.
401
00:16:54,660 --> 00:16:56,314
I've never had sex like that before,
402
00:16:56,358 --> 00:16:57,185
not even in our sex heyday.
403
00:16:57,228 --> 00:17:00,057
Last night, it was--
it was dirty.
404
00:17:00,101 --> 00:17:02,059
- Was it okay to--
405
00:17:02,103 --> 00:17:05,149
I mean, even all right
to do what we did?
406
00:17:05,193 --> 00:17:06,150
It seemed a bit modern.
407
00:17:06,194 --> 00:17:08,109
- It was great sex, Paul.
408
00:17:08,152 --> 00:17:09,675
It was better than cocaine sex.
409
00:17:09,719 --> 00:17:11,286
- Well, we've never
had cocaine sex.
410
00:17:11,329 --> 00:17:13,723
- No, but...
- Have you had cocaine sex?
411
00:17:13,766 --> 00:17:18,075
- Just a little bit, but that was the best.
412
00:17:18,119 --> 00:17:19,076
- Right.
- Hey, talk admin to me.
413
00:17:19,120 --> 00:17:21,513
Tell me how organized you are.
414
00:17:23,602 --> 00:17:26,953
Go on! Do it. It'll work.
415
00:17:26,997 --> 00:17:29,695
- Okay, uh,
I had to play hardball
416
00:17:29,739 --> 00:17:31,175
with Michael's solicitor.
417
00:17:31,219 --> 00:17:32,263
- Mm.
418
00:17:32,307 --> 00:17:34,700
- Because his will states...
- Mm-hmm.
419
00:17:34,744 --> 00:17:39,227
- That his corpse should be--
not corpse, not corpse,
420
00:17:39,270 --> 00:17:43,666
his body should go, sorry,
to medical science.
421
00:17:43,709 --> 00:17:48,105
And there's to be no funeral,
so this-- fucking hell.
422
00:17:48,149 --> 00:17:53,197
- You can do it.
- To be no, um... poems.
423
00:17:53,241 --> 00:17:54,111
- Okay.
424
00:17:54,155 --> 00:17:56,374
- No songs.
No people dressed in black.
425
00:17:56,418 --> 00:17:57,897
I'm going to kiss you now.
426
00:17:57,941 --> 00:18:04,948
[♪♪♪]
427
00:18:10,954 --> 00:18:13,652
Are you sure I'm not taking
advantage of your grief?
428
00:18:13,696 --> 00:18:15,350
- Oh, I'm not grieving. Get busy.
429
00:18:15,393 --> 00:18:16,699
- Uh-huh.
430
00:18:16,742 --> 00:18:18,309
[♪♪♪]
431
00:18:18,353 --> 00:18:19,397
- Paul.
432
00:18:19,441 --> 00:18:21,312
Oh, Paul.
433
00:18:21,356 --> 00:18:24,315
- Paul!
Paul?
434
00:18:24,359 --> 00:18:27,188
- Christ, I wish
he still called me Dad.
435
00:18:31,757 --> 00:18:33,281
- What's grief sex when it's at home?
436
00:18:33,324 --> 00:18:34,412
I've never heard of it.
437
00:18:34,456 --> 00:18:36,545
- Yeah, but you'd never
heard of soya milk.
438
00:18:36,588 --> 00:18:38,329
- If grief sex was a thing,
439
00:18:38,373 --> 00:18:40,897
every funeral would be a gang bang,
440
00:18:40,940 --> 00:18:42,855
and I've been to a lot of funerals lately,
441
00:18:42,899 --> 00:18:47,121
and let me tell you,
that's simply not the case.
442
00:18:47,164 --> 00:18:48,426
Is Ally okay with all this?
443
00:18:48,470 --> 00:18:50,080
- Oh, yeah, she started it,
444
00:18:50,124 --> 00:18:52,387
and it's the best sex
we've had for years,
445
00:18:52,430 --> 00:18:56,260
but it feels wrong somehow,
exploitative of both of us.
446
00:18:56,304 --> 00:18:58,915
- Bereavement’s a mad fucking ride, Paul.
447
00:18:58,958 --> 00:19:01,004
It's tough to stay sane.
448
00:19:01,047 --> 00:19:03,876
Promise me you won't have
grief sex when I die.
449
00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:06,314
- Why not? I mean,
I won't, but why not?
450
00:19:06,357 --> 00:19:08,292
- I don't want you two going
at it like shipwrecked sailors
451
00:19:08,316 --> 00:19:11,145
while I'm barely cold in the ground.
452
00:19:11,188 --> 00:19:14,931
In fact, can you abstain, out of respect,
453
00:19:14,974 --> 00:19:16,324
for, say, a month?
454
00:19:16,367 --> 00:19:18,413
My dying wish.
455
00:19:18,456 --> 00:19:20,284
- Shouldn't your dying wish be
456
00:19:20,328 --> 00:19:22,286
me looking after Mum
or something?
457
00:19:22,330 --> 00:19:24,288
- No, she'll go first.
458
00:19:24,332 --> 00:19:25,333
High cholesterol.
459
00:19:28,597 --> 00:19:31,121
- I know you.
- You don't know me.
460
00:19:31,165 --> 00:19:32,383
- I know you're not like me.
461
00:19:32,427 --> 00:19:35,473
If I'd been in your situation tonight,
462
00:19:35,517 --> 00:19:37,562
I would have run away immediately, thought,
463
00:19:37,606 --> 00:19:41,218
"I don't need this meet-the-patriarch shit."
464
00:19:41,262 --> 00:19:43,916
Ooh, the poison fairy has come. Thank you.
465
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:46,397
- Cheers.
- It's only gonna go to waste.
466
00:19:46,441 --> 00:19:48,443
- Fucking hell.
467
00:19:48,486 --> 00:19:51,402
- Notes of corduroy, very nice.
468
00:19:51,446 --> 00:19:54,492
- Ooh!
- [COUGHS]
469
00:19:54,536 --> 00:19:57,495
Um, you want to dine and dash?
470
00:19:57,539 --> 00:20:00,019
[♪♪♪]
471
00:20:00,063 --> 00:20:02,761
- We do a runner?
- Yeah.
472
00:20:02,805 --> 00:20:04,241
- I'm not doing
a fucking runner!
473
00:20:04,285 --> 00:20:06,504
- Aww! Oh, you're one of those, oh.
474
00:20:06,548 --> 00:20:08,202
- Oh, Jesus, really?
- Come on.
475
00:20:08,245 --> 00:20:10,247
I know you got a spine in there.
476
00:20:10,291 --> 00:20:11,248
Just bring it on out.
477
00:20:11,292 --> 00:20:13,424
There's a whole world out there
waiting for you.
478
00:20:13,468 --> 00:20:15,426
Plunge through it, come on.
479
00:20:15,470 --> 00:20:17,448
- Listen, if you're daring me
to do it, then I'll do it.
480
00:20:17,472 --> 00:20:19,038
- All right, I'm daring you to do it.
481
00:20:19,082 --> 00:20:21,476
- You want me to do a runner?
482
00:20:21,519 --> 00:20:23,434
Done. Fucking done.
483
00:20:23,478 --> 00:20:27,264
Right, okay.
On my... thing.
484
00:20:27,308 --> 00:20:30,180
- Your thing?
- Okay.
485
00:20:30,224 --> 00:20:31,399
Okay, ready?
486
00:20:31,442 --> 00:20:33,401
Okay, three, two, one.
487
00:20:33,444 --> 00:20:34,793
Fuck!
488
00:20:34,837 --> 00:20:36,534
- Don't you run!
What?
489
00:20:36,578 --> 00:20:37,883
- Shit!
490
00:20:37,927 --> 00:20:40,321
- Come back here!
491
00:20:40,364 --> 00:20:41,800
Hey!
492
00:20:41,844 --> 00:20:45,369
- Fucking... oh.
493
00:20:45,413 --> 00:20:49,547
Oh, man, that was incredible.
It was exciting.
494
00:20:49,591 --> 00:20:52,463
- Yeah.
- I feel alive.
495
00:20:52,507 --> 00:20:55,074
That was--
this is the real me.
496
00:20:55,118 --> 00:20:57,338
Always on my toes. Nimble.
497
00:20:57,381 --> 00:20:59,340
- No, it isn't.
- Mm.
498
00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:01,559
- The real you is the exact
opposite of that.
499
00:21:01,603 --> 00:21:03,344
- No, it's not.
500
00:21:03,387 --> 00:21:04,582
- Tell me you're not
gonna go back
501
00:21:04,606 --> 00:21:06,085
to that place tomorrow
and pay them.
502
00:21:06,129 --> 00:21:07,280
- Oh, yeah, I'm gonna do that.
503
00:21:07,304 --> 00:21:10,089
[BOTH LAUGH]
504
00:21:10,133 --> 00:21:11,090
Oh.
505
00:21:11,134 --> 00:21:13,484
Oh, shit.
506
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:19,185
- Treat her well.
507
00:21:19,229 --> 00:21:21,492
Don't be another me.
508
00:21:21,536 --> 00:21:24,887
[♪♪♪]
509
00:21:24,930 --> 00:21:27,629
- Hey, you all right?
- [GROANS]
510
00:21:27,672 --> 00:21:32,460
Give her a kiss from me.
And I apologize for my breath.
511
00:21:32,503 --> 00:21:38,727
[♪♪♪]
512
00:21:45,560 --> 00:21:49,303
- It's so lovely and peaceful.
- It's too peaceful.
513
00:21:49,346 --> 00:21:50,367
Luke hasn't done his smoke alarm
514
00:21:50,391 --> 00:21:52,436
and perimeter checks yet.
515
00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:53,568
- Mm.
516
00:21:56,092 --> 00:21:59,095
[LUKE WHIMPERING]
517
00:22:00,183 --> 00:22:02,403
- Oh.
518
00:22:02,446 --> 00:22:04,448
- Sweetheart.
- I miss Sprout.
519
00:22:04,492 --> 00:22:07,190
I used to tell him
all my secrets.
520
00:22:07,233 --> 00:22:09,758
- Baby, I'm so sorry.
521
00:22:09,801 --> 00:22:11,586
Was he a very good listener?
522
00:22:11,629 --> 00:22:12,500
- He was.
523
00:22:12,543 --> 00:22:16,417
I-I can't really feel him
inside of me.
524
00:22:16,460 --> 00:22:17,461
I lied.
525
00:22:17,505 --> 00:22:19,396
- He's always there,
even if you can't feel him.
526
00:22:19,420 --> 00:22:20,919
- You know, I think
we need to bury Sprout
527
00:22:20,943 --> 00:22:24,338
so we can all have
a proper good-bye.
528
00:22:24,381 --> 00:22:26,209
Sprout's been in the freezer
long enough.
529
00:22:26,252 --> 00:22:27,776
- Sprout is in the freezer?
530
00:22:27,819 --> 00:22:31,127
- Shh, there, there.
[MOUTHS WORD]
531
00:22:31,170 --> 00:22:37,829
[♪♪♪]
532
00:22:39,657 --> 00:22:42,617
Does anyone want to say
a few words?
533
00:22:46,142 --> 00:22:50,364
- Sprout was my friend,
my best friend.
534
00:22:50,407 --> 00:22:52,888
He liked eating.
535
00:22:52,931 --> 00:22:57,327
He, um, uh...
536
00:22:58,676 --> 00:23:00,112
I don't know what to say.
537
00:23:00,156 --> 00:23:03,681
- Sprout had a, uh, zest for life.
538
00:23:03,725 --> 00:23:05,509
He was an adventurous little soul.
539
00:23:05,553 --> 00:23:07,946
You didn't see him much,
but it was always reassuring
540
00:23:07,990 --> 00:23:11,820
to know that he was somewhere
there under the hay.
541
00:23:11,863 --> 00:23:13,493
Not that he ever really
was "there" there.
542
00:23:13,517 --> 00:23:16,651
I mean, he let me down
all the time.
543
00:23:16,694 --> 00:23:18,522
Where was he when I graduated?
544
00:23:18,566 --> 00:23:19,915
When I gave birth to Luke,
545
00:23:19,958 --> 00:23:22,961
he was up a fucking coconut tree in Oman.
546
00:23:23,005 --> 00:23:27,270
Oh... God, he could be selfish
547
00:23:27,313 --> 00:23:31,622
and erratic...
and mad and lazy.
548
00:23:33,276 --> 00:23:35,496
But he was him, he was just--
549
00:23:35,539 --> 00:23:37,672
he was Sprout.
550
00:23:37,715 --> 00:23:40,718
The egotistical
551
00:23:40,762 --> 00:23:43,721
and magical, infuriating,
552
00:23:43,765 --> 00:23:45,723
charismatic,
553
00:23:45,767 --> 00:23:50,293
sweet, lovely... gerbil.
554
00:23:51,773 --> 00:23:54,645
And we're gonna miss him.
555
00:23:54,689 --> 00:23:57,648
[SOLEMN MUSIC]
556
00:23:57,692 --> 00:23:59,520
[♪♪♪]
557
00:23:59,563 --> 00:24:01,652
- Hey, come on.
558
00:24:01,696 --> 00:24:05,569
It's all right, darling.
It's all right.
559
00:24:05,613 --> 00:24:06,614
- Can we go home now?
560
00:24:06,657 --> 00:24:08,703
- Sense the tone.
561
00:24:08,746 --> 00:24:10,705
[MELANCHOLY ROCK MUSIC]
562
00:24:10,748 --> 00:24:13,751
[SINGERS VOCALIZING]
563
00:24:13,795 --> 00:24:20,758
[♪♪♪]
564
00:25:05,890 --> 00:25:07,762
I'm good at reading and writing.
565
00:25:07,805 --> 00:25:10,765
Yes, you are. You know, I wanted to be
a writer when I was a kid.
566
00:25:10,808 --> 00:25:12,810
Or an artist, you know?
567
00:25:12,854 --> 00:25:14,638
Cartoonist, maybe.
Combine the two.
568
00:25:14,682 --> 00:25:15,683
Why didn't you?
569
00:25:17,815 --> 00:25:19,164
- [BOTH SCREAMING]
- Wake up!
570
00:25:19,208 --> 00:25:20,905
- You two came along.
- [SCREAMING]
571
00:25:20,949 --> 00:25:22,690
- Bing, bing, bing!
- Oh!
572
00:25:22,733 --> 00:25:24,813
- Life gets in the way, don't it?
- [SCREAMS, GRUNTS]
573
00:25:25,214 --> 00:25:26,476
Oh. Ow!
574
00:25:26,520 --> 00:25:27,651
You drift.
575
00:25:27,695 --> 00:25:29,044
- Ahh.
- [SCREAMING]
576
00:25:29,087 --> 00:25:31,742
I'm not blaming you.
Just... you did ask. Right.
577
00:25:36,921 --> 00:25:38,575
Aren't you Lil Dicky?
578
00:25:38,619 --> 00:25:40,316
♪ Yes, I know
That I'm a rapper ♪
579
00:25:40,359 --> 00:25:42,100
- ♪ At the end of the day ♪
- [GASPING]
580
00:25:42,144 --> 00:25:45,843
♪ But I think It's time you knew me
By my government name ♪
581
00:25:45,887 --> 00:25:47,889
- ♪ Hi, I'm Dave ♪
- ANNOUNCER: Dave.
582
00:25:47,932 --> 00:25:49,586
All-new Wednesday at 10:00
on FXX.
583
00:25:49,630 --> 00:25:51,632
And next day, FX on Hulu.
584
00:25:52,937 --> 00:25:54,417
Whoa!
585
00:25:54,460 --> 00:25:56,158
How bad is it
for the environment?
586
00:25:56,201 --> 00:25:57,812
- Really bad.
- [GROANS]
587
00:25:57,855 --> 00:26:00,510
- Mom, this car doesn't fit all of us.
- I know.
588
00:26:02,643 --> 00:26:04,383
Oof. Do we look alike?
589
00:26:04,427 --> 00:26:07,822
- Are our gabilas the same?
- My God, Mom!
590
00:26:07,865 --> 00:26:09,040
[SNICKERS]
Ooh!
591
00:26:10,825 --> 00:26:13,741
- [HOWLING]
- I see what's on the other side.
592
00:26:13,784 --> 00:26:14,785
[LAUGHING]
593
00:26:14,829 --> 00:26:17,614
Welcome to my midlife crisis!
594
00:26:26,884 --> 00:26:29,887
Do me a favor?
Never look me in the eye again.
595
00:26:29,931 --> 00:26:32,847
Okay? 'Cause your stare
is way too intense.
596
00:26:32,890 --> 00:26:34,410
It's starting to make
my hair fall out.
597
00:26:39,984 --> 00:26:41,116
What is Devs?
598
00:26:42,596 --> 00:26:43,597
What is Devs?
599
00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:44,772
What is Devs?
600
00:26:46,077 --> 00:26:47,470
[SCREAMS]